So I realized Slow asking me for advice in the Made Mah Day topic may derail it a bit, so here's a thread to talk about relationships? Get advice? Vent? Etc?
I can try to give advice /shrug
Don't expect much 8D I can't even get guys lolollololololol
http://www.ninsheetm.us/smf/index.php?topic=3257.0
Finish your god damn book about this.
You're leaving me hanging, girl.
^ I was just about to post that.
Honestly, I forgot all about that! I'll post an update soon. :)
Yeah ETF, how is the NSM community ever gonna get laid if you never finish your book?
Well there's always money but most of us are poor (and Irish) here.
Give the college students a break!
I usually walk with my ex through b hall from lunch, but I told her I was going a different way cause it would be faster.
It is faster, but I did it so I could stop thinking about her eyes.
Apparently she hates her eyes, but... :(
So this girl I'm kinda close with came up to me between classes, hugged me, linked arms with me, and we walked to her class while we talked. She does this quite often. But I don't think she likes me, I think I kinda bore her with my awkward sentences and inability to make small talk. Idk. Other people have told me they think she's into me buuuuut idk. What's the diagnosis Dr. ETF...?
Sounds like flirting to me. She can't be too bored with you if she goes up to you all the time and the like. :P
For example: My freshman year I liked this guy in my Algebra class. I'd say hi to him every day without fail just to have an excuse to hopefully flirt.
We ended up dating for over a year and a half. Y'know, once he got the guts to ask me out.
Hmm. Thanks, that's interesting to know.
ASK HER OUT, YOU FOOL!
SHADDUP >:( I'M A WIMP OKAY
Slow you either ask her out or I'll fly to wherever you live and put together a group of people who will sing "Kiss The Girl" and follow you guys around all day.
ASK. HER. OUT.
I'll give you some advice. DON'T THINK ABOUT IT, JUST DO IT. Overthinking a new, stressful experience can kill you(figuratively.... and sometimes literally). Overthinking will psych you out, cause you to freeze up, get nervous, and not go through with it. So don't think about when, or where, or how your gonna ask her out. Just do it the moment you see her. Be spontaneous and eccentric and say the first thing that comes to you, with putting any thought into it. Girls like things like that, as far as I know.(why else would ETF have married me?)
Also, Nebbles' plan is brilliant as well.
Oh SFK, you and ETF could create one of those relationship-advice-talk shows. Or at least make a book (though ETF has already gotten on that xD).
If you haven't gotten this already...JUST DO IT MAN! Girls definately like a guy who knows what he wants. lol
*cough*Sandwiches*cough*
*cough*i lol'd*cough*
Look, if you don't do this Slow, you're very effectively friend-zoning yourself. It's one thing if you get friend-zoned by them, but if you do it to yourself, you only have yourself to blame. SO JUST DO IT!!! GOGOGOGO!!!!! (Do it in person too, no need to do it over the internet or by text message)
If you get rejected you can still be friends probably and still work towards it by being charming and all that jazz.
Quote from: Nebbles on February 08, 2012, 06:47:15 PMSlow you either ask her out or I'll fly to wherever you live and put together a group of people who will sing "Kiss The Girl" and follow you guys around all day.
ASK. HER. OUT.
I love this idea.
Whoa. Didn't expect a riot. O_o it's not a big deal guys. I guess we would already consider ourselves "friends" but I don't know if that means I'm in the friend zone. I don't think I am. I don't know. Don't want to force things. I don't see her that often which could kinda be a problem.
Plus there's the fact that I kinda think I like a couple other girls? DON'T JUDGE ME. Also SFK keeps distracting me with his sexiness so I'm always confused.
22:22 Vera Me And The NSM Relationships Topic: "Should I try to be the devil's advocate and try to argue that SlowPokemon shouldn't bother jumping on primitive instincts for this one girl... I suppose I will..." *While in middle of post* "Actually, I changed my mind." *Repeat*
22:23 Vera omg slowpokemon is being logical
22:23 Vera yay
We're just looking out for each other, that's all.
If you decide to hesitate between a few potential girls, you'll end up finding yourself watching them walk away with other guys who made their decisive moves first.
Oh Slow, liking all of the ladies.
Compensates for the fact that I haven't had a crush on anyone in a very long time. XD
And what Nakah said is true. Don't let that happen to you.
I would deem it better to be in no relations than to have participated in many that failed to be honest (and don't argue that this isn't true; very few high school relationships will ever result in a successful marriage).
Also, whoever said that it is better to have loved than not at all evidently had no clue what he/she was talking about, because by lacking the experience of love, one would simply have little to no desire for it and would therefore view it in a neutral light.
Plus, asexuals are super coll.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 08, 2012, 07:15:03 PMAlso SFK keeps distracting me with his sexiness so I'm always confused.
It happens to everyone. More of a curse, my sexiness is, really.
Quote from: Mashi on February 08, 2012, 07:34:10 PMI would deem it better to be in no relations than to have participated in many that failed to be honest (and don't argue that this isn't true; very few high school relationships will ever result in a successful marriage).
Also, whoever said that it is better to have loved than not at all evidently had no clue what he/she was talking about, because by lacking the experience of love, one would simply have little to no desire for it and would therefore view it in a neutral light.
Plus, asexuals are super coll.
But once you've experienced true pure love, there's nothing like it. I'm afraid I must concur with the quote you denounced. But I don't really feel that way towards this girl. Or any of the others. Just Margaret and that was a while ago and I'm never going back. She never gave a damn about my feelings. She's still my friend and I couldn't live without her. But the whole time she was totally unconcerned with me. Maybe it wasn't even her fault, but it was really kind of awful of her.
Oh and speaking of her, she's now dating a freshman she plays next to in the school band. While it's already awkward that she's two years older, HE'S FRIENDS WITH MY BROTHER. Can you spell awkward? >__>
But moving on I don't know if I should move ahead with this girl. I don't think I want to force anything.
I'd say start moving ahead, but slowly? Like don't just... jump on her. Try and hang out with her more. Get to know her a bit better. But if she's already comfortable with you, then there's not much to wait for.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 08, 2012, 07:15:03 PMWhoa. Didn't expect a riot. O_o it's not a big deal guys. I guess we would already consider ourselves "friends" but I don't know if that means I'm in the friend zone. I don't think I am. I don't know. Don't want to force things. I don't see her that often which could kinda be a problem.
you'll never know if you don't try.
My gf and I are both going speed dating at Pi Phi on Friday. This could end well or very very badly :P
Quote from: spitllama on February 08, 2012, 08:47:31 PMMy gf and I are both going speed dating at Pi Phi on Friday. This could end well or very very badly :P
Agreed xD Whyyyy would you do that? ???
@Slow
This is a bit of a confusing situation and I really don't know what to say, except maybe you should try things out. It might make her happy, and maybe you'd learn a few things too...you can still try things out seeing that stuff in high school don't necessarily mean everything's serious yet.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 08, 2012, 07:48:11 PMBut once you've experienced true pure love, there's nothing like it...She never gave a damn about my feelings. She's still my friend and I couldn't live without her. But the whole time she was totally unconcerned with me. Maybe it wasn't even her fault, but it was really kind of awful of her.
Isn't it hard to say something like that when (you said) she didn't care about your feelings? :/
Quote from: spitllama on February 08, 2012, 08:47:31 PMMy gf and I are both going speed dating at Pi Phi on Friday. This could end well or very very badly :P
Yeah... I don't get it. Why are you doing that in the first place?
I guess my situation on that field could be nicely summed up by a popular picture:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi2.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F003%2F619%2FUntitled-1.jpg&hash=8491fb2fd780cb10680f3705b095d9d1822179c6)
Ticking off ALL the boxes of the stereotype. Way to go...
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 09, 2012, 04:39:45 AMYeah... I don't get it. Why are you doing that in the first place?
Proceeds go to charity, so we thought we'd just stop by and goof off. You talk to people for 60 seconds each.
Quote from: Ruto on February 08, 2012, 10:18:19 PMIsn't it hard to say something like that when (you said) she didn't care about your feelings? :/
Agreed. You can have feeling like that, but it's not the REAL TRUE PURE LOVE until you both feel that way. :P
All the girls at my high school are NOTHING like the ones that were at my middle school. There's not one girl I'd ask out at my high school... It's kind of mean to say, but no girl at my high school is anything like me. There is a girl that I should've asked out at my middle school, but I choked up every time I had the chance. Now I regret it so much, I'll probably never see her ever again... Why did god have to make me so shy? :(
Quote from: Ragster2448 on February 09, 2012, 12:56:37 PMThere is a girl that I should've asked out at my middle school, but I choked up every time I had the chance. Now I regret it so much, I'll probably never see her ever again... Why did god have to make me so shy? :(
Hahaha! I have that problem too. Right now.
But she's too young. XD
Quote from: fingerz on February 09, 2012, 12:51:16 PMAgreed. You can have feeling like that, but it's not the REAL TRUE PURE LOVE until you both feel that way. :P
Wrong. Sorry to sound like a stereotypical teenager but if what I felt wasn't being in love then I don't know what is.
^We're sure you love her by the sound of things, but I think he meant that it's true love if she feels the same way about you...
Petrarch's poetry would fit this situation perfectly. No joke.
There's a difference between infatuation and love...
Maybe I was just infatuated with my ex? d:
okay maybe not but meh
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 09, 2012, 03:15:28 PMWrong. Sorry to sound like a stereotypical teenager but if what I felt wasn't being in love then I don't know what is.
Sorry, but it sounds like you don't know what love is, and I think I might have an idea why that might be. Once upon a time there was a girl on my baseball team when we were in 2nd grade. I instantly fell for her ways, looks, mannerisms; everything. Yet, we went to different schools so once baseball season ended, so did contact.
Then came middle school, when both schools merged when entering 6th grade. Upon the summer of 7th grade year, I was on a camping trip with family and friends, and this girl happened to be going with one of the families that were camping with us(as in we all would rent out the same few campsites next to each other). So typical middle school magic went down and we started dating. Then, about a week later, typical Middle-School Girl Syndrome(oh yes) kicked in, and she broke it off for the next guy-thing in line. You can only imagine my frustration at her dim-wittedness, and lack of consideration, "but oh, she's young, so maybe youth is the reason to excuse her" I thought. So let's get to high school.
The rest of this story is a little complicated, but essentially, we had on and off 'things' throughout the next few years, but the end result was always the same: she'd one day suddenly be interested in another guy(typically older) and would act as if there had never been anything between us.
SO senior year comes around, and she's already dating one guy who's she had been with for over a year, but in the beginning of the year we start to become really close. Closer than ever, and we sort of develop this deep bond/connection thing. I couldn't ever have been more sure of the feeling of "love" until now. There was absolutely no way that things could go downhill from here, I thought, based off of words and special moments that we had shared. I'm sure you can tell where this is going, and long story short, the whole thing crashed and burned; her lying and sneaking around caused her relationship to crash(even though she was aware of it, and somewhat planned for it to turn out that way(hence the reason for me in the first place), and she at the same time spun more lies and manipulation towards me to help her get through the breakup phase. Once she was out of that phase and realized she was now single and "free," she absolved from the situation entirely, leaving an ice cold shoulder for me, acting as though she never talked to me and nothing had ever happened to begin with. That's when I learned she had channeled her flirtyness and secrecy to a new guy. And the cycle continued(for him, anyways).
In the end, some girls are just
SNAKES. If she has no consideration for your feelings now, don't stick around for her, because chances are she will always leave you out in the dust for whatever captures her greater interest at the time. Even if you don't think you could live without her and are sure that you can accept her for her flaws and shortcoming no matter what etc, if she doesn't treat you well in the end, then is that something you really want? You should focus on a girl that you can build a respectable trust with, with some sort of reliability. At least that's what I realized I wanted after that whole situation, and it caused me to re-evaluate myself and my entire perception of love, and I came to great epiphanies about my self towards the end of the year, but at the price of great pain.
So don't go all out for just one girl because you think it's real love. Find someone who will always meet you half way in the end. There's greater strength in trust than passion.
Wow. That post deserves an award.
Re-post for new page:
Quote from: Nakah on February 09, 2012, 05:59:29 PMSorry, but it sounds like you don't know what love is, and I think I might have an idea why that might be. Once upon a time there was a girl on my baseball team when we were in 2nd grade. I instantly fell for her ways, looks, mannerisms; everything. Yet, we went to different schools so once baseball season ended, so did contact.
Then came middle school, when both schools merged when entering 6th grade. Upon the summer of 7th grade year, I was on a camping trip with family and friends, and this girl happened to be going with one of the families that were camping with us(as in we all would rent out the same few campsites next to each other). So typical middle school magic went down and we started dating. Then, about a week later, typical Middle-School Girl Syndrome(oh yes) kicked in, and she broke it off for the next guy-thing in line. You can only imagine my frustration at her dim-wittedness, and lack of consideration, "but oh, she's young, so maybe youth is the reason to excuse her" I thought. So let's get to high school.
The rest of this story is a little complicated, but essentially, we had on and off 'things' throughout the next few years, but the end result was always the same: she'd one day suddenly be interested in another guy(typically older) and would act as if there had never been anything between us.
SO senior year comes around, and she's already dating one guy who's she had been with for over a year, but in the beginning of the year we start to become really close. Closer than ever, and we sort of develop this deep bond/connection thing. I couldn't ever have been more sure of the feeling of "love" until now. There was absolutely no way that things could go downhill from here, I thought, based off of words and special moments that we had shared. I'm sure you can tell where this is going, and long story short, the whole thing crashed and burned; her lying and sneaking around caused her relationship to crash(even though she was aware of it, and somewhat planned for it to turn out that way(hence the reason for me in the first place), and she at the same time spun more lies and manipulation towards me to help her get through the breakup phase. Once she was out of that phase and realized she was now single and "free," she absolved from the situation entirely, leaving an ice cold shoulder for me, acting as though she never talked to me and nothing had ever happened to begin with. That's when I learned she had channeled her flirtyness and secrecy to a new guy. And the cycle continued(for him, anyways).
In the end, some girls are just SNAKES. If she has no consideration for your feelings now, don't stick around for her, because chances are she will always leave you out in the dust for whatever captures her greater interest at the time. Even if you don't think you could live without her and are sure that you can accept her for her flaws and shortcoming no matter what etc, if she doesn't treat you well in the end, then is that something you really want? You should focus on a girl that you can build a respectable trust with, with some sort of reliability. At least that's what I realized I wanted after that whole situation, and it caused me to re-evaluate myself and my entire perception of love, and I came to great epiphanies about my self towards the end of the year, but at the price of great pain.
So don't go all out for just one girl because you think it's real love. Find someone who will always meet you half way in the end. There's greater strength in trust than passion.
Quote from: Nakah on February 09, 2012, 05:59:29 PMSorry, but it sounds like you don't know what love is, and I think I might have an idea why that might be. Once upon a time there was a girl on my baseball team when we were in 2nd grade. I instantly fell for her ways, looks, mannerisms; everything. Yet, we went to different schools so once baseball season ended, so did contact.
Then came middle school, when both schools merged when entering 6th grade. Upon the summer of 7th grade year, I was on a camping trip with family and friends, and this girl happened to be going with one of the families that were camping with us(as in we all would rent out the same few campsites next to each other). So typical middle school magic went down and we started dating. Then, about a week later, typical Middle-School Girl Syndrome(oh yes) kicked in, and she broke it off for the next guy-thing in line. You can only imagine my frustration at her dim-wittedness, and lack of consideration, "but oh, she's young, so maybe youth is the reason to excuse her" I thought. So let's get to high school.
The rest of this story is a little complicated, but essentially, we had on and off 'things' throughout the next few years, but the end result was always the same: she'd one day suddenly be interested in another guy(typically older) and would act as if there had never been anything between us.
SO senior year comes around, and she's already dating one guy who's she had been with for over a year, but in the beginning of the year we start to become really close. Closer than ever, and we sort of develop this deep bond/connection thing. I couldn't ever have been more sure of the feeling of "love" until now. There was absolutely no way that things could go downhill from here, I thought, based off of words and special moments that we had shared. I'm sure you can tell where this is going, and long story short, the whole thing crashed and burned; her lying and sneaking around caused her relationship to crash(even though she was aware of it, and somewhat planned for it to turn out that way(hence the reason for me in the first place), and she at the same time spun more lies and manipulation towards me to help her get through the breakup phase. Once she was out of that phase and realized she was now single and "free," she absolved from the situation entirely, leaving an ice cold shoulder for me, acting as though she never talked to me and nothing had ever happened to begin with. That's when I learned she had channeled her flirtyness and secrecy to a new guy. And the cycle continued(for him, anyways).
In the end, some girls are just SNAKES. If she has no consideration for your feelings now, don't stick around for her, because chances are she will always leave you out in the dust for whatever captures her greater interest at the time. Even if you don't think you could live without her and are sure that you can accept her for her flaws and shortcoming no matter what etc, if she doesn't treat you well in the end, then is that something you really want? You should focus on a girl that you can build a respectable trust with, with some sort of reliability. At least that's what I realized I wanted after that whole situation, and it caused me to re-evaluate myself and my entire perception of love, and I came to great epiphanies about my self towards the end of the year, but at the price of great pain.
So don't go all out for just one girl because you think it's real love. Find someone who will always meet you half way in the end. There's greater strength in trust than passion.
I don't think it deserves an award :x mostly because I mean something completely different and don't really know how to explain it. I'm not still in love with her. But when I was? I definitely was. I...don't know. I'm not phrasing this right. I'm giving up. Let's move on.
Also...uhh why did you post it again? Mod, Y U NO FOLLOW SPAM RULES D:
It's not spam, I had sound reason to post it again. On other forums that I frequent, it's customary to repost something if it was of some sort of significance and fell to the bottom of the previous page. That way the content of the post wouldn't be skipped over by someone that was too lazy to look back a page.
The post was meant to address how you said she treated you, and how you felt. So I was just going off of what I saw. There's much more to my situation just as well, but that's the best I could do making it relevant to your situation.
You re-posting my quote directly under my quote is more qualified to be spam, however.
And saying "I'm not in love with her anymore, but when I was..." Makes it sound even less like love than I originally thought. If the feelings are deep enough, they stay there even if you end up hating the person in the end. Part of you still feels those deep feelings. Thus, the Blues genre was born!
But I mean you're talking about your own situation so it's a different circumstance with different conditions, etc.
Meh I had the quote in my post before you posted it again. :P I got the "a new reply has been posted!" and I saw it was the same thing.
Also you make some pretty good points, I guess.
Falling /out/ of love is difficult.
After we broke up, I made myself stop liking the way she acted, and now I'm making excuses so I don't have to see her eyes...
She complains that she doesn't like them.
Brown seems boring to her I guess?, and also she got them from her mom, who she doesn't really like.
Her dark, hazel eyes that seem to shine in the light; I...
blaaaah. Go away. I usually walk by her Spanish class to get to AP Stat, started taking a different path cuz "It's shorter."
The path is slightly shorter, but that wasn't really the main reason. :(
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 09, 2012, 06:33:12 PMAlso you make some pretty good points, I guess.
Nah say what you really think. Re-reading my own posts; I'm always full of self-ridicule. I encourage the notion of speaking harsh truths, rather than retaining thoughts and feelings because you don't want to come off as mean.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 09, 2012, 06:44:37 PMFalling /out/ of love is difficult.
After we broke up, I made myself stop liking the way she acted, and now I'm making excuses so I don't have to see her eyes...
She complains that she doesn't like them.
Brown seems boring to her I guess?, and also she got them from her mom, who she doesn't really like.
Her dark, hazel eyes that seem to shine in the light; I...
blaaaah. Go away. I usually walk by her Spanish class to get to AP Stat, started taking a different path cuz "It's shorter."
The path is slightly shorter, but that wasn't really the main reason. :(
Repression is an unhealthy thing. Repressing feelings as a sort of defense mechanism is what that sounds like. Accepting that you're really all out attracted to her is the first step to true self-healing. It's easier to carry good feelings for someone you can't have, rather than hatred. It's also easier to move on if those feelings are positive.
ITT Nakah's psychotherapy sessions.
Quote from: Nakah on February 09, 2012, 06:46:12 PMNah say what you really think. Re-reading my own posts; I'm always full of self-ridicule. I encourage the notion of speaking harsh truths, rather than retaining thoughts and feelings because you don't want to come off as mean.
Repression is an unhealthy thing. Repressing feelings as a sort of defense mechanism is what that sounds like. Accepting that you're really all out attracted to her is the first step to true self-healing. It's easier to carry good feelings for someone you can't have, rather than hatred. It's also easier to move on if those feelings are positive.
Nonono, I'm not holding anything back. I really am kinda mulling over everything you said. Plus I don't want a fight or anything. I'm not totally sure I know what I'm talking about. O_o
Yeah, but neither am I. I have no desire for any fight or debate either, but I would rather see a "No dumbdumb, you're wrong and this is why." Rather than "I somewhat agree, but whatever." sort of thing. That's all. It makes discussion more interesting(and better) when emotions are riled up a bit, given that boundaries and people in the discussion are respected.
I don't really try to repress my feelings, I just try to change them.
If you give me time, I can feel however I want about something.
However, things that I've felt for a longer time (the ridiculous amount of time that I was dating her), the harder it is to change.
The only downside about being able to decide how I feel about something is that if I don't force an emotional response, there often isn't one...
Nawh, it's so cute to hear ya guys talk so sensitively.
Personally, I hate love and I hope to never fall in love again.
My last crush was a total disaster.
Disaster capital letters disaster.
<etf rants about perspective on love>
I, personally, believe that when you love someone they make you want more for yourself, for them, and for everyone. They make life brighter, not just by being around. They make you want to be a better person, change for the better, or just make you feel amazing about who you are. Because they love who you are. It's not just about falling for their traits, physical attributes, etc. It's also about the effect they have on your life.
Personally, I'd find it hard to love someone that treated me like dirt and made no aspect of my life better, whatsoever. Part of why I love my boyfriend so much is because he makes me want to be a better person which, without really knowing it, is what I've wanted all along.
</etf rants about perspective on love>
I'd agree with that. Good sum up.
Agree, although it's easy to talk like that when there is somebody who loves you for who you are.
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 12, 2012, 04:48:37 AMAgree, although it's easy to talk like that when there is somebody who loves you for who you are.
Yeah.
Also ETF I never said Margaret treated me like dirt? Why would I still be best friends with her if she treated me like dirt?
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 12, 2012, 04:48:37 AMAgree, although it's easy to talk like that when there is somebody who loves you for who you are.
Yeah, it's nice to think that's easy to find, but it seems more people these days are confused about whether or not that's the case -.- It's much harder with freakin' Twilight (setting unrealistic expectations), TV dramas (stereotypes), computer based matching (a search engine sorting and matching by irrelevant things) and obsession with...coitus >__>
Just noticing this, but a lot of singles I know are obsessed about at least one of those and complain about being single but never give a thought about when/whether there was someone who liked them the way they were.
/n00b rant
^ I know there are people who like me the way I am, but these are not the people I fall in love with usually. And even if I do, the feeling's never mutual.
Point is, most guys I fall in love with, are superficial bitches, only looking at what's on the outside. But never mind, enough of this whining of mine.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 12, 2012, 06:58:12 AMYeah.
Also ETF I never said Margaret treated me like dirt? Why would I still be best friends with her if she treated me like dirt?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 08, 2012, 07:48:11 PMShe never gave a damn about my feelings.
^This could be interpreted as "She treated me like dirt". It could mean "She was blind to/didn't care about mah love". Just sayin
If we made an NSM version of Midsummer's Night Dream, who would be who?
Me and Mashi would be everybody. Which reminds me, we still need to read through the entire thing on tinychat.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 12, 2012, 12:49:34 PMIf we made an NSM version of Midsummer's Night Dream, who would be who?
I would probably be Demetrius XD
i call the pretty angels
idk if there are even angels in it
also sfk i havent read it because we havent voice acted it in the chat :(
If there is a random stone or tree standing along a road somewhere mentioned in the piece, that would probably be me.
You could be one of the actors that are supposed to perform in the wedding. :D
Yeah we just started reading it and I don't remember really anything from when I originally read it (5 years ago. D:)
I think we should actually do this in tinychat. Yes?
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on February 12, 2012, 12:46:32 PM^This could be interpreted as "She treated me like dirt". It could mean "She was blind to/didn't care about mah love". Just sayin
Thanks SFK. I was gonna go and look for that quote. But yeah. And guys, even if I didn't have someone like that I'm still right. Now enough of your pity parties. Is it easier for me to think like that? Yes. Does that make me any less right? No.
</annoyed>
Also Slow, I recall you telling me she found out you basically had a huge thing for her and kind of made fun of you? Didn't really care? Etc?
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 12, 2012, 02:19:51 PMThanks SFK. I was gonna go and look for that quote. But yeah. And guys, even if I didn't have someone like that I'm still right. Now enough of your pity parties. Is it easier for me to think like that? Yes. Does that make me any less right? No.
</annoyed>
Also Slow, I recall you telling me she found out you basically had a huge thing for her and kind of made fun of you? Didn't really care? Etc?
No, Margaret would NEVER make fun of me for that. What basically happened is she didn't feel the same way and so felt awkward and I think hoped I would just get over it.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 12, 2012, 07:37:55 PMNo, Margaret would NEVER make fun of me for that. What basically happened is she didn't feel the same way and so felt awkward and I think hoped I would just get over it.
That's sad, but something you can handle I guess. What did you think of that reaction? Can you be normal friends or are your feelings keeping you from a regular friendship?
I don't have feelingd for her anymore, we're really good friends.
That's good to hear ;)
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 12, 2012, 10:44:12 AM^ I know there are people who like me the way I am, but these are not the people I fall in love with usually. And even if I do, the feeling's never mutual.
Point is, most guys I fall in love with, are superficial bitches, only looking at what's on the outside. But never mind, enough of this whining of mine.
That's sad...I guess I've heard this (http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/bering-in-mind/2011/02/14/my-lust-a-valentines-day-confession-and-the-psychology-of-infatuation/) before from this blogger (Jesse Bering) I sometimes read from.
---
I acted in "A Midsummer Night's Dream" back in high school. I played Quince -.- which if I recall correctly, was one of the clowns...
*Actors, XD.
Anyways, I guess I'm sorta looking for a relationship right now but not really trying at all? :P
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 13, 2012, 12:47:48 PM*Actors, XD.
Anyways, I guess I'm sorta looking for a relationship right now but not really trying at all? :P
That's good, since relationships are usually coming when you aren't expecting it at all and when you mostly need it. Things will be well =)
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 13, 2012, 02:11:49 PMThat's good, since relationships are usually coming when you aren't expecting it at all and when you mostly need it. Things will be well =)
Haha, exactly. Just when you stop looking at someone like some kind of object xD
Quote from: Ruto on February 13, 2012, 04:54:56 PMHaha, exactly. Just when you stop looking at someone like some kind of object xD
I still do to be perfectly honest. Maybe that's why *goes in reconsideration*
Im sort of looking but not trying. I just dont have time for a relationship.
Though there are these girls who sit next to me in music... any of them will suffice.
Ok what the hell. Seriously somebody tell me if I'm overreacting.
Told my gf we were going out to dinner tonight. Went to town over the weekend to get a couple things to give as a gift, paying drivers along the way to get me there. Got a pretty thoughtful gift for her based on an inside joke and wrote on a card, all that stuff you're supposed to do. Overall, I'm trying to say I put a lot of work into it.
What do I get?
A chocolate bar.
But not just any chocolate bar- a Hershey's chocolate bar. The thing wasn't even wrapped. She just handed it to me.
Now granted, she did say how wonderful of an evening it was, she apologized that it wasn't as planned out, and she did thank me for it all afterwards. I don't really know what to think. But I know my college student bank account is certainly not happy. Bah. I'm not basing our relationship based on the things we get, but it just seemed very odd.
If you're going to make a big deal over a single instance like this which sure seems like a small slip, then you're doing it wrong.
I guess it just tells me that she didn't care too much. That's all. Didn't put any time into it.
Not that she didn't care enough...more like you cared a little too much. It's not a bad thing, but it's nothing to freak out over.
That does sound pretty sucky though, I'll admit.
My boyfriend doesn't care for Valentine's Day, I've known this. Never expected him to do anything. But last year around this time I was talking about how I had always gotten flowers for the past few years on Valentine's Day. He said he'd send me some the next (this) year. I'm not that surprised he forgot and I don't plan on saying anything because it's not really a big deal.. but it kind of sucks. :/ Maybe I'm just expecting too much. It's not like he doesn't make me feel loved every day otherwise.
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 14, 2012, 06:04:00 PMThat does sound pretty sucky though, I'll admit.
My boyfriend doesn't care for Valentine's Day, I've known this. Never expected him to do anything. But last year around this time I was talking about how I had always gotten flowers for the past few years on Valentine's Day. He said he'd send me some the next (this) year. I'm not that surprised he forgot and I don't plan on saying anything because it's not really a big deal.. but it kind of sucks. :/ Maybe I'm just expecting too much. It's not like he doesn't make me feel loved every day otherwise.
This may be the part I was forgetting.
Rule No. 1 - Expect nothing.
Quote from: spitllama on February 14, 2012, 05:35:10 PMOk what the hell. Seriously somebody tell me if I'm overreacting.
Told my gf we were going out to dinner tonight. Went to town over the weekend to get a couple things to give as a gift, paying drivers along the way to get me there. Got a pretty thoughtful gift for her based on an inside joke and wrote on a card, all that stuff you're supposed to do. Overall, I'm trying to say I put a lot of work into it.
What do I get?
A chocolate bar.
But not just any chocolate bar- a Hershey's chocolate bar. The thing wasn't even wrapped. She just handed it to me.
Now granted, she did say how wonderful of an evening it was, she apologized that it wasn't as planned out, and she did thank me for it all afterwards. I don't really know what to think. But I know my college student bank account is certainly not happy. Bah. I'm not basing our relationship based on the things we get, but it just seemed very odd.
At least you didn't get a potato.
I've never really agreed with that rule. I think the full one is "give 100% and expect nothing in return." A relationship is meant to be mutually beneficial, so aren't there natural expectations that go with that? I can't think of one that's otherwise. Following that rule seems like it'd be like reading a fantasy tale.
Wry you got a potato?
Nope, but getting a potato would be nice. You get a nice symbolic gift and dinner in one nice convenient package!
I gotta admit, getting a potato would be pretty awesome. I don't know why, but it would be. Rather that than some cheap chocolates.
Because you wouldn't expect it. WTF leads to bliss.
As long as it's shaped like a heat, it's appropriate. You can poke holes in it and microwave it...or maybe that's just sweet potatoes.
Quote from: Ruto on February 14, 2012, 06:51:55 PMAs long as it's shaped like a heat, it's appropriate. You can poke holes in it and microwave it...or maybe that's just sweet potatoes.
Haha. It's a pun.
And if it's shaped like a heart it'd be sweet hearts.... or sweet tarts. teeheehee
I now urge you all to buy sweet potatoes, cut them into the shape of a heart, and give them to your significant other.
I've been reading this thread for a while and I've realized that most of you are far too young to be stressing out over these things. Aren't most of you in high school? Most of the issues described here all revolve around one fatal flaw: young people are selfish. We all are, don't try to deny it, it just comes part of the package of being young. It's just as well, I doubt any of you here are in these relationships hoping for it to last for years. If you are then I wish you the best. But since most of you are in high school, do you really think that your bf/gf are thinking totally selflessly. I know I didn't when I dated, and it's clear that neither are most of you; and that's fine. You are at a point in your life where you have very few responsibilities, maturation comes when those responsibilites grow.
I say "expect nothing" because I mean just that, expect nothing. Expectations come with time and habit, which in situations like these amounts to the order of many months, years possibly. If you give your bf/gf a gift out of the kindness of you heart, good for you; but unless they practice the same thing regularly, then they won't reciprocate. That's not a reflection on either of you, but its just a measure of longevity. After a year or so, you may find the two of you going out regularly, exchanging random little trinkets every now and then, and begin treating each other as a constant factor in each other's lives.
For those of you who have your eye on someone special, talk to them. You don't have to waltz up to them and ask them out, just find a common interest and start talking. If you want to date someone, figure out what you are looking for. If you just want to get into a relationship just to "give it a shot", I guarantee that it will not last very long unless you both decide that it is something worth pursuing. If you want to be dating someone for years to come, then figure out if they want the same.
Also, be wary of the distinction between Love and Lust. Both are powerful emotions that often feel the same upon first glance. An easy, but lengthy way to distinguish to two is to wait it out. Feelings of Lust will always give way to the next flavor of the week, Love is a bit stronger and will last longer. Be careful though, Love is not permanent, it is a fleeting emotion that requires constant nurture to keep alive and fresh. Every couple of months or so do something big romantically. Gestures like these are good way to keep things alive and prevent falling into a rut.
Don't get me wrong, when I was in the relationship, I wanted it to last as long as possible.
I think at one point it may have been the same with her, but... she was the one who cut it off.
I honestly think we could make our own season of How I Met Your Mother with the content in this thread.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 14, 2012, 07:21:33 PMI've been reading this thread for a while and I've realized that most of you are far too young to be stressing out over these things. Aren't most of you in high school? Most of the issues described here all revolve around one fatal flaw: young people are selfish. We all are, don't try to deny it, it just comes part of the package of being young. It's just as well, I doubt any of you here are in these relationships hoping for it to last for years. If you are then I wish you the best. But since most of you are in high school, do you really think that your bf/gf are thinking totally selflessly. I know I didn't when I dated, and it's clear that neither are most of you; and that's fine. You are at a point in your life where you have very few responsibilities, maturation comes when those responsibilites grow.
So true! I have learnt the exact same thing, but not through experience. I just know that at our age, relationships don't usually last and people don't take it seriously.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 14, 2012, 07:21:33 PMI say "expect nothing" because I mean just that, expect nothing. Expectations come with time and habit, which in situations like these amounts to the order of many months, years possibly. If you give your bf/gf a gift out of the kindness of you heart, good for you; but unless they practice the same thing regularly, then they won't reciprocate. That's not a reflection on either of you, but its just a measure of longevity. After a year or so, you may find the two of you going out regularly, exchanging random little trinkets every now and then, and begin treating each other as a constant factor in each other's lives.
Good! I'll keep that in mind for the future, especially if it's someone very important to me.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 14, 2012, 07:21:33 PMFor those of you who have your eye on someone special, talk to them. You don't have to waltz up to them and ask them out, just find a common interest and start talking. If you want to date someone, figure out what you are looking for. If you just want to get into a relationship just to "give it a shot", I guarantee that it will not last very long unless you both decide that it is something worth pursuing. If you want to be dating someone for years to come, then figure out if they want the same.
Some more good advice! Thank you! I always have trouble talking to
a particular someone, so this should help me. :D
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 14, 2012, 07:21:33 PMAlso, be wary of the distinction between Love and Lust. Both are powerful emotions that often feel the same upon first glance. An easy, but lengthy way to distinguish to two is to wait it out. Feelings of Lust will always give way to the next flavor of the week, Love is a bit stronger and will last longer. Be careful though, Love is not permanent, it is a fleeting emotion that requires constant nurture to keep alive and fresh. Every couple of months or so do something big romantically. Gestures like these are good way to keep things alive and prevent falling into a rut.
SO TRUE! Some of my friends are idiots and are all into the lust thing. I would never find someone attractive if they didn't have a wonderful and unique personality. :)
Quote from: bash.org#151227 +(10246)- [X]
IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"
Quote from: fingerz on February 14, 2012, 09:00:38 PMSo true! I have learnt the exact same thing, but not through experience. I just know that at our age, relationships don't usually last and people don't take it seriously.
Good! I'll keep that in mind for the future, especially if it's someone very important to me.
Some more good advice! Thank you! I always have trouble talking to a particular someone, so this should help me. :D
SO TRUE! Some of my friends are idiots and are all into the lust thing. I would never find someone attractive if they didn't have a wonderful and unique personality. :)
Same, I had this conversation with roz recently: music >>>>> sex
Quote from: Wrydryn on February 14, 2012, 08:18:50 PMI honestly think we could make our own season of How I Met Your Mother with the content in this thread.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Maestro, you want to become my psychiatrist? I'm sure you have more stuff to tell than she does.
And your potato discussion is just hilarious, I'm sorry. If someone would give me a potato, I'd just feel insulted. Yes, I'm aware of my nose being oversized.
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 15, 2012, 08:00:27 AMMaestro, you want to become my psychiatrist? I'm sure you have more stuff to tell than she does.
Gee. Thanks.
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 15, 2012, 12:44:06 PMGee. Thanks.
Nawh, I didn't mean you sweetie, I meant my psychiatrist, who is female.
Sorry for any psychological harm done =*(
GUYS.
GUYS. WE HAVE TO START GIVING OUT POTATOES TO PEOPLE.
How much do they cost, anyways? And what would we package them in? XD
^Great idea!
A pound of potatoes costs approx 1,50 euros over here. We should package them in stuffed ninsheetmusic teddy bears.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 15, 2012, 02:16:56 PMGUYS.
GUYS. WE HAVE TO START GIVING OUT POTATOES TO PEOPLE.
How much do they cost, anyways? And what would we package them in? XD
Go to Costco.
Get the 25 pound bag of Idaho Russets (the worst and cheapest) for like 6 dollars. and send send send.
Quote from: JaMaHa on February 15, 2012, 12:32:36 AMQuote from: bash.org#151227 +(10246)- [X]
IronChef Foicite: well, there's a lot of reasons
IronChef Foicite: i mean, roses only last like a couple weeks
IronChef Foicite: and that's if you leave them in water
IronChef Foicite: and they really only exist to be pretty
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying
IronChef Foicite: "my love for you is transitory and based solely on your appearance"
IronChef Foicite: but a potato!
IronChef Foicite: potatos last for fucking ever, man
IronChef Foicite: in fact, not only will they not rot, they actually grow shit even if you just leave them in the sack
IronChef Foicite: that part alone makes it a good symbol
IronChef Foicite: but there's more!
IronChef Foicite: there are so many ways to enjoy a potato! you can even make a battery with it!
IronChef Foicite: and that's like saying "i have many ways in which I show my love for you"
IronChef Foicite: and potatos may be ugly, but they're still awesome
IronChef Foicite: so that's like saying "it doesn't matter at all what you look like, I'll still love you"
Glad to see someone knows the source!
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 15, 2012, 05:39:37 AMCHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
And it will be LEGEND- wait for it.... -DARY!
Maybe this can be the relationship talk show you two were going to have?
Except better.
Quote from: Wrydryn on February 15, 2012, 04:54:23 PMAnd it will be LEGEND- wait for it.... -DARY!
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaave you met Whirr?
Quote from: GreekGeek on February 15, 2012, 08:00:27 AMMaestro, you want to become my psychiatrist? I'm sure you have more stuff to tell than she does.
And your potato discussion is just hilarious, I'm sorry. If someone would give me a potato, I'd just feel insulted. Yes, I'm aware of my nose being oversized.
I would, by my rates go up exponentially after the 6th hour, starting $20 per hour.
^Fraiser Crane, Radio Psychologist.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 15, 2012, 06:53:11 PMI would, by my rates go up exponentially after the 6th hour, starting $20 per hour.
*Asks the furniture salesman for free while lying down in one of the show room sofas*
1) I just realized I have been on a date...2 years later >__>
2) Don't really want to say much more about stuff right now about this topic other than "I complain a lot"
Okay...I'm gonna need some advice...
I have a good friend at work, whom I've known for a couple years now. Working with her makes working there really fun-It can really turn around a bad day just seeing her smile as she walks in. We've only really been buddies at work since she's been living with her bf for a few years now, and I was cool with that. He was a cool guy to hang out with-and really funny too! Of course, I've always seemed to have a bit of a crush on her.(Lol, I'm in high school again!)However, I'd never tried to do anything about, it since they made such a great couple. Today on her break he broke up with her. Nobody saw it coming. I spent the last three hours there comforting her, but they made me leave because of our policy on overtime.(they literally make you leave the store since you're in uniform :<) I told her to call/text me if she needed anything.
What should I do? I can't stand to see her like this...
Well, if I was in this situation...
I'd call her in the morning/text her saying "Good Morning! How are you feeling! Know that I'm here for you :D". Being positive, supportive and comforting helps. Let her do what she wants to do and go along with it (unless it's detrimental to recovery). Make her a cake or cookies or some sort of comfort food! Offer assistance or something. Take her out to do something fun (if you do stuff outside work)... For example, I took one of my friends to one of our outdoor malls here and then took her to CPK and had an enjoyable time. It was a "get your mind off him and spend time with your best friend" situation. Even going out jogging together is a great way to get her mind off it... especially if it's a nice day!
Thanks, I'll do that. It's just that I don't know where she's going to be staying-they moved here from michigan for her bf's job, so I doubt she has any family out here. I'd let her stay with me, but unfortunatly I'm still at home and won't be moving out until august:( (and my family would'nt just let her stay with us+it would be weird lol.).
Consolidation is good, but don't give the impression that you're trying to flip it around so that the two of you can start dating. Beware the friend zone.
Quote from: Olimar12345 on February 17, 2012, 09:48:19 PMOkay...I'm gonna need some advice...
This is the best place to get advice, but maybe not the best place for good advice. XD
A little bit joking about that, but anyways, you need to find a balance between comforting her and the friend zone. D:
Thanks, guys. It means alot. I'll try my best.
No but really, if it looks like you're setting yourself up for a relationship with her this soon, it'll look really bad.
At the same time, opportunities can disappear quickly and may never show themselves again.
But yeah, at least try to cheer her up, but don't over-exert it.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 15, 2012, 04:08:08 AMSame, I had this conversation with roz recently: music >>>>> sex
<3333333333
Also
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg710.imageshack.us%2Fimg710%2F4769%2Frelationshipsri.jpg&hash=7327d76d66be23b0d64239e72945e5f940c974ce)
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 17, 2012, 11:12:41 PMBut yeah, at least try to cheer her up, but don't over-exert it.
Definitely. I'm honestly more concerned for her right now than anything. But later down the road if the opportunity comes I might try a relationship with her.
I agree with all that has been said before. Try to comfort her, but try to let her make the decisions, so she'll know you're there for her. And watch out not to become too close in a physical way. She'll probably be a bit suspicious when it comes to men, when she has just been let down by her bf, and she'll maybe overreact when she gets the idea you're trying to hit on her. Thing is, if she has feelings for you, they will always come out in the end. So don't worry if she starts dating again and maybe even picks up a new bf, trying to forget what happened. Be there for her as her comforting, sweet friend, but watch out being friend zoned.
Hope this makes sense. Good luck ;)
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 17, 2012, 11:12:41 PMBut yeah, at least try to cheer her up, but don't over-exert it, if you know what I mean.
*fix'd
Quote from: Roz~ on February 17, 2012, 11:17:25 PM(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg710.imageshack.us%2Fimg710%2F4769%2Frelationshipsri.jpg&hash=7327d76d66be23b0d64239e72945e5f940c974ce)
Heh. That guy..
Jamaha: So, uh, would you like to go out for a coffee?
Girl: Sure! (OMG YES)
Girl: But, you know, as friends. (wait, what)
Girl: I have a boyfriend. (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--)
MOST middle school relationships never work out... I've seen too many.
Lol it's middle school.
Also good to see you took down your douchebag-ish thread saying how great you are for a thirteen year old.
E: Nope, nvm. It's just moved.
Quote from: insaneintherain on February 24, 2012, 01:44:47 PMALL middle school relationships never work out... I've seen too many.
*fixed
Middle School relationships are a joke.
How I Imagine School Relationships, Middle School in Particular:
"Hey there, girl, whadya say about meeting me at the monkey bars so I can buy you some ice cream and apple juice!!!!!!!!!"
"omg youre my prince in shining armour. of course!!!!!!!!!"
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on February 24, 2012, 02:11:08 PMMiddle School relationships are a joke.
I agree. -.- Admittedly I thought something was wrong with me back then because no guys liked me. But I'm glad I never got into anything back then.
I repeat: IT'S MIDDLE SCHOOL XD
Quote from: Mashi on February 24, 2012, 04:32:39 PMHow I Imagine School Relationships, Middle School in Particular:
"Hey there, girl, whadya say about meeting me at the monkey bars so I can buy you some ice cream and apple juice!!!!!!!!!"
"omg youre my prince in shining armour. of course!!!!!!!!!"
This made my day. Beyond belief. I love you so much Mashi, I forgive you for not being very active in my game.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on February 24, 2012, 02:11:08 PM*fixed
Middle School in general is a joke.
*Fixed.
Quote from: JaMaHa on February 24, 2012, 01:10:14 PMJamaha: So, uh, would you like to go out for a coffee?
Girl: Sure! (OMG YES)
Girl: But, you know, as friends. (wait, what)
Girl: I have a boyfriend. (NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO--)
At least you tried xD I haven't even gotten to that.
On the topic of Mashi's middle school dating thing..
I wrote an essay on the Amish and learned some things. Found out the Amish can date a lot like typical folk (more "courting"-ish) and young men will usually drive their carriages up to their possible date.
"Oh hey there pretty lady wanna ride in my buggy?"
How could you say no to that?
Quote from: Ruto on February 24, 2012, 08:05:51 PMAt least you tried xD I haven't even gotten to that.
I know! Instead of "Damn, I just got rejected" I was like "Damn, I just asked a girl out."
How about those elementary school relationships?
It was so strange seeing someone in a relationship that long ago and in that grade.
Quote from: JaMaHa on February 25, 2012, 02:08:08 AMI know! Instead of "Damn, I just got rejected" I was like "Damn, I just asked a girl out."
lol, I've had that feeling before.
Quote from: JaMaHa on February 25, 2012, 02:08:08 AMI know! Instead of "Damn, I just got rejected" I was like "Damn, I just asked a girl out."
It would be a real rejection if she said no :P
I know, not a real rejection. Still, same result.
Quote from: Wrydryn on February 25, 2012, 07:24:49 AMHow about those elementary school relationships?
It was so strange seeing someone in a relationship that long ago and in that grade.
Oh my fucking god. The stories I could tell you.
This one bitch I was friends with in 2nd grade had her 'boyfriend' tell me to stay away from her. -_-
Question: When you catch your ex staring at you (a lot) and then she looks away when you catch her, what does that mean?
I found the right thread:P
I've been that person so I would know. It either means you have a bat in the cave and she doesn't want to embarrass you, or, more likely, even though you broke up, she still likes you and can't take her eyes off you, but she is too afraid to confront her feelings and talk to you. Trust me, been there, done that, and if you tell her you are aware of it, and you don't want to get back together, she'll be crushed. I guess either ignore it, or if you do tell her, don't be a douche and play the still-friends card unless you really mean it. Though I'm not an expert on love, so you may want a second opinion.
It depends on the reason you broke up in the first place. Emotions are usually cyclical, with love often falring up every now and then a subsiding after a while, this is usually what happens when people say they've fallen out of love. It's not that you stopped loving each other, its just that those feelings aren't as strong at the moment. Love needs to be built up in relationships, otherwise it get stagnant and loses its hold on you. And it is possible to care for someone else without having a strong feeling as love to back it up.
If your break up was something along these lines then most likely her feelings for you are flaring up again, and possibly the same for you as well.
If it was less amiable, then she might be either be reconsidering (doubtful) or just reminiscing.
She dumped me because we're going to different high schools and wanted to make it easier on the both of us-.- (I call BS)
Anytime distance becomes a factor in a relationship, it makes it that much harder for it to work. Not only do you get to see each other less, but now trust becomes a bigger issue than it every was. It's one thing to trust your partner if their down the street, or even across the city; much less so across an entire state. Given you two don't have your means of transportation, going to two separate schools might as well be like you two are living in different states. The temptation alone proves to be too much for some people, and as such want to remove the temptation altogether, which usually means ending the long distance relationship.
Chances are she still likes you, but doesn't want to hurt you if she were to stray while you two were apart. Having a physical presence is very important in a relationship.
My girlfriend says we have sex too much and I don't take the relationship seriously.
Stupid.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmedia.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_m3i28jOa6Z1qg9sv2.jpg&hash=52493368e06e4c32b7fdcfb00e82e294121882e9)
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg20.imageshack.us%2Fimg20%2F7112%2F57613210151681092850092.jpg&hash=2e914583aca2315e09e40a18460bf00bf2af7c1b)
Quote from: Harvest on May 14, 2012, 08:57:59 PMMy girlfriend says we have sex too much and I don't take the relationship seriously.
Stupid.
That's just crazy.
TMI -.-
Also, Dude should fix that link. I'm curious about what it is.
What link?
http://img20.imageshack.us/img20/7112/57613210151681092850092.jpg
???
Quote from: Harvest on May 14, 2012, 08:57:59 PMMy girlfriend says we have sex too much and I don't take the relationship seriously.
Stupid.
TMI. There are more younger people on this website than you think
Quote from: FluteNinja on May 15, 2012, 05:27:15 PMTMI. There are more younger people on this website than you think
It's not THAT bad compared to some other things I've seen. *Looks at Dude* :P
Should I be afraid? :-[
Quote from: FluteNinja on May 15, 2012, 05:27:15 PMTMI. There are more younger people on this website than you think
You youngin's shouldn't be on threads titled "Relationships" anyway *sits on a rocking chair*
Touche
Just a question for you guys... is it weird to date someone with the same name as a sibling?
Thing is, one of my friends is awesome and I'd love to ask her out. She's funny, smart, cute, amazing musician, overall awesome. And she has the same name as my sister. It just seems to me like it'd be kind of...strange. Thoughts?
It's only strange if you believe it is. If you feel strongly enough for her, then you'll get over it rather quickly, since you'll be able to distinguish the two. It might make family dinners a little akward at first, but at the end of the day it really doen't matter.
If it does bug you that much, then your feelings for her just aren't strong enough to reconcile that fact. That or there are some other issues that need to be worked out.
What Maestro said. However your relationship will be the butt of numerous jokes.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on May 15, 2012, 08:41:46 PMJust a question for you guys... is it weird to date someone with the same name as a sibling?
Thing is, one of my friends is awesome and I'd love to ask her out. She's funny, smart, cute, amazing musician, overall awesome. And she has the same name as my sister. It just seems to me like it'd be kind of...strange. Thoughts?
That shouldn't even be a factor in your relationship. Go for it.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on May 15, 2012, 08:41:46 PMJust a question for you guys... is it weird to date someone with the same name as a sibling?
Thing is, one of my friends is awesome and I'd love to ask her out. She's funny, smart, cute, amazing musician, overall awesome. And she has the same name as my sister. It just seems to me like it'd be kind of...strange. Thoughts?
I would go for it.
Come up with a nickname if it bothers you that much? But it's not like you're thinking of your sister while talking to her :p
Quote from: Ruto on May 16, 2012, 07:12:30 AMCome up with a nickname if it bothers you that much? But it's not like you're thinking of your sister while talking to her :p
It's not much of a big deal. But if your really find it awkward, just give her a nickname (only if she likes it) or just give your sister a nickname.
or just stop speaking to your sister.But I never bother with relationships
yet.
Quote from: Ruto on May 15, 2012, 05:26:45 PMhttp://img20.imageshack.us/img20/7112/57613210151681092850092.jpg
???
What about it? The image is displayed fine on my computer.
Yep same, I blame China
The Great Firewall Strikes Again!
Pretty sure she's in HK right now so there shouldn't a problem... but oh well
Lol maybe it's imageshack being stupid here. And yes, I'm in HK...
Cool! ..don't mean to go off topic, but how is it in HK?
Haven't really been sightseeing so much, it's mostly paperwork so far and looking around malls. They're all starting to look the same...
Anyway a bit more on topic is that the guys here are a bit of a disappointment XD Everyone has the same glasses, skin problems (probably from the heat and not washing their face enough) and wear the same shirt and/or tie. A shower would help them a lot...
This is the only place I've been to where everyone spends the entire time staring at their phones on the train or train platform and not even look up. So antisocial xD So they shouldn't complain about being single...the don't seem to want attention ::)
lol, I had a feeling that people in HK would be glued to their cellphones. xD So yeah, sorry China! we have no worries about your antisocial-ness! :) (for a second, when you all were saying "HK", I thought you meant.. hello kitty xD)
Haha, it's actually completely different in China...the girls really take the time to make themselves look good and the guys are a lot more social despite having phones and stuff. I went to a park once and there were all these nerdy* photographers just walking around asking girls if they could take their picture. Several guys asked me too lol XD
*by Chinese standards
Asians boys/men do tend to be closer to one another (by prior experience/Asian cultures, not by racism ways). ..but never knew about the photo taking stuff. xD
You clearly have never seen Asian tourist groups.
Asian countries are generally constituted of collectivist countries, so I would imagine that whatever Asian tourist groups you may be referring to may be aberrant if they weren't group-oriented. Not sure about what you're referring to when you say that, but even something such as bickering among each other may reflect a degree of interdependence, considering that they're able to bicker with each other as a family would. But again, I'm not sure what you're implying when you refer to the tourist groups, so...!
Photos, everywhere
When I was in Rome, in front of the Basilica Saint Mary Maggiore, two FULL busses of Azn tour groups let out and 2 minutes later, I swear each tourist (and all of them had cameras) had taken AT LEAST 20 photos each...
Not to mention they mobbed the church (which kind of pissed off the priests a bit, as they were trying to get Confessions done)... it was quite a sight.
And this is totally the stereotype
Quote from: DrP on May 16, 2012, 11:21:04 PMNot to mention they mobbed the church (which kind of pissed off the priests a bit, as they were trying to get Confessions done)... it was quite a sight.
Wish i'd seen that.
You see, this isn't actually off topic because we are simply conversing the relationships of asian tourists with the culture which they are visiting.
^lol I was just about to say we were getting off topic
... I sorta like my 8 year old neighbor...
Quote from: Raymondbl on May 17, 2012, 04:18:25 PM... I sorta like my 8 year old neighbor...
<Aamir refrians from any comment on what read in the above comment> ... </Aamir refrains from any comment on what he read in the above comment>
Quote from: Raymondbl on May 17, 2012, 04:18:25 PM... I sorta like my 8 year old neighbor...
Pedobear approves.
^ *exactly what Aamir did not want to say, but thanks Dude for pointing that out
No, it's not pedophilia, it's just she's cute and pretty, and my feelings aren't the romantic type. Do ya get what I mean? :\
.... sort of....
I just feel that she's really cute and I should protect her/make her happy. Brotherly/protective feelings?
....Sure, I guess so. If you don't want anyone to bother her (including yourself), it's not making you PB. :)
*cough*
One of my friends just asked a girl out by saying "Excuse me, I couldn't help but notice that you have a very good hip structure for birthing children, would you like to go on a date?"
Obviously, she said yes.
^This. Has to be the best pick-up line I've ever heard.
Complimenting a girl's boobs subtly... "YOUR kids will never go hungry"
My father is about 10 years older than my mother. That means that my mother wasn't even born when my father was in 5th Grade!
In other words, simply because a person is somewhat younger than you doesn't mean that love between the two isn't possible. Of course, I'm not saying that adults should be dating 8 year olds, but the possibility of marrying them when they're older is certainly possible!
But acting as an older brother to a girl is super cute and you should totes do that Raymondbl.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 17, 2012, 05:41:23 PMComplimenting a girl's boobs subtly... "YOUR kids will never go hungry"
Oh God XD
It doesn't work for everyone...Quote from: Raymondbl on May 17, 2012, 04:40:13 PMI just feel that she's really cute and I should protect her/make her happy. Brotherly/protective feelings?
xDDDDDD if you say so.
Quote from: Mashi on May 17, 2012, 05:50:09 PMIn other words, simply because a person is somewhat younger than you doesn't mean that love between the two isn't possible. Of course, I'm not saying that adults should be dating 8 year olds, but the possibility of marrying them when they're older is certainly possible!
Lol I remember hearing in music class that Robert Schumann when he was 18 met Clara Wieck when she was 9 (he was taking lessons from her dad). They got married xD It doesn't get weirder than that...
Actually....my dad is 13 years older than my mom so age difference doesn't matter--after a certain point, that is. While you're 13 and she's 8, no. She hasn't even started...developing...yet and you've still got some years ahead of you as well. But when you're like 25 and she's 20? I don't think there's a big deal.
My moms 7 years older than my father. But yeah, I've never been asked out by a cheesy pick up line, sadly.
^Me neither :(
It seems impossible to find a guy with common sense these days, I don't know why I bother -.-
/rant
All most of us guys here have common sense; we're born with it.
nowadays, common sense is an oxymoron.
Last night I was talking to my boyfriend and was rather impressed by how well he could read me. Idunno, it's just weird. I've always thought about how I want someone who really knows me, now I've got someone that knows me better than I do. Just thinking out loud, sort of.
Quote from: ETFROXX on May 18, 2012, 11:43:47 AMLast night I was talking to my boyfriend and was rather impressed by how well he could read me. Idunno, it's just weird. I've always thought about how I want someone who really knows me, now I've got someone that knows me better than I do. Just thinking out loud, sort of.
(i'm guessing) That's the start of eternal relationship.
It's not, reading someone does not mean a good relationship, it just means good people skills (in a sense).
I wonder if UGC has an relationships... xD
I have, and I'm great at reading people, doesn't make for a good relationship on its own at the end of the day.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on May 18, 2012, 01:03:26 PMI have, and I'm great at reading people, doesn't make for a good relationship on its own at the end of the day.
This is true ;P
I'd say I'm fairly good at reading people too. It's great for picking someone for a relationship.
Very true. I have a horrible habit of toying with people who have an interest. :P
Quote from: Maestro Aamir on May 18, 2012, 01:00:47 PMI wonder if UGC has an relationships... xD
That made me LOL surprisingly hard.
Something huge may have changed...
I'll let you guys know if it did!
I'm still the same oblivious person...Doesn't look like that will change anytime soon xD
So can anyone tell me if it's some weird psychological thing?
Hahahaha! No, it's to do with reading emotions. I'm (usually) very good at reading people's body language and most of the time I can pick up the subtle hints. It's a skill, that's all. :P
Actually it's usually fairly blatantly obvious when someone wants to go out with you, it's a matter of acting.
Really? I usually realize things like that too late (like years too late sometimes-.-)...but I'm not so clueless about other things xD
Quote from: Ruto on May 24, 2012, 07:04:33 PMReally? I usually realize things like that too late (like years too late sometimes-.-)...but I'm not so clueless about other things xD
O_O yeah.
^Has happened to me. Actually, I knew she was totally in to me(Dropping "subtle" hints like, "I love you," and scooting extra close to me) But I wimped out, and lost my chance. Oh me.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on May 24, 2012, 07:18:47 PMDropping subtle hints like, "I love you,"
Okay...so, um. Am I the only one whose definition of "subtle" doesn't exactly fit here?
Yeah, that's really not subtle.
Keep forgetting sarcasm does not work on internet. should fix that
Oh.
Let me just recalibrate my sarcasm radar. *beep*
Guess the damn thing was broken again.
Are you ignoring all those obvious signs or do you just think they're joking?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 24, 2012, 04:09:52 PMActually it's usually fairly blatantly obvious when someone wants to go out with you, it's a matter of acting.
Unless you're the kind of person that isn't even making eye contact with that person. o.o
Well it's mostly because she knows I like her and so just avoid her, and even if I did I'm fairly certain she's not allowed to date anyone.
'Not allowed to date'
Yahhh I used to hear that all the time xD. 'Not until you're 25' they said...in reality they're getting nervous since I seem to be taking their advice seriously.
The eye contact thing is interesting. I've been told that I don't make a lot of eye contact. But when I did, I guessed correctly what fat sis was going to pick in a game of rock paper scissors xD. Maybe I should do it more and make everyone else the nervous ones.
You're suppressing your natural psychic abilities.... O:
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on May 25, 2012, 08:54:27 AMYou're suppressing your natural psychic abilities.... O:
Hmm well I was right about a few things but that doesn't make me psychic lol. The rock paper scissors was an interesting example. I made eye contact with her for a second and something in my head just screamed to me about what she was going to pick o__O
I had 1/3 of a chance of getting it right without any of that, so it wasn't something really far out that it couldn't have been pure luck.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on May 25, 2012, 08:54:27 AMYou're suppressing your natural psychic abilities.... O:
I agree, Ruto...you're holding yourself back!
Haha, well let's not jump to conclusions...I think at least one person's had something similar happen. I don't think studies of ESP have been done (or accepted), you just hear some random instances of it happen. I have a friend who told me her grandma went to a psychic, who said that she'd die with only one of her children beside her in a foreign country. The grandma was obviously freaked out, but it came true :/ (The grandma had to flee the country soon after because of war, and only one of her kids managed to leave the country too) o__o I don't know if that's too vague to be random.
I can't decide if it's cute or annoying that anytime I say 'I wanna know!' my boyfriend says
can you show me?
what?
somethings familiar about the strangers like me
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fweknowmemes.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2012%2F03%2Foh-you-dog.jpg&hash=19de0289b88e5244b159ff718e7e528e675e4ed0)
Oh god every time I see that dog...
WHY IS IT SO AMUSING.
Quote from: ETFROXX on May 27, 2012, 06:20:49 PMI can't decide if it's cute or annoying that anytime I say 'I wanna know!' my boyfriend says
can you show me?
what?
somethings familiar about the strangers like me
HAHA! That's hilarious! You do know that line is from a song in Tarzan, right? That guy is a keeper.
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on May 28, 2012, 12:12:59 PMHAHA! That's hilarious! You do know that line is from a song in Tarzan, right?
...no shit. also ETF's a disney FANATIC.
Just making sure, but how in the metric hell was I supposed to know that?
All of her posts everywhere
:3
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on May 28, 2012, 06:48:18 PMJust making sure, but how in the metric hell was I supposed to know that?
I didn't know hell could be measured in metric units... :P
Sheikah was slyly making a joke about Americans' knowledge of the metric system.
I so AMERICAN I didn't even realize he used the word metric in that sentence until fingerz pointed it out
I love metric units! They actually make sense!
I don't get why Aussie Nintendo doesn't change Pokemon height/weight back to metric units like the Japanese games... What the hell is 9 lbs and 3 foot 7??? :(
Quote from: fingerz on May 30, 2012, 02:47:50 PMWhat the hell is 9 lbs and 3 foot 7??? :(
he he he, I know what those are!
That's why I love playing the Japanese games and reading 1.75 m and 128 kg. Makes so much more sense... :D
Not to us. XD because we have nothing to compare that to to realize how much that actually is.
Ohh well it's not like the Pokemon weights make much sense :P Even if Wailord was filled with air, it wouldn't weigh 877lb being 47 ft tall...
Quote from: fingerz on May 30, 2012, 02:47:50 PMI love metric units! They actually make sense!
I don't get why Aussie Nintendo doesn't change Pokemon height/weight back to metric units like the Japanese games... What the hell is 9 lbs and 3 foot 7??? :(
To go to kg, divide lbs by 2.2
To go from feet to meters is harder: take the amount of feet, multiply by 12. Then add to the inches next to the 7. THEN multiply by 2.54 and then you're in centimeters
...
I hate our measurements system.
Couldn't you just multiply by 3.2 for feet to meters?
EDIT: Oh, inches. Fractions are your friends!
Girls seem to dislike me.
Haha girls like me usually (not usually in a romantic way) but it's totally my fault I'm not in a relationship.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 30, 2012, 05:11:18 PMHaha girls like me usually (not usually in a romantic way) but it's totally my fault I'm not in a relationship.
I have tons of friends who are girls. Just none who would actually go out with me.
Quote from: shadowkirby on May 30, 2012, 05:14:22 PMI have tons of friends who are girls. Just none who would actually go out with me.
^here we go. That's pretty much me.
Quote from: shadowkirby on May 30, 2012, 05:14:22 PMI have tons of friends who are girls. Just none who would actually go out with me.
Kind of the same here, but in reverse -.-
^Proof that being friend zoned isn't gender-specific! D:
Actually for me it's the fear that the attempt of asking will just mess up a potential friendship. :/
^This.
^Very true. I don't see anyone in my friendship group like that anymore though.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on May 30, 2012, 08:32:35 PMActually for me it's the fear that the attempt of asking will just mess up a potential friendship. :/
I would ask her out. If they ruin the friendship because of that then she's not very smart.
It's most definitely not that simple.
^what Kefka said
That annoying guy from school messaged me again, asking me how I was and whether I was in HK (I think? Weird grammar)...I think I know where this is going, but I don't know what to say...HELP!!!
I'm not really interested in any of this business right now -.-
What is HK?
If he tries to take things further than you want them to go(like, say, being friends) then just be all Nawthx kbai. Be dismissive, but don't be rude or mean while doing it.
HK = Hong Kong
It's the same guy that was annoying me during the field trip, the one who kept whining to me about how to do this assignment that he was too lazy to do himself (his own words) and how he thinks I should go shopping, be more feminine and dress better -.-
Bring friends seem to be pushing it right now -.-
why do you allow him to correspond with you
^this
You should just tell him he's annoying imho.
Quote from: Ruto on June 02, 2012, 07:50:54 AMBring friends seem to be pushing it right now -.-
Quite. After that little description of him, forget politeness and just tell him to gtfo. Also, what form of trickery allowed him to get your number in the first place?
He emailed me actually...he might have tried calling while I was away, but I wouldn't pick up in any case. I just don't have the time/energy for this sorta thing.
Just went through a breakup, but then arranged "Still Alive" and it made me feel all happy inside, squashing the remains of love. MWAHAHA 8)
Sorry to hear that. Go find and listen to "A Dark Knight" from The Dark Knight soundtrack. It will totally make sense with what you're feeling. Also no cheating, listen to all 16 minutes. It's the most beautiful thing ever and will enhance your feelings on the situation.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on June 04, 2012, 06:59:46 PMSorry to hear that. Go find and listen to "A Dark Knight" from The Dark Knight soundtrack. It will totally make sense with what you're feeling. Also no cheating, listen to all 16 minutes. It's the most beautiful thing ever and will enhance your feelings on the situation.
Don't be sorry, it was actually a good thing. I realized I was in love with the "old her", not the "current her". It's a thing I often slip in to.
Single.
Quote from: ETFROXX on June 09, 2012, 01:18:01 PMSingle.
If it was a good break-up: *High Five* :)
If it was a bad break-up: *Consolation High Five* :(
Quote from: ETFROXX on June 09, 2012, 01:18:01 PMSingle.
You aren't alone. (I just realized the irony in that statement.) I have never been, nor do I want to be (at the moment), in a relationship.
Wow how original
I'm struggling to understand that. . . Did somebody already say that here? This is literally the second time I've been on this thread.
I think that's 95% of people on this forum. Because 95% of people are LIARS.
Liars about what?
Nah I just meant lots of other people including several on here talk and think like that. MaestroUGC in particular said something exactly like that.
Lol, so I'm not alone in the world!
Guys help I think I may have asked someone ouy
It's not that I choose to be single just for the sake of it, nor for a lack of caring. I just haven't found someone with whom I'd be willing to take that leap. I realize that sounds cliche, but I don't want to spend the energy building a relationship that I know will not be long term, to the order of years.
Also ETF, sorry to hear that, did you care for him deeply?
@shadow, ok, what's the issue?
I've never had a girlfriend before and I don't know what to dooooo
Nobody ever knows what to do, my advice would be to take it one day at a time.
Do you like this person at least?
Yes, considering I DID ask her out...
Well then enjoy your date. There's no need to panic over nothing, at the very least, even if this doesn't develop into a relationship at least you two will have had a good time.
The thing is, people want a long term relationship but they also realize that's not very likely at a younger age. :P
@SFK and Maestro
Quote from: MaestroUGC on June 11, 2012, 01:46:48 PMIt's not that I choose to be single just for the sake of it, nor for a lack of caring. I just haven't found someone with whom I'd be willing to take that leap. I realize that sounds cliche, but I don't want to spend the energy building a relationship that I know will not be long term, to the order of years.
I'd like the attention but it sounds like a lot of work. Plus there's no way to tell if it's going to be rewarding enough at the end, unlike a degree or job. Right now it seems like my classmates (most are recent graduates) have one or the other, but not both [a relationship and a career]. At this point, I don't really think a guy is worth a PhD -.-
I was just talking to my dad about what my plans were in the next few years and he actually congratulated me (!) for not being so attached to anyone XDDD He pointed out how unhappy he was with my sisters' choices of guys and their general 'now that I have a guy I can stop being ambitious' attitude that comes from it. Which makes it impossible for them to get further degrees or even promotions. He also added that there's plenty of time to get a good person (aka 'someone he'd approve of') since you'd usually see the ones with a good education later on.
Quote from: Ruto on June 11, 2012, 07:39:43 PMAt this point, I don't really think a guy is worth a PhD -.-
..oh. I guess you're right.
Well alright then, the Status Quo really is God.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on June 12, 2012, 06:40:17 AMWell alright then, the Status Quo really is God.
Nah.
Were you hoping to pick me up on the rebound, Dude?
Maaaaybe.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on June 11, 2012, 07:19:29 PMThe thing is, people want a long term relationship but they also realize that's not very likely at a younger age. :P
^Hell Yeah.
What do you do if you like a lot of girls, but none of them strongly enough to really make a decision on who to go for?
Wait a while, it's probably just temporary feelings of lust more so than any strong feelings. After a while stronger feelings will persist while anything else will subside.
Quote from: insaneintherain on June 23, 2012, 11:27:36 AMWhat do you do if you like a lot of girls, but none of them strongly enough to really make a decision on who to go for?
You stop being such a little whore.What Maestro said.
Silly ETF, that only applies if he goes for all of them, or at least more than one.
Yeah, I like more than one girl...a lot of people do
That's perfectly natural, it's all part of the human condition.
Quote from: ETFROXX on June 23, 2012, 12:50:51 PMYou stop being such a little whore.
What Maestro said.
...
Don't worry, you'll eventually get used to our sense of humor. XD
:-D I actually am, but I was just being ironic. I think reading the modernized version of the creation story (by one of the guys on the site with a hood on his profile pic) really helped. xD
Got it narrowed down to one! And I think it's mutual :-)
Oh goodness. SFK, stop corrupting the children.
I like several girls, but have an order of preference. I know what I want.
Quote from: insaneintherain on June 24, 2012, 07:08:05 AM:-D I actually am, but I was just being ironic. I think reading the modernized version of the creation story (by one of the guys on the site with a hood on his profile pic) really helped. xD
I hear that guy is totally awesome.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on June 24, 2012, 09:16:12 AMOh goodness. SFK, stop corrupting the children.
NEVER.
Girlfriend wants to marry me and have my children.
I'd like to go back in time to my 16 year old self and tell him someone will want those things from him in a few years and watch his head explode.
*claps*
Congrats Harvest. Are you going to go through with it?
Well, yes, but we have to wait a few years considering university and stuff...I'd like a degree and a job first.
Quote from: Harvest on June 25, 2012, 09:37:38 PMWell, yes, but we have to wait a few years considering university and stuff...I'd like a degree and a job first.
Yeah, having stable income is a good idea when considering having teh babies.
Quote from: Shadoninja on June 25, 2012, 09:40:08 PMYeah, having stable income is a good idea when considering having teh babies.
I read somewhere that the average cost of raising a child over the course of years 1-18 costs roughly 285k. It's a very rough estimate, and almost impossible to calculate accurately.
Psh you guys worry too much. Babies just need a rug for sleep, a toilet, and some raisins right?
Quote from: spitllama on June 25, 2012, 10:24:43 PMPsh you guys worry too much. Babies just need a rug for sleep, a toilet, and some raisins right?
...I'm calling CPS xD
Well anyway I can't think of a worse time for this kind of decision to be made. It's impossible to raise an infant while still in school. Also doubt it's that easy to just find a job and be financially stable that soon after.
Somebody once told me there is no "good time" to have children. If you sit around and wait for the circumstances that will allow you to raise a child, you'll be waiting either forever, or until the option is gone. Just don't choose to have kids while you can't spend time to raise them (school).
Quote from: MaestroUGC on June 26, 2012, 12:06:54 AMJust don't choose to have kids while you can't spend time to raise them (school).
Yup. I dunno where my classmate would find time to do anything if her mom/cousins didn't help her by babysitting her 1 year old...
That's awesome Harvest :)
Quote from: Ruto on June 25, 2012, 11:59:24 PM...I'm calling CPS xD
Well anyway I can't think of a worse time for this kind of decision to be made. It's impossible to raise an infant while still in school. Also doubt it's that easy to just find a job and be financially stable that soon after.
This isn't happening right now. We have both agreed that it needs to happen at some point. After school at least.
^Bf has been telling me that for a while. The fun part is I don't want kids, and he wants at least 3-4. We'll see who wins in the end I guess.
^Since he's not the one that's going to have them, it's pretty obvious xD
Quote from: Ruto on June 27, 2012, 10:43:08 PM^Since he's not the one that's going to have them, it's pretty obvious xD
There's always adoption. Which imo is the better option for our current circumstances.
You might want to be careful around this subject, this is an issue that most won't concede on either side of the argument. While yes, one of you may yeild later, but often times just knowing your partner doesn't want the same life goals you do is enough to start questioning the future of the relationship.
We're all young here, and while most of us have a pretty good idea of what we want out of life, just don't bank on everything turning out the way you hoped.
Quote from: Roz~ on June 27, 2012, 09:19:07 PM^Bf has been telling me that for a while. The fun part is I don't want kids, and he wants at least 3-4. We'll see who wins in the end I guess.
What Roz wants: (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi923.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fad71%2FJub3r7%2Froz-1.png&hash=1752606d091717c33d99e3dbd2ff28e37f711346)
What her boyfriend wants: (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi923.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fad71%2FJub3r7%2Frozb.png&hash=b95a4d66ee2745be058b12f830a37301e674e4e3)
Compromise: (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi923.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fad71%2FJub3r7%2Fcompromise.png&hash=bd8fc79106f07c13345a486382e8259b3016d803)
Note that's it's not two children but that it's half of each of 4 children.
^ You just made my day Jub. x)
*revives this topic*
Guys, I think I'm in love! <3
Who's the lucky girl? :D
There's a topic for this? :o
Yes now share your personal love life and allow us to share words of wisdom with you! The Love Doctors are in.
Yes, I have multiple doctorates, including:
-Lovology
-Intimate Studies
-Body Linguistics
-Historical Romances, and
-Chemistry
I also have a Masters in Amorous Psychology.
Lol you forgot one I could actually make fun of. :P
Anyway, I'm too picky. And can't really be motivated in this kind of thing.
Quote from: Ruto on August 02, 2012, 04:46:45 PMLol you forgot one I could actually make fun of. :P
Anyway, I'm too picky. And can't really be motivated in this kind of thing.
It's true. Rutato has rejected all of my advances :p
lololololololololol
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 02, 2012, 05:15:16 PMIt's true. Rutato has rejected all of my advances :p
It's okay buddy. The sushi girl wants you. ~le hug
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 02, 2012, 06:03:24 PMIt's okay buddy. The sushi girl wants you. ~le hug
She's so cute <3
Like I told you, man, ask her if they're hiring! :D
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 02, 2012, 06:32:14 PMLike I told you, man, ask her if they're hiring! :D
"hi, are you hiring? Also, can I have yo numbah?"
^works every time :P
As far as relationships go, I had a pretty good relationship that started in January and ended in May, we're still fairly good friends now.
And I'm in a "friends with benefits" sort of relationship with 2 others, but no sex or anything.
Quote from: universe-X on August 02, 2012, 09:44:30 PM^works every time :P
As far as relationships go, I had a pretty good relationship that started in January and ended in May, we're still fairly good friends now.
And I'm in a "friends with benefits" sort of relationship with 2 others, but no sex or anything.
That's no fun :p
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 02, 2012, 09:51:15 PMThat's no fun :p
lol, I'm a "waiting til marriage" type of person :P
Mashi, Marty and I had a very interesting conversation.
Among other things, we discussed the potential for multiple "true loves," whether your true love could be in love with somebody else, and the idea that the opposite of love isn't hate--it's indifference.
I love these types of conversations (no pun intended).
Of course hate isn't the opposite of love, it's apathy.
Because hatred still show that you care about the other person, and have strong feelings for him/her. Indifference/apathy doesn't entail that. The biggest heartbreak isn't "I hate you," it's "I love you, but I'm not in love with you."
Everyone is so philosophical about this.
I guess most of the stuff I know was from listening to a friend talk about marriage for like 8 months. Lol I'm such a noob. And selfish apparently -.-
You're all frivolous.
Quote from: Mashi on August 02, 2012, 11:11:26 PMYou're all frivolous.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.zeldawiki.org%2Fimages%2Fthumb%2Fa%2Fac%2FMakar.png%2F250px-Makar.png&hash=f7d47db5dd48fca84bccabce98c108c9d3e3de35)
...I'm halfway there.
A+++++++++
Quote from: blueflower999 on August 02, 2012, 11:55:29 AMWho's the lucky girl? :D
Her name is Juulia, and she has broken my record in Tetris. :P
I met her by the most romantic way ever. Actually, that story was my first post in NSM. I'm now here in Estonia with her. :D
We have soon been together for 2 months. It's funny, first it was fun but then it got serious. I've never been in a relationship that has lasted over 3 months. :P
She isn't so into music or video games as me, but she's just wonderful. <3 I hope that this relationship works!
PS: I've never got dumped. 8)
I've never been the dumper, even if I can tell a relationship isn't working I wait for them to dump me because I'd rather be the one getting hurt by being dumped than hurting them by dumping them.
...Yeah.
That's a bad mindset. Really, really bad.
:( well god.
^Just saying, if the relationship isn't working out well, you should love yourself enough to not have to deal with pain when you don't have to and to know when to let something like that go ;x
Take everything I say with a grain of salt seeing as I've never actually been in a relationship :P just seems bad to wait for the other person to dump you when you're in a bad relationship :-\
If you are in a bad relationship at no point should you think to yourself "I'll wait until they feel the same."
If that day never comes, you've convinced yourself to stick around against your own happiness. Or that day could come, but you've had a change of heart, making the break-up more harmful. If you ever feel that there's nothing keeping you two together, then there's no reason for you to stick it out, odds are they feel the same way. Otherwise the break-up will be far messier than if you wait, because not only will feelings be hurt, but you both will have lost time to both get over it and move on.
Quote from: Ruto on August 02, 2012, 11:02:30 PMEveryone is so philosophical about this.
I guess most of the stuff I know was from listening to a friend talk about marriage for like 8 months. Lol I'm such a noob. And selfish apparently -.-
What! You're advice works a gem! :D
Quote from: MaestroUGC on August 03, 2012, 07:03:31 PMIf you are in a bad relationship at no point should you think to yourself "I'll wait until they feel the same."
If that day never comes, you've convinced yourself to stick around against your own happiness. Or that day could come, but you've had a change of heart, making the break-up more harmful. If you ever feel that there's nothing keeping you two together, then there's no reason for you to stick it out, odds are they feel the same way. Otherwise the break-up will be far messier than if you wait, because not only will feelings be hurt, but you both will have lost time to both get over it and move on.
I never said how I've done it is a good way.
Quote from: ETFROXX on August 03, 2012, 06:39:19 PMI've never been the dumper, even if I can tell a relationship isn't working I wait for them to dump me because I'd rather be the one getting hurt by being dumped than hurting them by dumping them.
...Yeah.
I dump people if I see that this relationship won't work. I don't want to be in a relationship if I don't want to.
Quote from: fingerz on August 03, 2012, 07:10:23 PMWhat! Your advice works a gem! :D
Ohh thanks :D I try to learn as much as I can before I do stuff. It's like lab, can't do the experiment without reading the procedure first because you'd just end up with broken glass, toxic fumes and ten people running and screaming for their lives.
Or as Akira put it, "First you must fill your head with wisdom, then you can hit ice with it."
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 03, 2012, 11:18:16 PMI dump people if I see that this relationship won't work. I don't want to be in a relationship if I don't want to.
"I"?
I'm too boss to get dumped. 8)
Somebody has to tell that this relationship is over. That's usually me.
You're missing the point entirely -.-
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 04, 2012, 06:38:17 AMI'm too boss to get dumped. 8)
Somebody has to tell that this relationship is over. That's usually me.
lol, I'm sorry, but I don't think that streak's gonna last very long with an ego like that. just saying.
I've had only one legitimate relationship and I wasn't the dumper nor the dumped. We kinda just drifted away from being a couple and back to being good friends.
Yeah, relationships are silly. Frivolous, you might even say.
Quote from: universe-X on August 04, 2012, 12:16:38 PMlol, I'm sorry, but I don't think that streak's gonna last very long with an ego like that. just saying.
I'm FSM-Reapr and this
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.personalblimp.com%2Fimages%2Ffront_page.jpg&hash=3d779b9a70e7eff9a8344598ae4924abe5d30980)
is roughly a third of the size of my ego.
Just remember that being a dickwad is a bannable offense.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 05, 2012, 11:42:37 AMGee, why are everybody so serious around here?! IT WAS A JOKE!!!
And no Slow, you don't have to post that picture again.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi3.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F003%2F189%2Fheath_ledger_joker.jpeg&hash=d79548f813df64bb4e4661ede3b39d540765bae8)
okay i will
Back on topic: What are y'all's opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend?
I did that once and because of that I hardly talk to her now.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on August 05, 2012, 06:22:33 PMI did that once and because of that I hardly talk to her now.
:( I'm sorry.
I agree with Jub...
In addition, I'm also going to rant that relationships ruin everything -.-
Quote from: Ruto on August 05, 2012, 06:47:58 PMI agree with Jub...
In addition, I'm also going to rant that relationships ruin everything -.-
Idk, I sorta pursued something like that. Once we broke up, we didn't talk for 2 months before continuing as normal.
And why do relationships ruin everything? o.o
From what I'm observing, you need to do everything with the other person. Apparently any other person becomes trash you can just throw money/ridicule at and have them go away.
I think there's a possibility I'm being spied on again so I don't really want to say more than that.
Quote from: Ruto on August 05, 2012, 07:19:40 PMFrom what I'm observing, you need to do everything with the other person. Apparently any other person becomes trash you can just throw money/ridicule at and have them go away.
I think there's a possibility I'm being spied on again so I don't really want to say more than that.
...well shit.
Quote from: Ruto on August 05, 2012, 07:19:40 PMFrom what I'm observing, you need to do everything with the other person. Apparently any other person becomes trash you can just throw money/ridicule at and have them go away.
I think there's a possibility I'm being spied on again so I don't really want to say more than that.
That all depends on the person. What exactly are you observing?
Yah Ruto you're unfairly judging relationships based only on your observations of others :P
Well I'm observing the people that live with me (unfair, I guess) -.- Honestly their behavior on the phone and in public is extremely annoying and I don't want to be like that.
In addition to that, it seems that no one here is going to let me do the same anyway. Jealousy problems, time constraints, and other stuff I'm supposed to do at home. I don't have a chance.
You know, there's no obligation for you to behave like that, right?
Chances are if you're going to end up in a relationship they're going to understand the kind of person you are. If they don't then you've rushed into something neither of you were ready for.
Quote from: universe-X on August 05, 2012, 06:15:34 PMBack on topic: What are y'all's opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend?
Being in a relationship with someone who's already your best friend shouldn't really change the relationship you already have with them. More one-on-one outings and a more open possibility of sexual activity(from holding hands to kissing to sexy time), but that's about it. People put labels on everything: THIS IS BEST FRIEND WHO IS GIRL, THIS IS GIRLFRIEND WHO IS BEST. It's the same damn thing, it's just the relationship gets viewed differently by others.
Those are my thoughts.
Quote from: universe-X on August 05, 2012, 06:15:34 PMBack on topic: What are y'all's opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend?
My best friend in the entire world is a girl - a pretty beautiful one. I know she views me as her best friend in the entire world too. I've known her for 4 years (I knew she existed for 7 years). I Met her 'cause we both play sax in our school band. We're pretty close, tho I dunno why she's hanging with me so much, 'cause I'm probably not that interesting. Anyways, we're that kinda friends that always hugs when we meet each other and say goodbye, no prob holding hands with each other, some friendly kissing...
There was a period where we thought "hell, lets just make it official!" - Nothing changed between us! We were as good as the same friends we were before - tho I know lots of people who consider what we were WAY more than friends, which we kinda were - We were kissing as friends. Seeing how pointless it was to make it official, 'cause we both enjoyed "friendship" instead of "dating", we broke up, and we're still as close as ever. We still hug, we still hold hands, we still kiss each other - I think I prefer it this way, but I might get a problem if I met someone else - 'cause then I'd
at least have to stop kissing this girl.
You asked about opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend. I'd say it would depend on how close you are to your best friend.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 06, 2012, 08:53:59 AMBeing in a relationship with someone who's already your best friend shouldn't really change the relationship you already have with them.
This was my case. In my pack of friends it's me and her who are closest. We might've been extra close compared to other best-friend-couples, but making my best friend my girlfriend didn't change, and shouldn't have changed, our relationship.
Quote from: universe-X on August 05, 2012, 06:15:34 PMBack on topic: What are y'all's opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend?
I would be devastated if a relationship between me and my best friend wouldn't work. That's why I keep relationships and friends separated. I'm too afraid that we wouldn't talk to each other anymore.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 06, 2012, 12:07:31 PMI would be devastated if a relationship between me and my best friend wouldn't work. That's why I keep relationships and friends separated. I'm too afraid that we wouldn't talk to each other anymore.
I'm sooo(o) glad that didn't happen to me - My best friend is irreplaceable. What's weird to think about is; Chances were, that could've happened :o
I'm sure everyone here will find love, exept those:
(https://i.chzbgr.com/completestore/12/8/6/QVX8ZjLLS0mxkGDF1_z8uQ2.jpg)
It happens.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 08, 2012, 09:06:57 AMI'm sure everyone here will find love, exept those:
im sorry mashi, i'll try harder
try harder for what
mashi wants me to explicate in the skype chat room but ive been banned from the computer so whoops
Sushi girl gave me her name. Annie <3
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 14, 2012, 02:16:10 PMSushi girl gave me her name. Annie <3
lol. What I imagined:
"Hello, I'm Annie. How may I help you?"
Not saying that's what happened, just something that popped up.
Quote from: Zunawe on August 14, 2012, 02:48:45 PMlol. What I imagined:
"Hello, I'm Annie. How may I help you?"
Not saying that's what happened, just something that popped up.
She asked for my name since I gave it in an earlier visitation and I guess she wanted to verify or something. I introduced myself first then asked for her name since that's the proper way I do things.
She's so cute <3
Maybe I should eat more sushi. :)
Damn. My ex-girlfriend is so freaking hot, but definitely NOT worth getting back together for...f-ing puberty.
Ohh that struggle of looks vs. personality.
Thankfully the girls I'm interested in for now have both.
Quote from: Kman96 on August 14, 2012, 04:08:02 PMDamn. My ex-girlfriend is so freaking hot, but definitely NOT worth getting back together for...f-ing puberty.
mmd
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 14, 2012, 03:43:15 PMShe asked for my name since I gave it in an earlier visitation and I guess she wanted to verify or something. I introduced myself first then asked for her name since that's the proper way I do things.
She's so cute <3
Yes! Next time try to ask her out!
Quote from: Roz~ on August 14, 2012, 05:03:39 PMYes! Next time try to ask her out!
Quantum Field Theory!
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 14, 2012, 03:43:15 PMShe asked for my name since I gave it in an earlier visitation and I guess she wanted to verify or something. I introduced myself first then asked for her name since that's the proper way I do things.
She's so cute <3
AWWWW YEAH, TAKING IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL.
Shado where are the stalker pics
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 14, 2012, 03:43:15 PMShe asked for my name since I gave it in an earlier visitation and I guess she wanted to verify or something. I introduced myself first then asked for her name since that's the proper way I do things.
She's so cute <3
8)
looolll this topic is nice :)
but for me...kinda awkward to say it lol....
\(•A•\)===33
Shado, congratulations! :)
I'm so happy for everybody today! idk why...
Relationship status change!
From: Eternally Single
To: Officially giving up.
Yay.
Nice
Quote from: Cobraroll on August 15, 2012, 02:20:09 PMRelationship status change!
From: Eternally Single
To: Officially giving up.
Yay.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi0.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F003%2F619%2FUntitled-1.jpg&hash=dd23920ae7f0b5df7ab6c9e17a0dccbac6e50501)
Quote from: Kman96 on August 14, 2012, 04:08:02 PMDamn. My ex-girlfriend is so freaking hot, but definitely NOT worth getting back together for...f-ing puberty.
friends with benefits ;)
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 15, 2012, 03:47:14 PMfriends with benefits ;)
...I didn't wanna say it.
...Already tried that. Still didn't work.
Quote from: Cobraroll on August 15, 2012, 02:20:09 PMRelationship status change!
From: Eternally Single
To: Officially giving up.
Yay.
:( I guess that means more science fairs for you to go to. But hey, won't you have more time for yourself?
Quote from: Ruto on August 15, 2012, 06:44:43 PM:( I guess that means more science fairs for you to go to. But hey, won't you have more time for yourself?
Science fair? Not really sure if I've ever been to one, or if the campus can be called a continous one.
And if I get more time for myself now, well, the day only has so many hours.
This is a big day for me. I know I love my girlfriend, and I think she loves me too. It's only been 2 months, but love is blind.
I'm asking her to marry me tonight. Wish me luck!
;D Ohhoo GOOD LUCK!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 16, 2012, 06:02:59 AMThis is a big day for me. I know I love my girlfriend, and I think she loves me too. It's only been 2 months, but love is blind.
I'm asking her to marry me tonight. Wish me luck!
WHHHOOOOAAA!! GO FSM!!! Pray for ya!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 16, 2012, 06:02:59 AMThis is a big day for me. I know I love my girlfriend, and I think she loves me too. It's only been 2 months, but love is blind.
I'm asking her to marry me tonight. Wish me luck!
O_O
Good luck!
I would recommend dating for more than two months before you propose, though...
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 16, 2012, 06:02:59 AMThis is a big day for me. I know I love my girlfriend, and I think she loves me too. It's only been 2 months, but love is blind.
I'm asking her to marry me tonight. Wish me luck!
We'll keep your seat in the "My life sucks Thread" warm for ya.
I'm kidding, gl bud.
Quote from: Dude on August 16, 2012, 08:53:50 AMWe'll keep your seat in the "My life sucks Thread" warm for ya.
I'm kidding, gl bud.
That's terrible. XD
Good luck FSM! Now that you've shared that I expect to hear results as well! :D
I will tell tomorrow. 2 hours and it's go-time.
*hands are very sweaty*
Good luck, but I wouldn't rush into such a huge commitment. If it's what you want, go for it, don't let me or anybody else stand in the way of your future.
Don't worry, the actual wedding won't be for a long time(I hope). :3
Quote from: Cobraroll on August 16, 2012, 12:37:23 AMScience fair? Not really sure if I've ever been to one, or if the campus can be called a continous one.
And if I get more time for myself now, well, the day only has so many hours.
A campus doesn't count. I mean, a real science fair XD Where people have posters and talk about their work.
I don't have enough time for everything I want to do as it is -.- even without someone to constantly badger...
Quote from: MaestroUGC on August 16, 2012, 10:56:07 AMGood luck, but I wouldn't rush into such a huge commitment. If it's what you want, go for it, don't let me or anybody else stand in the way of your future.
Yahhhh. I've heard this kind of thing from some married and unmarried friends...Those are a bit personal so I don't think I'll give more details here. Generally when I hear engagement, a wedding is no more than a year off though.
Good luck bud
Yeah, good luck FSM! Hope it all goes well! At least you're not me, nothing EVER goes to plan when I try and do something... XD
Actually, not true! Scored a slighty-more-intimate conversation with a special someone yesterday and now I'm going to perform for her next week on the piano. :D
She said:
YES!!! XD
I'm so happy! Let me tell you how I purposed: We went to eat in an expensive restaurant, then after we had talked for while, I proposed which was hard because:
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 14, 2012, 06:14:58 AMI tripped today and broke my knee.
So you can imagine that it was hard. But extremely romantic. I gave her a golden ring that has few little diamonds in the
inner side of the ring, which is supposed to let her know that she's beautiful inside also! Guys, she actually said: "Yes!!! Yes yes yes!!! *screams a little bit* I will marry you!!!"
That was
the happiest moment in my life! Do not
ever and I mean
ever doubt the power of love!
<3
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on August 17, 2012, 05:29:41 AMShe said:
YES!!! XD
I'm so happy! Let me tell you how I purposed: We went to eat in an expensive restaurant, then after we had talked for while, I purposed which was hard because:So you can imagine that it was hard. But extremely romantic. I gave her a golden ring that has few little diamonds in the inner side of the ring, which is supposed to let her know that she's beautiful inside also! Guys, she actually said: "Yes!!! Yes yes yes!!! *screams a little bit* I will marry you!!!"
That was the happiest moment in my life! Do not ever and I mean ever doubt the power of love!
<3
:D :D :D
Happy for you!!! Hope you guys have a great and happy life together!
Congrats, Reapr!
Thanks guys! :)
Nice man! Congrats. I was worried that 2 months wasn't very long, but evidently she had the same feelings. Did you decide on a wedding date? Did you get any applause? :D
(Oh btw, it's "proposed")
We promised that we won't get married until we finish our studies. And yes, we got a huge rain of applause! :D
Congratulations! ;D
Yay! Congrats, FSM! :D
Congrats FSM! ;D
Whoa ho ho, congratulations FSM! :)
Thanks guys!(once more) :D
Actually, the story how I met her, was my first post in NSM.
Eeee!! Congrats FSM! :D I'm so happy for you guys! <3
Thanks Nebu! :D Ilu2!
I changed my avatar for a day. :P
nawwwwww! congrats FSM!!!
Wow you're asking her to marry you? Good luck bro!
Quote from: Roz~ on August 18, 2012, 07:59:44 PMWow you've asked her to marry you? Good job bro!
fixed i guess.
Edited because mashi told me to.
Congrats FSM! ;)
What questions would one ask someone to get to know them better?
What color panties are you wearing now?
In all honestly, I have no clue.
Awesome job FSM :)
Dodongo dislikes
Dodongo likes
Soooo people are basically pressuring me to pursue a relationship. What pisses me off is that they don't think I'll do it on my own?
At the end of the day, the decision is up to you. No amount of peer pressuring matters when you make your final choice to get into a relationship, you make the choice, not them. So you need to make sure you are in the mind-set to pursue a relationship.
Being pressured into a relationship is pretty much friends asking for you to entertain them with all the drama. Rarely, I've found, is it actually because they're interested in you being happy in that relationship.
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 19, 2012, 12:26:46 PMWhat questions would one ask someone to get to know them better?
Hmm I guess questions about her interests, what does she like, etc.
Mention music :D
Quote from: Ruto on August 19, 2012, 06:39:02 PMMention Pokemon :D
Fixed for great justice! :P
But yeah you can ask her if she likes music, what's her favorite group/artist; you can also ask her if she likes video games, tv shows, etc.
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 19, 2012, 12:26:46 PMWhat questions would one ask someone to get to know them better?
How long you been working here?
Do you go to school? Where?
Video games. You liek?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely will reproductive activities occur between us in the near future?
You seen any good movies lately?
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 19, 2012, 09:52:01 PMHow long you been working here?
Do you go to school? Where?
Video games. You liek?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely will reproductive activities occur between us in the near future?
You seen any good movies lately?
*takes notes*
Today I started to search for a home for us. :)
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 19, 2012, 09:52:01 PMHow long you been working here?
Do you go to school? Where?
Video games. You liek?
On a scale of 1 to 10, how likely will reproductive activities occur between us in the near future?
You seen any good movies lately?
You're not serious about #4, right?
Aaugh you are such a bitch aren't you....I can understand if you don't want to be friends with me anymore but I don't think ignoring me completely is called for, especially when you still have my flash drive from last year and I need it back.
Although, let's be honest...I'd be fine without the flash drive if you would just talk to me.
I found this kind-of funny. Not to be mean, it was just very apropos.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 20, 2012, 05:16:15 PMAaugh you are such a bitch aren't you....I can understand if you don't want to be friends with me anymore but I don't think ignoring me completely is called for, especially when you still have my flash drive from last year and I need it back.
Although, let's be honest...I'd be fine without the flash drive if you would just talk to me.
That flash driving-hoarding bitch!
Slow you are the King of spontaneity.
This isn't M******t is it? :O
Quote from: Ruto on August 20, 2012, 05:06:34 PMYou're not serious about #4, right?
Not serious? It's the important question of all!
Quote from: spitllama on August 20, 2012, 06:37:39 PMSlow you are the King of spontaneity.
This isn't M******t is it? :O
nope don't worry
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 20, 2012, 06:42:41 PMNot serious? It's the important question of all!
You like ice cream cone hats? -.-
It's Teragram.
omg margarets name backwards is best
shes 1/12th as massive as the earth but omg
XDDDDDD
Quote from: Ruto on August 20, 2012, 06:54:15 PMYou like ice cream cone hats? -.-
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcn1.kaboodle.com%2Fhi%2Fimg%2F2%2F0%2F0%2F165%2Fc%2FAAAAAnlVVwMAAAAAAWXHyw.jpg%3Fv%3D1224625033000&hash=a463227771aa9c844a68c23076b7f45adf981b34)
Yes
Quote from: Ruto on August 20, 2012, 06:54:15 PMYou like ice cream cone hats? -.-
Of course! It's the most DELICIOUS hat there is!
Cheeseburger hat. . .
Ice cream hat >>>>>>>>>>> Cheeseburger hat
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi662.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu347%2Fdeku_nut%2F558668_10151052124513791_1531172579_n.jpg&hash=7506e2103caaf9bdf0df0b8800299a16bd96f48d)
It's not as fun as it looks...
Why am I so awkward?
She probably doesn't want to go out with some jobless loser like me.
Well then get a job and start being a winner.
There, that seemed simple enough.
Shadoninja, a winner is you and if she can't see that, MAKE her see it.
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 21, 2012, 12:41:47 PMWhy am I so awkward?
She probably doesn't want to go out with some jobless loser like me.
That is so not a factor
Get a job if you want one, don't get a job to impress some girl.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 21, 2012, 01:19:30 PMShadoninja, a winner is you and if she can't see that, MAKE her see it.
Also ^this
Im not gonna get a job to impress a girl, but I do need one.
^Hat tester.
She wasn't ignoring me!!!
On another note, there are opportunities for relationships EVERYWHERE all of a sudden. I say all of a sudden, but is it just that I haven't seen them before? Either way, nobody I'd really consider a relationship with so I'll keep holding off.
UGH!! Why are females so vexing?
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on August 21, 2012, 07:14:56 PMUGH!! Why are females so vexing?
If things were easy, it probably wouldn't be worth it.
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on August 21, 2012, 07:14:56 PMUGH!! Why are females so vexing?
1) Don't call girls/women "females" 2) I think the same way about guys XD
Quote from: Ruto on August 21, 2012, 09:07:59 PM1) Don't call girls/women "females"
My apologies.
But I want to know, is it a normal girl thing to say "I love you" to guys and not mean it, and not say it to who you might mean it?
It's a normal thing for anyone to say "I love you"to anyone else and not mean anything. Love has become a fairly dead word.
Interesting.
Lolololol "I love you" doesn't mean anything if you're not actually in a relationship
SlowPokemon, I love you.
Well it's comforting to know that this means I'm not going crazy and I still have a shot.
I remember my old roommate who used to talk to her boyfriend on the phone all the time in college saying that before she went to bed. That was before she dumped him and then started dating someone else a few weeks after. So what you said probably has some truth to it.
That being said, I don't say it if I don't mean it XD I usually just say 'good night'.
Quote from: Mashi on August 22, 2012, 07:22:34 AMSlowPokemon, I love you.
I love you as well, you lascivious beast
;)
Also, good night, Ruto.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 22, 2012, 08:08:49 AMI love you as well, you lascivious beast
A+++++++++ :D
Quote from: Mashi on August 22, 2012, 08:11:29 AM;)
Also, good night, Ruto.
Hahaha I meant I'd use that to say good bye to someone xD I just think it's meaningless to use that to end a conversation all the time...
lol you're one to talk
what.
::)
So I think I have a "Sushi bar girl" crush on the girl that sits behind me in Public Speaking. THANK GOD it's a class where I'm forced to speak to her for a grade!
Are "sushi bar girl" crushes a thing now
Yes
if you have a crush you have to refer to it as a sushi girl crush
Blame Shado :3
Quote from: Roz~ on August 28, 2012, 07:16:50 PMYes
if you have a crush you have to refer to it as a sushi girl crush
Blame Shado :3
*changes identity and moves to antarctica*
So, some BITCH decided to take my seat next to cute girl today. And then we were assigned a project in which we were to work with a partner over the next two weeks and the same BITCH asked cute girl to be her partner before I had the chance. WHAT A BITCH, STEALIN' MAH WIMMINS!
This may surprise you but girls actually aren't flattered when you refer to them or their friends as bitches
.....watt.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on August 30, 2012, 11:30:07 PMThis may surprise you but girls actually aren't flattered when you refer to them or their friends as bitches
Yeah, I found it pretty insulting -.-
In other news, this weird guy that keeps complimenting my hair passed by me in the street. This is the third time I've seen him and I don't even know his name or why he's even around. The other times it was in the train station, but it's weirder on the street since I'm not exactly standing around waiting for the train. He should really stop, it's creepy.
This old man did that to me at church. He leaned over and whispered "I love your hair". Apparently he does that to every little girl with red hair, but its a little weirder when I'm not a little girl
There's at least a million people in Manhattan and I dunno how this same guy's found me several times. The first two times he asked me if I had a boyfriend and this time I just quickly said "thanks" and walked away -.- It creeps me out -.-
^Stalker D:
That's what I thought when I saw him the second time. The third time, I was walking down the street where I lived -.- There's a possibility of stalking, I guess.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FWENVx.gif&hash=5fece386947a39e070ed4253b0bafca61e2347d7)
Srsly guys -.- I said "no" the first time, what makes him think I'll change my mind?
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on August 30, 2012, 11:30:07 PMThis may surprise you but girls actually aren't flattered when you refer to them or their friends as bitches
Quote from: Ruto on August 31, 2012, 06:39:59 PMYeah, I found it pretty insulting -.-
So apparently it's only okay when LITERALLY EVERYONE ELSE ON THE FORUM uses the word to describe a woman they disapprove of?
(Do I even need fucking examples?)Because that makes sense.
I've never done it, and I don't think I've seen anyone else so so either. Also, she doesn't belong to you, so why are you getting all possessive?
GOD DAMN, I WAS JOKING. You guys are making want to smash my face through a table right now. Seriously.
Just ignore it, Kefka's a prick and it's not worth arguing with him
We now interrupt this thread for KITTENS:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F4.bp.blogspot.com%2F-2FWqYMQ1AtI%2FT_EYI96U2kI%2FAAAAAAAABzk%2F7wpJD8xEaH0%2Fs1600%2Fsleepy-ginger-kittens.jpg&hash=1af2e19f31c6570f5c040d16375084d58e08d836)
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ft0.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AANd9GcR2BdPtMQclwfOPUoiCPmTHz8ePVJv6hvyNA3oFG15NQYt4hiMNJQ%26amp%3Bt%3D1&hash=a39d7ecb8faba865659960490cfffc700a8cffaa)
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F3.bp.blogspot.com%2F_MQlLQc8r_NE%2FTDUYnqMhX3I%2FAAAAAAAAGhE%2FKHRLjBa9SHc%2Fs1600%2FJubilee_KittensA.jpg&hash=c9e871c8bf601f371ee0e4a5984814bdf157511a)
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpetcaregt.com%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2008%2F11%2Fkitten-sleeping1.jpg&hash=ecc6d6457a95099c5ac03cfb6394a666ddade69f)
D'AWWWWWW
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 30, 2012, 11:24:29 PMSo, some BITCH decided to take my seat next to cute girl today. And then we were assigned a project in which we were to work with a partner over the next two weeks and the same BITCH asked cute girl to be her partner before I had the chance. WHAT A BITCH, STEALIN' MAH WIMMINS!
*cough* happens to me all the time *cough*
Quote from: Shadoninja on August 31, 2012, 09:40:13 PMWe now interupt this thread for KITTENS:
That, sir is going on my sig.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 31, 2012, 09:32:04 PMGOD DAMN, I WAS JOKING. You guys are making want to smash my face through a table right now. Seriously.
it's just one of those things that are more offensive when it's said by someone who aren't expected to have that kind of opinion. Like how pretty much all women would get mad if you call them sluts or whores (whether they are feminists or not). You really didn't need to call her a bitch, maybe just "some girl." -.-
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 31, 2012, 09:33:18 PMJust ignore it, Kefka's a prick and it's not worth arguing with him
Gahhh, don't make Kefka seem like the angry feminist here -.- It's me, I swear.
Here, have a hammy.
^I was trying to convey a ridiculous amount of outrage towards the harmless action of taking a seat. And "some girl" just seemed too logical and reasonable of a term to use.
But sorry for being offensive, Ruto.
She has a boyfriend >.>
NOOOOOOOO Shado I'm sorry. You guys can still get to know each other though.
Mmmmm that seems hella awk though considering everything up to this point was in a romantic interest.
Just bail, eat a tub of ice cream to get the moping out of your system, and move on. You'll find another.
I figured Shado was keeping everything subtle actually.... :-\
Quote from: Shadoninja on September 04, 2012, 03:15:40 PMShe has a boyfriend >.>
awww...sorry Shado :(
on a lighter note:
The friend zone. I have escaped it.
1) Sorry shadow
2)Escaped the friend zone? is that even possible?
3) I've been placed in the limbo between the friend zone and dating, it doesn't really make sense.
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on September 05, 2012, 08:35:18 PM2)Escaped the friend zone? is that even possible?
Its possible! I did it literally 45 minutes ago.
details my friend, details please
Well, I started going out with this girl on the last day of 8th grade. We were together until February of the next year when she broke up with me because we never did anything (as we weren't able to drive) Well, I promised myself this year that I would ask her out on the first day of school. Well that didn't happen. so I waited an extra two weeks :P
quick fact: she's also in the story and has an account on the site.
what?? o:
Well, well, well. It seems the winds, they are a-changing. Good on ya' mate.
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 05, 2012, 08:25:15 PMawww...sorry Shado :(
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on September 05, 2012, 08:35:18 PM2)Escaped the friend zone? is that even possible?
As long as it's not a horse pen, which is where I'm pretty much dumping all the creeps into.
@other replies
...Anyway, it just seems to be a matter of effort -.- But not too much or it's the horse pen :/
Who's the only person in the story that you don't know right away who they are? [/hint]
Taylor
Damn NINJA!
But yeah, things are lookin up :) just thought I'd give y'all hope. IT'S TOTES POSSIBLE!
le bump
Is anyone(else) here engaged/married?
As I'm gay, I'm not engaged nor married.
'Cause the damn gov'ment be hatin on me... That and I'm super shy. ::)
Well me, Roz, and Hugo are married to ETF.
Okay, decided to ask a question, because I honestly have no idea what to do.
What would be an extremely romantic surprise for the girlfriend, when you want to tell that you're sorry for being busy and not spending as much time with her than you're supposed to?
totes longest question ever
Quote from: Dude on September 30, 2012, 11:23:54 AMAs I'm gay, I'm not engaged nor married.
'Cause the damn gov'ment be hatin on me... That and I'm super shy. ::)
Get married in Canada. Problem solved!
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on September 30, 2012, 12:15:07 PMWell me, Roz, and Hugo are married to ETF.
Yes and she's the best wifey ever <3
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on September 30, 2012, 12:32:09 PMOkay, decided to ask a question, because I honestly have no idea what to do.
What would be an extremely romantic surprise for the girlfriend, when you want to tell that you're sorry for being busy and not spending as much time with her than you're supposed to?
totes longest question ever
Just take a day off and spend it with her. I guess you could do something she really likes, but I suck at romantic stuff so I can't help you much.
Then it wouldn't be a surprise... :(
Roz, what's the most romantic thing a guy could do for you?
Just answer that.
My most romantic thing what I've ever done was that I took her on a picnic on a rowing boat at night while the moon was shining.
Gosh, that must be like the only romantic thing I've done! D:
So I've begun liking another girl, one who I think will be much better for me (and vice versa) than my ex.I don't wanna ask her out yet (I might ask her to Prom when the time comes), but I think in a few weeks I might tell her how I feel.
Any ideas how I could do it?
Ninja'd: aw, FSM, you studmuffin ;)
;) I highly recommend a boat ride. ;) If you can't find a boat then ask her out for a cup in Starbucks and tell her how you feel!
FSM YOU NEED ROMANCE?
Be all like "WANNA COME RIDE WITH ME TO A BORING PLACE?" It might take a bit of convincing but I'm sure she'll eventually agree to come with ya. NEXT, drive to some mountains and go to a cliff overlooking a bunch of stuff all DRAMATICALLY. Then, get out and have a delicious dinner next to the cliff, prepared by a chef(preferably French) who you hired to serve you dinner on the DRAMATIC cliff. Then be all like, "GIRL, I KNOW THINGS HAVE BEEN TOUGH BUT I LOVE YA WITH ALL MY HEART. BABY, YOU'RE MY FOREVER GIRL." And then ummmmm some other stuff might happen next, if you catch my drift.
That's what I'd do if I lived near mountains. Or could hire a chef. Or had a girlfriend. yeah.
hey sfk wanna come ride with me to a boring place
No girlfriend?! WHAT IS THIS MADNESS!!! With those tips you should be like the Casanova of NSM!
Too bad there's no mountains near where I live. :( But there are lots of VERY dramatic cliffs here! Too bad there are always motorways/highways(what's the word?) under those cliffs...
I wonder how can people make a cliff dramatic...
*starts playing Van Halen*
ninja'd
I fail at romantic advice so I can't help you at all sorry :C
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on September 30, 2012, 12:32:09 PMWhat would be an extremely romantic surprise for the girlfriend, when you want to tell that you're sorry for being busy and not spending as much time with her than you're supposed to?
Act out this scene:
Lol jk. If it wasn't freezing where you are, what about some kind of botanical garden? Mashi can say that the New York one with that Monet exhibit was totally awesome and it had a ton of indoor and greenhouse stuff. --> http://www.nybg.org/ There could be something that's closer to where you live lol. Though I wouldn't say no to something awsm like...what do girls like again? xD
Quote from: Dude on September 30, 2012, 11:23:54 AMAs I'm gay, I'm not engaged nor married.
Come to NY lol. Not upstate though.
There's a girl in my class, who's trying to make life suck for me (when we're together with other people, that is), like bullying me, but when we're alone, she can't let my hands go.
What's the diagnosis (as Slow would put it)?
I really really dislike this girl...
The classic "Girl makes you miserable because she actually likes you" situation.
Quote from: Jompa on October 01, 2012, 01:02:25 AMThere's a girl in my class, who's trying to make life suck for me (when we're together with other people, that is), like bullying me, but when we're alone, she can't let my hands go.
What's the diagnosis (as Slow would put it)?
I really really dislike this girl...
Why do you dislike her?
Quote from: Jompa on October 01, 2012, 01:02:25 AMThere's a girl in my class, who's trying to make life suck for me (when we're together with other people, that is), like bullying me,
And yet
Quote from: Jompa on October 01, 2012, 01:02:25 AMbut when we're alone, she can't let my hands go.
She may in fact like you a lot. I think you should ask her out to catch her off guard.
I thought he already had a girlfriend?! :o
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 01, 2012, 11:00:17 AMI thought he already had a girlfriend?! :o
If that's true, than why is he holding hands with another woman HMMMMMM?
Quote from: Shadoninja on October 01, 2012, 10:45:50 AMShe may in fact like you a lot. I think you should ask her out to catch her off guard.
That doesn't change the fact the I dislike her.. She's not really a 'good person' when we're alone either,
And no; i don't have a girlfriend - Fsm is probably refering to my bestfriend tht i posted about awhile ago..
Quote from: Jompa on August 06, 2012, 11:51:44 AMMy best friend in the entire world is a girl - a pretty beautiful one. I know she views me as her best friend in the entire world too. I've known her for 4 years (I knew she existed for 7 years). I Met her 'cause we both play sax in our school band. We're pretty close, tho I dunno why she's hanging with me so much, 'cause I'm probably not that interesting. Anyways, we're that kinda friends that always hugs when we meet each other and say goodbye, no prob holding hands with each other, some friendly kissing...
There was a period where we thought "hell, lets just make it official!" - Nothing changed between us! We were as good as the same friends we were before - tho I know lots of people who consider what we were WAY more than friends, which we kinda were - We were kissing as friends. Seeing how pointless it was to make it official, 'cause we both enjoyed "friendship" instead of "dating", we broke up, and we're still as close as ever. We still hug, we still hold hands, we still kiss each other - I think I prefer it this way, but I might get a problem if I met someone else - 'cause then I'd at least have to stop kissing this girl.
You asked about opinions on pursuing a relationship with your best friend. I'd say it would depend on how close you are to your best friend. This was my case. In my pack of friends it's me and her who are closest. We might've been extra close compared to other best-friend-couples, but making my best friend my girlfriend didn't change, and shouldn't have changed, our relationship.
This made me think that Jompa has a girlfriend.
ninja'd: okay
Goddamn double post :(
I decided to take her to a spa. I already bought her a massage. And before that we go soak in hot tubs.
Also, I'm planning to go US studying for 2 years. She will graduate this year, but I don't know if she would come with me... Goddamn, this is hard. :(
If you are going to be marrying this girl, one would assume she'd be living with you. Have you talked to her about it, and if so, what did she say?
Yeah, probably not a discussion that shouldpop up the day before the wedding. "I love you so much. I'm so glad we're getting Oh btw... WE'RE MOVE 3000 MILES AWAY FROM EVERYTHING YOU KNOW AND LOVE NEXT WEEK. KAY, LOVE YA, BAI!
@Maestro No, I haven't even told her yet about my plans. She'll finish her studies this year, so I'm sure it would work. I hope.
Don't wait, this is a big change and a big move; by telling her now you give time to at least plan and prepare for it.
To be really honest I don't think she's likely to come with you if you do. Unless she's studying too, foreigners are only allowed to stay for about 6 months in the States (unless you do other paperwork). Even if she's here, she can't legally work. It seems pretty shallow to bring her here just to keep you company for 2 years.
^I know. :(
That's why this is hard. But I couldn't live without her. :(
You should talk to her about it. What if she doesn't want to live in the US for 2 years? You shouldn't just "hope everthing works" because it might not. Talk to her about it and if she wants to follow you, then she can start making all the paperwork she needs to stay in the US for more than just 6 months.
I'm waiting for the right moment to tell.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 03, 2012, 08:24:24 AMI'm waiting for the right moment to tell.
The best moment is now. Just call her and be like, "I want to talk." Then take her out to a nice dinner and over the course of dinner (Maybe after after a few alchoholic drinks) say,"Right, now I invited you here because I'm going to the USA for 2 years. You wanna come?" And viola! Subject is notioned and what ever comes after that would be the best outcome of all.
^ -.-'
She has exams this week, and on Saturday I'll take her to the spa. So I'm waiting for the right moment.
How sure are you about coming to the States?
I hate to brag, but I'm pretty much the best pianist and jazz-guitarist from the people in my age of my school.
I've been in touch with the school now for a while, investigating the opportunities I could have by going there.
I'm already planning my audio tape I'll send there. If they like my tape, they'll invite me to live auditions in there in March. If I get there, I'll start in August(if I recall).
I'm sure I'll get there, if I decide to.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 03, 2012, 05:40:34 PMNot sure if intentional or not
Not intentional. I just suck at spelling :P
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 03, 2012, 10:04:21 AMI hate to brag, but I'm pretty much the best pianist and jazz-guitarist from the people in my age of my school.
I've been in touch with the school now for a while, investigating the opportunities I could have by going there.
I'm already planning my audio tape I'll send there. If they like my tape, they'll invite me to live auditions in there in March. If I get there, I'll start in August(if I recall).
I'm sure I'll get there, if I decide to.
Where in the US? Sorry if Im interrupting something, but I keep waiting to walk into someone somewhere and freak out because I know them
I told her.
I'm not leaving alone. :D
We have spent the entire evening to see possible choices for her.
She'll try to get in the NYIT.
Yaaay *no smiley face can express a big smile like this*
yay FSM! :D
That's great! Very glad to see it worked out.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 04, 2012, 02:46:06 PMI told her.
I'm not leaving alone. :D
We have spent the entire evening to see possible choices for her.
She'll try to get in the NYIT.
Yaaay *no smiley face can express a big smile like this*
LIKE A BAWSSProps, man.
Also this:
Quote from: TheZeldaPianist275 on October 04, 2012, 08:04:00 PMShe really must love you!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 04, 2012, 02:46:06 PMI told her.
I'm not leaving alone. :D
We have spent the entire evening to see possible choices for her.
She'll try to get in the NYIT.
Yaaay *no smiley face can express a big smile like this*
:DDDDD So happy for you, Reapr! She really must love you! Congrats!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 04, 2012, 02:46:06 PMI told her.
I'm not leaving alone. :D
We have spent the entire evening to see possible choices for her.
She'll try to get in the NYIT.
Yaaay *no smiley face can express a big smile like this*
Congrats FSM! :D
Wow, that's great, FSM! :D
Ohh that's great. Easier said than done sometimes though :/
So this guy that my friend says is flirting with me invited me to go to the meetings at this school club. I don't really know what to say...he's nice but I'm not really into interested in anything, really. Also I don't like being flirted with -.-
Quote from: Ruto on October 13, 2012, 07:46:35 PMOhh that's great. Easier said than done sometimes though :/
So this guy that my friend says is flirting with me invited me to go to the meetings at this school club. I don't really know what to say...he's nice but I'm not really into interested in anything, really. Also I don't like being flirted with -.-
What's the club? Chess club? Anime Club?
AZN club
What, did he ask you there again? :P And man, you have so little that there's only a single club... we have like 10 different clubs with hundreds of peoples in each lolz
The club's meeting tomorrow, that's why...heeeeelp. If I could go without it turning awkward I'd go. Plus next week I have the excuse not to go because of a concert so I'm good then.
Dunno you might as well go and if he confirms your suspicions and starts getting awkward you can shut him down hard so you don't have to worry about it again
Well, shut him down hard nicely.
I finally have a girlfriend! Though it feels weird calling her that, since she's my best friend and neither of us know anything about dating, so we are just continuing to do what we've been doing, hanging out/going to movies and such, but know with an actual name for it. Nothing could possibly ruin the rest of my day! ;D
I will move in with my angel tomorrow.
I have to sell my old apartment. :( I love this house, even though it's wayyy to big for me. 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms lol.
BUT, I get rid of the day care center downstairs. :DDDDDDDDDD Stupid noisy pokemonz...
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 20, 2012, 10:06:20 AMI will move in with my angel tomorrow.
I have to sell my old apartment. :( I love this house, even though it's wayyy to big for me. 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms lol.
BUT, I get rid of the day care center downstairs. :DDDDDDDDDD Stupid noisy pokemonz...
...before getting married?
Forgive TZP for asking awkward question.
loool you Americans ::)
In here marriage usually comes after moving in with your partner.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 20, 2012, 11:42:10 PMloool you Americans ::)
In here marriage usually comes after moving in with your partner.
Wait, you not american?
I come from Bejing.
Ni hao.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 20, 2012, 11:42:10 PMloool you Americans ::)
In here marriage usually comes after moving in with your partner.
It usually does here, too.
TZP is cray.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on October 20, 2012, 11:48:31 PMI come from Bejing.
Ni hao.
I didn't know that there was a place called Bejing in Finland.
that's because it's in the chinatown of finland
*Mind is blown*
Quote from: ETFROXX on October 21, 2012, 12:08:59 AMIt usually does here, too.
TZP is cray.
Not necessarily supposed to....
It's a difference of morals. I personally wouldn't move in with my partner until we were married either. TZP is not cray.
It is a very common thing for a couple in the US to move in together before marriage, heavily evidenced in popular culture as well as actuality.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on October 21, 2012, 01:14:58 PMIt is a very common thing for a couple in the US to move in together before marriage, heavily evidenced in popular culture as well as actuality.
I know. It just seems like marriage actually forces people to think about the commitments they make, as opposed to just rushing into a huge relationship.
So what are all of your opinions on making a relationship "facebook official"?
Personally, I think it's unnecessary, frivolous even, to be required to let your 200+ "friends" know that you are dating someone before its acknowledged by the public. I suppose that's just the society we live in, but if two people want to be together, why do we need to advertise it on facebook?
BECAUSE IT DOESN'T MATTER IF ITS NOT ON FACEBOOK. GOSH
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on October 28, 2012, 05:32:51 PMSo what are all of your opinions on making a relationship "facebook official"?
Personally, I think it's unnecessary, frivolous even, to be required to let your 200+ "friends" know that you are dating someone before its acknowledged by the public. I suppose that's just the society we live in, but if two people want to be together, why do we need to advertise it on facebook?
Well, if you have any crazy stalker "friends" on Facebook thatare über into you and are like obsessing about you and want to have your babies, then I would think telling the world (if not mostly them) that you are TAKEN. Granted, that would only really work if you didn't know who your crazy stalker was. But also, then others wouldn't know if you were lying or what.
Just an opinion I'd throw out there. I personally don't care either way.
EDIT: Ninja'd.
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on October 28, 2012, 05:32:51 PMSo what are all of your opinions on making a relationship "facebook official"?
Personally, I think it's unnecessary, frivolous even, to be required to let your 200+ "friends" know that you are dating someone before its acknowledged by the public. I suppose that's just the society we live in, but if two people want to be together, why do we need to advertise it on facebook?
SFK's right. Sure. Why not. Unless it's a secret. But it's not a big deal. It's not like it's only official once you post it.
Wow, this thread was half way down the second page, guess everyone's love lives have been pretty good.
Mine sucks.
My girlfriend, Nicole, broke up with me today. She said, and I quote, "I think we should just be friends." This came out of nowhere, I had seen her earlier today and she gave no implications towards such action. She said that we would still be able to talk and hang out, but the dating part was awkward, as she said she likes me "as a really good friend." Now I'm rather sad. Even though I know she's still there, I feel like she's gone and I can't do anything about it.
^Women-we'll never understand them. Sorry to hear that.
Ummmmmmm okay...relationships...okay...hold on...relationships...okay...gimme a sec...uh...hmmm.
Once I hugged a girl. That counts, right?
Quote from: BonusPwnage on November 27, 2012, 06:44:15 PM^Women-we'll never understand them.
This coming out from a 14-year old? Just saying. >.>
I can't say that I would know anything about relationships, but maybe you two weren't meant to each other. There will be someone else, I'm sure of it. Sorry Sheikah and better luck next time.
Quote from: Waddle Bro on November 27, 2012, 07:01:47 PMThis coming out from a 14-year old? Just saying. >.>
I can't say that I would know anything about relationships, but maybe you two weren't meant to each other. There will be someone else, I'm sure of it. Sorry Sheikah and better luck next time.
Wisdom can come from the most unlikely of places...
Quote from: Waddle Bro on November 27, 2012, 07:01:47 PMThis coming out from a 14-year old? Just saying. >.>
We were all 14 once...once.
I was madly in love with a girl once, but that whole thing fell to shit. Hahaha, that's actually a big part of the reason I joined the site! Wow...I never realized that if I hadn't broken up with that chick, I might have never joined NSM....how terrible!
NSM>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>my ex.
Quote from: Waddle Bro on November 27, 2012, 07:01:47 PMThis coming out from a 14-year old? Just saying. >.>
I can't say that I would know anything about relationships, but maybe you two weren't meant to each other. There will be someone else, I'm sure of it. Sorry Sheikah and better luck next time.
You're 14 too bro, both of you, shut up.
I feel like any rebuttal to the situation would make me look like a desperate fool, lying to myself about the past, but I know that one day, when the awkwardness is gone, we will be together again, I'm sure of it.
(says the fool)
Im almost fifteen guys! Be happy for me :P
And sheikah sorry but Ive got no advice for you. All the relationships in my school are so ridiculous that even the teachers make fun of the couples.
On another note, are guys always as extremely obvious (and silly) as to when they like a girl, or is that just the guys in my school
Quote from: Bubbles7689 on November 27, 2012, 08:09:27 PMOn another note, are guys always as extremely obvious (and silly) as to when they like a girl, or is that just the guys in my school
ha. ha ha.
ha.
sigh
Quote from: BonusPwnage on November 27, 2012, 06:44:15 PM^Women-we'll never understand them. Sorry to hear that.
Ummmmmmm okay...relationships...okay...hold on...relationships...okay...gimme a sec...uh...hmmm.
Once I hugged a girl. That counts, right?
why does everyone think women are super mysterious and cryptic when it comes to relationships oh my god men can be that way too
stop applying it just to women
Quote from: Nebbles on November 27, 2012, 09:36:55 PMwhy does everyone think women are super mysterious and cryptic when it comes to relationships oh my god men can be that way too
stop applying it just to women
Agreed -.-
Quote from: Nebbles on November 27, 2012, 09:36:55 PMwhy does everyone think women are super mysterious and cryptic when it comes to relationships oh my god men can be that way too
stop applying it just to women
This was exactly what I was thinking.
Quote from: Nebbles on November 27, 2012, 09:36:55 PMwhy does everyone think women are super mysterious and cryptic when it comes to relationships oh my god men can be that way too
stop applying it just to women
I wasn't, that's just how it is around where I live.
Quote from: Waddle Bro on November 27, 2012, 07:01:47 PMThis coming out from a 14-year old? Just saying. >.>
I'm not trying to be some all-powerful swami or anything, I'm just talking from my own experiences.
It sounded like you were. I'm not going to continue with this, but that's not a good mindset to have. Just saying.
Quote from: Nebbles on November 28, 2012, 02:04:57 PMIt sounded like you were. I'm not going to continue with this, but that's not a good mindset to have. Just saying.
I know that's how it sounded, that's why I was trying to say that's not how I meant it to sound. I'm not going to continue this either (*gasp* we must be twins) because I didn't think everyone would get so worked up over one comment. By the way, it's not a mindset, it's a choice, out of a couple. Depending upon the situation one is in, one should respond to their surroundings appropriately, instead of blindly following an expression they heard the day beforehand.
Very sorry to hear that, Sheikah :( This might cheer you up, and is relevant:
Hahaha Blimey Cow videos are pretty entertaining
^True dat.
Eric
wat r u doin
Eric
stahp
One day when I was going home from university I saw the most perfect girl ever. There is this walking path which has two long flowerbeds on each side. That girl was walking on the edge of the other flowerbed. JUST HOW CUTE IS THAT. Little kids do stuff like that but 20~ years old girl? So goddamn cute...that was the woman of my life. Never saw her face tho but she had brown shoulder length hair, long coat, hat and mittens. Even with this information I haven't seen her again, I guess. If only I had seen her face ; _ ;.
SPEAKING OF RELATIONSHIPS.
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO MY MAJESTICAL AMAZING HUSBAND. ILU. YOU'RE MY FAVE (AND ONLY) HUSBAND. It has been 4 fabulous years. And here's to many more. *cheers* <4
btw hugos my husband
ditto
First is the worst, Second is the best.
So I may have done something very stupid
Or I may have gotten a girlfriend
Isn't that the same thing?
Sounds about right, good luck, you'll need it.
Quote from: shadowkirby on January 09, 2013, 07:47:21 PMSo I may have done something very stupid
Or I may have gotten a girlfriend
Same thing. But good job, bro.
Speaking of relationships, my bassist just got his first girlfriend and my other friend started getting really weird about it, especially the part where he was basically saying, "OMG, UR GONNA HAVE SEX AND STUFF. SEXSEXSEX." with his girlfriend in the same conversation.AND APPARENTLY I'M THE WEIRD ONE for thinking that's a little pervy and such. This same friend also is one of those guys whose entire personality revolves around his fascination with his own sexual conquests, even though ever girl he's ever slept with is FUCKING INSANE. LIKE, I'M SERIOUS. BATSHIT MOTHER FUCKING CRAZY.
I hate young people.
I has a problem. There's one girl who obviously has a crush on me. I like her too but the thing is that I don't really want a girlfriend. Or I'd rather say that I don't think that I'm capable of having a relationship. I've always thought that I would be a lousy boyfriend. Most of the time I just want to be alone and she would probably want to hang out as much as possible. But I don't want to reject her either if it comes to that she confesses her feelings to me straight and clear. Part of me still isn't totally against of the idea of having a relationship. Sometimes it feels like a right thing to do and sometimes it feels just way too complicated.
Why is it impossible for me to be just good friends with any girl goddammit.
Quote from: GaryOak on January 16, 2013, 06:18:36 AMI has a problem. There's one girl who obviously has a crush on me. I like her too but the thing is that I don't really want a girlfriend. Or I'd rather say that I don't think that I'm capable of having a relationship. I've always thought that I would be a lousy boyfriend. Most of the time I just want to be alone and she would probably want to hang out as much as possible. But I don't want to reject her either if it comes to that she confesses her feelings to me straight and clear. Part of me still isn't totally against of the idea of having a relationship. Sometimes it feels like a right thing to do and sometimes it feels just way too complicated.
Why is it impossible for me to be just good friends with any girl goddammit.
I would go for it. Tell her you'd need some time alone she'd probably understand. You'll never know unless you try. If it works, great, if not than you've gained some relationship experience.
I was in similar situations a few times. And I really regret not acting on it. I'd recommend going for it, regrets suck.
Quote from: GaryOak on January 16, 2013, 06:18:36 AMI has a problem. There's one girl who obviously has a crush on me. I like her too but the thing is that I don't really want a girlfriend. Or I'd rather say that I don't think that I'm capable of having a relationship. I've always thought that I would be a lousy boyfriend. Most of the time I just want to be alone and she would probably want to hang out as much as possible. But I don't want to reject her either if it comes to that she confesses her feelings to me straight and clear. Part of me still isn't totally against of the idea of having a relationship. Sometimes it feels like a right thing to do and sometimes it feels just way too complicated.
Why is it impossible for me to be just good friends with any girl goddammit.
Relevant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXmLRHnoSAs
I guess you guys are right. This is something I would be very regretful about if I don't act at all.
Quote from: Shadoninja on January 16, 2013, 07:49:02 AMRelevant
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tXmLRHnoSAs
Now I am officially terrified.
Ugh, so Dani (my girlfriend) and I have been getting in these little stupid arguments all day.
She plays League of Legends and tends to ignore my texts throughout the day which after a while gets really annoying. So I told her why, and she starts finding ways that it isn't her fault, blaming it on "my phone." I've been texting Slow all day so it's not my phone. Ugh, and shes been picking fights all day. Shes not on her period btw (for those with early speculations), and I don't know what to do. Shes been doing this often and it's getting overwhelming. What do I do...
Quote from: MassiveMayhem on February 08, 2013, 09:46:52 PMShes not on her period btw (for those with early speculations),
Considering its been proven that the menstrual cycle has no actual effect on a woman's emotions(other than being pissed off because of getting cramps and such), I'd say that rules it out as a possible reason.
Mabye somethings bothering her. Or maybe her LOL games are just getting super intense.
My name is The Boy Who Cried Wolf, I am single and looking for a girlfriend.
Lol jk XD
It's just one of those things that blow over overnight, so it's no big deal. Just frustrating.
Well she was obviously bothered by something, what's worse is that she wouldn't tell me. It's ok though we're fine.
I'm like Forever Alone AND Good Guy Kelsey over hurr...
Turns out somebody told Ayla I liked her, so when I noticed her kinda acting down on Facebook tonight, she confronted me about it, very smartly (albeit on Facebook). So I explained everything to her, from the fact that I had begun to like her from the beginning of the semester to my plan to have asked her to prom. She took it all very well. I explained how the fact she liked another guy would look bad on my part if I asked her anyway (I also took into account the feeling of the guy, as apparently he liked her back :o).
Because of this conversation, which was the BEST rejection I've ever gotten from a girl i liked, I feel like we respect each other more because of the revelation. I swear, her reaction to the truth, and the way she understood what I was explaining to her just made me want to like her more...even though she asked me to try not to like her anymore (How one does that is beyond me)...no matter. We're still great friends, and that's all that matters.
For those that don't know, I've actually lost a few great friends bacause I told them I liked them. One of which virtually saved my life just this past April. the same weekend I met her, too...sigh.
I'll be forever alone. Yet, I'll forever be the good guy.
*claps* What a good man
And once again... MOVE TO SOUTH JERSEY DAMMIT
Hang in there sport. One day you'll look back on these high school escapades with nostalgic, smiling amusement and fondness.
You're young, it happens. The fact that she liked somebody else and he liked her in return meant you didn't have much of a shot anyway. At least you got all that off of your chest, which makes you feel better in the long run.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 09, 2013, 11:00:14 PMHang in there sport. One day you'll look back on these high school escapades with nostalgic, smiling amusement and fondness.
Melancholy quote FTW.
Quote from: Bubbles7689 on February 09, 2013, 10:58:57 PM*claps* What a good man
And once again... MOVE TO SOUTH JERSEY DAMMIT
thanks ::)
And Bubbles, will you please take me back? I promise not to stray too far anymore (even though I'm technically still on hiatus).
EDIT: Ninja'd
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 09, 2013, 11:03:44 PMYou're young, it happens. The fact that she liked somebody else and he liked her in return meant you didn't have much of a shot anyway. At least you got all that off of your chest, which makes you feel better in the long run.
true, true. but women are frivolous and change their minds alot. just days before that, she was moping about how she saw his arm around another girl...it was his sister xD
Yes, so look on the brighter side: Rebound!
That's actually a very unhealthy attitude, don't do that. I was just going for the joke.
Quote from: Kman96 on February 09, 2013, 11:05:46 PMAnd Bubbles, will you please take me back? I promise not to stray too far anymore (even though I'm technically still on hiatus).
Fine, but only because you asked nicely.
ignoring nthe fact that he went after another woman when we were engaged
Quote from: Kman96 on February 09, 2013, 10:56:41 PMTurns out somebody told Ayla I liked her
Murder them.
guise it will be valentine's day soon
Start asking your Valentine's!
Take a train from NYC and then fall in love with a super pretty girl you see on the other side of you on the seating.
Then buy her some ice cream and date her and marry her and live happily ever after.
And if that doesn't work, you've probably met Ruto, Saria, and me, so who cares about love???
Anyhow, everything will be fine, Kman96. To be quite honest, I feel it's too early for you to fall in love yet. I would recommend waiting until after college or once you have a vocation. That way, you'll have a much better idea of what you're doing in life and are set in necessities. Not to mention (and I mean no offense by this, since it applies to mostly everyone) that you'll be both mentally and emotionally mature by then. You'll be able to mitigate your feelings and rationalise them to an extent. Love isn't a huge movie; we're living reality, which is much different. Your plan to ask her to prom may have been ideal, but it wasn't necessarily utilitarian. Speaking to her about it was a much better direction, I feel, so I'm glad you ended up going that route.
Anyhow, if you want my philosophy on all of this, I don't think you should pursue a relationship. I never quite understood the purpose of gong through some awkward phase in which one asks another to be a boyfriend or girlfriend. I feel that if you're truly close to someone, you never should need to go through that phase. It'll be greyed out. So long as you both enjoy being with each other, your relationship will progress without either's urging. The best way to find something is by not looking for it at all, after all.
And if worse comes to worst, you always have us to love... if you know what I mean. ;)
Single Awareness Day coming up! This will be my 21st consecutive!
Yay for studying in a place with twice as many boys as girls...
ill date you cobraroll
Just tell everyone you and your valentine are inseparable
Because your valentine is your hand
Quote from: Cobraroll on February 10, 2013, 02:48:26 PMYay for studying in a place with twice as many boys as girls...
Twice as many, wow. I can only dream of that good a ratio.
hohoh...valentine's day....wooo....time to spend time with my video games and cuddle up with them :P
You know what sucks. The fact that this song is the story of my life.
Reel Big Fish ftw
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on February 12, 2013, 04:42:54 AMReelBig Fish ftw
Srsly best movie ever and beautiful music score
now?
Quote from: Mashi on February 10, 2013, 04:52:42 AMTake a train from NYC and then fall in love with a super pretty girl you see on the other side of you on the seating.
Then buy her some ice cream and date her and marry her and live happily ever after.
And if that doesn't work, you've probably met Ruto, Saria, and me, so who cares about love???
Anyhow, everything will be fine, Kman96. To be quite honest, I feel it's too early for you to fall in love yet. I would recommend waiting until after college or once you have a vocation. That way, you'll have a much better idea of what you're doing in life and are set in necessities. Not to mention (and I mean no offense by this, since it applies to mostly everyone) that you'll be both mentally and emotionally mature by then. You'll be able to mitigate your feelings and rationalise them to an extent. Love isn't a huge movie; we're living reality, which is much different. Your plan to ask her to prom may have been ideal, but it wasn't necessarily utilitarian. Speaking to her about it was a much better direction, I feel, so I'm glad you ended up going that route.
Anyhow, if you want my philosophy on all of this, I don't think you should pursue a relationship. I never quite understood the purpose of gong through some awkward phase in which one asks another to be a boyfriend or girlfriend. I feel that if you're truly close to someone, you never should need to go through that phase. It'll be greyed out. So long as you both enjoy being with each other, your relationship will progress without either's urging. The best way to find something is by not looking for it at all, after all.
And if worse comes to worst, you always have us to love... if you know what I mean. ;)
Poetry
TL;DR JUB3R7 EXPLAINS HOMESTUCK TROLL ROMANCE.
Homestuck makes love so much more complicated once it explains troll romance (alien race in different universe)
Spoilers because large amounts of text so all of your ships can multiply exponentially.
The four quadrants are:
Spoiler
Matespritship, the flushed quadrant ♥
Moirallegiance, the pale quadrant ♦
Auspisticism, the ashen quadrant ♣
Kismesissitude, the caliginous quadrant â™
Matespritship and moirallegiance are part of the red romance (redrom) group, which means that they revolve around more positive emotions. Auspisticism and kismesissitude, on the other hand, belong to the black romance (blackrom) group, which means that they revolve around more negative emotions. Matespritship and kismesissitude are part of the concupiscent group, and revolve around more sensual emotions. Moirallegiance and auspisticism, on the other hand, are of the conciliatory group, and revolve around more platonic emotions.
Red Romance (Redrom)These types fall under the pity hemisphere of troll emotions, and are associated with the color red. They are tied to strongly positive emotions.
Matespritship/Flushed Quadrant ♥
Spoiler
The one most like human love/romance. Matesprits have a strong feeling of affection for one another - though troll psychology being what it is, courtship can be just as violent as that between kismeses, and indeed it can flail between one and the other. It is one of the two concupiscent relationships, those that deal with reproduction, the other being kismesissitude. Matespritships's quadrant is known as the flushed quadrant.
Moirallegiance/Pale Quadrant ♦
Spoiler
Moirallegiance is a process that occurs between a troll and their "moirail" (also informally known as a palemate). It is a form of guardianship, but it isn't simply about being platonic soul bros forever.
A troll is compelled by fate to watch over their moirail and keep them in line. Despite the platonic appearance of this role (as we currently understand it) to us humans, trolls consider it a type of romance. Moirallegiance may also entail pacifying one's partner if they would normally be dangerous to others or to themselves.
It is one of the two conciliatory relationships, the other being auspistice. As it is a redrom, it is linked to pity in the same way that black romance (blackrom) is linked to hate.
These types fall under the hate hemisphere, and are associated with the color black. They are tied to strongly negative emotions.
Auspisticism/Ashen Quadrant ♣
Spoiler
An auspistice is a "facilitator" of some sort between two others, mediating interactions between them and keeping their relationship functional.
Auspisticized pairs have been shown to be potentially caliginous to some degree, as the emotions between two auspisticized trolls are similar to those of kismeses but are interfered with by the auspistice. Unlike the other quadrants, ashen feelings have only been shown and have suggested to be only felt by the auspistice and not the two parties in the mediated relationship.
If the mediator does a poor job or is uninterested in keeping the peace, the two might delve into more torrid emotions, as stated above. Without auspistices, widespread black infidelity is guaranteed. It is one of the two conciliatory relationships, those more platonic to humans, the other being moirallegiance.
Kismesissitude/Caliginous Quadrant â™
Spoiler
This is what a troll feels towards someone known as their kismesis. This is linked to hatred, and it is necessary that both parties feel hatred towards each other. Not any kind of hatred will do, since there is such a thing as platonic hatred amongst trolls (similar to the human concepts of hatred and platonic love).
In other words, kismesissitude seems to be based on a mix of hatred and sexual attraction. As it thrives on a rivalry between two trolls, defeating or killing your kismesis is discouraged, since obviously there wouldn't be a relationship anymore. It is one of the two concupiscent relationships, those that deal with reproduction, the other being matespritship, and it has been shown that like with matespritship kissing is considered an appropriate expression of kismesissitude.
One might say that the most appropriate human concept which is somewhat synonymous to kismesissitude would be "potent arch-rivalry".
My good friends, it would appear that I have feelings for a girl. I do not know how to act upon these feelings, and therefore am feeling "butterflies" in my stomach. These feelings are also causing confusion, and a number of other unwelcome side effects. I really do wish that women were simpler.
Yeah, one of those side effects being that one of your friends hates me now. ::)
All in a day's work.
It's okay, I still love you <3
I am totally a jerk though. But I'm a lovable jerk. You two-timing bastard.
OH so that girl I met at teh Reel Big Fish concert. Well, it turns out she's already in a relationship,unfortunately. Her girlfriend looks very pretty.
My life in a nutshell, basically.
Punch her in the face. That's how I get all the ladies. And some men too.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 13, 2013, 10:34:49 PMPunch her in the face. That's how I get all the ladies. And some men too.
lol
So yesterday I asked a girl to dinner for Valentine's day. She threw her Iced Tea in my face.
If it was unsweetened, I'm sorry bro. If it was sweet tea, maybe she wants you to be her sweetheart.
Don't complain about me posting too personal stuff - I used a damn spoiler-tag, so it should be fine...:
Jompa's Interesting Valentine's Day Story
Read about the girl, and how much I hate her
I think I've mentioned the girl I DISLIKE, earlier (page 37, I think).
The whole "bullying" thing has stopped, and now she's just clingy. And I mean clingy as fuck!!!!!!! It's awful!
I know I will sound like a horrible person, but this what I think about her:
She is a horrible person. Totally just the worst person in my class. She's so fucking clingy!!!!!!!!!! She's NOT-funny - like anti-funny... She's an annoying freak with nothing better to do on her spare time than stalking ME..
And her outer appearance is bad as well:
She just smells awful, all the time. She's not good looking in the slightest. She's short (for what that's negative).
And I really should mention (since I'm in a music high school and all):
SHE IS THE WORST MUSICIAN I'VE EVER MET!!!!!! HOLY SHIT, IT IS JUST RIDICULOUS HOW BAD SHE IS!!!!!!
She plays the Viola, and is probably the worst Viola player ever considering being serious about music.
She is worse than "normal non-musical" people in music theory!!!!!!!!! That is pretty critical!!!
She is CONVINCED that she can sing, but she is actually the worst girl I've ever heard, and the whole "convinced" part just complicated things. She is a terrorist with her singing...
She is incompetent on the piano, even though we all have to take lessons. She is what you call "hopeless".
Hopeless...
Hopeless...
Hopeless...
And... she bought a saxophone, JUST so she could have me lecturing her about it privately.... D:
just... fuck her...
People do have a tendency to exaggerate.
BUT I ASSURE YOU: I am not exaggerating about all this.
There is no reason for me to even be tempted to like her. And with "like" I mean "not-dislike", not "like like", because atm I am close to slightly hate her.
Friends in my class obviously gets ideas. And I suspect that she's been going around spreading rumors that we're in a "complicated" relationship, because that's what I hear from people..
Pisses me off.
Every day for me is 40% about avoiding her! Yes, it's a part of my routine.
And her everyday-routine is 90% about searching for me!! It's true!!
She camps outside of school until I'm done with my classes, every fucking day.
Something she does that I just don't get is:
Since she always waits for me, we walk to the bus stop together, and take the same bus.
So we sit next to each other on the bus, where I actually have to hide my hands from her (CLINGY AS FUCK!!!!)
And then: After a couple of stops, 99% of the time I have to change bus, but she lives in the direction the bus goes.
So I have to get off, while she could just sit there, and get home quick and smoothly.
BUT NOOOO!!!!! She has to get of as well, so she can stay with me while I wait for the next bus D: D: D: D:
Jesus.... what's the point of that?!!
And all of this just because I helped her find her phone, the first day of school. After that she's obviously been in love with me.. D: Guh...
I have lots of love interests, but I'm not looking for a relationship AT ALL.
But when people (girls) get the wrong ideas, and think I'm with someone, they kinda start avoiding me.. Because you wouldn't want to have anything to do with someone's love-life right?
So even though I'm not going for any of the girls, it's still pretty sad to not be able to be friends with them.. The reason I'm not looking for a relationship is because of this..
So my world is to a great degree messed up, because of her..
Besides I wouldn't dare to get a girlfriend. I have some friends who would NOT accept that :P And my ex would be furious.
The story is in the other Spoiler-tag.
Story:
Now, the story:
read the stuff above
Lets call her "Girl X".
Girl X came to me this morning, in english class, and asked if I was done at school at 14:45.
And that is actually the time I'm done on normal thursdays, because I have saxophone as my last subject.
I was a bit surprised (though, she stalks me) that she knew such a detailed time, because 14:45 isn't a very normal time to end classes at my school, and I didn't even know when I was finished myself (I don't really pay attention to the time).
If you've read the stuff above, you know that a lot of my everyday-life is about avoiding her.
So what came out of my mouth as an answer, was "No".
I don't know why I lied, but I guess it has become a reflex for me.
I think we left that at that, because our teacher started talking.
Nothing else than "how did she know the time" crossed my mind..
[Important for the story]
The first thing my teacher did when she came in, and everyone was listening, was to bring up a letter.
The letter was from a girl that is in our class, but have only been at school for three days or so..
No one had heard from her since the day she stopped coming, and she haven't been answering any messages when we've tried to reach her..
The letter said something like this:
"Dear class.
Sorry I haven't been to school in a while.
I've had some issues in my life and therefore been unable to come, but I'll probably be back in a couple of weeks.
I hope you will enjoy these lollipops!"
Along with the letter, the girl had send 32 lollipops - one for each of us in the class.
So we all loved her for a moment, and ate the lollipops.
[/Important for the story]
Back to Girl X:
(In my school; we split up the school day in four "sessions")
Now, I didn't speak to Girl X much the next two sessions.
That was not coincidental - I had to run away from her when recess started between second and third session.
So I just played some saxophone in a rehearsal room. But I later found out that she was watching through the window from the outside...
After third session, which was math (and I don't have math with her), I started walking down to the rehearsal room where I have saxophone lesson.
AND SHE WAS WAITING OUTSIDE.... SHE HAS PIANO ON THE FOURTH FUCKING FLOOR!!!!! WHY WOULD SHE COME ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE BASEMENT!!!!!!???!?!?! .......
So there we stood. I was just waiting for the fifteen minutes to pass, and she was just there....
Then she asked again: Wether or not I was done 14:45.
And I knew I were; since she had asked earlier..
This time I answered "yes", because I knew she would start investigating if I said I had some more classes or something - BESIDES: She would just camp outside for me anyways.... -.-
Then she said that she wanted me to wait for her until she was done 15:00.
Now, if I were to say "no" I wouldn't really be able to back it up with a reason (other than hating her), so I said fine.
Waiting to go into the room was awful, because I had to stand there with her, and every minute together with her gives me the creeps, and gives her pleasure..
Then some guy from our class walked by, and she started talking a bit to him, because they were apparently supposed to have their piano lesson together.
This was my chance!
I grabbed my sax, and walked behind her towards the room where I was supposed to have my lesson, and knocked on the door (even though I was still two minutes early, and probably pissed of my sax teacher, who were in the middle of lunch..).
As a sort of "notice" that I was going inside, I told Girl X "goodbye", while she was still in conversation with the other guy..
That's when:
She turned away from him, and said: "See you afterwards, right?"
I don't know about in English, but in Norwegian THAT IS A FUCKING WEIRD THING TO SAY!!
OF COURSE it didn't come as a surprise, since she's stalking me full-time and all, but that is a fucking weird thing to say, really..
"Yeah," I responded with half my body inside the rehearsal room. I was actually hoping to avoid keeping my promise, but that wasn't an option anymore.. I couldn't just "forget" anymore.
After my sax hour, I was prepared to meet her and walk/bus home with her. So I went outside the main entrance, and was now leaning towards a wall or something with my sax on my shoulder.
I took up my iPhone and went on Facebook, to see if there was anything new:
That's when I saw the notification that someone had posted a picture on the "1996 musicians on Foss"-page, which is the page where every music student in the first year are a members. We are two music classes (33+33).
The picture was of a boy and a girl in my class. And they were eating lollipops.
The picture came with text:
"Hah take that 1E (my class is 1F and the other class is 1E)!
We get to eat Valentine's Day lollipops sent from our beloved classmate, while you get nothing blah blah blah..."
That's when I realized:
The reason the absent girl sent us lollipops (which literally translates to "love" in norwegian), was because..
TODAY IS VALENTINE'S DAY!!
I am not an idiot. I understood that the reason Girl X, the girl that is in love with me, was so desperate to walk home with me after school, was because today is Valentine's Day, and she's the type to consider this day sacred, so I figured she wanted to express her feeling in a matter..
EXATCLY 15:00 I pressed "send" and sent her the message I had written.
It said:
"Come now, I have really really really bad time today! If you don't hurry, I'll have to leave without you." <-- in norwegian of course..
I was hoping she wouldn't turn up.
I decided to give her five minutes, and start walking exactly 15:05 if she didn't show.
I was praying inside that she wouldn't turn up.
But it's Girl X we're talking about here. She wouldn't miss out on this for the world.
15:01 she pushed the door open, and we immediately started walking.
The excuse I came up with to "have bad time today" was that a friend of mine was supposed to leave town and I had to hurry to fetch my Cornet that was lying at his place.
Normal routine from here on:
- Walking to the bus stop.
- Waiting for the bus.
- Sitting on the bus.
- Hiding my hands from her - though she managed to fetch my left hand when I wasn't paying attention.
- Departing from the bus - even though she lives where the bus is going.
- Walking to the stop across the street, and waiting for the next bus with her
When I was within range of reading what said on the electronic notice board above the bus stop, I could read when the next bus would come:
9 minutes!?
Why are there so few busses at this hour!?
Now, for what we've been waiting for:
She dragged me away from people, and over to a place where there there wren't any people standing waiting for the bus.
I'm not gonna start a detailed explanation of how it went down, but she super-formally confessed.
I think she was trying to make me feel like I had no choice.
She just told me that she had liked, no LOVED, me since the first time she spoke with me.
And after talking for a long time (four minutes actually, according to the bus-noticeboard-thingy), she was finished.
She made it very clear that she had some personal fantasies that we were already a couple, and wanted everything to be as they were, just a little more intimate.
I hadn't been saying anything during it all.
I had been trying to maintain a face that didn't "show" how I felt about it all.
----------------
I'm kinda expecting this to be a feature every girl has:
When you say: "No, I don't like you" --> They wanna know WHY!?
----------------
I'm not gonna go into detail about how she nagged me about "WHY?" after this, but...
I got a bit stressed out. I GOT PISSED!!.. ...you could say.
And since I deep down straight up DISLIKE her;
I did the "foolish" thing of telling her how I really felt.
The phrase "I mildly hate you" came up more than it should have. Please don't judge me..
That is how I feel about her. I do mildly hate her.
She tried to touch me, so I backed up.
Then she tried to embrace me, so I grabbed her arms and held them away from me.
Now, at this point we were standing rather close to each other. Almost in an embrace.
THIS IS WHEN SHE TRIED TO KISS ME..
I shouted right in her face: "Stop it!"
And tried to push her away, but now she had grabbed by arms, and again tried to embrace me.
I took control again by grabbing her arms the way I had before, and shouted more to her.
"Stop it! I don't like you, go away!"
Her subconscious monster awakened:
We were still standing very close SOOOO... She head-butted me!
Then ran off crying.
She probably hurt her head a bit, but when she hit my forehead she managed to get a direct hit on my only pimple, leaving me in intense pain, bleeding from my forehead. It still hurts really bad, and I think she might've left me with a small scar..
That's it..
That's how it went down.
I'm very relieved, finally being able to tell her how I really feel, since she's been having ideas and stuff, and I've had to keep it a secret.
I don't think of this as such a bad thing at all.
And the best thing about this is that I am actually HAPPY it all turned out like the crazy mess it did!
Because now I probably don't have to talk to her ever again.
So... *smiley face* :D
Call me an asshole if you must. Please.
Holy fuck I don't know whether to cry or laugh
I almost cried and I also burst out laughing
That's a fantastic story, whatever comes of the situation. I doubt she's going to just leave you alone.
I would apologize for overreacting but also let her know you aren't interested. She did confess her love for you, even if you hate her you owe her that.
Oh my god. I. I dont even know what to say.
Are people actually that INSANE?
It is some story, huh? :)
I think she might come to me tomorrow being all like, "can we please stay friends" or something like that.
Slow, in my whole "explanation" to her about how I felt, I did apologize to her quite a lot, and made it very clear in an easy-to-understand-way that I don't like her, though some sharp words like "mildly hate" came up a lot.
I don't wanna sound mean (like I can go back now..), but the only reason the situation turned out like it did is because she was shocked and got pissed, and as I said, I'm glad, because this might mean she'll stay away from me from now on.. ..might... :P
Cool story bro.
Laughed hard. XD
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 13, 2013, 10:22:33 PMMy good friends, it would appear that I have feelings for a girl. I do not know how to act upon these feelings, and therefore am feeling "butterflies" in my stomach. These feelings are also causing confusion, and a number of other unwelcome side effects. I really do wish that women were simpler.
*squeals*
but its not ayla right
no
it's someone who I think Kman used to like?
That story, combined with your avatar, Jompa, screams:
I'm from an Anime. Listen to the Story of my People.
Seriously.
Good God, I can't begin to tell you how scripted that all seemed. Are you sure there aren't hidden cameras around you, you may be on a hidden reality show.
^My thoughts exactly! xD
No, but it is true! I'm sorry my day was so unbelievable!
My avatar doesn't have anything to do with this, does it?
And I really wouldn't be able to come up with that on my own, I lack fantasy!
I believe you, I just found it funny that it sounded so scripted.
I guess you're right.
Okay, my problem with lesbinism apparently having a war on my love life is bad, but this is just FUCKING BRUTAL.
I am very sorry for you Jompa, but at least you have a bunch of awesome stories to come from this girl.
Oh, I'm happy, SFK :)
Maybe she'll finally take a hint. XD
Well she head butted him, so that's doubtful.
She's done that some times in the past, as well, but then it was just one of her ways of being clingy (yes, she is that weird). This time it was much more violent.
Though I think it felt worse for me than was intended, since she bullseyed my pimple DX
She's headbutted you BEFORE? As in, this wasnt the FIRST time?
Yes, but that wasn't intended to hurt me, i think? Idk what goes on with her head..
My locker is right where her desk is, so she used to headbutt me when I had to bend over right next to her..
Aaand I'm just now realizing how idiotic that sounds.. I am afraid I've gotten used to her being a total weirdo. D:
Quote from: Jompa on February 14, 2013, 02:08:19 PMYes, but that wasn't intended to hurt me, i think? Idk what goes on with her head..
My locker is right where her desk is, so she used to headbutt me when I had to bend over right next to her..
Aaand I'm just now realizing how idiotic that sounds.. I am afraid I've gotten used to her being a total weirdo. D:
It seems as if poor Jompa needs a "real" solution to this situation. D:
I suppose more talking won't help? Maybe talking with her parents or other family members?? Or do you not suppose those would make the situation any better?? :S
I just don't want anything to do with her.
Might be a little hard, since she's in my class, but I hope she also wants to keep some sorta distance..
I did actually get another confession, as well, by a (cute) girl from my old class.
She came to get of her chest that she likes me, and therefore she wants us to be friends like we were when we were in the same class.
But that just left me feeling friendzone'd.. :p
That was an...interesting story, to say the least. If I may add, I'm not to sure your problems are over, with the way things were left off, but at least she may keep some distance from now on.
"Some distance" is WAY better than how it originally was/is.
But now I feel like I am in a situation where I could tell her that I don't want to be around her, if I can build up the guts in such a situation, that is...
Dafuq did I just read
Oh well I guess you should've told her you didn't like her ages ago, that would've probably hurt her less. And she would've stopped stalking you earlier too.
Quote from: Jompa on February 14, 2013, 02:48:53 PMI just don't want anything to do with her.
Might be a little hard, since she's in my class, but I hope she also wants to keep some sorta distance..
Haha I'm going through something similar myself. I think it'll be fine as long as she doesn't keep pursuing you. The awkwardness will eventually dissipate.
Quote from: Jompa on February 14, 2013, 02:48:53 PMBut that just left me feeling friendzone'd.. :p
I've never understood that... you can't force people to like you more than just "as a friend"... :P
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 14, 2013, 05:11:31 PMHaha I'm going through something similar myself. I think it'll be fine as long as she doesn't keep pursuing you. The awkwardness will eventually dissipate.
Some people keep feelings (grudges, more like it :P) for quite some time, unfortunately...
@Jompa: O.O xDDDDDD WTF. LOLOLOLOL (too many emotions to express)
Today is Valentime's day. and I'm wearing all black, from head to toe (including my top hat!). Does anyone else find this symbolic???
Also, I printed this out and gave it to Ayla as a valentine:
(https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/7041477376/h3BAB1956/)
She absolutely adored it. She laughed her ass off after looking at it and every time she looked at it again, she laughed even harder. Before you say, "well maybe she was laughing at you and not the Valentine," don't. She would never do that, and I would be able to tell if she was being insincere. It was almost as if I had made her day, which made me happy, because the guy who apparently likes her hasn't asked her out yet, so I guess I'm just there to push her along while she waits...and I wait...either way, it was perfect and she loved it, making me pretty happy. Then Shadowkirby walked in out of nowhere...
Anyways,
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 14, 2013, 09:40:52 AMit's someone who I think Kman used to like?
yup. I was über obsessed with her in like 7th grade, and yeah, she's cute, and also a superNERD. like, nerdier than me and eric. and my nerdy, I mean like smart, not like geeky, but like ocd about grades. she's incredibly attractive yes, but we're just friends now :)
uhhhh...and I told shadow this, but I had an inkling she may like me...the past week has been interesting.
in all, black equals no soul valentines, chainsaw bears are romantic, and smart hot girl.
My favorite valentine I saw today:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2F1a91970ec008d05dcdf69002b3702e75%2Ftumblr_mhx1moggZA1qik7k6o1_1280.jpg&hash=a89aca16938ecd02462ea14c4ee9bafbef29cac1)
Best valentine I've seen. Ever.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 14, 2013, 07:59:50 PMMy favorite valentine I saw today:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F25.media.tumblr.com%2F1a91970ec008d05dcdf69002b3702e75%2Ftumblr_mhx1moggZA1qik7k6o1_1280.jpg&hash=a89aca16938ecd02462ea14c4ee9bafbef29cac1)
That...was the best thing I have seen today. XD
Quote from: Kman96 on February 14, 2013, 07:27:33 PMThen Shadowkirby walked in out of nowhere...
CLIFFHANGER
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi2.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F006%2F725%2Fdesk%2520flip.jpg&hash=b518b60ebed9945f738f3da89594388443931e29)
Spoiler
She didn't come to school today~
Hah, those Valentine's cards are great! :D
Quote from: Jompa on February 15, 2013, 07:30:32 AMSpoiler
She didn't come to school today~
Hah, those Valentine's cards are great! :D
Well, this story just gets bette and better!
Woah, indeed. :o
His story is something I could see in an anime or something, btw. :P
"The next day, Haruhi didn't come to school."
It's almost ridiculous and contrived enough for opera. Can I claim the rights to this story, if need be?
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 15, 2013, 08:28:34 AMIt's almost ridiculous and contrived enough for opera. Can I claim the rights to this story, if need be?
"You'd never get away with all this in a play, but if it's loudly sung and in a foreign tongue, it's just the sort of story audiences adore--in fact, the perfect opera!" (http://youtu.be/U0n04m__mJ0?t=2m30s)
Haha, that as an opera?! That could be very cool. :p
Quote from: Jompa on February 15, 2013, 07:30:32 AMHah, those Valentine's cards are great! :D
I saw this and thought the NSM valentines were done :(
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 15, 2013, 08:26:01 AM"The next day, Haruhi didn't come to school."
XDDD
Quote from: Jompa on February 15, 2013, 07:30:32 AMSpoiler
She didn't come to school today~
Probably suffering from self-induced depression. :P
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 15, 2013, 08:28:34 AMIt's almost ridiculous and contrived enough for opera. Can I claim the rights to this story, if need be?
'twould be a great show, Maestro, I am sure.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 15, 2013, 08:55:17 AM"You'd never get away with all this in a play, but if it's loudly sung and in a foreign tongue, it's just the sort of story audiences adore--in fact, the perfect opera!" (http://youtu.be/U0n04m__mJ0?t=2m30s)
;D
XDDDDDD That's hysterical. It really is absurd enough for something like that.
Jompa, are you okay?? I'd still be a bit traumatized.
I don't think I am traumatized :P
Aaahhhhhh wwhhhhhyyyyyyy
What shadowkirby tell us your woes
^What he said
Yes, let us pass down our months of collective wisdom to you.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 20, 2013, 07:56:47 PMYes, let us pass down our months of collective wisdom to you.
It takes a village... uh, online community... to raise a... uh, solve your problems!! :P
No problems, just suspense. I told a girl I liked her, and I have no idea what she thinks!
Better than an instant rejection.
Then again maybe its just a postponed one.
/o\
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 20, 2013, 10:07:08 PMNo problems, just suspense. I told a girl I liked her, and I have no idea what she thinks!
I hate it when they have to answer later. 'The suspense is KILLING ME!' But yet again...he/she..would have to think about it and predict how the future might be.
I was rejected.
While I may not be entirely happy with the way things turned out, you know what?
I'm going to get back up, and continue on with life. I'll hopefully run into someone else down the road, and this whole thing will start over again like it always does. And who knows? Maybe things will turn out better next time.
Wow, great job being positive, Shadow! I'm sure you will! :D
Tough it out bro, I feel for you :( At least you were brave enough to try, right?
Yup! :D
Good think brah! The future is what only matters :P
Hopefully this wall of text won't scare people away--
One of my best friends is a girl. We met in 8th grade and in 10th grade she asked me out. I refused, because I felt like we were just friends. 4 years later we've both matured and I don't get along with / have as much fun with anyone as well as I do with her. We check in with each other weekly to see how the college experience is going and just to chat. When I go home for summer/winter breaks, we hang out all the time. My mom has jokingly claimed her as one of her kids because of how much we hang out and how our families get along with each other.
The simple way of putting it is that I am undeniably attracted to her personality. We both have the same sense of humor, value our academics, love outdoor activities, mock each other at every possible moment... She's honestly that kind of person I would want to be with for the rest of my life.
The issue I'm facing is that I'm not physically attracted to her in the least. I feel shallow saying how that affects my decision. But at the same time, it really is important that a couple loves each other inside and out. She's not obese, but she is bigger than most girls. Nothing stands out to me that says "wow you're beautiful" like has happened with girls in past relationships. Even the thought of kissing her grosses me out a little.
I don't know. Has anyone felt like this before? There is no one I would rather spend time with, but I also don't feel attracted to her. I know she still likes me... but I also don't want a relationship to ruin the friendship we have. Irl friends think I should do it. They argue that it'll be a long search to find someone who I'm just as compatible with. It's a really hard decision-- whether or not to pursue this.
Quote from: spitllama on February 27, 2013, 01:45:26 PMThe simple way of putting it is that I am undeniably attracted to her personality. We both have the same sense of humor, value our academics, love outdoor activities, mock each other at every possible moment... She's honestly that kind of person I would want to be with for the rest of my life.
The issue I'm facing is that I'm not physically attracted to her in the least. I feel shallow saying how that affects my decision. But at the same time, it really is important that a couple loves each other inside and out. She's not obese, but she is bigger than most girls. Nothing stands out to me that says "wow you're beautiful" like has happened with girls in past relationships. Even the thought of kissing her grosses me out a little.
I don't know. Has anyone felt like this before? There is no one I would rather spend time with, but I also don't feel attracted to her. I know she still likes me... but I also don't want a relationship to ruin the friendship we have. Irl friends think I should do it. They argue that it'll be a long search to find someone who I'm just as compatible with. It's a really hard decision-- whether or not to pursue this.
In my opinion, if you like her personality- absolutely love it- that should be enough. If you decide that you merely want to remain friends with her, that's fine (friendships such as that are a great asset for both of you), but just realize that physical attraction is not the
only part of a true relationship, something that many people in our modern times (and even in the past) fail to recognize.
Your friends are right, in a way, but in the end, the decision is yours.
As much as I hate how much physical appearance rules over us, I'm afraid that is an important factor. You can't marry a girl whom you can't kiss without being grossed out.
I disagree with your irl friends. If you're not physically attracted to her at all the relationship would likely end up hurting both of you badly and ruining your friendship. Especially if you really meant...
Quote from: spitllama on February 27, 2013, 01:45:26 PMThe issue I'm facing is that I'm not physically attracted to her in the least. I feel shallow saying how that affects my decision. But at the same time, it really is important that a couple loves each other inside and out. She's not obese, but she is bigger than most girls. Nothing stands out to me that says "wow you're beautiful" like has happened with girls in past relationships. Even the thought of kissing her grosses me out a little.
that last part.
You still see her as unattractive even after all those years? I've found that after I know someone for a week or so I don't even notice anymore. The only advice I can give is that under ABSOLUTELY NO CIRCUMSTANCES tell her this. Honesty is not always best when it comes to stuff like this, and I would rather not know because "ignorance is bliss"
I have a good friend who's a girl, I've known her for nearly all my life and we will always be friends.. It's one of those friends were you don't talk to much in school, don't meet up with but when you're ever with them you have so much fun.. Or is it just me that has that kind of friend?
Our families are close and that and when I was younger I use to plan out a secret wedding with her and I sort of sent her valentines cards but we would never go out with each other. I love her but as a friend.
I think that's what's happening with you (last sentence) you love her a lot but as a friend, like if she had a cardio arrest or whatever their called attack thingy you'd get her help and try your best to get her back but you wouldn't give her CPR... If that makes sense.
Quote from: Bubbles7689 on February 27, 2013, 02:34:14 PMThe only advice I can give is that under ABSOLUTELY NO CIRCUMSTANCES tell her this. Honesty is not always best when it comes to stuff like this, and I would rather not know because "ignorance is bliss"
Yeah! She'll headbutt you!
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 27, 2013, 02:31:18 PMAs much as I hate how much physical appearance rules over us, I'm afraid that is an important factor. You can't marry a girl whom you can't kiss without being grossed out.
It only rules over you if you let it... but then again, maybe I'm just "abnormal." Maybe I place too much trust in people...
I can understand if people are like this:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.idnq-guide.com%2Fimg%2Fmon%2Fboss%2Fxantan_2.gif&hash=281d9c87ae7054df2859a950765b1d98a049be94)
But I don't think people are like that. :P
Wait forget that last thing I said about CPR, a lot of people would give anyone CPR.. :L
@Bubbles lol no I won't say that to her. Don't worry.
Quote from: Bubbles7689 on February 27, 2013, 02:34:14 PMI've found that after I know someone for a week or so I don't even notice anymore.
That's exactly the state that I'm at. I'm like "meh" when I see her. I'm not thinking she's ugly or anything. But I feel like I should feel more than "meh" if I'm considering dating her :l
Quote from: The Boy Who Cried Wolf on February 27, 2013, 02:46:46 PMyou love her a lot but as a friend
That's a good way of putting it.
My opinion lately has been right with what Slow said. At the very least I'm going to give it some time. Thank you all for your input.
In my own experience, I've had two girlfriends who were "on the heavy side."
My girlfriend right now is not "slim." but she's honestly perfect for me. I always thought I liked skinny girls and yadadada, but really you begin to realize that most overweight girls have the heartiest personalities and are the best to be around, you can't deny it. And I do feel shallow saying it, I contemplated on dating her because of her weight (and a combination of not really wanted a girlfriend). But I'm glad I went for it, it's a year an one month right now. :)
If you honestly have feelings for your friend, go for it. You might love her more than you think.
Today, two weeks and one day after Valentine's Day...
Today, two weeks and one day after Valentine's Day - Girl X is back!
In the time space between then and now, we haven't spoken.
In normal circumstances speaking together at least once would seem inevitable, but the reason for this has been caused by many factors:
Firstly:
Valentine's Day happened on a Thursday, so that's the start of the time space.
And as I posted the day after; she didn't come to school on the Friday.
And then what happened was that the whole next week was winter break.
So the first time I saw her after Valentine's Day was that Monday, more than one weeks later!
Now, we didn't speak together Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday nor Thursday, but...
Today, Friday, she did:
Today's school day was like this:
- First session: Norwegian class
Nothing special regarding the Girl X situation..
- Second session: AML - Anvendt musikklære (translates to "music theory")
This is where she spoke to me:
Since I'm the class-, no, the school-genius when it comes to music, EVERYONE always comes to copy my homework before AML.
Even though she tried her hardest to act like a total bitch, she asked to see my homework. That's it. That's all there was.
- "Big Recess" - is what we call the 45 minute long recess between the second and the third sessions - basically, lunch.
We did go to the same store in the same kinda "group" of people, but nothing more.
- Third session: Language
I have Spanish, Girl X has German. So nothing happened here.
- Fourth session: English
Our teacher had to leave. So we got a ton of work we had to deliver online, before class was over.
What happened here was that she came to me, and said she wanted to work with me..?
And so we worked together. Ta-da.
- When class was over:
I was gonna walk to the tram station with a guy in my class, and Girl X came along!
I and Girl X take the bus so it wasn't long before we separated ways with the guy.
So when we were walking from the tram station to the bus stop, Girl X asked "whatever happened to our holding-hands-thing?"
WELL FUCK!!.... FUCK...
AND THE BEST REPLY I COULD COME UP WITH WAS "well, it's too cold for that now..." FFUUUUCK!!!!!
.....
....
So she stopped me and asked what I feel about her and I answered that I didn't think anything special of her.. -.- -.- .... -.-
And she also came with all that crap about her getting the "impression" that we were in love with each other and blah bla....
But I only said that I didn't think anything special of her, and that's not really the truth - I mean, I hate her!!
And then we took the bus together to where I have to get off.
She COULD just stay on the bus, because she lives where the bus goes, but NOOOOOOO.... she HAS to get off too, and wait with me...
So we did that, and I took the bus home, and here I am......
Fucking hell, I thought I was done with her... D:
Sounds like she's trying to repress any negativity she gets from you, there's something going on in her deep down that's probably very, very bad.
Omg she scares me.
Sounds like you just got a crazy on your hands. Only choice is to shut them down super hard imo. Just expunge all elements of the situation.
Then again she might just be delusional and never get over it.
Ya at this point she just thinks you're teasing her. It's time to have a sit-down conversation and be clear and adamant.
Headbutt her.
Quote from: spitllama on March 01, 2013, 12:16:54 PMYa at this point she just thinks you're teasing her. It's time to have a sit-down conversation and be clear and adamant.
This is probably the best solution. If not, though:
Quote from: The Boy Who Cried Wolf on March 01, 2013, 12:37:36 PMHeadbutt her.
That's a good one too. :P
Same, it kinda mmd
I feel like it's such a weird situation (in addition to it being weird, if that mad sense?), by which I mean: It has been over two weeks.
I mean, she MIGHT want me to like "forgive" her, or idk.
What I mean is, that I don't feel like I can do anything about her will to make me like her.
But I really don't want things to be like they are,
so if she keeps up being all crazy,
Quote from: The Boy Who Cried Wolf on March 01, 2013, 12:37:36 PMHeadbutt her.
I will consider!! :P
Whatever country you're from must really be strange, nothing like that would happen where I'm from. Heck, if it happened where my irish cousins are from you 2 would be snogging!
For whatever reason you snog someone where my cousins are from to see if you 2 should go out.. Usually they don't.
Norway's not strange,
it's the best damn place to live on earth <-- fact!
sorry, I just had to brag about my amazing country there...
jompa plz
everybody knows that finland is the best place to live
Food for thought:
How do you know when you love someone?
Told'cha she would return. -.-
Quote from: ETFROXX on March 02, 2013, 03:17:55 AMFood for thought:
How do you know when you love someone?
Step aside kids, FSM is here to answer this question.
You just do. There is no way to describe that feeling, but damn, it's the best feeling in the world to realize you love somebody.
FSM is actually secretly:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.hindujagruti.org%2Fdenigrations%2Fongoing%2Fimages%2Ftheloveguru.jpg&hash=9d8d1f4262198fc154a54c76159af16fca9c22f2)
I still don't understand how people hated this movie.
Anyways, I don't think anyone on this site really can understand what love means. Maybe if ya go ask someone whose been married to the same person for 40 or 50 years and is still happy to be with them what love is, they could really tell you. I think they would have a much better answer than a bunch of introverted, hormone crazed youngsters(aka The NSM Community)
Yes, but I was bored and curious as to what you guys thought.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on March 02, 2013, 07:00:22 AMYou just do. There is no way to describe that feeling, but damn, it's the best feeling in the world to realize you love somebody.
Hmmm... personally, it was the best feeling in the world when I beat Ruby Weapon after a few hours of summon-spamming (Hades kept it paralyzed, but you couldn't use it every single turn, I believe). :P
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 02, 2013, 11:27:39 AMAnyways, I don't think anyone on this site really can understand what love means. Maybe if ya go ask someone whose been married to the same person for 40 or 50 years and is still happy to be with them what love is, they could really tell you. I think they would have a much better answer than a bunch of introverted, hormone crazed youngsters(aka The NSM Community)
That depends on who specifically it is that you're asking.
What is love?
Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 03, 2013, 08:29:40 AMWhat is love?
Baby don't hurt me.
Don't hurt me.
No more.
<3
*headbangs*
...
*breaks car window*
DAMMIT!
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on March 01, 2013, 12:05:57 PMSounds like you just got a crazy on your hands. Only choice is to shut them down super hard imo. Just expunge all elements of the situation.
Then again she might just be delusional and never get over it.
Hahaha that's your advice for everything.
Bluntness is one of the most effective methods of getting your point across :D
You? Blunt?
Okay, in that case...guys drive me crazy enough to consider a life of celibacy. Lol.
Nah you'll get over your apprehension and realize we are just Too Cool 8)
Ugh, this is so strange but I think I might like a girl in first year... I'm in third year and well I never thought it would every happen I mean I think second years are ewwie and most first years are ewwww but she's so mature for her age and she's friends with loads of third year girls and we get on reallllly well. But what's a few problems?
She's too young at the moment
A lot of guys in my year 'would pump her mad' -.- and I try help her with this
Oh and She's my friends little sister!!
They've already jokingly been annoying me for 'chatting her up' (they don't know) but yeh, I still don't know if I actually do or if I just reaaaallly like her as a friend (at lunch I HAVE to talk to her, she's so fun to talk to!)
So yeh, how do I test out if I do like her or if it's just friends and will this or should this ever work out?
Right off the bat: First year and third year? Does that correspond to American 9th and 11th grade?
And 'too young?' What determines too young?
As in
First year = Freshman
Third year = Junior
I have a friend who started dating a girl when she was a freshman and he was a senior, and it is a little odd at first, but only assholes really make a fuss about that stuff, especially if it's committed relationship. Some of them are ehhhhhh(cuz, ya know older person taking advantage of younger person...sexually), but in a relationship between two respectable individuals committed to one another, age should not matter..unless..ya know...one of them's liek 6 or something. Then there might be an issue.
All I know is don't fall for a girl who hates video games, and video game music, and basically everything you like cus that didn't work out so well for me.
Well opposites attract...and end up very unhappy with each other.
Always date a person that has similar tastes to you. Or they'll just be a constant source of disappointment. There was a girl I was into in high school, and we got on talking about music and I asked the most important question I know of when seeing if I'm compatible with a girl: "Do you like Modest Mouse?"
"No, their music is really bad."(It was something like this)
And all attraction I had to her immediately vanished. You don't like Mouse, get out of the house. My ultimate motto in dating.
hahaha ^ is that soo?
Yeah I would go for someone who has very similar interests and has a good personality :P
and if you can beat them in Brawl with Pikachu you know your with the wrong girl.
Pikachu is fawking badass D:<
I know!! I don't get why people don't like pikachu, it's the best pokémon, aint it?
QuoteAfter third session, which was math (and I don't have math with her), I started walking down to the rehearsal room where I have saxophone lesson.
AND SHE WAS WAITING OUTSIDE.... SHE HAS PIANO ON THE FOURTH FUCKING FLOOR!!!!! WHY WOULD SHE COME ALL THE WAY DOWN TO THE BASEMENT!!!!!!???!?!?! .......
So there we stood. I was just waiting for the fifteen minutes to pass, and she was just there....
Then she asked again: Wether or not I was done 14:45.
And I knew I were; since she had asked earlier..
This time I answered "yes", because I knew she would start investigating if I said I had some more classes or something - BESIDES: She would just camp outside for me anyways.... -.-
Then she said that she wanted me to wait for her until she was done 15:00.
Now, if I were to say "no" I wouldn't really be able to back it up with a reason (other than hating her), so I said fine.
Waiting to go into the room was awful, because I had to stand there with her, and every minute together with her gives me the creeps, and gives her pleasure..
Then some guy from our class walked by, and she started talking a bit to him, because they were apparently supposed to have their piano lesson together.
This was my chance!
I grabbed my sax, and walked behind her towards the room where I was supposed to have my lesson, and knocked on the door (even though I was still two minutes early, and probably pissed of my sax teacher, who were in the middle of lunch..).
As a sort of "notice" that I was going inside, I told Girl X "goodbye", while she was still in conversation with the other guy..
That's when:
She turned away from him, and said: "See you afterwards, right?"
This EXACT SAME THING happened to me yesterday again...
Like the ABSOLUTELY EXACT same thing as the excerpt above!
But this time, I didn't wait for her.
When I was well on my way home (about when I had changed busses), she sent me a text, asking "where are you, did you leave already?" and I replied "oh sorry, I got out a bit early, and so I totally forgot about you, sorry about that"...
And then the unorthodox thing of her
not replying occurred, so I figured she got really mad.
Now, today:
She didn't speak to me AT ALL.
BUT....
After school finished, I decided to hang out there a bit longer, just to avoid bumping into her at the bus stop, or something.
There wouldn't be anything weird about staying behind as a lot of people usually do, because of the school revue, which is being held this week. So I just sat beside one of my classmates while he played some game on the PC, but the whole purpose of doing so kinda failed when:
She also stayed. OBVIOUSLY waiting for me. OBVIOUSLY!!
So I just decided to wait longer, but of course, the people that stayed behind did so because they were gonna get busy, and one after another they left, so when the guy I was sitting with left, I gave up.. I decided to leave too.
And as any sane person would predict, she had been waiting for me to leave, all along..
Even though she hadn't spoken with me, she walked with me towards the bus stop, and on this little walk she started talking to me again and stuff..
One of the things she brought up was how mad she got when I forgot to bus home with her yesterday, and she was acting all pissed.. -.-
I remember writing in the FIRST of these posts that 99% of the time, I have to change bus.
The 1% where I don't need to do so, is in the case where the "33"-bus arrives instead of the normal "31"-bus.
And today, the 33-bus came <-- taking this bus means that SHE is the one that has to get of mid-way to change bus, while I can just sit back and relax, all the way home <-- it's not like it matters to her, like I've said before, she gets of the bus anyways to wait for the next bus with me..
So anyways, today the
cool bus arrived.
And there we sat.
Then on the stop before she has to get off, someone came aboard the bus.
This was my uncle!
So I said hi, and then Girl X asked who this person was.
I told her he was my uncle.
And then my uncle asked "Is this your girlfriend?"
And Girl X replied "Yes!" ........
Can you imagine what went through my head at that moment? She's putting me through torture, holy shit....
She did start saying something, but I interupted her and said "what? no, what are you talking about?".
And she started looking at me super-intensely! :O
I turned to my uncle and said "it's not true, she's not my girlfriend!"
She did not head-butt me, but she did start crying.
This happened right about when the bus stopped and the doors opened.
So she got up, still crying, and ran out of the bus, crying.. -.-
This is so ridiculous!
Guys, just what am I gonna do about her?
Jompa, the more you post and complain about her and shit, the more I know that you two are going to fall madly in love with one another.
There's an entire musical on YouTube by one of my favorite amateur production companies that highlights the idea that your true love is often the person you initially dislike. Trust me, man. Its coming for you. Why else would you be so aware of her absence? Because you think about her ALL THE TIME. Just imagine what will happen to you if she just disappears altogether. Sure, it'd be great! She wouldn't annoy you anymore, no more rumors, etc. But deep down inside you'll be hurting because this girl, who weasled her way into holding such a high importance in your life (positive or negative, it doesn't matter) just disappeared off the face of the earth and she took that part of you with her. If I were to assume correctly, I would think you'd have a hard time trying to find something to fill that now-emptyspot.
Face it, man. She is your density.
/BacktotheFutureReference
I assure you, you are wrong!
Denying it is only making it worse, man. ::)
Holy shit an actual guy who doesn't want a girlfriend. :O
gay
QuoteAnd then my uncle asked "Is this your girlfriend?"
And Girl X replied "Yes!" ........
OMG what a freak, next time you get out of school just run away from her
Good show, good show:
Me and My Dick, by Starkid Productions. It'll teach you some life lessons, kids. Also, you'll never look at your penis the same way ever again. (this is only Act 1, Part 1. you have to watch the whole thing for the full effect.)
EDIT: Ninja'd.
Quote from: The Boy Who Cried Wolf on March 08, 2013, 09:08:55 AMOMG what a freak, next time you get out of school just run away from her
But she camps outside school for me!!??! D:
@Kman: NOOOO, I hate her!!
That's getting really creepy. O_o Jompa, just be firm. Headbutt her if you need to.
Or just express the true feelings you have for her Jompa, stop hiding them XD
Quote from: AamirI talk too much
<3
Jompa is gonna marry this girl so friggin hard.
Quote from: someoneSFK talks too much
Oh stop it XD Maybe she'll be tolerable in a few years. Just keep reminding her not to get too close to you in the meantime.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 08, 2013, 11:29:09 AMJompa is gonna marry this girl so friggin hard.
He just doesn't wanna admit it <3
and now i'll shut up~
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 08, 2013, 11:29:09 AMJompa is gonna marry this girl so friggin hard.
Quote from: Maestro Aamir on March 08, 2013, 12:29:51 PMHe just doesn't wanna admit it <3
This^^^ <3
I love how we have the same mindset ::)
-.-
Quote from: Jompa on March 08, 2013, 09:47:24 AMBut she camps outside school for me!!??! D:
Friggin' spawn campers. >:(
Try channeling your inner James Bond/Sly Cooper/Solid Snake and be stealthier when she's near.
i'll go with the Sly Cooper one
..actually, I do try to do that every day, but she's super-fast! It's totally nuts, I mean - the second the teacher says we're finished, she stands there, ready to walk to the bus with me..
It is almost impossible to avoid her! The only way to do so is if my last class is somewhere else than her last class, but even then she is still super-fast..
Quote from: Jompa on March 08, 2013, 08:01:46 AMSpoiler
Then on the stop before she has to get off, someone came aboard the bus.
This was my uncle!
So I said hi, and then Girl X asked who this person was.
I told her he was my uncle.
And then my uncle asked "Is this your girlfriend?"
And Girl X replied "Yes!" ........
Can you imagine what went through my head at that moment? She's putting me through torture, holy shit....
She did start saying something, but I interupted her and said "what? no, what are you talking about?".
And she started looking at me super-intensely! :O
I turned to my uncle and said "it's not true, she's not my girlfriend!"
She did not head-butt me, but she did start crying.
This happened right about when the bus stopped and the doors opened.
So she got up, still crying, and ran out of the bus, crying.. -.-
This is so ridiculous!
Guys, just what am I gonna do about her?
Eeh, I feel bad for you Jompa: she doesn't understand that she can't force you to love her. She's a very desperate person.
Quote from: Kman96 on March 08, 2013, 08:23:11 AMJompa, the more you post and complain about her and shit, the more I know that you two are going to fall madly in love with one another.
Face it, man. She is your density.
/BacktotheFutureReference
Not always true, no, especially in a case like this. This is heavy!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on March 08, 2013, 09:07:01 AMHoly shit an actual guy who doesn't want a girlfriend. :O
Jompa isn't the only one: I can't stand people who have a boyfriend/girlfriend "just to have one."
BDS, Kman and FSM were both making jokes with those comments. No need to disagree.
Quote from: spitllama on March 08, 2013, 03:59:09 PMBDS, Kman and FSM were both making jokes with those comments. No need to disagree.
Actually, that is kinda how I feel. Who knows what the future holds!
It's a battle with its own destiny..~
You know, Jompa, you seem to exert quite a bit of emotional energy over this girl. You clearly plan you entire day around her, and don't make any reall attempts to avoid her. (You waited a little at school? That's hardly avoiding someone.) You've expressed your felings before (to hilarious results) yet you really don't make the effort to do something about it.
Sure, she's clingy, but how much harm has she really caused you? She clearly hasn't done and emotional of mental damage, otherwise you'd make greater efforts to deal with the problem.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 08, 2013, 07:06:02 PMYou know, Jompa, you seem to exert quite a bit of emotional energy over this girl. You clearly plan you entire day around her, and don't make any reall attempts to avoid her. (You waited a little at school? That's hardly avoiding someone.) You've expressed your felings before (to hilarious results) yet you really don't make the effort to do something about it.
Sure, she's clingy, but how much harm has she really caused you? She clearly hasn't done and emotional of mental damage, otherwise you'd make greater efforts to deal with the problem.
This is what I was trying to say. Maestro just made it sound smarter.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on March 08, 2013, 09:07:01 AMHoly shit an actual guy who doesn't want a girlfriend. :O
gay
-.- REALLY? It's comments like these that bother the hell out of me. I personally don't really want a girlfriend, but that's mostly because I hate 90% of teenage girls, no matter how attractive they might be. Same goes for guys. Teenagers in general are a terrible species.
It's hard to find a good girlfriend, would blame you for not wanting one.
Our generation is so bad, like you said 90% of them are not dateable/wantedbyanyone
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 08, 2013, 07:54:53 PM-.- REALLY? It's comments like these that bother the hell out of me. I personally don't really want a girlfriend, but that's mostly because I hate 90% of teenage girls, no matter how attractive they might be. Same goes for guys. Teenagers in general are a terrible species.
Yep; I can agree with that (a bit ironic for me, though? :P).
Quote from: Kman96 on March 08, 2013, 07:49:12 PMMaestro just made it sound smarter.
like he always does, making crap sound like quantum physics.
But I have to agree, Jompa, why make such a big deal if she hasn't affected you emotionally? (or the point is probably being missed..)
Oh, she's obviously affected him emotionally, but I don't think it's been nearly as negative as he's wanting it to be.
He does a lot of complaining, but seems very ready to go on endlessly about her. Indifference is one thing, but there's something here that's he doesn't want to dismiss.
True fact: the opposite of love is not hate; it's indifference.
Exactly. Both love and hate are emotions, indifference means the thought or idea does not rate in one's mind or heart. Indifference is a terrible disease to inflict on someone.
That's why "I love you, but I'm not IN love with you" is one of the most devastating things ever
I'll give you guys a summary:
I don' like nor love her.
In fact, I hate her.
So affected me emotionally, she has, but in the most negative way three is. Hate.
She is the one who loves, and therefore stalks me.
I have to avoid her everyday, because as we all know; she's totally nuts.
I did wait at school to avoid her, as I said, she had already been ready to go when class was finished, and waiting was the only way to avoiding her.
Maestro, Kman and the other Maestro are wrong, so the three of you can just go hide your heads in the sand. <3
C'mon, after all you've read, who could possibly fall in love with this girl?
She fucking head-butted me!
You seem to be busy convincing yourself you hate her. If you really hated her, you'd spend as many chances as you'd get putting her down one way or another. You clearly don't want to do that. My argument to you is that, while you don't love, or particularly like her, but she's obviously not going away, and you aren't pushing her away either.
My argument is this: Re-evaluate your relationship to her, with her, regarding her.
Maestro, I think you are a bit high on the love doctor drug right now.
Everything you come with is all this "oh, but you real fealings blah blah blah..." and that's just a load of bullshit!
I don't need to convince myself that I hate her, because I already know that for sure.
Have another look at the summary - it is totally correct.
Suit yourself, it just takes far more effort to hate someone when you can just as quickly write them off and leave them behind.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 09, 2013, 12:48:40 AMYou seem to be busy convincing yourself you hate her. If you really hated her, you'd spend as many chances as you'd get putting her down one way or another. You clearly don't want to do that. My argument to you is that, while you don't love, or particularly like her, but she's obviously not going away, and you aren't pushing her away either.
My argument is this: Re-evaluate your relationship to her, with her, regarding her.
Hey now. He obviously doesn't like her much. Just because you get worked up about something doesn't mean you're in love with him/her.
What Maestro1 is trying to say is that Jompa shouldnt put too much emphasis on someone he hates. But itll be up to him to figure da restz~
sure
I think (or rather, hope) I speak for everyone when I say that the level of emphasis on this strange girl is a bit extreme. Jompa, I don't think anyone is disregarding the seriousness of your situation, nor are they telling you what you're feeling for you. Everyone is just simply saying that the amount of influence this girl has on your life is what's negative, not the fact that you like her or hate her. The best course of action you could take is make an attempt to ignore her, or just put her down. If what you've been saying is true (all up to the fact that she's been stalking you) then feelings shouldn't be spared. No one is doubting you, Jompa, but the way you've been reacting to your situation is somewhat unexpected.
But she's absolutely insane!!
I believe I have full rights to emphasize as much as I want. Doesn't need to mean anything from my part, but in this case I do it because I hate her, because she's fucking nuts.
In other news...
She has been texting me at least four times every day during easter break, and I haven't replied to any of them..
..but she just keeps texting me..
She's basically just having a conversation with herself.
^Now, to my point:
Can anyone help me come up with an excuse why I "haven't seen" any of these messages? ???
I don't know how people are rallying around the idea that Jompa has secret feelings for this person, to be honest. Freud has been dead for about a century now, we're beyond his frivolous ideas. Generally, if someone abhors another with this type of passion, he/she isn't trying to repress an emotion. If Jompa really loved this girl, why would he be restraining his feelings for her? It's not logical and I think it's rather conspicuous that he's extremely distasteful of her.
I think you should just tell her that she's negatively affecting your life and causing you distress. And then proceed to telling her you would like her to stop being a nuisance (and don't try to sugarcoat things either. Don't be cruel, but just tell her how you feel without seeming harsh). And if she doesn't concede to your actions, you may have to take some sort of actions (whether it be informing the school principle, speaking to her parents, etc). Don't make up excuses for the text messages, be honest and stern. If she doesn't have a clue when you tell her things directly, she won't be any more dissuaded if you make excuses, I would imagine.
Jompa, just be a man and tell her that you don't want any kind of relationship with her, instead of making excuses. I think you just like the fact that somebody's fancying you. Otherwise you would have made it clear to her that you're not into her.
plus i'm sick of you whining about her
You guys are really smart, and I do realize that coming up with an excuse for the texts is a bad idea, but guys, I told her already!
It's not that she doesn't take a hint, it's more like she refuses to give up. And it's no good trying to be psychological about this girl, because she's crazy.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on March 30, 2013, 08:10:04 AMI think you just like the fact that somebody's fancying you. Otherwise you would have made it clear to her that you're not into her.
in other words, this^ isn't really right
Then I suggest taking more initiative and contacting some form of authority. If you can't do anything about it, you'll have to be sterner about it.
Quote from: Mashi on March 30, 2013, 08:32:23 AMThen I suggest taking more initiative and contacting some form of authority. If you can't do anything about it, you'll have to be sterner about it.
Listen to Mashi, you'll live longer. Jompa, everything he's said is right. Be honest, be firm. Rinse and repeat if needed.
Yah, I'm pretty sure that counts as harassing.
ninja'd
In homestuck, hate is a type of romance. just saying
Look, she's no problem right now, as I sit here with my computer ignoring her texts, so it's not like I'm gonna do anything
now,
but there will soon be a day where all this craziness resumes, and when that day comes; I'll do whatever necessary to make her stay away from me.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on March 30, 2013, 08:41:44 AMIn homestuck, hate is a type of romance. just saying
I still hate her
This isn't homestuck, though. Jompa's situation is real and we should handle it like it's an actual problem.
Have you tried calling your service provider and blocking her number? (if that's possible...)
Quote from: Nebbles on March 30, 2013, 08:44:54 AMHave you tried calling your service provider and blocking her number? (if that's possible...)
I don't think I'm quite there yet(?) - I mean, I don't feel like these text she's been sending me this week is the main problem. They are a cheap price to pay for being free from her for a week.
But in speculation: if I did that, and purposely made her find out, that could might be a way to make her go away.
well, idk, I'll deal with this when she becomes a problem again. And I'll just ignore the texts, until tuesday.
How did she get your number? xD
A bit unrelated, but back when one of my sisters were in middle school, this punk kid who liked her got our number (it was a landline) and kept calling for some weeks. We got the dean involved and he didn't call anymore. Text messages aren't really the same thing though so I think you'd just have to tell her no. Or fake a relationship with another girl or guy who's willing to help you out.
Quote from: Jompa on February 14, 2013, 08:48:18 AMAnd all of this just because I helped her find her phone, the first day of school. After that she's obviously been in love with me.. D: Guh...
^Well, right after this, she asked for my number, so I gave it to her, unknowing of what where to come..
Quote from: Ruto on March 30, 2013, 09:30:47 AMHow did she get your number? xD
lol
Probs one of her friends who knows Jompa, gave it to her.
Quote from: Jompa on March 30, 2013, 09:35:53 AM^Well, right after this, she asked for my number, so I gave it to her, unknowing of what where to come..
actually^
Quote from: Jompa on March 30, 2013, 07:45:37 AMShe has been texting me at least four times every day during easter break, and I haven't replied to any of them..
..but she just keeps texting me..
She's basically just having a conversation with herself.
^Now, to my point:
Can anyone help me come up with an excuse why I "haven't seen" any of these messages? ???
Be honest. Get some people to help you with the situation; if you try to work alone, you'll get nowhere. You need to DRILL IT into her head (not literally!!).
Or just tell her that you couldn't find the phone for a few days. :P
I don't really know how you can be any more direct actually. As much as I think tricking her is a bad idea, what if you just introduce her to someone else? Or at least find her a new friend. It seems weird to me that girls would want to be with a guy all the time.
In other news I'm in an odd situation where people really need to quit playing matchmaker. I'm really not interested in that kind of thing, since someone wants my attention every second and it's distracting me from work.
Quote from: Jompa on March 30, 2013, 07:45:37 AMBut she's absolutely insane!!
I believe I have full rights to emphasize as much as I want.
I wasn't saying you couldn't (sorry if I came off that way), but I do agree with Mashi. Due to the seriousness of the situation, it's time to take a higher level of action. I really don't know if anything else is better for you right now.
Yeah.
Well it's tuesday morning right now, so I'll probably meet her today.. That'll be fun.
I dont understand whats so hard about saying "i dont like you in that way, I dont like you at all, I dont want to be friends with you, please leave me alone or I will literally get a restraining order"
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on April 01, 2013, 11:14:23 PMI dont understand whats so hard about saying "i dont like you in that way, I dont like you at all, I dont want to be friends with you, please leave me alone or I will literally get a restraining order"
Although it may seem as if I'm repeating the same thing over and over (TWG'ers will know :P): You can't convince people who won't listen.
ask Ruto
He's in a pretty bad situation, plus this girl is the type to go tell everyone how much of a jerk he is if he does that.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on April 01, 2013, 11:14:23 PMI dont understand whats so hard about saying "i dont like you in that way, I dont like you at all, I dont want to be friends with you, please leave me alone or I will literally get a restraining order"
If you cut out the part about the restraining order, I literally said that to her, on Valentine's Day when this whole thing started.
And I did actually tell her once more, but that I don't think I've told you guys about (I probably didn't feel like it was worth mentioning here, because it apparently didn't matter to her).So if anyone cares, since I said I'd probably meet her today as easter break is over now:
She really wasn't a problem today, because I didn't really have any subjects with her, but she did insist on walking to the bus stop together.
That is when I was saved! Because a boy and a girl in my class that I am good friends with also came to the bus stop (they usually don't take the bus, but when they do, they take the same bus as me), and they of course stopped to chat with us, so I was sorta saved from being alone with Girl X :)
So they took the bus with us :) But even though she now would have company on her ride home after I have to get off, she
still chose to get off and wait with me for my bus -.-
Didn't have to wait long though :)
See, then I see you keep agreeing to meet with her so it starts seeming like you are still accepting her presence but ehhhh
Guess I haven't ever had to deal with a crazy stalker ::)
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on April 02, 2013, 08:55:14 AMSee, then I see you keep agreeing to meet with her so it starts seeming like you are still accepting her presence but ehhhh
When she insists we go home together, I don't have to agree, it happens regardless - 'cause that's when her stalking activates for full, and she starts camping around places I have to go past, like the main entrance and stuff..
I remember once, when I was going to take the elevator from the fourth floor and down, and she was already on her way down the stairs - she saw me in the elevator right after it closed (which you can see through because the side facing the stairs is made of glass), and she started running. She ran down the whole building to catch up with me.
Guys
What the hell am I doing wrong
I can't help you if you're gonna go all "15 year-old girl facebook status" when going about asking questions.
BE SPECIFIC.
Don't worry about it I guess?
My problems are much worse -.-
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 13, 2013, 05:26:23 PMI can't help you if you're gonna go all "15 year-old girl facebook status" when going about asking questions.
BE SPECIFIC.
THIS OMG
Vaguebooking is one of my big pet peeves
Those "talks" you have with the girlfriend.
Bleh
I like Kelsey, it's official.
me too man we should go on dates together
Quote from: shadowkirby on May 03, 2013, 10:05:44 PMI like Kelsey, it's official.
damn you.
I wash my hands of this nonsense.
but kman96 and i are already dating
you told me that you aren't dating other men!!!
kman96 isnt a men hes a man96
our whole relationship has based on a cake!!!
that was a lie!!!
So my girlfriend and I are taking a break. Lately we've been arguing so much and it's like we've been so far into the relationship, she seems to not try as hard anymore. But that's not how it works. I couldn't stand it anymore, how much effort I put into the relationship and nothing in return. And on top of that, the fact she'd dismiss any problem we had in the relationship, and prioritize other people and stupid video games in place of me. It's not self centered, I'm her boyfriend. I don't deserve it.
She never saw it coming, me telling her I want a break. She felt so secure in the relationship that she didn't have to try, or even worry of me leaving. Now I just don't know what to do.
Leave: And don't have to worry about being hurt and disregarded again. I don't think she deserves another chance.
Stay: She proves me wrong and changes. I trust her enough to change. But, I have a really hard time doing that right now.
I need some advice. I've given her a chance before and I'm not explaining the issue with that. I feel like she doesn't deserve another.
It's just, I've poured so much of myself into this relationship to just leave. But, I have good reason to.
I just haven't been happy this past month or so, and I want things to get better. Whether I have to leave or stay and cross my fingers....
I'm exhausted.
So guess who's back in the game? That would be me.
First relationship I've been in since, like, junior year. Kinda nice knowing there's someone who truly appreciates my sexiness.
OH! and as for your troubles MM, if you're relationship isn't making you happy, there really isn't point to it is there? I mean, if it's a constant source of stress or unhappiness, ending it or at least taking a break is the obvious choice. Maybe it'll make her appreciate you a bit more.
The thing is she now realizes. I haven't talked to her in a few days but apparently her anxiety of me leaving her is so bad she'll be up literally all night and stuff.
But the thing is, I don't feel sorry. And I'm afraid to come back because what if she doesn't change and does the same to me again and hurts me, then I'd feel stupid for coming back and wasting my time. I'm not sure what to do....
Hmm, I personally don't think you should stay with her if you don't feel comfortable anymore. From my experience, people change, and it lasts for a couple of weeks, max a couple of months... and then it's as if they didn't change at all. At the same time, I don't think someone should change for the sake of a relationship, but that's beside the point. Plus if you've already given her a chance before, and you really don't feel like she deserves another one... and yeah, she was obviously gonna realize now that you said you want to take a break. I guess talking to her could be a good idea too.
If she's hurting you, it's not worth it. Don't let anyone guilt trip you into staying in a relationship.
Thanks guys.
It's just, I'm what you call "too nice." No matter who it is, I ALWAYS care for others before myself. And obviously that can get me in trouble. Its something I can't help, I'm not the type of guy that thinks only of himself. It's very complicated between us. I'm incredibly confused and terrified.
Never be afraid to walk away from toxic people in your life. It may hurt at first, but you'll be happier.
I know someone who was very unhappy in his relationship; basically he didn't love his girlfriend anymore, but he didn't want to hurt her, so he didn't want to break up with her. It lasted for months. They were both very unhappy, and when his girlfriend had enough she dumped him. This is pretty much the worst thing one could do. You end up hurting yourself and your partner by not trying to hurt them, and it just makes the whole thing worse.
Wait a bit first, this might be a small change in personality for your girlfriend and might only be for a short period of time. If she hasn't changed after a few weeks, then break up.
Don't listen to the thirteen year old. I've been hearing about this for a few months and it doesn't really sound like a healthy relationship :/ it sounds like she's constantly prioritizing others before you and frequently ignores you, sometimes overreacting to small things too. It's a decision you ultimately have to make yourself.
Why are people who have no experience over relationships trying to give advice to others who have?
-__________________________-
Quote from: MassiveMayhem on May 07, 2013, 09:01:55 PMI don't think she deserves another chance.
There you have it^
And congratulations SFK!
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on May 08, 2013, 05:14:39 AMWhy are people who have no experience over relationships trying to give advice to others who have?
-__________________________-
Hey now, I don't have any experience but I have talked with him extensively about this.
Well I meant these youngsters we have here. :P
I haven't had any experience either but I can still offer advice...
There is nothing good that comes from a toxic relationship. It's better to end it now while you are taking a break than to get back together for a few weeks to end it anyway.
The thing is FSM I find that the ones who have never been in any kind of relationship give the best advice. Mostly because they're the observers and understand a lot more.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2013, 04:05:19 AMDon't listen to the thirteen year old. I've been hearing about this for a few months and it doesn't really sound like a healthy relationship :/ it sounds like she's constantly prioritizing others before you and frequently ignores you, sometimes overreacting to small things too. It's a decision you ultimately have to make yourself.
I guess relationships are something I shouldn't try to give advice with?
Great advice, people^^
So my former classmates have either started getting married or having children without getting married (there's one that's married with kids too). Anyway I don't know what to think about that, other than I feel sorry for myself for having to hear about it -.- But now that I did hear about all their mishaps and stuff I think I want something completely different! I came to this conclusion recently xD I'm slowwww.
Heh I mean I didn't exactly think before that I would want to not wait to get married or have kids but I guess being in a more serious situation makes you actually think about it more seriously o:
ROFLMAO
i wasnt making a joke
I know XD
I'm tired, confused, and I really just need to say this. Okay, so I'm finishing ninth grade, and today we had the Freshman Dance (my middle school goes 7-9, so it's the last dance at Tamanend and it's a big deal, almost like prom). My brother had a date and I didn't, but my parents didn't give me the option of staying home. So I went, and the first thing I saw was the girl I like, who looked stunning in a light blue dress. I tried to ask her to the dance last week, but that's a whole other tangent, so I wont get into that. I decided I might as well try again, so outside while we were waiting to get into the school I tried to ask her out again. As it would happen, the most annoying kid in school kind of pulled me away, talking about sports or something like that. Throughout the entire night, I didn't see her at all. That is, until the last dance, which was a slow dance. As everyone got into pairs, I could see everyone on the dance floor. I saw her, alone, and made my way towards her. But just as I got halfway there, this other girl stepped in front of me and asked me to dance. Under normal circumstances, I would be thrilled, but I only like this girl as a friend, and I couldn't say no and hurt her feelings. So I didn't get to dance with the girl I liked, but one of my friends. Unfortunately, I'm fairly certain that my friend actually likes me, and I was contemplating whether or not to pull her in close as I danced. I ended up just kind of awkwardly dancing with about 10 inches between us, and I think I might have hurt her feelings. After I got out of there, the dance ended and some people were sticking around talking. I caught this girl that I liked alone, and started talking to her. I was trying to firgure out how to tell her I liked her, so I mentioned that I wanted to slow dance with her. She said, "Really?", but by her tone I couldn't tell if she was happy or angry. As I was about to reply, this guy interrupted the conversation by asking her out. He literally just stepped in front of me and asked her (to which she replied with a "yes"). I didn't even know what to say, and when she turned to me to continue the conversation, I kind of just shrugged her off (which I fell bad about). I got really pissed when the people around me started complaining about minor things, like breaking a nail or losing some lipstick. I may be overreacting, but I just don't know what to make of this.
That is why I am glad I do not have emotions to hinder me.
Spoiler
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Finvestorplace.com%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F06%2Fgrumpycat.jpg&hash=5e88a262d10cf67789e2f56cf30649a5be92c4b8)
But, seriously:
You should've told her directly before that other guy interrupted. Which brings me to the point that that guy was rather rude, at
least for the sole reason of interrupting your conversation so... rudely! :P
Lol wat r gurls?
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on June 14, 2013, 09:56:50 PMBut, seriously:
You should've told her directly before that other guy interrupted.
Yeah, you have a point there. I guess I'm not used to talking to girls that I like.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on June 14, 2013, 09:56:50 PMThat is why I am glad I do not have emotions to hinder me.
(grumpy cat)
Oh, it's another
zinger from the hilarious BlackDragonSlayer
-__- stop being mean Slow
Yeah, Bonus, that's an awkward situation. It's probably best never to ask someone out in the middle of a crowd .__.
Girl X is transferring to England~ That is good news!
XD I was about to ask
Quote from: SlowPokemon on June 15, 2013, 06:48:06 AMOh, it's another zinger from the hilarious BlackDragonSlayer
I laughed harder than I should have.
Quote from: TheZeldaPianist275 on June 15, 2013, 09:13:09 AMYeah, Bonus, that's an awkward situation. It's probably best never to ask someone out in the middle of a crowd .__.
Yeah, that's why I was trying to get her alone.
Quote from: Jompa on June 15, 2013, 09:27:03 AMGirl X is transferring to England~ That is good news!
After all that's happened, that's good news indeed!
Quote from: SlowPokemon on June 15, 2013, 06:48:06 AMOh, it's another zinger from the hilarious BlackDragonSlayer
Aaah, entertaining.
Quote from: Jompa on June 15, 2013, 09:27:03 AMGirl X is transferring to England~ That is good news!
That is most certainly good news; congratulations (would that be proper to say in a situation such as this?)! :D
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on June 15, 2013, 05:09:12 PMcongratulations (would that be proper to say in a situation such as this?)! :D
Haha I guess :P Well it is kinda mean, but I believe congratulations is appropriate. ;D
Met a beautiful girl at Bonnaroo when Bernhoft was playing on Friday. Hung out with her the whole day and night, and most of Saturday. We split up, planning to meet up a bit later. Couldn't find her the rest of the festival. Don't have her phone number. Only know her first name and I can't find her on Facebook. BUT I KNOW SHE LIVES IN FLORIDA. AND WITHIN REASONABLE DISTANCE TOO.
FUCK FUCK FUCK FCUK FACKK FKDJDFKNDKJVFNLDKVNDK DJV<NDJKVNKJDNLFI
That sucks, you had lots of chances to get more information about her though.
Quote from: Ricky on June 18, 2013, 10:48:20 PMThat sucks, you had lots of chances to get more information about her though.
Bro, you don't get it. At Bonnaroo, anyone you talk to, you feel like you've already known them for years and are just striking up a conversation with a buddy. Everyone is just that friendly. The fact that I know her first name is a lot, considering I had talked to people there for hours during down time and not even got that much. Because you never feel the need to introduce yourself.
Quote from: FSM-Reapr on June 18, 2013, 11:50:50 PMhigh five
Aw. Yeah.
I planned this super romantic boat trip for tomorrow evening. It's gonna be awsm.
Looking forward to it :)
srry the boat is for mashi and me
i booked a room for us in this motel for this weekend tho
Aww, then Jub3r7 and I have nowhere to go.
So I guess we'll have to comfort each other.
Nah, don't worry about me, SlowPokemon. Go take care of FSM while Mashi and I run around New York City and save the world.
jub3r7
more like
DEAD3r7
dead3r7?
More like bigsig hidden in a spoiler tag
as long as he doesn't find out about my affair with massive mayhem then i should be fine
...........Oooooh boy
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcheck.animeblogger.net%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2007%2F02%2Fccs-ep02-screen000.jpg&hash=b6bb91d131b19e9535418ee79011f40a8334a29b)
Shh I'm not actually here
Quote from: Jub3r7 on June 19, 2013, 10:21:11 PMas long as he doesn't find out about my affair with massive mayhem then i should be fine
Oh.
So I'm thinking about using online dating, but I don't know if I'm ready yet or not... I've never had a relationship with anyone so I'm a little nervous...
Aahhh I just don't knowwww...
Dude if we date would that count as online dating??? If so then I say yes
By online dating I mean people who I can actually meet up with who are also online.
I still love u though (islut)
I'd say go for it, (probably) doesn't hurt to branch out and try something new. Helps with all sorts of things like being more confident with yourself and overall well-being :D Just be wary that those sometimes have a higher concentration of undesirable individuals..
Well all of my experience of online dating is focused on my computer's calendar
Get it
Calendars have dates
HAHAHAHAHA
...I know where the door is, thank you...
Ninja'd
dude i say we gogogo to a gay bar and ill be ur wingman
i don't think there are gay bars in findlay though lol
*not sure did you mistype Finland or is that your home town* lol
I'm assuming the second option.
Edit: *highly assuming
Findlay is NOT my hometown, it's just where I live as of now.
Zionsville will always be my hometown <3
[6/21/2013 10:48:08 PM] Mashi: lol
[6/21/2013 11:35:15 PM] Mashi: omg youre going to be online dating this is going to be the cutest thing ever, omg
[12:28:21 AM] Dude: what
[12:28:38 AM] Dude: why is that cute?
[12:28:40 AM] Dude: lol
[1:08:58 AM] Mashi: because
[1:09:01 AM] Mashi: it is so cute
[1:09:07 AM] Dude: but whyyy
[1:09:25 AM] Dude: I'll try and find a hot one
[1:09:25 AM] Mashi: ur a cyootie 3.141592653...
[1:09:28 AM] Mashi: ;)
[1:09:32 AM] Dude: lol
[1:09:34 AM] Mashi: find one that likes touhou
[1:09:37 AM] Dude: OMG
[1:09:38 AM] Dude: YES
[1:09:51 AM] Dude: I doubt i can find one in findlay though
[1:09:53 AM] Dude: meh
[1:09:58 AM] Dude: I'll make him like touhou lol
[1:38:49 AM] Mashi: Yaaaaaaaay.
now i don't wanna do it. ._.
Quote from: Dude on June 21, 2013, 10:47:41 PMnow i don't wanna do it. ._.
"Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."
—M. Kathleen Casey
[Insert more inspiring quotes here.]
i was kidding but thx.
now what site should i sign up on?
CHRISTIAN FUCKING MINGLE.COM
BEST DATING SITE OF ALL TIME.
nothx
Quote from: Dude on June 22, 2013, 01:29:58 PMnothx
OMFG DUDE WHAT IF YOU TROLLED EVERYONE THERE IT WOULD BE THE BEST THING EVER
But... that's mean.
Hey guys, what do you when you really miss a girl you can't see for two months?
There is this dear friend of mine that was in my junior high school band.
We had some romance going on during band camp this year(though we aren't dating), and I have totally fallen for her.
But after band camp she left for Sweden and is staying there for two more months - and I can't talk to her because she's without internet.
The big problem is, I miss her a lot. I wouldn't imagine that it would suck this much. I can't stop thinking about her for more than ten minutes.
Anyone ever felt the same way? What can I do to stop thinking about her? I thought time would be the answer, but it's been two weeks..
I'd go visit her.
That's what I did.
Quote from: Dude on June 21, 2013, 01:26:49 PMi don't think there are gay bars in frisco though lol
Yes there are. Lots of them.
Quote from: DrP on July 15, 2013, 10:33:08 PMYes there are. Lots of them.
well i'm not in california and i don't want to move :|
Tomorrow. Tomorrow is the day.
SFK, I better receive an invitation to the wedding!!!
Quote from: Dude on July 16, 2013, 03:46:01 PMwell i'm not in california and i don't want to move :|
Hahaha but you should totally go off to explore new places! It's kind of fun in a scary way xD
I'm only saying that because I can't drive.
Hey I am not a bad driver most of the time
I didn't say you were xD Still, not being able to drive is why I haven't been on a road trip yet/rural places.
I'm getting married
MY BEST FRIEND AND MY FIANCÉ ARE GOING BEHIND MY BACK WTF
Quote from: Kman96 on November 03, 2013, 04:00:45 PMMY BEST FRIEND AND MY FIANCÉ BEHIND MY BACK WTF
wait you and shadow are getting married?
Oh I thought you meant that shadowkirby was your best friend and your fiance and that he was telling people behind your back.
dying
The girl problems continue.
I don't even know what I'm doing or what to do anymore.
Details!
Huh I never thought people thought dating was such a big deal.
Anyway does she think you're creepy? If so, try working on your appearance. Just the simple stuff you can do everyday, a six pack isn't really worth the time or effort unless you really want to get fit. Leave her alone unless you're working on a class project, don't try to see her after school unless she asks to...be really good at something that she might end up asking you for help on...
Okay, NSM really, really needs help with the ladies and I feel that I somehow am the member here with the most expertise in this field.
SFK's GUIDE FOR GETTING ALL TEH LADIES:
STEP 1: GET THAT SIX PACK MOTHERFUCKER. I have one and I know from experience that it's fantastic. You never want to purposely show it off the avoid looking douchey, but if you happen to be shirtless and you're a skinny white guy, girls will be all "I AM SURPRISED BY YOUR HAWT BOD" and will want to rub it. Like, literally every time. It's a fucking magnet. Personal experience has taught me this. BUT DON'T STOP THERE. Improve your entire physique, not just to get girls, do it for yourself. The great philosopher Socrates once said a human body that has never reached it full potential was a wasted one. Once you start exercising and eating better, you'll feel more healthy, more confident, and girls WILL notice because, believe it or not, girls love a hot nerd guy just as much as guys love a hot nerd girl. And it's especially to your advantage because hot nerd guys are an even rarer breed of human than their female counterparts.
STEP 2: UPDATE THAT WARDROBE MOTHERFUCKER. Clothes can say a lot about a person. It can show you status in a business,society, or wealth. And more importantly, being well dressed let's people know you care about yourself. I personally love wearing clothes that make me look good. I feel more confident and know that I'm making a good first impression with women, acquaintances, and people in general. For skinny white dudes, I recommend American Apparel for t-shirts that fit well(and are extreme comfortable), maybe some flannel if you can pull it off, and definitely slim cut or skinny pants. Further more, invest in a nice watch(Fossil makes great ones for a modest price, I recommend a leather strap). And when you wear long sleeves, roll those suckers up. For some reason, a majority of girls love it when a guys sleeves are rolled up. Maybe because often when a guy rolls up his sleeves, he's about to do some serious fucking work and girls like that? Dunno. If you want some good places for clothes or just a link to something stylish, hit me up.
STEP 3. HYGIENE....MOTHERFUCKER. Seriously, too many geeks and nerds seem to be out of touch with the fact that their smell, not their "niceness", is often the deciding factor when not attracting girls. SHOWER ONCE A DAY, YOU FILTHY, FILTHY BOYS. Now, I don't actually use shampoo personally, because hair actually is much healthier if you only wash it with water(soap washes away all those healthy oil and shiz from your hair). But some people have oilier hair than others. And ALWAYS use body wash. Especially the armpits and crotch, which account for a lot of your stank. But more importantly if how your hair is cut and styled. Get a cut that informs the ladies that, yes, you do indeed give a damn and you look damn good doing it. Often you can leave you hair nice and messy and as long as the cut itself is stylish and your wearing a well put together outfit, it makes people think your just leaving messy on purpose because you're that cool. Also, brush your teeth in the morning. Nobody likes bad breathe. If you don't have time, Orbitz is your friend.
Seriously, a hair cut, a new outfit, and an exercise regiment will get you miles closer to being the super fly ladies man you always wanted to be.
Skimmed through your guide just now, will read it more thoroughly in the morning.
1) I HAVE THAT SIX PACK MOTHERFUCKER.
2) Hmm... will look into this more later...
3) Since my hair is messy as shit and impossible to fix up in the morning, I just wet it so it's not as... tall (if that made sense). I assume that's not enough?
Oh man, did he just say he's the most experienced when it comes to da ladiez? cuz fsm is in the house and the screams of the fangirls fill the room
It's all about that confidence and charisma, man. I'd seriously say fuck everything else if you have confidence. Most of SFK said are for you to feel more confident around women, it doesn't mean by just doing those things girls will be all over you.
LOOK WHO'S RETURNED, JUST TO UPSURP MY AUTHORITY!
DAMN YOU FSM, DAMN YOU.
1) Haha being fit is nice and it really does make me stare at you for more than a second but it's not really necessary if you're an engineer or something XD *cough*
2) I don't really like American Apparel but that's because their CEO or something is a total creep. Uniqlo is good for the lazy guys that like to wear more than just t-shirts. Everything is so plain but in lots of colors so you can't really go wrong with what they have.
3) Lol I was going to mention that but I didn't want to be offensive xD Girls tend to know if you haven't showered, shaved or washed your face way more easily than you think they do because they have a better sense of smell.
If you're lazy with your hair, cut it really short so you don't have to brush it.
Uhhh the point about shampoo is somewhat valid, but you should still be washing it at least semi-often with more than just water for most people at least, unless you never go outside and spend all your time in some sanitized lab ._.
But yes, many people seem to think that their stench is somehow not noticeable (perhaps they have become accustomed to it themselves??)
They are wrong.
AA has some comfy T shirts but I can't speak for anything else they have. I do enjoy Uniqlo for being decently stylish and inexpensive. And I also kinda like the minimalism to an extent.
Just don't be one of those kids that only ever wears super unflattering t shirts (giant, bad designs) or a trenchcoat. That is automatic people-repellent right there.
Yeah!!!
Keep posting because no one on Facebook is funny. Distract me from my own problems!!!
Everyone on NSM seems to have a Sixpack.... haha I don't believe you :P
Contemplating doing a douchey selfie to defend my abdomen's honor, but positive it will only further damage my honor as a person.
just add a duckface and everything will be ok
And add ten pounds of makeup too. Then you'll be fine.
By the way, I told Jackie not to tell anyone that I asked her out and failed miserably (for the tenth goddamn time). She told Olivia, her best friend... who has a habit of telling everyone all the secrets she learns about me.
Your mistake was assuming a high school girl wouldn't gossip just because you said not to.
My mistake was befriending her in the first place.
Just move on. Seriously, I had my heart stomp into a bloody pulp by a girl a few months back and I'm willing to bet our relationship was far more intimate than yours with this Jackie girl. But you get over her, you move on. Because only you can create your own happiness. Letting anyone else control it will lead to bad things. And then eventually you'll meet a far prettier, nicer girl who actually wants a real relationship with you. And when this Jackie hasn't crossed you mind for a week or two, when you do think about, you'll know she was never worth a cent of your energy.
Quote from: dahans on December 07, 2013, 12:16:57 AMEveryone on NSM seems to have a Sixpack.... haha I don't believe you :P
Hahaha I don't think everyone said they did xD
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on December 07, 2013, 12:39:04 AMContemplating doing a douchey selfie to defend my abdomen's honor, but positive it will only further damage my honor as a person.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on December 07, 2013, 12:52:35 AMjust add a duckface and everything will be ok
If everyone thinks highly of you already they would know that's a joke :D
...
Yeah, wait for someone better. You never know whether the girl you really, really liked might be posting on facebook about a baby daddy in a few years...
There is a saying that says "All people.will make you suffer, you have to people.worth suffering for" but I am ever more quickly finding that there are no people suffering for.In the long run, everyone will let you down in an unforgivable way. So instead of trying to accommodate for other mistakes, take what you need from people and forget about. Whether its money, sex, or other selfish purposes, you are the only person who you can ever trust not to let you down. Fuck who you want and take what you want. No regrets. Because people and love and caring will only make.you suffer. That's literally the only.lesson I've.learned about love. Relationships aren't worth it.
Have you been drinking? xD
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on December 08, 2013, 01:09:39 AMThere is a saying that says "All people.will make you suffer, you have to people.worth suffering for"
silliest lesson ever
I disagree. There's a colossal amount of altruism and kindness in the world to go around. And even if one were to disagree with that notion, we're a long way forward from a few centuries ago, when torture and sacrifice were ubiquitous, humans were made slaves, people were dying of sickness, etc. And I believe that we are definitely approaching the ideal for morality in humanity.
There's a quote from Game of Thrones that I liked (though, I'm paraphrasing) that stated "The more people you love, the more of a Hell your life becomes." Now, although I don't mean to dissuade people from loving as many people as possible, the only reason I bring this up is to make a comment that love and caring can be difficult, and they're arduous tasks if you have many loved ones. Such as the usual example of having to choose between saving only one of two children from drowning; it's lose-lose either way.
But what I find amazing is that we end up caring for one another in the end. Ruto, for example, has always looked out for me. I would probably have no idea what I was doing with my life if she weren't selfless enough to give a helping hand so often! In much the same way, Kefka helps me with questions I have about Maths whenever I have one, Bird and verm verm are always sticking up for me, and many others here! Yet none of them ever expect anything back out of it. I'm not as put-together as Ruto or as intelligent as Kefka or as absolutely amazing as Bird and verm verm, so it's not as if I can reciprocate their kind actions.
I still advocate the idea of forming relationships when one is settled in life (such as when one finds a stable job or is soon to find one). I feel there's too much pressure and misapprehension when trying to form a lifelong relationship of romantic love with someone when the two people are still dependent on their parents! So MasterProX, don't belittle yourself or feel too bad. It's human to err, so certainly try to move on. I wouldn't discourage you from trying your hand again at love if it so happens in the future, so stay confident and keep your head up! If you choose not to pursue a relationship, it's your decision, but don't let this mishap cloud your judgement. I do agree with SuperFireKirby to an extent that you forge your own destiny; you're the only person that can make yourself happy. If you're unhappy outside a romantic relationship, a romantic relationship won't correct that issue. Any gossip on recent events are certain to die down eventually, so don't let anything provoke your or make you feel ashamed.
EDIT: Ohhh, that might explain why his previous two posts have such antithetical tones, Ruto.
I respect that Mashi takes his time to write responses that are like one metre long.
Quote from: Ruto on December 08, 2013, 01:22:48 AMHave you been drinking? xD
Nailed it!
First time I've ever drunk posted. Probably the last. As you might infer, my mind is not in a good place right now. :b
I don't like drunk SuperFireKirby, you're perfect enough the way you are. :(
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on December 08, 2013, 01:09:39 AMThere is a saying that says "All people.will make you suffer, you have to people.worth suffering for" but I am ever more quickly finding that there are no people suffering for.In the long run, everyone will let you down in an unforgivable way. So instead of trying to accommodate for other mistakes, take what you need from people and forget about. Whether its money, sex, or other selfish purposes, you are the only person who you can ever trust not to let you down. Fuck who you want and take what you want. No regrets. Because people and love and caring will only make.you suffer. That's literally the only.lesson I've.learned about love. Relationships aren't worth it.
such brilliance. much grammar. wow.
Hey, I'd like to see you do a better job typing a paragraph while drunk, stoned, and using a phone.
looks like we have a new Harvest in town.
So yeah children, there's your prime example when it comes to ladies.
Wow, I had to bump this off the second page. You go nsm for being good with the ladies ::)
Anyway, my school's Cotillion is coming up, and its custom to bring a date. Since the beginning of the school year, my friend (who goes to a different school) has been sending me pictures and names of guys that she thinks I should take with me. I've never met any of them (and a few she hasn't met either), and the only real characteristic they have is height. I don't want to go alone to the dance, but at the same time I don't want to resign to a complete stranger who is at the same altitude as me? I think I'm supposed to choose soon though since there's all this paperwork you have to fill out if your date isn't from your school
Just pick a person with the same taste in music as you. I have never met anyone who liked the same music as me the I didn't become super good friends with. Seriously, you can learn a person's entire personality by they're musical tastes.
Quote from: Bubbles on January 28, 2014, 01:59:51 PMI don't want to go alone to the dance, but at the same time I don't want to resign to a complete stranger who is at the same altitude as me?
Excuse me if I'm being insensitive, but it seems as if the problem lies mostly in your indecisiveness- I'm not sure what advice I could offer other than decide what you think will be best for you. If you're
really bothered with going with somebody you don't know, then I'd say going alone would be better... and vice-versa if you're more bothered by going alone (which is what SFK is suggesting).
Meeting new people is always a positive thing. Do it whenever possible.
So yes, I highly recommend going with someone you don't know.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on January 28, 2014, 02:18:26 PMJust pick a person with the same taste in music as you. I have never met anyone who liked the same music as me the I didn't become super good friends with. Seriously, you can learn a person's entire personality by they're musical tastes.
But I don't have a taste in music! (Unless anime openings count...)
And I'm more worried about the overall awkwardness if I take a guy I've never met, especially if I meet him the night of the dance. People at my school tend to be...showy when it comes to relationships, and we might stick out
But SFK you make a good point. I suck at meeting new people, so this could be a good opportunity for me. After all, its only Cotillion.
Quote from: Bubbles on January 28, 2014, 01:59:51 PMWow, I had to bump this off the second page. You go nsm for being good with the ladies ::)
Anyway, my school's Cotillion is coming up, and its custom to bring a date. Since the beginning of the school year, my friend (who goes to a different school) has been sending me pictures and names of guys that she thinks I should take with me. I've never met any of them (and a few she hasn't met either), and the only real characteristic they have is height. I don't want to go alone to the dance, but at the same time I don't want to resign to a complete stranger who is at the same altitude as me? I think I'm supposed to choose soon though since there's all this paperwork you have to fill out if your date isn't from your school
But bubbles you ARE a guy :P
So? I can date guys if I want to. No one ever said I was straight.
+1 for bubbles
Yeah, it's a new age with new thoughts and ideas. I date men all the time (but I save all of my lovin' for the ladies).
Quote from: Bubbles on January 28, 2014, 03:09:37 PMBut SFK you make a good point. I suck at meeting new people, so this could be a good opportunity for me. After all, its only Cotillion.
Actually I'm getting kinda nervous and unsure again...Should I make an effort to meet him before the dance? I kinda want to meet him in a crowd of other people (or just not one on one), but the only way I could do that is by making my friend throw a party which I'm not sure she's comfortable with.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 28, 2014, 04:02:30 PMBut bubbles you ARE a guy :P
Quote from: Bubbles on January 28, 2014, 04:43:49 PMSo? I can date guys if I want to. No one ever said I was straight.
+1 for bubbles
Quote from: MaestroUGC on January 28, 2014, 04:49:54 PMYeah, it's a new age with new thoughts and ideas. I date men all the time (but I save all of my lovin' for the ladies).
xDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I have no words...
Nocturne still doesn't get it!
Quote from: Bubbles on January 28, 2014, 07:46:19 PMActually I'm getting kinda nervous and unsure again...Should I make an effort to meet him before the dance? I kinda want to meet him in a crowd of other people (or just not one on one), but the only way I could do that is by making my friend throw a party which I'm not sure she's comfortable with.
I mean, you're meeting them through your friend, right? I can imagine it wouldn't be quite as awkward if you just casually hung out with the guy and your friend once.
Well this one in particular I'm actually meeting through my friends friend... Meanwhile my friend has never met him before
Quote from: Kman96 on January 28, 2014, 07:58:00 PMxDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
I have no words...Nocturne still doesn't get it!
IT JUST OCCURRED TO ME THAT NOCTURNE PROBABLY JOINED AFTER BUBBLES DID THE THING SO HE DOESN'T KNOW
Remember when I changed my gender to female to fuck around with people?
That was great.
:P I don't remember that.
Quote from: Yugi on January 28, 2014, 11:37:45 PMRemember when I changed my gender to female to fuck around with people?
So I'm guessing you were fed up with not getting any as a man?
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.switch180daily.com%2F.a%2F6a014e8b0ebca4970d01a510a77767970c-pi&hash=16b468ae457d8541940cb708996f8a0035f42ba0)
Spoiler
Quote from: Waddle Bro on January 29, 2014, 05:15:05 AM(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.switch180daily.com%2F.a%2F6a014e8b0ebca4970d01a510a77767970c-pi&hash=16b468ae457d8541940cb708996f8a0035f42ba0)
I'm so using this sometime.
BonusPwnage, have you played No More Heroes?
does that have anything to do with relationships
...I'll leave you alone forever now.
Quote from: Dude on February 01, 2014, 01:53:09 PMdoes that have anything to do with relationships
No but he just posted and I recognized his personal text as something from No More Heroes
Just something random I guess it applies but how do you get rid of crushes?
Not sure what you're asking.
Someone who has a crush on you? Ask them, politely, to leave you alone or just avoid them if you're not good at confronting people.
How to get rid of feelings for another person? Quickest way to do that is to find someone new, I've found. They basically replace the last person. Or eat lots of Ben & Jerry's if your female cuz that's what they do, apparently(I do it to, but out of fatness and not depression)
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on February 04, 2014, 03:31:23 PMor just avoid them if you're not good at confronting people.
No, that's just selfish. You'll make their life hell just so you can avoid a confrontation.
I mean there's this person who I think is really awesome but I just want to be friends and not have a crush on her.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on February 04, 2014, 03:31:23 PMHow to get rid of feelings for another person? Quickest way to do that is to find someone new, I've found. They basically replace the last person.
This. Works wonders.
Fall in love with your work then.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 04, 2014, 06:05:55 PMExcept I don't want ANYBODY.
Well, you could always become cold and emotionless like me...If you
really really don't want anybody, I guess you'll just have to "convince" yourself of that: overcome your emotions, so-to-say (I don't know how else to describe this).
Yeah, what SFK said.
Though there is another important thing: are you already friends with the girl, or do you just kinda watch her/say one or two words to her once in a while? Be honest with yourself; if you barely even talk then you should probably get there first
Update on my Cotillion stuff: I've had the guys number for like a week or two now and I haven't even texted him. I'm hoping for either someone else or meeting him first, since getting a random message saying "Hey you don't know me but my friend's friends saw you and thought you were tall and cute and do you want to go to my school's dance with me" is a pretty awkward and obvious last resort
Quote from: Bubbles on February 04, 2014, 06:58:30 PMUpdate on my Cotillion stuff: I've had the guys number for like a week or two now and I haven't even texted him. I'm hoping for either someone else or meeting him first, since getting a random message saying "Hey you don't know me but my friend's friends saw you and thought you were tall and cute and do you want to go to my school's dance with me" is a pretty awkward and obvious last resort
Try to arrange a meeting before then, if possible!... so you can decide if you need to find somebody else... :P
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 04, 2014, 04:33:28 PMI mean there's this person who I think is really awesome but I just want to be friends and not have a crush on her.
Ain't gonna happen unless you start messing with biochemistry :P
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 04, 2014, 04:33:28 PMI mean there's this person who I think is really awesome but I just want to be friends and not have a crush on her.
As a gay person, story of my life. I just try to "friend zone" all of my friends to avoid any awkward emotions. In short, make sure the friendship comes before you have any chance to develop emotions for the person, then the concept of a relationship with said person will seem really weird (you can't completely make yourself not feel anything.) If you already have a crush on her, then the only way you can alleviate that is by being open with her. If she knows your not interested in a relationship than your feeling be easy to accept and deal with.
Quote from: FireArrow on February 05, 2014, 07:41:43 PM(you can't completely make yourself not feel anything.)
Um...
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 04, 2014, 03:19:17 PMJust something random I guess it applies but how do you get rid of crushes?
I really thought you meant you wanted someone killed.
Quote from: Ruto on February 05, 2014, 08:59:37 PMI really thought you meant you wanted someone killed.
literally crush them for the sake of the pun
worth it no regrets
Fuck my luck. First I meet a nice girl, she has a boyfriend. Then I meet a super awesome girl, she has a fiance. Then I meet a girl who looks like Ramona Flowers and is also pretty dang cool, and married. Meanwhile, the only girls interested in me I either don't find appealing or just want to have sex with me, which I also find unappealing. I absolutely hate the idea of casual sex.
I thought I'd have someone significant in my life by this point, or at least at some point HAD someone significant. But it's been nothing missed opportunities and disastrous relationships. And when I finally met someone I truly cared for, someone that gave my life new purpose and made me want to actually be somebody, my heart got kicked in ass.
I am so fucking lonely.[/bipolardepressionrant]
We're at that age now SFK. The age where friends have serious girlfriends and everyone we're interested in is already at that point too. Hanging out with old friends becomes less frequent between classes, said girlfriend, and jobs. Before you know it you need to find someone to date to not feel lonely. Then engagements, then you feel behind the curve again... etc etc.
Not sure what the point of that was, but my school has a "ring by spring" tendency so all of my friends are getting engaged ;_;
I've stopped even caring about a relationship. I've wanted one throughout college (and nothing happened -- and the only one was a "kind of" relationship for 3 months in high school) and I am coming to a realization that I should have one. I mean, expenses are cut in half and you can do fun things together (in my case, I want a traveling buddy).
Especially now, since I am now in the working world and with a bunch of people at different stages in their life, relationships are hard to find... and even more especially since I am busy all the time. But, there is always hope and you guys still have a year or two left of college and anything can happen.
Or there is always that chance that if you move someplace new, things can happen.
And worst part is I fall for so many girls and there is always that friend-zone wall or some other metaphor that stops me one step to the end.
So, just hang in there. Things happen for a reason and surely you'll find someone
Worst part is now if I want to get married, I need to start looking at marriage criteria, not just girlfriend criteria.
Quote from: spitllama on February 07, 2014, 10:30:11 PMNot sure what the point of that was, but my school has a "ring by spring" tendency so all of my friends are getting engaged ;_;
Omg already two of my "good" friends (I say good because they were good friends, but they moved quite a while ago so I haven't seen them) who are a grade above me just got engaged, and it makes me go bonkers because they're only about a year or two older than I am...I thought it would be a while before this happened, but now that only means that...THEY are coming...
First comes love...
Then comes marriage...
Then comes...
a baby in a baby carriage.
People who even think about marriage before they're 25 are cray-cray. There's so much shit that happens during your 20s, you don't know where the hell you'll end up and long-term commitments are just begging to be broken.
That's crazy. I don't know how people can get engaged for years and manage to save up for a wedding at that age (right out of high school/college). I'm just saying that because a wedding reception (not the ceremony) costs about $50,000+.
I personally see it like you're throwing a sack over her head but not quite running off in your horse yet. I knew one guy who got engaged suddenly and then called it off a few months later. It's sad but then what do you expect if you wait so long from engagement to wedding? Also they are probably rushing into it for sex.
@SFK
If they're dissatisfied with their relationship, they's start looking around >__> but don't you have any friends that have friends that are single? A lot of my friends are XD but I don't know whether you'd be interested or not since they're all older than you and live in New York or Boston xD
My parents got married when they were 18. 25th anniversary is this year, so I really try to not make presumptions about early engagements unless I know them really well.
There's no right or wrong age for marriage, because it ultimately just takes effort from the people involved to make it work. Also, what kind of reception are you having that costs $50,000?
My wedding reception is just going to be in a warehouse that's painted solid white and only have a single table that only has unmarked cups of various colored drinks on it. No chairs.
Total cost, couple hundred bucks, maybe more for the painting.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 08, 2014, 10:41:40 AMThere's no right or wrong age for marriage, because it ultimately just takes effort from the people involved to make it work. Also, what kind of reception are you having that costs $50,000?
My wedding reception is just going to be in a warehouse that's painted solid white and only have a single table that only has unmarked cups of various colored drinks on it. No chairs.
Total cost, couple hundred bucks, maybe more for the painting.
Maestro: efficiency expert of the year
Chairs are for the weak.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 08, 2014, 10:41:40 AMMy wedding reception is just going to be in a warehouse that's painted solid white and only have a single table that only has unmarked cups of various colored drinks on it. No chairs.
Total cost, couple hundred bucks, maybe more for the painting.
Lol that sounds fun xD Must be an azn thing to have a super expensive reception then. Basically you'd have 20 tables (small receptions, 50 for large ones), 10-12 people per table, with an 8 course dinner that includes steak, lobster,
sharkfin soup, duck, roast pork, vegetarian stuff, stir fried dishes, fried rice, and an open bar and bottles of champagne for every table, dessert, wedding cake, an MC, photographer, space rental...the bride would also change into several different outfits for the night like one of those super elaborate traditional dresses and some Western ones, wedding photographers...etc. Plus if you're closely related to the bride or groom's family, expect to give her gold jewelry or jade.
I knew a few people that got married that young lol. But they're way out in the country and didn't go to college, so there was less pressure to get a real career and more to start having kids. I honestly don't know what you would do in the country for a job, but it doesn't work in the city. There's the college degree, master's...yeah you'd be busy enough with that. Someone I talked to today said being married while you're in school is a bad idea since you'd feel like you can't do both, even without kids -.- The guy that broke off his engagement went to med school so I don't blame him at all.
Also he was kind of awkward.
Of course there may be some situation where it isn't exactly bad to have a super early marriage, but I would argue that in general it is unwise as unless you have some sort of funky remote-marriage going on it immediately puts constraints on your living and working situation to a much larger extent than you would have had in previous stages of the relationships.
I guess for some hicks that know nothing besides some barn and a field, sex and kids and a family is pretty much the only clear thing in mind, but there really is much more to do in the world that everyone should at least attempt to explore when they're young.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on February 08, 2014, 03:25:51 PMsome barn and a field sex and kids and a family
xD
what's a field sexAlso gold diggers. Gold diggers are cool with it. Except that after a while they get disillusioned and want to go do something else in their lives except gold digging. It's tougher to start when you have a bunch of crying kids, then some teenagers and then a bunch of twenty year olds that are all in college studying subjects you didn't know existed or working and earning a lot more than a drug store cashier. I got part of that from "Malcolm in the Middle."
Edit:
I should also add that I don't think it's a really, really bad idea but it's incompatible with most lifestyles I know in the city. Without a college degree or better, you'd only be able to get a working class income. If you're a woman and you marry right after your college degree and have kids, your husband is stuck paying off the degree for a few years, or your parents are. Most colleges I know cost money, and not the kind of money that you can make working as a cashier or receptionist. If your parents just shelled out $100,000 for a degree you're never going to use, they would definitely be resentful now or later. And you're going to be a decent person and help them out when they need it, right? I think in that case, the parents wouldn't want you to go to college at all.
Quote from: Ruto on February 08, 2014, 03:40:59 PMxD what's a field sex
The strange powers of commas.
i accidentally a punctuation
It's okay lol I thought it was a new thing.
But what kind of job can you do without college that can support a family? Some people say a high school degree is all you need but every kind of school has different standards, so there are at least a few I would think that would graduate students that are barely literate ._. which is one of the major reasons for people needing college anyway.
A lot of trade schools and shiz I suppose. Some don't give college degrees and just train you in whatever career you're planning on going into. College is becoming an slowly archaic system in the US anyway, but there's nothing in the forefront to replace it so people will just keep on going because it's "expected" of them.
But marriage is dumb. I don't know why, but I can easily see myself in a lifelong, committed relationship but I just can't see myself getting married. If I did get married tho, I'd do it in a forest. It'd be cheapo and whey coller than some stuffy old chapel.
That's the more modern thing people are doing... not getting married, but being in a life-long relationship.... and they still have kids and do whatevs. It's mostly what's happening in Scandinavia now.
It makes it easier if there's a divorce-like circumstance and it just makes more sense a lot.
And personally, being 21, I have no idea where my life is going to lead me, whether it be a marriage with kids, a life-long relationship or even just living the high life on my own (though i'd still want someone to travel with)... It all depends on what's gonna happen.
Also, America puts too much emphasis on getting a college degree. It's been like this since the 70s and expected, but before, all you needed was a high school diploma and some trade school for a year or two. It makes much more sense and it's a lot cheaper.
But without marriage there's no real commitment?
Um, yeah there is. You don't need to be married be committed. In fact, I'd argue non-marital lifelong partners are far more committed to each other because they don't have marriage as a crutch to keep them together. My cousin has been with his girlfriend for, I think, 14 years now and all is going well for them.
Though I think we need to think of a better term for people who are in a lifelong relationship but aren't married that's better than life partner, since that's usually just the PC term used to describe gay relationships/marriages, and girlfriend/boyfriend seems far too juvenile.
I feel like marriage discourages cheating more than just a relationship. I don't have any statistics on that, but yah.
Something like 95% of all married people have had at least one extra-marital affair.
So no.
I'm seeing anywhere between 20% and 50%, this (http://www.nbcnews.com/id/17951664/ns/health-sexual_health/t/many-cheat-thrill-more-stay-true-love/) being just one of those sources.
Stats plz.
Marriage gives legal protection, rights and tax breaks. Lol SFK :DDDD
Funny thing was, there was an article about a polygamist on Yahoo's front page today and the most concern was how the tax forms would look like if the single legally married couple of the household could afford all the 17/25 children still living with them.
Ohh this
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infidelity#Incidence
The last ones says:
Relationships: 30-40%
Marriages: 18-20%
Of course there are lots of problems with this. First, what counts as infidelity (flirting with someone at the workplace might not be considered by some, doing stuff with a dirty magazine, chatting online, etc) and deciding if there is any kind of factor to correct for when it comes to marriage..xD How awkward. But whether or not marital status has anything to do with changing a person's behavior/feelings towards others that they consider attractive, I'd have to say that it won't.
Eh, I think I might have been citing a different statistic relating to infidelity. Dunno, considering I did zero research before making that estimate other than the old "I think I read this somewhere".
It's okay because I believed you at first XDDDDDDDD
*A wild etf appears*
Jumping on the marriage topic, I want to be married one day.
If we're going to be together forever, or plan to be, whatever. Why not? Legal benefits!
That being said, I'M FUCKING TERRIFIED. Don't tell Dan, k. I want to get married one day, I know it. BUT I'M SO SCARED. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY. It's terrifying putting a ring on it and knowing that if I have to I can't get out. Even if I believe completely that we'll always be able to talk about things and such. There's just something scary about it. Idk. I'm all over the place, sorry.
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 10, 2014, 12:12:27 AMthat if I have to I can't get out.
last I recall ring =/= blood pact unbreakable by space or time ._.;;
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 10, 2014, 12:12:27 AM*A wild etf appears*
Jumping on the marriage topic, I want to be married one day.
If we're going to be together forever, or plan to be, whatever. Why not? Legal benefits!
That being said, I'M FUCKING TERRIFIED. Don't tell Dan, k. I want to get married one day, I know it. BUT I'M SO SCARED. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY. It's terrifying putting a ring on it and knowing that if I have to I can't get out. Even if I believe completely that we'll always be able to talk about things and such. There's just something scary about it. Idk. I'm all over the place, sorry.
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PrRDrz53Q1E
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 10, 2014, 04:47:03 AMhttp://m.youtube.com/watch?v=PrRDrz53Q1E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33liUdf3xN0
Jayma Mays' voice just crowns it.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on February 10, 2014, 12:36:55 AMlast I recall ring =/= blood pact unbreakable by space or time ._.;;
No, but it makes it a lot harder. DIVORCE TAKES TIME.
^Civil union. Problem solved.
If you have to consider divorce and commitment before marriage then you're probably not marrying the right person.
Or you're a human being who acknowledges the fact that things can change and not everything can be predicted.
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 10, 2014, 02:34:53 PMOr you're a human being
check
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 10, 2014, 02:34:53 PMwho acknowledges the fact that things can change
only if I let them
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 10, 2014, 02:34:53 PMand not everything can be predicted.
yes they can!
Seriously though he said BEFORE marriage. You would think (hope?) that when you're marrying someone you won't want to leave them.
I think he just worded it strangely. It's something that's impossible not to worry about, not because you don't trust the person but because you can't help feeling scared. It shouldn't prevent you from getting married though.
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 10, 2014, 02:34:53 PMOr you're a human being who acknowledges the fact that things can change and not everything can be predicted.
Life can be unpredictable, but that doesn't mean that you say "Ah screw it, whatever happens happens" when making a commitment like marriage. :P
Thousands of people do everyday.
Doesn't mean they should. Marriage isn't really something to be taken lightly. Though it is becoming more and more that way.
Also we just passed the two year anniversary of this thread this week.
I never said it was a good thing. The thing is marriage is a risk you're either willing or unwilling to take. Infidelity is only one thing that can go wrong in a relationship, there are still far more variable that will impact a marriage than that.
If the idea of getting married frightens or worries you now, then don't get married now. Don't even plan for it. Don't even fantasize about marrying someone if it concerns you that much. Just be with them and grow with them until you think you can handle it.
Or unless you guys figure out something else that works for you.
I think you'll be fine if you know when exactly to bail out (meaning you don't stay in an unhappy marriage for a decade) and you didn't throw a huge wedding reception...
Ruto you don't seem to enjoy the idea of marriage in and of itself, do you?
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 10, 2014, 02:38:30 PMQuotethings can change
only if I let them
Scenario: You marry a woman, live happily for a few years, but then, due to circumstances out of your control, she undergoes some traumatic event. Her personality changes, as can be expected, but being a good person, you stay with her so that she can have at least one good thing in her life. Yet, this isn't enough, as she starts lashing out at you at every given opportunity, making it impossible to actually be there for her. You try counseling, you try therapy, she is either unaccepting of or unresponsive to it all. There is no longer any reason for you to be with her, as all of your best efforts have failed to remedy the situation, and so you split apart. Would you say that you
let that happen? You assume too much of your own abilities, and not enough of random chance.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 10, 2014, 02:38:30 PMQuotenot everything can be predicted
yes they can!
I suppose, if we were given an infinite amount of time, resources, and sensory capability, then yes, everything could be predicted down to the atomic level. However, we do not now, nor will we ever, have these things. There are so many things that can change the course of a relationship that we will never have the ability to fully predict, and that is why it's sensible for ETF to be worried about the implications of such a commitment.
Quote from: blueflower999 on February 10, 2014, 02:44:13 PMLife can be unpredictable, but that doesn't mean that you say "Ah screw it, whatever happens happens" when making a commitment like marriage. :P
But...that's my point. I'm saying that by ETF considering divorce and commitment before marriage, this says nothing about the person she'd be marrying. It says that she's being careful and NOT just saying "Ah screw it, whatever happens happens".
I was thinking about this over the weekend (don't ask me what started it).
You know how people complain that there's no punishment for cheating? Why not just make it a standard thing that couples can write into their marriage contracts (or make a separate one) that outlines the repercussions for cheating? Obviously you would define what that entails in advance. It's not exactly the most romantic thing, but if I found out my wife was sleeping with another man and we got in a divorce, I would be more than happy to take all of our possessions, or whatever is allocated through the deal.
I do believe you can already do that in a prenuptial agreement. In fact, that's the whole point of the document.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on February 10, 2014, 02:42:26 PMI think he just worded it strangely. It's something that's impossible not to worry about, not because you don't trust the person but because you can't help feeling scared. It shouldn't prevent you from getting married though.
I really hope that was a typo.
As has been said, it has nothing to do with the person I'm marrying. I'm just being realistic. I know that even the most perfect relationships can fall apart. That's just life, and it's scary. Shit happens, y'know?
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 10, 2014, 03:18:59 PMI really hope that was a typo.
Haha no, I was talking about Blueflower. No worries Miss Jordan.
You can either fear life and hide, or embrace it and move forward.
o ok
I was like 'SLOW OF ALL PEOPLE?!'
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 10, 2014, 03:23:24 PMYou can either fear life and hide, or embrace it and move forward.
Doesn't mean I'm gonna rush into marriage until I'm ready.
There's no such thing as "I'm Ready".
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 10, 2014, 03:27:21 PMThere's no such thing as "I'm Ready".
but I'm spongebob squarepants
you have no idea how bad i was resisting to post something like that
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 10, 2014, 03:27:21 PMThere's no such thing as "I'm Ready".
I disagree. Once I feel I'm mature enough I will marry.
Snap snap snap
@spit
What...whoever said that? If you did something wrong and never get caught, you don't get punished. Not that I'm encouraging anything of the sort lol. It's not just about cheating. And trying to go to counseling first anyway is probably a better idea xD
*Cue the stuff that was in the Simpsons*
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fmatthewpury.files.wordpress.com%2F2013%2F12%2Fhomer_leering.jpg&hash=79139d5fe752ba14475da7103df5e9ea882e65d4)
Making an ass of yourself at a party is one example. Here's an the part of the episode I couldn't find a video for:
[At Rev. Lovejoy's marriage encounter retreat]
Ned: Sometimes Maude (God bless her), she underlines passages in my Bible because she can't find hers.
Homer: [mutters] Oh. Lucky they don't keep guns in the house.
(Now it's Homer's turn to list Marge's faults.)
Rev.: Marge is going to tell us about your faults, why don't you tell us about hers?
Homer: Oh, she's perfect.
Rev.: Come on, Homer, what are her faults?
Homer: Well, sometimes it can be annoying.
(Then it's Marge's turn.)
Marge: He chews with his mouth open, he gambles, he hangs out at a seedy bar with bums and lowlifes.
Homer: [covers his face] Oh, it's all true!
Rev.: Homer, don't interrupt.
Homer: Sorry.
Marge: He blows his nose on the towels and puts them back in the middle!
Homer: I only did that a couple of times!
(Hours later)
Marge: [hoarsely] He drinks out of the carton. He never changes the baby. When he goes to sleep, he makes chewing noises. When he wakes up, he makes honking noises. Oh, oh, and he scratches himself with his keys. I guess that's it... Oh, no, wait. He kicks me in his sleep and his toenails are too long, and yellow.
Oh yah I agree Ruto. I'm just giving a simple example.
If couples can create a harsh incentive to prevent behavior that threatens their marriage, I don't see why more people don't do it.
"Because I know we'll never cheat on each other, we're in love."
Something along those lines.
I guess people want to have faith in their partner. I personally think what Spit said is a good idea.
If I'm getting married I think I'm gonna be in a civil union first. If things end up not working divorcing isn't gonna be a pain, and if things work out I'll get married (fo real)
Quote from: MaestroUGC on February 10, 2014, 06:57:15 PM"Because I know we'll never cheat on each other, we're in love."
Something along those lines.
Hahahaha! It's so true! But even I, with my incredibly unrealistic views of love, know that there's always a possibility to be tempted. Works when you're single, doesn't work very well when you're taken... Better yet, restrain from doing it at all. XD
Dun dun dun I'm back
so there's this prom thing and all my girl friends except one apparently have all been asked and they came to me and told me I should bring the last friend but just "asking" isn't enough apparently.
What sort of tacky stuff are girls into?
Guys controlling the dancefloor.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 02, 2014, 11:04:49 AMDun dun dun I'm back
so there's this prom thing and all my girl friends except one apparently have all been asked and they came to me and told me I should bring the last friend but just "asking" isn't enough apparently.
What sort of tacky stuff are girls into?
I was basically in the same situation and kinda just awkwardly asked so... can't help you there :P
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 02, 2014, 11:04:49 AMDun dun dun I'm back
so there's this prom thing and all my girl friends except one apparently have all been asked and they came to me and told me I should bring the last friend but just "asking" isn't enough apparently.
What sort of tacky stuff are girls into?
Depends on the dance. If its actually prom, it'd be better to do something fancy (like decorate her car, give her flowers/candy, etc). If its just a smaller thing like Cotillion or Homecoming you could just ask her. Unless shes really high maintenance she won't mind it as a simple question.
For prom, creativity is best. This one girl in my fourth period class was getting a single anonymous rose every period, then the guy revealed himself at the end of the day. Something cute like that should work
On this subject, I got asked on Friday :D Totally a surprise for everyone, especially since I didn't think anyone would actually ask me. The best part is apparently he turned down some other FAR more attractive (like holy shit more attractive) girl and chose me instead
god knows why, i have no find his hidden motive
Quote from: Bubbles on March 02, 2014, 06:04:00 PMDepends on the dance. If its actually prom, it'd be better to do something fancy (like decorate her car, give her flowers/candy, etc). If its just a smaller thing like Cotillion or Homecoming you could just ask her. Unless shes really high maintenance she won't mind it as a simple question.
For prom, creativity is best. This one girl in my fourth period class was getting a single anonymous rose every period, then the guy revealed himself at the end of the day. Something cute like that should work
On this subject, I got asked on Friday :D Totally a surprise for everyone, especially since I didn't think anyone would actually ask me. The best part is apparently he turned down some other FAR more attractive (like holy shit more attractive) girl and chose me instead god knows why, i have no find his hidden motive
I have no idea what it is xD but it is called a "prom"
they all just swarmed me like girls do and asked me if I was taking her...
One of them got a board with the candy messages on it and one got some roses I think...
I don't just want to do something like that to make it seem dull...
how would you prefer someone to ask you to a dance?
It doesn't have to be anything too impressive. Food they like is always good. For example, I knew a guy who had Wetzel's Pretzels shape some pretzels to spell out "PROM?".
Quote from: Bubbles on March 02, 2014, 06:04:00 PMThe best part is apparently he turned down some other FAR more attractive (like holy shit more attractive) girl and chose me instead god knows why, i have no find his hidden motive
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder," as they say.
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 02, 2014, 06:27:36 PMIt doesn't have to be anything too impressive. Food they like is always good. For example, I knew a guy who had Wetzel's Pretzels shape some pretzels to spell out "PROM?".
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.zbrushcentral.com%2Fattachment.php%3Fattachmentid%3D333064&hash=3b795ce6d35ace0548f16c6cc279440f28081605)
http://pusheen.com/post/42150292045
or bears
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi662.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu347%2Fdeku_nut%2F1517571_10151977645493791_1873735811_n_zpsd3c0ae4c.jpg&hash=416afb39c2969d4624be76f091a9a6f654ee7a73)
But you might not be bear-level yet.
Is cake good? Apparently girls like candy, do they like cakes that say prom in icing?
welp be careful not to look like you're overdoing it either :P Might be alrightttt since I know people do elaborate things but just consider that ._.
4 cupcakes with one letter on each of them.
Yeah, definitely go for the cupcakes over the cake.
But it sounds like you are just asking her because you're being told to, so like kefka said don't go too overboard. If its just as friends, candy, a teddy bear, or the cupcake thing should be fine
You guys are really not good at this "prom" thing, are you? Don't worry Nocturne, I got your back on this. Here's what you do:
First, you'll need red paint and a brush. Now go to her neighborhood and paint a red X on every house in there except hers. Now she and her family may or may not start freaking out because they didn't get an X on their house, so the next step is to kill her household's first-born son. No son? Youngest daughter it is! Is it her? Then just, like, key their car or something. Anyway this'll get them super scared and shit. That's when you show up, barely chested, flexing your manly pectorals in splendiforous brilliance. She'll be all like, "My hero!". But that's when one of your friends shows up, pretending to be the culprit behind all the terrorizing acts of terror. Now you're all like, "I'LL PROTECT YOU!" and you fight him. Now take out your trusty bowie knife and proceed to stab him in the chest, carving the word "PROM?" into the chest cavity of his soon-to-be corpse. Then he dies. Then you guys bone or something.
Prom.
If you don't get arrested for vandalism first.
But at least you'll still get laid in prison. Or laid on.
Whichever you prefer.
...Its 11:35pm and I just asked my crush out via facebook.
Apparently she really liked me. I'm at a loss for words haha.
Quote from: zoroark1264 on March 02, 2014, 09:37:22 PM...Its 11:35pm and I just asked my crush out via facebook.
Bad. Shame on you.
Quote from: zoroark1264 on March 02, 2014, 09:37:22 PMApparently she really liked me. I'm at a loss for words haha.
Good. Congratulations!
Okay I'll do the cupcakes thing then!
DANCE NUMBER.
Quote from: zoroark1264 on March 02, 2014, 09:37:22 PM...Its 11:35pm and I just asked my crush out via facebook.
Apparently she really liked me. I'm at a loss for words haha.
Wow, I'm amazed that worked out. I've always been told to
NEVER ask someone out via technology. Then again, I can't say that's entirely true. I'm yet to get to the stage of asking anyone out. :P
Quote from: fingerz on March 03, 2014, 01:48:20 PMWow, I'm amazed that worked out. I've always been told to NEVER ask someone out via technology. Then again, I can't say that's entirely true. I'm yet to get to the stage of asking anyone out. :P
Idk, but it's just way easier too.
Hahahaha! You don't have to see their face, I suppose. Personally, I think confronting someone in real-life would make it much more satisfying. :P
Quote from: fingerz on March 03, 2014, 01:54:17 PMHahahaha! You don't have to see their face, I suppose. Personally, I think confronting someone in real-life would make it much more satisfying. :P
Haha yeah, it's just that it's harder to face possible rejection face-to-face, in my opinion. If they would say yes, I can see your point. :p
Technology is so unromantic.
Congrats! But trust me, it stops being even remotely acceptable later on XD
Lololol
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 03, 2014, 02:43:47 PMCongrats! But trust me, it stops being even remotely acceptable later on XD
Not really xD Maybe when you're older than 30 :P
Well it's not like some people can help it, can they? *COUGH* :P
Update: She said yes
of course
Congrats. Did you go with the cupcakes?
Also,
Quote from: Ruto on March 03, 2014, 06:26:12 PMNot really xD Maybe when you're older than 30 :P
Ehhhhhh. Idk. It's definitely a lot
less acceptable, and if you're to accept the cliche that women like confidence (and that seems to be pretty true for a lot of people), it seems pretty bad for an adult/near adult not to have the balls to ask in person :/ not that I'm saying that asking somebody out is one-sided as far as gender goes, but still. I've actually gotten asked out through friends before, and it definitely had some part in my saying no (another part was that I literally talked to the girl for 5 minutes, so it was a little weird for her to be so forward yet not want to do it in person). Just in general, in person > not in person. It may be less comfortable at the time, but it's much better in the long run.
Quote from: fingerz on March 03, 2014, 01:48:20 PMWow, I'm amazed that worked out. I've always been told to NEVER ask someone out via technology. Then again, I can't say that's entirely true. I'm yet to get to the stage of asking anyone out. :P
Quote from: fingerz on March 05, 2014, 05:03:45 PMWell it's not like some people can help it, can they? *COUGH* :P
....(death stare)....
>:( sus~
It's easier for me to close the chat program than to run away in real life.
I remember back when I was a kid when this guy tried to ask this girl out, and the whole class was staring at the two when he was asking. The girl turned pink and I think with that kind of pressure, you don't actually do what you would want to do?
(It was also creepy because they were both 11. Ick...)
cooties too stronk
Quote from: Ruto on March 06, 2014, 01:36:11 PMIt's easier for me to close the chat program than to run away in real life.
I remember back when I was a kid when this guy tried to ask this girl out, and the whole class was staring at the two when he was asking. The girl turned pink and I think with that kind of pressure, you don't actually do what you would want to do?
(It was also creepy because they were both 11. Ick...)
I mean, first of all there's a difference between doing it in person and doing it in public XD
Second, I'm not sure if you're talking about the person asking or being asked running away, haha. Either way though, for the person asking, it's better not to run away/close out of that sort of thing if you want to stay friends after that, because you're at least made to discuss it rather than pretending that it didn't happen, which wouldn't really solve anything. Unresolved tensions like that are awful, in my experience.
For the person being asked, running away/closing out is kind of just rude, really :P
I ran away from a girl who asked me out xD. I was in 6th grade and thought she was really weird and people had been telling me for days that she was gonna ask me... guess the anticipation got the best of me.
Being asked, I guess? There was this guy that was being all creepy to me online some years back (Concerto can tell you this too). In real life, he really could have done more than just talk, you know. I did tell him I wasn't interested first, of course.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on March 06, 2014, 02:51:27 PMcooties too stronk
eww cooties *swats at air*
Quote from: Ruto on March 06, 2014, 06:43:28 PMBeing asked, I guess? There was this guy that was being all creepy to me online some years back (Concerto can tell you this too). In real life, he really could have done more than just talk, you know. I did tell him I wasn't interested first, of course.
Is this...that guy?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 06, 2014, 08:58:39 PMIs this...that guy?
That guy from my old college that would randomly find me sometimes on my way to class (so I'm in a hurry and not have time for chatting much), that was messaging me at 1 am asking me to drink with him, or to come over to his room and study (lounge is better, thanks), and then pretty much got more disturbing after that.
^le french guy???
But I have done lots of thinking recently about my current relationship status.
Right now, I am perfectly fine being single (I'm still getting my groove at work, completely broke for the first year I'm living here and the fact I am enjoying my alone time), but there always comes a point where I feel like I would be so much happier in a relationship.
I mean, I keep thinking that I want to share my life with some girl that I adore very much, when we can go hiking and wine tasting on the weekends and enjoy eating awesome food at really awesome restaurants and can travel around the world together and enjoy each others' company.
I have all these feelings pent up inside with almost no one on which to project them... and not to mention all my friends are away at school or a different part of the world. Needless to say, I feel someone is absent and I need more.
The best (or worst) part of all of this is that I am horrible with relationships, since I only had 1 relationship in high school that was a "kind of" relationship (we never said that we were or weren't in one), but it was evidenced in the fact that I had a $600 texting bill (also evidences the fact I'm old when my old cellphone plan allotted 300 texts... and that was ALOT).
I don't know what to think about all this and I am realizing this is going to be hard for me. I have never been really close with anyone (not even my family).
Hell, if I can't find a girl with who I can share my life, I can make some guy friends and live with them and travel around with them, too.
idk what to think now. Ugh.
/rant
I'm sorta in the same boat as you, DrP.
I've had only one super-serious relationship, and looking back on it, it really was NOT worth it.
And I'm wondering if relationships are (for me at least) even worth the time.
What I want to do is just have a close group of friends who I go on adventures with.
Kman may be my best friend, but he's always really busy, and he puts work before anything else (Which is good, but frustrating.)
I was recently in my school's production of guys and dolls, though, and everyone who was in that (or at least most of us) are hanging out outside of school. We've formed a drama club, and we're going to see a movie on Saturday.
But with all that being said, I really don't like being alone.
And next year, I'm going to be the most alone I've ever been. The majority of my IRL friends are graduating and going on to college, while I'm stuck in another year of high school due to screwing around too much my freshman year.
This means I'll be seeing Kman even less, if at all.
And I don't know if I can do that.
Yeah, I hear you.
I have to put work ahead of everything right now, which is good because I can't spend extra money on going out with anyone right now or even hanging out with friends for an extended period of time.
I would've liked to stay in college for another year to be surrounded by friends, but that means LITTLE to NO income and remaining stagnant for a year essentially.
Now that I am working hella long hours, I have some money to pay bills, but I have nothing to do otherwise.
At least you'll head to college in a year.. All it takes is a year and you can move on!
Nope, not the French guy XD
Yeah, bad experiences don't help... After engaging in a relationship with someone I didn't really like in that way for a few months, it scarred me for life. I get awkward if I hug females now and I feel sick if I start to think of anyone in a way more than friends. XDD
There is this girl I've been madly in love with for like ages, and that I think about absolutely every day. But when I met her today, for the first time in about two weeks, I realized that she had changed. When I then talked to her I suddenly realized that I am not in love with her anymore.
I don't know if it's just temporarily, but I really can't say I'm in love with her anymore.
Drastically loosing the feelings I had for someone is one of the wierdest things I've ever experienced. A lot of crazy feelings have now just started popping up, like some sorta relief, and a slight depressesion. The state of my mind is so weird I don't think I can stand up for the rest of the day. I'll just go to bed, I think.
Sorry, I just really needed to vent this out to get my mind straight.
Love is not a permanent state of emotion, it tends to come and go in cycles whenever you fall for someone and as such it takes a bit of work to maintain that state of bliss. That said, it is entirely possible that you fell out of love for her and that's completely natural. Once you leave that state of being, you tend to notice the person far differently than before, and odds are that she didn't change that much, but your perception of her did.
Don't worry about it or freak out because of this. It's completely natural and part of being human. Just take a moment to sort out these thoughts and feelings and see if she really changed or you are just seeing her in a more objective light.
Relationships are weird
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 10, 2014, 10:44:01 AMLove is not a permanent state of emotion, it tends to come and go in cycles whenever you fall for someone and as such it takes a bit of work to maintain that state of bliss. That said, it is entirely possible that you fell out of love for her and that's completely natural. Once you leave that state of being, you tend to notice the person far differently than before, and odds are that she didn't change that much, but your perception of her did.
Don't worry about it or freak out because of this. It's completely natural and part of being human. Just take a moment to sort out these thoughts and feelings and see if she really changed or you are just seeing her in a more objective light.
thanks for writing that. After drowning my thoughts in hours of aggressive sax-jamming I think I've concluded that I've just plainly fallen out of love with her, for some reason or another. I'm over that little depression, but now it just feels so weird; I can't remember the last time I didn't have someone I was in love with.
Quote from: Jompa on March 10, 2014, 01:52:56 PMAfter drowning my thoughts in hours of aggressive sex-jamming.
Definitely what I read.
^Same here
I can think of at least one person that I like more and more every time I talk to them xD I don't ever see a possibility of falling out of love completely.
Heyyy I read sax the first time until you guys posted that. Now I got it confused with what you guys said D:
Yeah, if you really get hit hard by da lovins, its difficult to shake even with the passage of time. This I know far too well. And it sucks, big time.
SFK keeps getting suckerpunched by life
Quote from: Jompa on March 10, 2014, 01:52:56 PMthanks for writing that. After drowning my thoughts in hours of aggressive sax-jamming I think I've concluded that I've just plainly fallen out of love with her, for some reason or another. I'm over that little depression, but now it just feels so weird; I can't remember the last time I didn't have someone I was in love with.
Adding to what Maestro said: In my experience, as you get older, and you experience other personalities on a larger scale; when looking back at that one person you sort of realize that there are these underlying qualities about their personality that you realize weren't all that attractive to begin with. You may not even be fully aware of why, but you know you don't feel that near-obsessive draw towards that person. That's definitely a relief in my book. The only thing you have to forgive yourself for is the time you can't get back investing into that someone. Who really cares though since it's all a learning experience in the end.
Indeed. Also hello Nakah, it's been a while
Apparently I'm absolutely terrible at talking to someone who I like/likes me...today was pretty embarrassing
Oh god I know that feel. There's this really really cute guy I like/liked/idk what the heck it is anymore and whenever I ran into him in the laundry room or at dinner or something he would say hi and I'd just sort of freeze and stammer something awkward
But it wasn't even when I was talking to him, but afterwards I started seriously blushing and shaking im such a fucking wimp
Quote from: Nakah on March 11, 2014, 01:57:24 PMAdding to what Maestro said: In my experience, as you get older, and you experience other personalities on a larger scale; when looking back at that one person you sort of realize that there are these underlying qualities about their personality that you realize weren't all that attractive to begin with. You may not even be fully aware of why, but you know you don't feel that near-obsessive draw towards that person. That's definitely a relief in my book. The only thing you have to forgive yourself for is the time you can't get back investing into that someone. Who really cares though since it's all a learning experience in the end.
True, I've pretty much ended up losing all attraction towards all of my exes, regardless of who ended the relationship. Doesn't stop me from my current hopeless romantic obsession, though :/
Quote from: Bubbles on March 11, 2014, 04:33:16 PMBut it wasn't even when I was talking to him, but afterwards I started seriously blushing and shaking im such a fucking wimp
Me at the end of a romantic snowman-building date with this girl I'd been talking to over winter break: invite her into my room to hang out for a bit longer, she has to go to work right after so she can't sit or take off her jacket or anything, so we're both just standing awkwardly, making light conversation that we both know can't continue for over like five minutes, she has to leave and I'm just like, caught in the limbo of "to hug or not to hug", end up hugging but it's after an awkward pause, she's leaving through the hallway and I just walk out of sight and start silently cussing myself out. And that's set the tone for the rest of our interaction to date.
So, yeah, I know how you feel.
I keep becoming really good friends with people and then suddenly realizing I hate everything about them.
This is really annoying.
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 11, 2014, 06:26:37 PMMe at the end of a romantic snowman-building date with this girl I'd been talking to over winter break: invite her into my room to hang out for a bit longer, she has to go to work right after so she can't sit or take off her jacket or anything, so we're both just standing awkwardly, making light conversation that we both know can't continue for over like five minutes, she has to leave and I'm just like, caught in the limbo of "to hug or not to hug", end up hugging but it's after an awkward pause, she's leaving through the hallway and I just walk out of sight and start silently cussing myself out. And that's set the tone for the rest of our interaction to date.
Awkward xD might have been better not to have made her come out of her way if she couldn't stay for more than a few minutes. There isn't really a good outcome to that. She could end up being late for work and then quietly blame you for it.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 11, 2014, 06:53:35 PMI keep becoming really good friends with people and then suddenly realizing I hate everything about them.
This is really annoying.
Are you looking on purpose or...? I think there's a term for that, but I don't recall it.
Ugh I know, but she didn't even tell me until we got to my room XD there wasn't too much I could do, except not be an awkward fuck about it, but that wasn't too successful...
Haha well she didn't speak up, so she's probably awkward about stuff too! xD I guess the next time that happens, tell her to just go to work so she won't get in trouble :P
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 11, 2014, 06:53:35 PMI keep becoming really good friends with people and then suddenly realizing I hate everything about them.
This is really annoying.
Slow, you just need to look at positives in people focereal. It doesn't mean overlooking negative aspects, since flaws make us human. But don't let negative things affect why people are your friends, since they must've done something right to become your friend in the first place.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 11, 2014, 11:42:30 AMSFK keeps getting suckerpunched by life
If my experience has taught me anything, its that all girls worth investing time in are either engaged, secretly awful, or lesbians. Emphasis on that last one cuz I am magnetically pulled to girls with short hair, so you can imagine it tends to create problems for me.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 11, 2014, 10:22:20 PMIf my experience has taught me anything, its that all girls worth investing time in are either engaged, secretly awful, or lesbians. Emphasis on that last one cuz I am magnetically pulled to girls with short hair, so you can imagine it tends to create problems for me.
I blame Florida for all that. Florida is like 90% weirdos, so yeah..
We should have gone to bars when you were in San Diego (except we both weren't 21 then...)
Yeah, Florida has some strange folks. And I'm usually hanging around the strangest of the strange. And you know if someone's weird by my standards, they're fuckin' weird.(Sunday I had the pleasure of almost witnessing two large, bisexual, alcoholic goth females decorated in excessive amounts of tattoos pull out their breast in a bar. I managed to avert my eyes in time. One was possibly transgender, the other often tries to perform sexual acts on drunken men in the bar, with moderate success.)
I go to that bar every Sunday just to hang out with a borderline alcoholic dude and a girl I like who's in a committed relationship with a guy she loves.
Luckily I'll be out of this state by this time next year with an AA and no direction.
Quote from: Ruto on March 11, 2014, 09:40:50 PMHaha well she didn't speak up, so she's probably awkward about stuff too! xD I guess the next time that happens, tell her to just go to work so she won't get in trouble :P
Ugh, that was a while ago, from the way things are going I don't think things are gonna end well with her XD
Good news though, this RIDICULOUSLY CUTE GIRL (LIKE, QUITE POSSIBLY THE CUTEST GIRL I'VE EVER MET) was flirting with me in the elevator today. When we were walking into the building we did the whole "one person holds the first door, the next goes in and opens the next door for them" thing; it was pretty adorable, if I do say so myself. And then we talked some more in the elevator. Bad news is, I got out of the elevator without knowing her name, and I don't even know what floor she lives on because she was going to the penthouse (we have a study lounge there).
Welp, guess I'll have to go to the study lounge more often. What a great excuse to be productive.
Warning: that can just as well mean 0 romantic interest, as those are fairly standard just friendly interactions :P
Not that it feels or is bad to have that sort of companionship!
Haha no yeah, I know that XD usually I'm really bad at reading people, so I don't make those kinds of assumptions, but from our conversation in the elevator, she was pretty blatantly flirting. She laughed a lot, and was blushing at one point, and just...general cues
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 02:28:55 AMHaha no yeah, I know that XD usually I'm really bad at reading people, so I don't make those kinds of assumptions, but from our conversation in the elevator, she was pretty blatantly flirting. She laughed a lot, and was blushing at one point, and just...general cues
Yeah, that's def flirting :) Some people just aren't familiar enough with it to recognize it haha.
though tbh just forget about girls and start playing for the other team because hotdamn
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 12, 2014, 06:53:03 AMthough tbh just forget about girls and start playing for the other team because hotdamn
This
I need straight guys but they confuse me because why
Straight guys are so dumb. I can't believe how obsessed they are with sex
Edit: Just in case this sounded offensive, what I mean by this is that so many guys are motivated purely by sex and they just give no thought about anything else. I hate that
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on March 12, 2014, 12:40:08 AMYeah, Florida has some strange folks.
http://www.reddit.com/r/FloridaMan
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 02:15:41 AMWhen we were walking into the building we did the whole "one person holds the first door, the next goes in and opens the next door for them" thing; it was pretty adorable, if I do say so myself. And then we talked some more in the elevator.
I used to do that with my old professor. And no xD
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 02:15:41 AMI don't even know what floor she lives on because she was going to the penthouse (we have a study lounge there).
Welp, guess I'll have to go to the study lounge more often. What a great excuse to be productive.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi662.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu347%2Fdeku_nut%2F47400d04-24b1-4684-9754-c8c0170601dd_zps9be3a6ca.png&hash=2f0af5978d3f815da89e31ce2027c79b945e8f95)
Just sayin'
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 12, 2014, 03:49:42 PMStraight guys are so dumb. I can't believe how obsessed they are with sex
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 12, 2014, 03:49:42 PMStraight guys are so dumb. I can't believe how obsessed they are with sex
Edit: Just in case this sounded offensive, what I mean by this is that so many guys are motivated purely by sex and they just give no thought about anything else. I hate that
That sounds like a bias that isn't actually based on any fact or observation at all.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 12, 2014, 06:19:43 PMThat sounds like a bias that isn't actually based on any fact or observation at all.
I think "stereotype" would be a better word.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 12, 2014, 06:19:43 PMThat sounds like a bias that isn't actually based on any fact or observation at all.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on March 12, 2014, 06:48:40 PMI think "stereotype" would be a better word.
...It's still true.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 12, 2014, 03:49:42 PMStraight guys are so dumb. I can't believe how obsessed they are with sex
WHOA! ALRIGHT THEN! You're not a straight guy either? Not motivated by sex, Slow? :P
No, I kid. It's concerning how many people think about that, though, particularly men. It's not just men, though... XD
Quote from: Ruto on March 12, 2014, 03:53:53 PMQuote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 02:15:41 AMWhen we were walking into the building we did the whole "one person holds the first door, the next goes in and opens the next door for them" thing; it was pretty adorable, if I do say so myself.
I used to do that with my old professor. And no xD
SHE BLUSHED AND GIGGLED DAMNIT, IT'S DIFFERENT
Also, the last girl I did this with ended up essentially asking me out after having talked for all of five minutes, so idk, maybe your professor was actually into you XD
Quote from: Ruto on March 12, 2014, 03:53:53 PMQuote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 02:15:41 AMpenthouse
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi662.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu347%2Fdeku_nut%2F47400d04-24b1-4684-9754-c8c0170601dd_zps9be3a6ca.png&hash=2f0af5978d3f815da89e31ce2027c79b945e8f95)
Just sayin'
Cost of attendance is over $60,000 a year, I'd say having a penthouse study lounge in a dorm is pretty reasonable XD (not that I actually pay that much, but yeah)
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 12, 2014, 06:19:43 PMThat sounds like a bias that isn't actually based on any fact or observation at all.
I guess it fits well with the genero frat/douchey guy stereotype, and a lot of this forum seems to have had the misfortune of only having such despicable company.
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 12, 2014, 09:50:59 PMso idk, maybe your professor was actually into you XD
Oh no you didn't! :o 1) He's married 2) I deserved that A!!!
Friend of a friend pays $5000 rent/month for a place with some penthouses and elevators. But I guess your school owns the building and it's not all coming out of your pocket. I don't care so much where I live as long as it's an education. IIRC Marie Curie lived in a tiny apartment with no heat in her college days, so she slept with all her room's furniture piled on top of her for warmth. It certaintly motivated her to try even harder and built character #dailystruggle
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 12, 2014, 03:49:42 PMStraight guys are so dumb. I can't believe how obsessed they are with sex
Edit: Just in case this sounded offensive, what I mean by this is that so many guys are motivated purely by sex and they just give no thought about anything else. I hate that
I thought it was an evolutionary thing. Like male's evolutionary role is to shag anything that moves, so they do.
Quote from: fingerz on March 12, 2014, 08:23:56 PMWHOA! ALRIGHT THEN! You're not a straight guy either? Not motivated by sex, Slow? :P
No, I kid. It's concerning how many people think about that, though, particularly men. It's not just men, though... XD
No I'm not quite straight, and I'm not motivated by sex either xD I care way more about intellectual pursuits than sex
And yeah girls are horny af too but they'll at least talk to people they aren't interested in having sex with, whereas a lot of guys won't
I talk to you all and I do have a vested interest in having sex with, like, at least 6 of you.
You know who you are...
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 13, 2014, 06:15:39 AMNo I'm not quite straight, and I'm not motivated by sex either xD I care way more about intellectual pursuits than sex
And yeah girls are horny af too but they'll at least talk to people they aren't interested in having sex with, whereas a lot of guys won't
I just talk to my friends
regardless of gender
of course I talk about different stuff with girls
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 13, 2014, 07:25:50 AMI talk to you all and I do have a vested interest in having sex with, like, at least 6 of you.
You know who you are...
shit
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 13, 2014, 07:25:50 AMI talk to you all and I do have a vested interest in having sex with, like, at least 6 of you.
You know who you are...
my room. 10 PM sharp.
be there.
Quote from: Clanker37 on March 13, 2014, 02:10:51 AMshag
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ollieanddarsh.co.uk%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F09%2Faustin-powers-3.jpg&hash=7c0f2b1a00e6f6fcb7ba91924104cc090797782c)
Sorry, it's just that when I realize that people in other countries actually use words I only know from Austin Powers, I get kind of excited...
Quote from: Bubbles on March 13, 2014, 01:32:07 PMWell now we know 3 of the 6
care to make it a foursome
Quote from: FierceDeity on March 13, 2014, 11:40:53 AM(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ollieanddarsh.co.uk%2Fblog%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F09%2Faustin-powers-3.jpg&hash=7c0f2b1a00e6f6fcb7ba91924104cc090797782c)
Sorry, it's just that when I realize that people in other countries actually use words I only know from Austin Powers, I get kind of excited...
:D <3
Quote from: K-NiGhT on March 13, 2014, 09:01:33 AMmy room. 10 PM sharp.
be there.
Haha, nonono. You will be ready for the sex when I say so. When I say "Drop 'em", you should already be naked.
Quote from: Yugi on March 13, 2014, 01:42:34 PMcare to make it a foursome
Now, now, folks. There's plenty of Maestro to go around.
If you know what I mean...
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 13, 2014, 09:33:53 PMThere's plenty of Maestro to go around.
If you know what I mean...
Oh yes. How we know...
Heracles did 50 in one night and got everyone pregnant with sons somehow.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heracles#Affairs
And people call that impressive?
I call it a warm-up.
Alright, that's enough of that for now.
To be fair he was drunk wasn't he?
I'm getting married in a week and a half. Shit is getting real
omggggggggg
wa. Forlz?
Yes forlz
Wow, congrats!
Wow, so sudden!
Congrats :D
Quote from: Roz~ on March 18, 2014, 07:30:41 AMI'm getting married in a week and a half. Shit is getting real
</3
dreams crushed
crying
I need rebound
where's slow
That deadline doe. Wish I could be there, would had most definitely come if I had the age and money to travel.
Tell your bf to never let go. Gotta come up with a Pokemon gift.
Dropping in to congratulate Roz! :D
Congratz Roz!!
Quote from: Waddle Bro on March 18, 2014, 12:38:15 PM</3
dreams crushed
crying
I need rebound
where's slow
That deadline doe. Wish I could be there, would had most definitely come if I had the age and money to travel.
Tell your bf to never let go. Gotta come up with a Pokemon gift.
xDDD Hmm, maybe I should send a card too!
Wow that's great! Good for you two. Where is it gonna be held?
Thanks everyone! We're going for a civil union frst because we're flat broke and a wedding is kind of a hassle to plan in the middle of the school year. We're planning on getting married in the near future though. I should totes invite my NSM crew (which means pretty much everyone) to the wedding hehe :D
I expect my invitation to be encrusted with sapphires and the dried tears of baby miniature horses.
It should be doable.
Quote from: Roz~ on March 18, 2014, 03:10:55 PMThanks everyone! We're going for a civil union frst because we're flat broke and a wedding is kind of a hassle to plan in the middle of the school year. We're planning on getting married in the near future though. I should totes invite my NSM crew (which means pretty much everyone) to the wedding hehe :D
OH MY GOD. CONGRATS WIFEY. <3
Yay Roz!!! Congrats!
(now if only you guys were getting married in July because I'll be in Canada then! -- but that doesn't matter)
i really want to send you a card or something
(or like a plusle & minun or some other male/female pokemon duo dressed up in a wedding gown and tux)
Thanks guys <3
Well if you really wanna send a card or something know that I moved so my address changed =P
My brother owns our previous house so it doesn't really matter if you send it to my old address I guess
Ah shit kinda late but congrats roz!!!!!
wups forgot to post now I can be even later than you /o\
congrats O:
what that is such awesome news congrats bro! :D
gonna be an awesome time (y)
So I'd figured out how I was gonna ask out the girl of my dreams. Our friendship has included building snowmen on a whim, watching pixar movies, going to concerts, and talking about/watching Pokemon, and she is literally the cutest girl I've ever met. I was going to ask her to dinner in a way it's obviously a date (apparently that's not already apparent by just asking a girl to dinner, this college dating scene is confusing), then just be honest with her about how I feel at the end of the date. Credible sources have reassured me this was good, and call me hopeful, but I think she'd have said yes. All of this was set to go down today and tomorrow (I'm pretty familiar with her schedule, wednesday nights are basically the only time she has to do something like that), and then last night I got the GODDAMN STOMACH FLU.
Forget the fact that, due to conference scheduling issues, I'm going to have to beg my professor for a week-long extension on this paper. I'm way more irritated about this.
she's so fucking cute you guys
Then ask her out later.
Haha yeah, it's more just the fact that I have to postpone something I was really excited about that bothers me.
Ugh lucky sonofabitch. You, ETF, and Roz can all go punch each other with toasters or something while congratulating each other on your success in the game of love.
Meanwhile, SFK is just trying to find opportunities to strike up conversation with a cute YMCA employee. And NSM as a whole remains relatively celibate.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 08, 2014, 03:03:23 PMgo punch each other with toasters or something
New favorite NSM quote.
And I mean, we'll see how lucky I really am when I get better and actually ask her, haha.
...as for pickup advice for that cute YMCA girl, perhaps somebody with dating experience outside of the stereotypical "mutual friends already let both parties know that they're into one another" high school experience could help you with that, because I got nothin.
Lol. As if I wanted a romantic relationship
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 08, 2014, 04:09:11 PMLol. As if I wanted a romantic relationship
http://www.sadtrombone.com/?play=true
Out of curiosity, when is the right time to ask someone if they're single?
Quote from: Ruto on April 08, 2014, 06:56:23 PMOut of curiosity, when is the right time to ask someone if they're single?
That's a pickup line
Quote from: Ruto on April 08, 2014, 06:56:23 PMOut of curiosity, when is the right time to ask someone if they're single?
Don't. Just ask them out and tell them that if they're already taken, they'd better break up.
Quote from: Ruto on April 08, 2014, 06:56:23 PMOut of curiosity, when is the right time to ask someone if they're single?
Who asks nowadays, this is what Facebook stalking is for ;)
Quote from: zoroark1264 on April 08, 2014, 06:59:01 PMDon't. Just ask them out and tell them that if they're already taken, they'd better break up.
Zoroark: tapping ass and forgetting names since 2001.
I haven't thought of asking that question to be a necessity, since I've always gotten to know someone to a point where I would know that fact before I would seriously consider anything else. I suppose there are those guys that just try to pick up girls wherever, but given that that's their line of thinking it probably doesn't matter at all when/if they ask ._.
Ohh...I only reluctantly add people on Facebook. Some people really like to hide those facts xD I guess that's not such a good thing to do now ._.
I think if you just ask someone out or show general interest, they'll usually tell you they're taken unless they're not happy with their relationship or they're a not-nice person.
I dunno, I just watched Office Space again, and I'm feeling really 'don't give a fuck' now. I just might ask cute YMCA girl if she wants to have lunch next time I see her, cuz why not? Like, I just realized I'm at that age where going for a cup of coffee or lunch are now stuff I can do.
She's gonna say yes 'cause you're awsmsauce. Also lunch and coffee are fun. Doing stuff with someone and not for someone helps with the friendzone problem apparently.
Yeah, what's the worst that can happen? xD There aren't that many sane people in Florida from what I've heard :P She's missing out!
It's really nice when people say yes to coffee or lunch because everyone is busy and I have no social life outside of work at the moment... It'll change in like 8 months, but until then... nothing
So, cute ymca girl has a boyfriend. Wonderful...
back to the drawing board...
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 10, 2014, 05:43:12 PMSo, cute ymca girl has a boyfriend. Wonderful...
back to the drawing board...
Quote from: zoroark1264 on April 08, 2014, 06:59:01 PM...tell them that if they're already taken, they'd better break up.
Hint hintNever mind, that's a bad idea. xD
Quote from: Zunawe on April 13, 2014, 02:58:45 PMI had to give up a friend last Wednesday because she didn't want to jeopardize her relationship, and I've been feeling terrible since then.
It's kinda a long story. We met in the pit orchestra for Sweeney Todd; after that ended, I got her phone number. She told me she wanted to be careful about texting guys because her boyfriend got jealous, so I was careful about letting her start the conversations. That basically got thrown out the window, and I gave up trying to help. Over spring break we both sent each other in excess of 150 messages a day. Her boyfriend got upset when she told him, as you could imagine, so we decided not to talk over the phone.
After a few days, she asked me for math tutoring, so I agreed, and helped her for a few days. One morning, her boyfriend apparently came looking for her, saw her talking to me, and got really mad about it. I don't know what he said to her or what she said to him, but she ended up telling me that I couldn't be in her life at all anymore, and I'm just really depressed.
Yes, I liked her. Yes, I told her. I also told her that I didn't expect anything at all from her. She also flat out said that she would have gone out with me if she didn't have a boyfriend, and was pretty blatant in general about liking me back as much as she would let herself.
So there's my "My Life Sucks" story... I feel stuck... Maybe saying something will help.
Nope, can't do it. Every single thing I do, every other thing somebody else says, and I could just snap right there. I'm stuck between what I want for myself and what I want for her, and I can't think anymore. She's not going to break up with her boyfriend. But I'm terrified to completely accept the not only possible, but probable outcome that I never talk to her again. And I see her every other day. I feel like exploding.
Ok, so uh, wow. Everything changed for the better last night.
So, things with that girl I talked about last have still been pretty unclear, but it seems to me that signs point to "trying to let me down easy". I actually no longer care about that though, because...
One night, my friends and I were slightly inebriated, and they convinced me to get a Tinder profile. So I'm like, sure, why not. And even though I got a decent amount of matches, I didn't really do anything on it other than mess around for a while. I wasn't taking it seriously, because it usually ends up being more of a casual hookup app, and I don't really want that; if I did, I've had plenty enough opportunities this semester, anyways...
But then last night I matched with this absurdly cute girl. Her main picture is of her on the iron throne from GoT, and two more are of her in a tardis dress. Off to a great start. I start talking to her, say the amount of TV references in her pictures is impressive, she says thanks, the amount of attractive pictures in yours is impressive, too.
Oh shit, it's on. It is so on.
So we hit it off, talked until like 4 am, and this whole situation just started seeming more and more awesome:
1. She has an awesome sense of humor.
2. She literally brought up Twitch Plays Pokemon without me saying anything to warrant it.
3. HOLY SHIT WAIT SHE LIVES IN MY BUILDING
That last one kind of blew my mind. Like, I've lived in the same dorm as this awesome person for over 6 months, and I haven't even known. And to think I was so worried about things with this other girl who I don't have nearly as much chemistry with. Tinder, I'm sorry I ever doubted you.
Anyways, texting her, it already feels infinitely more like a relationship than with anyone else I've met at college, and we haven't even met up in real life yet (she's out of town for the weekend, urghhh). Once she's back and we're both free, though...goddamn, I am excited.
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 01:09:59 PMOk, so uh, wow. Everything changed for the better last night.
So, things with that girl I talked about last have still been pretty unclear, but it seems to me that signs point to "trying to let me down easy". I actually no longer care about that though, because...
One night, my friends and I were slightly inebriated, and they convinced me to get a Tinder profile. So I'm like, sure, why not. And even though I got a decent amount of matches, I didn't really do anything on it other than mess around for a while. I wasn't taking it seriously, because it usually ends up being more of a casual hookup app, and I don't really want that; if I did, I've had plenty enough opportunities this semester, anyways...
But then last night I matched with this absurdly cute girl. Her main picture is of her on the iron throne from GoT, and two more are of her in a tardis dress. Off to a great start. I start talking to her, say the amount of TV references in her pictures is impressive, she says thanks, the amount of attractive pictures in yours is impressive, too.
Oh shit, it's on. It is so on.
So we hit it off, talked until like 4 am, and this whole situation just started seeming more and more awesome:
1. She has an awesome sense of humor.
2. She literally brought up Twitch Plays Pokemon without me saying anything to warrant it.
3. HOLY SHIT WAIT SHE LIVES IN MY BUILDING
That last one kind of blew my mind. Like, I've lived in the same dorm as this awesome person for over 6 months, and I haven't even known. And to think I was so worried about things with this other girl who I don't have nearly as much chemistry with. Tinder, I'm sorry I ever doubted you.
Anyways, texting her, it already feels infinitely more like a relationship than with anyone else I've met at college, and we haven't even met up in real life yet (she's out of town for the weekend, urghhh). Once she's back and we're both free, though...goddamn, I am excited.
That sounds...
either creepy or extremely fortunate.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 18, 2014, 01:16:43 PMThat sounds...
either creepy or extremely fortunate.
how would you even come to that conclusion, it's the second one
Guys and Girls:
If you like someone I strongly suggest you be friends with them first for like a year and hold off any initial emotions you may have. Get to REALLYYYY know them or else you're going to be in for a massive, massive, massive, headache. At first, that feeling of having a crush on someone tends to overrule logical decision making. The infatuation period should go away after a while (varies by person). That's when you can really make decisions regarding how much you like the other. During the infatuation period everything is going to amazing. Any small detail any little thing you have in common will be blown out of proportion in your head. Any negative traits will be largely ignored.
Guys approaching girls:
Don't start by asking to lunch or coffee. That stuff only works in movies or if the girl is actively looking for someone at the moment, which is rare. Most girls are either taken or not looking. What are the chances that the girl you end up with in the future is currently single? Not high. Make friends with everyone single or not and have a good time regardless. If it's "meant to be" then you'll both come to some kind of realization eventually regardless of the initial circumstances upon which you met. Conversely, girls that are currently taken shouldn't close themselves off completely. Obviously this does not apply to relationships that have already been established very strongly. One thing to note however is that length of time is not necessarily a good indicator of relationship strength.
So the lunch or coffee thing not working? No of course the girl will be weirded out. The most important thing is that first conversation. Make it meaningful and really try to find common ground. Something that could become chronic. How to make the first conversation happen? If you periodically talk to each other no problem. If you are admiring her from a distance (why do you like her anyway... but ok let's give the benefit of the doubt I am guilty of this kind of affection as well), create a scenario in which you are forced to interact. Make it clever and subtle.
Girls:
You have it easy gtfo.
Thoughts/discussions?
Yeah...you don't have much real world experience, do you?
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMIf you like someone I strongly suggest you be friends with them first for like a year
If you want to torture yourself and risk infinite friendzoning, sure.
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMDon't start by asking to lunch or coffee.
Unless you feel like having a nice afternoon with someone you're attracted to, sure.
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMMost girls are either taken or not looking.
Completely wrong, but sure.
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMcreate a scenario in which you are forced to interact.
Yes, because overthinking things make everything better, so sure.
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMGirls:
You have it easy gtfo.
Not true, but our society has developed the idea that requires men to initiate interaction and dating shit, while women are supposed to wait because if they took the role of "asking out" it could be seen as too forward or even creepy. But with women becoming more and more independent, these social stigmas are likely to change.
You obviously have yet to be introduced to the concept of "Risk and Reward".
Girls:
All guys love food. Easy bait.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 18, 2014, 03:31:50 PMIf you want to torture yourself and risk infinite friendzoning, sure.
I don't think getting to know somebody before you start dating them always means getting "friendzoned." Unless I'm mistaken, the point Psychic_Ness is trying to make is that some people don't like it if you try and rush into a relationship.
But a year? Come on.
That was really sexist to say girls have it easy. :P Also the fact that you're telling people to be friends for a year before dating tells me you know nothing about dating lololol
Certainly it's fine in some situations but it is not by any stretch of the imagination necessary or even beneficial all the time
I'm gonna have to agree with SFK here. The absurdly long year wait aside, getting to know somebody outside of a relationship is
completely different than getting to know them in a relationship. I see some of my closest friends reveal parts of themselves to somebody they're dating that I never even knew existed; not to mention, this has happened with a lot of the girls I've dated (one of which was after being friends for two years, so no, it wasn't a "I just didn't spend a long enough time getting to know her" thing). So many people spend all of their time masking some part of themselves that they don't think other people will like, but once they get intimate with somebody, they feel they can finally be open. And that's when you find out whether it'll really work or not.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on April 18, 2014, 03:58:18 PMI don't think getting to know somebody before you start dating them always means getting "friendzoned." Unless I'm mistaken, the point Psychic_Ness is trying to make is that some people don't like it if you try and rush into a relationship.
Well, it doesn't
always mean getting friendzoned, but if there's a spark and you don't take advantage of it, it may die down before you have a chance to get to know somebody in a truly intimate manner. And yeah, some people don't like "rushing" into relationships. But not all.
And to recapitulate SFK's point, holy shit a year is such an absurdly long amount of time.
I've known someone for a year but she doesn't remember me for half of that year what do I do?????????
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 05:09:17 PMWell, it doesn't always mean getting friendzoned, but if there's a spark and you don't take advantage of it, it may die down before you have a chance to get to know somebody in a truly intimate manner.
He said "get to know the person," not "isolate them and ignore anything other than friendship," which in and of itself could be considered "friendzoning." :P That should be fairly obvious- it's not like you ignore all common sense just because you don't leap into a relationship right away. Though, he did say to "hold off any initial emotions you may have," which I agree is quite extreme.
QuoteAnd to recapitulate SFK's point, holy shit a year is such an absurdly long amount of time.
While this is true, he didn't say that you had to for a year; specifically, he said "for like a year." TECHNICALITIES!
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on April 18, 2014, 05:22:50 PM"isolate them and ignore anything other than friendship"
Wait what is "anything other than friendship", because as far as I can tell that only includes being A: enemies, B: neutral acquaintances, or C: in a relationship, and I'm pretty sure none of those fit into his advice, so no, he totally did say that. Maybe not "isolate them" but I really don't see how I implied that, either...
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on April 18, 2014, 05:22:50 PMWhile this is true, he didn't say that you had to for a year; specifically, he said "for like a year." TECHNICALITIES!
why you gotta be like that, BDS
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 05:37:07 PMWait what is "anything other than friendship", because as far as I can tell that only includes being A: enemies, B: neutral acquaintances, or C: in a relationship, and I'm pretty sure none of those fit into his advice, so no, he totally did say that. Maybe not "isolate them" but I really don't see how I implied that, either...
You specifically said "if there's a spark and you don't take advantage of it, it may die down before you have a chance to get to know somebody in a truly intimate manner," which, unless I am mistaken, is completely missing the point of what Psychic_Ness had to say.
Also, by "anything other than friendship," I meant "a spark," which is something you mentioned, and I was responding to.
Brainwash your crush into making them think they are madly in love with you. Problem solved.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on April 18, 2014, 06:18:19 PMcompletely missing the point
irony at its finest
so, let me clarify my own point.
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 05:09:17 PMgetting to know somebody outside of a relationship is completely different than getting to know them in a relationship
Still not clear? Lemme rephrase that.
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 05:09:17 PMgetting to know somebody outside of a relationship is completely different than getting to know them in a relationship truly intimate manner
Now, let me point out every paraphrase of "spark" that psychic_ness encouraged us to ignore.
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 03:13:59 PMIf you like someone I strongly suggest you be friends with them first for like a year and hold off any initial emotions you may have. Get to REALLYYYY know them or else you're going to be in for a massive, massive, massive, headache. At first, that feeling of having a crush on someone tends to overrule logical decision making. The infatuation period should go away after a while
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 06:30:43 PMNow, let me point out every paraphrase of "spark" that psychic_ness encouraged us to ignore.
The things is, he's not encouraging you to ignore the "spark" in the same manner you're thinking as it of. To word that more properly, he's thinking of something different than you are, but you're thinking of it in a completely different way and applying that to what he said. Of course, I can't speak for him, but I'm merely drawing conclusions from what he said.
But, may you recall that I also said this?
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on April 18, 2014, 05:22:50 PMThough, he did say to "hold off any initial emotions you may have," which I agree is quite extreme.
Now you see if you wanna get girls
The king's orders are absolute.
Exactly, BDS.
Initially when we like someone, we see everything they do through rose-tinted glasses. Let that phase die down so that you can make better choices. Before you say and feel things you don't really mean. For me personally, infatuation period lasts around 6 months. The less I interact with that person the longer it takes. You should be able to be friends with someone before dating them. I don't believe in relationships that exist only on the intimate level. There isn't much happiness in those from what I have seen.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 18, 2014, 03:31:50 PMYeah...you don't have much real world experience, do you?
If you want to torture yourself and risk infinite friendzoning, sure.
Unless you feel like having a nice afternoon with someone you're attracted to, sure.
Completely wrong, but sure.
Yes, because overthinking things make everything better, so sure.
Not true, but our society has developed the idea that requires men to initiate interaction and dating shit, while women are supposed to wait because if they took the role of "asking out" it could be seen as too forward or even creepy. But with women becoming more and more independent, these social stigmas are likely to change.
You obviously have yet to be introduced to the concept of "Risk and Reward".
Infinite friendzoning. So if the girl wants to friendzone you, don't waste your time considering her and trying to win her over. State your intentions, make sure she is clear about her decisions, then move on. Do you really want someone that doesn't want you? That should definitely be a factor in your feelings for someone, mutuality. It's very difficult for me to like a girl that has no interest in me and that plays out very well in terms of one-sided affection.
Back to the lunch and coffee thing. Unless you've established a reason for them to go with you I suggest not randomly inviting someone to lunch and coffee. Very rarely will a girl say yes to that offer unless she herself feels like taking a risk. Or unless you manage to ask her to lunch and coffee in the most amazing way that really leaves an impression on her.
You don't have to over-think a scenario that forces you to interact with her. You have to think, yes. If it's too difficult, then you probably don't have enough in common with her to be liking her anyway.
I would like to see the day that girls take initiative in asking guys out when they like them. Rather than just gossiping about the guy until word somehow finally reaches the guy and then the guy makes the move.
Is it society or evolution that has shaped this kind of thinking? It's funny that you bring that up because in nature, the guys tend to the ones courting the girls. I think this is because the females tend to be more selective about their partners because their sexual organs are a limited resource etc. There are theories you can read about. Makes sense.
Edit: So there were more posts while i was typing this. Yes I am saying ignore the spark. Ideally I would say "don't let it take control over your" but let's be realistic. The infatuation takes control over us even if we don't acknowledge it. So I'm saying. Whatever it is, give it time. If after x months/years of getting to know them it's still there, THEN there's something worth pursuing to you.
Yes this sounds like dating but dating is inefficient cuz the moment you are dating someone it's exclusive and you are limiting yourself to one person at a time. We put up subconscious barriers to close off other people from getting close to us cuz we already have a dating partner. "Ok , she is my friend so I shouldn't get too close to her cuz then my girlfriend will get jealous. Yeah I probably shouldn't invite her to see that movie alone cuz I shouldn't cuz I have a girlfriend already. But I do want to spend time alone with her." etc. It complicates scenarios that wouldn't need to be complicated. Get to know many people through friendship. Then choose the one that you feel closest to, to date.
@yugi
Don't worry about it and go for it. There was this one girl who I knew in elementary school from 1st to 5th grade. When middle school started we moved and did not see each other again until she popped up after I added a mutual friend of ours on facebook in freshman year of college. I sent her a message on facebook and she actually did not remember me... But we talked about stuff that happened in class and had a great conversation. We hit it off really well and now we're really great friends.
So for you, whether or not she remembers those first 6 months doesn't really matter.
Laughing too hard to keep arguing, I give up
See, all the women come to me, usually in groups of three and then we have all the sexytime.
I call it the Maestro Method of Engaging an Audience and Retaining Their Hearts
Quote from: MaestroUGC on April 18, 2014, 08:02:28 PMI call it the Maestro Method of Engaging an Audience and Retaining Their Hearts
MMEARTH
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 08:00:36 PMLaughing too hard to keep arguing, I give up
So the spark thing right? If your relationship solely relies on it, then it's not a very strong one. Enjoy it, but wait it out before taking the relationship a step further.
A year isn't a long time. And if you can't be friends with someone that long without losing interest in each other, then the chance of sustaining a much longer term and deeper relationship is much lower. Yes the only way of finding out whether you can be in a relationship with them is by actually being in a relationship with them. But the foundation of friendship should be there first and this foundation (your common interests, time spent with each other, etc.) will seem better than it actually is during the time when you're infatuated with one another.
A year isn't a long time, trust me. If you're not paying attention a single year can fly by faster than you can blink.
oh god it's 2015 now
Fuck it's 2016 I can't believe this
See, what did I tell you?
I was actually going to join in until I realized there's never going to be an end to this
And I'm actually having a bit of relationship troubles as well...but I don't want to say anything publicly because I have a nagging suspicion that he frequents the forums >.>
but see youre implying were having relationship troubles which is false
Quote from: Bubbles on April 18, 2014, 09:36:17 PMI was actually going to join in until I realized there's never going to be an end to this
That's why I decided to follow my gut reaction and laugh my ass off
Quote from: Psychic_Ness on April 18, 2014, 08:28:50 PMSo the spark thing right?
hahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAoh man, too funny
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 10:21:24 PMThat's why I decided to follow my gut reaction and laugh my ass off
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
oh man, too funny
Relax, dude. Clearly things have been working for you without trying what I said so whatever floats your boat.
What I've been describing based off of observation and experiences. Whenever a relationship is falling/ has fallen apart with a girl I used to be involved with, we actually discuss what happened, why it didn't work out, and how we could make future relationships better. The topics I posted were common themes in all my discussions which were generally agreed upon.
Dude, from what it sounds like, you're trying wayyyyyy too hard. Dating is pretty fucking simple when it boils down to it. Look sharp, be confident, you see a girl who has something that clicks, you talk to her and with the right mixture of timing and dumb luck, you might just get a date.
You should totally get to know someone a bit before moving forward with anything, but you can't be a cautious little ninny or else you'll miss your chance at getting what you actually want. An intimate relationship.
But oh no, what if it doesn't work out and she rejects me or we break up??? Well tough shit, at least you took a shot. So it wasn't meant to be, big deal. Go out there and try again.
You can't just spend your whole life testing the waters or you'll eventually be the only person left on the shore. Grow some balls and take the fucking plunge.
I'm loving this xD keep going!
Sorry, I was being pretty rude there, I'll admit. But yeah, what SFK said; it's kinda along the lines of "you miss every shot you don't take". To me, a relationship ending isn't the worst possible outcome. I really can never see myself predicting long term success of a relationship before actually getting to know what somebody's like in a relationship. It's just such a different state of mind, even (maybe especially) after the "honeymoon phase". A relationship ending just means we gave it a shot, and it didn't work. Every relationship you ever have is going to end, up until the very last one. That shouldn't be discouragement, it should be encouragement to keep actually putting yourself out there until you get to that last one. The only relationships I've ever regretted were, you know, early high school ones where I was just in it for the sake of having a girlfriend. Ever since I've grown out of that, even if a relationship ends on somewhat contentious terms (although I can't say that's really happened to me), I regret nothing. It's not time wasted, we still had fun, we still learned from it. I've been hurt more by my own inaction than I've ever been hurt by a breakup. If you and another person have mutual interest in one another, the grand majority of people will not be willing to wait that year with you, despite whatever awesome chemistry you might have had in a relationship, and will move on.
Quote from: Yugi on April 18, 2014, 06:58:56 PMNow you see if you wanna get girls
The king's orders are absolute.
Actually, negate everything I said. I just realized Yugi won this argument 2 pages ago.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 18, 2014, 11:15:16 PMDude, from what it sounds like, you're trying wayyyyyy too hard. Dating is pretty fucking simple when it boils down to it. Look sharp, be confident, you see a girl who has something that clicks, you talk to her and with the right mixture of timing and dumb luck, you might just get a date.
You should totally get to know someone a bit before moving forward with anything, but you can't be a cautious little ninny or else you'll miss your chance at getting what you actually want. An intimate relationship.
But oh no, what if it doesn't work out and she rejects me or we break up??? Well tough shit, at least you took a shot. So it wasn't meant to be, big deal. Go out there and try again.
You can't just spend your whole life testing the waters or you'll eventually be the only person left on the shore. Grow some balls and take the fucking plunge.
Well no what I'm describing doesn't require trying hard. It allows relationships to take a steady natural course with gradual increases. Successful relationships seem to be ones that bud slowly over time.
Dating is the same as testing the waters. So is the method I'm proposing. With what I proposed there are fewer social barriers and it allows you to get to know more people at the same time than dating one person. You get to spend as much time as you want with any of the individuals without underlying drama. This allows you to make a better and more informed decision at the end of the day compared to doing so much earlier in the relationship. This is opposed trying with everyone one at a time from the bottom up. Think parallel vs sequential processing.
Edit:
"I regret nothing. It's not time wasted, we still had fun, we still learned from it."
I agree that it's a learning experience and not time wasted. I feel that sometimes the pain associated can be avoided though and you still end up having the same outcome (you're not together and you both understand why).
My personal experience is that I have broken too many hearts and I hate it. I have let the infatuation take over me for a while and then when it's gone I realize I'm not interested anymore and I break her heart.
SFK, I'm not afraid of taking plunges and being rejected and all that stuff. I dislike hurting other people in the process.
Actually... I'm sort of with FierceDeity on this one...this is kind of hilarious
Psychic_Ness is a heart breaker, dream maker, lover taker
don't you mess around no, no, no
Ness is good at making conversations
Okay so argument after argument people go at it in this thread. How many of you have actually been a relationship that has lasted 6 months +. I am totally curious.
Your mother doesn't count.
Quote from: spitllama on April 19, 2014, 10:32:13 AMOkay so argument after argument people go at it in this thread. How many of you have actually been a relationship that has lasted 6 months +. I am totally curious.
Your mother doesn't count.
I'm in a relationship with everyone I know
Sluuuuuuuuttttttttt
Quote from: spitllama on April 19, 2014, 10:32:13 AMHow many of you have actually been a relationship that has lasted 6 months +. I am totally curious.
*raises hand*
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 19, 2014, 10:33:35 AMI'm in a relationship with everyone I know
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 19, 2014, 11:02:17 AMSluuuuuuuuttttttttt
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 19, 2014, 11:02:17 AMSluuuuuuuuttttttttt
He didn't specify which kind of relationship.
yeah, there's lots of different kinds of relationships.
though i can't think of any besides hate, love and indifference.
Quote from: spitllama on April 19, 2014, 10:32:13 AMHow many of you have actually been a relationship that has lasted 6 months +.
*raises hand*
*still has nothing useful to add*
Quote from: spitllama on April 19, 2014, 10:32:13 AMOkay so argument after argument people go at it in this thread. How many of you have actually been a relationship that has lasted 6 months +. I am totally curious.
does it count if i used time dilation
I'm slain
Does my relationship with Microsoft Excel count
Quote from: Mashi on April 19, 2014, 06:28:28 PMdoes it count if i used time dilation
Yes :D
Maybe we should change gears for a bit and talk about functional relationships, then go from there xD
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 18, 2014, 01:09:59 PMstuff
So, quick update on this situation, without all of the boring details.
1. We're dating now
2. She's even more amazing than I thought
3. Life is good
4. her roommates need to learn to knock
FierceDeity is gettin' it on. I suggest a sock on the door bro.
I have to admit I only skimmed all that arguing but I do agree that Yugi won it with the Persona video.
I do agree that relationships/dating can be pretty simple when it comes down to it.
My strategy for relationships is making each other happy and just fucking giving a fuck about each other. I've been with Dan for over a year now and I think we're doing pretty fucking awesome and we only knew each other for like... 3 days before he asked me out.
Let's all just be happy, k? K. :D
Also, very happy for you FierceDeity!
Well now I guess I have to go to yet another prom with yet another girl.
This is going to be expensive...
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 23, 2014, 10:16:35 PM4. her roommates need to learn to knock
Quote from: ETFROXX on April 23, 2014, 10:50:12 PMFierceDeity is gettin' it on. I suggest a sock on the door bro.
NSM IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE MUSLIM TERRORIST HEAVEN. FULL OF VIRGINS.
COME ON YOU GUYS, QUIT RUINING THIS PLACE WITH YOUR PERFECT GENES AND IMPECCABLE SEXUAL CHARMS. FOR SHAME!
Quote from: ETFROXX on April 23, 2014, 10:50:12 PMFierceDeity is gettin' it on. I suggest a sock on the door bro.
...
Also, very happy for you FierceDeity!
I'll have to keep that in mind next time, haha.
And thank you :D
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 24, 2014, 08:03:15 AMNSM IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE MUSLIM TERRORIST HEAVEN. FULL OF VIRGINS.
COME ON YOU GUYS, QUIT RUINING THIS PLACE WITH YOUR PERFECT GENES AND IMPECCABLE SEXUAL CHARMS. FOR SHAME!
Can't believe you excluded nocturne from that, he's clearly rolling in bitches right now
Nocturne is 10/10 would bang
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 24, 2014, 08:03:15 AMNSM IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE MUSLIM TERRORIST HEAVEN. FULL OF VIRGINS.
COME ON YOU GUYS, QUIT RUINING THIS PLACE WITH YOUR PERFECT GENES AND IMPECCABLE SEXUAL CHARMS. FOR SHAME!
I can't turn this shit off, SFK.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 24, 2014, 09:43:14 AMNocturne is 10/10 would bang
eh i'd give him a low 8, personally.
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 24, 2014, 09:37:47 AMCan't believe you excluded nocturne from that, he's clearly rolling in bitches right now
Because anything about being sexy is OBVIOUSLY directed at at Nocturne, duh.
What is even going on
Why don't you tell us, mr. multi-prom
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 24, 2014, 01:36:26 PMWhy don't you tell us, mr. multi-prom
Well you all know about the first one
the second one is at MY school and it's with the girl I mentioned way earlier... So I feel like it might be a little bit awkward. The whole idea was my mom's, not mine. Taking your friends to prom just seems weird >.>
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 23, 2014, 10:16:35 PMSo, quick update on this situation, without all of the boring details.
1. We're dating now
2. She's even more amazing than I thought
3. Life is good
4. her roommates need to learn to knock
Heyyyy TMI D:
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on April 24, 2014, 08:03:15 AMNSM IS SUPPOSED TO BE LIKE MUSLIM TERRORIST HEAVEN. FULL OF VIRGINS.
COME ON YOU GUYS, QUIT RUINING THIS PLACE WITH YOUR PERFECT GENES AND IMPECCABLE SEXUAL CHARMS. FOR SHAME!
Lol but we're none of us perfect :P Also I can't say much about myself in this thread for a good reason but I can always try to be unhelpful. I actually don't have that much experience in dating, I'm just older than you guys so I can tell you stuff you're doing wrong.
One thing I can comment on is that I really like guys that are interesting to talk to and that I can learn stuff from. So I guess that means guys need to offer more than cuteness, cuddliness, good looks, love, money...hahaha XD
I miss being sexually provocative on here...granted, my love life is going nowhere.
That girl I made out with this past summer will be going to the conference again this year, so if I'm lucky, I might be able to hook up with her again...well, not "hook up," per-say, but...yeah...
There are several girls here that I would love to date, but being a senior makes it practically impossible. Practically as in, attempting it would be useless, because I'm leaving for college in the fall, so why bother getting into a new relationship with someone back home, when I'm going to be living the next four plus years somewhere else? My emotions are all over the place at the moment, but my heart has latched onto a few girls that I know I'm going to miss when I leave.
Does anyone have some suggestions? I was thinking of just talking to them about it near the end of school, but what good would that really do? I'd just let them know that I am attracted to them, or I have feelings for them, but what would the point be? I don't know. Any advice, peeps?
Better to love and lose than never to have loved at all. Of course you could always just say "nah" and wait for college. Though the odds of meeting people in college is, like, zero.
Kman, think of it this way: if things go awry, you may never be obligated to see those people ever again. If they go well, the people should understand the fact that you're leaving, like, really soon, and they probably shouldn't expect anything long-term. Just be open about your intentions, whatever they are, and if you fail, you get a fresh start in a couple months :P
Quote from: MaestroUGC on April 24, 2014, 06:55:00 PMThough the odds of meeting people in college is, like, zero.
It took me a few seconds to realize who was saying this hahahahahaha
Advice: go homo or go home
I did once, but most men can't handle 100% unfiltered Maestro.
Most women can't either, but they have the boobs so I try to make more of an effort.
Maestro filters: the #1 selling sex-related product in the continental US
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 24, 2014, 07:19:49 PMAdvice: go homo or go home
Well, I'm already at home, so....
Quote from: MaestroUGC on April 24, 2014, 06:55:00 PMBetter to love and lose than never to have loved at all. Of course you could always just say "nah" and wait for college. Though the odds of meeting people in college is, like, zero.
Oh, I have definitely loved and lost. I won't lie, I did kind of expect to meet a girl in college, but of course, it's always a gamble.
Quote from: FierceDeity on April 24, 2014, 07:08:54 PMKman, think of it this way: if things go awry, you may never be obligated to see those people ever again. If they go well, the people should understand the fact that you're leaving, like, really soon, and they probably shouldn't expect anything long-term. Just be open about your intentions, whatever they are, and if you fail, you get a fresh start in a couple months :P
The thing is, Fierce, that while I had my little moment last summer where I made out with a total stranger, I can't date someone without the honest intention of wanting to see it go further. That's what dating is for me; I'm not saying I intend to marry the girl(s) I date, but instead to get an idea of what I want from a relationship. And that's the thing. these girls aren't girls I could just date for a few months and then leave at the drop of a hat. I want to give them an honest chance. I thought that way about the girl I had a crush on in November. We made out a couple of times, and had a bit of a fling going on for several weeks, but I ended it abruptly because I knew it wouldn't end well. Granted, we're polar opposites morally, and 87% of the time we can't stand each other's presence, so its a wonder how we became attracted to one another in the first place.
I just don't know what to do about those other girls who I'll never get a chance to be with.
EDIT: Ninja'd.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on April 24, 2014, 07:27:06 PMmost men can't handle 100% unfiltered Maestro.
Use a condom.
Use the whole box.
Quote from: Kman96 on April 24, 2014, 07:55:36 PMOh, I have definitely loved and lost. I won't lie, I did kind of expect to meet a girl in college, but of course, it's always a gamble.
Trust me. If there's a time where you're likely to meet someone, it's college. You'll be surprised at how much more you connect with your friends/relationships at college than in high school, because there are (typically) so many more people to "choose" from. In my experience, at least, I thought of some people as my friends and as potential love interests because I spent so much time with them on a daily basis, and so it was really familiarity over everything. But now that I'm almost entirely in control of who I spend my time with, I realize how immature or incompatible a lot of the people I used to spend time with are. It's much less of a "gamble" than in high school, because a lot more people are looking, and there aren't all those pubescent hormones and underdeveloped frontal lobes (or whatever) getting in the way.
Quote from: Kman96 on April 24, 2014, 07:55:36 PMThe thing is, Fierce, that while I had my little moment last summer where I made out with a total stranger, I can't date someone without the honest intention of wanting to see it go further. That's what dating is for me; I'm not saying I intend to marry the girl(s) I date, but instead to get an idea of what I want from a relationship.
No yeah, I totally understand you. I'm the same way. I was just saying to be honest about your intentions, whatever they are. You'd be surprised at how satisfying (and no I don't mean
that kind of satisfying) a relationship can be even if you know it has to end soon. There was this girl at the camp I went to this summer who I only met during my second week of our two-week stay, but we may as well have been "dating". It's not like I only enjoyed it for the physical aspect of the relationship, I truly enjoyed spending that time with her, even though after camp she went back to
Brazil, and I may never see her again (though she
might be going to college in my area next year, but I didn't know that at the time, haha). The point is, it can still be an emotionally fulfilling experience.
I definitely wouldn't recommend starting anything with somebody if they'd want a long distance relationship throughout the year, because I have honestly yet to see such a relationship not die out (in a blaze of hurt feelings) within the first year. But, if you're truly interested in them, I see nothing wrong with an arrangement like "If we get back over break and neither of us is still seeing somebody, pick it back up", if you were both okay with it (and I do know people who've had this arrangement work). Really, my advice boils down to this: do whatever you want as long as you're respecting the other person's wishes (and would ultimately be okay with it yourself), and whatever happens happens.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 24, 2014, 07:19:49 PMAdvice: go homo or go home yo
somewhat fixed but it kinda sounds lame
I tired
got tinder
matched up with 2 people.
what do i do now ????
My heart is racing so hard right now i can't do this
Quote from: Dude on May 04, 2014, 04:41:15 AMgot tinder
matched up with 2 people.
what do i do now ????
My heart is racing so hard right now i can't do this
Yes you can, you silly. They're probably just as nervous as you.
BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY AND ETF'S SELF HELP BOOK ISN'T HELPING
OK, calm the fuck down. It's not the end of the world. You're being silly.
Just treat like any other conversation. Relax and let them speak. A conversation is a two way street. There's equal pressure on both parties to be involved and you shouldn't be too involved. Ask them about themselves; if they're like any other human whoever lived, they'll think the sun shines right out of they're arse and will love to tell you about themselves; if they turn out to be reserved, well evidently they're just as nervous as you and don't want to smother you.
Just remember that you are fucking awesome and you are capable of fantastic things, least of all a date.
The great thing about tinder is that there's already knowledge of mutual interest. You don't have to think so hard; they right swiped you for a reason. You can always start by commenting on something you like about their profile; maybe you have a really cool shared interest; maybe they're doing something interesting in one/more of their pictures; maybe they're just really fucking attractive. Whatever it is, you don't have to be afraid to compliment them on it, because you already know that they're interested in you, so as long as you don't compliment them on something really strange ("I LOVE YOUR EARLOBES"), they're bound to be flattered.
As for what you actually want to get out of tinder, all I can say is that, by the end of the first date with anyone, be honest about what you want it to be. Tinder is overwhelmingly used as a hook-up app, but if that's not what you're looking for, there are still a lot of people who actually end up in a relationship (see: me and my girlfriend); you just have to keep matching, keep trying, and look for the right person. Or, if you're like me, go on tinder for shits and giggles (and/or ego boost), not really expecting to use it seriously, and be completely surprised by how amazing one match ends up being.
But seriously, tinder is one of the few situations in which you really don't have to worry, like, at all. Stay calm, message them, and if it doesn't work out, oh well; just keep getting new matches until it does. You have nothing to lose.
Quote from: Dude on May 04, 2014, 06:15:57 AMBUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO SAY AND ETF'S SELF HELP BOOK ISN'T HELPING
WHAT. D:
sorry i keep getting busy and don't continue it that oftenMAYBE AFTER SCHOOLS OUT AND I MOVE I'LL POST THE NEXT CHAPTER. HOPEFULLY.
Listen up guys (and I guess girls too, but I can't speak from experience): all you need is to be able to play smooth jazz on a brass instrument and you can have any woman you want but still keep the spit thing a secret ok
Shit, no wonder I get all the ladies. Jazz trombone 4 lyfe
Also, it's not spit, it's condensation in your breath, damnit!
same thing: gross
Well, I play an extremely large, sexy saxophone that's more metal than wood... I see no women. XD
@Bubbles: I saw someone drink it out of their Trombone valve before. :P
Jazz trumpet is best, this is fact.
Quote from: ETFROXX on May 04, 2014, 05:49:21 PMMAYBE AFTER SCHOOLS OUT AND I MOVE I'LL POST THE NEXT CHAPTER. HOPEFULLY.
BWAHAHA that's never happening. COME ON, PROVE ME WRONG.
Quote from: fingerz on May 14, 2014, 08:29:28 PM@Nebbles: I saw someone drink it out of their Trombone valve before. :P
WTF whyyyy did you say that xD That was the most scarring thing I remember from music class as a kid xD
Quote from: Bubbles on May 14, 2014, 08:07:51 PMListen up guys (and I guess girls too, but I can't speak from experience): all you need is to be able to play smooth jazz on a brass instrument and you can have any woman you want but still keep the spit thing a secret ok
I guess I can say that women should get a STEM degree and at least one guy from your class or in that field will awkwardly ask you out within a few years. Meanwhile don't brush your hair on a daily basis and wear only dress shirts, jeans and sneakers. No hoodies. Ignore him the first few times to seem cooler than you actually are.
Ohhhh you're saying that your constant unkempt state is of a strategic nature, and not laziness huh....
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on May 14, 2014, 08:55:18 PMOhhhh you're saying that your constant unkempt state is of a strategic nature, and not laziness huh....
D;
It makes me look more hard working during the weekdays! The weekends...yeah it's laziness.
I'd punish you with a pixie cut if I didn't hate it so much! XD
DOEEEEEEEEET. Pixie cuts are teh best.
But what will I forget to brush everyday? D:
Your teeth, of course! Gum disease will detract all males who aren't truly serious about courting you.
Or you could do a Link hairstyle like your little felt thing in your picture :P
Aaaaaandddddd this is the reason I don't have a tinder imgur.com/gallery/cinvE
...because somebody who was clearly on tinder for the wrong reasons was the catalyst for a mild shitstorm?
EDIT: lol didn't read the whole thing. Clearly at least a level 7 shitstorm. Still, neither of them are even close to the typical person on tinder. Aside from being batshit crazy, that girl was outside of the norm in that she actually wanted a steady relationship. And the guy's just an idiot for being on a DATING app to find friends, despite having a girlfriend. Hell, I deleted the app after meeting my girlfriend (though that was half to stop people from continuously matching with/messaging me long after I'd stopped)
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 15, 2014, 05:16:53 AMOr you could do a Link hairstyle like your little felt thing in your picture :P
Heyyy that little felt thing is the best plush Linky anyone can ask for. When you see his round body, corn ears, mitten hands and that perfect little sewn on smile, you'll know.
uh
if you were talking with someone and they forgot your birthday how upset would you be
I never expect people to even know my birthday excepting my immediate family.
I go to great lengths to not even celebrate my birthday, I never tell anyone my birthday nor make that info available so I don't think it's a big deal. I don't make a fuss about it when it comes up.
I wouldn't know any of my friends' birthdays if Facebook didn't remind me. Even then, I still forget. Frequently.
I mean I'm one of those people who has a ridiculously good memory for certain things so I never forget names or birthdays. But others do all the time.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 06, 2014, 04:48:09 AMI mean I'm one of those people who has a ridiculously good memory for certain things so I never forget names or birthdays. But others do all the time.
yeah, same here. I remember random birthdays and phone numbers without trying, but I can never seem to remember where I put my driving license.
Other people don't seem to, however.
If you've known this person for a long time and you'd expect them to know it's your birthday, maybe you should care . But I'm with these guys, in that other people have to remind ME it's my birthday because I care so little.
Nope, I often forget my own birthday anyway.
I struggle to remember birthdays, usually. Not because I don't care, but because it's difficult for me to have the prudence to remember one particular day in the year. I leave myself notes about people's birthdays too sometimes, but even then, I forget, since I completely forget about the note until the person's next birthday. It makes me feel guilty sometimes, to be honest!
I don't celebrate my birthday beyond maybe buying some ice cream, so I don't mind it when people don't remember my birthday.
eh, I guess I'm ok then. I was just a little worried because I'd be a little upset, plus I actually asked him when his birthday was heh...but that was like 5 months ago and I don't even know if he remembers
I'd only be concerned if it's someone your really close to, and even then, some people are just plain forgetful.
So speaking of relationships, I'm kinda actually in one. Which is really fucking weird, because it's literally been years since I've been in an actual relationship. Probably gonna fuck this up really fast. Hope not, because I've never been with anyone who I can make out with while doing Lemon Grab impressions and then call senpai in a japanese schoolgirl voice. That's something you don't find every day.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on August 06, 2014, 10:35:19 PMI've never been with anyone who I can make out with while doing Lemon Grab impressions and then call senpai in a japanese schoolgirl voice. That's something you don't find every day.
On the one hand, some might consider this TMI, but on the other hand, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
That's awesome, I'm happy for ya, SFK. I'm sure you'll do fine.
wat/10
Literally every guy I've ever had the tiniest crush on in my school (except for like, 2) (there's a lot) and the guy who likes me are all in one class with me
How am I supposed to breathe LEARN?
/middleschoolproblems
Seduce them all and have them do the book learnin' for you.
^^^Use that feminine charm to slack your way through the class.
Put back up my OkCupid account for shits and giggles. My ex popped up with like an 85% match. Considering we had absolutely no chemistry from the get-go, I'd say their whole match system is BS.
can someone please explain the thoughts of a shy guy
because im completely lost and im wondering if its even worth getting stressed over anymore
and no wise guys i know shy guy is a nintendo character
The thoughts of a shy guy:
"Wow, that girl is really pretty. Maybe I should go talk to her. No, I'll look like an idiot. But she's so-oh crap, she's coming this way. Shit shit shit, she just sat down next to you. Say something, you moron. Do it. For god sake! Crap, you waited too long, now if you say something, it's gonna be awkward! You missed the window fuck head!"
Girl:"Ummm, hi"
Shy guy: "Hi."
Thoughts: "Hi? That's all you could muster up, you couldn't at least go for small talk or something? Just die, right now."
True story. Seriously, the best way to deal with a shy person is to force them to talk. Usually they want to but just can't figure out how to start.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 12:25:43 PMThe thoughts of a shy guy:
"Wow, that girl is really pretty. Maybe I should go talk to her. No, I'll look like an idiot. But she's so-oh crap, she's coming this way. Shit shit shit, she just sat down next to you. Say something, you moron. Do it. For god sake! Crap, you waited too long, now if you say something, it's gonna be awkward! You missed the window fuck head!"
Girl:"Ummm, hi"
Shy guy: "Hi."
Thoughts: "Hi? That's all you could muster up, you couldn't at least go for small talk or something? Just die, right now."
True story. Seriously, the best way to deal with a shy person is to force them to talk. Usually they want to but just can't figure out how to start.
Yeah, not bad. Also start off with easy questions and make sure you look interested in what they say otherwise they'll think you don't care.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 12:25:43 PMThe thoughts of a shy guy:
"Wow, that girl is really pretty. Maybe I should go talk to her. No, I'll look like an idiot. But she's so-oh crap, she's coming this way. Shit shit shit, she just sat down next to you. Say something, you moron. Do it. For god sake! Crap, you waited too long, now if you say something, it's gonna be awkward! You missed the window fuck head!"
Girl:"Ummm, hi"
Shy guy: "Hi."
Thoughts: "Hi? That's all you could muster up, you couldn't at least go for small talk or something? Just die, right now."
True story. Seriously, the best way to deal with a shy person is to force them to talk. Usually they want to but just can't figure out how to start.
lol this is literally me on a daily basis with all people
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 12:25:43 PMThe thoughts of a shy guy:
"Wow, that girl is really pretty. Maybe I should go talk to her. No, I'll look like an idiot. But she's so-oh crap, she's coming this way. Shit shit shit, she just sat down next to you. Say something, you moron. Do it. For god sake! Crap, you waited too long, now if you say something, it's gonna be awkward! You missed the window fuck head!"
Girl:"Ummm, hi"
Shy guy: "Hi."
Thoughts: "Hi? That's all you could muster up, you couldn't at least go for small talk or something? Just die, right now."
True story. Seriously, the best way to deal with a person is to force them to talk. Usually they want to but just can't figure out how to start.
This is incredibly accurate and quote of the year.
Shy guys are the worst tho even if they have a conception that they're quiet and shy and a nice person we're all incredibly self centered and whiny so I'd advise against being interested in one xoxo bye
Shy people have the tendency to become more open when they start to feel comfortable around someone tho
A couple years back I was incredibly shy and lacked self-confidence. Things have gone to the other direction since then B)
Yeah, I'm basically on the same page. Went from being a introverted outcast in high school to, well, what I am now. Shy guys are usually just people out of their element, and that element just usually happens to be talking to women(or people in general).
is it wrong if I thought we were talking about shy guys from mario
It is because that means you didn't read bubbles's post which explicitly states she's not talking about that shy guy
Does this make Yugi the wise guy?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 01, 2014, 12:36:48 PMShy guys are the worst tho even if they have a conception that they're quiet and shy and a nice person we're all incredibly self centered and whiny so I'd advise against being interested in one xoxo bye
People who are actually shy are quiet either because they're uncomfortable around people they aren't familiar with or because they don't want to be a bother to other people. Self-centered or whiny people who are quiet aren't shy, they're just bored with what they're doing and/or too conceited to converse with people around them at the time. At least in a sentence. The world's personalities are not composed only of different types of vanity.
Quote from: Zunawe on October 01, 2014, 03:09:33 PMThe world's personalities are not composed only of different types of vanity.
This is where you lost me. And make no mistake, most shy people are incredibly self centered and whiny. You don't need to like yourself to care about yourself, and certainly not to feel sorry for yourself.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 12:25:43 PMTrue story. Seriously, the best way to deal with a shy person is to force them to talk. Usually they want to but just can't figure out how to start.
I spent a very large chunk of time with this guy one-on-one where I continuously brought up subjects and today he still can't look me in the eye. My problem is that I don't have an opinion on whether I'm into him yet but he sure isn't helping himself and I'm just trying to be understanding.
Slow I kinda see where you're coming from. Basically, shy people are shy because they are uncomfortable in their day to day situation and are very conscious of making a mistake and embarrassing themselves (speaking from experience). The idea is that even if they want to help others, they are still too caught up in what others think of them and are therefore somewhat self centered.
And honestly I don't think a shy guy is right for me because I'm fairly quiet myself, but hey I have to give chances. I just feel like in this situation I'm the one trying harder and its reallyyy weighing me down
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 01, 2014, 12:36:48 PMShy guys are the worst tho even if they have a conception that they're quiet and shy and a nice person we're all incredibly self centered and whiny so I'd advise against being interested in one xoxo bye
Spoiler
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg3.wikia.nocookie.net%2F__cb20130812182200%2Fepicrapbattlesofhistory%2Fimages%2F3%2F3a%2FFunny-gif-hahaha-no-transformers.gif&hash=94cc0a0827f7d31f89d6c44249025c4d6c1f2b07)
Zunawe already summed it up quite nicely.
Quote from: Bubbles on October 01, 2014, 03:32:15 PMSlow I kinda see where you're coming from. Basically, shy people are shy because they are uncomfortable in their day to day situation and are very conscious of making a mistake and embarrassing themselves (speaking from experience). The idea is that even if they want to help others, they are still too caught up in what others think of them and are therefore somewhat self centered.
Being "conscious of making a mistake and embarrassing themselves" is only one reason for being shy. As Zunawe said, many people who are shy because they're not comfortable around unfamiliar people, which isn't really being self-centered at all (being self-centered in this case, I would think, would mean ignoring other people because you place yourself on such a high pedestal).
But what makes you uncomfortable though? I always stayed quiet so I could better understand a new person when I was talking to them but even that can be tied to not wanting to say the wrong thing
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on October 01, 2014, 03:38:42 PMSpoiler
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg3.wikia.nocookie.net%2F__cb20130812182200%2Fepicrapbattlesofhistory%2Fimages%2F3%2F3a%2FFunny-gif-hahaha-no-transformers.gif&hash=94cc0a0827f7d31f89d6c44249025c4d6c1f2b07)
idk what you're laughing at, because I said "we" since I was referring to myself as well???
Yeah bubbles got what I was trying to say. Sort of, anyway.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 01, 2014, 12:36:48 PMShy guys are the worst tho even if they have a conception that they're quiet and shy and a nice person we're all incredibly self centered and whiny so I'd advise against being interested in one xoxo bye
I can't really tell what you're saying because of the lack of punctuation in this post.
cute
Are you trying to offend me? ^_^;
Shy guys? Yep, that's me. :P
i think slows definition fits mael more than it does any other shy person in the world, haha
But not all shy people are awful, OK?
Quote from: Dude on October 01, 2014, 04:37:53 PMi think slows definition fits mael more than it does any other shy person in the world, haha
But not all shy people are awful, OK?
I'm not even sure what slow said.....
And I'd say most shy people are different online.... :P
Quote from: Dude on October 01, 2014, 04:37:53 PMi think slows definition fits mael more than it does any other shy person in the world, haha
But not all shy people are awful, OK?
All people are awful though, no? And mael in ways who we are online is more real than who we are outside the Internet tbh ;o
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 01, 2014, 06:17:46 PMAll people are awful though, no?
This is what that last part was addressing. I think this kind of view on people is cynical (and, on a more personal level, wrong).
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 01, 2014, 03:18:46 PMThis is where you lost me. And make no mistake, most shy people are incredibly self centered and whiny. You don't need to like yourself to care about yourself, and certainly not to feel sorry for yourself.
As much as I hate to say it, slow is right. Shy people generally don't want to be shy, so when they're alone all the time, the only thing on their mind is how terrible and lonely their life is. Of course, there are situations where people actually don't want to socialize, in which case, while they won't be whiny, they're self centered as all hell to think that they're better than/don't need other people.
I think this is rubbing off the wrong way though. Introverted people aren't bad people, they're just stuck in a cyclical cynical mind set.
Quote from: FireArrow on October 01, 2014, 06:51:55 PMAs much as I hate to say it, slow is right. Shy people generally don't want to be shy, so when they're alone all the time, the only thing on their mind is how terrible and lonely their life is. Of course, there are situations where people actually don't want to socialize, in which case, while they won't be whiny, they're self centered as all hell to think that they're better than/don't need other people.
I think this is rubbing off the wrong way though. Introverted people aren't bad people, they're just stuck in a cyclical cynical mind set.
That is a very extreme generalization.
because all introverts have identical personalities
Maybe YOU fellas have this opinion of yourselves, but I actually agree with BDS for a change, in that you're making really broad generalizations a personality trait that covers a HUGE scope.
But what can I expect from a bunch of stuck up, self-centered, cynical, SHY people. <sarcasm btw
This is almost a derail but it's still on topic.
Bubbles' question is answered guys, let's go home.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 07:33:30 PMbecause all introverts have identical personalities
Maybe YOU fellas have this opinion of yourselves, but I actually agree with BDS for a change, in that you're making really broad generalizations a personality trait that covers a HUGE scope.
But what can I expect from a bunch of stuck up, self-centered, cynical, SHY people. <sarcasm btw
Ily
Be careful not to confuse an introvert for being shy. You can have shy extroverts too, people who do very well in social situations but aren't good with new people/things. Whereas typical introverts do very well one-on-one/small groups and in areas they have interests in.
Also, no, not all shy/introverted/quiet people are self-centered. It's just to which degree they get excited about certain subjects. I guarantee you if you were to approach this guy about something he really enjoys (hobbies, sports, area of study, himself) he'll probably perk up if he's just introverted.
If not then you might intimidate or otherwise make him uncomfortable for whatever reason.
Long story short, don't force him out of his bubble, he'll come out when he's ready.
Replace the word "shy" with the word "loner." I don't think we're talking about the same thing. People who are simply not comfortable in unfamiliar situations is not what I'm getting at. I'll agree, My use of the word introvert was probably inappropriate, as it really doesn't pertain to what I'm talking about.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on October 01, 2014, 08:09:01 PMLong story short, don't force him out of his bubble, he'll come out when he's ready.
Sorry for the double post, but this is not the way to handle it. Doing this will only make him think you're not interested. I can't remember who, but someone already hit the bulls-eye.
He WANTS to talk to you, he's just afraid to. Your positive social ques will fly right over his head, and any negative ones he's gonna misinterpret and take to heart. So approach him in a way that doesn't give him the chance to misunderstand your intentions.
Quote from: FireArrow on October 01, 2014, 08:29:57 PMSorry for the double post, but this is not the way to handle it. Doing this will only make him think you're not interested. I can't remember who, but someone already hit the bulls-eye.
It was probably SFK
He's got this down to heart, apparently
Yeah, I was mostly posting for the group in general, not just you Fire. I can't say I deal with any introverted/shy people aside from myself on a daily basis, so i'm not a real authority on the issue.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on October 01, 2014, 08:33:38 PMI can't say I deal with any introverted/shy people aside from myself
I find this funny
It just makes sense
Quote from: MaestroUGC on October 01, 2014, 08:33:38 PMYeah, I was mostly posting for the group in general, not just you Fire. I can't say I deal with any introverted/shy people aside from myself on a daily basis, so i'm not a real authority on the issue.
Well, most of my blabbering comes from experience as a person with aspergers syndrome, so it's pretty frivolous for me to assume that it would apply to other people. You're probably just as qualified (if not a thousand times more cuz Maestro wisdom) as I am. :3
I do have to say though, the guy in bubbles situation is literally me. That's pretty much what I do every time I try to make friends/have a crush on someone. The whole "why doesn't he talk to me even though I've already established myself on talking terms with him" comes from a blurring and misunderstanding of social thresholds.
See, I just step all over the social norms cause I don't have time to wait on people's courtesies.
Where else would new trends come from?
Quote from: FireArrow on October 01, 2014, 08:29:57 PMSorry for the double post, but this is not the way to handle it. Doing this will only make him think you're not interested. I can't remember who, but someone already hit the bulls-eye.
As of right now though, I'm
not interested. The only reason I'm still worrying about this is because I feel like I need to give him more time to do something because of the whole shyness thing. The problem is idk when enough time is enough (as it's been over half a year now...)
If you don't do anything, he wont do anything. He isn't ever going to brave through his shyness, because it's more than just shyness (if it was just shyness, he would at least be talking to you by now.) I hope that answers your quesiton.
I'm not quite sure I understand what your saying though. What are you doing now that you would stop doing when your done giving him more time?
It sort of sounds like you're just sitting there expecting somebody that has no intentions of doing anything to do something and clearly that is not something that is likely to result in progress in any direction.
You can either make it something you try super hard at (seeeeeeems not worth considering your ambivalent feelings towards the individual anyway), or just say w/e and if mr shy suddenly springs to action when he sees you not trying so hard that could be a neat, though unlikely, bonus.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on October 01, 2014, 11:16:06 PMIt sort of sounds like you're just sitting there expecting somebody that has no intentions of doing anything to do something and clearly that is not something that is likely to result in progress in any direction.
You can either make it something you try super hard at (seeeeeeems not worth considering your ambivalent feelings towards the individual anyway), or just say w/e and if mr shy suddenly springs to action when he sees you not trying so hard that could be a neat, though unlikely, bonus.
Heyyyyy when did you start giving good advice on these kind of things? xD
I was just thinking that, but regardless it's good advice!
Quote from: FireArrow on October 01, 2014, 09:41:31 PMIf you don't do anything, he wont do anything. He isn't ever going to brave through his shyness, because it's more than just shyness (if it was just shyness, he would at least be talking to you by now.) I hope that answers your quesiton.
I'm not quite sure I understand what your saying though. What are you doing now that you would stop doing when your done giving him more time?
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on October 01, 2014, 11:16:06 PMIt sort of sounds like you're just sitting there expecting somebody that has no intentions of doing anything to do something and clearly that is not something that is likely to result in progress in any direction.
You can either make it something you try super hard at (seeeeeeems not worth considering your ambivalent feelings towards the individual anyway), or just say w/e and if mr shy suddenly springs to action when he sees you not trying so hard that could be a neat, though unlikely, bonus.
Probably should have clarified this, but he has done something before. He asked me to what I call mini-prom and caught me completely off guard, considering I literally never talked to him before that ever. Basically I'm just worried that he's going to surprise me with something again because apparently that's how he works. Meanwhile every day I'm on high alert and feel guilty whenever I think about anyone else because he's always in the back of my mind
Quote from: Bubbles on October 02, 2014, 07:23:04 AMProbably should have clarified this, but he has done something before. He asked me to what I call mini-prom and caught me completely off guard, considering I literally never talked to him before that ever. Basically I'm just worried that he's going to surprise me with something again because apparently that's how he works. Meanwhile every day I'm on high alert and feel guilty whenever I think about anyone else because he's always in the back of my mind
#girl problems
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on October 01, 2014, 07:33:30 PMI actually agree with BDS for a change
Same
Quote from: Bubbles on October 02, 2014, 07:23:04 AMProbably should have clarified this, but he has done something before. He asked me to what I call mini-prom and caught me completely off guard, considering I literally never talked to him before that ever. Basically I'm just worried that he's going to surprise me with something again because apparently that's how he works. Meanwhile every day I'm on high alert and feel guilty whenever I think about anyone else because he's always in the back of my mind
Keep in mind, you are by no means obligated to entertain his affection. It seems like either deep down, some part of you is interested in him as well, or you're just being wayyy too nice about it. If it's the first one, feel free to try more actively; even on the offchance that he isn't interested, no guy like this is going to be upset that you're coming onto them. If it's the second one (which seems most likely), stop worrying about what he's going to do, or whether you're giving him enough of a chance; the fact that you're thinking about it this much implies that you definitely are. If he decides to try more, great; see where that leads, and if you're not feeling it, just let him down easy. You really shouldn't have to pursue something you're not interested in for the other person's lack of effort/social skills. Shyness certainly doesn't imply that one is self-centered, but it's also not something anybody else is obligated to compensate for.
In other news, I haven't posted in this thread in a while:
I broke up with my girlfriend about a week after getting back to school; I really wasn't getting what I wanted out of the relationship, our communication over the summer had given me time to notice some irreconcilable differences, and considering these things, I didn't want to drag the relationship out for a slow death. I felt like shit afterwards, mostly because this is the first time I've broken up with somebody who had no idea it was coming, but also because I kept second guessing myself. But now I'm happy about the decision, and those differences are, reassuringly, even more blaring than before. I'm still happy we dated, because we had some good memories together, and I really never would've discovered these differences by waiting longer before dating, anyways. All in all, no rant involved here, just a good ol' summary.
Since then, though:
Do asian girls tend to have a thing for nerdy white guys, or something? Because I seem to have unintentionally acquired a harem, and I am totally unfamiliar with this situation.
Quote from: FierceDeity on October 02, 2014, 10:10:43 AMDo asian girls tend to have a thing for nerdy white guys, or something? Because I seem to have unintentionally acquired a harem, and I am totally unfamiliar with this situation.
A+ word choice
If international student, high probability of looking for dat citizenship marriage.
Otherwise idk, maybe you're just a reasonable person and they enjoy your company and it isn't just because 'asian girl' since there is far more to that identifier than a single generalized persona :P
Majority of my friends are asian, and probably majority of that are female, but idk it just kind of happens I cant explain it
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on October 02, 2014, 01:36:59 PMIf international student, high probability of looking for dat citizenship marriage.
Yup. It's not like Asian girls just decide "hey I'm going to marry a white guy" when there are tons of Asian single guys around.
It could also be a status thing...don't think I can really explain it without sounding offensive. But usually the first thing I get asked from other Asians is, "Is he rich?" Now if you're as offensive as my sister, she considers it as a form of settling. Basically the Asian guys would only date the *hot* Asian girls.
On an unrelated topic, I keep getting proposed to in my dreams ._.
Most of the Asians I've talked to seem really proud of their race and would never date outside of it. Considering 90% of my friend are Asian, I actually find this really annoying. >_>
EDIT: With the exception of people who were raised outside of the U.S., they seem to care less for some reason.
Hahaha are they mostly Korean? (I knew this Chinese guy that likes Korean girls, but he's had zero success getting any Korean girl to go out on a date with him because he's not Korean. Seriously. Being an engineer and driving a Lexus didn't help.)
I think I would watch Joy Luck Club again for the answer to the other one. I don't know any other answer but citizenship and status. Though interacting with their relatives might get awkward after a while.
Quote from: FireArrow on October 02, 2014, 09:15:27 PMMost of the Asians I've talked to seem really proud of their race and would never date outside of it. Considering 90% of my friend are Asian, I actually find this really annoying. >_>
As far as I know, the old Korean mindset is that you don't let your blood mix with other races.
Also it might just be that white girls look older than asian guys(imo anyway).
^That sounds about right...from what he said.
Okay, real question. How do I get someone to pay attention to me when he's playing the new Smash Brothers game?
Play with him obviously.
Shirt off
Pants off
shoes off
Hands-off!
HEAD-ON: APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD
The posts got progressively less funny. D:
That's how it works around here
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 05, 2014, 03:57:57 AMThat's how it works around here
It's starting to all make sense now
Is this the real life
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on October 02, 2014, 01:36:59 PMIf international student, high probability of looking for dat citizenship marriage.
Otherwise idk, maybe you're just a reasonable person and they enjoy your company and it isn't just because 'asian girl' since there is far more to that identifier than a single generalized persona :P
I was joking about the "having a thing for nerdy white guys" thing, haha. I just have no idea why, within the past 2 weeks, 6 people with no connection to one another started coming onto me pretty strong, and all of them are asian O.o
Although the citizenship thing might explain it for one girl in my theory class, lol
Quote from: Waddle Bro on October 04, 2014, 01:26:41 AMShirt off
Quote from: Yugi on October 04, 2014, 03:42:00 PMshoes off
service off
Also, obligatory C&H:
Spoiler
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lowbird.com%2Fdata%2Fimages%2F2010%2F11%2Fhatoff-all.png&hash=c8f2a862093bd62a64d7604158e5414b7ba6804f)
Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 05, 2014, 03:57:57 AMThat's how it works around here
Luckily we have Fierce and C&H to change this
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2Fc0tg0DM.png&hash=2e87550591b44bad259a72afe9fde52435a0d110)
guys if i watch this video i'll learn how to marry a millionaire
Don't ask me why I'm getting these emails, I don't know why.
It thinks your a girl because of your forum profile.
I need to know this loophole forward me the email asap
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FVe1SJcp.png&hash=f70cc7e61e0db090c3c36afdda64b7bb077c0b7c)
guys i'm finally in a relationship
whats swimmig
lel congretz
...wut
i think im being lowkey stalked .-.
Clearly it isn't low key enough
dammit, i've been revealed
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on November 09, 2014, 04:55:24 PMI love you fingerz
the truth comes out via epic freudian slip
Damnit, too late to edit. Screw you Slow! I'm gonna blame this one on being super exhausted from work. Also I'm gay for fingerz or Fierce or whatever the take away from this is
On another note, there's a super insanely pretty girl in my Chem lab I talk to a lot and I think I'm gonna ask her to go to Rocky Horror with me. Best first date because of how utterly polarizing Rocky Horror is. You either love it or you suck.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on November 09, 2014, 04:55:24 PMI love you fingerz
I 100% forgive you, mainly because the idea of you hitting on fingerz just MMD
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I got another one.
Yours TENACIOUSLY
These letters come across as borderline stalker-ish.
"the honor to learn you more"
The fact that there are three individual instances of laughter followed by an ellipse is particularly funny to me.
Quote from: FierceDeity on November 10, 2014, 06:46:48 AMThe fact that there are three individual instances of laughter followed by an ellipse is particularly funny to me.
LOL...
HAHAHA...
Might as well post here because I do have some relevant stuff going on, even if it's a jumbled mess:
-This one girl in a friend group of mine keeps blatantly hitting on me despite my complete lack of reciprocation and it's making it pretty uncomfortable to hang out with them
-One girl in music here who I'm really into seems to kinda reciprocate that which is neat, and to top it off a friend from back home messaged me out of the blue "I have a friend in my program who's in Prague and you should date her" and was talking about this girl, so that was some kinda funny confirmation. But now it's kind of ambiguous as to whether she's dating this other guy, so I'm entirely unsure how to proceed. Probably asking a mutual friend for clarification soon.
-Another girl at this abroad site, my roommate from last semester and her roommate from last semester really wanted to set us up, so they thought Prague would be a great time to set us up. My roommate this semester also brought it up, saying he could set us up if I wanted, and while I think she's cute and really sweet and all, I don't actually know her that well, and I'd feel bad going into something likely long term while my heart's in other places, even if just to test the waters.
-There's another girl from that initial friend group who I kinda had a crush on last year, and she seems pretty into me now, but I've started realizing we wouldn't even remotely work as a long-term relationship. Then again, she also recently said the words "I don't believe in long-term relationships", and I still find her absurdly cute, so maybe I could actually look into that without hurting anyone?
Tl;dr idk what you thought before, but I don't actually have my shit together.
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 23, 2015, 03:18:51 PMBut now it's kind of ambiguous as to whether she's dating this other guy, so I'm entirely unsure how to proceed. Probably asking a mutual friend for clarification soon.
I think the best way to ask a girl out and to get more information about what she is actually looking for is
Spoiler
to just f***ing ask her out. Seriously, just ask her... Wtf is all this "Ask a friend to ask a friend to ask her about..."? I do not understand...
Still interesting. Make sure to keep us up to date with your progress and good luck!
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 23, 2015, 03:18:51 PM-This one girl in a friend group of mine keeps blatantly hitting on me despite my complete lack of reciprocation and it's making it pretty uncomfortable to hang out with them
Ohh... Maybe that is the reason ZeldaFan does not talk to me on skype anymore... Hm...
Is she just hitting on you for fun, or is she serious about it? You should tell her if it's uncomfortable....
Conclusion: Just talk to people in an honest way...
I am such a good adviser, right?
Quote from: Xaoz on February 23, 2015, 04:02:57 PMI think the best way to ask a girl out and to get more information about what she is actually looking for is
Spoiler
to just f***ing ask her out. Seriously, just ask her... Wtf is all this "Ask a friend to ask a friend to ask her about..."? I do not understand...
Oh no yeah, I may not be the most confident dude but even I would never have a friend actually interact with somebody for me. I just want to know if she's actually dating this person just because there are a lot of tangible, negative outcomes that could result from me asking without knowing, such as making things uncomfortable with that friend group (it's not just her that I risk alienating), or being too much of a dick to the guy, because honestly I kinda like him.
Quote from: Xaoz on February 23, 2015, 04:02:57 PMIs she just hitting on you for fun, or is she serious about it? You should tell her if it's uncomfortable....
It started off as completely serious, but now I think she's just continuing because she finds my (amply voiced) discomfort humorous, haha. It's not that bad, seeing as I just ignore her for the most part when I'm with those people, but I don't want to have to do that :/ I'm really not one for being an outright dick to people, ya know
Quote from: Xaoz on February 23, 2015, 04:02:57 PMConclusion: Just talk to people in an honest way...
I think everybody could do good to listen to this advice.
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 23, 2015, 04:17:45 PMOh no yeah, I may not be the most confident dude but even I would never have a friend actually interact with somebody for me. I just want to know if she's actually dating this person just because there are a lot of tangible, negative outcomes that could result from me asking without knowing, such as making things uncomfortable with that friend group (it's not just her that I risk alienating), or being too much of a dick to the guy, because honestly I kinda like him.
Okay, let me boost your confidence: You can do it!
You have nice hair, are musical and eloquent. Woah... That is the nicest stuff I ever said to anyone like... ever... You see how much I want you to succeed on this!
There is nothing wrong with ever asking a girl out, when it is not obvious that she is in a realtionship. From what you say you seem to know her well enough to judge that. There is a good trick to actually find out if a girl is in a relationship:
Spoiler
"Are you currently in a relationship?" Of course, you can always be a bit more subtly...
Obviously, it would be good to just check if she actually even likes you. You should keep the "you can touch my hair"-stuff for later.
Asking out a friend can always end up in a mess, but no risk, no fun! Just do it!
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 23, 2015, 04:17:45 PMIt started off as completely serious, but now I think she's just continuing because she finds my (amply voiced) discomfort humorous, haha. It's not that bad, seeing as I just ignore her for the most part when I'm with those people, but I don't want to have to do that :/ I'm really not one for being an outright dick to people, ya know
If you don't want to be, then stop ignoring her and tell her you are not interested. And you should make sure that she gets that you actually mean what you say.
I feel like my only advice is always to just talk to people... But damn, it is such a GOOD advice...
No dating until you're married.
Looks like you've got a lot of cute girls to ask out, why not ask them all out? You don't have to go steady but if there's a girl that you like a lot ask her out again and maybe it'll turn into a steady relationship
I've been on almost no dates and here I am giving dating advice
yeeee
Quote from: FierceDeity on February 23, 2015, 03:18:51 PMBut now it's kind of ambiguous as to whether she's dating this other guy, so I'm entirely unsure how to proceed. Probably asking a mutual friend for clarification soon.
So, I was introduced to some friend of a girl I know and he was like "oh I thought you were dated her" but in actuality it was just us hanging out very often since we are good friends and in the same major. Don't overthink things is I guess what I'm saying lol
Lol I had one of those awkward conversations where this random classmate just suddenly said "Wait, you two AREN'T dating?" to this other guy in my class and this whiny girl that always talks about herself (and her diet of fries and soup) while I was with them. I'm usually seen with the other guy too, so I don't know what made her think that? (Not that I was interested but I was too lazy to make other friends at that time)
>_>
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.bobsplans.com%2FBobsPlans%2FDoghouse%2FImages%2FDoghouse-500x500.jpg&hash=dfb33804029412eb2932d19f384ab3278b74d509)
Quote from: Ruto on February 23, 2015, 07:02:32 PMLol I had one of those awkward conversations where this random classmate just suddenly said "Wait, you two AREN'T dating?" to this other guy in my class and this whiny girl that always talks about herself (and her diet of fries and soup) while I was with them. I'm usually seen with the other guy too, so I don't know what made her think that? (Not that I was interested but I was too lazy to make other friends at that time)
Are you in school or college?
Just wondering. :)
Saria is 15 (according to her profile) so I just assume you are in college :P
SO I NEED TO ASK SOMEONE TO PROM BUT IDK HOW TO ASK A STRANGER. ANYONE DONE IT BEFORE?
I'm free, if you require my services. Not free of charge, though. You'll have to pay for my flights and accommodation. :P
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 23, 2015, 08:14:37 PMSO I NEED TO ASK SOMEONE TO PROM BUT IDK HOW TO ASK A STRANGER. ANYONE DONE IT BEFORE?
YES
DONT ASK A STRANGER
in all seriousness I can speak from experience that it is not a nice thing when someone you've never talked to EVER asks you to prom, no matter how flattering you may think it is
okay well I'd be asking someone who knows who I am
but the thing is when I was younger, believe it or not, I was really annoying. I can't believe nobody punched me. I would've punched myself. So I kind of had a bad reputation with EVERYONE. I was mature for about a year where I sat quietly in my classes and said nothing, then I jumped at the chance to go to college. So I don't really know anyone from my school well enough to be like hey, go to prom with me flowers cards chocolate stuffed animals bad puns? Is it okay just to ask someone to prom, basically.
hrmmm I still say no but whatever
Why are you so eager to go to prom though? There's nothing wrong with going alone- in fact I'm planning for it this year.
Senior prom and whatnot
big occasion doncha know
it doesn't help that half the girls in my school are already going steady with someone
I hate modern dating conventions
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 23, 2015, 09:33:44 PMI hate modern dating conventions
Then why bother with them? I spent the time of prom just chilling with a group of friends somewhere far away without any of that kind of pressure - it was more fun that way. Cheaper, too [emoji14]
Let me rephrase what I said before. Don't ask a stranger to prom if you're not prepared to GO to prom. If you ask them you're basically promising them a fun time together and you better be prepared to deliver.
But like you said, senior prom, big stuff. Don't ask some girl and ruin her experience if you're just asking her so you can have a date
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 23, 2015, 09:33:44 PMI hate modern dating conventions
I just reactivated my Tinder and got another app to try these modern dating conventions.
People of CA come at me.
Maybe I'll find a lucky girl/guy.
Otherwise, I'm just gonna ask my friends to start setting me up.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 23, 2015, 09:14:27 PMokay well I'd be asking someone who knows who I am
but the thing is when I was younger, believe it or not, I was really annoying. I can't believe nobody punched me. I would've punched myself. So I kind of had a bad reputation with EVERYONE. I was mature for about a year where I sat quietly in my classes and said nothing, then I jumped at the chance to go to college. So I don't really know anyone from my school well enough to be like hey, go to prom with me flowers cards chocolate stuffed animals bad puns? Is it okay just to ask someone to prom, basically.
I got asked to my junior prom by a guy I had one math class with. So, I guess? If you know them and they seem to at least like you as a friend.
Prom doesn't have to be some big romantic thing.
Prom is dumb, and I'm not just saying that because I got stood up(to an extent) at my senior prom, but rather because high school dating itself is frivolous. But this isn't my place to bitch and moan. You want to have fun at prom? Unless you enjoy formal dances, save some money and just go to after prom with some friends, imo much more enjoyable.
Quote from: ETFROXX on February 23, 2015, 10:16:41 PMProm doesn't have to be some big romantic thing.
that's kind of my goal here, just making it casual, but with a person I don't know very well
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on February 23, 2015, 10:33:30 PMUnless you enjoy formal dances
actually I do haha
The fun part about prom isn't the actual prom... but how are you a 16 year old senior wut?
Quote from: the_last_sheikah on February 23, 2015, 10:33:30 PMProm is dumb, and I'm not just saying that because I got stood up(to an extent) at my senior prom, but rather because high school dating itself is frivolous. But this isn't my place to bitch and moan. You want to have fun at prom? Unless you enjoy formal dances, save some money and just go to after prom with some friends, imo much more enjoyable.
It seems to me like people really make a big deal about prom, yet... the idea of such events doesn't really appeal to me.
um so
in pe we're doing a dancing unit and the teacher picked who would be paired up for the whole unit
he paired me up with my crush
what do i do
Take this opportunity by the balls.
Quote from: Yugi on February 24, 2015, 01:05:19 AMum so
in pe we're doing a dancing unit and the teacher picked who would be paired up for the whole unit
he paired me up with my crush
what do i do
well, dance
what else would you be doing
Quote from: Yugi on February 24, 2015, 01:05:19 AMum so
in pe we're doing a dancing unit and the teacher picked who would be paired up for the whole unit
he paired me up with my crush
what do i do
Quote from: Yugi on February 24, 2015, 01:05:19 AMum so
in pe we're doing a dancing unit and the teacher picked who would be paired up for the whole unit
he paired me up with my crush
what do i do
Lol, happened to me last year :P
Quote from: FireArrow on February 23, 2015, 11:06:47 PMThe fun part about prom isn't the actual prom... but how are you a 16 year old senior wut?
I was a sixteen year old senior lolol
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 23, 2015, 09:33:44 PMSenior prom and whatnot
big occasion doncha know
nah I skipped that shit
Quote from: Yugi on February 24, 2015, 01:05:19 AMum so
in pe we're doing a dancing unit and the teacher picked who would be paired up for the whole unit
he paired me up with my crush
what do i do
wen u hug, whisper in her ear, "dont go home. he knows" or "i see ded ppl" or "your hair smells good" or "i want fried chicken" (BECUZ ITS HIGHLY LIKELY SHE'D HAV FRIED CHICKEN N U GUYZ COULD GO IN THE CORNER 2GETHER 2 EET SUM)
Nah don't do any of those things. DONT BE CREEPY. DONT SMELL HER. DONT BE STRAIGHTFORWARD SAYING "i want u now." If it's ballroom dancing DONT MOVE YOUR HAND DOWN.
Quote from: KefkaticFanatic on February 24, 2015, 01:59:10 AM*video*
AGAHAHAHAHAHA
Quote from: Saria on February 24, 2015, 02:29:59 PMwen u hug, whisper in her ear, "dont go home. he knows" or "i see ded ppl" or "your hair smells good" or "i want fried chicken" (BECUZ ITS HIGHLY LIKELY SHE'D HAV FRIED CHICKEN N U GUYZ COULD GO IN THE CORNER 2GETHER 2 EET SUM)
Spoiler
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Quote from: Saria on February 24, 2015, 02:29:59 PMNah don't do any of those things. DONT BE CREEPY. DONT SMELL HER. DONT BE STRAIGHTFORWARD SAYING "i want u now." If it's ballroom dancing DONT MOVE YOUR HAND DOWN.
but what if she smells good
like really really good
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on February 24, 2015, 03:19:01 PMbut what if she smells good
like really really good
Most girls are :P
But yeah. She's right. Don't do anything creepy.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on February 24, 2015, 03:19:01 PMbut what if she smells good
like really really good
Just don't take obvious deep breaths or comment on her smell akaka
You could compliment her like "you have pretty eyes" but don't be complimenting her all the time because that would make you sound obsessed.
or just walk up and say hi and walk away
who cares about dancing
mmm...
I really like how you smell!
My manhunk is so cute. I like to look at him during class. It's distracting. Should I mutilate his face so I could focus in class.
That really seems like the only logical course of action!
Quote from: Saria on March 02, 2015, 08:28:39 AMMy manhunk is so cute. I like to look at him during class. It's distracting. Should I mutilate his face so I could focus in class.
No! If they find out, you will go to prison! :o Of course, that
would solve the distraction problem...
"This is how I played it growing up!"
"WHERE DID YOU GROW UP?!?"
"In prison."
So if things move along nicely with cute guy friend I'm gonna need to know some stuff.
a. how do i tell when someone is flirting
b. how do i flirt
c. how do i not look stupid when flirting
d. how do i pick up signs if he's interested in me
A) Innuendo, generally speaking.
B) Physical contact usually does the trick for most guys. They're not wired to handle subtlety.
C) Not possible.
D) He keeps engaging with you in anything.
"Sending signals is like flirting- it happens naturally, but once you start thinking about it, it becomes impossible."
Don't remember who said that but I'm sure the opposite is also true (flirting is like sending signals)
So if you wanna get good at flirting, play MTG
So basically play it cool even though there's a good chance I can turn into a nervous idiot, got it.
Quote from: Nebbles on March 02, 2015, 01:17:36 PMSo basically play it cool even though there's a good chance I can turn into a nervous idiot, got it.
Welcome to the wonderful world of dating.
Rats. Well I get to date a cute boy if things work out, so I guess it can't be that bad, huh?
Quote from: Nebbles on March 02, 2015, 01:24:50 PMRats. Well I get to date a cute boy if things work out, so I guess it can't be that bad, huh?
then you break up with him but you want to stay friends because they're really cool and they were your best friend before you started dating. so you both make slight efforts to hang out after that, but one of you has a really busy schedule and slight efforts aren't enough. So even though you consider yourselves "friends" after the break-up, you've only ever been to her house after that in order to take care of her cats/turtle while she's out on vacation. she made a drawing for you and posted it on facebook, that was nice. but whenever you suggest hanging out or delivering a birthday present, she's either not home or she forgets about it the next day. A month later, you realize the cookies you were going to give her to reestablish your friendship are slightly expired, so you share it with your brother who is visiting from another country. they taste good.
that's not good advice 0/10 try again
Oh dear, Nebbles, had I known you needed such help. Here we go.
Quote from: Nebbles on March 02, 2015, 12:59:11 PMa. how do i tell when someone is flirting
b. how do i flirt
c. how do i not look stupid when flirting
d. how do i pick up signs if he's interested in me
An answer isn't cut and dry, but for the most part:
a) Body language and speech patterns. Are they speaking in ways considered atypical from their normal? Are they more complimentary? Less? Could what they are saying have other intentions(see b)? Do they keep eye contact when talking to you? Do they try to get close to you(in a non-creepy way)? Do they shy away? Pay attention for light perspiration and flushed complexion.
b) Answer me this: what is the objective of flirting? To display/imply/make known your intentions either subtly or not. If the goal is sex, innuendo and physical contact are ideal options as Maestro said. If the goal is a steady relationship or if you are unsure of yourself, compliments and cuteness(batting eyelashes, light giggling) can go a long way.
c)Wrong question to ask. 'How do I not embarrass myself while flirting?' is a better one. Know your comfort zone. If you think you would be uncomfortable doing something, then find something similar that you are comfortable with. Be yourself, I know that phase has been beaten to death, but it's true and more often than not, it works.
d)See answer to a. If they appear to reciprocate your actions/compliments/etc., they are most likely interested. If you are confident enough and think you're both ready, you can just ask. ::)
Flirting is weird. It's all about taking chances, trying to find out what works, like a strange game of mao. As I said before, be yourself, you'll be fine.
sheikah no! You can't make it so complicated!
Relationships are complicated!
Why thank you, Sheikah! :D We're hanging out again soon, so I figured I should try to look for these things, if anything...
I have a scary intuition for when someone has a crush... In the last year I've noticed something was off with four different people and within a week they asked someone out.
Anyway it's a dangerous season for high schoolers not looking for a prom date rn >.> I'm just trying to live
I could sure use that intuition lol
Quote from: Bubbles on March 02, 2015, 04:57:11 PMAnyway it's a dangerous season for high schoolers not looking for a prom date rn >.>
(https://33.media.tumblr.com/913ba20bccf008a0502ab3ac903749a7/tumblr_mv7eif3LY81rwva3mo5_500.gif)
I was having a really nice time with a group of people including one guy who seriously brightens my mood everyday (we both liked each other at one point but its purely platonic now i think) and he just casually mentioned he has the really bad type of lymes. I'm not really ranting because it's not my place to, but I actually almost started crying right in front of him because apparently I didn't know how much I cared about him :(
Anyway this weekend had a bunch of bonding, both romantically and platonically and i am v happy and v tired
Cute guy friend apologized to me for not having super great communication when trying to plan hang outs because work had kept him super busy and he said he doesn't want to seem like he's being flaky with me, so that made me pretty happy. Poor boy really does want to hang out, he's just so busy...
Quote from: Bubbles on March 02, 2015, 04:57:11 PMI have a scary intuition for when someone has a crush...
Yup, me too! But it doesn't work for me, so proving the point that all amazing abilities have their downfall... XD
Quote from: Shadoninja on March 08, 2015, 02:58:56 PMI ship it.
He's half a foot shorter than me and taken so
Quote from: fingerz on March 08, 2015, 07:29:15 PMYup, me too! But it doesn't work for me, so proving the point that all amazing abilities have their downfall... XD
Yep, thats the same for me. I hate getting caught off guard but what can you do
Quote from: Nebbles on March 08, 2015, 02:44:57 PMCute guy friend apologized to me for not having super great communication when trying to plan hang outs because work had kept him super busy and he said he doesn't want to seem like he's being flaky with me, so that made me pretty happy. Poor boy really does want to hang out, he's just so busy...
You should post a pic of him. I'm very very curious of what he looks like.....
...that's very creepy to post a picture of someone on the internet without their permission/knowing. I mean, if we end up dating and take a cute picture together or something, sure.
Quote from: Nebbles on March 08, 2015, 08:56:15 PMI mean, if we end up dating and take a cute picture together or something, sure.
Yeah, this is what I meant. I wouldn't want you to post a pic of him without his permission :P
I ship it.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.troll.me%2Fimages%2Fbush%2Fship-it.jpg&hash=b6e4cc020de5d89b69581dc5a8d1bad7ade04ac9)
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 08, 2015, 09:20:23 PM(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.troll.me%2Fimages%2Fbush%2Fship-it.jpg&hash=b6e4cc020de5d89b69581dc5a8d1bad7ade04ac9)
XD lol
You know when you can't tell if someone is dropping hints or not? Bluh, I'm so dense.
Quote from: FireArrow on March 11, 2015, 05:47:03 PMYou know when you can't tell if someone is dropping hints or not? Bluh, I'm so dense.
...Or they're being way too subtle.
In my experience, guys are usually pretty dense, so it's not just you. Subtle hints don't work so a girl often has to just come right out and say "I like you" or "Let's hang out" or whatever
But honestly I wish guys would do that too!
Quote from: ZeldaFan on March 11, 2015, 08:18:32 PMIn my experience, guys are usually pretty dense, so it's not just you. Subtle hints don't work so a girl often has to just come right out and say "I like you" or "Let's hang out" or whatever
But honestly I wish guys would do that too!
The problem for many people is that they don't want to misinterpret something that wasn't a "hint" as a "hint," and thus come across the wrong way.
Quote from: FireArrow on March 11, 2015, 05:47:03 PMYou know when you can't tell if someone is dropping hints or not? Bluh, I'm so dense.
Hahaha! Nope, I can tell if someone's hinting at something no matter how slight it is... So long as I don't like 'em myself. If I do, I don't know what they're doing anymore. XD
Seriously, my friends come to me to ask if someone we know potentially likes 'em. I've not been wrong to date. :P
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on March 11, 2015, 08:52:17 PMThe problem for many people is that they don't want to misinterpret something that wasn't a "hint" as a "hint," and thus come across the wrong way.
Yeah this. I need fingerz powa ;-;
So things between cute guy friend and I didn't work out. He told me we're just friends, but hey, he's still a cool dude and I'm happy we're able to still hang out and be pals.
'tis always more fish in the sea.
At least you're still friends, that's always good. =D It's a lot better than not being able to talk to them anymore. Keeping them in your life is good enough.
Indeed! We're still gonna be great pals and continue to hang out, so no harm is done at all, and that's all that matters.
Sorry to hear that it didn't work out Nebbles, but hey, friends is still good, and you seem to have made out better that most would have in that situation. So yeah, yay friendship!
I mean, he just said "I don't want to lead you on, we're just friends here" so I was like "welp, that answers my questions" so it's all settled pretty much.
That's good he was open and forthcoming with it.
I know of so many people that just string someone along until the other person breaks down and freaks out. (I know because I've been there -_-)
Ouch. Sudden, but important to say/hear.
Quote from: DrP on March 24, 2015, 10:14:00 PMI know of so many people that just string someone along until the other person breaks down and freaks out. (I know because I've been there -_-)
Preach it brother, me too.
Well, I had confronted him about the lack of communication that was happening, and he said that. Which is good, you know, so I wasn't being strung along for months thinking I was gonna get a date here. That type of honesty is good, yo! He wasn't rude about it.
I'm glad you have a positive outlook about all this.
It's not like I was hopelessly in love or anything, it was a crush yeah, but I'm still keeping him as a friend and we're both not awkward about it. I take this as a good thing - we're friends, it's not awkward, I'll move on and find another crush sooner or later.
I like being positive. It gives me a better outlook on things.
at least he wasn't too scared to let you down and hatch a plot with his sister to act as his girlfriend to well-meaningly crush your soul
what a way to start the 100th page
Who knows, maybe one day he will see the light and you can escape that dreaded "friend zone."
Or he's gay, so you were doomed from the start.
I have to appeal to both sides of the spectrum of optimistic/pessimistic outcomes.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 25, 2015, 07:42:14 AMWho knows, maybe one day he will see the light and you can escape that dreaded "friend zone."
Or he's gay, so you were doomed from the start.
I have to appeal to both sides of the spectrum of optimistic/pessimistic outcomes.
Well quite frankly I'm a goddamned delight, so if he doesn't see that, his loss.
I'd turn straight for you any day. <3
LMAO what a compliment friend, thank you
Oh yeah? Well I'd re-turn straight for you every other Thursday!
Every other Thursday? Oh my.
How dare you accost me in such a way! I'm a happily married man, thank you.
I already am straight and am trying to get da wimminz without luck
That's my case in a nutshell too, but quite frankly I think I've become even pickier than usual... My brain seems to think only the best of the best will do. I'm yet to come across one of them that ACTUALLY likes me. :P
Okay, that's pretty funny xD
After a 2 year search I have finally found the 4th Mrs. Maestro.
I hope she likes the first 3.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on March 30, 2015, 06:34:54 PMAfter a 2 year search I have finally found the 4th Mrs. Maestro.
I hope she likes the first 3.
As long as you're not Bluebeard lol
Quote from: Ruto on March 30, 2015, 06:50:12 PMAs long as you're not Bluebeard lol
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi3.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F017%2F204%2FCaptainAmerica1_zps8c295f96.JPG&hash=6592cd1da5b044a3a69ce845e64362b780cf04b1)
Sigh... girls are difficult. (Pertinent bump...)
some guys are just as difficult
HOLY CRAP CAN YOU PEOPLE THAT HAVEN'T SHOWN UP FOR EXTENDED PERIODS OF TIME STOP DOING THAT THING IT'S WEIRDING ME OUT
I should try and get bloo to make a post.
Quote from: Dudeman on December 14, 2015, 11:04:22 PMHOLY CRAP CAN YOU PEOPLE THAT HAVEN'T SHOWN UP FOR EXTENDED PERIODS OF TIME STOP DOING THAT THING IT'S WEIRDING ME OUT
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi3.kym-cdn.com%2Fentries%2Ficons%2Foriginal%2F000%2F017%2F204%2FCaptainAmerica1_zps8c295f96.JPG&hash=6592cd1da5b044a3a69ce845e64362b780cf04b1)
Quantum chemistry is harder than understanding wimminz.
Quote from: FireArrow on December 14, 2015, 11:14:40 PMI should try and get bloo to make a post.
Don't bother. I try every day :/
It's worth noting, though, that the most of people's disagreements with Blue came from the politics and religion threads. He could of easily stayed and contributed to the site while staying out of those if he couldn't handle it or didn't want to handle it or whatever the situation is.
It seems to me Blue was ready to be done with NSM, unlike Deku who seemed to just gone on indefinite break rather than saying "I'm gone and not coming back" kind of thing.
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on January 01, 2016, 07:09:35 PMIt's worth noting, though, that the most of people's disagreements with Blue came from the politics and religion threads. He could of easily stayed and contributed to the site while staying out of those if he couldn't handle it or didn't want to handle it or whatever the situation is.
It seems to me Blue was ready to be done with NSM, unlike Deku who seemed to just gone on indefinite break rather than saying "I'm gone and not coming back" kind of thing.
for someone who's so smart, you sure make a lot of common grammar errors
anyway, a lot of people on this site are pretty dumb when it comes to important topics and blue was sick of trying to explain to these certain people exactly what they were doing wrong (hint: calling people bigots for standing up for their beliefs is not a cool thing to do). So it wasn't those 2 threads that caused problems, it was the people ridiculing him for his personal ideology. Also why even post 16 days late about something that doesn't even have to do with the topic
PDS pls
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 01, 2016, 07:25:24 PMfor someone who's so smart, you sure make a lot of common grammar errors
anyway, a lot of people on this site are pretty dumb when it comes to important topics and blue was sick of trying to explain to these certain people exactly what they were doing wrong (hint: calling people bigots for standing up for their beliefs is not a cool thing to do). So it wasn't those 2 threads that caused problems, it was the people ridiculing him for his personal ideology. Also why even post 16 days late about something that doesn't even have to do with the topic
PDS pls
Hope you're being sarcastic.
hope you know you're one of those people ::)
wtf am I reading
BTW, our new mods sure are doing a great job at keeping the peace!!
The Hall of Quotes abridged.
Quote from: Dude on January 01, 2016, 08:52:11 PMBTW, our new mods sure are doing a great job at keeping the peace!!
No one's been insultingly burned yet. Let's keep it that way.
From a biased point of view, I guess.
A mod can't stop all arguments. That's impossible. The mod's job is to make it so we don't have all hell breaking loose- not equivalent to the usual run-of-the-mill arguments between the two unspoken kinds of people at NSM.
Quote from: Dudeman on January 01, 2016, 08:56:04 PMNo one's been insultingly burned yet. Let's keep it that way.
Quote from: Dude on January 01, 2016, 08:57:05 PMFrom a biased point of view, I guess.
If it's anything I learned from the internet is that suddenly people can lose their ability to read. Whether the reasoning is there is up for debate. Kind of like the dwarf with the axe in his head, I think people only hear what they want to hear from that guy.
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on January 01, 2016, 08:59:22 PMThe mod's job is to make it so we don't have all hell breaking loose- not equivalent to the usual run-of-the-mill arguments between the two unspoken kinds of people at NSM.
*Everyone* should be better at keeping their heads down, yes. But thanks for saying that so I don't have to.
I saw this thread got posted in and thought I was gonna get a juicy relationship problem that I could help work through >:[ someone better either cut the argument or bring me some love trouble
Quote from: Bubbles on January 01, 2016, 10:02:02 PMI saw this thread got posted in and thought I was gonna get a juicy relationship problem that I could help work through >:[ someone better either cut the argument or bring me some love trouble
there aren't any cute girls in my town wat do
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 01, 2016, 10:03:14 PMthere aren't any cute girls in my town wat do
Rethink your definition of cute ; ) cuteness is far more prevalent in personality traits than physical appearances, but you'll never see those traits if you turn them away without getting to know them
im trying to call this one person to arrange a date but they arent picking up the phone, and there's a 99% chance neither of us will have time to hang out once school starts
...i guess i could just text them or send them a facebook message?
Yes a text based message would definitely be better. They might be uncomfortable with picking up the phone, or live a busy life where they don't have enough time to have a conversation like that. Texting would let them answer on their own time and also ensure that they're actually getting the message.
Good luck!!
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 01, 2016, 10:03:14 PMthere aren't any cute girls in my town wat do
Wait are you living in Tooele rn?
Yeah, everyone texts now anyways. get wit duh times
Quote from: Dudeman on January 01, 2016, 08:56:04 PMNo one's been insultingly burned yet. Let's keep it that way.
Because noc's post is totally within forum rules?
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 01, 2016, 07:25:24 PMfor someone who's so smart, you sure make a lot of common grammar errors
anyway, a lot of people on this site are pretty dumb when it comes to important topics and blue was sick of trying to explain to these certain people exactly what they were doing wrong (hint: calling people bigots for standing up for their beliefs is not a cool thing to do). So it wasn't those 2 threads that caused problems, it was the people ridiculing him for his personal ideology. Also why even post 16 days late about something that doesn't even have to do with the topic
PDS pls
Yeah. This one was, anyways.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 01, 2016, 08:38:47 PMhope you know you're one of those people ::)
And while this isn't the nicest thing to say, banning people because they're mean is a bit authoritarian. Everyone is perceived as mean by someone (though some more than others).
That said, I shall actually respond to this post, in the debate topic.
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on January 01, 2016, 11:19:53 PMThat said, I shall actually respond to this post, in the [not dating drama] topic.
thank
Quote from: Jub3r7 on January 01, 2016, 10:11:10 PMim trying to call this one person to arrange a date but they arent picking up the phone, and there's a 99% chance neither of us will have time to hang out once school starts
...i guess i could just text them or send them a facebook message?
oh my god
i have no idea what to do. Me and my girlfriend are extremely close. Right now though, I am a senior in high school. She is a sophomore. We attend a school that in its own right is something like a boarding school so we both live in different parts of the state. We are also both visually impaired so there is no chance either one of us will have a driver's license. What should i do?
1) how long you been dating
2) is there a reason this is a problem *now*?
You'll have to make the decision (preferably with your girlfriends input) of whether or not you want to go long distance. It's a tough choice, and one that's entirely your own. However, it should be said that long distance relationships are nearly if not always quite hard; that being said, if you feel the relationship is worth enough to you to keep going (which it seems you do), then by all means try and make it work long distance.
Quote from: Altissimo on January 07, 2016, 03:53:09 PM1) how long you been dating
2) is there a reason this is a problem *now*?
1. about 6 months, however me and her seem to have a stronger connection and more ease with communicating than people who i've dated for a long period of time
2. i'm just saying this is a problem because the date is fast approaching
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on January 07, 2016, 04:21:37 PMYou'll have to make the decision (preferably with your girlfriends input) of whether or not you want to go long distance. It's a tough choice, and one that's entirely your own. However, it should be said that long distance relationships are nearly if not always quite hard; that being said, if you feel the relationship is worth enough to you to keep going (which it seems you do), then by all means try and make it work long distance.
I don't know how she'll take it. I know first hand how hard it can be and I'm willing to bear with it. The problem comes with how exactly to talk to her about it. We both generally try to avoid the subject about me graduating bc it's kind of disheartening topic for the both of us.
Is there any chance of you ending up near each other after High School?
Even if you are far apart, things can still have a way of working out. I don't have a long-distance relationship like yours, but I do live a long distance from each of my siblings and High School friends I was close to. We hardly stay in touch. But, there are times when we're able to meet together, and when we do, I always feel just as close to them, if not closer, than we were before.
I have high school friends that go away for college, but we stay connected via Skype and it works wonderfully, then when we're all back in the same area, we hang out.
The most likely situation for us is that we won't be able to be near each other again until after college.
If you're afraid a long distance relationship could hurt the connection between you two, you can always put the relationship on hold until you guys live near each other again. You also have to ask yourself if this is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with - if not continuing may be more pain than it's worth.
That's also a good point. It can be a hard question to ask at this point if you want to spend your life with this person, but it might offer some guidance. Also, you two should talk about it. Communication is key in any good relationship, and you two can make a solution both are happy with.
Despite what people tend to say, I have seen long distance work well. The problem comes from when people have doubts about it working. I wouldn't expect that you won't see each other until after college. Going to college, even out of state, is not the same as moving away. All this being said, this is a conversation you need to have with her. It'll just take the courage to bring it up.
Double ninja'd.
I think both of us want to spend the rest of our lives together. It does kind of sound silly to say since she's 16 and I'm 18 and relationships at this age don't generally work out but we both get the feeling that there is more than just romance in the air (now that's a skyward sword pun right there). For both of us, this relationship has been the first where every problem was talked out between the both of us and a solution was reached. It has been the first time either of us has been able to talk to someone who could really understand who we are. We share the same political and religious beliefs. I think the both of us are less concerned with being long-distance and more concerned with how we will be able to get back to a closer distance relationship. As I said we are both visually impaired so a lot of our resources are limited with transportation being the most difficult.
Ahhh, then hmm. I don't know how to help in that department. Maybe discuss it with your parents? Would they be willing to help provide transport?
as of right now the plan is that after i graduate I'm going to attend a community college that is actually pretty close to the school. After that she'll be graduating high school and I'll be moving out of my parents house and going to a four year college in the southern region of the state (i live in the northern region). She plans to go to a trade school for two years in the central part of the state. After that's over I'll still be in college for another two years. Right now neither of us know which one will be easier but we seem to have 3 options
1) long distance relationship for the whole time i'm in four year college than I move closer
2) she completes trade school and then moves closer to me
3) we both finish all our schooling and both move to somewhere between where we were previously living
If you can think of anything else let me know but that's all we've been able to think of.
And it is highly unlikely that we will be able to get assistance from either of our parents. (we both only have a mother)
OMG I'm listening to the midi files of my favorite arrangements and the song "I Don't Want to Say Goodbye" came on. F**ked up timing
When you say you go to a boarding school do you mean you literally sleep over/live there or it just draws students from a large area?
What are you guys doing now if you say you won't be able to visit her after you graduate--just being together during school?
I mean that we literally spend weeks at a time living at the school. The school currently draws in students from all areas of the state. And yes the only time we see each other is at school. Of we have tons of things we do off-campus after school hours and on weekends but we never see each other otherwise.
There isn't a way you guys could plan to go to the same 4-year college is there?
She's not planning on going to college. She's planning to go to a trade school
Ok so I need a good free dating site that has an option for gay men.
Preferably not tinder or grindr or anything phone based.
Halp.
http://www.farmersonly.com/
I dunno, match.com and other popular sites are usually gay friendly and are gonna have a lot more selection. They're not bi friendly though so yeah idk.
Quote from: MasterProX on December 14, 2015, 10:26:54 PMSigh... girls are difficult. (Pertinent bump...)
In retrospect, I'm not quite sure why I made this post.
bumping my fav thread :-)
One of my friend's friends saw me with her and was interested so he asked her for my number and we've been talking for a little bit now. But the two times he's seen me I've been sitting down, so he doesn't actually know how tall I am (I'm 99% sure I'm taller than him) and I've never brought it up 😬 should I tell him or should I keep it a surprise for when I see him again and I'm actually standing up
Be natural. Don't hide it, but don't place specific emphasis on it by mentioning it deliberately.
Well yeah but it's kinda an important thing so even not mentioning it could be along the lines of hiding it. Like you're going to tell someone you're talking to if you have an std (if you're not a terrible person anyway) because for most people, that's kinda a deal breaker. You wouldn't wait to let them figure it out
Your height is not comparable to an std lmao. BDS is right, just be natural about it.
Height is pretty different, though; if you don't tell someone "Hey, by the way, I'm actually really tall," it's not going to physically impact them in any way (and if they decide they don't want to date you because you're tall, the end result is the same, and you dodged a bullet!). Also, it's kind of an obvious physical feature once they meet you and see you standing up (which, based on your post, might be happening soon). If you do tell someone that (as in, drawing specific attention to it with no prompt from the other person), and they don't mind at all, then you could come across as self-conscious or insecure, which generally doesn't leave a favorable impression.
ninja'd
Quote from: Olimar12345 on April 30, 2016, 10:07:44 PMYour height is not comparable to an std lmao. BDS is right, just be natural about it.
im bad at analogies okay
I think I'm just curious to see if in the end things don't work out its because of my height or something else. I don't like hearing people say things like "if he doesn't like your height he's not good enough for you!!" because it's totally reasonable to not want someone taller than you and plenty of great guys don't
Honestly though, yes. Height shouldn't actually be a factor because there are so many other substantial things. Ask any guy if they would date their perfect partner under the condition that they're a foot taller than them, and only the fools will say no.
Have you guys ever had a height issue with a relationship though? You couldn't find your perfect partner if they're a foot taller, because then they wouldn't be perfect. You can fantasize about loving the person for themselves and not their appearance but the size issue comes up. A lot. You're not a fool or scumbag because you don't want that
it just seems like such an insignificant factor.
I dunno, I agree with Bubbles - I'm already short and I wouldn't want to date someone necessarily short either. I'd definitely prefer someone taller.
I mean, who else is gonna reach the top of the shelf?
Lol, I don't like being tall, one of my friends gets up close to me and I see EVERYTHING!
I'm gonna have to agree with bubbles here. A surprising number of straight guys I know have "shorter than me" as a requirement because "it's awkward when she's taller than you ya'know?" A lot of guys really value dominance in relationships I guess I dunno?
I was *hanging out* with someone a foot taller at least and it wasn't too bad. Hugs look like this though:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FAwL4tujm.jpg&hash=f459021996d15824593b9edf3718402f6932488f)
Sitting on the couch made other stuff easier.
I think you're thinking too much about this, since can't be as bad as this:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.chilloutzone.net%2Fimages%2Fthumbnails%2Fimages%2F1108%2F12061_shaqs-standgeblaese.jpg&hash=62f98502538a08a46482e527d2e041b2c6101063)
dont google what I just googled
But I can't imagine that as an actual ultimatum from a reasonable person. Maybe it's different coming from a tall guy, but I think it's a shallow idea.
I don't mean to say it might not be a little awkward, but that shouldn't hinder something that would otherwise be great.
Ninjad by Ruto.
I dunno, a lot of people aren't reasonable than.
Not everyone that avoids a relationship for some arbitrary quality is a shallow assholes. Like, someone could be super nice and have great chemistry with you but they get stuck on some dumb fetish or lack thereof. So yes, having a quality that's often but pointlessly deemed as "undesirable" probably is really frustrating. And I don't think telling bubbles it's not an issue is going to help her any either.
My 2 cents at least.
and I'm just over here being 5'6" and shrugging
Not to mention, I feel weird when the guy is significantly shorter. It makes me feel like an escort or something and tbh it's really demeaning. And you know it's always going to come up in conversations too
But anyway the whole point of this is I don't want to make this guy feel like I've been lying to him because, even if not liking a taller girl makes him a shallow asshole, he'd still feel upset after putting effort into me. But at the same time I don't want to mention it because I'm curious, and idk if that's selfish or not
Zunawe would you date someone 4+ inches taller than you? Just curious bc you said you were tall (and don't lie lmao the whole point is that to doesn't make you an ass). Like if you're already that tall I feel you have the right to only choose people shorter because that's who you're most likely to come in contact with and therefore grow more comfortable with
Before seeing this guy in person:
Me (thinking): Pleasebeshorterthan5'8"Pleasebeshorterthan5'8"Pleasebeshorterthan5'8"Pleasebeshorterthan5'8"...
"I'm taller than 6ft"
Since we got along well at that point, I wasn't going to tell him that certain things like ballroom dancing were going to be too hard to do.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 01, 2016, 05:21:22 PMand I'm just over here being 5'6" and shrugging
lol
just an observation, but then I don't really see many guys shorter than 5'8 now. Unless you're 7' tall, significantly shorter isn't going to be that common.
Quote from: FireArrow on May 01, 2016, 05:18:54 PMAnd I don't think telling bubbles it's not an issue is going to help her any either.
If it's actually an extreme insecurity, there isn't anything anyone could say would help you -.-
My friend is really short. Honestly, I don't notice someone's height when I like them until I think about it.
Quote from: Ruto on May 01, 2016, 04:44:44 PMdont google what I just googled
Best guess for this image:
shaquille o neal net worthTut, tut, Ruto, we know your secret!
Quote from: Bubbles on May 01, 2016, 05:36:28 PMZunawe would you date someone 4+ inches taller than you? Just curious bc you said you were tall (and don't lie lmao the whole point is that to doesn't make you an ass). Like if you're already that tall I feel you have the right to only choose people shorter because that's who you're most likely to come in contact with and therefore grow more comfortable with
I'd have no problem with that. At all. Granted, I don't actually know how many girls I've even met in the past few years who are taller than me. It honestly doesn't seem like an issue to me.
Bubbles you're only 6 foot, right
"only"
Sorry, who let one of the seven dwarfs in here? Would have been fine with dopey or sneezy but nooo
6'1" now :-(
My advice would be to wear 3 inch heels
My gut says that will solve a lot of your problems
Also I bet you can find a really cute pair of heels that would complement your hair well
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on May 01, 2016, 06:56:11 PMBest guess for this image: shaquille o neal net worth
Tut, tut, Ruto, we know your secret!
sure thats exactly what I googled so let's not wonder about that anymore
I saw this super tall woman on the train who had to be over 6'5" and she was still wearing heels. She had to duck to board the train.
Other advice: wait for guys to stop growing at around 21 before saying everyone is too short. Everyone seemed so tall in the European countries on average...
i thought you googled big black guys
So going back to the op...
Quote from: Bubbles on April 30, 2016, 09:49:41 PMbumping my fav thread :-)
One of my friend's friends saw me with her and was interested so he asked her for my number and we've been talking for a little bit now. But the two times he's seen me I've been sitting down, so he doesn't actually know how tall I am (I'm 99% sure I'm taller than him) and I've never brought it up 😬 should I tell him or should I keep it a surprise for when I see him again and I'm actually standing up
Obviously your height is something that bothers you a lot, so why not use it as an opportunity to confide in him? Something like "I have a confession to make - I'm the longest child" is gonna come across as really weird. Something more along the lines of "Hey can I tell you something? etc. etc. Being tall makes me feel etc. etc. and it sucks" would both clear any uncertainty that he doesn't like tall girls or something and be an opportunity to get closer to him. ;3
Or that's the way it works out in my head glgl
That actually seems like reasonable advice.
Are you implying I normally give bad advice?
;-;
yes (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?topic=4561.msg321763#msg321763)
nah (http://garritan.custhelp.com/app/answers/detail/a_id/5302/~/updating-the-garritan-aria-player)
next time you see him, walk up behind him without him knowing and use his head as a place to rest your drink/books/labradoodle/ect.
this will both demonstrate to him that you are taller than he is as well as test him for balance and coordination, both of which are, of course, good indicators of genetic excellence
i am tall, i know how this stuff works
i've missed u fam
Quote from: FireArrow on May 01, 2016, 11:19:00 PMSo going back to the op...
Obviously your height is something that bothers you a lot, so why not use it as an opportunity to confide in him? Something like "I have a confession to make - I'm the longest child" is gonna come across as really weird. Something more along the lines of "Hey can I tell you something? etc. etc. Being tall makes me feel etc. etc. and it sucks" would both clear any uncertainty that he doesn't like tall girls or something and be an opportunity to get closer to him. ;3
Or that's the way it works out in my head glgl
late reply lol
Idk if I gave that impression but my height isn't really an insecurity for me? I get tired of talking about it and it is a problem sometimes, but I wouldn't exactly classify it as an insecurity. It's more of a common issue that repeatedly comes up relationship wise. Also I feel like complaining about my height to him would be slightly offensive, like "I have this problem because I'm tall (like you're not), so let me explain." Obv he's going to find out eventually but I think I'm just going to see him in person and let him figure it out himself >:-)
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on May 03, 2016, 12:33:57 AMnext time you see him, walk up behind him without him knowing and use his head as a place to rest your drink/books/labradoodle/ect.
this will both demonstrate to him that you are taller than he is as well as test him for balance and coordination, both of which are, of course, good indicators of genetic excellence
i am tall, i know how this stuff works
hi sfk :') it's been a while
Quote from: Bubbles on May 03, 2016, 06:24:09 PMlate reply lol
Idk if I gave that impression but my height isn't really an insecurity for me? I get tired of talking about it and it is a problem sometimes, but I wouldn't exactly classify it as an insecurity. It's more of a common issue that repeatedly comes up relationship wise. Also I feel like complaining about my height to him would be slightly offensive, like "I have this problem because I'm tall (like you're not), so let me explain." Obv he's going to find out eventually but I think I'm just going to see him in person and let him figure it out himself >:-)
hi sfk :') it's been a while
Oh I knew you weren't insecure about it, I just thought confiding some of the issues it gives you with him may be a good idea. I like your plan too though
maybe put on some heelsI mean, if he's not tall of course he isn't gonna have tall people problems. You're not discrediting any problems he may or may not have.
I have average-height-but-surrounded-by-short-people problems
I have shrunk-2-inches-at-the-age-of-17 issues.
update: I said screw it and told him and he's like "lol ok" ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ don't stress yourself out kids life is good
Overthinking can cause problems that aren't there :P
Then again, I'm one to talk...
lel nice
Here's me and my crush playing piano. I enjoyed being here with her, talking with her made me relax during the recital.
Hope this link works :P (https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=10100584772912737&id=54606847¬if_t=like_tagged¬if_id=1463360116399160)
she looks a lot more nervous than you lol
She definitely is. Her hands were shaking (along with many others) when she did her solo. I, however, was extremely calm (which is new to me) because, as mentioned above, talking with her made me relax a little.
well you nailed it man
No, I didn't... but thanks anyways! :D
There's this kid my piano teacher wanted me to be friends with because we had "similar interests" (in other words, we both like video games) and thought we should become friends. I tried to do that by talking to him about Majora's Mask... He didn't seem to care, so I stuck to my usual tactics on making friends, by making them laugh. He seemed to like making jokes, but he wasn't very talkative.
Where am I going with this? Well at the recital, he was siting in my seat (next to Lauren) and I asked him politely to move. He got up and moved... and didn't seem to enjoy sitting where he was. His head was hung down and he didn't seem happy at all. He didn't seem happy when playing, nor when I complimented his playing. He wasn't like this when I was normally talking to him, so I came to one solution. He had a crush on the same girl I did.
I realized that he wasn't my friend, he was my rival. I'm pretty sure I was higher up in skill than him last year and now he's better than me this year. I feel like I gotta become better than him, not to win the girl, but to win the spot to finish off the recital next year. I don't know who cares or if this is related, but I wanted to say it somewhere and since this is a relationship-related story, I figured this was an appropriate place to tell it.
I have some advice for you: don't try to make enemies- if he wants to pick a fight with you, let him (you can try to defuse the situation if possible, but given the likely circumstances, if your deduction is correct, that might not be reasonably possible), but don't provoke him (I'm not saying you are right now, just avoid doing so, for future reference).
Okay, I'll keep that in mind. (Though I do still feel the need to be better than him at piano, I don't know why).
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 16, 2016, 04:18:33 AM(Though I do still feel the need to be better than him at piano, I don't know why).
(its natural what r you playing?)
Looks to me like you've gotten yourself into an old fashioned pissing contest. Just remember to keep your head level, keep calm and your emotions in check. Keep it cool. Let him fire the shots (if indeed, there are any).
Quote from: ÅŒkami~MD on May 16, 2016, 08:54:03 AM(its natural what r you playing?)
I played "Gauntlet" in the video and Doctor Gradus ad Parnassum for my solo.
Quote from: Clanker37 on May 16, 2016, 09:23:13 AMLooks to me like you've gotten yourself into an old fashioned pissing contest. Just remember to keep your head level, keep calm and your emotions in check. Keep it cool. Let him fire the shots (if indeed, there are any).
Probably won't be too hard, as I'll only see him twice a year.
I need some advice.
I have this guy friend, we went on about 3 dates in December - February, he told me on our second date (2nd time even being together at all...) that he liked me, I told him I didn't want a serious relationship. So we have been friends hanging out once in a while. Since we are both busy, we probably see each other 2-3 times a month.
The more I find out about this guy, the less I like him... He is a very romantic, touchy-feely, mushy, sensitive, emotional person and I'm the complete opposite. In fact, it makes me sort of uncomfortable... He compliments me too often, has given me flowers and cards at least 3 times (not even on special occasions), constantly tells me what an "honor" it is to know me, etc. etc. Sounds like a great guy huh? NO!! It's just too much. All these things are fine in moderation, but it happens too often. I think he thinks we're better friends than I think we are... and that's a problem. I know he wants a relationship with me, but I don't see myself ever being with him.
So now I'm in too deep to just not be friends anymore, but I'm not sure what else I can do. I know that if I just ditched him, he'd fall apart, and I'm too nice to do that...
There's nothing better you can do than to tell him honestly, making yourself completely clear, how you feel about the situation. Nothing will change unless you make it change.
Speaking from experience, a painful truth is incomparably better than uncertainty or false hope.
Quote from: Zunawe on June 27, 2016, 11:14:54 PMSpeaking from experience, a painful truth is incomparably better than uncertainty or false hope.
Mmhmm.
If you don't mind some sharing:
The guy might get really sad for a while. But he'll accept a reasonable and practical explanation and if everything goes well, you'll be the best of friends ever.
I did once have some fun with a not-so-overbearing, cool girl. And I think I was kinda like the touchy-chirpy, smiley dude who loved to say nice and creepy things to you. No one will deny that it hurts a fuckton (perfect for composing btw), but if you can tell a guy that you don't want a serious relationship, you probably have
practical and reasonable explanations for it. So hopefully he'll accept ^^
Either way, the truth is going to have to come out at some point, and the heartbreak is mandatory, so if you can pull it off, try to use reason and logic to get your point across. Because you know, emotions are a thing and they can blind people. Saying "i don't think this is working out, i don't feel right" hurts a lot more than "this might not work because...". As a bonus, if you can, some emotional support is useful when he's on your shoulder and drenching it with tears.
But that being said, no use holding back the truth.
All the best!
(note: cultural differences exist, so this might not apply to your side of the universe, js!)
IMO you'll be far better off giving him the truth bluntly and straightforwardly.
Sometimes guys like that, if they're overdoing it, need to be told that they're overdoing it.
Well, it seems being straightforward is the best option. Now the worst is ahead of me heh
Thanks guys
Well, I just figured out that another girl I like a lot has never loved somebody and wants to love somebody and I dunno if I should go for her or go for my old crush (who has given small hints of liking me). What should I do?
From someone who doesn't love people (in that way anyway) easily I'd say to "go for" your old crush, if you really need to have a definite answer. From your short description it sounds like that's the least risky option and that both of you are more likely to be into each other.
I don't like the idea of someone wanting to "love" (lol) somebody just because they never had before, but that's just me. We probably have different opinions and very different lifestyles tho
In my decidedly idealistic opinion, you don't look for love.
Quote from: Zunawe on August 29, 2016, 10:29:25 PMIn my decidedly idealistic opinion, you don't look for love.
This is me as well. But don't let anyone stop you from pursuing it if your intentions are pure.
Okay, well, I'll probably just wait until next year before making any moves :P
[snip]
I'm trying to get in one of these so-called relationships...no luck so far, though
I totally fucked up any shot I had a while ago, there was a cute boy at Otakon, but I never asked for any contact info because I'm a forgetful, stupid weenie.
So oh well! There will be other chances.
What's the youngest age it's acceptable for a 20 year old to be involved with
18 because anyone below that is a minor
Sweats
Legally, 18.
Socially, 16 (ish).
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 30, 2016, 02:40:54 PMWhat's the youngest age it's acceptable for a 20 year old to be involved with
From Dude:
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FCKOg0eG.jpg&hash=caf3d66e2d5282621b9ba074174ca107fb1964f1)
Thanks Dude.
Dude is the best
:o Kentucky is 16? You'd think it'd be younger than that.
Good thing my state is 16! I'm gonna be 16 next year, so that means I can start banging getting girls!
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on August 30, 2016, 06:54:36 PMGood thing my state is 16! I'm gonna be 16 next year, so that means I can start banging getting girls!
It means the younger person has to be 16 lol.
No 12 year olds
@cashwarrior1 @BrainyLucario
I still think that relationships at such a young age are hardly ever worth it. The way I see it, it just steals your time, energy and potentially money with no clear benefit to you. But maybe that's just me. I personally wouldn't be going out and seeking out a relationship when I'm 15.
Make sure you completely understand the reasons behind what you want to do before acting. But if you still think it's worth it then whatever, just go for it.
I also recommend waiting until you're at least a few years older before seriously considering a relationship. Relationships between people your age generally aren't built on much more than both people wanting love, not necessarily wanting the specific person they hook up with. Take your time and don't feel rushed to find a significant other. Besides, once high school ends, people often end up going their separate ways, and long-distance relationships, while not impossible, are much more difficult when you're younger. Above all, fall in love with a person and not with a body.
Quote from: Dudeman on August 30, 2016, 08:18:10 PMAbove all, fall in love with a person and not with a body.
Thisss
Quote from: braixen1264 on August 30, 2016, 08:04:32 PMI still think that relationships at such a young age are hardly ever worth it. The way I see it, it just steals your time, energy and potentially money with no clear benefit to you. But maybe that's just me. I personally wouldn't be going out and seeking out a relationship when I'm 15.
Make sure you completely understand the reasons behind what you want to do before acting. But if you still think it's worth it then whatever, just go for it.
^
Well, personally I don't want a relationship, because that's time, effort and the dreaded "socialising", but I guess a person can choose what they want to do. I just strongly advise that person to not get a relationship at a young age.
Also thanks to Dude for that wonderful image lol.
Quote from: braixen1264 on August 30, 2016, 08:04:32 PMI still think that relationships at such a young age are hardly ever worth it. The way I see it, it just steals your time, energy and potentially money with no clear benefit to you. But maybe that's just me. I personally wouldn't be going out and seeking out a relationship when I'm 15.
Make sure you completely understand the reasons behind what you want to do before acting. But if you still think it's worth it then whatever, just go for it.
I originally was waiting for college to date anyone, but depression is changing that :'(
[snip]
What's the saying... you have to love yourself before you can love someone ele.
I feel like I'm not portraying my situation/thoughts correctly. If I were to take the time to do so, nobody would bother reading it :P
I mean sometimes it works to just write everything out whether or not it's understandable to anyone but you just so you can get it out and attempt to understand yourself
anyone who follows me on tumblr knows that i use this technique too often and my blog is mostly incomprehensible panicky text posts lmao but hey it works
Callback to my emo prose last winter. I might actually have SAD thinking about it
Quote from: Bubbles on August 31, 2016, 03:30:35 PMI mean sometimes it works to just write everything out whether or not it's understandable to anyone but you just so you can get it out and attempt to understand yourself
Well, I guess you're right. Maybe I'll try doing that next time I have something, because I kinda lost the motivation to keep this going :P. I'm just settled on becoming closer with each of them, to be friends. Then, maybe in 2 years, I might ask them out. (I may want to ask them out, but I'm probably going to delay it for that long :'()
It might actually be a good idea to ask them out on dates. Long term romantic relationships can cause trouble especially since this isn't the part of your life to be doing that. But learning how to interact around the opposite sex is healthy.
I would do that except for the fact that I don't want to go into a relationship with the mindset of "Oh, this is just my first date", because that implies that I'm planning on breaking up. I'll talk to some of my other friends and try to see when they think I should ask them out before trying.
Date != "going steady"
Okay... what?
Oh for the love of...
Can a mod move this to "relationships"
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on August 31, 2016, 06:10:21 PMOh for the love of...
Can a mod move this to "relationships"
oh hey it actually worked
[snip]
Okay :P
In my opinion, I don't think you should jump into anything before college, especially if it's just for the experience or whatever. Sometimes, relationships that early don't last. Kinda going along with what Braix said.
I'm not trying to jump for the experience, but really just so I can get my feelings to the person before it's too late. If I can, we can try to maintain it over the duration of college, but that would be hard.
As depresseing as it sounds, none of the feelings you have in high school will matter once you're out of high school. Dating in high school can be a decent learning expirience but it's by no means a necessary part of the human expirience. Any relatioship you have in high school is probably not gonna last more than 6 months, let alone till you graduate.
I found this love columnist recently and the advice is gold.
Here's the tag for all his articles: http://kotaku.com/tag/ask-dr-nerdlove
This one column lol: http://kotaku.com/ask-dr-nerdlove-my-crush-keeps-betraying-my-christian-1782916675
Some of the stuff is NSFW and also 18+ so don't blame me if you click on something out of *curiosity*
The beginning of that column was good. The rest of it made me feel a little sick
Personally I don't see much value in a relationship unless both parties are comfortable with the idea of spending [lifespan] with each other. I know that might be overly idealistic and optimistic but that's my view. I don't mind being single at my age; very few people are actually worth living for.
Best things I saw while skimming:
Quote from: braixen1264 on August 30, 2016, 08:04:32 PMMake sure you completely understand the reasons behind what you want to do before acting.
Quote from: Dudeman on August 30, 2016, 08:18:10 PMAbove all, fall in love with a person and not with a body.
Quote from: Ruto on August 31, 2016, 08:16:33 PMI found this love columnist recently and the advice is gold.
Here's the tag for all his articles: http://kotaku.com/tag/ask-dr-nerdlove
This one column lol: http://kotaku.com/ask-dr-nerdlove-my-crush-keeps-betraying-my-christian-1782916675
Some of the stuff is NSFW and also 18+ so don't blame me if you click on something out of *curiosity*
Let he with two hands cast the first stone. I should not of laughed that much.
Kman is my bff guys
When my last relationship ended (January) I basically gave up on dating anyone (mostly because everyone cheated on me), but now I've started to think that there might be some chemistry between me and a certain person I've only talked to online. The biggest issue I have here is that she is my sister's best friend. I don't know if I should pursue this or not.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on September 15, 2016, 06:55:23 AMWhen my last relationship ended (January) I basically gave up on dating anyone (mostly because everyone cheated on me), but now I've started to think that there might be some chemistry between me and a certain person I've only talked to online. The biggest issue I have here is that she is my sister's best friend. I don't know if I should pursue this or not.
I got myself into a possessive and demanding relationship because I jumped in too fast. Fortunately, this isn't your first rodeo but from my experience, my piece of helpful advice to you is take plenty of time to observe her mannerisms, how she treats others around her, her social circumstance, etc. Don't stalk her, but just be aware. Also, this all should be done before you even admit to yourself you may like her if you were to ask me. Maybe this is helpful to you, maybe not, but that's what I have to offer.
What exactly do you mean by her social circumstance?
Also my main concern is that I'm not sure how dating her (if I decide to try) will affect my relationship with my sister or my sister's relationship with her. This is kind of an odd situation I've found myself in that I've never experienced before. Also like I said I've only ever talked to this person online so I don't know how I'd go about finding out how she treats other people.
It's not awkward (source: being friends with my sister's boyfriends)
Yeah no I don't expect it would be awkward. If anything it could be advantageous if something like this is your goal:
Quote from: Latios212 on September 04, 2016, 12:57:43 PMa relationship... [in which] both parties are comfortable with the idea of spending [lifespan] with each other.
It would be good that she gets along already with your family.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on September 15, 2016, 11:59:28 AMWhat exactly do you mean by her social circumstance?
Also my main concern is that I'm not sure how dating her (if I decide to try) will affect my relationship with my sister or my sister's relationship with her. This is kind of an odd situation I've found myself in that I've never experienced before. Also like I said I've only ever talked to this person online so I don't know how I'd go about finding out how she treats other people.
Social circumstance is what I said when I was thinking back to my own experience cuz in my case, my ex had like, no friends besides me. Which inevitably made me her whole life, yadda yadda yadda. But you're in a great spot I think cuz if you want to get to know her better, just get your sister to drag you with them when they do things every so often. Get some exposure (please don't misinterpret that X( ). Having a sibling already in the in is a lucky place to be.
Getting some exposure (as you so chose to word it) is not so easy when your sister is currently living in Tennessee and your currently attending college in central Alabama
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on September 15, 2016, 04:18:42 PMGetting some exposure (as you so chose to word it) is not so easy when your sister is currently living in Tennessee and your currently attending college in central Alabama
Ah. Yep well forget that idea then. Scratch it.
Scratch that.Also, I didn't "choose" to word it like that. It's just what came to my mind first.
Apply as much as is applicable then. Ultimately it's all your judgement calls and your actions, your life so take whatever from this as you want.
I've got another really lengthy and meaningless-drama filled story if anyone wants to hop in tinychat and listen to me rant/whine
Sorry :(
it's okay a good crowd showed up and i let most of it out :-) maybe stay tuned for a part 2 or a conclusion in this thread who knows
That moment when you realize you've been crushing on a boy the past month and a half
omg yes tell me more
Soon. I'm going to see him now and will report back with the cuteness
much excite
hell yeah report back
give us dem deets
As it turns out, he's been crushing on me for the past school year so ye.
Currently we're fwbs because both of us are horrible with comitting to relationships
Did you know he was gay/bi/whatever before hand? That's pretty cool I'm jealous and happy for you!
Quote from: FireArrow on September 18, 2016, 07:03:07 PMDid you know he was gay/bi/whatever before hand? That's pretty cool I'm jealous and happy for you!
THIS like I'm happy America is at a place where gay kids can have relationships but I'm also angry that wasn't the case when I was in school just a few years ago 😭
This whole conversation is really building up my rage, I should probably stop looking at this for a while.
another win for the gay agenda
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on September 18, 2016, 06:36:32 PMAs it turns out, he's been crushing on me for the past school year so ye.
Currently we're fwbs because both of us are horrible with comitting to relationships
hey congrats either way! :D i'm happy for you!
See the gays are out to get us and undermine our nation built up on family values
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on September 18, 2016, 07:12:40 PMThis whole conversation is really building up my rage, I should probably stop looking at this for a while.
What, do two gay teens having a consensual relationship bother you? lol
Quote from: FireArrow on September 18, 2016, 07:03:07 PMDid you know he was gay/bi/whatever before hand? That's pretty cool I'm jealous and happy for you!
I did, yeah. I hadn't thought he would have even noticed or payed attention to me though, so happy day.
Long live the gay agenda.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on September 18, 2016, 07:05:17 PMTHIS like I'm happy America is at a place where gay kids can have relationships but I'm also angry that wasn't the case when I was in school just a few years ago 😭
I'm still in school and it's not like this where I live :c
Oregon here I come~
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on September 18, 2016, 07:44:57 PMI did, yeah. I hadn't thought he would have even noticed or payed attention to me though, so happy day.
Niceeeeeeeee
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on September 18, 2016, 07:12:40 PMThis whole conversation is really building up my rage, I should probably stop looking at this for a while.
No, I think you should stare at it longer.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 18, 2016, 07:23:18 PMSee the gays are out to get us and undermine our nation built up on family values
It's already too late.
Yeah to be fair Oregon is pretty liberal and I go to a performing arts based high school that's even more liberal
Quote from: FireArrow on September 18, 2016, 08:14:58 PMNo, I think you should stare at it longer.
Haha, if me being bi bothers him, that's his issue, not mine.
Maybe a year ago I would've gotten mad but after my transformative emo period I just don't care
Nihilism, kids
Nihilism has no value
see what I did there
Yes, you're very smart. Now shut up.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on September 18, 2016, 07:12:40 PMThis whole conversation is really building up my rage, I should probably stop looking at this for a while.
You know, this statement isn't necessary. If you don't like it don't read it.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 18, 2016, 08:29:28 PMYes, you're very smart. Now shut up.
That's just like, your opinion man.
Noc I really don't know what your problem with PDS is, he's a cool guy. Like you'd be 10x more justified in constantly picking on me.
I appreciate it but let's not have another murder break out over my sexuality
I don't think his issue is with your sexuality but finnnneeeeeeeee
Uh, I was quoting the princess bride
I thought he was actually pretty clever there
so derailing this
I'm thinking of proposing to my girlfriend soon. How much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 18, 2016, 09:14:09 PMUh, I was quoting the princess bride
I thought he was actually pretty clever there
I got you man, sorry I couldn't show up earlier to defend it
Oh, sorry.
Quote from: Dudeman on September 18, 2016, 09:30:25 PMI got you man, sorry I couldn't show up earlier to defend it
I knew you'd get it which is why I didn't even consider someone taking it seriously
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 18, 2016, 09:27:26 PMso derailing this
I'm thinking of proposing to my girlfriend soon. How much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
sorry knight I'll bring you back up because you're important
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 18, 2016, 08:29:28 PMYes, you're very smart. Now shut up.
I interpreted this as a joke and laughed actually so I feel like all is well
My bad, I didn't see the joke. Sorry :-[
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 18, 2016, 09:27:26 PMI'm thinking of proposing to my girlfriend soon. How much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
How exciting, bro!
I honestly don't really know the price of an engagement ring, nor would I know how to
get a good deal. So I can't help you there. :P
I am really excited for you though. I hope you'll have the words to say!
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 18, 2016, 09:27:26 PMso derailing this
I'm thinking of proposing to my girlfriend soon. How much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
oh my GOD!! I just got so hype and I don't even know your relationship like that but CONGRATSSS!!!!
average cost: most likely expensive af
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 18, 2016, 09:27:26 PMso derailing this
I'm thinking of proposing to my girlfriend soon. How much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
Just get an onion ring, and everyone wins!::) jk, but I dunno about prices for that.
I can't be serious, sned hlep.
There's cheap ones that you can get for maybe $25, but... I would not go for that, not sure if the quality is too good. There's a pretty wide range of prices, from around about a hundred up into the ten thousands.
The trick is it doesn't need to be expensive. I've heard back in the day someone used a leather band as the engagement ring because they couldn't afford a ring. Generally what I'd be more worried about is how pretty it looks. If you are gonna propose to her congrats and good luck. She's not going to ask you how much you paid on the ring either so you can keep it on the cheap end if cost is an issue. It doesn't even need to be a diamond ring either. My sister says she'd prefer just a solid like silver or something so really you've got a lot of leeway for what you think she would think is pretty while still being cost effective. If expensive isn't your main concern, then more power to you you've got a lot of options. My sister also says a huge factor in price is where you buy it, so if you can't afford it look somewhere else for something similar.
Quote from: Bubbles on September 17, 2016, 11:03:15 PMit's okay a good crowd showed up and i let most of it out :-) maybe stay tuned for a part 2 or a conclusion in this thread who knows
conclusion coming up
I'm officially his Supportive Female Friend (aka wingwoman) and I'm helping him get this other girl. Everyone's telling me he's just an ass and to drop him but if I can give him advice to help him be happy I'm not gonna be petty and pout I'll help him out
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 19, 2016, 04:04:09 PMThe trick is it doesn't need to be expensive. I've heard back in the day someone used a leather band as the engagement ring because they couldn't afford a ring. Generally what I'd be more worried about is how pretty it looks. If you are gonna propose to her congrats and good luck. She's not going to ask you how much you paid on the ring either so you can keep it on the cheap end if cost is an issue. It doesn't even need to be a diamond ring either. My sister says she'd prefer just a solid like silver or something so really you've got a lot of leeway for what you think she would think is pretty while still being cost effective. If expensive isn't your main concern, then more power to you you've got a lot of options. My sister also says a huge factor in price is where you buy it, so if you can't afford it look somewhere else for something similar.
TL;DR, If you think she would like it, it's a good engagement ring. Whether that means it's a precious metal or just looks nice. If it's obvious you put thought into it, that's probably enough for anybody that special.
Quote from: Bubbles on September 19, 2016, 04:59:21 PMconclusion coming up
I'm officially his Supportive Female Friend (aka wingwoman) and I'm helping him get this other girl. Everyone's telling me he's just an ass and to drop him but if I can give him advice to help him be happy I'm not gonna be petty and pout I'll help him out
I wish I could be chattin
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 19, 2016, 05:13:04 PMI wish I could be chattin
I'm there rn if you want a real quick run down
edit: nvm my wifi is acting up i can't keep a signal :c sorry
Quote from: Bubbles on September 19, 2016, 04:59:21 PMconclusion coming up
I'm officially his Supportive Female Friend (aka wingwoman) and I'm helping him get this other girl. Everyone's telling me he's just an ass and to drop him but if I can give him advice to help him be happy I'm not gonna be petty and pout I'll help him out
he is an ass tbh for playing u, but I guess you're being the bigger person by still being his friend.
Quote from: K-NiGhT on September 18, 2016, 09:27:26 PMHow much do you guys think is the average cost of an engagement ring?
A decent one would set you back ~$1200 (estimate based on what people on my facebook mark as their favorite rings---gag). But remember rings in general suck, especially if you have to wear gloves for work. If that's the case, don't spend *that* much. I hate jewelry in general but like art, so I really can't say much more. I heard about couples ring shopping together but I'm not sure if that would work out for you.
Geez, people talking about getting married already and here I am making my dream guy(s?) in the Sims and using the CAS generator to see what the offspring would look like. Relationships are otherwise ok
My ex-fiance, don't judge me, only spent $50. While I wasn't upset by this initially I think in a way I was upset he wasn't willing to get me something nicer, better quality. It wasn't like he didn't have the money or spend more than that on a video game regularly. Maybe I'm shallow, but that's my perspective.
Don't hate okay, I still loved my ring. :(
And no that's not why we broke up nor did it bother me THAT much. It was just kind of a thought in the back of my mind. Anyway, that's my 2 cents worth.
That's what I'm trying to get at. If she appreciates it, it certainly doesn't have to be $1000. It just has to show her what she means to you.
In the same vein as PDS, but different, I've got a crush on a girl for the first time in a couple years. She's in my piano studio and she keeps telling my friend that I'm the cutest guy in the college's music department and she's super into me. I finally worked up the nerve to talk to her today and now we and a mutual friend are having dinner together tonight??? Let's see how this goes.
Btw this girl is beyond beautiful she's a transfer student from Korea and kinda tall and wears really quirky outfits and baseball caps and she's so nice you guys
But I've never done anything with a girl before. Let's find out how straight I actually am xD
I'm going to wish you good luck slow
Yesterday and today this girl in my history class gave me food, should I marry her
Spoiler
this is how you make people like me fall in love with you
Well, a lot happened at school today, and I really feel like talking about.
I don't want to be friends with one of my friends anymore because he's been constantly rude, not-caring, and frustrating and I don't want to deal with it anymore. Yesterday I was trying to show him something on my laptop, but my laptop wouldn't open anything and I was frustrated trying to get it to work. He's been asking if I wanted to see his "buddy" over the course of the past hour. I said no because the previous times, we were working, and right then I was trying to show him something. With me saying "no", he gets up and goes to get his "buddy". I finally get my laptop to start working and decide that I'm not going to show him the thing because he doesn't care. I then put my head down because I'm sad and angry. He comes back with a praying mantis in his hand (his "buddy") and seeing that I wasn't interested, he goes to a nearby table to get attention from others. It made me so angry that he chose to have attention over caring about why I was sad.
Then today, he acts like nothing happened. I had a donut that I was going to give to another one of my friends and when we cross paths. He reaches out as if I was giving the donut to him. I hate how he always assumes things. I ignored him all first hour, hoping he would see that somethings wrong and want to know why, but he doesn't. The day goes on and he still thinks nothing's wrong. I'm done being friends with a person who doesn't care about me.
On the more bright news, I also spent some time with another one of friends (the one who I had a crush on). I was going to give her a donut today, but she didn't want it, which is alright. I hung out with her at lunch, that was fun. The biggest thing that happened was during an assembly we had. We were expecting it to be an "anti-bullying" assembly, but it really was a "value" and "friendship" assembly. She was calling out for her friends to come sit next to her, although they did sit near us, they didn't seem to listen to her, so I sat next to her! At first, she didn't talk much, but as it got going, she started to open up much more. The assembly consisted of many small activities to do with your neighbor, and obviously I went with her. Later on, she started to choose to do things with me instead of trying with her other friends.
The assembly said that the people you should hang out with should be encouraging to you to do things and help you make the right choices, they should help you out and be there for you, and they should care about you. I feel, that this new friend does these better than the old friend and I'm really excited to hang out with her!
Sorry this was super long, this has been on my mind all day.
Part 2: Cool! 'Nuff said.
Part 1: Did you ever actually tell him how you felt? It seems like you were passively waiting for him to notice you. Of course while I have no idea who this person is, I can tell you from experience that it can be awfully easy sometimes to brush off someone inadvertently (and possible rudely) because your mind's somewhere else; it doesn't necessarily mean that he's disregarding you on purpose. Also some people are just thick-headed and you have to tell them explicitly what's up. If this person's really your friend, he should understand and work with you if you tell him how he's making you feel.
If people ever passive agressively try and make me confront them, I play dumb. There's absolutely no reason not to be honest and upfront about how you feel.
Guys in high school are generally very self centered and don't think about others. You have to let them know how you feel. Girls will usually notice the smallest things and you won't have to say as much.
Of course this is a huge generalization, but from what I've seen it's mostly correct in a lot of scenarios.
Life is tough, you'll have to work around other people and can't expect them to work around you. Sorry if this is sounding harsh, not meaning it that way.
Quote from: FireArrow on September 21, 2016, 08:06:48 PMIf people ever passive agressively try and make me confront them, I play dumb. There's absolutely no reason not to be honest and upfront about how you feel.
Pretty much same
I'm usually not very good at this "relationships" thing you speak of :P but know that I am always silently cheering you all on whenever I stop by this thread.
Personally, I find honesty to be so useful in any kind of relationship - even though it may hurt, it is often a better solution than keeping it all hidden away. (Not that I always manage to be honest, but I find that it helps resolve more serious conflicts)
I realize that telling him how I feel is the obvious solution, but I can't get myself to tell anybody how I feel. The people who I feel the most comfortable with I find hard to tell them. I don't really like to be sad or mad, so I try to stay happy all the time and whenever I have something to say, I don't want to sacrifice the happiness that was going on for that. But then again, I really need to tell people how I feel.
Quote from: braixen1264 on September 21, 2016, 09:03:00 PMGuys in high school are generally very self centered and don't think about others. You have to let them know how you feel. Girls will usually notice the smallest things and you won't have to say as much.
This is true.
Quote from: Latios212 on September 21, 2016, 07:19:33 PMit can be awfully easy sometimes to brush off someone inadvertently (and possible rudely) because your mind's somewhere else; it doesn't necessarily mean that he's disregarding you on purpose. Also some people are just thick-headed and you have to tell them explicitly what's up. If this person's really your friend, he should understand and work with you if you tell him how he's making you feel.
This is true too. If I were in his scenario, it's very possible that 1) I didn't notice I had upset you, and 2) if I saw you somewhat upset, I may or may not inquire further. Personally I more often than not tend to let people open themselves up to me first when they want to chat. I'm totally there and all ears when they need, but I won't butt myself into their lives if they don't necessarily want me to. That characteristic of mine can be good, and it can be bad. It's kinda similar what FA said:
Quote from: FireArrow on September 21, 2016, 08:06:48 PMIf people ever passive agressively try and make me confront them, I play dumb. There's absolutely no reason not to be honest and upfront about how you feel.
Passive agressiveness won't work very well on me because, similarly, I likely won't respond much to it if at all. If, on the other hand, you're more blunt and straightforward, I'll definitely do my best to help the issue.
Also, the fact that he went and tried to show you what excited him so much (his "buddy") seems to suggest to me that he still totally values you as a friend. Actually, it's possible he was hurt when you showed no interest in his interest. Could'a seemed like you didn't care about what he wanted to share. That being said, I wasn't there so I don't know how it played out exactly but based on your explanation, there's my spin on the scenario. I mean, it sucks when they don't seem into what you're trying to share/explain (this can happen by accident), but from personal experience it's worse when they share everything (literally everything) with others instead without any particular reason. If that happens, it will be blatantly obvious you're being ignored and that means that there's some friendship issue. But if he's still showing you things I would think that that means everything up to that point is fairly a-ok.
I find myself to be very different and pretty weird compared to other people. I'm quite obviously passive aggressive and I have a big problem with wanting to do something, but never doing it. I wanted to tell him, but I never found the motivation to do so, and one of the big key factors is probably due to me being told that high school friends don't last forever. I know I probably hurt him more since he considered me his "best friend", but I didn't see him in the same way, and I told him that several times. I'm very confusing when it comes to this stuff, when I appear to want to be left alone, I actually want to talk. I don't know why I'm like this, and I shouldn't expect him to know, so a lot of this is mostly my fault.
I think the reason I stopped being friends with him is because my view of how I want my friends to be has changed. I used to want only christian friends, then I opened up more and wanted lots of friends, then I wanted more female friends, and now I want less friends. Once again, I don't know why this is the way it is, but that's just how I'm feeling. :-\
Is your dad a republican
No, my dad doesn't like either.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on September 22, 2016, 03:26:16 PMIs your dad a republican
what does this have to do with anything
The "I only wanted christian friends" reeks of conservative upbringing if I were to take a guess.
XD that sounds like my parents. I mean, sure, I'm conservative, too, but I'm not xenophobic (unlike someone I live with) ::)
Quote from: FireArrow on September 22, 2016, 04:34:07 PMThe "I only wanted christian friends" reeks of conservative upbringing if I were to take a guess.
This was back in Texas where my only 2 friends were christian. Moving to Michigan, I wanted feel at home with christian friends and didn't really want trouble-makers for friends either. *Great, there's literally no way I can explain this without being offensive :P*
that's stupid. Your parents' political position has no bearing on you or your upbringing
I really hope you're being sarcastic.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 22, 2016, 04:54:36 PMthat's stupid. Your parents' political position has no bearing on you or your upbringing
Just like their religious beliefs don't, I take it?
any problems i had before are gone :-) tonight was such a great night i wanna do it all over again pls pls
<3
ok I am a lame weenie in need of help
I met a really cute boy at Symphony of the Goddesses, we exchanged Facebooks and well uh
I'm too damn nervous to send him a message. Like, with all we have in common I feel it should be easy to send him a message about Fire Emblem, or Zelda or what have you and oh my god why is it so hard
Sending a message about a cool video game thing shouldn't be hard but it is!!!! Please send help so I can talk to cute boy
"Hey what's up" then go from there
like honestly, yeah
there's no reason to be nervous in the slightest bit
U N L E S S Y O U ' R E A M U R D E R E R A N D Y O U ' R E W O R R I E D H E ' L L F I N D O U T ?
:( but what do i say...
Make a facebook post (share an article/pic) and wait for him to notice it.
Otherwise, "how's it going."
I posted a LoZ related thing on his wall this weekend, and he liked it, but uh. That's all that happened...
So he's seeing your posts, meaning you're not on his ignore list. Message him and talk about the article or weather.
First time I'm posting here, because I'm in a special situation right now!
So to get to the point, I think! ...that there's a girl that is in love with me (and I also like here really much). But I'm Really doubtful about it. She work at the same workplace as I do, DHL, and ever since she started working in a position closer to me she seems to have kind of been "scouting" on me. There has been other guys interested in her as well, but both seems to have "failed" by now. I think I have "succeeded" because I have great respect for her (and other women as well) in the sense that I don't try to "cheese" by pretending that I am someone I'm not (sometimes I even think I'm too honest and say clumsy things by that), for example I never try saying things like "oh, I have a fantastic apartment and make a lot of money" or "I really like exactly the same things you do, definitely not lying about that or anything". But I called one of the guys up and ask about the case and he said she already got a boyfriend, so I'm really not sure. I'm even more so, not sure how much she likes me, she seems to try to get closer to me but very slowly step-by-step but I'm not sure if it's true or if it's just me being "egocentric" thinking that "everything revolves around me, so much stuff is happening - and I must be the cause of it". I really hope she loves me and wants to live together with me, but I can't decide that and I want her to come to me and not me asking her out or something. She's really special and everything and seems to be the first one who've cared a lot for me (if it's true) and I don't want to "miss the chance" and be single like forever sitting there in the corner, so that's why I care. Anyhow I just wanted to went out my tough emotions that's been bothering me throughout months or so. And if you, the girl I'm talking about sees this and cares, please give me a clear answer, tired of living in this confusion. :-\
Here's a pro tip for any relationship or pre-relationship situation such as yours:
TALK TO HER.
Always, always, always make communication the most important thing when first thinking about starting a relationship. Never go off of feelings or assumptions. Never assume how the other person perceives you. If you don't talk, you'll never get anywhere.
In any sort of relationship, be it professional, platonic, romantic, whatever, communication is key.
I really like your tip Dudeman and it's something I've been thinking of myself. But she's kind of she and careful so I don't want to jump to actions. But maybe you're right, maybe I have to the case at hand and ask her about it.
btw thanks for responding guys. :)
Ask her out on a date
+1 to what dudeman has said
Oh yea also the cute boy that I mentioned several pages back is now dating me so ye
Wooo congrats!
Man I've had this weird intrigue thing going on at my workplace, and it doesn't seem to be over or even end, lol, it's really bothering me. It's connected to me previous post about "the girl" who I thought was interested in me.
So... to get to the point:
There are like 3 or 4 people, I call myself T, the second person A and the third M, and maybe there's a fourth which I'd call S, and also there's "the girl" which I'd call G.. for girl.
So apparently both T, A think that the G likes us both, and there is also M who likes G but I'm not so sure about how much she likes him. T and A are kind of opposite. T is kind of social, a bit crazy an weird person at times, but probably look calm, kind and charismatic on the outside (cause I don't want to be in people's face and "mess things up", and I know that I sometimes goes too far or just is too social or extrovert). And A is kind of the opposite, normal but not too normal, a bit sneaky which you don't expect from him, but otherwise very calm and careful, although I do think (and know) that he can get pretty emotional at times. And M is pretty greedy and power-hungry and not that afraid of showing it, cares about gold, women, sex, power etc. (with a small grin on his face). And S could already be G's boyfriend but I think he's more her "bodyguard" and a close and trustworthy friend rather than her boyfriend, maybe even a relative.
While A and M try to kind of sneaky and all (especially A), I'm more the opposite trying to be really honest (maybe even too honest) and open. It's probably because of our personality, I'm being more social and M being kind of social and A being more calm; I think, rather than "a strategy", but idk 100% honestly.
So that's how the situation is. And I really want to say that I want to try to care less about this whole situation. And care less about her, in the sense that I don't want to put all the focus on her in case that I "lose". I remember talking to my cousin who told me a wise tip - "to not pay too much focus on one girl, instead relax make good friends and let "love come to you", that sometimes it'll just click". And I'll try follow that and just chill out, mind my own business, play some piano, enjoy Christmas, have fun with my friends and family etc. And not let me bother myself with all this drama, it making me confused and really annoyed. I also got a lot of work during the winter and I actually don't even have the energy to care so much about this, as I got to focus on 1) work and 2) Christmas stuff. So y.. that's how my situation is. And I really like the tips you gave me about "conversation" and "ask her out", but I personally think it's a better idea to lay low and be myself rather than going straight to the point, feel like that is too disrespectful and just too bold, a better idea is just to try being a bit social and nice and all maybe something might happen.
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on December 10, 2016, 01:09:55 PM+1 to what dudeman has said
Oh yea also the cute boy that I mentioned several pages back is now dating me so ye
LOL, my theory about there being a trillion gay people here (or whatever I said in my old comment) seem to be more true as time passes by. My ass Slow, that there are like 5% of people who identify as "not straight". Don't know where that number makes sense, but here it's more like 50%, guessing that aesthetic areas "attract" more gay people, or even makes people more gay, lol. (...too bad for me, lol. :-\)
are...you even real?
remember kids the aesthetic makes u gay, u heard it here
You're experiencing that thing where you notice the gay people and not the straight because the straight is "normal." Like how you never notice when you're healthy, only when you're sick. The fact is that less than 2% of the population (and that's just the US, one of the most gay-friendly nations) identify as nonstraight. If 50% of people were gay, the amount of births would plummet drastically because only half of the population would be compelled to reproduce. I'm not crying about it, I'm just literally stating facts that gay people are a minority.
Also I feel like I shouldn't even get into this but "living in aesthetic areas turns you gay (too bad for me :-\)" isn't very nice
Tobbeh, that's such a ludicrous argument that it shows you have no idea how the real world works and you have a tendency to project your admittedly narrow worldview as widely accepted fact. It's not a matter of self expression, but rather one of tact and taste in your stated beliefs.
Maybe because of the anonymousity online more people are able to come out of the closet and say stuff.
Like most people I know irl probably think I'm straight.
Idk
The rumor come out: Does aesthetic makes gay?
Aesthetic makes gay is the most discussed in the media in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2010, but some of the public still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about the gay. At that time it became the massive social networking rumor. The public, especially the fans are shocked. It just came out with the bad rumor which is spread massively. This time is not about Macintosh, but they bad rumor. The rumor is out of standardize of hoax, according the last reported this aesthetic revealed it as homosexual. Do you still believe or not, this rumor is really much talked by people even in a person of its fans.
Quality journalism
Funny how people cared most about the thing I cared about least, in my post, and wrote less about in my post.
Quote from: Dude on December 10, 2016, 03:23:08 PMMaybe because of the anonymousity online more people are able to come out of the closet and say stuff.
Like most people I know irl probably think I'm straight.
Idk
Dude, sometimes you make A Lot of sense, like really A LOT!
About "Aesthetic makes you gay". My idea was that "the environment" you're inside in shapes who you are. And thought that Aesthetic subjects (music, theater, dance etc) are a lot about emotions -> being "emotional" and expressing emotions is somewhat more or the less seen as feminine -> so if you're in an aesthetic environment you'll be affected more or the less by it -> so if you're a man you might get more feminine -> and also therefore more gay. But y, it's ... very far-fetched, and also doesn't apply to girls, as it should be the opposite, being in a manly environment makes them more lesbian (gay). But that's was my idea - that the environment shapes you, so if you're in a "manly environment" you might get affected by it and get more manly, and if you're in a feminine environment you might get more feminine. But it's a debate in it's own whether you see aesthetic environments as feminine or masculine.
Also really didn't want to start a crazy debate about it AS my BIG POINT I wanted to make was to express my feelings about the crazy intrigue-esque situations I've sort of in!
While I understand what you're saying, that doesn't have any corrolation with sexual orientation. It just means you're more in tune with your emotions.
please stop talking
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on December 10, 2016, 03:51:39 PMDude, sometimes you make A Lot of sense, like really A LOT!
please don't lump me in with your kind
That's great and all but the whole "gays are feminine" is made up by straight people.
I agree with tobbeh, this forum makes me super gay
thanks shadowkirby
So is the "all lesbians are butch" nonsense.
Quote from: Sebastian on December 10, 2016, 03:12:50 PMDebatable.
No. >:/ This isn't The Debate Topic.
Quote from: Yug_Guy on December 10, 2016, 03:33:14 PMThe rumor come out: Does aesthetic makes gay?
Aesthetic makes gay is the most discussed in the media in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2010, but some of the public still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about the gay. At that time it became the massive social networking rumor. The public, especially the fans are shocked. It just came out with the bad rumor which is spread massively. This time is not about Macintosh, but they bad rumor. The rumor is out of standardize of hoax, according the last reported this aesthetic revealed it as homosexual. Do you still believe or not, this rumor is really much talked by people even in a person of its fans.
Quality journalism
*cringes* AUGHHHH, NO, THIS JOURNALISM IS TOO HIGH QUALITY
Quote from: Yug_Guy on December 10, 2016, 03:33:14 PMThe rumor come out: Does aesthetic makes gay?
Aesthetic makes gay is the most discussed in the media in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2010, but some of the public still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about the gay. At that time it became the massive social networking rumor. The public, especially the fans are shocked. It just came out with the bad rumor which is spread massively. This time is not about Macintosh, but they bad rumor. The rumor is out of standardize of hoax, according the last reported this aesthetic revealed it as homosexual. Do you still believe or not, this rumor is really much talked by people even in a person of its fans.
Quality journalism
i come back from my unanticipated hiatus just to check my fav thread and its filled with all this :c cmon guys this thread is for the mushy cute romancy stuff!!
we're all nerds we don't have mushy romance
So that cute guy I was talking about earlier this semester and I were the only two people to show up to class on thursday. I tried talking to him at the end of the class but he made a pretty clear effort to not let the conversation keep going.
I met a cute dude who works at a bakery in town and there's some mutual interest
you guys he's not a stereotypical gay I'm so excited
omg yes
but he works at a bakery
He actually looks kinda like you noc
And he's got nice arms :-)
okay okay my turn
edit: so apparently if you complain to everyone and their mother on virtually every platform you can you'll get an answer :/ idk how to feel but whatever
I hate it when people do this and delete their original post but sorry!!! I was emotional then and I'm emotional now soo I'll do this just this once
uh that's weird. His either a dick or just really socially awkward and I'm gonna guess the latter. Or something important came up idk
No he's highkey a dick and I recognized it when we were together but he was nothing but nice to me, and also I'm kinda attracted to dicks (no pun intended) so...I kinda continuously set myself up for things like this
Quote from: SlowPokemon on December 10, 2016, 08:34:56 PMAnd he's got nice arms :-)
I wouldn't be surprised, considering he works at a bakery
Quote from: Bubbles on December 10, 2016, 08:52:04 PMNo he's highkey a dick and I recognized it when we were together but he was nothing but nice to me, and also I'm kinda attracted to dicks (no pun intended) so...I kinda continuously set myself up for things like this
Aww. Well you seem to be taking it well enough at least. I've only been screwed over like that once and it took me ~6 months to recover.
Most probably already know that I'm not interested in getting into a relationship anytime soon, but I can't help but wonder if I'll ever find someone that's alright with my genderfluidity.
I'm sure you will!! I don't doubt it at all.
I've had... no luck in the romance department. rip.
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on December 10, 2016, 02:30:41 PMMan I've had this weird intrigue thing going on at my workplace, and it doesn't seem to be over or even end, lol, it's really bothering me. It's connected to me previous post about "the girl" who I thought was interested in me.
So... to get to the point:
There are like 3 or 4 people, I call myself T, the second person A and the third M, and maybe there's a fourth which I'd call S, and also there's "the girl" which I'd call G.. for girl.
So apparently both T, A think that the G likes us both, and there is also M who likes G but I'm not so sure about how much she likes him. T and A are kind of opposite. T is kind of social, a bit crazy an weird person at times, but probably look calm, kind and charismatic on the outside (cause I don't want to be in people's face and "mess things up", and I know that I sometimes goes too far or just is too social or extrovert). And A is kind of the opposite, normal but not too normal, a bit sneaky which you don't expect from him, but otherwise very calm and careful, although I do think (and know) that he can get pretty emotional at times. And M is pretty greedy and power-hungry and not that afraid of showing it, cares about gold, women, sex, power etc. (with a small grin on his face). And S could already be G's boyfriend but I think he's more her "bodyguard" and a close and trustworthy friend rather than her boyfriend, maybe even a relative.
While A and M try to kind of sneaky and all (especially A), I'm more the opposite trying to be really honest (maybe even too honest) and open. It's probably because of our personality, I'm being more social and M being kind of social and A being more calm; I think, rather than "a strategy", but idk 100% honestly.
So that's how the situation is. And I really want to say that I want to try to care less about this whole situation. And care less about her, in the sense that I don't want to put all the focus on her in case that I "lose". I remember talking to my cousin who told me a wise tip - "to not pay too much focus on one girl, instead relax make good friends and let "love come to you", that sometimes it'll just click". And I'll try follow that and just chill out, mind my own business, play some piano, enjoy Christmas, have fun with my friends and family etc. And not let me bother myself with all this drama, it making me confused and really annoyed. I also got a lot of work during the winter and I actually don't even have the energy to care so much about this, as I got to focus on 1) work and 2) Christmas stuff. So y.. that's how my situation is. And I really like the tips you gave me about "conversation" and "ask her out", but I personally think it's a better idea to lay low and be myself rather than going straight to the point, feel like that is too disrespectful and just too bold, a better idea is just to try being a bit social and nice and all maybe something might happen.
So this girl, G, is really cute and kind of shy, but also kind of fun and also kind of tough. Really "in the middle" girl, as I see her, or maybe "cute on the outside, tough on the inside".
Do you guys feel like I could "win"? :P ;D
Don't make love a competition, you're missing the point if you do that.
Lol I actually hate this exact "competition". :P
There's no competition. Don't make a relationship with anyone into a game that you need to win.
Quote from: Bubbles on December 11, 2016, 12:26:00 PMThere's no competition. Don't make a relationship with anyone into a game that you need to win.
Wise words. But easier said than done, since the girl is a "really special girl" and I've seen few girls like her.
look man relationships aren't about getting the girl it's about becoming closer with people. If you like her, ask her on a date. If she says no, you can try again in a couple months or just drop it. It's not difficult.
Maybe you're right Noc. Idk, my life is/feels kind of complicated. ::) :-\
MAN JUST ASK HER TO GO ICE SKATING WITH YOU THIS FRIDAY NIGHT
You're not trying to win a prize. There's not even some part of it to universally be called "successful." It's a relationship; it develops forever. You're not doing yourself any favors by dancing around the subject and trying to "outmaneuver" other people. Just make it as simple as asking her out. If she says yes, good for you. If she says no, you're not lost in some "what if" fantasy. That's all you have to do. And if you feel like you need to take some time to figure out whether you're interested in her before asking, take that time. But once you start trying to make her like you, you're going down a dangerous path.
Ninja'd: I can confirm that ice skating makes a really good date.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on December 11, 2016, 01:47:56 PMlook man relationships aren't about getting the girl it's about becoming closer with people. If you like her, ask her on a date. If she says no, you can try again in a couple months or just drop it. It's not difficult.
This is the smartest thing anyone's ever said in this thread
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on December 11, 2016, 02:06:15 PMMAN JUST ASK HER TO GO ICE SKATING WITH YOU THIS FRIDAY NIGHT
Quote from: Zunawe on December 11, 2016, 02:13:30 PMYou're not trying to win a prize. There's not even some part of it to universally be called "successful." It's a relationship; it develops forever. You're not doing yourself any favors by dancing around the subject and trying to "outmaneuver" other people. Just make it as simple as asking her out. If she says yes, good for you. If she says no, you're not lost in some "what if" fantasy. That's all you have to do. And if you feel like you need to take some time to figure out whether you're interested in her before asking, take that time. But once you start trying to make her like you, you're going down a dangerous path.
Ninja'd: I can confirm that ice skating makes a really good date.
So chill out Noc. The way I'm going with this is that I'll probably try socializing with her more, I mean we work at the same workplace, and probably also with other people involved so that it's more a relaxed situation rather than "Now it's only you and me" situation. And then maybe she'll like me more and want to know me more and want to in the end build a relationship with me, or maybe not and she'll say something along the lines of "you're ok, but not the one I'm particularly interested in" and I'm actually fine with that even though it's a pretty hard blow. And Zun, obviously I thought this through and come to the point that she'll have to "decide" (by time, not immediately), and if she likes me most of all people then I'm super-happy and also super-lucky! Bu if she doesn't loves me the most, I'd just have to accept it, take a really deep breath and say to myself "this is really really sad, but Tobbe, there might be some other really good super-special girl like her out there, or maybe someone you'll truly love in some way or the other who'll love you in the same way you do, so Don't give up, when you miss the first buss be patient and wait for the second one to come and it will hopefully come to you and be as awesome as the first one". So y, it's a tough spot for me, mentally, to be in atm, Zun and other people and I hope you understand it. But to help myself, I'll try be as normal as posible and to not get into all this too much, and instead focus on other things like "all the work I got at my job atm (Christmas time=more job)", and "having great time with families and friends, I mean it's Christmas Time now - best time of the year! :)", and "just chilling out for own personal, and others as well's, best." :)
Quote from: Zunawe on December 11, 2016, 02:13:30 PMYou're not trying to win a prize. There's not even some part of it to universally be called "successful." It's a relationship; it develops forever. You're not doing yourself any favors by dancing around the subject and trying to "outmaneuver" other people. Just make it as simple as asking her out. If she says yes, good for you. If she says no, you're not lost in some "what if" fantasy. That's all you have to do. And if you feel like you need to take some time to figure out whether you're interested in her before asking, take that time. But once you start trying to make her like you, you're going down a dangerous path.
Ninja'd: I can confirm that ice skating makes a really good date.
Borrowing off this - you cannot force anyone to like you. Relationships and people do not work that way. You shouldn't trying to manipulate yourself to seem more presentable over other people to try and land a date.
Quote from: Nebbles on December 11, 2016, 02:39:01 PMBorrowing off this - you cannot force anyone to like you. Relationships and people do not work that way. You shouldn't trying to manipulate yourself to seem more presentable over other people to try and land a date.
Lol have you guys ever listened to what I've said!? Obviously I'm trying to just chill out and be myself, and trying to ignore this stuff......... we'll see how many time I'll have to repeat myself (maybe as many as the mods consider it to be spam, lol :P ;D)
Your post being marked as spam is far more likely than these guy's words of advice making it through your thick skull.
We'll see ShadowKirby, we'll see! :P :D :)
Let's set that aside for now and talk about some real problems, shall we?
So I want a partner in life and I'm sexually attracted to guys, but the idea of sex scares me. Is that something that's... bad?? Like I get nervous thinking about it and kinda think it'd be a bad idea but.. I love dudes, man.
Hlp
There's definitely nothing wrong with it. Everyone feels different ways about having sex, and in your case, you could only feel comfortable about sex depending on the right person, perhaps? I can't say for certain since your own feelings are your own, but being nervous about sex is totally normal.
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.smbc-comics.com%2Fcomics%2F1479396784-20161117.png&hash=454b7d6414e16cba7c13656a822adc1a9be144fc)
I mean, yeah. Sex is something that's different for each and every person and it's hard not to feel scared or repulsed by the concept. It's especially confusing for non-straights (not that I want to get into anything about this) because the traditional "penis meets vagina" definition of sex is null and void when you have two men or two women. So it's almost like everyone, not just gays but pretty much everyone, has to decide for themselves what having sex actually means and what level of sexual contact they're comfortable with/enjoy.
But it's frightening me enough to the point of should I even look or not... I think it's mostly a fear of the unknown...
Just make sure you date someone who respects how you feel. Don't ever feel pressured to go into a relatioship with someone who won't.
I mean, those sort of thoughts are what lead me to discovering I was asexual. But since you said you still feel sexual attraction to men, you could just be nervous about the whole stigma of sex and the big deal that people seem to make of it. I know that seems awfully silly coming from me, but there's a lot of people who attach a lot of things to having sex that could really make people nervous that ARE willing, but thinking of all these like, things that people expect from it? Sorry if that didn't make sense - I am trying to help you out here.
In my opinion, and there are definitely different and valid viewpoints, sex is supposed to be fun. It's something intimate between two people that both people can enjoy in both a physical and emotional way. If you don't like it, or if the idea itself is unappealing, yay. Find another way to be happy with somebody you care about.
If we're talking about being nervous/cold feet/new territory, then I say you should give it a chance, but only with somebody you completely trust to respect how you feel about it. It's new and spooky to everybody at some point (to various degrees). A majority of people determine that it's not spooky after trying it. Of course, you are a bit of an edge case, Dude.
From my point of view, sex is not some taboo thing that only happens for specific reasons and specific ways. And it's easy to forget that subconsciously. If you're curious, talk about it with somebody you trust and are interested in doing something with. If they bring it up, explain your reservations and figure it out from there. But it's not like there's something wrong with being a little bit nervous or being uninterested or being grossed out or whatever.
To put it more eloquently: Do you, boo.
Edit: That last thing had at least one unintentional meaning.
Quote from: Zunawe on December 11, 2016, 09:44:11 PMEdit: That last thing had at least one unintentional meaning.
was just about to point this out lol
Quote from: SlowPokemon on December 10, 2016, 08:15:31 PMI met a cute dude who works at a bakery in town and there's some mutual interest
There's more than one Dude???
Still not as bad as that time I texted Kelsey "Let's hang dude" hoping to hang out with him
instead he screenshotted it and posted it on the forum
Quote from: shadowkirby on December 13, 2016, 02:19:05 AMStill not as bad as that time I texted Kelsey "Let's hang dude" hoping to hang out with him
instead he screenshotted it and posted it on the forum
wait what
Oh, the ever important comma.
I remember that
Sry to mess you up with more "crazy Tobbeh stories". But if this "stuff" going on at my work wasn't enough, there's also 1, or maybe even 2 girls whom I think also are interested in me! As I work full time I get to know and see a lot of people, and also some of the girls, as most work in the office rather than in the the factory. So y I think they both like me, 1 probably more than the other one. And, tbh, both looks kind of cute and especially the one whom I think likes me the most. But the thing is... they both seem too nice and kind imo, like "lalala everyday's a nice day lalalala", and maybe a bit too similar too me, maybe but idk. And they seem also to "try to get closer to me and getting some connection with me", which feels really cheezy tbh, like "thanks but... no". And the most important point why I'm not interested in any of them is: Because I already think there's a girl interested in, which I described in my previous comments (about the crazy situation)! And I think she's "better" in the sense that she's more unique since she's kind of tough but also good-looking (best of both worlds!). And I want to be in love with her, so if I cared more about the other girls I think she'd care less for me. But it's also annoying with this, I feel sort of like "the prince of the workplace", since I'm young and handsome (according to some of you guys at least), and that every girl wants me. Confusing situation to be in... to say the least.
oh my god just choose one and say "do you want to go on a date" this really isn't that hard
or just ask all of them on dates in subsequent weeks
still not hard
Quote from: Dudeman on December 13, 2016, 03:06:59 PMoh my god just choose one and say "do you want to go on a date" this really isn't that hard
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on December 13, 2016, 03:17:16 PMor just ask all of them on dates in subsequent weeks
still not hard
or you could all go together and try for the harem end
oh baby
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on December 13, 2016, 02:44:35 PMtobbehpost
My advice: sidechicks. Sidechicks everywhere.
Disclaimer: Any damage, physical, emotional, or otherwise, obtained from listening to this advice is officially not my fault.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on December 13, 2016, 03:48:55 PMMy advice: sidechicks. Sidechicks everywhere.
Disclaimer: Any damage, physical, emotional, or otherwise, obtained from listening to this advice is officially not my fault.
yes.
So, I've got some seriously good advice. Send the first one a dick pic. See how she reacts. If she likes it, she's a keeper. If not, send one to the second girl. Guaranteed to work.
...no
...yes
egg
no
If you two start this up again I swear to god I will lock this thread.
egg
Quote from: rulesNo spamming, trolling, creating unnecessary threads or polls, or otherwise post disruptive or obnoxious things.
Did you remember that weird situation I got at work where I thought there was a girl interested in me (but some other boys where interested in her), and then there came another girl (cause I work full time and get to see/know a lot of people) starting to get interested in me.
Well here's what I think about it now:
Girl 1: She's so "by herself" and maybe shy so I'm starting to not care about her. She's beautiful and special and everything, but if she doesn't care that much or doesn't seem interested in being with me, then I don't care. Also don't know if she's more interested in one of the other boys, they talk a bit, so maybe that's the case.
Girl 2: She's actually been really trying to be with me. Like very obviously. And she's cute and nice, but also kind of messy and "partygirl-y" kind of opposite to girl 1. And I thought girl 1 was interested in me so I didn't bother her much and acted very coldly towards her like "I'm only here to work, NOTHING else". And she apparently quit the job yesterday and also moved to Gothenburg to study (something). So there she went.
Girl 3: Well she's nice and quite but mostly hangs out with girl 2, don't care much for her.
So in the end there seem to be like 1,2 or maybe girls being interested in me, and some boys being interested in girl 1. And in the end, it seems like I didn't get any girl (and not girl 1), and no one else did get a girl, maybe 1 guy but otherwise - no. But I don't really care about the girl (girl 1) anymore. I've been trying to talk with her and contact her, but she doesn't seem to care much for me. And in that case it's not even worth trying or pretending that "there is something happening", because nothing is honestly happening!
Probably gonna try some dating sites or something in the future (so I don't end up single my entire life...). Thinking of making some stupid exaggerated profile, just for fun to see if anything happens XD.
Why is the concept of authenticity so foreign to you?
Why do you keep comparing women to each other like they're pieces of meat? You're not going to get dates if you keep doing that. Stop. Just hang out with them normally and see where things go.
Quote from: FireArrow on January 14, 2017, 09:59:22 AMWhy is the concept of authenticity so foreign to you?
What is even that?
Quote from: Nebbles on January 14, 2017, 12:24:36 PMWhy do you keep comparing women to each other like they're pieces of meat? You're not going to get dates if you keep doing that. Stop. Just hang out with them normally and see where things go.
Cause I want to live with one who I will want to live with for the rest of my life rather than just having a relationship for like a month or so and then after that having another relationship for like a month or 2 and not getting a stable one ever. And I'm very picky and perfectionistic when it comes to everything "quality before quantity", so I want to live with one who I can live with forever and not just stroll around and never finding anyone I care for.
By the Nebbles I don't think I'm the only one doing it, and not only that "it's a thing men do". I remember some film I saw on one of my french lessons which was about some girl hanging out with her friends. And in one episode they were at the beach talking about with of the boys that was best, and after a while they concluded that the very best would be if they like "combined them (their best characteristics)" into one person. So... y... guess some people just compare a lot...
Quote"Just hang out with them normally and see where things go."
Kind of smart idea. Might work.
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on January 14, 2017, 12:56:34 PMCause I want to live with one who I will want to live with for the rest of my life rather than just having a relationship for like a month or so and then after that having another relationship for like a month or 2 and not getting a stable one ever. And I'm very picky and perfectionistic when it comes to everything "quality before quantity", so I want to live with one who I can live with forever and not just stroll around and never finding anyone I care for.
Oh my god, these are human beings you're talking about. You are
never going to find a "perfect" woman, or a perfect anybody. If you're looking for the girl who ticks every box on your list, you are going to live a very lonely life. You're turning a relationship into a checklist. Stop that.
QuoteBy the Nebbles I don't think I'm the only one doing it, and not only that "it's a thing men do". I remember some film I saw on one of my french lessons which was about some girl hanging out with her friends. And in one episode they were at the beach talking about with of the boys that was best, and after a while they concluded that the very best would be if they like "combined them (their best characteristics)" into one person. So... y... guess some people just compare a lot...
THAT DOESN'T MAKE IT RIGHT WHAT THE FUCK
THAT IS ABSOLUTELY NOT OKAY SINCE OTHER PEOPLE DO IT
Comparing people like that is disgusting and insulting - I don't care WHO does it.
Tobbeh, I really want to like you, but these moments of disgustingly misogynistic shit give me a hard time doing that
when I saw PDS had posted I prepared to see a mildly off topic comment that did nothing but insult somebody, presumably tobbeh
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 14, 2017, 01:27:36 PMwhen I saw PDS had posted I prepared to see a mildly off topic comment that did nothing but insult somebody, presumably tobbeh
...people just don't understand me, or are too different from me. But idc, it's ok. I'm fine, at least I know myself.
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on January 14, 2017, 12:37:26 PMI'm not sure if people really think I'm the person I think I am (and I don't even really know or care who I am).
Do what now?
here's what you should do:
You've got a whole weekend to think about this. What kind of dates do you like? Ice skating, bowling, or an arcade are some good ideas. I know it seems scary, but pick one and on monday ask her if she'd like to go on a date with you. If she says yes, you be enthusiastic about it. Give her the day and time you'll pick her up. Have some conversations with her during the week, get to know her. There are a few tricks to living with someone forever. The first is effort. Whatever you want your spouse to be like, you need to realize that you should be trying to be that person too. Effort. Second, it's highly unlikely that you'll spend the rest of your life with this person, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't date them. Dating is a great opportunity to interact positively with the opposite sex. You might even have fun on a date, crazy as it seems. Also, I think girl number one sounds really fun, I'd ask her, but you're not me.
Don't make another big post in this thread until you've gone on a date, ok?
Just try to do this one thing to prove all the flapjacks in the thread wrong ok
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 14, 2017, 01:41:49 PMJust try to do this one thing to prove all the flapjacks in the thread wrong ok
lol what this is exactly what we're suggesting
stop making dumb comparison posts and just ASK ONE OF THEM OUT ALREADY
Noc... I'm not interested anymore in the girl I talked about, because of the obvious reason that she doesn't seem to care about me. If she really is interested in me, then she'll have to show it. And only time will tell if she is, but atm I say "no, I'm not interested".
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 14, 2017, 01:27:36 PMwhen I saw PDS had posted I prepared to see a mildly off topic comment that did nothing but insult somebody, presumably tobbeh
The least I could do in my free weekend <3
Then ask girl 3 since girl 2 moved away right
man, you're not even reading what i'm saying. Try to concentrate. You're not signing somw kind of contract by going on a date at all. Besides, asking someone on a date is a great way to tell if they're interested or not. I'm on my 3DS so it's difficult to get across what I'm thinking, but all you're doing right now is posting here and making excuses. You're not currently putting effort into making relationships. I don't want to sound mean, but you won't benefit from posting here anymore. Carpe Diem.
Also "she's not interested in me" is stupid logic. Women don't throw themselves at you (unless you're in an Axe commercial)
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 14, 2017, 01:55:46 PMYou're not currently putting effort into making relationships. I don't want to sound mean, but you won't benefit from posting here anymore.
Noc's absolutely correct. Listen to this.
okay i need advice!! i recently started like seriously talking to this one guy ( :-))) ) and we've known each other for a few months now but this only really started back up in the last week or so
so my birthday is this upcoming monday and as much as i'd want him to do something cute for me i also don't want to blindside him like its super short notice and almost not fair to tell him because that puts pressure like i'm expecting something big yknow
so basically should i tell him it's this monday or not?? like which is worse, putting the pressure on and expecting him to scramble and think of something, or mentioning it casually a week later and having him feel guilty for unintentionally skipping it??
ahhh and valentines day is in a few weeks too ffs guys watch your timing when you start up relationships god damn
well speaking as a guy whose girlfriend's birthday is tomorrow and I haven't gone out and bought anything (!!!) I think it's better if you tell him now rather than later
tell him but be subtle about letting him know what you expect from him.
"hey my birthday is next week, I thought maybe we could snuggle at my place and watch a dvd
I vote just be honest.
lol Valentine is soon!? WTF!? Crazy how things just... get's stumbled upon!
Quote from: FireArrow on January 23, 2017, 10:23:18 PMI vote just be honest.
But honest how?? Honest in that I'd tell him in advance or honest as in a week later or whenever it comes up be like "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to bother you or stress you out"?
Honestly I feel like while the second option seems kinda weak it's prob what I'm going to do :/
what's wrong with my advice :c
just tell him omg then maybe he'll do something nice
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 24, 2017, 02:10:56 PMwhat's wrong with my advice :c
because even tho we're probably at that level where i could totally ask that i'm still too weak to!! like i can't get myself to fully believe that we're a thing so i don't want to assume things and invite him over and have it be weird or something
okay realistically. either i'd do what i said in my last post, or i'd tell him something like "omg i'm so excited for this weekend my friend from highschool is coming because she wants to take me out for my birthday!!" and see how he reacts
this whole thing is just too stressful ugh like can i just not have a birthday this year
what do you want him to do though
honestly nothing? it'd be nice if he did something but i'm in no way expecting anything and i don't want to make it come across that way
Birthdays have an inherent quality of expectation, mentioning implies you want him to know and at the very least you want him involved. Not telling him, or telling him after the fact, may indicate that you aren't ready of willing to let him into your life like that. Of course, unless you were dropping hints about a month ago he may understand that you prefer smaller celebrations.
my trans friend with whom i am flirting is so cute i hope this goes somewhere
"down the drain" counts as somewhere, right?
@slow seduce em'
Quote from: Bubbles on January 24, 2017, 02:09:46 PMBut honest how?? Honest in that I'd tell him in advance or honest as in a week later or whenever it comes up be like "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to bother you or stress you out"?
Honestly I feel like while the second option seems kinda weak it's prob what I'm going to do :/
Idk how close your are to him so maybe this isn't the best advice, but just tell him what you're telling us.
Quote from: FireArrow on January 24, 2017, 05:12:41 PMIdk how close your are to him so maybe this isn't the best advice, but just tell him what you're telling us.
Me either honestly and that's kinda the problem :/ we're hanging out on thursday so if it comes up it comes up I guess
also slow i'm so happy for you c: good luck!!
I've achieved sexual flirtation this is going really well
That's awesome to hear! :D
So there's several people showing interest in me but it's one sided, what do I do
"No thanks, I'm not interested."
If problems persist, contact a legal professional.
Wait, what are we talking about?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on January 24, 2017, 07:51:12 PMI've achieved sexual flirtation this is going really well
And I just achieved like... nothing at all except like "losing myself" or something like that, or maybe not myself but probably other people "selves". ...
sucks tobbeh you
*clap clap*
ba-dum-tssh!
that was so well executed that I completely missed the joke the first time
Most of the girls in my school have never played Mega Man, Kirby, or Mario. The ones who have played Mario did it years ago when the Wii was popular during elementary school. The ones who have played Kirby played Kirby's Epic Yarn. I haven't met one that has played Mega Man. The only girls who have ever showed interest in me decide on a new gender/sexuality weekly, and it's hard to keep track. There was one guy who acted friendly towards me, but then revealed that he was gay. Maybe I should wait until college. :P
I will always recommend waiting until college, so there's my two cents. Any younger than that and you're dealing less with attractive personalities and more with raging hormones.
I always recommend never trying but I mean that's just me.
There's nothing wrong with dating in high school. I would say middle school is too early, but beyond that, dating is about figuring out what you want. While it's a bad idea to go into a relationship expecting it to end, that doesn't mean every relationship should be leading toward long-term stuff.
I mean yeah, don't feel like you have to date in high school. At the same time don't throw away any oppurtunities just because "I'm waiting till college."
--
Should I get a grindr y/n? My gay friend suggested it and I really want to but it kind of scares me and goes against my original plan of grin and bear it until I move somewhere with more gay folk.
I'll be willing to take opportunities, but I'll try not to be desperate. Some of my friends have really been that way. Now, nearly all of my friends are involved in relationships, and my best friend will barely tell me any details about his.
I've had three crushes in my life time:
1. 3rd-8th. A girl I liked because she was pretty. She's very athletic today, and doesn't seem to be interested in video games
2. 8th-10th. A girl I liked because she was pretty, smart, funny, shared some of my interests, and was talented. She rejected me because she wasn't ready to date, and thought I obsessed over video games too much. She's alone to this day, and reads her novels and pops in her earbuds whenever she can.
3. August-November 2016. A girl I liked because she was pretty, quiet, and lonely. She rejected me because she just broke up with her boyfriend from Missouri, and then got a new one 3 weeks after I was rejected. She missed 4 months of school, and recently got back. Her life is a mess; she has moved 13 times, because of her messed-up family situations. She also has tons of siblings to look after, and abusive parents to avoid.
Also, I should get a job before I date anyone. Those movies dug right into my life savings. :-\
Quote from: LeviR.star on January 25, 2017, 08:11:01 PM1. 3rd-8th. A girl I liked because she was pretty. She's very athletic today, which is not a quality that I share.
so?
this is the second time now you've indicated that you have to have whatever in common with someone in order to date. while yes it does help the long term stability of a relationship (generally speaking), 1) you dont need to care about that if youre still in high school like, at all, and 2) does it really matter
that muchsmh all y'all got no idea how to do relationships right lmao
A relationship with somebody athletic is always a positive. Even if they suck, the battle to be the fitter one oft turns you into a sexy man-beast (such as myself - I mean just look at those flippers).
I mean, being athletic is good, but wouldn't it make me look awfully pathetic if I wasn't? I don't live the healthiest lifestyle.
Please don't get me wrong, I have NOTHING against athletic people.
some of my best friends are athletes
Quote from: Altissimo on January 26, 2017, 04:27:36 AMsmh all y'all got no idea how to do relationships right lmao
That's kinda why I'm here, y'know.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on January 26, 2017, 06:01:07 AMsome of my best friends are athletes
That proves you can't hate athletes
I'm not athletist, but I'd never date an athlete
I don't plan on dating until college for practical reasons and haven't had a crush on anybody for a couple years now. I won't go out of my way to ask somebody out but if they approach me first and I'm somewhat interested I might go for it? I hope nobody does, though.
I think I've had a crush on the cutest girl ever since I went to prom with her
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on January 26, 2017, 06:49:05 AMThat proves you can't hate athletes
I'm not athletist, but I'd never date an athlete
I'm really thankful you share my sense of humor I thought it would go unnoticed
Again, not hating on athletes. Please understand this.
oh my god
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FU7Ghu2s.gif&hash=6eb9d51ac4cae5e29590c87a75fb48ce85902904)
can't tell if some people are too oblivious or others are just not funny...
I definitely fall into the oblivious category; I'll just go ahead and admit that :P
Quote from: Altissimo on January 26, 2017, 01:35:10 PMoh my god
Not directing this at you, Altissimo; just clearing up things for everyone.
After reading the past few posts, I can conclude that I have absolutely no idea what happened.
Quote from: Olimar12345 on January 26, 2017, 03:33:57 PMcan't tell if some people are too oblivious or others are just not funny...
A mix of both, I think.
Quote from: WaluigiTime64 on January 26, 2017, 04:36:38 PMAfter reading the past few posts, I can conclude that I have absolutely no idea what happened.
qft
Quote from: LeviR.star on January 26, 2017, 04:09:09 PMNot directing this at you, Altissimo; just clearing up things for everyone.
that wasn't my point but it's gone now so never mind lmao
wow you guys all ignored me for some dumb joke lawsuit incoming
Quote from: FireArrow on January 25, 2017, 07:27:48 PMI mean yeah, don't feel like you have to date in high school. At the same time don't throw away any oppurtunities just because "I'm waiting till college."
--
Should I get a grindr y/n? My gay friend suggested it and I really want to but it kind of scares me and goes against my original plan of grin and bear it until I move somewhere with more gay folk.
I didn't see this. I have it. But be prepared for a lot of weird and old people. And also no one on Grindr is looking for a date or relationship. It's 100% hook up culture and it's not spectacularly safe. But I've made friends with it too, so who knows. You've got nothing to lose.
I'm cool with hookups since I'm going off to college soon-ish anyways and I'm probably not ready for a relationship anyways. I like how you're the first person to tell it how it is rather than "omg just do it", so thanks.
Quote from: FireArrow on January 26, 2017, 07:49:58 PMI'm cool with hookups since I'm going off to college soon-ish anyways and I'm probably not ready for a relationship anyways.
Just make sure they're not an athlete.
Yeah, I hear those people really aren't a good fit for a date :U
yeah I just don't see a relationship with an athlete working out
Idk, just weight and see
im dying
You guys should all be ashamed of yourselves. Athlete or not, I'm sure whoever FA finds will work out.
Smh nocturne already used that
Look, if my reputation is going to be that all my jokes are stolen and all my memes are stale, I might as well live up to that expectation.
Well played, Dudeman. Well played.
I can attest, I'm an athlete and am not fit for a relationship. I couldn't think of anything else, RIP
an important part of it is finding a significant other who can lift you up not bring you down
It seems like a lot of girls in my school either hate everyone, hate themselves, or avoid contact with people in general. Mostly all the other girls are almost overly cheery. Being cheery's not a bad thing, but doesn't it go too far sometimes?
People at your age are the stage in life where they start wanting to make an impact. They're liable to express their feelings either too much or too little in an effort to fit in, make friends, be popular, etc. And yeah, being cheery can be a bad thing if you're trying to cover up your negative emotions, or if you're knowingly acting inappropriately to a situation. But there's nothing inherently wrong about having a positive attitude the majority of the time, provided it's legitimate positivity and not put on for show.
Quote from: Dudeman on February 03, 2017, 07:44:12 PMPeople at your age are the stage in life where they start wanting to make an impact. They're liable to express their feelings either too much or too little in an effort to fit in, make friends, be popular, etc. And yeah, being cheery can be a bad thing if you're trying to cover up your negative emotions, or if you're knowingly acting inappropriately to a situation. But there's nothing inherently wrong about having a positive attitude the majority of the time, provided it's legitimate positivity and not put on for show.
This is all really sound advice honestly
Quote from: Dudeman on February 03, 2017, 07:44:12 PMPeople at your age are the stage in life where they start wanting to make an impact. They're liable to express their feelings either too much or too little in an effort to fit in, make friends, be popular, etc. And yeah, being cheery can be a bad thing if you're trying to cover up your negative emotions, or if you're knowingly acting inappropriately to a situation. But there's nothing inherently wrong about having a positive attitude the majority of the time, provided it's legitimate positivity and not put on for show.
I second SlowPokemon's comment; this really helps, Dudeman. Thank you.
How do I deal with first date nerves so I can just be myself? ;-; and no he's not an athlete that wouldn't work out
edit: fk noc already took that one
whats with school age ppl here and generalizing ridiculous things about entire groups of people
Quote from: Altissimo on February 03, 2017, 09:15:05 PMwhats with school age ppl here and generalizing ridiculous things about entire groups of people
14-18 year olds are such smart groups of people what're you saying
No but in all seriousness I just celebrated 2 months with my boyfriend and I is very happy
Quote from: Altissimo on February 03, 2017, 09:15:05 PMwhats with school age ppl here and generalizing ridiculous things about entire groups of people
what's with non school age people here generalizing school age people
ooooooh
That didn't really make sense because she's not generalizing, she just pointed out that several school age people are generalizing
Quote from: Altissimo on February 03, 2017, 09:15:05 PMwhats with ppl everywhere and generalizing ridiculous things about entire groups of people
ftfy
i was trying to make a specific point about specific trends i've noticed but ok thx
My best buddy of 7 years has fallen in love with a girl. Whenever I try to talk to him about her, he will barely tell me anything. His friends tell me he's too shy. The girl seems nice, but now he seems to be on his phone whenever possible, talking to her. I feel like the dog of an owner who just got a girlfriend. He's one of my only good friends left. Advice?
Relationships are really personal. Don't try and make him tell you things if he doesn't want to.
I think it comes down to which one of you is willing to suck his dick
SK, that was uncalled for.
no it wasn't, don't edit my posts without my permission
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 06, 2017, 12:51:18 PMno it wasn't, don't edit my posts without my permission
??? What post?
I thought it was funny but I guess that makes me a bad guy XD
It was also, more likely than not, true. It's how it was when Kelsey got a girlfriend when we were 15.
Quote from: Dudeman on February 06, 2017, 12:48:50 PMSK, that was uncalled for.
It wasn't that bad, and Idk if it was
that much of a problem.
I was just reminded of the best love story ever:
Spoiler
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi2.kym-cdn.com%2Fphotos%2Fimages%2Foriginal%2F000%2F954%2F142%2F202.png&hash=d5edc7ab8cce130ba13e199f4c6e27b0d2b36e43)
I have a better one
Spoiler
Happy Singles Awareness Day.
aka salty singles day
Quote from: Altissimo on February 15, 2017, 04:25:08 AMaka salty singles day
I'm not being salty; just making fun of myself.
I've got a Valentine but I don't get to see them until Saturday/Sunday. Probably no sloppy make outs because I'm still recovering from the flu.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 16, 2017, 10:54:00 AMProbably no sloppy make outs because I'm still recovering from the flu.
What was your first kiss like?
Quote from: LeviR.star on February 16, 2017, 10:55:01 AMWhat was your first kiss like?
Spoiler
Assuming you don't mean the times where I only made lip contact with somebody, I'd say it was a little forced because I knew the other person would enjoy it and I'm generally just not into kissing or doing things with my mouth. For me it just felt completely neutral (not bad at all!), even when I really got into it. Other than that I enjoyed being close to somebody.
Some people will say that "oh, when you meet the right person you'll really feel it," but maybe kissing just isn't for everybody. I've heard it can be like fireworks going off in your head, but that probably applies to people who can derive more pleasure from oral stimulation than me.
I know it may not sound too romantic but we were keeping each other up for hours just cuddling, which I definitely enjoyed.
Quote from: Jub3r7 on February 16, 2017, 11:11:19 AMI'm generally just not into kissing or doing things with my mouth. For me it just felt completely neutral (not bad at all!)
I thought I was the only one. I get very conscious :P
Where's Viridi!? lol or maybe Bayo. But still. they're pretty much the same thing/type.
Kissing is a real weird thing to do. Like, why do we mush our mouths with people we like? And it's all squishy and asymmetric. But it's still fun because it's intimate.
What were the ages of y'all when you got your first kisses?
i dont remember because it didnt really matter much lmao
I can beat that, I haven't even had one yet.
Quote from: Nebbles on February 16, 2017, 06:04:45 PMI can beat that, I haven't even had one yet.
Hey! I'm not alone here! Yipee
Yay lonely singles unite or something.
I just had mine on valentines day so 18. I don't think it really matters when it happens though
Quote from: FireArrow on February 17, 2017, 01:54:17 AMI just had mine on valentines day so 18. I don't think it really matters when it happens though
this is actually really cute ow my heart
and i might be biased by saying it doesn't matter bc mine was sloppy and more to get the "first" idea out of the way than actually wanting it so yeah. it really doesn't matter
firsts are silly most of the time and only meaningful if you want them to be
Quote from: LeviR.star on February 16, 2017, 05:16:39 PMWhat were the ages of y'all when you got your first kisses?
Ah, the ripe old age of 12.
...Oi.
In other unrelated news, I'm spending Sunday night with my boyfriend since we have Monday off for president's day. Should be fun 8)
niiiiiiiiiiice
Aw, have fun~
So, uh... I have a friend. She's one of the nicest, most amazing person I've met since coming to college. She's usually very loud, energetic, and super affectionate to everybody (hugs and physical contact all around; not me, though: nobody wants to touch me); she's one of those people you just instantly think "surely they can't be single?" But... she's made some comments recently that have made me think twice about that, and see a lot of her actions in a different light. Latety, I've noticed that when she's not directly interacting with people, she seems a lot more tired, worn out, and less cheery than usual, and based on her aforementioned comments, I'm starting to think she's single and very unhappy about that. There's a dorm event in about a week or so that I want to ask her out to, but speaking and especially asking people out is far from my forte, so I'm feeling rather overwhelmed at this point, and although I know what I want to do, I don't know if I can actually will myself to go through with it...
duh just ask
you don't lose anything for asking
The best advice I can give you is just go for it. It may be tough to go through with it, but if you don't, you will always regret it. It's my philosophy (*and in most cases, scientific fact) that if you believe in yourself, you're more likely to accomplish things.
*It has been scientifically proven that this is true.
Go for it! An opportunity like this doesn't arrive every day. She sounds absolutely amazing; you'll definitely beat yourself up about it if you don't ask her.
DO IT
(https://media.giphy.com/media/Z0dvuZszc3r3i/giphy.gif)
I don't want to deter you from anything, but I have a friend like that. She's very touchy and has a very small personal bubble. She's also an extravert, so she is always happier to be around people rather than alone. But I know for a fact that none of that was a direct indication of anything romantic. So be careful not to have expectations if she's less than explicit.
Go do the ask on a date thing though. You just gotta say a question and then you know.
Oh man, you are so lucky to receive this opportunity. Take it!
Personally, I think if it's true that she always hugs everyone except you, that might be a sign to not make her uncomfortable? But most importantly, if you ask her, definitely accept her decision and don't push the issue. Best of luck my dude
Edit: also, being in a relationship isn't a cure all. She could be dating someone and still be generally tired and unhappy. And she also might not WANT to date anyone. It's important not to make illogical assumptions.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 14, 2017, 09:10:38 AMPersonally, I think if it's true that she always hugs everyone except you, that might be a sign to not make her uncomfortable? But most importantly, if you ask her, definitely accept her decision and don't push the issue. Best of luck my dude
Let me rephrase that. :P People here are pretty huggy/touchy in general (even with casual acquaintances), but pretty much everyone I know will kinda just awkwardly shuffle by me (except on two occasions, one of which was an awesome brohug!), so it's not something unusual or unexpected for
me.
QuoteEdit: also, being in a relationship isn't a cure all. She could be dating someone and still be generally tired and unhappy. And she also might not WANT to date anyone. It's important not to make illogical assumptions.
It's hard to explain in-depth, but at this point, based on conversations she's had with some of our mutual friends when I'm around, I feel pretty safe with my current conclusions. It was actually more illogical for me for think otherwise and was probably based more in my own self-doubt than anything else. That being said, it's still possible she wouldn't want to date me in specific.
ALSO UPDATE. I asked her earlier tonight (yesterday?) and she said that she wanted to go with me if she doesn't have any scheduling conflicts (she said she might have something else planned, but she'd double-check). Now I'm paranoid I wasn't explicit enough about my intentions. D: I was kinda nervous, so I just blurted it out super casually. That being said, thanks for the support so far everybody!
you said date right
you ought to say date to be clear
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on March 15, 2017, 03:21:36 PMyou said date right
you ought to say date to be clear
I'm going to be seeing her again tonight, so, yeah, I'll make sure to clarify that (and also emphasize that she shouldn't feel any pressure about saying no if she wants to!).
Best o' luck!
Long
So, two summers ago, my girlfriend broke up with me. And it was really hard on both of us. The basic reason is that she expected to be moving in a certain direction in her life, but I (and our friend group) was inevitably never going to go that way. And I completely trust that too; I always had the feeling it was true, but hoped she would be willing to stay around me despite it.
Anyway, she broke up with me and asked for distance and time. We both had a hard time and there wasn't any contact excepting an "Are you doing okay," conversation a couple weeks later. This was almost the start of my second year of college, so our friend group had split into two apartments (one with guys, one with girls). Since the guys physically had the things to do (board games, media, etc...), hanging out typically meant the girls coming to our apartment. My ex obviously didn't because she and I were still figuring stuff out. And part of her intent was to distance herself a little from our group anyway. She had also become much closer friends with another girl in our group and they spent a good amount of time together.
Now months pass without either of us saying a word to each other. She and the other girl slowly ceased all response in our text chat. I had essentially agreed to let her figure out what she needed to do, which meant to me that she would have to be the one to first break the silence, if that was going to happen. Snippets I heard from other people who interacted with her kinda painted her in a light I was a little uncomfortable with. I did my best to ignore it because it was only stuff people found notable enough to mention in passing. Things that wouldn't indicate all that much about her. But having not had contact with her for about half a year, and especially after being told by her that she wanted to take her life in a different direction, the little images I got piled up into an idea that conflicted with what I expected and hoped would be her. And the thing that made that idea grow was that she never said a word to me, directly or indirectly, and she never went out of her way to interact with the friends she made freshman year.
It was a year and a half before we had any sort of conversation, and it only had to do with a glitched out group text. It was no more than 10 texts between us, but it was almost strangely civil. At least, given the only image I could conjure of her potentially changed personality.
And now I have to back up a little to change the frame of reference. While we were dating, she was having some conflicts with another girl in the group. This other person was basically being a poor friend and my ex was done with it. That was apparently exacerbated over the summer along with some other stuff. Essentially, my ex and her friend sorta divided themselves from the other three girls in their apartment. Those three girls were the ones that tended to come visit us to play board games.
Apparently, after those three came back from visiting us, they would sometimes mention that we talked about disliking my ex and our other friend. Which is a complete lie. We actually pretty often mentioned that we wished they would visit more often. In fact, we were a little hurt that they stopped talking to us. And on the other side, when they heard that we didn't want them around, they probably were a little hurt and stopped wanting to interact with us. Given that she and I had broken up and not spoken, it was an upsetting but not unreasonable thought. But wrong.
So I spent months of my time fighting grief perpetuated by uncertainty and conflicting ideas, and she likely went through something similar, because of some petty lies. I'm very upset and only just getting a handle on everything after she broke up with me, and it's been a year and a half since then.
And I feel like I should say something to her, but I don't know how to approach all this. I'm more intimidated by her now than I ever was getting to know her.
tl;dr People can be awful, and it doesn't take much to seriously screw with somebody's emotions.
Quote from: Zunawe on March 15, 2017, 08:46:19 PMLong
So, two summers ago, my girlfriend broke up with me. And it was really hard on both of us. The basic reason is that she expected to be moving in a certain direction in her life, but I (and our friend group) was inevitably never going to go that way. And I completely trust that too; I always had the feeling it was true, but hoped she would be willing to stay around me despite it.
Anyway, she broke up with me and asked for distance and time. We both had a hard time and there wasn't any contact excepting an "Are you doing okay," conversation a couple weeks later. This was almost the start of my second year of college, so our friend group had split into two apartments (one with guys, one with girls). Since the guys physically had the things to do (board games, media, etc...), hanging out typically meant the girls coming to our apartment. My ex obviously didn't because she and I were still figuring stuff out. And part of her intent was to distance herself a little from our group anyway. She had also become much closer friends with another girl in our group and they spent a good amount of time together.
Now months pass without either of us saying a word to each other. She and the other girl slowly ceased all response in our text chat. I had essentially agreed to let her figure out what she needed to do, which meant to me that she would have to be the one to first break the silence, if that was going to happen. Snippets I heard from other people who interacted with her kinda painted her in a light I was a little uncomfortable with. I did my best to ignore it because it was only stuff people found notable enough to mention in passing. Things that wouldn't indicate all that much about her. But having not had contact with her for about half a year, and especially after being told by her that she wanted to take her life in a different direction, the little images I got piled up into an idea that conflicted with what I expected and hoped would be her. And the thing that made that idea grow was that she never said a word to me, directly or indirectly, and she never went out of her way to interact with the friends she made freshman year.
It was a year and a half before we had any sort of conversation, and it only had to do with a glitched out group text. It was no more than 10 texts between us, but it was almost strangely civil. At least, given the only image I could conjure of her potentially changed personality.
And now I have to back up a little to change the frame of reference. While we were dating, she was having some conflicts with another girl in the group. This other person was basically being a poor friend and my ex was done with it. That was apparently exacerbated over the summer along with some other stuff. Essentially, my ex and her friend sorta divided themselves from the other three girls in their apartment. Those three girls were the ones that tended to come visit us to play board games.
Apparently, after those three came back from visiting us, they would sometimes mention that we talked about disliking my ex and our other friend. Which is a complete lie. We actually pretty often mentioned that we wished they would visit more often. In fact, we were a little hurt that they stopped talking to us. And on the other side, when they heard that we didn't want them around, they probably were a little hurt and stopped wanting to interact with us. Given that she and I had broken up and not spoken, it was an upsetting but not unreasonable thought. But wrong.
So I spent months of my time fighting grief perpetuated by uncertainty and conflicting ideas, and she likely went through something similar, because of some petty lies. I'm very upset and only just getting a handle on everything after she broke up with me, and it's been a year and a half since then.
And I feel like I should say something to her, but I don't know how to approach all this. I'm more intimidated by her now than I ever was getting to know her.
Wow. That was... wow. First of all, you should become an author because you are amazing with words. Second of all, I think you should talk to her so that she doesn't think you were saying you disliked her. You wouldn't want that to be her last image of you. (And yes, I did read the whole thing.)
At this point you've got nothing to lose. What's she going to do, somehow avoid you more than she already does?
How'd it go?
Quote from: FireArrow on March 16, 2017, 12:46:00 PMAt this point you've got nothing to lose. What's she going to do, somehow avoid you more than she already does?
It's not really a question of the logical choice, but after so long, all the things I built up in my head and all the things I'm unsure about would collapse. And that uncertainty is scary. Not only that, but I still feel like I'm not supposed to be the one to talk to her first. At this point, that almost certainly doesn't matter, but it's a thing I've had in my head for a long time.
I'll do it at some point. I just need to figure out what I want out of it and to build up the courage and rhetoric to talk to her.
I think what you should want out of it is a mutual understanding of how you see each other. You think she's been doing some questionable stuff and want to know that she isn't; she might think you've been badmouthing her and wants to know that you aren't. At this point you're both wrapped up in uncertainty, and the longer you wait to address it, the worse it's going to get, to the point that you'll never be able to say anything because you don't know where to start.
I'm confident that things will work out between you and you'll both be able to move on, but yeah, I get that it's hard to know where to start. Just don't wait too long.
Ugh. Why am I so bad at expressing myself with spoken words? I'm half-convinced I should become a mute and handle all my important business through text, email, or Facebook messenger or snail mail. I'm that hopeless.
According to my girlfriend, I'm a shiny Rayquaza.
You're black?
If you search my real name online, yes.
oh oops that was intended to be a joke but that's cool too
I'm not the person who comes up when you search my name.
STOP MESSING WITH MY EVERYTHING
Have you never seen zunawe's face?
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on April 07, 2017, 06:14:19 PMO' course, I'm still trying to work my way outta the friend zone. *sighhhh* such a slow process, but it'll be worth it in the end, right?
I was stuck in that loop of thinking for yeeears. The link is referring specifically to 3:38 and onwards in the video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1huAFcy3ww
The 'friend zone' is the stupidest thing. People are either into you or they're not. The sooner you realise that, the sooner you can grow up and have an adult relationship. (Not meant in a mean or personal way, you're a cool bub)
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on April 08, 2017, 03:23:56 AMThe 'friend zone' is the stupidest thing. People are either into you or they're not. The sooner you realise that, the sooner you can grow up and have an adult relationship. (Not meant in a mean or personal way, you're a cool bub)
Real talk. This is absolutely true.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on April 08, 2017, 03:23:56 AMThe 'friend zone' is the stupidest thing. People are either into you or they're not. The sooner you realise that, the sooner you can grow up and have an adult relationship. (Not meant in a mean or personal way, you're a cool bub)
Thirding this.
I'm glad someone said it because I didn't want to be the one to again (I'm "fourthing" this)
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on April 07, 2017, 06:14:19 PMO' course, I'm still trying to work my way outta the friend zone. *sighhhh* such a slow process, but it'll be worth it in the end, right?
(emphasis mine)
i also just want to address this for anyone reading - again this isnt meant at a jab at e gadd, its a sentiment i see from a lot of people a lot of time
stop thinking like the end goal must be a relationship. "It'll be worth it in the end" are you implying that it's not worth it now? that friendship and that kind of bond isn't worth your time? there is no quicker way to make a girl feel unwanted than by making her think you're only friends with her so you can later date her. trust me
I know from experience. people have done that to me. people have cut off contact with me when I make it clear I'm not interested in dating them. people I was on friendly terms with. and it's
crushing. stop doing that.
Altissimo is right. I believe it still ultimately comes down to (and I know lots of people will disagree with me) thinking of the other person as an object that you'll at some point gain possession of.
You might not think that's what you're doing, and you might claim to respect her decision or believe that you're just really really in love with her, but it's a subconscious thing and you need to assess the way you think about her. If she's a "goddess who can do no wrong," or someone whose bad decisions or traits you constantly overlook in the hopes she'll like you more, you're not treating her like a human being. If you care about her that much, legitimately respect her decision and either steer clear or stop hoping, because she's a real person. And like Alti said, if she were to find out you were still secretly hoping or crushing on her, it could make her feel less like a real person. So it can actually be harmful.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 08, 2017, 08:30:14 AMAltissimo is right. I believe it still ultimately comes down to (and I know lots of people will disagree with me) thinking of the other person as an object that you'll at some point gain possession of.
in the past I've had crushes and I've asked them out and it didn't go so well. but I tried my damnedest to get over it afterward and make it as non awkward as possible because
I wanted to keep them as friends. I liked them a lot as people and didn't want to lose their companionship, romantic or non-romantic. like if you don't respect the friendship for what it is that says a hell of a lot about your approach to friendship and romance.
my current bf, when I asked him out I made it exceedingly clear I was okay with it if the answer was no and that I didn't want to lose him as a friend because I liked him enough that even if he didn't reciprocate, being friends with him would still be enough for me. he did reciprocate as it turned out but my point is that friendship should be important too. Like saying "ugh I'm stuck in the friend zone" is implying that the friendship and companionship is worth literally nothing since youre not getting laid and it honestly reeks of entitlement.
Pro tip: If you care about them you should care about them as a human, a person, a friend, an individual, and not
solely as a potential romantic partner.
I think you should be content with being in the friend zone- nothing wrong with it. A friend is a friend and a girl friend is a girl friend (but not a girlfriend) with girl perspective n stuff so yay
I mean, I get the logic behind the friend zone. (It took me a bit, but it hit me a while ago) And I do try to remain friends even if things don't work out; I'm friends with them with the exception of one person. But concerning that one person, it was very much so for the better. She went crazy shortly thereafter. O_o
Honest question: how, then, should it be worded? I'm a very goal-oriented person, so if I can set processes, things that require time or have a system to them, et al., in terms of goals, I can understand it better. Of course, that isn't realising the potential it has to be taken in the manner you said, materialising a person.
Wait until after prom though
Sounds like she doesn't want to be romantically involved with you so just keep hanging out so that prom isn't awkward as heck
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on April 07, 2017, 06:14:19 PMO' course, I'm still trying to work my way outta the friend zone. *sighhhh* such a slow process, but it'll be worth it in the end, right?
Honestly, speaking from experience, it isn't always worth it. Sometimes you're just better off as friends. Just my 2¢
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 08, 2017, 10:06:31 AMWait until after prom though
Sounds like she doesn't want to be romantically involved with you so just keep hanging out so that prom isn't awkward as heck
''Twas my plan. Need to keep things fun for prom!
Quote from: Yug_Guy on April 08, 2017, 10:17:12 AMHonestly, speaking from experience, it isn't always worth it. Sometimes you're just better off as friends. Just my 2¢
Yea, I know.
Thanks for everyone's input :3
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on April 08, 2017, 09:48:37 AMI mean, I get the logic behind the friend zone. (It took me a bit, but it hit me a while ago) And I do try to remain friends even if things don't work out; I'm friends with them with the exception of one person. But concerning that one person, it was very much so for the better. She went crazy shortly thereafter. O_o
Honest question: how, then, should it be worded? I'm a very goal-oriented person, so if I can set processes, things that require time or have a system to them, et al., in terms of goals, I can understand it better. Of course, that isn't realising the potential it has to be taken in the manner you said, materialising a person.
Never make your goal to change the way somebody thinks of you when it comes to a relationship. Forget the existence of the "friend zone." If you make your intentions clear, you'll be told whether there's the potential for a romantic relationship. With words like "yes, I'll go on a date with you." If you're waiting around hoping they'll develop more of an interest in you, you're making a mistake. Imagine any friend you have; somebody who enjoys your company. And now imagine finding out that they've only been friends with you in the hopes you'll become romantically interested in them.
Doesn't that sound hopeless? Wouldn't you tell them they should have just talked to you about it? What would it feel like if they stopped hanging out with you after you said you weren't interested?
And if you really must hear this in terms of a "friend zone," imagine that once you're there, you can never ever ascend by your choice. Nothing you do will affect whether they think of you romantically. That's up to their own personal development, and trying to influence that is an awful manipulative thing to do. But now you're lucky enough to be considered a friend by somebody you enjoy being around. Take their company with pleasure and move on romantically.
Phew... I already know what I need to do, but I need some confirmation. There's a girl. She shall here unto be referred as Pikachu. I'm a huge coward and can't bring myself to tell her how I feel. I already know what you're gonna say. "Just go for it." I know I should just go for it. I want to just go for it. But I haven't been able to.
Here's a bit of backstory. I only ever see Pikachu at school before classes start. Every day she's there I say, "Hi Pikachu!" and she replies in the kind of tone you'd hear in a sitcom, "Hiiii *(Insert Name Here)". Think of halfway between fake and real exasperation. It's kinda become a normal thing for us. After that, I say, "How are you?" and she replies with either, "Tired", "Bad", or some choice words if she had a really bad night. Then I always jokingly say, "Do you want a hug, Pikachu?" and she replies by either saying no or threatening to break some part of my body if I try. In a joking way. I wouldn't put it past her, but I know she wouldn't. Well, during Valentine's Day this year, I brought candy in for all my friends. I had a ton leftover from Christmas. That was the one time she offered to hug me. I hadn't even asked. I turned her down because, at the time, I didn't know that I liked her. Or maybe I didn't like her, yet. Either way, she had said that she would hug me. Yesterday, I was explaining why I had brought in candy for everyone to her and another one of my friends. I did it because I had no one to be with and I felt in a giving mood. After that, I felt kinda down, and she offered me various foods from her lunchbox, each of them I turned down. Until she offered me her sandwich, which she argued with me until I took it. Before that, I thought I had no chance with her. I'm not saying that I think she has a thing for me because she gave me her sandwich. I'm not an idiot. But I now know that she does care about me, at least.
I actually tried to make a deal with Anton (In case you aren't part of the Skype chat, he is a friend of mine that I have referring to a lot as of late, and his real name isn't Anton). I told him that if he told the girl he liked how he felt, then I'd tell Pikachu how I felt. He said no, saying something along the lines of "I don't want to take things too fast", which isn't really a thing. Taking things too fast only really fits when one is in a relationship. Another friend of mine (Not a friend of his) said that whenever she sees them together, she just wants to push them together. I don't know the girl's side of the matter, but from what I've seen, I think she might like him back. Although, this isn't really about him...
Thanks for listening to my spiel. If you did.
*My name, but I don't want to put that here.
I probably don't have the best advice, but I say that you should give it some more time and inspect the situation. She might show more signs of liking you, but in the meantime, try getting more comfortable with her I guess. At least that's what I'd do.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on April 08, 2017, 05:32:49 PMHe said no, saying something along the lines of "I don't want to take things too fast", which isn't really a thing. Taking things too fast only really fits when one is in a relationship.
This is, uh...not true. You can "take things to fast" to try and push yourself
into a relationship; it happens all the time. Like I said previously, a healthy relationship starts by taking the time to get to know someone on a regular level first before making any attempts towards romance.
@THC idk if i'm fully understanding y'all's dynamic, but if you continuously keep asking her for hugs (even in a joking way) and shes continuously refusing, please stop ahahaha speaking from experience having guys ask for hugs is uncomfortable and i'd get unbelievably anxious if i had to keep refusing them again and again
it sounds like she might be open to it idk, but at this point i think your best bet is to just wait until she asks you again but until then. no.
What kind of psycho rejects a hug???
People who like personal space, for one.
Pffffft nah
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on April 09, 2017, 12:30:24 AMWhat kind of psycho rejects a hug???
I've known several and they weren't psychos
I don't hug people period
It makes me uncomfortable but it doesn't mean I don't like you
I would hug people but people judge me because I apparently don't know how to hug :P
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on April 09, 2017, 12:30:24 AMWhat kind of psycho rejects a hug???
get your paws off me you damn dirty human
I just want to say I completely agree with Dudeman here.
Also, with what Bubbles said too. Don't assume you know how someone feels about something, unless they've explicitly told you.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 09, 2017, 02:17:32 PMI don't hug people period
It makes me uncomfortable but it doesn't mean I don't like you
Basically this
On the flip side if I do hug you that means you should feel very loved
"Who wants a free hug?"
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpa1.narvii.com%2F6352%2F3f5aa99d83e359ed32687b83480f55dd1fe23fb6_hq.gif&hash=8d2390d9b5b7583b14ecbd215d90a1899569bfb0)
Quote from: shadowkirby on April 09, 2017, 03:14:31 PMI just want to say I completely agree with Dudeman here.
Also, with what Bubbles said too. Don't assume you know how someone feels about something, unless they've explicitly told you.
l'm not assuming I know how she feels. I have no idea how she feels. I never assume things because, from my experience, assuming things pretty much guarantees the opposite to be true. If I said something contradictory to this, it was probably me miswording something. I'm very bad at wording when it comes to things like this.
Quote from: mastersuperfan on April 09, 2017, 04:57:45 PM"Who wants a free hug?"
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fpa1.narvii.com%2F6352%2F3f5aa99d83e359ed32687b83480f55dd1fe23fb6_hq.gif&hash=8d2390d9b5b7583b14ecbd215d90a1899569bfb0)
would you believe i cosplayed as him when i went to meet my bf at the airport
and he didn't recognize that i was cosplaying
I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that it's an ace attorney reference.
howdja guess :B
Quote from: Olimar12345 on April 09, 2017, 06:00:59 PMI'm going to go out on a limb and guess that it's an ace attorney reference.
Spoiler
OBJECTION!!!!!
You know that one cliche? That one in old movies, and cartoons, when there's a character who's trying to ask someone out, or maybe just say something embarrassing, and then their words get all drawn out and they hesitate to just get them out of their mouths? Well, I had that feeling today.
I had just gotten out of class, and I was thinking about what I'd say if I saw her. I told myself again what I'd have to do—just get it over with, be honest,
blunt, no holds barred—for what had to be the third or fourth time, but this time... I think I meant it. And then, I
SAW her. Right there. She was sitting at a table with two of her friends, and I sat down because, honestly, I didn't even have anything else to do for the rest of the day. We all talked a bit, and then, as if right on cue, both of her friends left at the same time.
We talked some more, just the two of us, but I still couldn't bring myself to speak the words I so longed to speak. Then, we went back to our work. Her at her computer, I reading
King Lear. Every so often, I'd pause and look up at her—face hidden in an afro of golden hair with a noticeable tint of fading blue—but I still couldn't
speak. I don't really know how much time passed. I kept reading, and she etched on a piece of paper—math homework.
Then, she got up and left. She said she'd be right back. I finished reading, pausing on the final page, absorbed deep in thought. Then, I put the book down. I started humming to myself to calm my nerves.
Life on Mars. It was a little cold out, even in the middle of the afternoon, and that wasn't helping me at all. After a few minutes, she came back. I started putting my stuff into my backpack, and she did likewise. I stood to leave. She said she had to get to her next class. She walked past and behind me. I turned. She stopped—before I even had a chance to start speaking, as if she had anticipated what I was about to do.
I don't remember all of what I said. It doesn't really matter, now does it? But I do remember what I ended with.
"Do you want to go out on a date with me?"
That's when it happened. That's when my words wanted to get all weird and dragged out. But they didn't. They didn't quite.
"To be honest," she started, "my life is kinda like a hurricane right now." Her voice trailed off.
But then she smiled. "But I'll get back to you on that."
/dramatization
She actually commented that my last two attempts to ask her out were "handled pretty well" despite my own opinions to the contrary. To be honest, it just makes me so unbelievably giddy that there's at least one person out there who genuinely has more faith in me than I do.
When I read "I had just gotten out of class" my brain legit started playing slowmo romance music unintentionally
Wow. That's great news! I think. I'm not that accustomed to what's good or bad in that situation. But I believe it's great news! Also, have you ever considered becoming an author? You have an amazing way with words that I've only ever seen in great books. Sounded like the introduction to a story.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on April 11, 2017, 08:49:24 PMWow. That's great news! I think. I'm not that accustomed to what's good or bad in that situation. But I believe it's great news! Also, have you ever considered becoming an author? You have an amazing way with words that I've only ever seen in great books. Sounded like the introduction to a story.
He's got a pretty kickass story topic, bro. (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?topic=5680.0)
Also congratulations, BDS!
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on April 11, 2017, 08:49:24 PMWow. That's great news! I think. I'm not that accustomed to what's good or bad in that situation. But I believe it's great news! Also, have you ever considered becoming an author? You have an amazing way with words that I've only ever seen in great books. Sounded like the introduction to a story.
The first time I asked her out, she had a scheduling conflict (like, something actually verifiable), and the second time, when I asked her if she wanted to go to a formal this week with me, she said she didn't want to have to go out and buy a dress (we're poor, busy college students yo!), which makes me think this is her way of being clear that she's not just making excuses to avoid me (plus the fact she was positioned at a choke point she most likely knew I'd have to pass through right around that time).
Quotegreat books
Coincidentally, the class I was leaving was called Great Books (and also the class where we met last semester).
Quote from: Dudeman on April 11, 2017, 08:57:58 PMHe's got a pretty kickass story topic, bro. (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?topic=5680.0)
Also congratulations, BDS!
Thank you, and also thanks for the plug! <3
You reminded me that I don't have a link to my topic in my signature, which makes me think I should take advantage of a URL shortener to fit at least one more link in there and... Wait. BDS change his signature!?!?! WHAT HAS OUR WORLD BECOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMEE?!?!
That sounds promising; you're doing great!
DoublePost
Sara is killing me, she is too cute!!! Honestly, I've stopped viewing her as a relationship partner/candidate and more as a friend and a wonderful human being, but I can't help myself from not flirting with her. I went and watched her tennis match today out in the cold weather, and I guess I don't understand that she really appreciates when I (and other friends) watch her do things. After she played, we sat together and talked a little bit, and we're not afraid to get into weird conversations because we're best friends. This girl is so weird, let me tell you, she looked at this 1-year old and was like, "Look at peanut". I was honestly so confused, but she does this way too often for it to be confusing anymore. I think it's adorable, she acts like a little child, but in all the best possible ways. This wasn't really anything in particular that happened, I just wanted to talk about her without writing a novel.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on April 13, 2017, 07:20:28 PMThis girl is so weird, let me tell you, she looked at this 1-year old and was like, "Look at peanut". I was honestly so confused, but she does this way too often for it to be confusing anymore.
never listen to me and my bf talk lmaoooooo
Quote from: Altissimo on April 13, 2017, 07:30:31 PMnever listen to me and my bf talk lmaoooooo
mostly bc it's creepy to watch someone else talk with their significant other when you've only talked to them on internet forums
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on April 13, 2017, 07:31:15 PMmostly bc it's creepy to watch someone else talk with their significant other when you've only talked to them on internet forums
fuk of
egg u
Quote from: shadowkirby on April 13, 2017, 07:50:42 PMegg u
You need to stop with these eggs, only Sara is allowed to talk about eggs. (Jk)
There is this one girl. Her parents are close friends to my parents. We are friends. We do swimteam (just throwing that out there). I really want to ask her out.
I couldn't manage to ask if she wanted to do something even if I wanted to. :-[
Plus, even if I did ask her out, idk how busy her schedule is, or if her parents would approve. (Another problem [I think] is that neither of us can drive, so it would be hard for my parents or her parents to take us anywhere)
Any advice?
I say you should become closer friends with her before thinking that far ahead. :P
fucking go for it, you regret what you didn't more than what you did
Quote from: Altissimo on April 14, 2017, 11:36:33 AMfucking go for it, you regret what you didn't more than what you did
This should be prerequisite reading before you're allowed to post on this thread.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on April 14, 2017, 12:47:13 PMThis should be prerequisite reading before you're allowed to post on this thread.
I can't exactly agree with that...I mean, if you've known someone for a long time and have teetered on the edge of asking then sure, it's a good idea, but don't do this with people you don't know so well. You might
actually regret it.
What wrong with asking someone out if you're not close with them yet?
Yeah actually I'd argue the exact opposite of Dudeman
I mean, if you don't know them very well, and they don't know you very well, then hitting on them might have a negative effect on your reputation in their eyes.
Honestly both sides are arguable. I'll try not to get too involved lol.
It's a difference in personal philosophy. There's no definitive "should" or "shouldn't"; people operate in different ways. I know people who end up just fine either way.
Personally, though, I'd never dream of asking someone out who I didn't get to know pretty well first.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 14, 2017, 10:41:57 PMYeah actually I'd argue the exact opposite of Dudeman
tbh i was only ever interested in the people i knew well but like... the point of going on dates is to know people better...................................... so
(in other words: i agree with you slow)
Quote from: Latios212 on April 14, 2017, 10:49:38 PMThere's no definitive "should" or "shouldn't"
That's because 'should' isn't definitive, it's a suggestion. 'Must' is definitive.
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on April 14, 2017, 07:53:09 AMor if her parents would approve
First step is to get on her parents' good side. I always did that (for the parents of the girls that
eventually friendzoned me), and the parents always smiled at me. They didn't even restate the rules, because they trusted me. Be nice to every adult you meet; word travels, my friend. ;)
Think of it this way: if the parents like you, they may even encourage their daughter to start dating you!
Stand back everyone
I asked a near complete stranger to senior prom. We had some fun, but there wasn't a lot of chemistry between us. I like her a lot as a friend and if I still lived there we'd probably hang out occasionally. Dating isn't always about finding your soul mate and there aren't prerequisites to dating someone outside of them saying yes
Just kiss her, that'll solve all your problems ;)
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on April 15, 2017, 09:48:40 AMJust kiss her, that'll solve all your problems ;)
do not do this, this is a breach of privacy and consent and is guaranteed to make her hate you. Believe it or not, women are not objects on which kisses can just be inflicted at a whim. It's disrespectful and rude.
Sorry, I meant it in a sarcastic way. I didn't mean to be a jerk :-[
thats fine, its hard to tell on the internet at times is all
I thought it was pretty obvious he was joking
And I did think it was funny
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 15, 2017, 05:35:01 PMI thought it was pretty obvious he was joking
i take things at face value more often than i should
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 15, 2017, 05:35:01 PMI thought it was pretty obvious he was joking
I thought it was obvious too, lol.
I don't give a fuck what you think, JERRY.
That's why you should use sarcy sharky. Put ^s around something that is meant in a sarcastic manner. (Or use italics but sarcy sharky is cooler)
Usually people use ::) or :P to signify sarcasm around here. I've rarely seen it done with winking.
Besides I honestly wouldn't put it past some of you to give that kind of advice anyway so
Quote from: Dude on April 16, 2017, 11:40:23 AMBesides I honestly wouldn't put it past some of you to give that kind of advice anyway so
qft
While we were taking a selfie at prom, my date kissed me lightly on the cheek. It's my first kiss, but I wasn't really wanting anything serious. She and I have been friends for quite some time now.
That's cute, lol.
Cheek kisses definitely don't count as a first kiss
Try again next time buddy
Hey. Perspective.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 24, 2017, 02:22:27 PMCheek kisses definitely don't count as a first kiss
Try again next time buddy
Well, that's what I was wondering. If it's on the lips, does it matter who does it first? I dunno.
I'd say first kiss has to be on the lips and reciprocated
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on April 24, 2017, 04:19:04 PMI'd say first kiss has to be on the lips and reciprocated
this
It's really whatever you want to call it, but most people say "first kiss" they're talking about what Noc said
Personally I've only enjoyed kissing one person so I'd call that my "first kiss" even though I'd kissed others before
(I don't really know where else to post this, so I guess it'll go here)
So I was going to tell my friends at the lunch table about my camping trip over the weekend and wanted to see their reactions. After everybody got settled down at the table, I then got all their attention so I could tell the story. The instant I opened my mouth, they all stopped listening and ignored me. I tried again, but they kept ignoring me. I tried a third time, still being ignored. Now, I've been ignored all the time throughout my life, and I'm getting kind of sick of it. I decide that since they don't want to listen to me, I'm just going to leave. Plus, this other girl wanted to sit at the table, but there was no seats, so I wanted to let her know there's an opening. As I leave, Sara notices and says to me, "Wait no, tell me about your camping trip." I'm stubborn and tell her "no" and keep walking. I was planning on playing a piano in a practice room because that usually helps me calm down. Sadly, there was no room open, so I just plopped myself down in the hallway, away from other people. I was expecting Sara to text me, but she didn't. She probably doesn't care enough to try any harder, especially since she's got other friends she'd rather be with. Near the end of the lunch period, one of my friends comes up to me and she says, "Sara sent me to harass you, so here I am". At first I thought, if Sara wants to check on me, she should come here herself, but then I realized that she cared enough to send somebody to check on me, and it was probably because she thought I'd respond to somebody else rather than her (which is not true, but she doesn't know that). After the girl reported back to Sara that I didn't respond, she came to me. She asked apologized for not responding and claimed that everybody at the table wants to hear the story, but I don't really believe her as they never show if these things are true or not. I told Sara that I'm not telling them because they had their chances and they didn't want to hear. She responded angrily, which surprised me, she said "Fine, you can just sit there" then she got up and left. I didn't think she had the heart to leave me like that, and I was right. She came right back and continued being nice. After a little bit, I then told her that I'd tell her the story a different time, and she made me promise her that I'd tell her. I also thanked her for talking to me, so I wasn't a complete jerk. I guess I'm only putting this here because I really appreciate what she did for me, even if it didn't seem like it, I really think she cares about me and this just shows it.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 01, 2017, 02:49:41 PM(I don't really know where else to post this, so I guess it'll go here)
I'll agree that this doesn't go here, albeit a great story. It should either go in Made Mah Day or someone should make a new thread for stories. As in true stories, not authorial, fictitious stories. We already have a section for that.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 01, 2017, 02:49:41 PM"Wait no, tell me about your camping trip."
Shows it.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 01, 2017, 02:49:41 PMI'm stubborn and tell her "no" and keep walking.
Isn't quite my suggested reaction to such kindness.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 01, 2017, 02:49:41 PMI guess I'm only putting this here because I really appreciate what she did for me, even if it didn't seem like it, I really think she cares about me and this just shows it.
iirc you were the one who was saying earlier "sara says she only likes me as a friend but i think its more than that" right? do you think this experience proves she likes you in a romantic way or when you say "she cares about me" do you mean as a friend?
Seems more like friend caring to me, but what do I know? Most of my friends would only be nice to me in similar situations of storming off.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 01, 2017, 02:56:53 PMiirc you were the one who was saying earlier "sara says she only likes me as a friend but i think its more than that" right? do you think this experience proves she likes you in a romantic way or when you say "she cares about me" do you mean as a friend?
I mean as a friend, sorry for the confusion.
that was a cute story
I probably should have posted this some time ago, but with the end of the semester a couple of days ago it's still relevant, I guess. It's a bit anticlimactic, especially after the last "chapter" I posted, but a conclusion's a conclusion.
My friend who I asked out and I talked and she said she didn't feel like she was ready for any relationships, especially with the end of the semester coming close. We're still chill, though, so all's good.
I finally got my crush's phone number. So excited!
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 02, 2017, 06:02:01 AMI finally got my crush's phone number. So excited!
Congratulations! I did, too; 2 of my crushes' numbers,
the same two crushes that friendzoned me within the first month of meeting me
What's the big deal with getting somebody's number? In the world of Facebook and, you know, seeing people every day at school anyway, bugging someone for their number just seems excessive.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 02, 2017, 12:14:44 PMWhat's the big deal with getting somebody's number? In the world of Facebook and, you know, seeing people every day at school anyway, bugging someone for their number just seems excessive.
I'm sorry; Spartan, did she give you the number? Or did you ask for it? I'm not sure you revealed this. There seems to be some assumption in our midst.
Texting is private and nice and intimate on some level
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 02, 2017, 12:52:44 PMTexting is private and nice and intimate on some level
And privacy can be mighty important in a relationship.
Don't text until marriage
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 02, 2017, 01:04:57 PMDon't text until marriage
BRB, I'm heading over to the Hall of Quotes.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 02, 2017, 01:04:57 PMDon't text until marriage
God yall just love killin my fun over here dont ya
WHAT ELSE SHOULD I NOT DO UNTIL MARRIAGE HUH
Quote from: Altissimo on May 02, 2017, 01:46:12 PMWHAT ELSE SHOULD I NOT DO UNTIL MARRIAGE HUH
Don't meet until marriage.
Don't marriage.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 02, 2017, 01:46:12 PMWHAT ELSE SHOULD I NOT DO UNTIL MARRIAGE HUH
eyyy I got someone to use full caps against me :D
Quote from: Altissimo on May 02, 2017, 01:46:12 PMWHAT ELSE SHOULD I NOT DO UNTIL MARRIAGE HUH
I choose not to have sex until marriage but you do what you want.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 02, 2017, 02:18:41 PMI choose not to have sex until marriage but you do what you want.
Hey, here's someone with morals! Good for you. ;)
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 02, 2017, 12:50:20 PMI'm sorry; Spartan, did she give you the number? Or did you ask for it? I'm not sure you revealed this. There seems to be some assumption in our midst.
Well, I asked her for it...
But I had a good excuse! My mom accidentally wiped my phone, so I needed to get my friends contact information again, so I just thought "Hmmm... Why not?" So I asked her and she showed me her number so that I could type it down on her contact list!
Haven't texted her yet tho...oh well. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 8)
Quote from: Dudeman on May 02, 2017, 01:47:16 PMDon't marriage.
Most important advice of this thread. THREAD CLOSED, EVERYONE GO HOME. DUDEMAN WINS!
5/2/17 Aggregate (v.)-
Now that you have her number, you can awkwardly attempt to conversate with her!
Honestly it's the only sure way for a man to not get fucked over after divorce especially if his kids are involved.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 02, 2017, 02:21:15 PMHey, here's someone with morals! Good for you. ;)
. . .actually no definitely have sex before marriage. Sex is one of those things that can make or break a relationship, don't wait until you're married to figure that out.
Also, let's dispel the myth that the first time you have sex with someone (especially when you're both virgins) that it's amazing. Maybe for you, if you're male-bodied, but more than likely you'll have zero idea what you're doing. It takes time to learn what your partner likes.
Don't wait until marriage to get it on, kids.
Part of me says this is sarcasm, the other part of me says it's not. Why do you torture me so?
Look mate, I don't mean until the day I get married but I don't want have sex until I'm sure that the person I do it with unlesss it's someone I'll want to be with for the rest of my life. Id prefer to be at the very least engaged. However having sex just for the heck of it leads to kids that were unwanted (or baby murder) and rampant STDs.
I would advise not listening to PDS for the foreseeable future.
He's like waddle bro except waddle bro was smart and rational
It's a scientific fact that sex creates an incredibly strong emotional bond between two people. It's the kind of bond that's supposed to be reserved for when two people are absolutely, fully, 100% committed to each other. Sex before marriage, before you're absolutely set on being together for the rest of your lives, can be disastrous if you decide to break up. You've formed a bond that will not break easily. Ethical arguments aside, it's a huge risk that can be easily avoided.
Besides, in my opinion, sex really shouldn't be a huge factor in what keeps your relationship together. It should be a reward for sticking through things to a lifelong commitment.
Do what you want and be happy, really. But my personal view is that sex before marriage and living together before marriage will let you know what it will actually be like when you're married. You can't know everything about a person without living with them. There's also the issue of not knowing what you like and want without getting experience, but I feel like there's no way I can get that across to the ones who are like "VIRGIN UNTIL WEDDING DAY PARENTS SAY SO AND I THINK ITS MORAL" without legitimately questioning why they believe in that in the first place (not saying that's anyone here, but honestly I've never seen even a remotely logical reason for that particular belief)
@Dudeman it's not scientific fact. Sex does not make everyone form emotional attachments. I don't know what "supposed to" means here. Forgive me, but I think that this kind of thinking is what leads to all sorts of unhealthy views and situations having to do with sex.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 02, 2017, 03:19:36 PMHowever having sex just for the heck of it leads to kids that were unwanted (or baby murder) and rampant STDs.
You're implying that people don't use protection tho
I know a lot of people who had/have sex outside of marriage but they're all like "yeah im not stupid, i use protection and make sure my partners dont have STDs"
However you feel about sex before marriage, there is this stereotype that it equates to children or STDs and that is, simply put, not true. You can have unwanted children and get STDs within a marriage. You can also have a shitton of non-marital sex and never get pregnant (or get your partner pregnant) or give/receive STDs. Marriage is not a charm that magically prevents either of these things from happening.
I'm not here to argue about the morality of it, because when it comes right down to it, the difference is in how different people view the act of sex. I do, however, feel the need to correct that misconception. Please do not spread that misconception like an STD.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 02, 2017, 03:34:31 PMI'm not here to argue about the morality of it, because when it comes right down to it, the difference is in how different people view the act of sex.
This.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 02, 2017, 03:36:48 PMThis.
Basically it's "sex as a means to create life and/or a manifestation of the highest possible bond of love between two humans" versus "sex as a pleasurable act and/or one that helps two people to grow closer together and know each other better" and there is, ultimately, no good that can come from warring between the two camps. All you can do is not disparage those who believe and live differently. Please live and let live.
Fair points. I just can't stand the idea that sex isn't something that can't be done responsibly, much like alcohol or pot should be.
Ultimately make sure you're safe.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 02, 2017, 03:20:55 PMI would advise not listening to PDS for the foreseeable future.
He's like waddle bro except waddle bro was smart and rational
Aww baaabe!! <3<3<3
It'd be a kicker if two people who haven't had sex married each other just to realize they aren't even attracted to their partner's gender.
The wait for sex until after marriage also shows some self-control in people. It's just supposed to be fun, provided it be done right. If anyone thinks that relationships can only last provided that sex is involved, they probably can't find ways to bond otherwise. If relationships worked that way, we might as well call it "free prostitution", which is what it's turning out to be these days.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 02, 2017, 07:02:19 PMIf anyone thinks that relationships can only last provided that sex is involved, they probably can't find ways to bond otherwise.
No one is arguing this point
QuoteIf relationships worked that way, we might as well call it "free prostitution", which is what it's turning out to be these days.
This however isn't true. Relationships are no different than they have ever been. People have always been, and will always be, trying to get laid as part of their interactions with the opposite (or same, as the case may be) sex. We're just more open about admitting it as a culture, that's all that's changed. The nature of relationships themselves has not.
back in freud's day sex was very taboo and most of his patients were married women who were very sexually frustrated. That was why most of his understanding of psychology was so sex-driven
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 02, 2017, 07:09:29 PMback in freud's day talking about sex was very taboo and most of his patients were married women who were very sexually frustrated. That was why most of his understanding of psychology was so sex-driven
ftfy
Quote from: Altissimo on May 02, 2017, 07:10:01 PMftfy
thx
yeah dudes still had their mistresses or whatever, women were expected to be above such base desires
Quote from: Dudeman on May 02, 2017, 03:25:53 PMIt's a scientific fact that sex creates an incredibly strong emotional bond between two people. It's the kind of bond that's supposed to be reserved for when two people are absolutely, fully, 100% committed to each other. Sex before marriage, before you're absolutely set on being together for the rest of your lives, can be disastrous if you decide to break up. You've formed a bond that will not break easily. Ethical arguments aside, it's a huge risk that can be easily avoided.
Besides, in my opinion, sex really shouldn't be a huge factor in what keeps your relationship together. It should be a reward for sticking through things to a lifelong commitment.
Scientific fact is a strong word not applicable here. Trust me, you can have sex without forming a powerful bond. That stuff usually only happens if you're already in love with the person/think your in love with the person. Then you find out they were only taking advantage of you and boom instant truama.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 02, 2017, 07:09:29 PMback in freud's day sex was very taboo and most of his patients were married women who were very sexually frustrated. That was why most of his understanding of psychology was so sex-driven
Freud is still really important to our modern underatandinf of human sexuality. He just had a bunch of really dumb shit that we have to ignore (see: penis envy.)
FireArrow knows what's up.
Spoiler
I've just been watching this debate and have been cheering on the marriage side lol
Tbh as an MRA I'm not sure if I even want to get married.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 03, 2017, 07:14:45 AMTbh as an MRA I'm not sure if I even want to get married.
Wait, you're a Magnetic Resonance Angiogram? A kind of MRI scan? (Idk if that is humanly possible, lol)
QuoteA magnetic resonance angiogram (MRA) is a type of magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) scan that uses a magnetic field and pulses of radio wave energy to provide pictures of blood vessels inside the body. ... The test is often used to look at the blood vessels that go to the brain, kidneys, and legs.
No. A Men's Rights Activist
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 03, 2017, 07:14:45 AMTbh as an MRA I'm not sure if I even want to get married.
it's okay nobody wants to marry you anyways
Spoiler
it's a joke <3 I'm sure BWOAF is just fine
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 03, 2017, 07:45:04 AMNo. A Men's Rights Activist
that better not be a real thing~
Freud really is important in modern psychology as a majority of our understanding of it comes from later psychologists proving him wrong with large scale studies
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 03, 2017, 08:03:34 AMthat better not be a real thing~
sorry babe, it is and it's just what you think it is
Tbh most people don't know what the men's rights movement is about and they just brand it as something inherently sexist when it's not. We focus on important issues that men face and we're trying to change things. Nothing about the men's rights movement is decisions in any way
Makes sense. I don't like supporting any movements because I don't like taking sides. :P
If you stand for nothing, Cash, what'll you fall for?
But why
Why do you even care enough about "the issues men face"
Usually the white american male is privileged. "Privileged white male"
Meh, I wish I got free stuff for being a straight white conservative Christian male
Edit: oops wow we're off topic let's talk about good date ideas
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 03, 2017, 10:16:22 AMEdit: oops wow we're off topic let's talk about good date ideas
local museums
bf and i went to a horse racing museum when i visited him and the aviation museum when he visited me lol
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 03, 2017, 10:13:06 AMUsually the white american male is privileged. "Privileged white male"
Given the lack of evidence for this, I see it as a myth.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 03, 2017, 10:16:22 AMEdit: oops wow we're off topic let's talk about good date ideas
The idea of privilege us just that being a democracy (and general human nature) society it built around and therefore catered to the majority. For example its a lot easier to find skin care products for white skin than black skin, which gives white people the "privilege" of having a much larger selection of skin care goods.
This is relevant because I am in a relationship with ointment.
Accidently double posted dafuq is the delete button on a phone
Quote from: FireArrow on May 03, 2017, 10:38:36 AMThe idea of privilege us just that being a democracy (and general human nature) society it built around and therefore catered to the majority. For example its a lot easier to find skin care products for white skin than black skin, which gives white people the "privilege" of having a much larger selection of skin care goods.
This is relevant because I am in a relationship with ointment.
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
hot
So a girl on the bus sat by me and started talking to me. She was 3 years younger, and in 8th grade, and never stopped the conversation. She always complimented me on my manners and accomplishments. This morning she did the same and then, out of the blue, told me about a boyfriend she just (EDIT: got) on Saturday. She was still in a good mood, but from the way we first met, I thought she liked me. I did, though, consider the 3-year age gap. Before I left, she asked why I was single. I didn't have a good answer.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 03, 2017, 11:35:23 AMBefore I left, she asked why I was single.
What a dick
Given that she just...broke up? (I think you might have omitted a word or two by accident.) It's possible she's reeling from that and is desperately looking for a replacement. Honestly, I wouldn't encourage dating anyone who's younger than 16 or so (and I'd encourage waiting longer than that) since a lot of feelings at that age are based on raging hormones, which can obscure thinking about a person on multiple levels apart from whether they just "feel" good.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 03, 2017, 11:40:30 AMGiven that she just...broke up? (I think you might have omitted a word or two by accident.) It's possible she's reeling from that and is desperately looking for a replacement. Honestly, I wouldn't encourage dating anyone who's younger than 16 or so (and I'd encourage waiting longer than that) since a lot of feelings at that age are based on raging hormones, which can obscure thinking about a person on multiple levels apart from whether they just "feel" good.
I disagree with this immensely but I will agree that dating someone who's 13, when you're 16, is a HUGE no-no. That is too large on an age gap at that age
Probably once you and the person you want to date are over the age of 20 age gaps are fine (my grandpa and grandma are 8 years apart)
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 03, 2017, 12:20:40 PMProbably once you and the person you want to date are over the age of 20 age gaps are fine (my grandpa and grandma are 8 years apart)
Yeah tbh this sounds fine
Quote from: Dudeman on May 03, 2017, 11:40:30 AMGiven that she just...broke up? (I think you might have omitted a word or two by accident.) It's possible she's reeling from that and is desperately looking for a replacement. Honestly, I wouldn't encourage dating anyone who's younger than 16 or so (and I'd encourage waiting longer than that) since a lot of feelings at that age are based on raging hormones, which can obscure thinking about a person on multiple levels apart from whether they just "feel" good.
Oops, I meant to say that she just
got a boyfriend. My mistake
Quote from: Altissimo on May 03, 2017, 12:08:48 PMI disagree with this immensely but I will agree that dating someone who's 13, when you're 16, is a HUGE no-no. That is too large on an age gap at that age
That's what I was thinking, but I didn't want to say anything to hurt her feelings.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 03, 2017, 12:34:19 PMOops, I meant to say that she just got a boyfriend. My mistake
oh okay you can ignore my post then
I did notice your post; just clarifying.
I didn't read that as a vindictive comment. Should I have ought to?
I think that 8th grader shouldn't be dating. It's just weird.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 03, 2017, 02:26:28 PMI think that 8th grader shouldn't be dating. It's just weird.
Especially since I'm a tenth grader.
Lol, I have an 8th grader who seems like she likes me. She's fun to hang out with, but distance will prevent us from being anything more than friends. Plus, I love Sara, I wouldn't be able to date anybody else.
oh there's actually a formula that determines a good age gap, it's something like +7 /2 but I don't remember exactly...
that's not it but something like that
My dad is thirteen years older than my mom ahahahaha
It just gets weirder as I get older because I can't imagine dating someone that much younger, though as people said already after the age of 20 (and especially after 25 imo) the maturity gap closes a LOT so it's not a big deal
HALF YOUR AGE PLUS SEVEN
so for me it'd be 17 minimum 24 maximum
The God Emperor Donald Trump married someone 27 years younger than him so that means anything's acceptable tbh
Oh, yeah, that's someone's example that's definitely worth following 9_9
59/2=30+7=37 59-27=32 so that's under his age range lol
Now calculate what age Trump would have to be for it to be ok.
50
But if she's 27 years younger it'd still not be ok
If anything, that's worse.
oh wait it needs to be older mb
uh...
64/2=32+7=39 64-27=37 and that's still too old
so probably 68
See, at that point you're an old man marrying a young woman and it's just straight-up creepy then.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 03, 2017, 05:58:46 PMSee, at that point you're an old man marrying a young woman and it's just straight-up creepy then.
Eh, people can do what they want.
Though I do remember from psychology that people tend to get along better with people from similar walks of life. Similar cultural/religious/economic backgrounds and similar age groups, presumably because it helps you bond if you can talk about things that happened within your lifetime instead of, like, "hey what did you think about the moon landing? shit was nuts" "idk my parents hadn't even met yet so"
Quote from: Altissimo on May 03, 2017, 06:00:46 PMThough I do remember from psychology that people tend to get along better with people from similar walks of life. Similar cultural/religious/economic backgrounds and similar age groups, presumably because it helps you bond if you can talk about things that happened within your lifetime instead of, like, "hey what did you think about the moon landing? shit was nuts" "idk my parents hadn't even met yet so"
Actually, I don't really get along with people my age that much. I'm much more comfortable around younger kids and adults. I'm less mature than people my age in the sense that I like to do things younger kids are more likely to do. I'm more mature than people my age in the sense that I act more like an adult than the people my age (at least in this area) and my tastes seem to be more along the lines of those born in the 70's. I just don't have that much in common with people my age.
it's a general statement not something that applies to literally everyone
Quote from: Altissimo on May 03, 2017, 06:38:16 PMit's a general statement not something that applies to literally everyone
I know. I was just stating that I was one of the exceptions. Technically I wasn't off-topic because the thread
is relationships. It doesn't say what kind of relationships. Platonic relationships are still relationships. Third sentence and onward isn't at you, Alti. It's more so that Dudeman or Noc don't say I went off-topic.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 03, 2017, 05:56:39 PMoh wait it needs to be older mb
uh...
64/2=32+7=39 64-27=37 and that's still too old
so probably 68
I'll help
A/2-7=A-27
Solve for A
Quote from: Dude on May 03, 2017, 06:50:23 PMI'll help
A/2-7=A-27
Solve for A
Solving for A doesn't give you an answer with a difference of 27 years. It gives you the answer for if one was 27 years old. A=40. When put in Noc's original equation, it comes out to be that the younger person is 27. Therefore, using your equation, the difference is 13 years. Noc was right when he said 68. That comes to a difference of 27 years.
Well actually it's more of a C answer, my b
The younger person would be 40 so
Also if I did the equation right that would have been nice
A/2+7=A-27
I switched +7 for -7 in the earlier one oops
Y is maffs in thu relationship fred wut
Quote from: Dude on May 04, 2017, 05:54:11 AMAlso if I did the equation right that would have been nice
A/2+7=A-27
I switched +7 for -7 in the earlier one oops
Yeah this one actually works. THC I don't know where you're getting the idea that this solves for someone who IS 27, like at all
I just finished my maths homework and I come back to this.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 03, 2017, 06:35:45 PMActually, I don't really get along with people my age that much. I'm much more comfortable around younger kids and adults. I'm less mature than people my age in the sense that I like to do things younger kids are more likely to do. I'm more mature than people my age in the sense that I act more like an adult than the people my age (at least in this area) and my tastes seem to be more along the lines of those born in the 70's. I just don't have that much in common with people my age.
THIS IS FREAKING ME (except for the -70s thing)
Quote from: Altissimo on May 04, 2017, 06:01:35 AMYeah this one actually works. THC I don't know where you're getting the idea that this solves for someone who IS 27, like at all
It works now. Dude originally had a -7 instead of a +7. What I said is correct when the equation has a -7.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 04, 2017, 06:43:43 AMIt works now. Dude originally had a -7 instead of a +7. What I said is correct when the equation has a -7.
uh that still wouldnt solve for someone who's 27, it'd just be the wrong equation
???
whatever we're getting off topic ignore me
Quote from: Altissimo on May 04, 2017, 06:47:03 AMuh that still wouldnt solve for someone who's 27, it'd just be the wrong equation
When A=40, then the younger person is 27 is what I was saying. Since A is the age being divided by 2, it is the older age. Besides, it's technically on topic because it has to do with an equation for an ok age gap. I'm ahead in the math program at my school, I'm
pretty sure I can solve a simple equation like this.
Work Shown
A/2-7=A-27
A/2=A-20
A=2A-40
-A=-40
A=40
40/2+7 (This is Noc's original equation.)
20+7
27
The more you think you know about math, the less you actually do.
If we keep going we might be able to figure out that magic algorithm eHarmony uses and then we'll be rich.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on May 04, 2017, 07:42:09 AMIf we keep going we might be able to figure out that magic algorithm eHarmony uses and then we'll be rich.
but if its the algorithm eharmony uses how are
we going to get rich off of it
We won't, eHarmony is a garbage place.
vHarmony
The v is for videogames
Quote from: Dude on May 04, 2017, 07:46:53 AMvHarmony
The v is for videogames
thats my kind of dating website
Quote from: WaluigiTime64 on May 04, 2017, 06:01:48 AMI just finished my maths homework and I come back to this.
Freaking same here
Quote from: Dude on May 04, 2017, 07:46:53 AMvHarmony
The v is for videogames
Tbh when I first saw the relationship thread I thought it would be filled with people saying "anyone want to have one?"
So my Age/2 and the plus 7...
That means I could date a 15 year old. Actually, I'm fine with that. My crush is 15 anyways. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 08:30:13 AMTbh when I first saw the relationship thread I thought it would be filled with people saying "anyone want to have one?"
does anyone want a relationship?
well?( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 04, 2017, 08:33:50 AMSo my Age/2 and the plus 7...
I'm technically 19 but I'll use 20 because a) it's an even number and b) I'll be 20 in a month anyways
So 17 would be OK? I think I'd feel too weird about that
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 04, 2017, 09:34:33 AMSo 17 would be OK? I think I'd feel too weird about that
euhhh technically it is legal for an adult to date ppl who are underage if its within like a few years (at least in my state) but that's one case where I would say you probably shouldn't follow the "equation" lol. I mean it can work I guess but it's a little skeevy at least to me
Yeah in my state it would be legal too but I still wouldn't do it. In general there is a significant maturity gap between 17 and 20.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 04, 2017, 09:01:21 AMdoes anyone want a relationship?
Not with any of you guys, unfortunately. (At least not right now)
Eh, 17 and 20 sound close enough to me
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 10:09:57 AMNot with any of you guys, unfortunately. (At least not right now)
What about te girls?
guys meaning people, excuse my french.
Everybody knows guy is gender neutral
I'm sorry but I have to ask. Noc, is your flavor text a Bon Jovi reference?
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 04, 2017, 10:16:10 AMWhat about te girls?
te girls that live at least around 5000 miles away + I don't know any of them and likely never will?
Nah thanks, bub.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 10:25:16 AMte girls that live at least around 5000 miles away
Aren't you in Germany now? Bloop lives in the Netherlands, I believe. That's not
too far.
That's a good point, actually. Better go arrange the marriage then!
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 04, 2017, 10:23:51 AMI'm sorry but I have to ask. Noc, is your flavor text a Bon Jovi reference?
lol
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 12:11:39 PMThat's a good point, actually. Better go arrange the marriage then!
Can I be the best man? I know E. Gadd would be your first choice, but he's very busy. I don't think he'd mind.
Step one of my fool-proof plan to replace E. Gadd is complete! Take his place at Andy's wedding. Check!
MINIMODDING POST
Stop using size 1 or 2 font. Make small text readable without zooming in please and thank you
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 04, 2017, 12:22:14 PMCan I be the best man? I know E. Gadd would be your first choice
Why would you assume E. Gadd? I could pick anyone.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 04, 2017, 12:24:03 PMMINIMODDING POST
Stop using size 1 or 2 font. Make small text readable without zooming in please and thank you
Yup yup siree. I am AmpharosAndy and I approve this message.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 04, 2017, 12:24:03 PMStop using size 1 or 2 font. Make small text readable without zooming in please and thank you
I just did it because others did it. I agree that it's very annoying. I shall stop.
The point of using font that small is to make a small point lol. You can always hit quote to see it just fine. I don't have any qualms against using it and people have been doing it for years.
Sorry Noc, but I side with the stronger side and Dudeman's practically one level down from a god. He's a Dudemigod.
That's Maestro's spot, not mine.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on January 17, 1970, 10:58:46 PMDudeman's practically one level down from a god. He's a Dudemigod.
Brb taking this to the hall.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 04, 2017, 12:33:25 PMThat's Maestro's spot, not mine.
I said it more for the pun than anything. The only thing I actually meant in that statement was that I'm siding with the stronger side.
Wait, when was I roped into all this?
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 04, 2017, 12:22:14 PMCan I be the best man? I know E. Gadd would be your first choice, but he's very busy. I don't think he'd mind.
Well, I'm very flattered and would love to travel! But... being a best man is too formal. Can I be the guy that jumps out of the cake, scaring the crepe out of everyone?
Only if you wear a dress.
DEAL
...
What's the colour scheme going to be?
Idk, man. You'll have to check with the bride. (The bride who is completely unaware of the fact that she is now a bride)
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:28:28 PM(The bride who is completely unaware of the fact that she is now a bride)
We should keep it a secret. We'll have the bridesmaid take her to the place of the wedding under a false pretense and then we all yell "SURPRISE! YOU'RE GETTING MARRIED!".
Brilliant plan!
Those rules don't apply over here, mang.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:42:27 PMBrilliant plan!
Wait... doesn't that mean you decide the color scheme for the wedding? Can it be red and black? They seem to suit me well.
yellow black
do it
GO WHITE AND GREEN! GO WHITE AND GREEN
Green and black. Those are the only colors suited for... THE GREEN THUNDER!
*cue the bass*
I'm not having a bee movie themed wedding, dudeman!
White and green is an interesting shout
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:48:31 PMI'm not having a bee movie themed wedding, dudeman!
Okay, then go with the backup plan. Black and yellow.
You know what it is
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:48:31 PMBlack and green is an interesting shout
Glad to see you coming to your senses, Andy. Brobot and I are too busy with Mario to deal with someone who disagrees.
Who's brobot?
black and yellow
lets shake it up a little
Quote from: braixen1264 on May 04, 2017, 01:54:43 PMblack and yellow
lets shake it up a little
I wish i could quote braixen1264's whole profile here lol
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:48:31 PMI'm not having a bee movie themed wedding, dudeman!
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:54:03 PMWho's brobot?
The only brobot I know is the nickname Android 16 was given in DBZA
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 04, 2017, 01:54:03 PMWho's brobot?
...
...
...
...
Who's... Brobot...
BROBOT IS THE ROBOT I MADE TO DESTROY MARIO! I AM VERY GOOD WITH TOOLS AND ENGINEERING AND COUNT BLECK TOLD ME TO DESTROY MARIO, SO I MADE BROBOT, BUT MARIO DESTROYED HIM SO I HAD TO REMAKE HIM, BUT BETTER! THUS, BROBOT L-TYPE WAS BORN! HE'S FAMILY TO ME!
This is the spammiest chain of comments I've seen on NSM in a looong time.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 04, 2017, 12:28:23 PMThe point of using font that small is to make a small point lol. You can always hit quote to see it just fine. I don't have any qualms against using it and people have been doing it for years.
or use size 4 font as it's still small and readable
Quote from: Maelstrom on May 04, 2017, 02:11:24 PMThis is the spammiest chain of comments I've seen on NSM in a looong time.
I'll take that as a compliment :D
Quote from: Maelstrom on May 04, 2017, 02:11:24 PMThis is the spammiest chain of comments I've seen on NSM in a looong time.
I am on-topic. I have a serious brolationship with Brobot. He's my #1 bro! We've destroyed so many things together.
Whenever I read Brobot I keep remembering that stupid Jimmy neutron episode
And I didn't even watch it much...
:O I forgot about that episode!
Green & white because it's the opposite of red and black ;)
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 04, 2017, 12:29:55 PMSorry Noc, but I side with the stronger side and Dudeman's practically one level down from a god. He's a Dudemigod.
You will be punished for your heresy.
I told you so
this isn't really a romantic relationship (after a few emotionally fucky events over my first and second semester i've promised myself to not mess w anyone at all unless i'm sure they genuinely like me for more than like a weekend lmao) but a friend-relationship that really makes me happy :-)
i have this cute lil study group for my bio classes and its all guys except for me. i really really vibe with guy energy (as opposed to girl, which my entire dorm floor is filled with and its honestly exhausting and inescapable) so having this group that texts all the time and has 5+ hour study sessions in a private library room is one of the best things that's happened to me in a while :-) just wanted to share.
studying is boring as hell and brutal especially for science courses but i'm enjoying every second of it and i'm probably going to be devastated once the semester is over and we all have no reason to talk anymore
Sorry to interrupt, but hold the phone
(https://imageshack.com/i/pnClXYwop)
I'm confuzzled.
That little icon isn't really the best indicator on this forum. I'm 99% sure Bubbles' is a joke.
Anything is possible when you change what a quote says.
Ah, good ol' honest Abe!
The Green Thunder strikes a nerve! T R I G G E R E D
Quote from: Zunawe on May 05, 2017, 02:33:54 PMThat little icon isn't really the best indicator on this forum. I'm 99% sure Bubbles' is a joke.
it absolutely
was a joke, literally from like 5 years ago or so so i don't even remember what it was about!!! but apparently it was v funny at the time so why change it now yknow
also i never stop thinking its the tiniest bit funny when i find out someone thought i was a guy their entire nsm experience. i don't think i could get any farther from the stereotype of a guy lmaoo
Quote from: Dudeman on May 05, 2017, 02:36:09 PMlet it be known
also true
Quote from: Bubbles on May 05, 2017, 03:47:14 PMalso i never stop thinking its the tiniest bit funny when i find out someone thought i was a guy their entire nsm experience. i don't think i could get any farther from the stereotype of a guy lmaoo
I assumed you were homosexual based on previous posts in the relationships thread. Not because of the way you talk. Because you mentioned liking a guy at some point in the distant past.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 05, 2017, 03:50:33 PMI assumed you were homosexual based on previous posts in the relationships thread. Not because of the way you talk. Because you mentioned liking a guy at some point in the distant past.
come on man thats not a sign of homosexuality it could just as well be bisexuality :B
Quote from: Altissimo on May 05, 2017, 03:52:21 PMcome on man thats not a sign of homosexuality it could just as well be bisexuality :B
Or pansexuality (also called omnisexuality).
Be careful when assuming someone's sexuality. It can come across badly sometimes.
or asexuality!!! never said i wanted to do anything besides get close to him!! it could have been literally anything other than straight i'm p sure
tho i'm personally against labels like that, since from my experience most of the time they lead to either stigmas or confusion.
ninja'd
Quote from: Bubbles on May 05, 2017, 04:00:22 PMtho i'm personally against labels like that, since from my experience most of the time they lead to either stigmas or confusion.
ninja'd
yeah tbh i think labels carry stereotypes and judgments with them that arent really applicable anymore, not to mention i think its more well established by now that sexuality is a spectrum
I'm amused
Holy crap, why are there so many terms?
Because sexuality and gender are fluid and you can't just stuff a bunch of people under one term.
Okay, sorry I didn't know.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 05, 2017, 04:01:40 PMnot to mention i think its more well established by now that sexuality is a spectrum
maybe within the community or anyone who cares to educate themselves, but for the majority of people its still mostly "gay or straight....maybe bi? or confused"
Quote from: Bubbles on May 05, 2017, 04:33:58 PMmaybe within the community or anyone who cares to educate themselves, but for the majority of people its still mostly "gay or straight....maybe bi? or confused"
i know for the majority of people i'm talking more along the lines of like, it's more accepted by science etc
Quote from: Nebbles on May 05, 2017, 04:31:00 PMBecause sexuality and gender are fluid and you can't just stuff a bunch of people under one term.
Well yeah, but it's getting to the point that people are acting
so nuanced that there's just way too many "sexualities" for people to be taking the sexual spectrum seriously anymore.
ninja'd:
Quote from: Bubbles on May 05, 2017, 04:33:58 PMmaybe within the community or anyone who cares to educate themselves, but for the majority of people its still mostly "gay or straight....maybe bi? or confused"
This, basically; it's a spectrum, but no matter if you call it crimson, scarlet, or vermilion, it's sill red.
I would never get offended if anyone assumed I was any particular sexuality
Bisexual is most correct but I wouldn't mind at all if someone got it wrong, I'd just explain that I'm not
The problem with extreme liberals is they want everyone to automatically be educated and just get offended and hostile when people who don't know better get it wrong
Like I'm very liberal progressive hippie whatever label you want to give me but I understand that some things are foreign and hard to understand for people who haven't been exposed to them so idk it's important to pick your battles and educate people instead of lashing out because people aren't already educated
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 05, 2017, 05:49:39 PMThe problem with people is they just get offended and hostile when people who don't know better get something wrong
It's completely ludicrous to expect everyone to know how you wanna be adressed and treated when there's almost no way they could've known in the first place. On the otherside of the coin, it's a pretty asshole move to completely ignore the way someone identifies after being made aware of it because "it's too complicated for me." It's literally just being a nice and reasonable person there's no need to get opinions or politics involved.
Question, because I'm curious:
When you hear the phrase "I like you as a person," what do you infer?
You'd make a terrible horse.
Ha! It's funny! Because today was the Kentucky Derby
...
Yea, not as funny as I first imagined
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on May 06, 2017, 08:56:35 PMQuestion, because I'm curious:
When you hear the phrase "I like you as a person," what do you infer?
That is universal code for "You're ugly" or "I'm not interested".
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 06, 2017, 09:01:29 PMThat is universal code for "You're ugly" or "I'm not interested".
... probably more of the latter I'd say
never had anyone tell me they like me, so I can't tell you there
Quote from: Altissimo on May 06, 2017, 09:03:53 PM... probably more of the latter I'd say
I agree. The former is more used while in a relationship. Anton likes a girl and thought he was shallow because he liked her for who she was and didn't find her physically attractive at all. I tried to explain to him that's pretty much the opposite of shallow, but it took a little while before it got through his skull.
So I just spent pretty much my entire day hanging out with Sara. We were spending our day in a bigger city an hour south of us, I was getting my new laptop, we were looking at furniture, and I had a piano recital. Sara decided she wanted to tag along to watch my recital, which meant she was with us for the 6+ hour trip. One thing I noticed is that me and Sara seem to like to talk about houses, furniture, and places to live. We see a house that looks like a nice living spot and we start commenting on what houses look nice and if it's a nice place to live. We were walking through a furniture store, commenting on what furniture was nice (mostly the bizarre modern stuff) as well as talking about fun things you can do with them. In the past, we both decided that North Carolina seems like a nice place to live, as we both love mountains. I also noticed that she walks awfully close to me, and we had to walk through the mall all alone, so it looked like we were dating (which made me a little self-conscious). Usually when we walk together through the hall at school, she tends to slowly get closer and closer to me (I don't think it's on purpose) and I slowly move away because I fear that if we made contact, she will immediately pull away and I just felt like avoiding that (really I was doing this instinctively, but I came up with a reason as to why I did it). Today as we were walking through the mall, our arms were just on each other, and we didn't care. She was playing with a computer and I accidentally leaned in too close so my arm was on hers, but she didn't care. I really enjoyed the time spent with her and am glad my mom suggested I invite somebody. ;D
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 07, 2017, 06:59:07 PMSo I just spent pretty much my entire day hanging out with Sara. We were spending our day in a bigger city an hour south of us, I was getting my new laptop, we were looking at furniture, and I had a piano recital. Sara decided she wanted to tag along to watch my recital, which meant she was with us for the 6+ hour trip. One thing I noticed is that me and Sara seem to like to talk about houses, furniture, and places to live. We see a house that looks like a nice living spot and we start commenting on what houses look nice and if it's a nice place to live. We were walking through a furniture store, commenting on what furniture was nice (mostly the bizarre modern stuff) as well as talking about fun things you can do with them. In the past, we both decided that North Carolina seems like a nice place to live, as we both love mountains. I also noticed that she walks awfully close to me, and we had to walk through the mall all alone, so it looked like we were dating (which made me a little self-conscious). Usually when we walk together through the hall at school, she tends to slowly get closer and closer to me (I don't think it's on purpose) and I slowly move away because I fear that if we made contact, she will immediately pull away and I just felt like avoiding that (really I was doing this instinctively, but I came up with a reason as to why I did it). Today as we were walking through the mall, our arms were just on each other, and we didn't care. She was playing with a computer and I accidentally leaned in too close so my arm was on hers, but she didn't care. I really enjoyed the time spent with her and am glad my mom suggested I invite somebody. ;D
*Gives you an applause, and then secretly wishes something like that would happen to me*
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 07, 2017, 06:59:07 PMI also noticed that she walks awfully close to me
I have a bit of a problem where I walk into people a lot when walking next to them. Maybe it's that. Maybe it's maybelline.
If she friendzones you I swear I will find her and chew her out until she's guilty down to the bone.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 10:56:02 AMIf she friendzones you I swear I will find her and chew her out until she's guilty down to the bone.
... or people could just not be interested in a romantic relationship but still want to be friends???? That's actually kind of disturbing that you see "friendzoning" as such a bad thing.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 08, 2017, 11:00:06 AM... or people could just not be interested in a romantic relationship but still want to be friends???? That's actually kind of disturbing that you see "friendzoning" as such a bad thing.
I've seen it break guys' hearts before. Some people don't understand how much growth in the heart of a guy can be lost when a girl, all of a sudden, declares she and a guy, "friends". One minute she's head-over-heels, and the next, she's dumping him in the trash. Now, I understand that girls have the right to make such decisions, but it can be done without being a total you-know-what about it. Help him ease into it. Help him understand that he and you would not make a great couple any longer. Do NOT just strike him down out of the blue. That's "friendzoning".
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 10:56:02 AMIf she friendzones you I swear you need to be courteous and respectful of her decision. If you're lucky and show her respect maybe you two can remain friends.
ftfy
Quote from: Altissimo on May 08, 2017, 11:00:06 AM... or people could just not be interested in a romantic relationship but still want to be friends???? That's actually kind of disturbing that you see "friendzoning" as such a bad thing.
I agree, it's getting a little disconcerting seeing so many posts about how much you young'uns hope some girl is gonna start seeing you romantically.
I went through high school with about an equal number of male friends and female friends. It's actually
super cool having a bunch of friends who are girls (or the opposite sex) since you get a different perspective on things. I didn't think about pursuing any of them romantically because that would just corrupt that situation a little bit. My advice: don't go any sort of romantic route unless you've got a strong, purely non-romantic relationship firmly in place first, because it's so much more awesome that way.
QuoteI agree, it's getting a little disconcerting seeing so many posts about how much you young'uns hope some girl is gonna start seeing you romantically.
I went through high school with about an equal number of male friends and female friends. It's actually super cool having a bunch of friends who are girls (or the opposite sex) since you get a different perspective on things. I didn't think about pursuing any of them romantically because that would just corrupt that situation a little bit. My advice: don't go any sort of romantic route unless you've got a strong, purely non-romantic relationship firmly in place first, because it's so much more awesome that way.
I totally agree. It actually is pretty fun having a group of friends that are girls. They are just as fun to hang out with as guy groups.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:05:15 AMI've seen it break guys' hearts before. Some people don't understand how much growth in the heart of a guy can be lost when a girl, all of a sudden, declares she and a guy, "friends". One minute she's head-over-heels, and the next, she's dumping him in the trash. Now, I understand that girls have the right to make such decisions, but it can be done without being a total you-know-what about it. Help him ease into it. Help him understand that he and you would not make a great couple any longer. Do NOT just strike him down out of the blue. That's "friendzoning".
Tbh, if the guy gets so worked up about it, that's on him. She made her decision: the only real option is to get up and move on.
Also, didn't the term "friendzone" go out of style after 2013? I thought we all agreed to let the concept die.
Quote from: Yug_Guy on May 08, 2017, 11:12:01 AMAlso, didn't the term "friendzone" go out of style after 2013? I thought we all agreed to let the concept die.
It's a little sad that some people view a single term as something that should "go out of style", and assume that it applies to everyone.
Quote from: Olimar12345 on May 08, 2017, 11:08:04 AMIf she friendzones you I swear you need to be courteous and respectful of her decision. If you're lucky and show her respect maybe you two can remain friends.
Olimar, there's a difference between telling a guy nicely that a friendship work out better, and a girl turning into a total witch, telling the guy they should remain friends, never speaking to him again, and immediately finding another guy. You rewrote my concept there.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 11:08:50 AMIt's actually super cool having a bunch of friends who are girls (or the opposite sex) since you get a different perspective on things. I didn't think about pursuing any of them romantically because that would just corrupt that situation a little bit. My advice: don't go any sort of romantic route unless you've got a strong, purely non-romantic relationship firmly in place first, because it's so much more awesome that way.
I never said anything against friends of the opposite sex; I actually have quite a few myself. But don't think that either gender won't launch you into a full-blown romantic relationship, and then turn it around without warning.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:20:15 AMOlimar, there's a difference between telling a guy nicely that a friendship work out better, and a girl turning into a total witch, telling the guy they should remain friends, never speaking to him again, and immediately finding another guy. You rewrote my concept there.
Holy shit, since when is
this the friendzone? I thought it's always been known that "friendzoning" someone is politely (and perhaps obliviously) telling them that you should just be friends.
Because at 16 years old you've totally had enough life experience to talk about relationships.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:20:15 AMOlimar, there's a difference between telling a guy nicely that a friendship work out better, and a girl turning into a total witch, telling the guy they should remain friends, never speaking to him again, and immediately finding another guy. You rewrote my concept there.
(ftfy means "fixed that for you.")
Your perspective is so heavily set on one side of the coin that it worries me.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 11:24:57 AMHoly shit, since when is this the friendzone? I thought it's always been known that "friendzoning" someone is politely (and perhaps obliviously) telling them that you should just be friends.
Wait, really? You've never seen this? Man, you must have had a nice high school. I'm jealous.
Quote from: braixen1264 on May 08, 2017, 11:25:23 AMBecause at 16 years old you've totally had enough life experience to talk about relationships.
So sorry,
Wendy Walsh; I should have known that age is automatically justification to turn down someone's two cents. Please, let me bask in your implied vast knowledge and become a true
expert.
Quote from: Olimar12345 on May 08, 2017, 11:30:11 AMYour perspective is so heavily set on one side of the coin that it worries me.
I don't see how. I've already explained both methods of ending a relationship, good and bad.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:32:16 AMWait, really? You've never seen this? Man, you must have had a nice high school. I'm jealous.
No, I'm saying that your definition of the friendzone is completely wrong. What you're describing is just straight-up dumping someone.
Also, watch your tone, please, you're getting a bit hostile.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:32:16 AMWait, really? You've never seen this? Man, you must have had a nice high school. I'm jealous.
So sorry, Wendy Walsh; I should have known that age is automatically justification to turn down someone's two cents. Please, let me bask in your implied vast knowledge and become a true expert.
I don't see how. I've already explained both methods of ending a relationship, good and bad.
Chill, he's just implying that you're young and have more experiences ahead of you still.
And actually, I'm with dudeman here. This is what I thought it meant (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Friend_zone), and I didn't think there was some other meaning to the term.
Edit: ninjad
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:20:15 AMOlimar, there's a difference between telling a guy nicely that a friendship work out better, and a girl turning into a total witch, telling the guy they should remain friends, never speaking to him again, and immediately finding another guy. You rewrote my concept there.
If that's what's happening, then that's not what's happening. Picture it from the girl's perspective:
You make friends with a guy. You only want to be friends with him since for whatever reason you know it won't go any further than that. He, however, continues to act as though there is a chance with you. You try to make it exceedingly clear that you only want to be friends. He refuses to accept that. He reads hidden meaning into literally everything you do and is convinced you secretly love him and are being coy about it. You're not. You're just fucking not. You are being friends with him and holding him at arm's length and he is misconstruing it into romance. You make it clear you're not interested and he continues to push and push and push. It's getting fucking creepy. You are scared. He is not taking the hint and you are scared he is going to continue to think like this no matter how you react. You have tried everything to get him to understand that you are not interested, you just want to be friends. But at this point you don't even want to be friends because he is so fucking creepy. You are legitimately afraid that if you try to be more forceful he will begin to stalk you or threaten you. There is literally no recourse left to you but to cut off all contact with him.
If you think girls are in love with people and then turn around and become bitches for no reason, then
you are the fucking problem, because "girls who love you turning into bitches" is not a thing that happens. If women are in love they don't do that on a dime. They just don't. It is a gross misconstruing of the circumstances and a self-victimizing mindset. It is harmful to women everywhere and is exceedingly selfish.
I know this because it happened to me and I had to get campus police to tell him not to contact me anymore.
AMEN
Altissimo does it again [thumbs up]
As a married man myself, I must concur.
I also thought we debunked the whole 'friendzone' thing last week?
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 11:55:57 AMAs a married man myself, I must concur.
wait
stop
andy is married
wat
Yeah, we had the wedding this weekend. We went with the green and white theme suggestion in the end. I wanted to thank most of you for coming and of course to thank my best man THC (who broke the dress code by coming in red and black + yellow text).
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 11:55:57 AMAs a married man myself, I must concur.
...
...
...
...
Wait really?
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 12:00:06 PMYeah, we had the wedding this weekend. We went with the green and white theme suggestion in the end. I wanted to thank most of you for coming and of course to thank my best man THC (who broke the dress code by coming in red and black + yellow text).
I'm not sure if your serious. Like we were discussing this
literally just a few days ago.
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 08, 2017, 12:02:10 PMI'm not sure if your serious. Like we were discussing this literally just a few days ago.
Please avoid double-posting, thanks.
Also I just now remembered the joke discussion about this so now I just look foolish.
OH MY GEEZBISCUITS AS IF YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVE THAT BLOOP AND I GOT MARRIED AT THE WEEKEND WE'RE 'AVIN A TOSSIN' LAFF' INNIT111111
edit: dudeninjad
I apologize, everyone; I admit I got a little out of hand. I just wasn't sure what everyone's definition of "friendzone" is. I was just speaking what my school's definition was.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 12:36:38 PMI apologize, everyone; I admit I got a little out of hand.
Nay problem, dood. I'm the one using all caps ;)
dont act like a professional on any matter no matter how qualified you think you are. no matter who you are just assume youre wrong about everything. if you dont open your mind to other views you wont ever amount to anything more than just a fool
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 11:32:16 AMSo sorry, Wendy Walsh; I should have known that age is automatically justification to turn down someone's two cents. Please, let me bask in your implied vast knowledge and become a true expert.
also sass will never in any way help your situation so keep it to yourself if you dont want to kill your reputation
Quote from: braixen1264 on May 08, 2017, 01:06:58 PMdont act like a professional on any matter no matter how qualified you think you are. no matter who you are just assume youre wrong about everything. if you dont open your mind to other views you wont ever amount to anything more than just a fool
also sass will never in any way help your situation so keep it to yourself if you dont want to kill your reputation
I can agree with the "sass" advice, but assuming I'm wrong about everything? I'm no genius, but is there anything wrong with having just having a
little self-confidence? Some motivation? How's life going to get better if I walk around with no intention of speaking up or trying to improve myself; no plans on ever trying to show that I'm at least right about something, like a math test question or tomorrow's weather? No offense, but that's kind of a scary way of living in my book. I know I don't know everything, but good heavens, Braix.
Yeah braix your head is in the right place but you need to turn the pessimism down a notch
Quote from: Latios212 on May 08, 2017, 01:17:46 PMYeah braix your head is in the right place but you need to turn the pessimism down a notch
This. This isn't the Braix I'm familiar with.
You need another AmpharosAndy motivation session I see!
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 08, 2017, 10:56:02 AMIf she friendzones you I swear I will find her and chew her out until she's guilty down to the bone.
Plz don't chew her, she's rlly nice
Also, I'm obviously still clinging on to the chance of dating, though I try not to. The only thing that makes me not completely give up is that when she rejected me, she felt so bad, worse than I did actually. Also she only doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship
right now which makes me think she's saying, "maybe later?". Now, recently I have been able to see her and her actions more like a friend than anything, but that day just made me question her once again.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 08, 2017, 02:11:40 PMAlso, I'm obviously still clinging on to the chance of dating, though I try not to. The only thing that makes me not completely give up is that when she rejected me, she felt so bad, worse than I did actually. Also she only doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship right now which makes me think she's saying, "maybe later?". Now, recently I have been able to see her and her actions more like a friend than anything, but that day just made me question her once again.
Stop.She told you once before that she is not interested in a relationship. That's it. That's all there is to it. It means she
doesn't want to be in a relationship. It doesn't mean she's playing coy. It doesn't mean she might be interested in the future. It means
you are holding onto something that
doesn't exist and using it to justify not listening to her words, at all. It's not like she told it to you in Japanese. She told you she wanted to be friends.
That means she just wants to be friends.Ignoring the literal content of her words and remaining convinced that she's somehow lying to you is disrespectful and rude. It's telling her you don't believe she has the right to
know what she wants and communicate that clearly to her. It's telling her you don't want to listen to her because you'd rather delude yourself into believing
your version of events.
It's gross and it's creepy and it's the entire reason why girls do the thing that levi thought was "friendzoning."If you respect her as a person, as a human, as a
friend, AT ALL, you wouldn't do that to her. You wouldn't make her have to deal with this situation.
Even if "I don't want a relationship
right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future,
you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.Don't be creepy.
That goes for everyone.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 08, 2017, 02:18:42 PMEven if "I don't want a relationship right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future, you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.
I'm trying my hardest, okay?
Even if I stopped, it's still going to go on because my mom has to tell everybody that I'm in love, applying pressure to me. Anytime I mention her name, people have to remind me that I like her. Kids at school are starting to ship us and they're going to try and get us to date whether we want to or not. So it's not just me.
Alti the official Anti-Creep Minister of nsm.
Someday you'll say something with which I'll disagree. Until that day comes.
Can we get Alti a custom title that says "Relationship Guru" please?
It's that pink symbol under her username
Quote from: Altissimo on May 08, 2017, 02:18:42 PMyou are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.
Actually I just now saw this. I would like to mention that I do not act upon anything. Everything I post here is something that
she did and me being
hopeful. Now I try to look at her as a friend and can see that within her actions, but I also see the things she does that seems different than the way she acts with literally everybody else. That is why I sometimes think maybe she does like me more than just "friends". But even if I did date her, I'd still treat her like a friend (the way I treat her now) which is probably why I see things that might mean a relationship on her side.
Quote from: mastersuperfan on May 08, 2017, 02:35:04 PMIt's that pink symbol under her username
i fucking lol'd
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 02:31:05 PMCan we get Alti a custom title that says "Relationship Guru" please?
Actually, I disagree with her, at least in this situation. Normally I'd agree, but sometimes a person says they don't want to be in a relationship because they don't want to be in one in the present. In that case, they might want to be with the person, but feel they're not ready to be part of anything serious and are waiting to mature. This is most prominent in high school, which is where I believe Cash is. Again, I'd normally agree with what Alti's saying, but it's not always true, which she is saying it is.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 08, 2017, 02:38:13 PMActually, I disagree with her, at least in this situation. Normally I'd agree, but sometimes a person says they don't want to be in a relationship because they don't want to be in one in the present. In that case, they might want to be with the person, but feel they're not ready to be part of anything serious and are waiting to mature. This is most prominent in high school, which is where I believe Cash is. Again, I'd normally agree with what Alti's saying, but it's not always true, which she is saying it is.
I didn't say that, I said that
even if they ARE interested in a relationship in the future, you should still respect their fucking wishes for the time being and not continue to hold out for something that MIGHT happen.Right here:
QuoteEven if "I don't want a relationship right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future, you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.
Cashwarrior I know you're not actively trying to be sexist or creepy, but you need to recognize that as a man you will never have to deal with a LOT of things that women go through every day of their lives. It's not a personal slight, it's literally the way things are. You're subconsciously objectifying your friend. All we're trying to do is tell you that you need to think more about your behavior and recognize why it's a problem, because I feel like there's a wall there. It's not just about respecting your friend, it's also about valuing her and really women in general as much as you value yourself. You might think you do, and I understand that you're trying to, but you're not there yet. The fact that SO MANY of us who have been around the block and seen situations like this (especially Alti, who has her own set of insights because she's a woman who's been through this) are telling you your behavior is problematic should really make you start to question your logic here.
Quote from: Altissimo on May 08, 2017, 02:39:45 PMI didn't say that, I said that even if they ARE interested in a relationship in the future, you should still respect their fucking wishes for the time being and not continue to hold out for something that MIGHT happen.
Right here:
Oops, must have glanced over that part. Sorry. I know that a person shouldn't hold out onto something like that. It's always important to respect others' wishes in any instance. Except if it's about suicide and they don't want you to tell anyone. Then you should probably tell someone.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 08, 2017, 02:35:56 PMActually I just now saw this. I would like to mention that I do not act upon anything. Everything I post here is something that she did and me being hopeful. Now I try to look at her as a friend and can see that within her actions, but I also see the things she does that seems different than the way she acts with literally everybody else. That is why I sometimes think maybe she does like me more than just "friends". But even if I did date her, I'd still treat her like a friend (the way I treat her now) which is probably why I see things that might mean a relationship on her side.
Thoughts and actions aren't independent. Regardless of the literal actions she takes, your interpretation needs to avoid this "hopeful" thing. I get that us saying it doesn't make it easy, but you need to just forget the romantic part. Honestly, it sounds like you guys have a chance at a really good friendship. But if you've got this secret agenda (and you can't deny that exists; even if aren't directly acting on it), you're just going to insult her and mess up an awesome friendship.
Holy crap quadruple ninja.
And again.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 02:39:51 PMCashwarrior I know you're not actively trying to be sexist or creepy, but you need to recognize that as a man you will never have to deal with a LOT of things that women go through every day of their lives. It's not a personal slight, it's literally the way things are. You're subconsciously objectifying your friend. All we're trying to do is tell you that you need to think more about your behavior and recognize why it's a problem, because I feel like there's a wall there. It's not just about respecting your friend, it's also about valuing her and really women in general as much as you value yourself. You might think you do, and I understand that you're trying to, but you're not there yet. The fact that SO MANY of us who have been around the block and seen situations like this (especially Alti, who has her own set of insights because she's a woman who's been through this) are telling you your behavior is problematic should really make you start to question your logic here.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 08, 2017, 02:35:56 PMI would like to mention that I do not act upon anything. Everything I post here is something that she did and me being hopeful.
Maybe I don't respect women and maybe I'm objectifying them, I can't tell. But I can tell you that nothing here is anything that I'm doing to her. It's just me observing things she has done to me.
Ninja'd
Well I guess I'm just a big jerk and I shouldn't post anything about relationships because I understand nothing.
Quote from: mastersuperfan on May 08, 2017, 02:35:04 PMIt's that pink symbol under her username
Dang. I need to get me one of those.
Let's not get too uppity, doods. We donut want to cheese people off innit :) keep dose smiles innit yeh? I'm smiling :D
edit: what's the word for a group of ninjas?
All I'm seeing is good advice, Andy. Alti, Slow, and Zun were honest but were non-hostile about it.
I'm feeling a hostile tone, though.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 08, 2017, 02:46:15 PMWell I guess I'm just a big jerk and I shouldn't post anything about relationships because I understand nothing.
The point is not to insult you, and if I did, I sincerely apologize. But there's value in listening to people who objectively have more experience than you in an area, and it's almost frustrating when you reject advice. You may think that we don't know the nuances of your relationship with Sara, but trust me, your situation is not unique in many aspects.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 08, 2017, 02:50:47 PMI'm feeling a hostile tone, though.
From me, I'm sure. I'm not trying to be hostile, I can assure you, it's just that it seemed last time people said "she's not interested" it didn't really help so I was hoping being more blunt about things would. I understand that it may have come across poorly and for that, at least, I apologize.
I just feel slightly misunderstood and the use of swear words, bolded letters, and large paragraphs makes me feel attacked.
Ninja'd
Thank you for apologizing though, sorry for being stubborn.
Relationships is efforts innit.
Glad I don't have to deal with that pandemonium.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 02:57:41 PMRelationships is efforts innit.
Glad I don't have to deal with that pandemonium.
right cause ur married
sure.
Someday bloop's going to find that and I'll look like a right turnip.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 03:01:48 PMSomeday bloop's going to find that and I'll look like a right turnip.
I feel tempted to PM her the link, but I'm not going to.
For now...
Here, I'll cheer everyone up.
(something that will hopefully cheer everyone up) (https://www.instagram.com/p/BTopAP-F_-_/?hl=en)
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 03:26:08 PMyou wood nut
Can you start grammar goodly? Me no understand you say. Me think you meen "You would not", but me no comprende you grammar.
He's British. He wouldn't understand.
It had two meanings at the same time. Saying 'you would not' as well as calling you a wood nut.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 03:29:05 PMHe's British. He wouldn't understand.
Come at me scrublord, I'm ripped!
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 08, 2017, 03:36:52 PMa wood nut
I speak only a little British. What is the American equivalent of this insult?
An acorn
On topic, I think Alti is the Master of this topic. I respect you and your wisdom!
Yeah I don't really know anything about relationships, I try to avoid people as much as I can
While im here id like to ask a question thats been lingering in my mind for about 6 months. Why is it that I havent felt any attraction towards a girl in the past year? is this normal?
It's probably for the best, lol.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 08, 2017, 05:18:42 PMWhile im here id like to ask a question thats been lingering in my mind for about 6 months. Why is it that I havent felt any attraction towards a girl in the past year? is this normal?
Yes. It's called "haven't found someone you like, yet". Unless you've found yourself attracted to males. Then it's called bisexuality.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 08, 2017, 05:18:42 PMWhile im here id like to ask a question thats been lingering in my mind for about 6 months. Why is it that I havent felt any attraction towards a girl in the past year? is this normal?
Hell yes it's normal. You shouldn't expect to be attracted to someone at all times. In fact, if you were, it would probably be more of a bad sign than a good one.
No im definitely not bisexual. The weird part is that i can pin down the day it happened. One day there were 2 people i found attractive, the next day i suddenly just didnt.
Anyway maybe THC is right and i just havent found someone i like yet.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 05:26:01 PMHell yes it's normal. You shouldn't expect to be attracted to someone at all times. In fact, if you were, it would probably be more of a bad sign than a good one.
Exactly. I mean, look at me. I hadn't been attracted to anyone until the end of last year.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 08, 2017, 05:29:14 PMExactly. I mean, look at me. I hadn't been attracted to anyone until the end of last year.
Same with me! I'm not attracted to anyone and am totally not crushing on like 4 girls right now.
plz help me, I just want to see them as friends.
Does anyone on nsm want to make out w me I'm taking applications
what did i just read
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 06:19:57 PMDoes anyone on nsm want to make out w me I'm taking applications
You read that
Talking about the last 4 pages or so. At least it has to do with relationships this time.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 06:19:57 PMDoes anyone on nsm want to make out w me I'm taking applications
Way to be direct about it! X'D
Quote from: blueflower999 on May 08, 2017, 06:43:51 PMTalking about the last 4 pages or so. At least it has to do with relationships this time.
Oh lol. I like how it started all nice with me telling a story and it turned into an educational debate pretty quickly.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 06:19:57 PMDoes anyone on nsm want to make out w me I'm taking applications
Sorry, but you're not my type. I'm into two X chromosomes, I don't really like that Y crap.
yes but sometimes XY + XY = XXX if you know what I'm saying
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 07:15:47 PMyes but sometimes XY + XY = XXX if you know what I'm saying
you haven't changed at all have you
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 06:19:57 PMDoes anyone on nsm want to make out w me I'm taking applications
I'm happily taken but you're really cute <3
Quote from: blueflower999 on May 08, 2017, 07:18:39 PMyou haven't changed at all have you
does anyone truly,,,,, "change"
Quote from: Dudeman on May 08, 2017, 02:31:05 PMCan we get Alti a custom title that says "Relationship Guru" please?
oh
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 08, 2017, 07:15:47 PMyes but sometimes XY + XY = XXX if you know what I'm saying
ok for some reason i thought this was a joke about triple x syndrome/trisomy x and i was just like "no, i don't know what you're saying, that's just terrible" and then i realized *i* was the terrible one
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 08, 2017, 05:18:42 PMWhile im here id like to ask a question thats been lingering in my mind for about 6 months. Why is it that I havent felt any attraction towards a girl in the past year? is this normal?
yes. I'm in the same boat, bub.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 09, 2017, 01:33:30 AMyes. I'm in the same boat, bub.
...
...
...
...
What about Bloop?...
gahdingus. I'm never going to be able to say anything on this thread anymore am I?
wtf happened to this place? I was only gone for a day or two
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 09, 2017, 09:07:37 AMwtf happened to this place? I was only gone for a day or two
Sorry, Spartan; I started it. Alti got a little upset.
I mean when you try to give bad relationship advice when you have like 0 experience, I'm sure anyone would be upset.
and also when your advice says really, really bad things about your outlook on women, of which I am one
but yep, it's all my fault for "getting upset". Got it
What are you expecting, though? Unless you put an age or experience restriction on the thread then you're going to have people who don't know stuff. Don't chastise them for trying to help.
I like to say: you're always the expert on relationships until you're single again.
I am not the expert XD
This thread seems to have more arguments on it than any other thread. :V
these damn kids today are just too thirsty
Quote from: WaluigiTime64 on May 09, 2017, 12:55:46 PMThis thread seems to have more arguments on it than any other thread. :V
Because feeeelings hehe
Quote from: WaluigiTime64 on May 09, 2017, 12:55:46 PMThis thread seems to have more arguments on it than any other thread. :V
Well, love and relationships are purely subjective. They are made of peoples personal experiences and feelings, so no two situations are the same. So why argue about it, if there is no solid answer? No advice can help for all situations, though it can help you be familiar with similar situations so that you can have an idea on how to go through these situations.
Basically:
There is no point in arguing about something that is different for everyone, and not everyone is going to see stuff your way
QuoteI am using "you" and "your" in the same manner I would use "y'all" or "all y'all", so I am not targeting anybody.
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 09, 2017, 01:11:58 PMBasically:
There is no point in arguing about something that is different for everyone, and not everyone is going to see stuff your way
I vote we remove Alti from the position of Relationship Guru and give it to Spartan. A great example of what he said is how Alti said women like to be treated. 95% of the time what she said is true, but then there's instances like the one with one of my friends. She's dating a guy who cheated on her, lied to her, ignored her, said he still had feelings for his ex, and even said he didn't want to "really" be part of a relationship because he "always gets hurt". I think she may have finally come to her senses and dumped him, but for all I know, they could still be together. And that's not just a teenage thing for all of you who say "you're too young to have any experience". That kind of thing is unusually common. I have heard of plenty of adults, from many age ranges, that have been in similar situations.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 09, 2017, 01:25:34 PMI vote we remove Alti from the position of Relationship Guru and give it to Spartan. A great example of what he said is how Alti said women like to be treated. 95% of the time what she said is true
so what am I supposed to say? "yeah most women don't want to be treated like shit. Except for when they do"???? Like what the fuck is this supposed to mean?
Yes
of course everyone is going to respond to different things differently and
of course what works for some might not work for others but considering that, as you said, 95% of women want to be treated a certain way means it's
probably a good idea to treat any woman you might meet a certain way.
I literally don't understand your post here. Because I'm not accounting for literally every situation under the sun, apparently I'm wrong entirely???? I was correcting unhealthy misconceptions on the part of people who don't understand how their views are harmful to women.
I'm not offended that you "want to remove the relationship guru title from me" (whatever that actually implies, because it was never official to begin with; it was a couple people's acknowledgement than my advice was good advice), that's not why I'm posting, it's just that I think you're way off base in your interpretation of my posts in this thread.
Edit:
QuoteShe's dating a guy who cheated on her, lied to her, ignored her, said he still had feelings for his ex, and even said he didn't want to "really" be part of a relationship because he "always gets hurt". I think she may have finally come to her senses and dumped him, but for all I know, they could still be together.
This does not mean the girl
wants to be treated like shit. In fact, this actually seems like extreme emotional abuse on the part of the man. Emotional abuse works in such a way that the victim feels as if they will lose everything if they break up with the abuser, no matter how much the abuser treats them like shit.
I know this because it happened to me and it wasn't like I wanted to be treated like shit. So this isn't even a situation that "contradicts" anything that I've said before.
Quote from: Dude on May 09, 2017, 12:58:07 PMthese damn kids today are just too thirsty
thirsty
and stupid
QuoteShe's dating a guy who cheated on her, lied to her, ignored her, said he still had feelings for his ex, and even said he didn't want to "really" be part of a relationship because he "always gets hurt". I think she may have finally come to her senses and dumped him, but for all I know, they could still be together. And that's not just a teenage thing for all of you who say "you're too young to have any experience". That kind of thing is unusually common. I have heard of plenty of adults, from many age ranges, that have been in similar situations.
Personally I think (this is going to be subjective; an opinion) that you don't like or date a person just for their looks or money or if they infatuate you (that is how you get manipulated and exploited). I personally think that it is better to find one who has similar interests or (at least in my case) values and boundaries. I usually try to find someone (again, this is just me, idk about u guys) more...conservative. Christian. Friendly. Basically someone who you would regard as a "good person". Someone who cares. (Again, this is just my personal opinion. You can agree or disagree. You don't even have to notice this. I'm just throwing this out there and hoping I'm helpful["you" is used as being plural again])
QuoteYes of course everyone is going to respond to different things differently and of course what works for some might not work for others but considering that, as you said, 95% of women want to be treated a certain way means it's probably a good idea to treat any woman you might meet a certain way.
I literally don't understand your post here. Because I'm not accounting for literally every situation under the sun, apparently I'm wrong entirely???? I was correcting unhealthy misconceptions on the part of people who don't understand how their views are harmful to women.
I'm not offended that you "want to remove the relationship guru title from me" (whatever that actually implies, because it was never official to begin with; it was a couple people's acknowledgement than my advice was good advice), that's not why I'm posting, it's just that I think you're way off base in your interpretation of my posts in this thread.
Don't worry, I'm not trying to replace you, lol.
Plus, you do have good advice. It actually made me rethink how I act when my crush is around.
Also, I understand that you were trying to clear the air on the definition of "friendzone", which can also be very subjective. It's all cool.
Spoiler
Here is the Google definition of "friendzone", although idk if I 100% agree with it:
Quote a situation in which a friendship exists between two people, one of whom has an unreciprocated romantic or sexual interest in the other.
"I always wind up in the friend zone, watching them pursue other guys"
Guys, I think it's apparent that no headway is going to be made any time soon. I think Altissimo has the experience to back up her advice, and I think those of us on the younger side (you know who you are) are trying to argue outside of their realm of expertise in order to justify their feelings. Things are likely to get really ugly if this discussion doesn't stop soon. I'd advise settling your differences elsewhere.
Quote from: SpartanChief17 on May 09, 2017, 01:42:33 PMPersonally I think (this is going to be subjective; an opinion) that you don't like or date a person just for their looks or money or if they infatuate you (that is how you get manipulated and exploited). I personally think that it is better to find one who has similar interests or (at least in my case) values and boundaries. I usually try to find someone (again, this is just me, idk about u guys) more...conservative. Christian. Friendly. Basically someone who you would regard as a "good person". Someone who cares. (Again, this is just my personal opinion. You can agree or disagree. You don't even have to notice this. I'm just throwing this out there and hoping I'm helpful["you" is used as being plural again])
The problem is that some people can appear to be a good person on the outside but once you get to know them be manipulative and abusive. I mean, that's part of how abusers work. They have to pull you in
somehow and that's usually through some sort of charm or personality charisma. Relationships can go south even when they are based on personality rather than "superficial" qualities because some people are good at pretending.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 09, 2017, 01:43:13 PMGuys, I think it's apparent that no headway is going to be made any time soon. I think Altissimo has the experience to back up her advice, and I think those of us on the younger side (you know who you are) are trying to argue outside of their realm of expertise in order to justify their feelings. Things are likely to get really ugly if this discussion doesn't stop soon. I'd advise settling your differences elsewhere.
Yeah, you're right. I'm sorry, I'm just sick and tired of seeing all these horrifically bad statements about women being made in my presence and feel the need to correct them.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 09, 2017, 01:43:13 PMShut up children, the adults are talking.
tl;dr; version
Hey, don't put words in my mouth please.
Sorry.
...would you like something else?
Quote from: Dude on May 09, 2017, 01:47:55 PMSorry.
...would you like something else?
Spoiler
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Alti, I wasn't saying you were wrong entirely. I can understand how what I said is likely to be misinterpreted. I've never been very good at saying what I mean to say in a nonconfusing way. I meant that Spartan summed up everything in (in my opinion) the best possible way. You're typically right, Alti. I was just saying that when it comes to something like relationships, you can't really automatically assume what's going on, no matter if it seems completely black and white. Nothing is ever black and white and most problems stem from people thinking things are. I'm not accusing anyone here of thinking things are black and white. I wanted to clear that up because it does kinda look like I meant that, if I hadn't cleared it up.
I would talk about my relationship issues to move this on but I don't have any hehe
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 09, 2017, 02:02:22 PMI would talk about my relationship issues to move this on but I don't have any hehe
I hear ya, brudda.
Quote from: WaluigiTime64 on May 09, 2017, 12:55:46 PMThis thread seems to have more arguments on it than any other thread. :V
you obviously weren't here for the pre-election politics thread
Do friendship relationships count on this thread?
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 09, 2017, 02:12:32 PMyou obviously weren't here for the pre-election politics thread
It's pre-election time over in angles and the english citizens of nsm are going nuts innit.
innit?
...
nup
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 09, 2017, 02:15:58 PMDo friendship relationships count on this thread?
sure
Quote from: Altissimo on May 09, 2017, 02:17:10 PMsure
Awesome!
You'd think I'd have something to say wouldn't you? ;)
Quote from: Altissimo on May 09, 2017, 02:17:10 PMsure
Prepare for tons of Anton stories in the future! You have brought this upon everyone, Alti, in your confirmation of friend relationship stories.
Oh no....
....what have I done?
(Yay Anton!)
Quote from: Dudeman on May 09, 2017, 01:43:13 PMGuys, I think it's apparent that no headway is going to be made any time soon. I think Altissimo has the experience to back up her advice, and I think those of us on the younger side (you know who you are) are trying to argue outside of their realm of expertise in order to justify their feelings. Things are likely to get really ugly if this discussion doesn't stop soon. I'd advise settling your differences elsewhere.
MORTAL KOMBAT
Quote from: Altissimo on May 09, 2017, 01:46:23 PMbad statements about women being made in my presence and feel the need to correct them.
I gave up on this a while ago lol. responding to a lot of things actually, there's some things that only get through your head when you experience them firsthand (or sometimes never I guess)
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 09, 2017, 02:15:58 PMDo friendship relationships count on this thread?
yes!!!!! my fave
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 09, 2017, 02:49:30 PMMORTAL KOMBAT
You seriously need to fuck off. Just saying.
What actually qualifies as "experience"?
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 09, 2017, 04:05:14 PMWhat actually qualifies as "experience"?
I'd say having been in a relationship or two, being far enough past them that you can judge them with a clear eye and no bias for whatever reason, and I guess just also an understanding of the nature of relationships of your peers?? Maybe??? Idk
Quote from: Altissimo on May 09, 2017, 04:06:23 PMI'd say having been in a relationship or two, being far enough past them that you can judge them with a clear eye and no bias for whatever reason, and I guess just also an understanding of the nature of relationships of your peers?? Maybe??? Idk
I've only had two. First lasted about 3 months, I think. Second lasted maybe 1, but she left my school.
Quote from: Dude on May 09, 2017, 03:56:27 PMYou seriously need to fuck off. Just saying.
You seriously need to stop being an ass. Just saying.
Allllll y'all can chill the hell out
I'm not surprised at all that you of all people are defending him
Quote from: Dudeman on May 09, 2017, 04:15:36 PMYou seriously need to stop being an ass. Just saying.
hes right, MORTAL KOMBAT isnt really an acceptable way to settle differences
but what about kortal mombat
Quote from: Zunawe on May 08, 2017, 02:51:15 PMBut there's value in listening to people who objectively have more experience than you in an area, and it's almost frustrating when you reject advice.
I feel the need to express that you (plural) shouldn't expect everyone to follow your (plural) advice even if you (plural) have objectively more experience. People can be stubborn and don't follow your (plural) advice even though you (plural) are right. This either means that those people will figure out themselves that they are wrong while trying to do things their own way, or they will continue to be stubborn and getting frustrated about people being stubborn won't change the fact that they are stubborn.
In addition the situation of the people that you (plural) are advising may be different to how you (plural) imagine it. In this case you (singular) said:
Quote from: Zunawe on May 08, 2017, 02:51:15 PMbut trust me, your situation is not unique in many aspects.
and while this may be true, cash's situation is also not necessary as identical to the situations you (plural) have experience with as you (plural) think.
Finally, having more experience doesn't mean you (plural) are always right. It is possible that your (plural) experiences do not follow the norm, but you are projecting them to be the norm because you haven't experienced the norm.
I can imagine that it is frustrating when people reject your (plural) advice. However, people do not deserve to be treated hostile because they rejected your (plural) advice, even if you (plural) are right. If you (plural) are just going to be frustrated when people reject your advice they will end up not asking for your advice at all.
tl;dr People are not obligated to follow advice, and if it's frustrating when people reject your (plural) advice don't unload your frustration on them.
Hey look Davy popped in at 2 am posted 500 words and won the game
(singular)
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 11, 2017, 08:02:22 AMHey look Davy popped in at 2 am posted 500 words and won the game
Fuck, I lost the game.
Nobody said it was black and white. It wasn't that he was saying we were wrong, it's that he didn't seem to be listening. "Reject" may not have been the right word; "ignore" may be better.
Ultimately, there's no substitute for personal experience, and words can't impart wisdom. But it's always a good idea to listen to what somebody has to say. At that point it's completely up to you what to do with their perspective.
I didn't mean to tell him to follow the advice, but to ask him to acknowledge the message people were trying to get across, because he seemed to be missing the point.
(Sorry, cashwarrior, for talking like you're the absent subject of some big thing. Davy's post has kinda moved away from you specifically so I didn't want to drag you back in if this becomes a string.)
Quote from: Zunawe on May 11, 2017, 11:39:39 AMNobody said it was black and white. It wasn't that he was saying we were wrong, it's that he didn't seem to be listening. "Reject" may not have been the right word; "ignore" may be better.
Ultimately, there's no substitute for personal experience, and words can't impart wisdom. But it's always a good idea to listen to what somebody has to say. At that point it's completely up to you what to do with their perspective.
I didn't mean to tell him to follow the advice, but to ask him to acknowledge the message people were trying to get across, because he seemed to be missing the point.
(Sorry, cashwarrior, for talking like you're the absent subject of some big thing. Davy's post has kinda moved away from you specifically so I didn't want to drag you back in if this becomes a string.)
You worded this much better than I would've. I usually tend to be redundant and talk in circles. Say the same thing but different wordings (whaddaya know! I'm doin' it right now!)
Basically, good job explaining this.
Quote from: Zunawe on May 11, 2017, 11:39:39 AMSpoiler
Nobody said it was black and white. It wasn't that he was saying we were wrong, it's that he didn't seem to be listening. "Reject" may not have been the right word; "ignore" may be better.
Ultimately, there's no substitute for personal experience, and words can't impart wisdom. But it's always a good idea to listen to what somebody has to say. At that point it's completely up to you what to do with their perspective.
I didn't mean to tell him to follow the advice, but to ask him to acknowledge the message people were trying to get across, because he seemed to be missing the point.
(Sorry, cashwarrior, for talking like you're the absent subject of some big thing. Davy's post has kinda moved away from you specifically so I didn't want to drag you back in if this becomes a string.)
Thanks for clearing that up, Zunawe. I wanted to make sure that people here don't feel forced or pressured to follow advice, but since that wasn't the intention of your earlier post, I apologise for interpreting it like that.
I had a question: why on Earth do people cheat while dating? Is it that hard to just break up with your existing partner and start dating the one you want to be with? Is it so hard to stay content with who you already have? BTW, this currently has nothing to do with me. Just asking.
I think exactly the same thing, Levi. Some people are just unbelievably irrational.
While most of the time those questions would fit a cheating situation, there are times when a person cheats on their partner and deeply regrets it. While cheating may be something that is hard to forgive, if a person can even forgive it, it doesn't always mean that the cheater doesn't love his/her partner. People make mistakes. But most of the time, it's just an asshole or a bitch that can't bother to break up with their partner or wants as many partners as possible. And before people go using the "no experience" crap against my statement, I know people (that are not kids or teens, but mature adults) that have gone through the situation I specified. Just because I'm a teen doesn't mean I don't know things. What you guys forget is that we may know people who have been through certain experiences. I have never dated, and therefore have never cheated, so on a personal, yes, I don't have any experience. But, on a experience-in-general level, I do know things because of people I've been with through their situations.
All right, here's the basic motivation. Sometimes the charm that attracted one person to another starts to wear off after a considerable amount of time with that person. Let's say Person A was charmed by Person B and the two started a relationship. After some time, Person A still loves Person B, but the love has become more everyday and commonplace. Then, suddenly, Person A meets Person C. Person C is charming as well, and since Person A has missed that charmed feeling of attraction, they find themselves attracted to Person C. Their love for Person B might still be very strong, but it's not as fresh as the feeling they are now getting from Person C. At this point, Person A has several routes they may choose to take, but if you're asking about where the desire to cheat comes from, this is generally why.
I feel like I've heard that some people do it for the excitement that comes with having to sneak around like that. Which I kinda get but it's still a dick move lol
Let's just say we don't understand and hope it doesn't happen to us. It's just as fun as it sounds (being that it doesn't sound fun hehe)
I've literally had 5 different girls cheat on me with the same guy.
Ouch! At the same time?
No but it was one after the other.
Did that guy reeeeally not like you or something? It's very oddly specific
He was just an asshole in general. The funniest part was when the girls would realize this and try to come back across a bridge they'd just burned.
"Steady dating" in general is a bad idea while you're still young, especially for you folks in high school. The purpose of dating is more to create social situations that teach you how to interact with people of the opposite gender in a respectful way. It can also help you discover what you like in potential partners. Dating the same person constantly not only doesn't really do either of those, it can also be seriously taxing on one's emotional health. Some of my old buddies from high school have been called out for cheating or being players just because they went on a lot of dates.
So I'd say don't worry about it, just go on lots of dates and enjoy prom and each other's company.
That is all very wise, Noc. I agree. I'm just a find-one-cool-dude-and-stick-with-'em kind of guy but I guess most people don't seem to want that, especially at my age. A good friendship is always suffice so I'll go for that first hehe
I'm not against dating multiple people, but dating multiple people at the same time is just wrong.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 11, 2017, 02:22:47 PMdating multiple people at the same time is just wrong.
It's actually a common thing in many different cultures. For example, in many Native-American cultures, the chief would have multiple wives, often being sisters at that. I'm not saying I'm for polygamy, but I'm not against it, either.
If all parties agree, why is it wrong? Who says a romantic relationship has to be exclusive? And why is that for you to judge?
Quote from: Zunawe on May 11, 2017, 02:26:30 PMIf all parties agree, why is it wrong? Who says a romantic relationship has to be exclusive? And why is that for you to judge?
Exactly my point. It's not necessarily a bad thing. The only time it's a problem is if not all members are consenting. Also, for some reason, it's illegal in many places.
Uhhhhhh you wanna try saying that to any of the women here guys
I assure you you'll get some very insightful responses
Nothing about what I said is at all derogatory toward women. If somebody wants to have two simultaneous but separate relationships, and both their partners are aware and okay with it, there's nothing wrong with that.
If somebody wants to have a relationship simultaneously with many people, and everybody involved agrees, there's still nothing wrong with that because everybody involved is an adult who is making that decision consciously.
Notice the lack of any gender specification in the above statements.
If there exists a culture where men forcibly marry multiple women who don't want to be part of a polyamorous or polygamous relationship, that's bad, but not by the nature of the definition of polygamy.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 11, 2017, 03:20:15 PMUhhhhhh you wanna try saying that to any of the women here guys
I assure you you'll get some very insightful responses
Again, I'm not for polygamy, I'm just not against it. I really don't care, it's people's choices. Also, I said that it's only fine if all members consent. Besides, there are polygamous relationships with multiple men.
EDIT: Also, everything Zun said.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 11, 2017, 03:20:15 PMUhhhhhh you wanna try saying that to any of the women here guys
I assure you you'll get some very insightful responses
Uh but all they said was "having multiple partners can work" not "being a male and having multiple partners while the girls can only have 1 partner can work", the latter statement is extremely sexist but the former is neutral??
Quote from: Altissimo on May 11, 2017, 03:56:29 PMUh but all they said was "having multiple partners can work" not "being a male and having multiple partners while the girls can only have 1 partner can work", the latter statement is extremely sexist but the former is neutral??
Exactly. One of one gender forcing polygamy on multiple of the other gender is very sexist. But not if there's multiple of each gender or the previous situation with complete and total consent and also the possibility (and likelihood) that in the situation of polygamy there are most likely people who are attracted to both genders.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 11, 2017, 02:22:47 PMI'm not against dating multiple people, but dating multiple people at the same time is just wrong.
Depends on your definition of dating. In my opinion, you can date as many people as you want at once, until you're in a relationship with someone, at which point you shouldn't date anyone else.
this thread has been pretty weird lately
In terms of poly relationships, honestly if everyone is consenting and happy with it, I don't really see too much of an issue. While a poly relationship isn't something I'd be personally interested in, I don't see why I'd judge people on that criteria.
Quote from: Nebbles on May 11, 2017, 08:11:23 PMIn terms of poly relationships, honestly if everyone is consenting and happy with it, I don't really see too much of an issue. While a poly relationship isn't something I'd be personally interested in, I don't see why I'd judge people on that criteria.
Which is exactly why I don't understand why polygamy's illegal in the United States. I don't want to be part of a polygamous relationship, but I don't see why the people who do aren't allowed to.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 11, 2017, 08:13:25 PMWhich is exactly why I don't understand why polygamy's illegal in the United States. I don't want to be part of a polygamous relationship, but I don't see why the people who do aren't allowed to.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_right
Polygamy shouldn't be a crime. In addition, if,
and only if,
all parties consent, there's nothing wrong with it.
Quote from: Pianist Da Sootopolis on May 11, 2017, 08:16:05 PMhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christian_right
Polygamy shouldn't be a crime. In addition, if, and only if, all parties consent, there's nothing wrong with it.
interestingly enough, the word polygamy doesn't appear in that article
(https://cdn.meme.am/cache/instances/folder692/65671692.jpg)
Hah, youtube is a relationship for me.
Netflix sucks.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 12, 2017, 07:27:02 AMNetflix sucks.
For the life of me, I can't figure out why someone would say this, other than maybe an issue with pricing.
I feel like their selection is too small.
Netflix sucks.
Netflix took off the X-Files and I'm still upset about it :(
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 12, 2017, 10:25:30 AMI feel like their selection is too small.
Probably the only good thing about Netflix is the fact that you can order DVDs to be shipped to your house. When it comes to streaming shows or movies, though, choose something else, like Amazon or Hulu. :-/
Quote from: Nebbles on May 12, 2017, 10:52:36 AMNetflix took off the X-Files and I'm still upset about it :(
Bleh. Glad I already watched through it all already (even the ninth season!).
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on May 12, 2017, 12:56:23 PMBleh. Glad I already watched through it all already (even the ninth season!).
Netflix refuses to add on Season 4 of Agents of Shield. So I moved on to Amazon and have been watching Dr. Who.
Spoiler
Netflix actually has added some pretty great shows. Namely Sherlock and Gallivant.
But netflix only has 5 good animus
I guess this would have to do with relationships lol. Found this while reading through some of my English Literature homework:
QuoteIntimates
D. H. Lawrence
Don't you care for my love? she said
bitterly.
I handed her the mirror, and said:
Please address these questions to the proper
person!
Please make all requests to head-quarters!
In all matters of emotional importance
please approach the supreme authority
direct!-
So I handed her the mirror.
And she would have broken it over my
head,
but she caught sight of her own reflection
and that held her spellbound for two seconds
while I fled.
1932
netflix finally has all 4 seasons of phineas and ferb. That's probably worth 8 dollars a month
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 12, 2017, 07:16:43 PMnetflix finally has all 4 seasons of phineas and ferb. That's probably worth 8 dollars a month
You say finally as if they haven't been there for months, which they have.
Well, today I looked at Sara, and I realized that I do desire a relationship with her. In the past, I did just want to be friends, but now, I just want her affection. Now, this doesn't mean I'm going to start trying to take action to persuade her into dating me, or that I'm objectifying women and being sexist because I desire a relationship. This simply means that I am starting to feel the effects of rejection (after 5 months, too) now that I am longing for a relationship that will never happen. Sara confuses me. I decided to take note of every time she showed, or at least attempted to show, affection for me. First of all, the fact that she always wants to walk with me to class, ever since the first day we became friends, the fact that she wants to be around me made me feel like she liked me. During a school dance, I was being boring and depressed because I don't like dancing and everyone else wanted to dance. She was trying to convince me that I wasn't boring and she was having fun sitting with me on a bench, but I was being stubborn. She rested her head on my shoulder before jerking back as if she remembered she was trying not to show affection (and this was before she knew I liked her). Walking down the hall one time, I started to lag behind because she wanted to talk with her other friends and I didn't want to be reminded that she doesn't want to be around me, when all the sudden, she notices and reaches out for my hand (before pulling back because she remembered not to show affection). One time I was depressed and she was trying to comfort me, except we were in a situation in which I didn't feel like talking. She kept trying to get me to laugh by pulling me into her and her friends' conversation. I wasn't in the mood. Her friends decided to go sit with the rest of the band, and I didn't feel like moving (or being around people), Sara noticed I wasn't leaving so she sat with me. She kept trying to persuade me into sitting with the rest of the band where all my "friends" were (in reality, they were her friends and they wanted to talk and hang out with her, not me) and then resorted to poking me until I moved. I told her to just go and sit with her friends, but she said that she's not going to leave without me. Then there was the time at the talent show in which she briefly held my hand for comfort when she was nervous. And that's not the only time she comes to me for comfort, she frequently tries to contact me when stressed or worried (once she texted me at 3 in the morning, and then bumped the text one minute after when she knew I'd wake up). Sorry for rambling, I just wanted to share some good memories I have so I felt better about being rejected. Also, I wanted to start out happy before you guys try to crush my dreams again.
I see your guys' relationship kind of like PMD partners
Cash, not to tread on your experiences, but is it really necessary to post everything you've ever found attractive about Sara? It's really coming across as creepy and is probably breaching her privacy. Like, it's not really your business to publicly tell everyone about her life, especially if you're using her real name (which is likely). I don't think she'd be very happy to know that someone was publicly blogging about her private experiences with some guy.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:18:35 PMCash, not to tread on your experiences, but is it really necessary to post everything you've ever found attractive about Sara? It's really coming across as creepy and is probably breaching her privacy. Like, it's not really your business to publicly tell everyone about her life, especially if you're using her real name (which is likely). I don't think she'd be very happy to know that someone was publicly blogging about her private experiences with some guy.
You don't see me calling Pikachu by her real name. Or talking about her private life. Heck, I haven't even talked about her since that one long post I made here. It is a bit rude to tell everyone about her life without her consent.
THC, please stop turning every post into an opportunity to talk about yourself, thanks.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:25:41 PMTHC, please stop turning every post into an opportunity to talk about yourself, thanks.
The last sentence wasn't about me. And everyone knows the last sentence is the most important sentence. Besides, I hate talking about myself.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:25:41 PMTHC, please stop turning every post into an opportunity to talk
though that's not really fair I kind of do the same thing
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:18:35 PMCash, not to tread on your experiences, but is it really necessary to post everything you've ever found attractive about Sara? It's really coming across as creepy and is probably breaching her privacy. Like, it's not really your business to publicly tell everyone about her life, especially if you're using her real name (which is likely). I don't think she'd be very happy to know that someone was publicly blogging about her private experiences with some guy.
It seems to me like the root of this is that Cash is
really overthinking things. And, let me just say, taking such an analytical approach to people is not something you want to do. Trust me on this one.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 12, 2017, 08:27:03 PMThe last sentence wasn't about me. And everyone knows the last sentence is the most important sentence. Besides, I hate talking about myself.
THC, I'm serious. Every time somebody posts about something going on in their life, you find it necessary to hijack that conversation by changing the subject to your situation instead of talking about theirs. It's one thing to bring up similar experiences on the side to back up a point, it's another entirely to shift the conversation towards you. It's getting old, and I know I'm not the only one who's feeling this. If you could go ten posts without hijacking someone's conversation, that'd be great.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:30:31 PMTHC, I'm serious. Every time somebody posts about something going on in their life, you find it necessary to hijack that conversation by changing the subject to your situation instead of talking about theirs. It's one thing to bring up similar experiences on the side to back up a point, it's another entirely to shift the conversation towards you. It's getting old, and I know I'm not the only one who's feeling this. If you could go ten posts without hijacking someone's conversation, that'd be great.
I didn't realize I was doing that. I'm sorry. I was being serious. I wasn't trying to take the conversation away from cash. I guess I'll just let the rest play out. I'll just watch.
of note:
you started every sentence of that post with "I"
Cash, I know you won't like what I'm about to say but you need to let go. In fact, it would probably be best if you avoided Sara for a while (maybe a week or 2). You need to be able to come to terms with your emotions and find a way to deal with them without Sara around. I was in a similar situation once and it wasn't fun. I began to notice a pattern of being happy when I was around this person and worse and worse devastation when we were apart. The more I hung out with her, the worse it got. This sounds like what's happening with you. Simply take a break from the situation to reassess the situation. You'll feel much better about yourself.
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 12, 2017, 08:44:21 PMCash, I know you won't like what I'm about to say but you need to let go. In fact, it would probably be best if you avoided Sara for a while (maybe a week or 2). You need to be able to come to terms with your emotions and find a way to deal with them without Sara around. I was in a similar situation once and it wasn't fun. I began to notice a pattern of being happy when I was around this person and worse and worse devastation when we were apart. The more I hung out with her, the worse it got. This sounds like what's happening with you. Simply take a break from the situation to reassess the situation. You'll feel much better about yourself.
I'm not sure if complete deprivation is a good idea, but it would definitely help to do a mental reassessment of the situation and "simmer down" a bit, so to say.
You may be right BDS. In my situation I needed to avoid the girl I had feelings for for a month. Of course I had been steadily falling down the rabbit hole for about 2 years.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 12, 2017, 08:36:27 PMof note:
you started every sentence of that post with "I"
Hahaha I'm way too self centred in conversations and I consciously take note of how many sentences I start with I. Side note: I am fully aware of what I just did.
On topic, by the way you talk about her (extensively to strangers...) Sara's nowhere near as great as you think she is. You've rambled about her enough for me to notice that you are fixated upon little actions that might mean she likes you rather than her as a human being. I don't desire to draw the personal experience card but I was in a similar situation for years and as soon as you realise what you're actually doing/feeling you'll leave her alone and both be happier.
And THC you're a great bud buddy but diedman has a point whoops
Quote from: BoywithoutaFairy on May 12, 2017, 08:44:21 PMCash, I know you won't like what I'm about to say but you need to let go. In fact, it would probably be best if you avoided Sara for a while (maybe a week or 2). You need to be able to come to terms with your emotions and find a way to deal with them without Sara around. I was in a similar situation once and it wasn't fun. I began to notice a pattern of being happy when I was around this person and worse and worse devastation when we were apart. The more I hung out with her, the worse it got. This sounds like what's happening with you. Simply take a break from the situation to reassess the situation. You'll feel much better about yourself.
I dunno, last time I tried to do this, Sara was really worried about me. Plus, I don't really have anybody else I want to talk and hang out with. Actually, scratch that, I have another friend who's starting to hang out with me more than before, I'll hang out with her more. It's honestly going to be difficult to try and tone down when she is always trying to be around me, she's going to think I hate her, which is the last thing I want. I can try though, and we'll see how this week goes.
Quote from: Dudeman on May 12, 2017, 08:30:31 PMTHC, I'm serious. Every time somebody posts about something going on in their life, you find it necessary to hijack that conversation by changing the subject to your situation instead of talking about theirs. It's one thing to bring up similar experiences on the side to back up a point, it's another entirely to shift the conversation towards you. It's getting old, and I know I'm not the only one who's feeling this. If you could go ten posts without hijacking someone's conversation, that'd be great.
I was just looking through some topics and I noticed that many people are also doing this constantly, yet I'm the one who was called out on it. I'm aware that I am doing it now, which is why I'm about to say
On topic: It's probably not that good of an idea to avoid her, cash. You definitely should try to get your thoughts straight and also probably have a conversation with her. I know I probably won't have much of an influence in what you do, but if you still insist on avoiding her for a week, it's probably best to at least tell her first so that she doesn't think you hate her. Not like, "Hey, I was told I should avoid you for a week because I need to get my thoughts straight about you." More like, "Hey, there's been a lot going on lately and I think I just need to be by myself for week." Or something to that effect.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 13, 2017, 05:44:43 AMOn topic: It's probably not that good of an idea to avoid her, cash.
eyhhhhh I'd disagree with that one. Sometimes forcing yourself to take some time off the other person will help you move on (if you so desire) or at least get a new perspective on things. I think this is a case where it's a good idea.
I'll third what Ampharos and Altissimo said.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 13, 2017, 07:49:48 AMI'll third what Ampharos and Altissimo said.
I did say that if he was going to do it, he should tell her first. He should do what he feels is best. It's up to him and it seems like he already made his decision.
I don't really know, I mean, I haven't been having any problems with her ever since I started thinking about her in a "romantic" way. I do know that if I try to do anything, I'm going to screw it up. I've been trying to tell myself to think of her as a friend, and that only worked for a week or two. It seems like, for me, that not thinking of her in the way I feel about her makes my feelings for her stronger. Based on that logic, if I thought about her romantically (and still didn't take any action accordingly as I've been doing), then maybe it'll die out and problem solved. I don't think that'll work, but it's just an idea. The things you guys are telling me to do make sense, but when I think deeper into it, I feel like I've already explored those options and haven't gotten the desired result. I think I'd rather not have a war in my brain, tearing me apart, because whether or not I see her as a friend or as a person I love seems to greatly affect the way I act, think, and perceive things. You guys can go ahead and tell me I'm wrong, but I'm stubborn, you're not going to change my mind at this point.
Can't argue with that. Good stuff :)
I've had multiple people tell me different statistics, and I'm not sure how reliable the web is on this: What's the REAL percentages of couples that marry and divorce across the world?
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 28, 2017, 09:49:56 AMI'm not sure how reliable the web is on this
What do you think this Is? Your neighbor's barbeque? We are probably less likely to be correct about this than some site on the web. Watcha gotta do is look for this stuff on the web and try to find some sort of reoccuring data. While it may not be 100% accurate, it is still more likely to be than one site or us.
Over half of all marriages end in divorce is the statistic I've heard most
That's why you should never marry until marriage.
Cash with the official motto of this thread XD
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on May 29, 2017, 08:51:23 AMOver half of all marriages end in divorce is the statistic I've heard most
That's actually very scary.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 29, 2017, 01:38:40 PMThat's actually very scary.
Not really. Most of those marriages happened from being drunk or contain an abusive partner and a partner with Stockholm syndrome that eventually realized to leave the other.
source
Quote from: Dudeman on May 29, 2017, 02:54:49 PMsource
More of an educated guess than actual statistics. It's very possible (and likely) that I'm wrong, but I do have reasoning behind it. Therefore an educated guess.
An educated guess implies you have real facts and statistics to back those up, or at least an understanding of the trends if not formally calculated; not a gut feeling.
Very few healthy marriages end in divorce so it's not always a bad thing. Most people will do everything they can think of to save a marriage before resorting to divorce.
Quote from: MaestroUGC on May 29, 2017, 03:11:39 PMnot a gut feeling.
I never said it was a gut feeling. There are statistics and stuff that I've seen, but nothing concrete enough to consider "real" evidence. Therefore, it was an educated guess instead of undeniable fact.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on May 29, 2017, 06:59:19 PMVery few healthy marriages end in divorce so it's not always a bad thing. Most people will do everything they can think of to save a marriage before resorting to divorce.
Slow is right. It's a pretty common misconception that divorce is this horrible thing that ruins couples. There's usually a very good reason for people to have a divorce. And when there isn't, well, I don't know whay to say there.
First off, THC, I completely agree with your point.
However, I cannot allow your phrasing to pass me by...
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 29, 2017, 08:56:52 PMThere are statistics and stuff that I've seen, but nothing concrete enough to consider "real" evidence. Therefore, it was an educated guess
If you've seen 'nothing concrete enough to consider "real" evidence' you shouldn't claim to be making an 'educated' guess as your knowledge on the matter has clearly not been exercised. In simple terms: "I've not seen any evidence but my statement is undeniably well-read". It can't get more contradictory than that, my friend.
Welcome to England, have a biscuit.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 30, 2017, 02:48:43 AM"I've not seen any evidence but my statement is undeniably well-read".
But I have seen evidence. Just not enough to use as a source for my point. And I didn't say it was undeniable.
But if you can't source it, how reliable is that information.
Quote from: Dude on May 30, 2017, 06:01:08 AMBut if you can't source it, how reliable is that information.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 29, 2017, 08:56:52 PMnothing concrete enough to consider "real" evidence.
As you can see, I even mentioned it's lack of reliability. Why not ask Andy about this? He agreed with my statement, but also hasn't presented evidence himself. To make sure there are no misunderstandings in what I mean of him agreeing me, here is the quote.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 30, 2017, 02:48:43 AMFirst off, THC, I completely agree with your point.
I'd think that divorce would only be a last resort option.
there's also the fact that the divorce statistic accounts for ALL divorces as compared to marriages not just FIRST TIME divorces so it'll account for those people who go through like 50 different marriages in their whole lives, keep that in mind
@THC if you're going to claim that this is an educated guess "based on reasoning" what is the reasoning you need to at least say/source it, i mean you can't just come in and say "i think x. my sources are unreliable so i'm not going to show them. but i still have reasoning behind it" like bro that doesnt fly, either give your reasoning and/or sources or stop assuming you know The Truth (TM) and tryin to tell everyone why your truth is objectively superior, it's gettin real old real fast
but i dont give a shit since i hid off topic, i just am here on a whim
How many times have I said this? What I'm saying isn't the objective truth! I've said that multiple times! I've said that it was likely to be wrong, but it was just my standpoint!
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 29, 2017, 03:07:10 PMIt's very possible (and likely) that I'm wrong
I don't think my opinion is superior to anyone else's. No one has even said anything that doesn't coincide with what I said, and if someone did, I would trust their opinion on this matter more than mine.
My only issue is with the phrase 'educated guess' as it clearly isn't such, as the nature of your previous statements suggest.
Isn't it like saying,
"During the time I've been around you, you seem like a complete dipshit, but I'm​ not sure as I don't know your IQ."
Correct me if I messed up somewhere.
A truly educated guess cannot have unreliable sources. The end
Quote from: Dude on May 30, 2017, 01:03:18 PMCorrect me if I messed up somewhere.
You don't need a comma before 'but'
I think he does, it's the comma between the yous that isn't necessary
Sure
What are you talking about it's fine
Yeah, so "During the time I've been around you" is a dependent clause which needs a comma after it.
Learn to write English.
Do we need a grammar thread?
Nah because writing is subjective especially on the internet
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 30, 2017, 11:43:13 AMHow many times have I said this? What I'm saying isn't the objective truth! I've said that multiple times! I've said that it was likely to be wrong, but it was just my standpoint!I don't think my opinion is superior to anyone else's. No one has even said anything that doesn't coincide with what I said, and if someone did, I would trust their opinion on this matter more than mine.
Perhaps you could have avoided all this conflict if you had said something along the lines of:
Quote"I read (or heard from) something once that said that [insert fun fact or divorce statistic]"
. Makes it seem less likely to appear that you are stating something as if it is the Actual Fact.
Quote from: Dude on May 30, 2017, 02:42:41 PMYeah, so "During the time I've been around you" is a dependent clause which needs a comma after it.
If you find yourself correcting someone else's grammar during an argument, you've already run out points to counter with.
Quote from: LeviR.star on May 30, 2017, 03:41:54 PMIf you find yourself correcting someone else's grammar during an argument, you've already run out points to counter with.
dude wasn't correcting anyone's grammar
If anything, Andy started it.
what even proper grammar is
que pasa
I may have started it but I was provoked ;)
Quote from: Dude on May 30, 2017, 01:03:18 PMCorrect me if I messed up somewhere.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 30, 2017, 11:43:13 AMHow many times have I said this? What I'm saying isn't the objective truth! I've said that multiple times! I've said that it was likely to be wrong, but it was just my standpoint!I don't think my opinion is superior to anyone else's.
No, but you act like what you're saying is the gospel truth, whether you intend it or not. To be frank, it's hard to take a 16 year old seriously about a topic as complex and "experience-needed" as this. I used to be a know-it-all and proud when it came to this topic and I now that I see it in retrospect, I had no groundings to base my "wisdom" on. It wasn't until I actually
experienced a relationship that my pride was broken and I truly understood.
So you can't be upset at us for not 100% heeding to or loving your advice.
Maybe think twice next time, knowing that you may not be the most experienced or wise concerning this topic, before posting. Then again, maybe you are indeed knowledgeable on this topic. I don't know you. You could be married for all I know.
Just be tactful.
I'm not angry because you guys won't listen to my not-backed-up opinion. I would definitely trust any of you on this topic more than me. I just get very mad when people don't understand the way I mean things. I know It's completely my fault when people think I mean something one way, when I actually mean it another, but I can't help but get angry. It's natural to get angry when people misunderstand you, and that is something I have plenty of experience with, both with myself on the giving and receiving end. I didn't intend to sound like my opinion was the only thing that could possibly be correct. I believe quite the contrary to that.
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on May 31, 2017, 08:14:16 AMI'm not angry because you guys won't listen to my not-backed-up opinion. I would definitely trust any of you on this topic more than me. I just get very mad when people don't understand the way I mean things. I know It's completely my fault when people think I mean something one way, when I actually mean it another, but I can't help but get angry. It's natural to get angry when people misunderstand you, and that is something I have plenty of experience with, both with myself on the giving and receiving end. I didn't intend to sound like my opinion was the only thing that could possibly be correct. I believe quite the contrary to that.
I understand where you're coming from. And it's fine. I've done that before too. You didn't sound too much to me what you are being accused of. No enemy here.
Quote from: Maelstrom on May 31, 2017, 08:54:53 AM
This is all subjective. Not something to get into an argument about. You guys have made your point, and he's learned his lesson. Move on.
Quote from: AmpharosAndy on May 31, 2017, 05:18:53 AMI may have started it but I was provoked ;)
but I didn't mess anything up
Oh yeah, shit. I've got the German in my head whoopsy :P
Quote from: Sebastian on May 31, 2017, 06:43:56 AMIt wasn't until I actually experienced a relationship that my pride was broken and I truly understood.
juicy
Relationships are kinda meh until your significant other cleans your entire apartment while you're away and you realize you can never again exist as a functional independent lifeform.
First read: What a horrible person!
Second read: I can't believe that person would do that...
Third read: Oh, he meant that he/she physically cleaned the apartment...
Did you think he meant... mentally cleaning...?
Or am I missing something?
Quote from: E. Gadd Industries on June 02, 2017, 03:05:42 PMDid you think he meant... mentally cleaning...?
Or am I missing something?
I thought he meant cleaned out. As in took everything and left him to be alone forever.
I think your head is wired incorrectly
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on June 02, 2017, 02:55:41 PMRelationships are kinda meh until your significant other cleans your entire apartment while you're away and you realize you can never again exist as a functional independent lifeform.
Pretty much.
Quote from: SuperFireKirby on June 02, 2017, 02:55:41 PMyou realize you can never again exist as a functional independent lifeform.
O_o well, I guess I'm not one for relationships, then. Independence is a thing I treasure. (And no, I'm not trying to be a cheesy 'Murican in saying that)
Ya know, I feel like I need to get into a relationship to see why I shouldn't. It's painful to my brain to tell myself not to try and focus on getting a date when I so badly want one.
I blame society
Part of me tells me it's not a bad thing to get into a relationship, to experiment with people to find out more about yourself and your interests. The other part tells me that you shouldn't get into a relationship unless it's going to be the person you plan on marrying.
(Sorry for changing the topic to myself, I just had some thoughts that might start some interesting discussion)
Imo you need to be in few relationships before you're actually good at being in one. I found out how shitty of a boyfriend I made the first time I was in one (though I only realized it later on). Even my current relationship took a lot of work on my part to be good at it, going on 5 months together now. Obviously this isnt the same for everyone, but if you're an extremely independent individual like me, you'll most likely find some personal roadblocks regarding how you communicate with your partner.
My advice: If you see someone you fancy, ask them out! Being in a relationship can lead to a lot of personal growth, if you're willing!
lol u should absolutely have relationships that help you establish what you look for in a partner and realize how you act in a relationship, if you literally skip straight to "first relationship = marriage" then you're prooooobably not going to have a very good one. Lemme tell u if i had decided to stay with my first bf forever i'd have married an emotionally manipulative/abusive man with whom I had very few important things in common sooooo :^) :^) :^) :^) :^)
Okay, thanks for the advice!
You've got to get it wrong before you can get it right XD
I know that a high school relationship will likely just be a waste of my time and energy. I'm honestly just not willing to sacrifice that into a relationship like that just "to experiment" or whatever. Also I'm probably just a shit partner anyway.
But I don't think it's very logical for me to assume that I could get into and sustain a great romantic relationship when I go to college or something. I can't even sustain a friend relationship; I sit outside by myself during lunch because I just don't want to interact with people.
Realistically, I'll probably just stay alone even out of high school. I don't have the experience necessary to make a friend, not to mention a girl/boyfriend. Still, I feel that I would rather spend my time being involved in other things besides relationships.
The funny thing about making friends is that you don't need experience. Either you mesh or you don't. Assuming that you're never gonna have friends because you "don't have experience" is baloney. I mean, you're still here with us, right?
Yeah, we don't have to like you ;)
it's one thing on the internet, meeting someone in real life and talking to them is different
Being online is way more difficult; reading is hard, yo.
edit: cut this cuz a stalker flagged it to me! no shame has been incurred and a meaningful moment was created, but just gonna bring this down for safe-keeping
Quote from: daj on August 14, 2017, 12:02:14 AMIt's one of those rooms for one
what kind of college has these rooms
that aren't super expensive
QuoteJust wondering, and perhaps more so to the ladies out there...is there any other situation where you'd let a guy into your room and basically sit around with him for two hours? :p
snip
I think the best call in this situation is just to be honest. It seems like she's fairly comfortable around you, and you should let her know that you want to be in a relationship with her, but you feel like it's just not the optimal time due to the circumstances you described.
Yeah, I mean, why not just say it? Tell her that thing you told us about what you want. Talk to her about it. Because what else are you gonna do except leave it hanging or somehow get into a commitment you didn't want to be in.
Tell her you like her but you don't think right now is the best time for you. Maybe go on an official date first or something, I dunno. Context. But don't abandon it and leave her not knowing why and you not knowing if.
You can't ruin it by being honest and mature.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on August 14, 2017, 12:22:32 AMwhat kind of college has these rooms
that aren't super expensive
ftfy
Quote from: Zunawe on August 14, 2017, 01:14:57 AMYou can't ruin it by being honest and mature.
Genius
Theez guys know the bizniz
Open and honest communication is key, don't just try to figure out if she's into you like a high schooler would. That's just dumb. Make a move or tell her how you feel or ask her how she feels like a grown-up.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 14, 2017, 06:01:18 AMOpen and honest communication is key, don't just try to figure out if she's into you like a high schooler would. That's just dumb. Make a move or tell her how you feel or ask her how she feels like a grown-up.
Exactly the reply I needed, haha, thank you so much :)
Yeah! ^^ I'm not going to just stand about and play the whole "guess who has a crush on who" thing. I'm going to do something.
Emotions are irrational things I suppose, ahaha. Thanks for the wake up call ^^
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 14, 2017, 06:01:18 AMOpen and honest communication is key, don't just try to figure out if she's into you like a high schooler would. That's just dumb. Make a move or tell her how you feel or ask her how she feels like a grown-up.
That's some good feedback, Slow.
Looking back an hour later it was clear I hadn't had my coffee yet but even if it was harsh my basic opinion remains the same
Good luck!
Quote from: SlowPokemon on August 14, 2017, 07:31:30 AMLooking back an hour later it was clear I hadn't had my coffee yet but even if it was harsh my basic opinion remains the same
Good luck!
Was considering giving you an equally harsh retort for about a split-second haha, but hey, you can't deny good criticism when it goes down. So once again, thank you ^^
plus i've done music performance for long enough haha criticism is normal by this point
Aight so I've got this friend see and his dad died of cancer a while back
Obviously I have no clue how he feels about it but when I visited him in Minnesota we went to church together and I can tell that it's affecting him somehow
If your dad had died of cancer what would you want out of your friends
Like I haven't said anything like hey if you wanna talk I've got two ears I just kinda hang out with him like normally
Cause I also just hate being that fake person who pretends to be invested in another person's well being and is all nosy about it so I just wanna get some idea where the balance is
Speaking as someone who also has a (new) close friend who lost their father a couple of years ago: treat him normally, but be sensitive. Be willing to be a listening ear if he needs one, but don't go out of your way to bring up the subject. In all likelihood, he wants to live his life without constantly having to think about it. Be a pleasant distraction, but not an oblivious one.
I have recently developed feelings for a senior girl at my school. I should list a few things:
Now, before I begin, I should apologize for being so stubborn and passive-aggressive on this site. I am ashamed of the reputation I've set for myself here. I very, very rarely act the same way in real life, as my Christian parents were and still are very strict on enforcing moral values on my siblings and I. Frequently have I been referred to by adults and my classmates as "a sweetheart", "good guy", and "the nicest kid on the planet".
The List
- when my school marching band was on its Florida trip, one of my friends, who was walking around in my group, told me that this senior girl, named Hallee, (pronounced "Hah-lee") had told him she thought I was cute. Now, there seems to be a number of definitions for this term, but I was surprised and happy to hear this
- during that same trip, our whole band spent a couple hours at the hotel's pool. After the session, the guys in my room and the surrounding room had noted that this student named Joe, (who is as old as me,) had been checking Hallee out at the pool
- one day during the summer, while volunteer working with my drama director, I overheard that Hallee had been dating Joe ever since the Disney trip ended.
- during Choir another day, into the school year, we were singing "Battle Hymn of the Republic", and the trouble-making singers in the back of my section started this little dance they knew annoyed our Choir director. Pretty soon, everyone in the Bass section joined in, excluding myself, and our teacher, half-annoyed and half-somewhat amused, stopped everyone to tell them to quit dancing. She did, however, note that I was the only one not dancing, and said that, "Levi is one of the good ones. You wouldn't burst into dancing like they did, would you?" All eyes on me, I grinned, replied with "I hope not", and swiftly did one of the dance moves. Everyone, including our director, burst into laughter, and I could tell that Hallee was giggling, too
- the next day, at a football game, our marching band halftime show was cancelled due to rain, and we were given rags to dry out our instruments. Jokingly, I gave my friend, Charlie, a rag, twisted up, saying, "Your weapon, sir" in my best Alfred Pennyworth voice. However, he took this seriously, and started whipping it towards several freshmen boys. When Charlie told some of the upperclassmen girls that I had given him the rag, they dismissed him as kidding. Hallee then turned and told me, "Levi, you're one of the good ones!" as my choir director had said to me the previous day. My voice cracking, I said, "Really?", and she smiled.
More recently, I worked up the guts to ask her to homecoming last week. First, I asked Catherine, her friend, if Hallee was dating anyone, or if she had a homecoming date. Catherine said no to both questions, and then asked, "Do you like her? Are you asking her to homecoming?" I said yes and she got all giggly. She told me it was the sweetest thing she had ever heard. All day, I was super-nervous, and during Drama practice, I was feeling light-headed. As we were let out, I caught up to Hallee and asked her, with some hesitation, if she'd go to homecoming with me. She looked surprised, glanced backwards over her shoulder and said she would have loved to, but she had already agreed to go with some friends. She then smiled and said, "But thank you!" I smiled, thanked her back and set out for the parking lot, slightly disappointed but immensely relieved that it was over. The next morning, Catherine, still giggly, came up to me and said she wanted to be there when I asked Hallee to the dance. I broke the news that she had already said no, and she looked sad.
Part II
A few days later, everything was back to normal until I realized I was becoming nervous every time I encountered Hallee. Just the usual: my voice cracks, I stutter, and my head grows red and sweaty. I even got nervous driving to school, thinking about whenever I'd come face to face with her. Last Saturday, while our Marching Band had been at an all-day competition, I walked around with my good friends Sam and Molly, a senior couple that had been dating for an impressive 3 years. I began by saying I had a problem, and Molly immediately asked if it was about Hallee. Dumbfounded, I asked her how they knew, and she said, "I had heard it from Jenna, who heard it from Catherine," (Note that, before I made her promise, Catherine swore to me not to tell anyone.) That's when Molly and Sam told me that the main reason Hallee said no was probably because her ex-boyfriend, Joe, had brutally dumped her the day before school started, saying that he "wanted to focus on football". Hallee has apparently been heartbroken ever since. Molly then asked me if that made me feel better, knowing that she would have said yes had Joe not been involved, and I said that it made me feel worse. If there's one thing I didn't want to hear, it's that Hallee had been feeling heartbroken for so long. We then launched into a discussion about relationships. Sam had been very nervous 3 years prior when he asked Molly out, but she had been flattered by it. They noted that it makes girls feel good to see that guys have a bit confidence, but also to see that they make guys feel skittish when in their presence.
According to them, Hallee may not know that I like her, but now the news may be spreading. I don't want to come off as a creep; no one has ever seen me that way in real life. I'd like to find a little more confidence in talking to her before the news reaches back to her; just today, I went to my drama director's office to pick up my Fiddler on the Roof Set Construction Head crew notebook, but before I entered the door, I noticed Hallee, the Costumes head, was talking to the director, Mr. Untiet. My arms stacked high with binders and textbooks, I quickly backpedaled before either of them could notice me.
Speaking of Fiddler, I had hoped to get Motel's role and Hallee to get Tzeitel; my wish only came half-true, as she still got Tzeitel and I got a minor role. I know relationships don't come out of acting roles, but still, I was a little jealous.
There's got to be something I can do before I run out of time. I can wait for Hallee to get over Joe, but I can't control how quickly the news Catherine spread reaches her. Will she be flattered again, or dismiss me as heartless? What do I do?
In this scenario I think it would be wise to ask the magic chonch shell
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 25, 2017, 05:18:59 PMIn this scenario I think it would be wise to ask the magic chonch shell
I love Spongebob references, Noc, but this is a bit more serious than that.
Do nothing
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on September 25, 2017, 05:18:59 PMIn this scenario I think it would be wise to ask the magic chonch shell
I think you mean the almighty helix fossil
seriously though
It seems like you're taking the right actions thus far (at least, what could be expected of any normal person), but it also seems like maybe she's uncertain about things and either wants some time to be to herself or otherwise think things through. It doesn't seem like a bad thing to wait, and maybe try again later. Maybe she'll say yes, maybe she'll say no. From there, it's all up in the air.
A L L H A I L D O M E
I think the best thing to do in this situation is to remain a kind person and a good friend to Hallee even if she isn't looking for anything in the way of a relationship right now. If "news" reaches her that you have a massive crush on her (and you have a classic case of high school crush going on, buddy), I have no reason to believe that she'll find that "heartless." You couldn't have known about her situation with her ex and you're not going after this with exploitative or selfish intentions. She knows you're a good kid. Now, I'm not the kind to actively encourage high school dating (it's usually started by raging hormones, doesn't end well, and commonly creates ridiculous drama that quickly gets out of hand), but I wouldn't discourage you from being a selfless, thoughtful person to her (and anyone else for that matter).
Hope that helps, sometimes I start writing these things with a vague point and end up just going stream-of-consciousness and not really concluding adequately.
ninja'd, BDS is right too.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on September 25, 2017, 05:53:09 PMseriously though
It seems like you're taking the right actions thus far (at least, what could be expected of any normal person), but it also seems like maybe she's uncertain about things and either wants some time to be to herself or otherwise think things through. It doesn't seem like a bad thing to wait, and maybe try again later. Maybe she'll say yes, maybe she'll say no. From there, it's all up in the air.
Quote from: Dudeman on September 25, 2017, 05:54:05 PMA L L H A I L D O M E
I think the best thing to do in this situation is to remain a kind person and a good friend to Hallee even if she isn't looking for anything in the way of a relationship right now. If "news" reaches her that you have a massive crush on her (and you have a classic case of high school crush going on, buddy), I have no reason to believe that she'll find that "heartless." You couldn't have known about her situation with her ex and you're not going after this with exploitative or selfish intentions. She knows you're a good kid. Now, I'm not the kind to actively encourage high school dating (it's usually started by raging hormones, doesn't end well, and commonly creates ridiculous drama that quickly gets out of hand), but I wouldn't discourage you from being a selfless, thoughtful person to her (and anyone else for that matter).
Hope that helps, sometimes I start writing these things with a vague point and end up just going stream-of-consciousness and not really concluding adequately.
ninja'd, BDS is right too.
This helps a lot; I appreciate the advice. You guys are the best!
I've met up with a boy three times since meeting him last week and I really like him a LOT
Tonight we went on a movie date to see Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind in Japanese with subtitles and then we made out in my car
The only problem is that next week he's moving to japan for nine months sigh
This sounds like the start to a really good anime movie.
Just move to Japan with him it's the best place in the world
yeah they have anthropomorphized idioms
i do not wish to see the word anthropomorphized following any word, thank you very much
Quote from: InsigTurtle on September 25, 2017, 11:16:00 PMi do not wish to see the word anthropomorphized following any word, thank you very much
that would make it "idioms anthropomorphized" tho and that isn't what i said so ur fine
what about anthropomorphized shinto shrines
what about anthropomorphized topic derails
What about anthropomorphized I can't stay on topic to save my life
how do you even get into a situation where you have to stay on-topic in order to save your life
You'd be surprised.
Quote from: LeviR.star on September 25, 2017, 05:02:54 PMWhat do I do?
Always expect that they aren't interested in you in such a manner until someone decides to prove you wrong. End of the day, if you want to know something: Ask. There's not much to be lost by being matter-of-fact. Lay the facts out and get askin sum qwestuns innit.
Quote from: Dudeman on September 25, 2017, 05:54:05 PMNow, I'm not the kind to actively encourage high school dating (it's usually started by raging hormones, doesn't end well, and commonly creates ridiculous drama that quickly gets out of hand)
hooray I get to return to the topic I hate in order to address this! DOn't ask me why im here if I hate this topic i apparently hate myself too i guess.
Anyway I'd actually disagree with this! yes, all of those reasons you listed are true: started by raging hormones, doesn't end well, commonly creates ridiculous drama. That's all true. But I think
because of all that being true it also functions as a good learning experience. If you have a relationship that goes south, you can use it as an introspective time to think about - okay, why did it go south? is there anything I can do differently in the future to prevent it going south? What are my wants and needs as a human? - and in my opinion, it's better to focus on that while you're young and have no responsibilities (basically) than waiting on it! I mean, adult relationships can crash and burn too, except when you're an adult you might be... married/engaged, living together, have kids together, split finances, maybe you even crossed the country to be with them. None of that is true in high school. By getting the drama out of the way early (so to speak), I think you end up with a clearer head going into future relationships and have a better idea of both how to treat your partner in a relationship, or know how
you want to be treated, or know what issues there might be.
In my case, my high school relationship ended in flames and I grew deeply depressed and suicidal over it!
BUT it also helped me to recognize the signs of an emotionally abusive partner. Now imagine if I
hadn't had that experience and was now an adult living with an emotionally abusive man without realizing he was emotionally abusive (or, perhaps, realizing it after it was too late). The risks of trying to escape such a situation would be much greater now than they were when we were still minors in high school living with our parents. But now I'm aware of red flags and can call off things early if they look to be headed in that direction. Plus, the fact that it ended up with me in a terribly depressed/suicidal place means that the treatment I got for it has stuck, and now I think I know how I can deal with it if a current/future relationship were to end in flames, without going back to the same level of depression I had then.
Also, like I said, it helped show me what I want in a partner and kind of taught me what my relationship priorities are! And my current boyfriend fulfills a lot of them :B
That said it is still important to remember that high school relationships are dramatic affairs indeed. In order to
avoid getting depressed/suicidal like I did, it helps to remember that - this too shall pass. High school relationships rarely work out! That's okay! If it fails, don't get too upset: you have a whole life ahead of you to find other people to be with. Just live in the moment and accept things for what they are, and don't think too heavily about the future, or you'll get attached to one that might not happen.
Just my two cents.
That's some really really good advice, Alti. I don't think high school dating is entirely bad and I know it can work (my sister knows a couple who just graduated who are about the purest and cutest high school relationship couple you could ever find), but I've never really tried to figure out the benefits, if there are any. What you said is incredibly wise.
I'm probably going to be asking someone out for the first time next week sometime, wish me luck
Woooo! Good luck!
glhf
girl (let's hope) friend
how to grill?
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 03, 2017, 05:06:58 PMhow to grill?
http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?topic=7383.0
Sunday in the Park with George (Foreman)
Is it bad I knew exactly where that link led to?
Also, GOOD LUCK!
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 03, 2017, 04:46:39 PMI'm probably going to be asking someone out for the first time next week sometime, wish me luck
Good luck! :)
YES. Good luck.
Good luck, blueflower! Remember, even if they say no, life still goes on!
And here I am, not even close to that
yes you are
you are very close to blue
physically
Exciting times. My master tactics will win.
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 03, 2017, 04:46:39 PMI'm probably going to be asking someone out for the first time next week sometime, wish me luck
!!!!! GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!
everyone else take notes. nothing matters nearly as much as you think it does so if you know you feel a way about someone tell them!!! even if its just a compliment and not a full on attempt to date you never know what'll happen
She agreed to study for a test with me tomorrow night, so hopefully that happens and I don't make a fool of myself. Really nervous though. Might be a good opportunity to further the relationship.
Good luck, Blue!
Have fun kid ^^
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 07, 2017, 09:58:06 PMShe agreed to study for a test with me tomorrow night, so hopefully that happens and I don't make a fool of myself. Really nervous though. Might be a good opportunity to further the relationship.
Yesss. You can do it.
You gotta study up so that when you study you seem smart.
It wasn't quite one on one like I had hoped (she invited some other peeps) but it was still a good time. Need to think of other things to do with her that don't scream "I want to ask you out" but still allow for one on one conversation.
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 08, 2017, 10:19:27 PMNeed to think of other things to do with her that don't scream "I want to ask you out"
Nothing wrong with being plain about your intentions. I would do something much closer to screaming "I want to ask you out". Avoids all this 'does he like me blah blah blah' nonsense dunnit.
Quote from: blueflower999 on October 08, 2017, 10:19:27 PMIt wasn't quite one on one like I had hoped (she invited some other peeps) but it was still a good time. Need to think of other things to do with her that don't scream "I want to ask you out" but still allow for one on one conversation.
There's nothing wrong with asking her out. ;)
Quote from: Sebastian on October 09, 2017, 03:00:58 PMThere's nothing wrong with asking her out. ;)
True, but I think he just wants to time it right.
Quote from: Sebastian on October 09, 2017, 03:00:58 PMThere's nothing wrong with asking her out. ;)
(https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi64.tinypic.com%2F2evz14w.jpg&hash=640cc307aa96596fe15afa870ab2d74bef6be84d)
So, a little update on my situation
Longer
A little bit after my last big post here, we had our big Pep Rally day on Homecoming, so the school schedule (order of periods) was a little different. I was walking out of Intro to College Chemistry, said hi to a freshman friend of mine (also a saxophone bando, nice guy) when Hallee walked up beside me and began talking with me a little bit. Our conversation, which was centered mostly around the weather conditions for the evening, was short, but I somehow managed to keep a suave (as opposed to squeaky) tone of voice. I wasn't sure about the amount of eye contact; maybe it was because the hallways were busy and she didn't want to crash into anyone coming the other direction, or because she possibly was shy. We went about our separate ways when we reached a hallway intersection, but not before exchanging "have a good day"s. I remembered to smile. I can't remember how much she smiled, but that probably doesn't matter that much. My mood was instantly improved significantly for the rest of the day.
(Interruption: Our Thespian President, Claire, had assigned me to send out text reminders to everyone who had signed up for the Remind.com Set Con class. Hallee is one of them. I regularly send 4 reminds per week, or one for each Set Con shift, and usually send out friendly messages within, or reference lines or songs from the musical in a pun. Claire told me just yesterday that they make her day and that I should keep up the good work. Since today has no Set Con shift, I sent a Remind that said "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You're amazing, you know that? Don't let anyone tell you otherwise! Have a great day! You deserve it!". Untiet left a thumbs-up reaction on the message.)
Now, about a week later I was in Mr. Untiet's (my drama director's) office, talking with him a little bit about the musical's set design when she walked in. I said, "Hi there, Hallee!" in my friendly voice, and she replied, "Hi, Levi" back, in a little depressed voice. Now, I'm not sure if she meant for it to come out that way, but this concerned me a little (I'm waaaaay over-analyzing this). Even worse, last Saturday, when I was just beginning my Set Construction 8-hour shift (with a 1-hour break, of course) I was started off by cutting some plywood with a jigsaw. When I heard her set her keys down on the counter, I stopped, waved, smiled and greeted her in my usual way. That's when the most terrifying thing happened: she looked at me with the saddest face of hers I had ever seen, and simply waved. Mr. Untiet noticed and asked why she looked so sad, but I didn't overhear her answer, as I had resumed sawing. I was concerned for the rest of the day. Untiet told me at the end of it that she was apparently stressed over schoolwork and tired; I concluded that I probably wasn't the reason she looked so depressed to be there.
Unsure, I talked to Molly again on Monday night, and she told me that not only was Hallee stressed over Anatomy homework, but this annoying freshman committed hit-and-run on her car just the other day, and has been denying he left a huge gash in the back of it ever since, even after the police got involved. In other words, I was very unlikely to be the reason. I explained to Molly I wish I knew how Hallee felt about me, and that I wanted to be the sunshine of her day, every day. She suggested that I should try to start casual conversations with her now and then, and to be persistent, but not overly persistent. She also described Hallee as a nice and sweet girl, but also a "gentle little thing". What exactly this meant, I'm not sure.
There are multiple reasons why I seldom find the opportunity to talk to Hallee casually. Reason #1: We have only two classes together: Band & Choir. In Band, she sits in the middle of the room where the miscellaneous percussion instruments are, as she switched to xylophone or something after her junior year. When the walking instruments go outside to march, she and the other miscellaneous percussion either stay inside, or watch us outside. During Choir (she has a beautiful voice, by the way) she sits in the soprano section at the beginning and usually starts what appears to be homework on her Chromebook. I don't want to interrupt her. Reason #2: When she's not alone and busy, she's talking to her friends. If there's one thing I learned from my parents, it's that you don't interrupt a person when they're talking. She's always in a very happy when talking to her friends, and I'd hate to give myself a new reputation by ruining that kind of thing.
I can talk casually with anyone in school I know and have a short, friendly conversation, but I can't find the courage to have one with Hallee, even if I found the opportunity. Since Claire is one of Hallee's best friends, I've been considering talking to her about it, but I think I might want feedback here first.
Dude, don't overanalyze this. Honestly, trying to assess how she feels about you every time you come into contact with her is a terrible idea. Just be a good friend. Strike up a conversation IF you get the opportunity to, and don't worry about getting her attention.
I'm not paying attention at all tho
ugh sometimes I hate your username
Yeah yeah copycat
Quote from: LeviR.star on October 11, 2017, 03:56:23 PMSo, a little update on my situation:
I'm waaaaay over-analysing this.
ftfy
Quote from: LeviR.star on October 11, 2017, 03:56:23 PMI can't find the courage to have one ((conversation)) with Hallee
Imagine she's your mum. You don't get nervous talking to your mum. Problem solved ;) You'll probably dislike her as a person anyway.
Welp, band was a little busy today, so I'm gonna shoot for Choir. Mrs. Kardell is always a little occupied with something at the beginning of 4th period, so this is my chance. I just have to make sure I walk up to her sounding confident and cool, but not overly cocky. I will resist over-analyzing analysing her response. As far as I know, I'm still normal Levi to her. If I can talk to any girl, freshman or senior, I can talk to Hallee.
don't analyze your own response either. there's no sense in trying over hard to project a certain attitude tbh just be yourself and see if it works
I managed to talk to her 3 times in the past 2 days! Kept my cool, and started a little conversation this morning with her about the Halloween Marching Band show we're doing. It went well.
Tuesday, I'm going to ask her to be my audience for practicing my All-State etudes.
I'm sure she'll be honored to
I actually choked out "fuck" through my laughter when I read Dude's post
I feel so pissed of about that girl that I thought was interested in me. Obviously nothing happened. And I feel so pissed of getting dragged into a bunch of bullshit and nonsense because of her. So fucked up! You've just watched "Tobbe gets tricked into crazy dumb adventure part 2" yay :D...
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. You have a right to be upset, but it doesn't sound like it needs to be directed at her. You even say in this post you "thought" she was interested in you. People don't "trick" people into liking them just for the fun of watching them follow them around. Fine, I don't know the full truth and experience, but it sounds a lot like you're trying to blame somebody else for not liking you.
Gotta agree with Zun here. If a relationship didn't work out, immediately blaming the other person is unfair and unwise. Step back and reflect on yourself a little. Relationships won't solve your problems; solving your problems can lead to relationships, though.
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on October 15, 2017, 11:24:07 AMI feel so pissed of about that girl that I thought was interested in me. Obviously nothing happened. And I feel so pissed of getting dragged into a bunch of bullshit and nonsense because of her. So fucked up! You've just watched "Tobbe gets tricked into crazy dumb adventure part 2" yay :D...
Chiiiiiilll
Went to my marching band's Halloween Show this afternoon as Captain Jack Sparrow, complete with props and makeup. After the whole shebang, I walked up to Hallee and asked her, in my best Jack Sparrow accent, if she could direct me to the Fountain of Youth. She giggled and directed me to the water fountain.
I think I might be on the right track! :D
Sorry this is unrelated, more about relationships in general instead of romantic. Nothing seems to really be working out for me in regards to relationships so I thought I might ask for advice here
Spoiler
I've never had any friends in school and recently I've been wanting to change that, so I tried making some this year(as a Junior in High School). I did kinda manage to make one friend last month(he moved here from the Philippines last year), but I barely hang out with him anymore because I end up just spending my lunch break chatting on Discord and studying in the computer lab while he plays basketball in the gym. Now we just kinda talk a bit in class and during passing period and I don't exactly feel like prioritizing this relationship over study.
I even made myself join a couple clubs this year, but as much as I'd like to, I haven't been able to force myself to talk to anybody/make any friends.
I've always told myself that it's okay, that I would just make friends in college where I'll be surrounded by more like-minded people. But I think I'm realizing now that it's totally just my fault that I can't get close to anybody; Of course it's nobody else's fault that I have no friends. I'm trying as hard as I can to break out of my comfort zone and talk to more people but I can't bring myself to get any closer to people than just the "acquaintance" level...
Guys, I'm totally a loner and I don't like how my social life is looking. I liked to put on a strong face like "wow I'm so cool I can live life alone, I don't need to waste time on other people", but I'm getting the feeling that I'm missing out on a really big part of life right now, I'm getting lonely, and my future looks even lonelier
TLDR: If there's anything more I can do to improve my social skills, I get the feeling that I should do it before I graduate High School. I know there isn't really a formula for making friends(unfortunately), but any tips you guys might have to help me get there would be great. I don't want to be lonely my whole life.
I'm pretty much in that spot right now, except for college. There is no shortage of people I'm friendly with, but rather a lack of people I'm really friends with, except a couple people to varying degrees. My only advice is to just keep trying; even if you can only form a friend group with two other people, that's still something as long as those relationships are strong ones.
Quote from: Zunawe on October 15, 2017, 02:50:16 PMWhoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. You have a right to be upset, but it doesn't sound like it needs to be directed at her. You even say in this post you "thought" she was interested in you. People don't "trick" people into liking them just for the fun of watching them follow them around. Fine, I don't know the full truth and experience, but it sounds a lot like you're trying to blame somebody else for not liking you.
I think you guys are right. But it still really disturbs me.
I was a total loner for awhile to until I realized two things: People wont hate you unless you do something to intentionally hurt them and that being anisocial is a choice. Sounds kind of dumb but it worked for me, self confidence and knowing what you really want takes you far in life.
Quote from: FireArrow on October 16, 2017, 01:45:05 AMSounds kind of dumb but it worked for me, self confidence and knowing what you really want takes you far in life.
Y I used to have that, until I completely lost it. Due to me having strong unpopular opinions, which lead me to completely bleak out/away my opinions at all, because of fear of getting into bad situation.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on October 15, 2017, 11:28:56 PMI'm pretty much in that spot right now, except for college.
Snap
I'm just throwing dates and meets at people to try and get stuff going. If you ask what they're up to and they say 'not much' (as usual) that's when you say 'right then, I'll see you at eight!' Hopefully it should work XD
Quote from: LeviR.star on October 15, 2017, 09:43:01 PMWent to my marching band's Halloween Show this afternoon as Captain Jack Sparrow, complete with props and makeup. After the whole shebang, I walked up to Hallee and asked her, in my best Jack Sparrow accent, if she could direct me to the Fountain of Youth. She giggled and directed me to the water fountain.
I think I might be on the right track! :D
that's like the best thing you could've said, man that cracks me up. Good luck!
Late, but the best way to build social skills is to be around people. And the best way to be around people is to have social skills. It kinda sucks, but just hanging out with people you kinda know is not a bad thing to do. Heck, I made friends purely because I started sitting at the same tables of people I kinda knew for breakfast and now we're really good friends.
Braix — I realized a couple things after high school that made me become more social (though if you're like me then you won't ever really bean extrovert).
1. It's possible you're feeling subconsciously or consciously anxious or nervous about what people will think of you if you let them in and say what you honestly feel. Just think of it this way: what would you do if someone came to you with the same comments or personal problems? The truth is, the people who matter will support you, and the ones who don't support you just aren't even worth worrying about. Being yourself is the only way to make true friends.
2. Social anxiety is based on the inherent, illogical reasoning that everyone is constantly judging and being critical of you in some way. All I'm asking you to do is to try giving yourself the same validation you give other people. That's all. Treat yourself like a human being who's worth being heard.
3. Just existing in the same space as someone isn't enough. You need to make an active effort in the friendship. Oftentimes, that means pretending you're interested in things you aren't really, or listening to their problems. That's what friends do. It's give and take.
4. Don't let laziness and social anxiety stop you from going out and doing things when the opportunity arises. "I'll just stay home" is dangerous because it's safe and comfortable. Like you said, do your best to break from your comfort zone. (This is harder to do in high school but once you get to college it will be easier.)
Sorry if this isn't really the advice you were looking for, but that'll do it for now I guess.
Quote from: FireArrow on October 16, 2017, 01:45:05 AMI was a total loner for awhile to until I realized two things: People wont hate you unless you do something to intentionally hurt them and that being anisocial is a choice. Sounds kind of dumb but it worked for me, self confidence and knowing what you really want takes you far in life.
I mean, judgementalism and discrimination is a thing, and it's not just race based. Sometimes people "just get a bad feeling from you" or just think you're plain weird (but idk maybe that's actually true) and don't like you or want to be around you. I'm situations like that, your actions don't really mean much.
I don't want to complain or whine too much. But the thing is that I have met girls previously in school, which I thought I could get. But I never got any of them. Leaving me thinking that "there was something wrong with me" or "that I have to change myself. Or seize the moment". But I don't believe that will work. I think I just have to wait for it to come naturally and hope that some girl likes me.
When you say you want to "get" a girl, it sounds like you don't treat them like people...
Maybe if you stopped that kind of mindset you might find someone.
girls arent trophies to be won if you try hard enough
Basically that but said a bit more delicately
Quote from: Altissimo on October 16, 2017, 12:49:41 PMgirls arent trophies to be won if you try hard enough
Quote from: Dude on October 16, 2017, 12:46:10 PMWhen you say you want to "get" a girl, it sounds like you don't treat them like people...
Maybe if you stopped that kind of mindset you might find someone.
Tobbeh, you have to listen to these two, they make good points; it almost sounds like you want to have "a girl" just for the status of not being single.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on October 16, 2017, 10:47:46 AMI mean, judgementalism and discrimination is a thing, and it's not just race based. Sometimes people "just get a bad feeling from you" or just think you're plain weird (but idk maybe that's actually true) and don't like you or want to be around you. I'm situations like that, your actions don't really mean much.
People at my school seem to think I'm a drug dealer
Social isolation without showing overt signs of autism or depression is taken as a "too cool for you drug drealer." I know because that's what people thought about me too as a freshman >->
Quote from: braixen1264 on October 16, 2017, 02:46:15 PMPeople at my school seem to think I'm a drug dealer
don't give in to their expectations
say no to drugs braix
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on October 16, 2017, 12:22:41 PMI don't want to complain or whine too much. But the thing is that I have met girls previously in school, which I thought I could get. But I never got any of them. Leaving me thinking that "there was something wrong with me" or "that I have to change myself. Or seize the moment". But I don't believe that will work. I think I just have to wait for it to come naturally and hope that some girl likes me.
You've answered your own question by what you've said here.
You're treating women like an Xbox achievement that you get for doing something special.
Let me explain this situation:
I met a guy from a social dating app. We went on a date to go get ice cream. Things went well, we talked for about 3 hours. We met up again the next week to see a movie. We held hands during the movie. We got together at his house for another movie, and had a chat afterwards, again holding hands/cuddling through the movie. The next week we went and saw another movie together, again holding hands. 2 Fridays ago, I text him to ask if he's doing anything, he has to go to bed early for work the next day but says "Let's hang out next week for sure!" No contact since then, but he sent me a friend request on Facebook last week.
What is going on here?? I can't tell what this guy's agenda is. To me it seems he just wants to be friends, or worse, I'm just a hand to hold that's attached to a cute girl to sit next to at the theater??
It doesn't matter a whole lot since I'm moving away soon, but guys are hard to decipher sometimes! Any help would be appreciated, if only for future reference.
Quote from: ZeldaFan on October 25, 2017, 12:10:05 AMAny help would be appreciated
Just ask him plainly.
I get a lot of stick from people for my straightforwardness but it's useful in situations such as this. He has the information you seek so you need only ask. Confusion over.
^
pls no more of this "do you LIKE like me? hehe" shit
I think you're reading too much into it and you should just be straight with him about your questions? Overthinking isn't helping anyone.
Also I want to date that guy who moved to japan :( we still text some nights but since it's a thirteen hour difference, I'm always super tired right when he wakes up
Looks like I might finally get a chance to ask this girl out on Tuesday. Wish me luck lol
Ey, best of luck to you, my man!
Yessss, blue. You can do it.
Quote from: braixen1264 on October 15, 2017, 10:56:20 PMSorry this is unrelated, more about relationships in general instead of romantic. Nothing seems to really be working out for me in regards to relationships so I thought I might ask for advice here
Spoiler
I've never had any friends in school and recently I've been wanting to change that, so I tried making some this year(as a Junior in High School). I did kinda manage to make one friend last month(he moved here from the Philippines last year), but I barely hang out with him anymore because I end up just spending my lunch break chatting on Discord and studying in the computer lab while he plays basketball in the gym. Now we just kinda talk a bit in class and during passing period and I don't exactly feel like prioritizing this relationship over study.
I even made myself join a couple clubs this year, but as much as I'd like to, I haven't been able to force myself to talk to anybody/make any friends.
I've always told myself that it's okay, that I would just make friends in college where I'll be surrounded by more like-minded people. But I think I'm realizing now that it's totally just my fault that I can't get close to anybody; Of course it's nobody else's fault that I have no friends. I'm trying as hard as I can to break out of my comfort zone and talk to more people but I can't bring myself to get any closer to people than just the "acquaintance" level...
Guys, I'm totally a loner and I don't like how my social life is looking. I liked to put on a strong face like "wow I'm so cool I can live life alone, I don't need to waste time on other people", but I'm getting the feeling that I'm missing out on a really big part of life right now, I'm getting lonely, and my future looks even lonelier
TLDR: If there's anything more I can do to improve my social skills, I get the feeling that I should do it before I graduate High School. I know there isn't really a formula for making friends(unfortunately), but any tips you guys might have to help me get there would be great. I don't want to be lonely my whole life.
I know I'm super late to this, and Slow already gave some excellent advice, but here are my tips.
1. Making friends starts with interacting with other people. You can take the initiative by trying to talk to other people (for me, it usually works best to try to talk to someone who is alone) or by asking if you can join an activity that a group of people is currently doing. If someone else starts a conversation with you, try to keep the conversation going, because the longer the conversation goes, the more interaction you have.
2. In order to interact with other people, you need to have or create opportunities to interact with other people. Lunch break is a good opportunity to interact with other people, so if you want to make friends, you should try to interact with other people rather than "chatting on Discord and studying in the computer lab". I know it is tempting to spend moments like these alone when you don't have friends, but if you want to make friends, it is important that you don't spend these moments alone. You mentioned that you joined a couple of clubs, but that you haven't been able to force yourself to talk to anyone there. In that case, I'd suggest joining clubs where parttaking in the club creates interaction. For example, in a board game club just playing the games creates interaction.
3. Once you are interacting with people, you should try to meet them outside of the moments you see them regularly. You can try to schedule something yourself, but, just like with point 1, it's just as important, or even more important, to accept invitations. If someone asks you to do something together and you accept, they are more likely to ask you again, while if you reject the invitation, they are less likely to ask you again.
4. Finally, although I suggested a lot of things that require you to do something, only do something that you are comfortable with. Aside from the fact that doing things you're not comfortable with is not fun, it will also be appearant to other people that you are uncomfortable, and uncomfortable people are a lot less approachalbe than comfortable people.
I hope you use some of my advice.
Quote from: davy on October 30, 2017, 09:05:00 AMIf someone asks you to do something together and you accept, they are more likely to ask you again, while if you reject the invitation, they are less likely to ask you again.
...things are beginning to make sense
Alright, one final update on my situation. I have been typing this off-and-on for the past two months. I hate to type a lot, but these details are important. I'll put them in spoiler tabs. If you don't like to read a lot, please don't waste your time here.
Call me Tobbeh if you wantThe Details
It's been so long since my last post here, so I'll try to remember everything I can.
- on the day of All-State auditions, Mr. Untiet called me back to the Auditorium after we returned, just to talk with me for a little, as auditions and family visiting home had prevented me from working my usual 7-hour Saturday Set Construction shift for
Fiddler on the Roof. When I asked Claire, who was working, if Jace (her boyfriend) had told her he made All-State Choir, she told me they had recently gone through a mutual break-up. This was a surprise, as they were one of the happiest couples that I had seen in school.
- throughout the few occasions I walked up to Hallee to talk to her during downtime of musical practice, she either said she had to go use the restroom, or said she was busy organizing costumes (she was one of the costume heads)
- other times, I told her the best jokes I had, (as a friend of mine suggested it,) which made her smile, but I couldn't tell if it was forced or not
- on the night of the last dress rehearsal, I asked Molly afterwards if she could casually mention me in a conversation with Hallee and possibly find out what she thought of me. She happily agreed, and I could tell she was eager to help me. That made me feel better.
Hallee's Party
- at the second cast party, which was at Hallee's house, I noticed Josh, the freshman who hit-and-ran on her car, was "roasting" people from an audience in the living room. He had become cocky ever since he made a savage comment an earlier night, and people had named him the "savage Drama king". Since I had nothing better to do, I entered the room and listened for a bit. You see, the adults had read a "roast list" for the major characters at the first cast party, and Josh was just re-using them; for some reason, people were still impressed. In response to each roast, I muttered a comment to Lucas, who, after 2 of mine, announced to everyone that, "We've got some roasting the roaster!" and the cast and crew encouraged me to start a roast battle, to which I agreed. I let Josh start, as I'm better when prompted, and after only half the people heard my first roast and roared, the other half asked me to repeat it. I casually said, "Why should I be the one to repeat roasts? That's all Josh ever does anyway," which made the whole room go absolutely nuts (screams, people asking for high-fives & fist bumps, etc.) This went on for 2 more minutes, with me countering every roast Josh tried to come up with, until he eventually gave up, and everyone asked for a speech from me. I made it short and told Josh I didn't mean anything I said personally, and shook his hand, causing people to shout, "Yea! Good sports!" This continued on, with multiple people challenging me and supposedly losing, and with me interjecting into someone else's battle, just by standing up, which quieted everyone down quick. Eventually, Hallee came down the stairs to see what all the ruckus was about, as they told her upstairs that I was "spitting fire". She didn't end up hearing me roast anyone, but she apparently took their word for it.
- while visiting with the audience in the concourse after our third performance, I worked up the courage to congratulate Hallee on a good show, and she returned it, but with a somewhat pained look in her eyes. Her parents, who were standing close by, surprised me by asking if I wanted a picture with her, and we both agreed. Though, after taking the picture, I'd hate to think she was pressured in any way by her parents to take one with me if she didn't want to. She
seemed ok with it, but...
- while giving my freshman friend, Jamie, a ride to her church, she mentioned that at Hallee's party, she was upstairs with her and several other girls, playing Apples to Apples. When Hallee was asked if anyone else should join, she said that
I was welcome to, and that I was "too innocent" to be downstairs with everyone else.
- when I talked to another freshman friend of mine, Lucas, he mentioned that during one of the later rehearsals, while he was back running the sound board, Hallee and a few others were watching the "Tevye's Dream" scene, where I had one of my Rabbi moments. He overhead Hallee say that I was the cutest guy she had ever seen. This made me feel really good, but also confused.
- finally, about a month and a half after asking her to talk to Hallee, I checked back with Molly to hear if she found out anything, and she did. A few days before, she had gone to a sleepover with Claire and Hallee at Claire's house, and the topic of boys was brought up.
How She Felt About Me
Hallee apparently had a suspicion that I liked her. She said I was really sweet, but after Joe, her last boyfriend, she was very uncomfortable to start another high school relationship, and didn't know how to tell me, because she didn't want to hurt my feelings. She said she enjoyed getting Set Construction tools for me as my Secret Santa the previous year, and liked being my friend, but once I asked her to homecoming, she felt every one of our encounters was awkward and upsetting.
- at this point, I was desperate to erase what I had done. Molly offered to talk to Hallee for me, and I said yes, if she could explain that I just wanted to be friends again, and didn't want her to remember me as "that one guy that liked her at one point". I also asked if we could all 3 talk it over after Molly explained to Hallee privately, and she agreed. Before we parted that day, Molly said I was always welcome to join her prom group if I didn't find a date. I was very touched by this, but also unsure if I'd be going, so I thanked her and said I'd think about it.
- about a week later, Molly talked to Hallee, and Molly and I planned to talk with her at the Drama Christmas Party. However, she went to a production of Les Misérables out of town, and the only trace of her at the party was her last "Secret Santa" gift for her assigned buddy.
- because Hallee was in both Large Group Speech musical theatre and the "chromatic" division of jazz choir (I'm in two others of LGS and in the "pieces" jazz choir division",) finding her after school became increasingly difficult. On the last day before break, I found Molly and was about to plan with her to make that day the day, but I then noticed her crying. I asked what was wrong, and she said that she and Sam had broken up their +5-year relationship; this was shocking, as I never knew them separated, didn't usually see them apart, and never noticed any problems between them, even recently. So, I planned to talk to Hallee alone.
- after school, I called Tim, my "Box & Cox" partner (a 15-minute farce for LGS), explained my situation, and asked him to tell Hallee after Chromatic jazz that I would like to speak to her in private. He agreed, and before we hung up, he assured me I'd find someone.
- nearly sprinting down the halls, I came around the corner to encounter Tim and Molly, who told me they thought they saw Hallee leave. As Molly was about to offer me Hallee's phone number, Hallee came up behind me; Molly and Tim smiled, whispered, "You got this", and left.
Our Concluding Conversation
- I started off by apologizing to her for putting us both in an uncomfortable situation when I asked her to homecoming, and for being so awkward all that time. She replied that she didn't want to hurt my feelings, that she didn't hate or dislike me, and that, "It's ok; we're all a little awkward some point in our lives." I also told her I didn't wish for her to remember me as "that one guy that liked her at one point", and that I was willing to anything to make up for everything negative I had caused. She said that I was fine, and assured me it wasn't like that. Now, I had more to say to her, but she was apparently in a hurry, so I wished her a merry Christmas, and left.
So, over the course of several weeks, things started to get better; I was comfortable to go to band, choir, and Drama practice. I talked to her casually several times, made her laugh hard with Tim & I's scene and my Reader's Theatre, and even sang the national anthem with her at a swim meet. I thought things were going back to normal. I finally had the confidence I hadn't had since before homecoming, until my best friend told me something I didn't need to know...
Prom? No.
- one day, after talking to Untiet in his office, my friend Ethan told me something he heard. Apparently, the previous night, Hallee and Claire, both student directors, were talking during during Improv practice about prom. Hallee mentioned that she was going to ask me (of all people,) but was worried someone else would ask her first. I really wish he didn't tell me; I had just about gotten over her and wasn't experiencing any girl troubles, but that was all over. While I had never planned to ask her, (or anyone, at the moment,) my hopes were suddenly higher than needed. I was living, once again, in near-constant nervousness.
- the following Tuesday, my friend Darrian needed a ride to work, but before we left, he needed to grab his coat out of the choir room, so we went there. When we arrived, the girls were buzzing about prom, which revealed that on that day, Hallee had asked my friend Kyle instead. This hurt, as I thought she would have just went with her friends instead, like homecoming, and that if she was asking anyone, it would have been me. Now, that's not to say I always wanted to go with her, or that I would have gotten offended if she asked someone other than me, but Ethan sorta got my hopes up. For only a brief period of days, I thought I was officially in the clear.
My mother convinced me to try and ask a girl to prom. At first, I wanted to ask Claire, but when I checked with her mother, she said Claire already had a date from a different school, so that's that. After some long thinking, I decided I was going to ask a senior named Natalie; she's very much involved in Drama, volunteers for Mr. Untiet a lot, and has told me she thinks I'm quick-witted, sweet, and she likes my puns. I asked her by saying I was asking for a friend to find out whether or not she'd be going, and she said she was going with a group; I was disappointed, but so glad she didn't know I wanted to ask. I am currently thinking of other girls, but...
... despite this, I wish I knew how to make things between Hallee and I less awkward. I didn't want to ruin her senior year, but I feel talking to her before Christmas didn't change much; I mean, come on, the lack of comfort between us isn't something I can change straight away. In Peer Helper, we were told that an average of 20 positive encounters are needed to erase a bad impression of oneself, but if I talk to her too much, I'm afraid she'll think I'm pursuing her again. She's seen me act, sing, and interrupt band practice by playing a jazzy "Happy Birthday" rendition on solo saxophone for my band director. I have been told she thinks I'm a sweet and funny person, but that's not the point. What should I do?
mmm, juicy
1. senior prom is important. Go.
2. kids these days my goodness
3. a few people at my senior prom were actually really serious with each other, but I just went with a girl in the neighborhood who I didn't know that well, and got to know a few people in my group a bit better.
Now this is something I'm just experiencing after a couple years, but you tend to lose touch with people that weren't close friends in high school. I'm not in contact with anybody from knowledge bowl/track, or even really anyone outside a handful of people that I play league of legends with. So the most important thing is that you recognize that most of the interactions you make are temporary and are essentially for your own growth as an individual.
In my experience (maybe this is just because sexy noc) girls don't have a reason to say no when asked to prom. It's just too important of an event to pass up, so even if they're not really into you or looking at you as a potential date they'll still say yes if they don't hate your guts. In fact, it's totally okay to ask a more or less complete stranger to prom, or someone from a social circle outside of school. As long as you're in a group, everyone gets to interact and have fun. The point of all this is to just ask absolutely anyone you want to get to know better. If they end up being someone you like and want to ask out (and they feel the same way, of course), that's just a bonus. Since Molly(?) has given you a standing invitation to group with them, you might want to consider asking someone from the same friend group so it's a bit easier.
[Girl problems] is kind of hard. Just ignore the gossip (so-and-so told me hallee thinks you're cute (which, by the way isn't what you want to hear)) because even if it's true there's a reason Hallee didn't tell you this herself. From what I've read even if she does have interest in you (which seems minimal at best) she definitely isn't gonna act on it any time soon. If her and you are grouping together then it'll be easier to talk to her because it's more open and not just you and her. Just please don't dance with her. If there are any times during the day that you see her without it being too crowded, just say "hey how's it going" and "cool" or "sucks" depending on how she answers.
tldr, mikey says
ask someone to prom and don't sweat it, unless price is a thing then sweat it a lot
just be nice to hallee and don't seek her out to make things better cause it'll make things worse
Wow. That is a lot. Gonna be honest, tl;dr.
Quite frankly, whatever it is that's got you worked up, you're thinking
waaaaaaay too hard about. There's really no point in being wishy-washy or anxious about this kind of stuff - just go up to whomever and just tell them how you feel/what's on your mind/that you wanna go to prom with them or whatever. Worst-case-scenario, they just say "Good to hear, but no thank you". It's your one time being a teenager - enjoy it while it lasts instead of wasting it by fretting over little things.
Quote from: LeviR.star on February 14, 2018, 11:45:34 AMCall me Tobbeh if you want
Hey, at least you had the decency to put it in spoiler tags. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Too much wurdz
not gunna bee zucsessful look at urself in da mirrer
wood u liek u
nah
get
As always, Andy articulates the situation better than any of us could ever dream of.
As for my two cents (since I read through it), I do think you're overthinking this. Although you don't want Hallee to see you as "the guy who liked her once", I'm afraid you still are. Don't worry too much about prom. Just go and have a good time; hang out with your friends and value the moment without thinking about what impact it will have on the future. I agree heavily with Noc that your interactions in high school are more practice for your interactions in the future than they will build lasting relationships. A few, maybe. As a final note, do nice things for the sake of doing nice things. Don't get too focused on the impact your actions have, especially on specific people. Be happy that you make life better for everyone.
I did an anti-prom in high school, where a bunch of us got together and did a scavenger hunt. Good time was had by all.
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 15, 2018, 09:17:20 PMI did an anti-prom in high school, where a bunch of us got together and did a scavenger hunt. Good time was had by all. I'm pooped!
Ftfy
So this is simple I guess. There's a girl i like but i might be moving in a few months. If i do move we'll be at the very least 4 hours away from each other. Given that is it even worth it to tell her?
live while you can don't stew in regret
The fact that you posted here means you really want to, just follow your instincts kid ^^
Quote from: Trainer Ave on February 26, 2018, 11:04:16 AMGiven that is it even worth it to tell her?
Yes. "You'll miss 100% of the shots you don't take."
Quote from: shadowkirby on February 15, 2018, 09:17:20 PMI did an anti-prom in high school, where a bunch of us got together and did a scavenger hunt. Good time was had by all.
When did you do this? I also did an anti-prom scavenger hunt, but you were not a part of it...
...what?
Quote from: Kman96 on March 08, 2018, 01:59:09 AMWhen did you do this? I also did an anti-prom scavenger hunt, but you were not a part of it...
...what?
when people don't know they know each other innit
now
THATZ a
relationship! thread
Well, Ig this is a necrobump, but there is a girl at My school that I have a crush on, and I think she kind of likes me too. Well before I told a friend of hers about it, and since I would act pretty nice around her she was suspecting I might like her, so one day she asked that friend If I liked her, and she said yes, and I think it creeped her out a but at first. That was a while ago though, and I have changed, and improved, and have become more confident, and I can tell she is starting to like me, so I was thinking of wright in a valentine's day card for her, but am trying to think of what too wright, I DO NOT want to come off as creepy or anything like that, I've thought of some stuff, but I was wondering if any of you have any good ideas for that. As I said I do think she is starting to like me.
Will it be anonymous or not?
These depress me because they kinda sound like something I would say lol. (ESPECIALLY that second to last one)
Spoiler
(https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/honest-valentines-day-love-cards-58947d0600745__700.jpg)
(https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/01/funny-valentines-day-cards-66__700.jpg)
(https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/funny-valentines-day-cards-fb__700.jpg)
(https://i.pinimg.com/originals/90/d0/22/90d0228a4697c1007ca7fa4b7a4c1c6c.jpg)
(https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/honest-valentines-day-love-cards-58947c9ecd219__700.jpg)
(https://i.huffpost.com/gen/1611999/thumbs/o-VDAY-CARD-TOGETHER-570.jpg)
And this thing...
(https://static.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uuuploads/funny-valentines-day-cards-hubbawelcome/funny-valentines-day-cards-hubbawelcome-1.jpg)
Hmmm, I was thinking about saying something about how I like her, or admire her because she is a very smart, and humorous person, but I'm trying to come up to that conclusion in the card, and don't know exactly how.
Hmm, it's hard to help come up with a conclusion to a piece of writing that we can't see...
But maybe kinda sum it up with something like, "but anyway, I just wanted you to know that I admire you and" maybe add one more thing here. Maybe something about their feelings toward you or hoping that they will "accept this token" of your admiration or something. Feel free to change the words to better suit the language in the rest of your card. Just make sure to give credit!!!...
I was joking... BTW
Well, this is seriously all I've got so far. On the front it says Happy Valentines Day! Then on the inside I started with [name]. What I am trying to say is I know how to say I like her, but I don't know what to say before that to get to that point. It's kind of been stressing me out. i mean, do you think something like this would work? example, [name], I just wanted to say, I think you are a very smart, humorous, and sweet person, and I admire you for that. So I just wanted to say happy valentines day.
-[my name]
Maybe it should have some humor in it, hmmmmm I'm still thinking, and deciding.
Yeah, that example sounds awesome. Maybe remove the "so" in the last sentence. It sounds like a filler word. Or maybe change the last sentence to something like "I like you and I hope you have a great valentines day."
Basically, just make sure to tell her to "have a nice day" in some way.
You don't have to listen to me, these are just my ideas. I just wish I had the courage to try some of my own ideas. Lol (somehow, that was a sad lol)
Anyway, feel free to change it to better suit your personality.
Just remember the 4 rules of valentine's day cards (from-guy to-girl edition):
1. Be frank, don't use filler words, and don't beat around the bush, it may come across as weak or awkward.
2. Tell her WHY you like her not just that you like her.
3. Make sure to wish her a good day at the end.
4. Before you finish, imagine you are the receiver of the card and gauge how you feel about it. If you feel the same way you want them to feel about it then you did a good job.
Thank you so much for your help! I'll do it! one question though, should I change anything or is that totally fine what I've got? I mean is this genuine enough? I mean it seems kind of short, but it might be good enough.
Yeah, just remove the filler parts like "I just wanted to say" and "so" in the last sentence. Valentine's day cards are meant to be short and sweet unless it's a poem then it can be all different lengths.
Good luck and tell us how it goes!
Thank you! And yes, I will say. Just to let you know ahead of time, I'm actually homeschooled, and how I know her is through a home school group that I go to every monday called Classical Conversations, but anyway she won't get it till monday.
That really neat! I homeschool as well and go to a homeschool group called "Homeschool Academy" (slow clap for creativity) every Thursday. I don't really like anybody in particular there but I guess I must be really attractive (I'm pretty sure I'm not) cause it seems like every month someone is telling me "so-and-so likes you" "so-and-so has a crush on you". I legit get sick of it. Before, I was worried I'd never find someone that likes me.
When I was a kid, I figured I'd just go with anybody (take what I can get, you know?). Now I have OPTIONS and I have to have much higher standards than "take whatever I can get".
I would say it has something to do with the fact that I am president at my homeschool group, as well as the head of the newspaper and the retired "only person who is allowed to play the piano at recess guy", but it's not just at my homeschool group, it's everywhere!
#highschoolsucks
#sorryfortherant
;D kind of the same way with me, but I do want to make sure she does really like me first. Not to long ago she just kept talking about me she tried to call me twice, was texting me. I told her a joke then she told me a joke. But I'm a little confused, maybe it was just this joke or something, but we were having a conversation the other day on Google hangouts, (2 days ago) sent her a joke, and she said, "wow just wow, that's not even really funny." This was the joke Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what? Not responding for a little while seems to make her get more interested in me. So just to joke about myself afterwards I just said, ehh bad jokes are a specialty of mine.
Wow just wow, our situations are so similar that's not even really funny. ;) 8)
:D yah, if she doesn't respond, and yes I've researched this DO NOT RESPOND AGAIN TO HER UNTIL SHE RESPONDS BACK! This will make her have to reach out to you, and make her want to talk to you, and yes this has worked for me. sometimes it may take several days, but it worked!
Well, Thanks for all your help Bobby!
Learn to play crazy frog on the piano and do it non-stop.
My two cents incoming ~~
Inkling, you should consider this not a matter of "getting her to like you more", but more of a matter of how comfortable she would be with the idea of pursuing a relationship with you. Her opinion of you is, while mostly modeled after how you may have acted/talked around her, not something you can control. At this point, I would suggest not changing a thing about you and just waiting for her response. If she decides she'd like to try going out with you, you're golden; just don't try to accommodate anything during the relationship if you feel you're not being "interesting" enough for her. If she turns you down, no matter how she does so, it will be your duty to respect that decision of hers and move on. Agree to remain her friend and don't make a huge deal about it. If that's how you react, it's more than likely she'll respect you for being mature and won't think much of the whole ordeal.
Remember, it's not the end of the world if she says no. You'll have plenty of other chances with the rest of the fish in the sea.
More like words of wisdom incoming.
This was my first thought when you said that but I didn't know how to put it into words. Thanks, Levi.
So... *ahem* What he said!
Quote from: LeviR.star on February 12, 2019, 12:28:13 PMMy two cents incoming ~~
Inkling, you should consider this not a matter of "getting her to like you more", but more of a matter of how comfortable she would be with the idea of pursuing a relationship with you. Her opinion of you is, while mostly modeled after how you may have acted/talked around her, not something you can control. At this point, I would suggest not changing a thing about you and just waiting for her response. If she decides she'd like to try going out with you, you're golden; just don't try to accommodate anything during the relationship if you feel you're not being "interesting" enough for her. If she turns you down, no matter how she does so, it will be your duty to respect that decision of hers and move on. Agree to remain her friend and don't make a huge deal about it. If that's how you react, it's more than likely she'll respect you for being mature and won't think much of the whole ordeal.
Remember, it's not the end of the world if she says no. You'll have plenty of other chances with the rest of the fish in the sea.
I totally agree with that, and whatever happens it's not the end of the world, there are plenty of other girls out there in this world if this really ends up not working out.
It's no problem, thank you for listening.
It almost makes me cringe reading my past posts in this topic. The last time it blew up here, I was confused and thought that respectfully rejecting a person and "friendzoning" were two different things -- I had something going on in my life at the time. Emma, who I had initially developed an infatuation for because I thought she was lonely, turned out not to be the girl I thought she was. Over time, I finally came to terms with the fact that she was extremely antisocial, that she didn't believe she had any real friends, and was constantly speaking her mind with no filter. By the time I eventually had no feelings left for her, I learned that she had been secretly telling nasty jokes about me, whether it was about my short-lived obsession for Kirby, or my naturally-hushed voice (she even went as far as making jokes about the size of my privates, even though we were never possibly that close.) The whole experience shaped my perception of rejection in an entirely negative way, until I eventually fell for Hallee for a bit (that's another story).
I'm not proud of my past, and I'm sorry for anyone who had to deal with me during that time, but I can only hope that you can stray away from the misconceptions that I made.
I did have a crush on this one girl before, but my problem was I was being needy, and insecure, and so it never really turned out to become a relationship, but I have learned a lot from it, and have made major changes in my life since then. TBH I think we all have made plenty of mistakes that we are very ashamed of in the past. You know I think she actually does kind of like me again since I have changed, but I don't really know that we ever would get together again (Although we were never actually gf and bf, but we were getting pretty close to that point.)
Just popping in here to say that it might be wise to alter names of people you know irl for their own privacy. I'm not suggesting anyone here's a stalker or would use this information against people, but it seems like a respectful thing to do when talking about people who don't know you're talking about them publicly in very personal ways.
Also, while I won't dictate anyone's choices, I will say that I advise against high school dating unless you're already extremely close to someone. An overwhelming majority of high school relationships crumble apart quickly because they're based mostly on feelings and urges rather than appreciation for a person's talents and personality. I do, however, highly advocate making good friends with people of the opposite sex, even if those friendships don't go anywhere past friendship. I'm 21 now and in an extremely healthy relationship, and it disappoints me a little how often I see people coupling up without really knowing each other.
TL;DR, be smart, make friends, don't make a long-term relationship the focus of your interactions with someone.
I changed the names to [name] , yah I do see your point, most relationships actually do start off as really good friendships. My mom said that that's how her, and my dad went about it before they started dating.
Quote from: Dudeman on February 12, 2019, 01:41:59 PMAlso, while I won't dictate anyone's choices, I will say that I advise against high school dating unless you're already extremely close to someone. An overwhelming majority of high school relationships crumble apart quickly because they're based mostly on feelings and urges rather than appreciation for a person's talents and personality. I do, however, highly advocate making good friends with people of the opposite sex, even if those friendships don't go anywhere past friendship. I'm 21 now and in an extremely healthy relationship, and it disappoints me a little how often I see people coupling up without really knowing each other.
TL;DR, be smart, make friends, don't make a long-term relationship the focus of your interactions with someone.
I agree 333,331%. People (especially people around my age) don't seem that understand that love, at first sight, isn't love, its a chemical imbalance that results in infatuation. Once the infatuation stage ends (around 6-9 months into a relationship) the chemical's effect wears off. This is when most relationships end because they start having second thoughts because they think they don't love each other anymore (love is an action, not a feeling) and are forced to think logically about the situation, unlike before. If the couple realizes this and talk it out and stick with it the can have a happy life together, unfortunately, most people are not aware of this or even prefer to remain ignorant. Afterward is the phase where you treat your partner well, regardless of the chemicals in your body (if you didn't already drop out of the relationship at this point). After that is when you would get married and start making longterm changes. Getting a bank account together, having kids, and other stuff. (I may have messed up some of the technical details with the chemicals, but the general idea is still correct.)
Nowadays people get married in the first phase and get a divorce in the second.
That's a prime number!
Maybe it's In your description, really IDK I'm totally just guessing. ;D
Quote from: Bobbythekid21 on February 12, 2019, 02:34:06 PMI agree 333,331%. People (especially people around my age) don't seem that understand that love, at first sight, isn't love, its a chemical imbalance that results in infatuation. Once the infatuation stage ends (around 6-9 months into a relationship) the chemical's effect wears off. This is when most relationships end because they start having second thoughts because they think they don't love each other anymore (love is an action, not a feeling) and are forced to think logically about the situation, unlike before. If the couple realizes this and talk it out and stick with it the can have a happy life together, unfortunately, most people are not aware of this or even prefer to remain ignorant. Afterward is the phase where you treat your partner well, regardless of the chemicals in your body (if you didn't already drop out of the relationship at this point). After that is when you would get married and start making longterm changes. Getting a bank account together, having kids, and other stuff. (I may have messed up some of the technical details with the chemicals, but the general idea is still correct.)
Nowadays people get married in the first phase and get a divorce in the second.
You make a great point here.
Personally, I find that it's smartest to go in the order of "think, do, feel" as a general rule for all things in life. I find it funny that many people think before they do something, but then when it comes to love/relationships, they wanna do it backwards: feel, do, think. Just something interesting I thought I'd share.
Quote from: Sebastian on February 14, 2019, 04:05:03 PMYou make a great point here.
Personally, I find that it's smartest to go in the order of "think, do, feel" as a general rule for all things in life. I find it funny that many people think before they do something, but then when it comes to love/relationships, they wanna do it backwards: feel, do, think. Just something interesting I thought I'd share.
I agree with you too, I did make a good point... Oh, and about what you said. ;) :D
very well said.
Honestly, hearing people talking about how most people go based off of feeling before thinking makes me scared. I'm in a high school relationship right now, and we started dating because she apparently developed a crush on me and although I knew her as a friend, I realized that I didn't know her as a person. So I decided that I will pursue a relationship with her and see if I like her as a person. As of right now (about 4 months in the relationship), I get the feeling that she goes by feel, do, think. I often think extensively before doing anything with anyone ever, and sometimes I start doing an action, but usually I stop to think before going further. I've learned a bit about her (I think, she doesn't talk about what goes on in her mind) and I like being around her, she's fun and interesting to talk to, and I absolutely admire her determination and talents. HOWEVER, since this is my first relationship, I often find myself wanting to rely on feel to receive appreciation from her, and already that caused a little problem when she was stressed out and depressed for a month and I was too focused on the fact that she didn't want to hold hands. I feel like I've been doing better with this since I acknowledged that it had happened and I'm trying more to focus on the things she says. Whenever we have conversations in which information about each other is shared, or if we're just sitting in the same room, working on our own things; that is when I enjoy her the most, not when we're holding hands. I'm scared the relationship isn't going to work out since it started in high school and in 6 months, it'll be a long term relationship.
Quote from: Bobbythekid21 on February 12, 2019, 02:34:06 PMOnce the infatuation stage ends (around 6-9 months into a relationship) the chemical's effect wears off. This is when most relationships end because they start having second thoughts because they think they don't love each other anymore (love is an action, not a feeling) and are forced to think logically about the situation, unlike before. If the couple realizes this and talk it out and stick with it the can have a happy life together, unfortunately, most people are not aware of this or even prefer to remain ignorant.
(Can't believe I'm quoting myself.)
'Nuff said.
Well, I understand that. What I want to know is, in your opinion, does it sound like our relationship is being ran off of this effect or do you feel that with a little more time we'll be good?
Well, If you really want MY opinion (which isn't worth much in this case, I assure you), then I think that you realize the order should be "think, do, feel" like Seb said, not the reverse, and your friend is simply ignorant of the facts, you don't need the facts because you already think first. I think that the only way that ANY relationship can last through the post-mortem phase (the second one, where the chemical's effects wear off) is if they are aware of the scientific facts (the ones mentioned in my earlier post) or just believe in working through a relationship rather than abandoning it if they get just a little offended.
Well that girl I was telling you guys about ( actually had a make up day for my home school group on Wednesday due to bad weather, and the teachers one daughter having the flu) but anyway one thing I noticed is that she seems to be interested in me, she keeps looking at me at class every so often for a while, kept trying to make conversation with me, and specifically telling me things, and kept trying to make jokes with me. I didn't give the card to her yet, but I will on monday. She even sat next to me in class.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on February 14, 2019, 05:38:20 PMWell, I understand that. What I want to know is, in your opinion, does it sound like our relationship is being ran off of this effect or do you feel that with a little more time we'll be good?
A relationship can be whatever you want it to be. Love is a choice, not just a feeling. Yes, there can be feelings, but remember to base your relationship in valuable things (kindness, compassion, patience, common interests, etc.) and not in just the fuzzy, warm feelings. If you just base the relationship on warm, fuzzy feelings, I don't believe it will last.
Quote from: Sebastian on February 15, 2019, 07:05:55 AMA relationship can be whatever you want it to be. Love is a choice, not just a feeling. Yes, there can be feelings, but remember to base your relationship in valuable things (kindness, compassion, patience, common interests, etc.) and not in just the fuzzy, warm feelings. If you just base the relationship on warm, fuzzy feelings, I don't believe it will last.
That is very true, and I have gotten to know her, and she has gotten to know me for a while now, about half a year.
Yeah, taking it slow isn't a bad thing, especially if you're high school-aged.
Ugh, I have a fever, and can't go to class on monday. Well, funny thing is I told her about it, and she wished me to get better soon. Fever is miserable, first my dad had it, then me, and my mom is starting to get it too.
Oof that sucks. Hopefully you won't be sick for too long
Don't know why I got to it so late, but I'm finally making the card! I seriously also don't know why there was a break this Monday, last week I had the flu, and then there was a make up day before that. Oh well, it will be a belated valentines day card! Hey, I was also just telling her about the arrangement I am writing, and she said she thinks that it's pretty cool! Anyway I'll tell you guys how it all goes!
Anti-vaccer problem
Is he antivaccer? You can still get the flu if you've had a flu shot
I was just teasing either way
I don't generally talk about this stuff because it is very controversial, but I don't get the flu shot, and I've only ever had the flu twice in my life, this being the second time of course. Yah I knew you were teasing anyway.
I don't get it either
both the shot and the flu
Oh My goodness! She really seems to like me! She was happy to get the card, and from what a friend of hers at lunch was saying it sounds like she actually really likes me!
ask her out
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on March 04, 2019, 03:42:58 PMask her out
I would if I could, but my mom doesn't want me to date till I'm 18, sadly I'm 15 right now. IDK she may change her mind, but I may just have to wait for now to do that. We still talk to each other quite a bit over hangouts, and at the home school group, and sometimes sit, and talk at lunch.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on March 04, 2019, 03:57:33 PMI would if I could, but my mom doesn't want me to date till I'm 18, sadly I'm 15 right now. IDK she may change her mind, but I may just have to wait for now to do that.
Lucky, every time I ask my mom says 35.
Quote from: Bobbythekid21 on March 04, 2019, 03:58:17 PMLucky, every time I ask my mom says 35.
Your mom is just joking with you, right?
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on March 04, 2019, 04:01:46 PMYour mom is just joking with you, right?
Probably but IDK, she's never told me otherwise.
My parents didn't say a word until they realized that %90 of my friends are girls and then they started saying "don't date in high school," and I was like, "good thing they're my friends."
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on March 04, 2019, 04:57:01 PMMy parents didn't say a word until they realized that %90 of my friends are girls and then they started saying "don't date in high school," and I was like, "good thing they're my friends."
oof
Friendship is valuable nothing to oof at.
@Splatoon Inkling and ya'll high schoolers
Dating in high school is usually a dead end but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Your parents probably just want to protect you from getting hurt (and/or sex, but that's beside the point) but I vote just ask her out. You're in a very safe enviorment for making mistakes right now, take advantage of that and learn a thing or two about yourself, relationship, and handling rejection. Maybe you'll even hit the jackpot and make the highschool sweetheart a thing.
Quote from: FireArrow on March 06, 2019, 02:20:29 AMFriendship is valuable nothing to oof at.
@Splatoon Inkling and ya'll high schoolers
Dating in high school is usually a dead end but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Your parents probably just want to protect you from getting hurt (and/or sex, but that's beside the point) but I vote just ask her out. You're in a very safe enviorment for making mistakes right now, take advantage of that and learn a thing or two about yourself, relationship, and handling rejection. Maybe you'll even hit the jackpot and make the highschool sweetheart a thing.
Yeah, that's kind of how I feel about it but my parents don't quite agree so I don't push it. They're like you shouldn't "experiment" with people. I'm like what do you call your first born then? (But I don't actually say that because I'm not an insufferable little brat)
Quote from: FireArrow on March 06, 2019, 02:20:29 AMFriendship is valuable nothing to oof at.
@Splatoon Inkling and ya'll high schoolers
Dating in high school is usually a dead end but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. Your parents probably just want to protect you from getting hurt (and/or sex, but that's beside the point) but I vote just ask her out. You're in a very safe enviorment for making mistakes right now, take advantage of that and learn a thing or two about yourself, relationship, and handling rejection. Maybe you'll even hit the jackpot and make the highschool sweetheart a thing.
Well I'm not supposed to date till I'm 18, but I actually did at one point have a crush on this one girl from my church, that I also got to see at my home school group every week. (This was actually last school year.) We both really liked each other for a while, then I started just getting really needy, and insecure, (which I had been throughout, but it showed a lot less before) and then she kind of rejected me because of that. Believe me I learned A LOT from all that, and also I have watched a lot of YouTube videos on how to get a girl to like you, and be more mature, and stuff like that. Plus some other things in my life, and well I have matured quite a bit since that rough experience. You know, we were actually pretty close to becoming bf, and gf, but I realize now that that relationship may not have worked well in the end. The girl I like now just seems to be someone who would be better for me, we have the same beliefs religious wise, (the girl I used to have a crush on, she came to my church, but I don't believe she was an actual Christian) She's more independant, she's a very kind, smart, humorous, and sweet person. This has less to do with that, but one thing that I found kind of interesting is that since I've changed, and matured a lot, it seems like a lot more girls like me, and want to be around me. Ok so interesting story, but on the first day of this school year at my home school group with the class I'm in now. (I actually was trying to get them to like me on purpose, and it worked extraordinarily well) but, anyway they really seemed to all want to be around me, they kept all would keep looking over at me at lunch time, and there are two other boys in my class, and the one said, wow [name], why are those girls so into you? Then the other boy said I'm gonna go ask [name if she likes you] he did, and he said that she said that she liked me. Like seriously they kept calling me almost every week several times in the week, and so on. (Yah I can ramble quite a bit) TBH there is this one other girl in my class that I kind of like, but not as much as the one I just gave the card to, and it seems like she really likes me too, she would ask to borrow my stuff occasionally, and would tap me on the shoulders, and personally ask me things. Anyways I hope to get into a relationship with that girl at some point. @Firearrow, what did you mean when you said this.
QuoteMaybe you'll even hit the jackpot and make the highschool sweetheart a thing.
TL;DR I know it's long, but I have a lot to say.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on March 06, 2019, 07:05:43 AMBut one thing that I found kind of interesting is that since I've changed, and matured a lot, it seems like a lot more girls like me, and want to be around me.
I've definitely noticed the same thing with myself and I've also noticed that people who haven't gone through something like that are (frankly) ignored by the female population their own age.
There is so much in that
Quote from: SlowPokemon on March 06, 2019, 09:43:16 AMThere is so much in that
What exactly do you mean by that?
Ok, so that friend I of hers I was telling about the card I gave to her, I guess she didn't tell any of her friends about it, but she did seem to like it. Well I asked her if she heard anything about it, and apparently not ig, but she did say that she may just want to keep it a secret. I also don't know if her mom knows that I have a crush on her, I think she thinks that I like someone else. IDK, unless she showed it to her mom, I really don't know. I think it's funny how for a while after I quite really liking that girl from my church so much previously, that my mom actually thought that I was just crazy about her! ROTFL! Anyways I don't think my mom has a problem with me liking this girl, although I don't think she knows specifically who I like cause I was very vague about it when I told her, and I don't think her mom would have a problem with me liking her daughter as she is the teacher of the class i'm in, and not to brag, but she has called me the best student in the class multiple times, mainly because of the attitude I have towards my work, and that I bring all of it to class.
I mostly mean to still date with the intention of having things work out. Don't go into it expecting it not to work highschool or otherwise.
It feels good to have a bunch of people admire you, but don't let that determine how you'll do in a relationship. Being in a relationship involves a departure of the self. It's easy to force your partner into doing what you want and to claim them as your own, but you need to let go of your pride. While they will likely do and want similar things that you do, try to be aware of what they want. You especially need to give them privacy and time to themselves, which can be difficult to do if they aren't verbally clear about it. I hope you're able to have a good relationship and are able to learn more about yourself, dating can be a eye-opening thing sometimes.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on March 06, 2019, 03:24:55 PMIt feels good to have a bunch of people admire you, but don't let that determine how you'll do in a relationship. Being in a relationship involves a departure of the self. It's easy to force your partner into doing what you want and to claim them as your own, but you need to let go of your pride. While they will likely do and want similar things that you do, try to be aware of what they want. You especially need to give them privacy and time to themselves, which can be difficult to do if they aren't verbally clear about it. I hope you're able to have a good relationship and are able to learn more about yourself, dating can be a eye-opening thing sometimes.
Couldn't agree more.
girls have cooties
yeah stay away ew
Quote from: mikey on March 06, 2019, 04:47:15 PMgirls have cooties
Would you rather be with a guy?
Quote from: Bobbythekid21 on March 06, 2019, 05:15:33 PMWould you rather be with a guy?
guys are gross
at least they don't have cooties
Thats just weird. I would rather be with a girl any day.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on March 06, 2019, 05:40:24 PMThats just weird. I would rather be with a girl any day.
I agree 100%
I like guys and girls
At least there's girls out there who don't think dating guys is weird ;]
Quote from: FireArrow on March 07, 2019, 12:52:54 PMAt least there's girls out there who don't think dating guys is weird ;]
unfathomable, but welcome nonetheless
Quote from: mikey on March 07, 2019, 07:42:56 PMunfathomable, but welcome nonetheless
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/264591162315112448/553426109333766178/ebyNJjC.png
Yah, but if a girl likes a guy enough she probably isn't going to think of dating, and stuff as that gross anymore.
Sorry but the double post ahead of time, but since this is the relationship forum I want to ask all of you, are any of you in a relationship?
I've been going steady with carbs for a few years now
I am currently in a relationship (it's my first relationship).
I hope to get into a relationship with the girl I like soon.
If not, I have plenty of other choices. IK of at least one other in particular.
get into relationships with all of them
platonic relationships <3 <3 <3
Isn't that what I already do? Haha, hmm no JK.
So my girlfriend saw this really cute picture of a baby fox and she told me that she wants one. I wasn't sure if foxes would make good pets, so I suggested we research it. I at first looked to see how much one would cost (she later found out around $400), but one question that I saw was if it was legal or not. So I looked into that and found out that it was legal in our state, she was still determined to get a fox. She started to do some research, but got distracted by cute pictures (she's so cute lol). Since we found out how much it cost and that it was legal in our state, we then decided to look how it is to own one. I found that it's quite different from owning other pets and that they can't really be trained, or are difficult to train (she started to change her mind once we found out that they're difficult to be litter trained). It also said that if the fox bites someone, and that person reports it, the fox will be taken to be euthanized. Based on these findings, I concluded that we'd probably have to live in the middle of nowhere to own a fox, that way it won't cause too much trouble. Regardless, she still wants a fox, and I think it'd be cool to have one as well. I told her that if we get a fox I'm naming it Vulpix, because that's my favorite pokemon lol.
Exotic pets aren't domesticated the same way cats/dogs/etc. are. This generally means that they're a lot of work to take care of, make sure you look up what kind of time and financial commitment owning a fox entails before getting one. People that get these kimd of pets normally do it as a hobby.
Yeah, I don't think we'll actually get a fox. And if we do, I'm going to make sure we research a lot about it.
On the off chance you don't know, I'm just warning you that your girlfriend is a furry
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 27, 2019, 01:36:30 PMOn the off chance you don't know, I'm just warning you that your girlfriend is a furry
lol
Yeah, getting a fox is not a good idea for the average person, ESPECIALLY if you only want to get one because it's cute.
honestly hard recommend just getting a pet rabbit
relatively low maintenance, equally cute, surprisingly affordable
rabbits are the pets of the future
they shed like crazy though hope you aren't allergic
Quote from: mikey on April 27, 2019, 03:42:47 PMthey shed like crazy though hope you aren't allergic
Knowing her, she probably is allergic.
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 27, 2019, 01:36:30 PMOn the off chance you don't know, I'm just warning you that your girlfriend is a furry
The picture she sent me had the baby fox sticking its tongue out, and I asked why his tongue is out. She replied that he's hungry, then said that if she was a fox, she'd stick her tongue out when she's hungry. I think she also doesn't know that she's a furry lol
;D that other girl I was mentioning about legit said she wanted to take me out. She asked my mom if she could and my mom just said "uhhhhhhhhhh...." lol. So later she told my mom that we were just friends. I asked her for her email and she gave it to me. She keeps telling me I'm her favorite, and that I'm not cheesy like the other boys. And I do like her. lol. She really made my day. We shall see what happens.
wait email?
Quote from: FireArrow on April 29, 2019, 02:59:17 PMwait email?
She should've asked for his address so she could send letters to him all poetic like. (that'd honestly be fun to do for a few days)
It just might work out. That other girl ended up not liking me so much I think she has a crush on this other boy on my class. This girl and me have a lot more similarities as well. Ya never know, may work out may not, as in a few years I'd be heading off to college so if this does eventually turn into a relationship I don't know how that would work.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on April 29, 2019, 03:03:21 PMShe should've asked for his address so she could send letters to him all poetic like. (that'd honestly be fun to do for a few days)
Unlike emails written letters are actually really romantic and just fun and cute for confessions/relationships.
But yeah dude, even if you don't have a phone can't you use like discord/skype/any instant messaging computer app?
nothing wrong with having a galpal
sometimes guys need a break from guys imo cause lets face it they can be exhausting to hang around sometimes
Quote from: mikey on April 29, 2019, 04:51:17 PMnothing wrong with having a galpal
sometimes guys need a break from guys imo cause lets face it they can be exhausting to hang around sometimes
lol. Yes. Very true. I'm hoping it will turn into a relationship. She definitely likes me a lot more than the last one. That lasted for a pretty short time. It actually seemed like she liked me less after I gave her the card and I feel like I wasn't interesting enough to her. This seems a bit more promising. A friend said she kind of has a boy friend who she keeps breaking up with and then getting back together, in my opinion sounds easy to deal with. She definitely likes me though. She had a crush on this one kid in her class for a while but he didn't like her. She has had a crush on me for quite a while now. Anything is possible though. I know how to work around it and stuff. lol, I've studied up. UPDATE: Just found out she doesn't even date that guy anymore plus it sounds like they are broken up.
Alright, good luck
Quote from: mikey on April 29, 2019, 04:51:17 PMnothing wrong with having a galpal
sometimes guys need a break from guys imo cause lets face it they can be exhausting to hang around sometimes
Conversely, most of my friends are girls so when I hang out with a guy friend it's like pleasingly low maintenance
Quote from: SlowPokemon on April 30, 2019, 02:01:44 PMConversely, most of my friends are girls so when I hang out with a guy friend it's like pleasingly low maintenance
Same, though when I hang out with guys, it's usually to share ideas. I generally treat everyone in a general way, but if I consider them a friend, I prefer a more emotional relationship.
Do you guys think this was a good first text? Hey [her name], [your name] here... save this number... it's the most important one you're going to get. :)
I sent it this morning, I'd on know I'd she saw it or not. It was over email. Maybe I'm over thinking this. IDK. She didn't respond. Then again my Google name is master of the Mario and I didn't add a subject.
Tut, tut, should've gone for the winky face instead.
I don't know if she saw it or not. I sent it this morning.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on April 30, 2019, 07:49:31 PMMaybe I'm over thinking this. IDK. She didn't respond.
Definitely, just take it chill. You want to establish a normality. Instead of trying to flirt, maybe just talk about something that interests you, or ask her things about herself. Get to know her before you start flirting.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 01, 2019, 04:18:55 AMDefinitely, just take it chill. You want to establish a normality. Instead of trying to flirt, maybe just talk about something that interests you, or ask her things about herself. Get to know her before you start flirting.
yah true, but I do have to say something. Today was AWESOME! I did my mock trial and our team won in the end. (It was against my hometown Sioux city, lol.) Anyway there was a thing at pizza ranch afterwards and well that girl wanted me to come so bad. (She was saying that we were just friends at first, then later those kids were teasing her about us being a couple and she said she was gonna kill them) She was joking, she wouldn't literally kill. (some other kids were giving us a tough time about it all) and she was slightly resistant at first then later I think something switched in her mind, almost as if she kind of let go of the "just friends deal" afterwards I talked to her some more and before I left she actually hugged me. I leaned in and told her that I kinda like her, and she quite frankly admitted that she likes me too! Yes, I am getting to know her better as well, I don't know exactly how old she is, she's slightly taller than me actually, but we are strangely just so similar in so many different ways. Kind of interesting, but yes I will try to be careful with what I do as we are still getting to know each other. Friend zone is a choice and I was a nice guy but I have chosen to break the barrier. Not saying it's a bad thing to start out as friends, but if you like someone and that's all you ever do, nothing will ever come of it.
Woohoo, relationships! My girlfriend broke up with me today, saying that she didn't want to pursue a long-distance relationship after high school (which doesn't make sense as to why she wanted to date me in the first place, but we'll go with that). Now, she also used the past week as a "sign" that now was a good time to break up, which is understandable, I haven't been the nicest person to her. However, she exhibits a selfish and stubborn behavior and doesn't know it, and part of the reason we were fighting last week was because I tried talking to her about it. Whenever I brought up something she's done that made me feel neglected or hinted at her selfishness, she'd immediately respond by telling me the things that I've done that made her feel mad, completely ignoring my issues. Now, I didn't want to come across as selfish, so I'd listen to her and do something to try and make her happy, but in doing so, my own problems just got worse. Retrospectively, I could've showed her more love than what I was giving, but I guess at the time I was so tired of being neglected that I wanted her to know how she made me feel. Now, she still wants to be friends, she said that I'm one of her best friends, so it's not a total loss (going on into the future, it'll likely be a blessing), and I desperately wanted to tell her these things to make her aware, but I knew it'd hurt her feelings so I didn't. With that said, so far it kinda seems like she's trying to hold a grudge with me to justify breaking up, meanwhile I've already moved on and am willing to accept my reality. We'll see how things go in the coming weeks.
Sounds like it wasn't healthy it's a good thing you're willing to look towards the future rather than get stuck on this.
The ironic thing is that she liked/wanted to date me and I was like, "uhh, sure"
People are weird. The key to life is finding the weird people that don't hurt you.
Not possible, lol. I think I'll have a better understanding of people once I get into college.
Yep very important. The person I'm thinking of possibly starting a relationship with seems to be much better of a person than the first few I've met. She is so fun, sweet, and caring. She's extraverted like me. lol. We have so much in common. I know she is a much better person than past girls I have liked. She is so my type. It is amazing, I never thought I'd meet someone quite like her.
The jaded pessimist in me says that if someone seems too good to be true, they're probably too good to be true. Just... be on your toes.
Lol, this is so me^
inb4 "who hurt you bds"
Who hurt you bds?
WELL IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WAS 12...
...it's a long story.
Ok, well. I would still have to disagree with you somewhat. She actually does seem to be someone who is ok, I do look at character as well. I'm saying that I like her more than previous girls I have liked. It's not like I can even date her yet, right now it's best just to be a good friend for right now.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on May 07, 2019, 10:46:41 AMit's best just to be a good friend
Friend zone is a wonderful thing, don't aim for more than what's needed.
Quote from: cashwarrior1 on May 07, 2019, 11:14:23 AMFriend zone is a wonderful thing, don't aim for more than what's needed.
I'm confused. My mom said it's a good thing to start out as friends. Which well that's obvious it's a good start. I thought it was a terrible place to be though.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on May 07, 2019, 10:46:41 AMOk, well. I would still have to disagree with you somewhat. She actually does seem to be someone who is ok, I do look at character as well. I'm saying that I like her more than previous girls I have liked. It's not like I can even date her yet, right now it's best just to be a good friend for right now.
I'm telling you, I had a close friend who I thought was a kind, caring, non-judgemental person, and they turned out to be a selfish, lying, insincere, manipulative shitbag! There are people out there who put on facades all the time so that they can get what they want from people, and it's not always easy to tell the genuine people from the disingenuous. I'm not saying she's not a good person, I'm just cautioning you to not miss the red flags because you're head over heels in love.
Quote from: Splatoon Inkling on May 07, 2019, 12:14:46 PMI'm confused. My mom said it's a good thing to start out as friends. Which well that's obvious it's a good start. I thought it was a terrible place to be though.
Personally, I think it's rare that a solid relationship could exist without first being good friends, which is why it's confusing to people when someone says they don't want to date you
because you're friends. Chances are, if someone says that, they just don't want to tell you they're not attracted/are secretly repulsed by you.
Quote from: BlackDragonSlayer on May 07, 2019, 10:25:49 AMWELL IT ALL STARTED WHEN I WAS 12...
...it's a long story.
NOW THIS IS A STORY ALL ABOUT HOW
MY HEART GOT TRICKED AND RIPPED RIGHT OUT
Yah I guess I see that. My mom said that her and dad have a good marriage because they were good friends in the first place. But my mom does say that she likes her and actually seems to be caring as she has a friend in a wheelchair that she helps out and other things.
(sorry to move the topic back to me)
Before dating my ex, we were friends but we never hung out, and as a result of dating, we're now best friends. I think it's near impossible to predict/prepare for what will happen in a relationship, which is part of the fun! So I'd say dive right into it and keep an open mind so that you can get the experience you need to learn about what you want in a relationship.
Quote from: mikey on May 07, 2019, 03:29:31 PMNOW THIS IS A STORY ALL ABOUT HOW
MY HEART GOT TRICKED AND RIPPED RIGHT OUT
THE STORY'S QUITE LONG
SO YOU SIT TIGHT
I'LL TELL YOU HOW I BECAME MISERABLE WITH DESPAIR.
20 minutes of rant later.....
A little update on my breakup situation...
So right after we broke up, I planned on not letting it get me down/prevent me from doing the things I enjoy, so I presented myself as happy and okay with the situation. I was afraid that if I presented myself that way, my friend would think that I hated dating her and that I'm happy to be single again, I don't know if she even took notice. But regardless, it worked and helped me stay positive. However, there was one major problem: I had nobody to speak my mind with. I considered talking to her about what's on my mind, but I thought that she'd stop being friends with me if I bothered her too much. I realized that I never really talk with any of my other friends, so I decided to text all of them, asking about either their life or something they were doing, to try and see which person would be the most okay with me speaking my mind. Now, this included texting my ex, and I desperately hoped she wouldn't just start stonewalling me.
Since she was feeling sick, I asked her if she was feeling any better, she said no, and exclaimed that it's been a long week. Knowing her, I immediately got the hint that she was feeling bad about our break up, but I didn't say anything because I honestly wanted her to admit it herself. She had asked me how I was feeling (maybe it was because when we broke up I told her I was feeling nauseous, and maybe it was because she was wondering if I felt hurt by the break up as well, don't know) and then told me that if I need anything to talk to her. Later, I asked her about a youth symphony performance I was supposed to go to but couldn't, just to see how it went. She mentioned that she didn't feel good, so it was hard to enjoy, and I advised her to take some medicine. I then asked her what she did that day (just making small talk :P) and she said that she was going to watch a sad movie. I was kinda confused, so I asked her if anything was wrong, and she said "I'm just sad." I asked her if she wanted to talk about it, but she wouldn't say anything more, so I decided to empathize with her and say that I'm sad as well. She responded with "being sad sucks," and I took that as another hint that she felt bad about the breakup.
I took a leap and asked her if she still thinks about me, and she said "yeah," and I let her know that I was constantly thinking about her. And then she said that she was sorry we didn't work out (she admitted it, yay!) and we then had a discussion to try and get a better understanding. Really, she's determined that a long distance relationship would 100% fail, but also that she couldn't handle two years away from me. Honestly, I was simultaneously rolling my eyes and anxious to get back together, but I kept my cool. I honestly feel that we are both still very much in love, but I agree with her that we could spend some time just being friends. Maybe after college, if we still want it, we'll try again.
So this is interesting.... I asked her out in a way.... so she really wants me to come to this dance with her some time in the summer and I later asked her about it and she said she will keep me posted. She also came emailing telling me that she misses hanging with me and said maybe we could sometime this summer. I don't know If that's what you call asking someone out exactly but. I don't know what my mom is going to say.... then again on Friday the class I was previously in since it's summer break had a game night just for fun and the topic kinda got brought up, and the one girl was telling me the "Date night dance" isn't really a date.
I wouldn't say it was asking someone out, but hey, it might be a yes if you do it clearly.
Ok, I'm doing just that. Is this a good way to do this? The message I'm thinking of sending. "Hey, random here, but I was thinking maybe we could hang sometime soon here. When are you free?"
(Gulp) it's sent. Wish me luck.
Edit: She wants too!