Submission Information:
Series: Final Fantasy
Game: Final Fantasy VII
Console: PlayStation
Title: One-Winged Angel
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arrangers: Latios212 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=4344) & Libera (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=5291)
Replacement Information:
Links to Existing Sheet: MUS (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/mus/707) | MIDI (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/mid/707) | PDF (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/pdf/707)
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)
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Huzzah.
I intend on going through it again and checking everything again, but here it is finally in a presentable state.
Yo very nice, fellas! This is a really cool song, and crazy long to boot. Oof.
Here are my suggestions:
- Wherever there are 16th triplet runs, I'd love to suggest breaking the inside beam between the triplet groups. It just makes it easier to read, rather than having triplet beamed in pairs that look like sextuplets.
- I wouldn't say it's necessary by any means, but consider courtesy accidentals when changing chords, particularly between measures and at the end of systems (measures 31-32 for example). Again, with all the modulation though, this may be excessive and unnecessary. I do think that measure 60 could benefit well from it though.
- Those quarter-triplet rhythms in the right hand between measures 71-79 sound more like the dotted equivalent to me. That is: dotted eighth, 16th-tied-to-eighth, eighth.
- Please courtesy accidental in RH at measure 82 and corresponding places.
- In measures 107-110, would there be a way to include those Ds and C#s in the RH, even if put an octave higher to make it work? It just seems a shame to lose this entire layer of harmony, especially since is one of the most harmonically interesting elements in this entire section. This could also be implemented into the next part with the choral descant.
- Measure 88 RH the last eighth note of the measure is an F natural in playback but that isn't visually represented.
- The first quarter note of measure 90 RH has a lower G harmony with the D, creating an open 5th so far as I think I hear. Feel free to disagree but I do believe there is harmony here that would be great to include. It almost sounds like the C# after also has similarly an F# harmony (creating the same 5th interval) but don't quote me on that one; I'm not super great at thick dissonance.
Great job on such a daunting arrangement!
Thanks for the feedback and compliments! :P
- Ah, good point for the 16th triplets! I've updated m. 7-8 (left 26-27 as is).
- Had another look for courtesy accidentals. Regarding the places you mentioned (32 and 60), I personally tend to be quite averse to putting courtesy accidentals at the beginning of a system because the key signature is right there as a reminder - it seems redundant as well as potentially confusing. In other sections like m. 21-24 where the accidentals are all over the place I avoid messing with them, especially given that for this song the key signature tends to be quite empty and clean with only one sharp/flat and it's easy to do a mental reset when needed. However I did fix a spelling error in m. 61.
- Yep, fixed those rhythms in 71-79.
- Oh yeah, 82 and 86 are perfect places for a courtesy natural. Nice catch~
- In m. 107+ do you mean this layer? If so I think it'd be better in the left hand than the right:
Spoiler
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/401094846107877377/534922545808277504/unknown.png
- m. 88 - fixed!
- m. 90 oh yeah the melody could definitely use some more harmony here, thanks for noticing! We were honestly not terribly confident about this part and I think we could do with filling in the whole Em7 chord. Not sure about the F# on beat 2 though, I think the harmony stays the same.
Files updated with all of the above (plus a couple other visual tweaks)!
I don't normally say this, but maybe a ff for the intro? At least center the f you have there a bit.
m36 rh - b3.5 should be D-E-G# (discussed)
m37 and similar - I will not budge on this one - RH should be written like this
Spoiler
(https://files.catbox.moe/3bulea.jpg)
The choir does
not go down to the A octave harmony. I've checked this song multiple times, as well as other versions of the song Uematsu has arranged himself, and that happens in none of them, not even in the concert I saw live, featuring him in the choir. Writing it the way you have distracts from the motion of the original by adding in a new, clashing motion that makes it uncomfortable to listen to for someone who has heard this song so many times.
m54 and similar -I don't really like the inversion you chose. Because it doesn't have the F on top, the harmony's jump of a minor third sounds weird when my ear expects a half step. Maybe fiddle with it so that ends up on top
Otherwise, excellent job. Fix/address this and I approve
I've updated the files.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 16, 2019, 05:44:22 PMI don't normally say this, but maybe a ff for the intro? At least center the f you have there a bit.
I feel like f fits better with the rest of the piece, so I kept it as that. I did try to place it a bit more conventionally though.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 16, 2019, 05:44:22 PMm36 rh - b3.5 should be D-E-G# (discussed)
m37 and similar - I will not budge on this one - RH should be written like this Spoiler
(https://files.catbox.moe/3bulea.jpg)
These have been changed.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 16, 2019, 05:44:22 PMm54 and similar -I don't really like the inversion you chose. Because it doesn't have the F on top, the harmony's jump of a minor third sounds weird when my ear expects a half step. Maybe fiddle with it so that ends up on top
I've kept this as it is because this is how I hear the piece. Latios if you want to mess around with it though feel free.
I'm okay with how that's written for now. There's not much you can do aside from omit the top layer or move the F's up an octave. I think you can still emphasize the F's
cool
Looks good overall; just a few things on my part:
- To avoid losing the effect of the pounding chords during measures 7–8 and elsewhere, consider adding chord notes to the upper octave basses. (I know Libera is going to hate this suggestion, but at least I'll have someone on my side:
Spoiler
(https://i.imgur.com/j6pRYlr.jpg)
- I think the notes in the left hand as well as the right hand second layer in measures 3 and 4 should be slurred by beats. (And what do we have here?
Spoiler
(https://i.imgur.com/jxvntXM.jpg)
- I second the notion that the second chord of the third beat in measure 36 (and others) should be D-E-G#.
- I'm pretty sure the right hand has Bb instead of Ab in measure 100.
- Just a few chromatic spellings from the official arrangement:
- Measure 21: the G# is instead spelled Ab.
- Measure 23: the A# is instead spelled Bb.
- Measure 37 (and everywhere else where this theme comes up): the C# is spelled Bb in both hands. This one I recommend more strongly, since this is in fact, a harmonic progression (which you might recognize from the Imperial March).
- Measures 69 and 75, the Bb is instead spelled A#.
- Measures 71, 77, and 78, the Db is instead spelled C#.
...isn't copying stuff from the "official arrangement" technically plagiarism? Maybe for some note choices it isn't, but articulation choices pulled from it would definitely count.
Quote from: Dudeman on January 16, 2019, 09:26:36 PM...isn't copying stuff from the "official arrangement" technically plagiarism? Maybe for some note choices it isn't, but articulation choices pulled from it would definitely count.
For the record, I thought of the suggestions first (except the chromatic respellings), then I remembered I owned the Piano Collections version and took it out to compare what Shiro Hamaguchi had done. In any case, I certainly don't think this is a case of plagiarism; even with the above modifications, this sheet sounds nothing like Shiro Hamaguchi's version.
There definitely exists a line between using something as a reference and plagiarizing it, which definitely shouldn't be crossed. However, I find it simply ridiculous to suggest that these specific modifications
do, in fact, cross that boundary.
Aside from creative and legal aspects of whether or not we should follow Hamaguchi's direction in articulation use I feel that this is an exemplary arrangement even if it doesn't mirror other versions of itself by more adequate arrangers.
This arrangement is fine. Latios and Liberia did an excellent job resurrecting this piece from the dead.
It gets a go from me, dog.
This submission has been accepted by Brassman388 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=521).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot