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NinSheetMusic => Submission Center => Submission Archive => Topic started by: Zeta on November 16, 2018, 04:59:01 AM

Title: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Zeta on November 16, 2018, 04:59:01 AM
Submission Information:

Series: Pokémon
Game: Pokémon X & Pokémon Y
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: Santalune City
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: gunthi (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=5573)

[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Libera on November 16, 2018, 12:51:18 PM
There's something very funny going on with your .mus file, and then font on your pdf doesn't match the .mus either.  For submissions to NSM, the pdf file must be made from the .mus file. 

By very funny, I mean this:

Spoiler
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/136239922913869824/513092527142862919/unknown.png
[close]

I'd suggest reading the formatting guidelines and if you need any help, feel free to ask.  At the moment I don't think this submission is in a state that I can review effectively at the moment so I'll hold off on that for now.

Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on November 16, 2018, 01:57:08 PM

Relatively to the "funny", in my computer it opens ok, I don't understand what happens.

Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on December 03, 2018, 08:53:35 AM
Updated!
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on December 09, 2018, 05:07:10 PM
Hey, this is a great start! Solid arrangement. :)

Just looking right now, one of the things you can improve on is articulation. How are the melody notes played? Take a look and see, for instance, where staccatos would be in order - like the eighth notes in the melody of m. 2. (You also need dynamics - just an opening one would be fine here.)

Aside from that, there are some inaccuracies here and there I'm seeing (just listing some) -
- The harmonies aren't all A for the first bunch of dyads. The melody also does a triplet on beat 3.5 in the first measure.
- Is the C-D-E triad intentional in m. 2 and other places? It doesn't look like the D really belongs or adds anything.
- Measure 12, the A-C dyad on m. 12 beat 2.5 should be G-C.
- Measure 14, the first triplet should be G#-A-B.
Take another pass through it and check that you have everything right.

Additionally, it looks like there are a few odd things related to spacing probably due to Finale Notepad. Once you've gone over it for the above stuff, I'd be happy to help you improve the layout a little bit. Any questions, feel free to ask!
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on December 13, 2018, 08:50:44 AM
Hi,

Thanks for your feedback :)
I fixed the first 5 points. But the spacing remains the same problem, because Finale Notepad doesn't allow me to change it.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: JDMEK5 on December 27, 2018, 10:46:43 PM
Here's one way to resolve your spacing problem (though I know I pushed my luck a little bit with the size of everything) (https://www.dropbox.com/s/f4dg5pj6tiss4ad/Pokemon%20X%20Pokemon%20Y%20-%20Santalune%20City%5Bspaced%5D.mus?dl=0)

I made some slight tweaks to your copyright to make it consistent with the other X/Y sheets on the site (and accurate for that matter).
Might I suggest looking into the possibility of adding some midrange chords on the off-beats to provide some motion (see the infamous "Athletic" theme from Super Mario World for an example of what I'm talking about). I think it would be difficult to play at this speed, yet possible, and really make the piece come alive. As it stands now, it is accurate (so far as this particular bass consideration is concerned), but is a bit lackluster in my opinion. Kageyama set you up for success and personally I would love to see you capitalize on it.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on January 04, 2019, 10:24:48 AM
It's updated. I think now is much more alive :)
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on January 14, 2019, 08:16:56 PM
Quote from: gunthi on January 04, 2019, 10:24:48 AMIt's updated. I think now is much more alive :)
It sure is ^^

However, this new accompaniment pattern brings with it new concerns aside from just the difficulty. Consider how these offbeat chords sound on the piano - they get very low in places like m. 9-10 and sound muddy as a result. Also think in those places: do you need the bass to be as low as it is there? Or can we raise some parts a bit to parallel the original's light, bouncy, playful feeling instead of making the arrangement sound like it's lumbering along heavily?
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Libera on March 10, 2019, 05:36:48 PM
Bump for arranger.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on April 03, 2019, 12:04:24 PM

Hi people. After a long time I am back!
I have transposed some notes by one 8va up. I hope you enjoy it ;)
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: AmpharosAndy on April 04, 2019, 09:06:54 AM
Cool arrangement! Very accurate in terms of notes from what I can see. I think some of those left hand off beat chords could be friendlier to jump to, I would struggle a bit with how it is now. Maybe just removing a note or two and/or inverting the chords could do the trick?
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on May 04, 2019, 04:24:37 PM
To help move this one along a bit:

- m. 3/7/21 beat 1 could just be a staccato eighth instead of a staccato dotted eighth.
- Could use layers in m. 8 similar to m. 4
- I think beat 3 in m. 15 should be F#-A#
- m. 14 beat 1 could use a bit of harmony
- Some of the single notes in m. 16-17 could use some harmony as well to keep dyads going consistently
- Measure 17 is missing a C on beat 3
- Beat 4 of m. 18 should be C sharp (not natural)
- I think some of the descending harmonies in the last measure aren't quite right. We could also use a slur here instead of tying over the notes in the chords
- D# in m. 4, 8, 22 should be Eb (C minor/major 7 chord)
- The forte in measure 20 would be better on the pickup to the melody (in measure 19).

Here's (https://www.dropbox.com/s/whi4d66ml0d5fgs/Santalune%20City.mus?dl=1) a file with the above edits that you can use. It doesn't change the bass/chords in the left hand but everything else should be good.

Please have a look, and consider what Andy and I had said about the left hand part! In particular the latter half of measure 9 sounds particularly muddy. But once the left hand part is resolved, this should be good to go :) let me know if you need any help
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on June 13, 2019, 02:41:09 PM

Hi :)
I hope you are fine. Many thanks for your suggestions. I am sorry for the very late reply, but I had many problems that I needed to solve in my life. I have some difficulties in some topics you mentioned. Maybe I should purchase the complete version of Finale (I only have Finale Notepad). I still did not because I did not have any job and could not spend much money. I have spent all this time trying to find a job. I think that from now on I can solve this, but if I need something I will tell you.

Thank you one more time :D
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on June 13, 2019, 02:44:41 PM

Which one do you recommend me to purchase?

https://store.makemusic.com/Store/
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on June 26, 2019, 06:19:11 PM
Hey gunthi, no worries! Take your time to sort out what's important to you.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Finale's full version isn't too unreasonable at university pricing ($99 USD), which is what I'd recommend getting if you are able to. But please don't if that means you miss out on buying life essentials or anything! We're more than happy to help you polish things up. 

As is the case with this one! I've already provided a .mus you can use (with Notepad) but I can help you edit those files into the submission as well as get that one part in m. 9 changed up a bit.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on August 05, 2019, 06:18:43 PM
Poke. This is really close - if I don't hear from you soon I'll make a couple of tiny final edits before we get this one accepted.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on September 06, 2019, 03:36:33 AM
Hi,

Sorry for the delay. In the last weeks I had very few time to come tothe forums because I will present many work in the college. From next week I will have more time ;)
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on October 06, 2019, 01:19:52 PM
How's it going, any better?

As I mentioned before just let me know and I can finish up the files for you if you can't.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on November 18, 2019, 06:40:15 AM
Hi Latios212,

Finally I'm back :D
I uploaded the most updated version, concerning the  left hand issue.

Once more, I am sorry for my long absence.

gunthi


Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on November 22, 2019, 02:08:59 PM
No problem, thanks for responding! It looks like the PDF isn't updated but the MUS is, and the only thing I can find wrong there is an out-of-place f dynamic in m. 16.

Once that is fixed I approve.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on November 26, 2019, 04:56:38 AM
It's fixed. And the PDF file is also updated ;)
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Latios212 on December 02, 2019, 03:56:11 PM
Awesome, thanks for fixing it!

(still approve!)
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Libera on December 19, 2019, 04:56:01 PM
This looks pretty nice, I just think that some of the harmony could be filled out more completely in places.  In bar 5 you're missing the third from the chord and also again in bar 11.  In both places it makes the resolutions fall flat a little whereas in the original you have the thirds coming from the chords in the banjo that lay out the harmony completely.  Other than that the accompaniment pattern and the melody etc look good as well as the formatting.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: gunthi on December 21, 2019, 06:59:45 AM
I added the third note in the harmonies of bars 5 and 11.
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Libera on December 22, 2019, 03:12:24 PM
Sweet, I also just realised that the bottom margin was slightly off so I've adjusted that myself since it was such a small change.  Glad to see this one get accepted!
Title: Re: [3DS] Pokémon X & Pokémon Y - "Santalune City" by gunthi
Post by: Zeta on December 22, 2019, 03:12:28 PM
This submission has been accepted by Libera (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=5291).

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot