Submission Information:
Series: Pokémon
Game: Pokémon X & Pokémon Y
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: Route 15
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: cashwarrior1 (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?action=profile;u=4449)
[attachment deleted by admin]
Alrighty, what did I forget to do this time?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iL0PgiEfrAA
You forgot the following things (partly thanks to Finale Notepad limitations):
-Measure 1 (or 6 maybe?..) : The mezzo forte is in a questionable place. I can't tell where it belongs. Which staff does it belong to?
-Technically 120 BPM is considered Allegro, but for I rarely label it as such because it rarely feels Allegro. I would argue that it doesn't here, so I would suggest changing it or removing it.
-Measure 2, Beats 3-4, LH: These rests are broken up for no reason. Fuse these into a half rest.
-Measure 1-2, RH: There's a G in this chord that I'm not seeing in your sheet. Add that in. Also, get rid of the A. It doesn't belong. Likewise, make the same shaped chord in measures 3-4.
-Measure 8, Beat 4, RH: This pickup belongs half a beat later than you have it written here. It should be an 8th note.
-Measure 9, Beats 1-3, RH: There has to be a prettier way to notate this. Find something that works.
-Measure 9-24, LH: I know in certain circles, the usage of the dot on a beat that technically is wrong will fly ok, but in a case like this (where usage of staccatos just results in a crapload of dots), it gets confusing. I'm also a strong advocate for not using both staccato and augmentation dots on the same note, as they do exact opposite things. Completely counterproductive. At the very least, rewrite this using ties so it is theoretically sound.
-Measures 11, 13-17, 19-22, 25-27, 29-31: The notes on beat one of all the aforementioned measures can be written as a dotted quarter instead of the whole tie thing. Simplify your life.
-Measure 10, RH: Your layers and stem directions are all out of whack. Clean that up.
-Measures 10, 12, and 16; RH: All the floating 8th notes are unnecessarily high up. Bring them back to earth if you don't mind. :P
-Measure 12, Beat 3, RH: Rewrite this little ornament as a mordent. Makes it cleaner and also removes the need for that uncanny looking 16th rest.
-Measure 12, Beat 4, RH: Hide one of these rests and move the other to what would otherwise be its normal position in the middle of the staff.
-Measure 12: Your pedal marking isn't going all the way to the end of the measure. Is this intentional? Also, maybe move the next system down a bit to make some room for this. It's kinda really crammed right now.
-Measure 16, Beat 4.5, RH: These notes are kinda crowded. Maybe spread them out a tad so they aren't running each other over.
-Measure 18, Beat 4, RH: I would move the quarter rest down a tad so it isn't touching the notes above it.
-Measure 18-24: I just have absolutely no idea what's going on with the pedal markings. 'Nuff said.
-Measure 21, RH: The arpeggiation isn't completely vertical. Also, the F in the right hand is of the same line as the E in the LH right before it. Find a way to indicate that: either have both the E and F in the same staff, or use a dotted line to indicate the contour of the phrase.
-Measure 17-end (mostly): Frequently your 2nd layer is the one above the 1st layer, which is backwards from the way it was supposed to be done. Technically this in and of itself isn't a make-it-or-break-it issue, but it's making some big problems with stem direction in certain places. I'll pick them out more specifically but if you can, might as well change that. It's necessary to achieve total perfection.
-First system of the second page: Spread the RH and LH staves cuz the beams are overlapping in between, and also move the entire system down some so the measure number (22) isn't hugging the page number. You have space so be sure to use it.
-Measure 23, RH: Again, your arpeggiation is clearly lopsided. Straighten it out please.
-Measure 24, LH: Stem direction issues. There may be more to fix here yet, but nothing can be done till the stems/layers are fixed.
-Measure 28, RH and LH: Again, stem directions are backwards. This is due to the layer problem aforementioned.
-Measure 32, Beat 1-4.5, RH: You can rewrite this chord as a double dotted half note. Saves ties and stuff. And you got the pickup into the repeat correct here. Good for you.
I haven't listened for wrong/missing notes, so yeah, I pretty much completely focused on formatting. I'll see if I can help with implementing some of these things when I get the time.
Will have this all fixed later today. Thanks for the criticism feedback!
Quote from: JDMEK5 on April 27, 2016, 09:38:56 PM-Measure 9, Beats 1-3, RH: There has to be a prettier way to notate this. Find something that works.
I can't find a a better way to notate this. I intended the Es to be played staccato, but if I put it in a different layer, it interferes with the stems.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on April 27, 2016, 09:38:56 PM-Measure 12, Beat 4, RH: Hide one of these rests and move the other to what would otherwise be its normal position in the middle of the staff.
I cheated to get this, but I don't think I can do that, or I just don't know how.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on April 27, 2016, 09:38:56 PM-Measure 18-24: I just have absolutely no idea what's going on with the pedal markings. 'Nuff said.
Some are for the eight note octaves, I wanted them to be legato. The other is for a big chunk of stuff you'd need to pedal.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on April 27, 2016, 09:38:56 PM-Measure 16, Beat 4.5, RH: These notes are kinda crowded. Maybe spread them out a tad so they aren't running each other over.
-Measure 17-end (mostly): Frequently your 2nd layer is the one above the 1st layer, which is backwards from the way it was supposed to be done. Technically this in and of itself isn't a make-it-or-break-it issue, but it's making some big problems with stem direction in certain places. I'll pick them out more specifically but if you can, might as well change that. It's necessary to achieve total perfection.
-First system of the second page: Spread the RH and LH staves cuz the beams are overlapping in between, and also move the entire system down some so the measure number (22) isn't hugging the page number. You have space so be sure to use it.
Can't.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on April 27, 2016, 09:38:56 PM-Measure 32, Beat 1-4.5, RH: You can rewrite this chord as a double dotted half note. Saves ties and stuff. And you got the pickup into the repeat correct here. Good for you.
It's tied because there's a note change. And I can't do double dotted notes.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/84117653/Assistance/Pokemon%20XY%20-%20Route%2015.mus
I fixed up most of the layout issues. I haven't listened to it or the original, so I'm not making any judgements as to its accuracy.
Things worth noting:
-The usage of pedal markings is questionable at best. I left it as it was, but it needs a major rethink.
-Bar 6: Beaming can be used in creative ways.
-Bar 9 is now readable.
-Bar 10 is still a bit strange and it doesn't convey the trajectory of the voices quite right, but I suppose it's passable so I left it. I'll leave it up to you to fix the rhythm grouping issue as you see fit.
-Bar 12: The stems were pointing the wrong way.
-Bar 16 was crammed, and the stems were pointing the wrong way on the last beat
-Bar 21: If you're going to make a voice switch hands, do it properly. Also, use the articulation tool (not the line tool) when making the glissandi lines. It produces a much better, more consistent appearance.
-Bar 24: I'm not quite sure what was going on there. Either way, 2 ledger lines is by no means difficult to read.
-Bar 25 onwards: The arpeggios were a mess, so I cleaned them up.
-Bar 30: Beat 3 in the RH was a mess, so I did the best I could.
-Bar 32: If you want to have one note change, put it in its own voice. You can do it the way for JDMEK5 suggested above with double dotting, but I just wanted to demonstrate how it can be done without it.
Thanks, a lot of those things I don't know how to do and can't do.
Fixed measure 10. One note was moved by accident.
Just a question about bar 28 because there are semibreves written with quavers on a separate layer with no ped. marked. When I was just playing through this it was just something I picked up because it won't sound a semibreve without the ped. so I dunno just asking what would be best there. In most other bars like this the RH can cover those bits.
Also in bar 24 the quavers are chords in the music but that doesn't really affect the playing so just thought I'd raise that
I'm not qualified, don't bother with this if you don't think it applies
I don't know what semibreves are and what quavers are. I added pedal to measure 28 and fixed the position of some of the markings.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 20, 2016, 12:12:32 PMI don't know what semibreves are and what quavers are. I added pedal to measure 28 and fixed the position of some of the markings.
Semibreve (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whole_note)
Quaver (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eighth_note)
Feel free to use google.
Canadians are cute
Why are the staccatos so far away from the notes?
^ What on earth happened there???? It definitely didn't look like that when I was done with it.
Well... My laptop is kinda... stupid. I dunno, whenever I open up a song someone else made, everything gets pushed like that and I can't fix it.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 20, 2016, 07:33:12 PMWell... My laptop is kinda... stupid. I dunno, whenever I open up a song someone else made, everything gets pushed like that and I can't fix it.
Maybe try reinstalling Notepad?
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 20, 2016, 12:12:32 PMI don't know what semibreves are and what quavers are. I added pedal to measure 28 and fixed the position of some of the markings.
oof. I'm so sorry lol d you call them quarter notes or half notes and stuff
Quote from: Ōkami~MD on May 21, 2016, 11:53:16 AMoof. I'm so sorry lol d you call them quarter notes or half notes and stuff
Lol you should feel free to use whatever term is used in your country (applying to everyone in general and nobody in particular). It's everyone else's job to know what you're talking about. Especially when the world is so connected via the internet. I'd say the confusion was productive; learning was achieved which is never a waste of time.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on May 21, 2016, 09:56:12 AMMaybe try reinstalling Notepad?
That didn't work. :(
If your Notepad isn't working, you may need some divine intervention. That is, you may need someone with Finale to finish your sheet for you since you can't touch it:
Quote from: Deku Trombonist on May 20, 2016, 06:53:58 PMWhat on earth happened there???? It definitely didn't look like that when I was done with it.
Double posting cuz important news:
After many hours and sleep deprivation, Latios and I revamped it to a degree that we both feel is ready for final moderator checks. As far as we figured, nothing more needs to be done to it before then.
https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/93589150/Pokemon%20XY%20-%20Route%2015.mus
Oh, thank you so much! I've found a problem, however, if I replace my versions with this one it will move everything up/down and look messy again.
I gotchu
Thank you so much! :D. I really need a new computer :P
Some brief thoughts for Latios whoever's editing this:
M. 7: make sure the note heads are aligned; currently they don't look like they are.
M. 12: I'm usually a stickler for staying authentic, but those thirds look near unplayable for anyone not capable of the Chopin thirds etude (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cBsRQ6_Y5I0). Perhaps make every other note a third? That way you still have the slightly thicker texture, but it's ever so slightly more possible, lol.
M. 16: The voices probably need to be better aligned; currently, it's quite hard to tell what's desired there.
Pretty good!
PDS:
m. 7: I checked using the Note Position Tool (and held a straightedge against the screen lol) and it seems fine to me.
m. 12: I agree that it's tough (I
suck at piano hate playing consecutive thirds!!) but I don't think it hurts to have them like this. If I were to print and play this, I'd simply ignore the bottom layer. Though, if anyone has a super strong opposition to it, we don't have to include it. Idk.
m. 16: How would you write it? I can't immediately think of another way to place the E next to the layer 1 dyad that wouldn't make it look even weirder.
cashwarrior:
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on April 27, 2016, 06:41:53 PMAlrighty, what did I forget to do this time?
Please please get your sheets fixed up in the personal arrangements/help boards before submitting. I know it's tempting to think that you'll get more feedback by submitting, but in reality subpar arrangements (formatting/accuracy-wise) end up clogging up space on the submissions board which really should be for quick feedback and then acceptance. It'd help us streamline the submission review process. A lot of us are just a quick PM or Skype message away (myself included) and it's better to do that to get help on your sheet before submitting.
Okay, I'll try to remember to double check my sheets before submitting (some of the notes are questionable...).
This submission has been accepted by Bespinben (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?action=profile;u=2510).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot