#1: Super Mario Odyssey - Poolside RestWhat better to do in all this heat than take a breath by the poolside?
Second sheet to come sometime later, since I will be busy/away most of the submission period!
#2: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - World 8
Nice sheet, not a lot to say!
-I'm not sure if there's a general understanding in swung pieces on how to tackle sixteenths or sixteenth triplets that happen on a .5 beat: maybe these would work better as grace notes instead? I think I'd interpret them that way as well when playing.
-m16: The tie on the E in the R.H. on beat 2.5 clashes a bit with the notes, maybe you could shorten it?
-m38: I hear the A in the L.H. on beat 2.5 instead of beat 3.
-m84: Same as m16 with the tie on the A in the R.H. on beat 2.5
-m85: Grace note runs that have more than 1 note should usually be written in 16ths instead of 8ths (make sure to do that too, if you decide on writing the sixteenth notes in the rest of the sheet as grace notes as well)
Quote from: Bloop on August 13, 2023, 06:40:39 AMNice sheet, not a lot to say!
-I'm not sure if there's a general understanding in swung pieces on how to tackle sixteenths or sixteenth triplets that happen on a .5 beat: maybe these would work better as grace notes instead?
I did seriously consider this when I made the arrangement, but I feel like a number of parts where the first 16th lines up with an accompanying 8th end up being much messier then so I thought it was safer to keep it like this. Additionally, it should be pretty clear how to play it for that reason. I don't really feel super strongly about it either way, so I might end up changing it later if I feel it's best.
As for the rest of the changes, I caught another one of those bad ties in m58, and also flipped the slur in m67. Thanks for checking!
Quote from: XiaoMigros on August 13, 2023, 08:35:59 AMI did seriously consider this when I made the arrangement, but I feel like a number of parts where the first 16th lines up with an accompanying 8th end up being much messier then so I thought it was safer to keep it like this. Additionally, it should be pretty clear how to play it for that reason. I don't really feel super strongly about it either way, so I might end up changing it later if I feel it's best.
That's true yeah, lining up the first grace note with that 8th might solve that issue, but it's true that keeping it like this works as well. Maybe the online one I'd consider changing is the one in m17's L.H.
Anyway, I'll
approve!
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/895351643024015360/906174785795522560/BloopActuallyApproves.png
Thanks! I think I'll change m17 since it's not very beautiful atm
My second sheet is up: New Super Mario Bros. Wii - World 8
World 8
-m1: You could add a grace note F# before beat 1 in the R.H. to imitate the pitch bend.
-m3 and on: I think you could move the marimba melody down an octave if you want? It gets pretty close to the L.H., but it doesn't get too much in the way, and it doesn't sound bad either. Up to you though!
-m6 and 12: The F on beat 1.25 should be an F#
-m14: I hear the G on beat 4.5 an octave higher.
I think that's all though, great work ^^ As for the name, I think you posted something in the discord about where the world names on site came from, though idk if someone ever responded. My answer would be: idk probably old video's that had different soundtrack names. The only official naming I could find searching the internet was this official game guide (https://archive.org/details/new-super-mario-bros.-wii-prima-strategy-guide/page/n149/mode/2up), which has different names than the ones we have on site. World 8 would be called "Bowser's World" then. We could also just change the other names on site so they don't have the world names and just say "World x". What do you think?
Quote from: Bloop on August 20, 2023, 01:37:40 PMI think that's all though, great work ^^ As for the name, I think you posted something in the discord about where the world names on site came from, though idk if someone ever responded. My answer would be: idk probably old video's that had different soundtrack names. The only official naming I could find searching the internet was this official game guide (https://archive.org/details/new-super-mario-bros.-wii-prima-strategy-guide/page/n149/mode/2up), which has different names than the ones we have on site. World 8 would be called "Bowser's World" then. We could also just change the other names on site so they don't have the world names and just say "World x". What do you think?
I found the same guide via the same link, and came to a similar conclusion; I chose to leave out the names
because I didn't like them since they aren't stated anywhere in game, and aren't widely used. I think sticking with "World x" would be best.
Quote from: Bloop on August 20, 2023, 01:37:40 PM-m1: You could add a grace note F# before beat 1 in the R.H. to imitate the pitch bend.
I intentionally left this out originally, but actually I quite like it now! I added the C# also
Quote from: Bloop on August 20, 2023, 01:37:40 PM-m3 and on: I think you could move the marimba melody down an octave if you want?
For some reason I thought there were way more intersections... much better in this register
Quote from: Bloop on August 20, 2023, 01:37:40 PM-m6 and 12: The F on beat 1.25 should be an F#
typo
Quote from: Bloop on August 20, 2023, 01:37:40 PM-m14: I hear the G on beat 4.5 an octave higher.
I checked all the Gs in this region and I'm not sure which one you're referring to
I also considered changing the octaves of notes in m7-8 RH but decided against, in part because of clashes with the LH and in part to keep a difference in timbre between the marimba and non-marimba parts.
Thanks for checking, files updated!
Quote from: XiaoMigros on August 21, 2023, 05:19:59 AMI checked all the Gs in this region and I'm not sure which one you're referring to
Huh, I mean the one in m14 beat 4.25 (not beat 4.5 of course) but now I don't hear it an octave higher anymore. I knew organ overtones would trip me up lol
Anyway it all looks good, I'll
approve!
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/895351643024015360/906174785795522560/BloopActuallyApproves.png
Quote from: Bloop on August 21, 2023, 11:35:55 AMI knew organ overtones would trip me up lol
Before arranging I thought all those Gs were an octave higher, it sounds much nicer :( organs will be organs
Real nice work on Poolside Rest! This is by no means a check but a couple of things that stood out to me just playing it back:
- m. 12 should be a G# instead of Ab since it's leading chromatically into the A
- m. 48 - I don't hear the LH A on beat 1.5
Also, I hope this isn't opening up a can of worms, but what's the source on the "Poolside Rest" title? It looks like the full OST (https://www.mariowiki.com/Super_Mario_Odyssey_Original_Soundtrack) has only been released in Japanese. A title of "Taking a Breath by the Poolside" is provided on that page, although "Poolside Rest" also works fine.
I believe 'Poolside Rest' stems from the in-game music player, but I'll check again there before the sheet is accepted. I've seen both titles used
New Super Mario Bros. Wii - World 8
Not a lot to say here, m20 RH 1.0 thoughts on adding a D octave above just for this note? I guess that might take away from the mp, but was just thinking since the D does sound up an octave for at least this first note you could do that (or maybe just move the D up an octave)
I did consider doing that when initially making this arrangement, or including the A like I do at later beats, but left it out for the reason you mentioned and for playability. Thanks for the suggestion!
Alright, well this sheet looks ready to go, so will accept World 8
Awesome, thanks for your time!
Poolside Rest
Thorough check incoming! Very nice work.
- Missing a dynamic
- LH in m. 10 plays F on beat 2.5, not beat 2
- m. 12 should be a G# instead of Ab since it's leading chromatically into the A
- I might suggest nudging systems around just a bit on page 2 to make more room for the really low notes in m. 29 - they're quite close to the staff below
- It might be a bit soft, but I think I hear an E on top of the RH chord in m. 40 beat 3.5
- m. 48 - I don't hear the LH A on beat 2.5
- I see articulations are somewhat sparse throughout the sheet aside from some staccatos and tenutos (which is totally fine) but the Ab in m. 50 could benefit from an accent
- m. 60 - I don't hear the LH G on beat 2.5
- I'm not sure the half note chord in m. 72 needs to be there. The tremolo doesn't end on a strong high C, and removing the lower notes would get rid of the overlapping ties. I don't think it's super important to denote that the chord rings out through to the next measure, but up to you
- For m. 72 I think all the LH notes besides the first one are not octaves (just the lower notes)
- Not sure why, but the accidentals at the end of m.75 are quite squished together against the notes.
- The D on beat 3 of m. 81 RH should have a C# grace note before it
- I don't think I hear the last Bb in the LH of m. 85?
- I think the Ab on beat 2.5 of m. 87 LH would sound better as G-Ab sixteenth notes
Thanks for the feedback! Should all be covered... except
Quote from: Latios212 on October 14, 2023, 04:45:24 PM- m. 60 - I don't hear the LH G on beat 2.5
- I don't think I hear the last Bb in the LH of m. 85?
m60: the note is more delayed than usual swing but I do still hear it
m85: quite faint but I'm pretty sure it's still there
Quote from: Latios212 on October 14, 2023, 04:45:24 PM- I see articulations are somewhat sparse throughout the sheet aside from some staccatos and tenutos
Are there any other places (preferably many) that you'd recommend? I never add rogue accents to my sheets just because I'm not that great at telling where to, even if they'd be benefical..
Nice! Before we wrap up...
The first couple things are still missing:
Quote from: Latios212 on October 14, 2023, 04:45:24 PM- Missing a dynamic
- LH in m. 10 plays F on beat 2.5, not beat 2
Quote from: Latios212 on October 14, 2023, 04:45:24 PM- m. 60 - I don't hear the LH G on beat 2.5
- I don't think I hear the last Bb in the LH of m. 85?
Quote from: XiaoMigros on October 29, 2023, 05:21:45 PMm60: the note is more delayed than usual swing but I do still hear it
m85: quite faint but I'm pretty sure it's still there
I really don't hear either of them at all, slow or fast or lowered by an octave. Mind triple checking? Either way though, they both fit musically so I won't block over it.
Quote from: XiaoMigros on October 29, 2023, 05:21:45 PMAre there any other places (preferably many) that you'd recommend? I never add rogue accents to my sheets just because I'm not that great at telling where to, even if they'd be benefical..
Not really. Though my personal preference is actually to use articulations sparingly so that the ones that are there stand out more. That A is just particularly punchy sounding. I don't have any specific suggestions to add them elsewhere but some other iterations of that phrase have that beat highlighted as well if you want to listen through again and decide for yourself.
Quote from: Latios212 on October 14, 2023, 04:45:24 PM- LH in m. 10 plays F on beat 2.5, not beat 2
- m. 60 - I don't hear the LH G on beat 2.5
- I don't think I hear the last Bb in the LH of m. 85?
I hate to say it, but I am still hearing all of these. Perhaps it's worth getting a second opinion? Acceptable or not, I'd rather have the correct notes than not lol
Other change has been made
Measure 10 is completely unambiguous to me - there's nothing playing on beat 2 at all. And yeah, I'll poke one of the other updaters to take a quick peek at the other items too!
For m10, I'm definitely hearing the F striking on beat 2.5 with the RH notes.
m60 is really quite subtle, but I hear as Xiao has.
I also hear the last Bb in m85
m10 has been changed. Thanks both!
Alrighty, no further comments from me then. Thanks both!
Accepted