Submission Information:
Series: Castlevania
Game: Castlevania: Circle of the Moon
Console: Game Boy Advance
Title: Awake
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Atcero (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=4216)
Replacement Information:
Links to Existing Sheet: MUS (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/mus/225) | MIDI (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/mid/225) | PDF (http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/download/pdf/225)
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)
[attachment deleted by admin]
It be finally completed, and after this one more to go for replacement in CotM
Couple notes: I did add octaves to places where there weren't any for a lot of them because the song sounds very empty without them.
The glissando is supposed to just go to what the player feels, no real ending note, but not sure how to notate that one.
I believe the staccatos are incorrect for the second layer notes however my finale breaks every time for those badbois so I'm leaving those till the very end to fix if they are supposed to go above the notehead.
Got it updated with some things I missed like courtesy accidentals and added another voice in there I forgot about until I woke up with the song in my head
Quote from: Atcero on April 12, 2023, 06:45:58 PMCouple notes: I did add octaves to places where there weren't any for a lot of them because the song sounds very empty without them.
I'm not usually a fan of this but I think it's fine here
Quote from: Atcero on April 12, 2023, 06:45:58 PMThe glissando is supposed to just go to what the player feels, no real ending note, but not sure how to notate that one.
This is how I've done and seen them in the past so it should be good
Quote from: Atcero on April 12, 2023, 06:45:58 PMI believe the staccatos are incorrect for the second layer notes however my finale breaks every time for those badbois so I'm leaving those till the very end to fix if they are supposed to go above the notehead.
Let's sort those at the end then
- m1: I think you can add in more harmony to the first half of this measure, similarly to how you did in the next 3 measures. There's enough available to add stuff to both hands, if you wish
I hear an A in the flute part at beat 3.25 - m2: I'm not sure if it's worth doubling the F-G-A line in the RH, since I can only hear it in one instrument. You could add the C-D-E run instead?
In the LH, it might be worth rewriting the grace note part, it is written correctly but I feel like using one grace note-16th-16th conveys the feeling of the og better than grace-grace-8th. Up to you though, might just be me - m3 & 4: However you want to write the LH here is fine, but I think it should be consistent: Either octaves or bass+guitar part, not both. The bass also plays some extra notes on beats 1.5 and 2.25, I think adding those would be good
If you choose bass+guitar part (which I recommend) you should change the harmony you use in m3; C-C-A would work better than doubling the low guitar.
The harmonies are a bit tricky in m4, they aren't as easily playable, but I would recommend changing the F at beat 1 (RH) to a low C. - m5-8: I don't hear the low As/Abs in the LH, and m8 b1 should be E
- m8: I hear low Es instead of As as the notes before the gliss, but I'm thinking E-A-Egliss would be the best option that is playable
- m9-18: If this track is foobarable, I recommend splitting the channels and re-listening for the harmony: Most of what I'm hearing would work well in an arrangement without adding too much extra difficulty (lmk if you want specific notes/suggestions).
- m12 beat 2.5: I hear an A in the RH
- m15: The Ebs in the LH should be D#s (B7 chord)
- For m16, I hear the harp? part shifted by one beat. I would recommend dropping the consecutive 16th dyads and combining the layers, like so:
m16
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/844835144242298910/1099345077484146728/image.png?width=560&height=181
- m20: I recommend dropping the lower layer note at beat 2.25: I think it actually starts on beat 2.5, but since we already have a D in the upper layer it's fine leaving it out for playability. The existing A in the layer can be extended
- m21: Similar comment here, except I hear D instead of B at beat 1. The last 2 notes in this layer are F-E instead of E-B
- m22 & 23: In m22 the F at beat 3 should be tied into beat 4, if not written with the E in a lower layer. I would move the LH in both measures down an octave to follow the original. You can fill in m23 a little more if you want: (In the RH) I hear the G move to E at beat 2, and there's a C# played by the distorted guitar at beat 3 that would work harmonically quite nicely too
- m24: same comment as earlier concerning beat 2.25, the A at beat 1 should be a C though
I hear Fs in the LH instead of Ds - m25: I hear a G at beat 1 that you could add to/replace the lower layer
- m26-27: I don't hear the off-beat RH notes tied, they sound like regular 16ths to me
- m26+: Again I would follow the downward motion of the original bass and move the LH notes down an octave where due
- m29: If the octaves in the LH were removed because they clashed with the RH, that shouldnt be the case anymore :)
- m30 & 34: I hear beat 2.25 as E instead of D (Interestingly not in the other occurences)
- m30+: As nice as it would be, I don't think it's feasible to include the high A ostinato in the RH. If you want you could move it down an octave but I think it would be best to leave it out entirely and focus on the main melody. You can then add in some more harmony elements.
I updated all of it minus the m9-18 and the ostinato As. I sent a message in Discord about the m9-18 for if I had the correct harmony.
Thanks so much!
Sorry for the wait on this again
Quote from: XiaoMigros on April 22, 2023, 10:05:26 AM- m1: I think you can add in more harmony to the first half of this measure, similarly to how you did in the next 3 measures. There's enough available to add stuff to both hands, if you wish
I hear an A in the flute part at beat 3.25 - m2: In the LH, it might be worth rewriting the grace note part, it is written correctly but I feel like using one grace note-16th-16th conveys the feeling of the og better than grace-grace-8th. Up to you though, might just be me
I'm assuming you forgot about these points, but if you don't agree with anything here let me know
- m1 & 3: Beat 3.5 doesn't sound staccato, in either hand
- With m3-4, I think it would be great if you could keep the bass at the bottom, and avoid having notes play in more than one octave. Here's an example I came up with:
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/844835144242298910/1130769168594124841/image.png?width=722&height=243 - Beat 3 in the LH of m4 sounds the same length as the RH
- If you want, you could make the barline between m4 and m5 a double barline, so the tempo change is less likely to be missed
- The Abs in m8 should be G#s, they're part of an E major chord
- m12: Beat 2.5 in the RH doesn't sound staccato, and beat 3 sounds like a half note
- m17-18: For the RH, I'd recommend keeping the harmony and melody in separate layers. For the LH, I'd recommend removing the octaves in m17, so the new harmony part doesn't sound as muddy. I'm also hearing some notes a little differently, something like this:
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/844835144242298910/1130777180541026304/image.png?width=407&height=232 - m21: Beat 2.75 in the RH should be an F
- m23: Do you want to move the C# at beat 3 into the lower layer or nah
- m24: I'm hearing C in the lower layer at beat 1, not A
- m25: I think it's best to stick to one note in the lower layer at a time, like you do in other similar measures. If you want to keep the G, I think it should become G#
- m27: I think the C# at beat 3.75 should be a Bn
- m30+: I understand keeping the high As is important to you, and that's okay! That said, I think there's too much going on in the lower layer for this to be deemed playable at the moment. Maybe you can try some stuff out on a piano and see what works for you?
I believe I got everything updated, thank ya!
I did forget to say I want to keep m1 kinda more bare as a build up for the next measures, and I guess I would like to keep the grace notes as grace-grace-8th.
For the ostinatos, it does seem possible if you have slightly bigger hands than mine, but performance note would probably be the best fit in this situation.
Quote from: Atcero on August 03, 2023, 07:26:41 PMI did forget to say I want to keep m1 kinda more bare as a build up for the next measures
I understand leaving out the extra harmony here, but the note I'm referring to is part of a melodic figure so I'd strongly advise adding it.
Quote from: XiaoMigros on July 18, 2023, 01:26:10 AM- m1 & 3: Beat 3.5 doesn't sound staccato, in either hand
I'm still hearing this
- For m3, do you want to move the last two LH notes down an octave, to match the rest of the bass line? I also find it slightly easier to play
- m17: The E in the upper RH layer should be removed (but it should remain in the lower layer)
- m23: Instead of a change of dynamics, you could move the Bb-A-G figure into the lower layer, and turn the E in the higher layer into a whole note. Like this, it becomes clear that the figure is not part of the main melody, and will naturally be played more quietly. You can change the duration of the C# on beat 3 to match the Bb.
Quote from: Atcero on August 03, 2023, 07:26:41 PMFor the ostinatos, it does seem possible if you have slightly bigger hands than mine, but performance note would probably be the best fit in this situation.
The issue isn't just hand size, it's that this passage is at best uncomfortable and at worst not possible to play due to fingering and speed. Here's a slightly reduced version I made, trying to keep the best of both worlds:
Spoiler
https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/844835144242298910/1149651024420814902/image.png?width=863&height=600
If it can be helped, using a performance note wouldn't be the best idea, since I feel this can be resolved through arranging instead.
- m31 & 35: For beat 4 in the LH, I'd recommend moving the E up an octave so the sound is less muddy.
For beat 4 in the RH, I hear a C-A-B-C 16th figure in m31, and C-D-B-C in m35. - m33: For beat 3.5-end in the RH, I hear C#-G be played in the same rhythm as the bass
- m37: Same as for m33, but this time A-B
Thank you! Got that all updated minus
Quotem1 & 3: Beat 3.5 doesn't sound staccato, in either hand
Im still hearing the staccato in the RH at full speed tbh
QuoteFor beat 4 in the RH, I hear a C-A-B-C 16th figure in m31, and C-D-B-C in m35.
I hear that as well now but I only kept the last two notes otherwise the ostinato wouldn't be able to be played
Quotem33: For beat 3.5-end in the RH, I hear C#-G be played in the same rhythm as the bass
m37: Same as for m33, but this time A-B
For these two it did not sound right at all, so I've opted to keep them out and would rather have the two sixteenth notes or nothing at all.
Quote from: Atcero on September 09, 2023, 09:53:07 AMI hear that as well now but I only kept the last two notes otherwise the ostinato wouldn't be able to be played
That makes sense, looks great!
- m2: The slur on the grace notes should end on the main note rather than the last grace note
- Measure/system spacing: If you wanted to, I think you could fit 3 and 4 measures per system on most systems, rather than 2 or 3, but either way works. What I would recommend though is to distribute the systems more evenly: The last page has 3 currently, and the second page has 5, for example
Got that all updated I believe, thank you!
Looks great! I have nothing to add, this sheet has my approval :)
• You have full finale right? The note spacing is a bit off in places, most apparent @ m12 RH with the 16th notes. Learned this from Xiao, but if you press ctrl+a then ctrl+4 it fixes all the spacing automatically.
• The starting mp dynamic could be a little lower so it is centered between staffs
• fwiw exact tempo at m5 is q=139
• Tempo marks do appear a little odd, though I know this sheet predates formatting guidelines. If possible, you could use the new Finale template to fix the font type and size.
• m14 LH 4.5 is D's still
• m19 RH last note hearing D, not B. You could also put parentheses on the En in the LH given it is shared by both parts.
• m21 RH lower layer while it sounds cool, the C on beat 1 is technically a Bn.
• m29 LH the E's sound lower than the E's in m28, you could move them down an octave, as well as the G#'s. Or alternatively, same feedback for m19 about the parentheses applies
• For the record at m33 RH I do not hear the two ending notes in your lower layer. I know this was already covered, but I don't hear the C# and G, I hear E and G making same rhythms as left hand. You could pull them up an octave from what they are shown as in my screenshot:
Spoiler
(https://i.imgur.com/WuGs6Bv.png)
• m37 LH beat 3.5 hearing this E as a D, followed by an E instead of G
• m37 RH Overall (ignore LH in this picture) I'm hearing things a little differently - I did pull the ending two pitches up an octave, but I think it goes nicely back to the beginning from here.
Spoiler
(https://i.imgur.com/8MiJbUm.png)
EDIT 9/19 Hearing this at m1 in the LH, similar to Xiao's earlier point about beat 3.25 (flute part starting on this beat):
Spoiler
(https://i.imgur.com/buXCUBm.png)
All updated minus the formatting template, not sure if 27 will accept that without breaking honestly. Also second playback is broken and thought I had it set up correctly but doesnt seem to be, but if that doesnt matter then it should hopefully be good to go!
Atcero was able to address the repeat issue and now the song repeats correctly on playback. Kricketune used Accept
This submission has been accepted by Kricketune54 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=6528).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot