Submission Information:
Series: Kirby
Game: Kirby's Return to Dream Land
Console: Wii
Title: Special Reward Music
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Radiak488417 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=5268)
Very sneaky Vegetable Valley remix. Also this song's internal file name is just "Normal" which I find funny for some reason.
Quote from: Radiak488417 on May 31, 2024, 10:59:04 PMVery sneaky Vegetable Valley remix.
Kirby is the king of sneakily reusing material to no end but never making you tired of it
This looks really good! A couple of comments on the arrangement:
- I would suggest removing the D from the second chord in m. 35; it clashes with the Eb in the left hand a lot especially since there's pedal
- Not sure if I'm imagining it, but a D on top of the second chord in m. 36?
- m. 37 first chord - I think I hear Bb instead of C?
A couple of presentation-related things (let me know if you need help with Finale)
- Dynamics in m. 1/9/33) are all a bit displaced a bit far to the right
- 8va (which would also be an 8va, if you want) could be poked left a bit in m. 24 (both the start and end of it)
- m. 17 is a bit cramped on top, could space the systems out a bit more and sacrifice a little space somewhere else to make up for it
Quote from: Latios212 on June 02, 2024, 07:32:49 PM- I would suggest removing the D from the second chord in m. 35; it clashes with the Eb in the left hand a lot especially since there's pedal
- Not sure if I'm imagining it, but a D on top of the second chord in m. 36?
- m. 37 first chord - I think I hear Bb instead of C?
- I mean that clash is there in the original too :P I honestly don't mind how it sounds on piano, plus you can pretty easily just play that note more quietly when performing. I'll consider removing it if the next updater also takes issue with it.
- Don't think I hear this.
- Ah you're right, good catch
although I like it better with the C...
Quote from: Latios212 on June 02, 2024, 07:32:49 PM- Dynamics in m. 1/9/33) are all a bit displaced a bit far to the right
- 8va (which would also be an 8va, if you want) could be poked left a bit in m. 24 (both the start and end of it)
- m. 17 is a bit cramped on top, could space the systems out a bit more and sacrifice a little space somewhere else to make up for it
- Classic NotePad... fixed.
- Not exactly sure what you meant by the parenthesized bit but I've shortened the 8va.
- Yeah I'm not really sure what to do about this, I could put an 8va under the whole LH here but I don't like how that looks later on in the sheet and I'd prefer to keep it consistent. If you have any suggestions I'd appreciate them.
Forgot to mention before but I'd also appreciate if you could replace the pedal markings in m33-40 in with ones that actually work (preferably in the [Ped *] style). Thanks for taking a look!
Quote from: LeviR.star on June 03, 2024, 08:48:02 PMWHAT
LMAO it took me way too long to realize this as well, I think MSF might have pointed it out to me? Either that or I read it in a YouTube comment somewhere.
I don't think I was aware of this...
Quote from: Latios212 on June 02, 2024, 07:32:49 PM8va (which would also be an 8va, if you want)
Quote from: Radiak488417 on June 03, 2024, 08:40:48 PM- Not exactly sure what you meant by the parenthesized bit but I've shortened the 8va.
whoops I meant to say 8vb. It's fine either way though and the position looks good now
Quote from: Latios212 on June 02, 2024, 07:32:49 PM- m. 17 is a bit cramped on top, could space the systems out a bit more and sacrifice a little space somewhere else to make up for it
Quote from: Radiak488417 on June 03, 2024, 08:40:48 PM- Yeah I'm not really sure what to do about this, I could put an 8va under the whole LH here but I don't like how that looks later on in the sheet and I'd prefer to keep it consistent. If you have any suggestions I'd appreciate them.
I think the notes and everything are fine as they are, I'd just make some manual adjustments to the heights of systems on the first page. See how you like the attached file~
Other than that, I don't think I have anything else!
Quote from: Latios212 on June 10, 2024, 07:40:35 PMwhoops I meant to say 8vb. It's fine either way though and the position looks good now
Oh huh, do we normally ever use 8vb? I don't recall seeing it on most sheets on the site and I've never put it in a sheet of mine before.
Quote from: Latios212 on June 10, 2024, 07:40:35 PMI think the notes and everything are fine as they are, I'd just make some manual adjustments to the heights of systems on the first page. See how you like the attached file~
Looks awesome, thanks so much! Not sure if you saw the thing about the pedal marks but if you could grab those too that'd be great.
Quote from: Radiak488417 on June 10, 2024, 07:48:19 PMLooks awesome, thanks so much! Not sure if you saw the thing about the pedal marks but if you could grab those too that'd be great.
Sorry, missed that! I updated the files with that and the spacing from above, lemme know if that looks okay.
Quote from: Radiak488417 on June 10, 2024, 07:48:19 PMOh huh, do we normally ever use 8vb? I don't recall seeing it on most sheets on the site and I've never put it in a sheet of mine before.
Arranger's choice, though personally I always opt to do so because I don't see any downside in disambiguating.
I think that's an
approval from me :)
image.png
Quote from: Latios212 on June 18, 2024, 02:20:08 PMSorry, missed that! I updated the files with that and the spacing from above, lemme know if that looks okay.
Looks great to me, thanks again!
Everyone's done a great job with feedback on this one, looks solid, and I will accept
This submission has been accepted by Kricketune54 (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=6528).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot