Submission Information:
Series: Xeno
Game: Xenoblade Chronicles
Console: Wii
Title: Memories
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Zanza (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=6842)
[attachment deleted by admin]
Original song:
https://youtu.be/z7nTKKxPXZ8
(FIXED)
I'm having some issues with Finale Notepad.
On both .mus and .pdf files, you can notice there aren't measure numbers and mini titles.
I need to fix even other things on my first score too.
By the way I've used MusicXML cleaner.
So, if anybody is going to share their opinion on my score, please ignore these issues- looking forward to fixing them.
This a really pretty piece. Just a number of missing chord notes here and there to augment the current parts but nice job on this.
Formatting
- Very small nitpick, but I think most of the sheets list it as Monolift Soft, Nintendo not other way around. Developer, Publisher format
- Move the opening mp dynamic down a little and to the left so it's centered under beat 1
- Given this opens on a pickup, the pickup measure should be excluded from the measure count. I don't believe this can be done with Notepad but making light of it. For feedback purposes, I am going to say the measures as they are now, not by what they will be with this changed.
- m23 this mf can come done a little bit
- m39 this forte can be moved down a bit so it is centered between the staffs
- m49 move this forte a tiny bit right to center. But honestly I don't think forte as this is makes sense here given there's no dynamic change between this measure and m39 (when forte was previously introduced) in this arrangement currently. Did you intend to have more dynamic changes in between these sections?
Notes
- m2 RH beat 1 A under this C#
- m3 LH beat 2 this chord should be flipped and changed a bit. F# is on the bottom, with the other notes being An and D# in that order.
- m4 LH beat 1.5 is a G#
- m5 LH doesn't drop out on beat 2, beat 2 should be C#-E. beat 3 I actually hear an additional B above the B here currently. Beat 4 also has a B and D# above the F# as well
- m7 LH beat 2 missing D# and F# above the B
- m8 LH there's a B on beat 2 (between current notes), an A between the notes on beat 4
- m9 LH same pattern as above missing G# and and F#
- m12-14 RH I think this part would benefit from either being up an octave from the original, or some of the string harmonies included as a bottom layer to these notes. There's some chord depth currently missing in m12-14 with just the piano being transcribed
- m13 There is an F# half to Fn note (currently E#) move that takes place - perhaps if the RH notes are kept the same, at least include this half note on beat 1-2 as a lower layer
- m20 RH the roll sounds to be on beat 2, not beat 3
- m21 RH beat 1 A under the C# again
- m31 LH beat 1-2 this is actually F#-A-C#-F#
- m33 LH beat 1.5 and beat 3.5 are E and F# respectively
- m41 RH beat 3.5 and on there are some missing harmonies (in following order under current notes): E-D#-B. Same applies for m45 same notes
- m44 RH beat 2-4 I hear D#-F#-F# under each of the current notes
- m46 RH beat 2-4 B under the D# and G# under the B
- m47 RH beat 4 I hear a B under the D# and C# under the E and a D# under the F#
Remember me, the famous Divinity statue guy?
I remember you, the guy with amazing note-guessing skills 8)
I promise this score won't take 5 months like the other, yet it still has some work to be done
thanks
Bump for arranger.
What a good time to update my 2 only scores (
that have been abandoned for a lifetime)!
Will be uploading another soon too.
QuoteHonestly I don't think forte as this is makes sense here given there's no dynamic change between this measure and m39. Did you intend to have more dynamic changes in between these sections?
No, just thought crescendos/diminuendos needed dynamics before and after. Guess I'm wrong.
Updated the files- thank you.
Sorry for the late reply,
- m5 LH beat 2: C# is not restruck here. You can still hear a C# in the original track because the pedal is held.
- m12-14 RH: When you have 2 layers, they should usually be flipped away from each other, including the ties. Half notes in m13-14 can stay pointing up. I think you can fix this on notepad, but if not I can do that for you.
- m9 LH beat 1.5: Missing 8th note (C#, 2nd space) here.
- m10 LH: Both half notes here should be an octave up.
- Additional dynamics would be nice, like the dim. through m9-11. There are some other spots too.
- m13: F naturals should be E#s, this is a C# major chord.
- m17 RH beat 4: I think there's another B an octave below the top one.
- m18 RH: Right now, the B and Dn on beat 2.5-3 look like they're part of the melody because of how they're written (same layer, all beamed together). I'd recommend either breaking the beam between the Dn and G#, or putting those notes in another layer.
- I know you probably intended this to be a piano-only transcription, but NSM arrangements should (generally speaking) be reflective of the piece as a whole. This is not a piano solo, it's piano+orchestra. Of course, it's fine to leave parts out where they're not needed. But for example, there's nothing else going on in m22 LH, so adding the descending cello voice I think would be nice here.
- m26 RH beat 3: Similar thing to m18.
- m30: Fn should be E#
- m31-32 LH: Another spot you could include the string part, specifically the bass on some of the downbeats.
- m43 RH: I don't hear the melody re-articulate the C# on beat 3.5. It sounds like a dotted half note followed by two 8th notes in this measure.
- m45-49: Another good spot to add some dynamic contrast
- m50: Fn should be E#
Hey Static, thanks for the response.
I'll work on the score as soon as I can. I'm a bit busy at the moment.
Updated!
Got some things to say:
-I formatted the score to space things a bit more nicely. 3rd page is fuller, for example, and that's good imo.
-m12 I inverted the notes in Musescore but the ties at m13-14 don't work. Finale notepad lets me select the whole measure only
-I broke the beams in m18 and 26, but dunno if the Bn in the LH (m26) is right, since I inverted the note.
-I added the string/cello countermelody. It is fine in m22, but the one starting from m30 is 2 octaves lower, so it sounds more cello-like. I don't think anybody can play the 2 octave thing, also 1 octave lower sounds a bit bad imo. It also looks more playable with the left and right hand written like this. Another thing is that it ends with an An in m37, but it is very far away from both LH and RH, so I decided not to include it.
Changes look good. When I suggested adding the cello part, yeah I meant you should play around with it to make it playable, practical, and sound good, which I think you did. It's all about finding that balance when creating a solo piano arrangement. Some additional things:
- I didn't mention it before so edits would be easier for you to make, but your measure numbers are all off by 1; pickup measures should not be included in the measure numbering.
- When you have broken beams in a single layer (like in m26 RH [25 if you changed the numbers]), everything should be flipped in the default direction. So the Bn stem should face upwards.
- m22/30 (or 21/29) LH: I'd recommend putting an 8th rest in the 8th note layer on beat 3, just to avoid potential confusion there.
- Last measure RH: Fn should be E#
Anything you're unable to fix now in Notepad we'll get for you before we accept.
Updated
Ok so, do I have to do anything with the pickup measure? Finale counts it as n1
-m13 (or 12) the ties. Can't invert :(
-m22 (or 21) the 8th rest should be lower down
-m33 (or 32) the layers should be flipped, but forgot to do it in musescore 💀
-m35 (or 34) 2 of the ties look awkward
If you set it using the document>pickup measure, I think it doesn't count it as 1....
If it still does, use the measure tool and double click on the top of the 2 boxes for that measure and uncheck the box that says "include in measure numbering"
Here (https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1yD78aOK9tWBqBHpqg_RM6Hy7BlabV2QP?usp=sharing)'s the files with all the changes made. Feel free to upload these.
I also adjusted the rests in the pickup measure, since they should fit with the time signature (i.e. not be a whole rest; this isn't a 3/8 bar but rather the last three 8th notes of a 4/4 bar). If that makes sense...
I made some additional formatting adjustments as well:
- Extra space at the beginning of measures that have an arpeggio marking on beat 1.
- Moved whole notes to not intersect stems in other layers.
- Centered dynamic markings to be positioned over the center of notes. (De)crescendos shouldn't start or end directly on barlines.
- The layers in m33 and the ties in m34 actually look fine, so I left those alone.
If you're satisfied with those changes, I'll approve
I'm ok with the files.
I know I shouldn't really care, but I don't get why the 2 layers m32 LH should stay like that
QuoteWhen you have 2 layers, they should usually be flipped away from each other, including the ties. Half notes in m13-14 can stay pointing up.
while in m11 they are clearly separated. I want to understand to avoid mistakes in the future.
I'm gonna upload those files either way, thank you
Quote from: Zanza on September 26, 2022, 12:27:46 PMI know I shouldn't really care, but I don't get why the 2 layers m32 LH should stay like that
Oh I misread and thought you meant m33 (i.e. what is currently m33 in the most recent revision).
You're right that m32 should be flipped as I had mentioned previously. If you check that link I posted above, new files are up now with that fix
Done.
Sorry for the wait on this one! These last three months have been quite busy for most of us updaters
-The diminuendo from m8 to m10 is quite long for just going from mp to p: however, maybe you could crescendo to mf in m5 or 6 when the strings come in, so the diminuendo afterwards covers some more dynamic range?
-m12: You could tie the E# in the R.H. to m13 too, like you did in the L.H.
-m21: The E in the L.H. on beat 4.5 should be a D#. Also, you could move this cello line down an octave and add a C# in m22 if you want
-m22: The C#'s on beat 3 and 4 in the L.H. are also played in the R.H.: you could add parentheses to the ones in the L.H.
-m24: The B on beat 4 in the L.H. is also played by the R.H., you could parenthesize the L.H. one again or remove it (and make the note on beat 3.5 a quarter note), so the L.H. mirrors beats 1-2
-m25: I'd write this B-Dn motion in beat 2.5-3 in the R.H., since the R.H. already plays that same B on beat 1 too. It'd make this bar a little bit less confusing to read on first glance.
-m30: I think I hear an F# on beat 4 in the L.H.
-m30-31: Maybe you could tie over or extend some notes in the L.H., so there are no rests: rests kinda look weird in-between notes when you use pedal.
-m35: Maybe you could cross-staff the lower layer of the R.H. in beat 4-4.5 to the L.H., since the L.H. plays this same C# and is more able to play the B than the R.H.
-m41: I hear a G# on beat 2 in the L.H. instead of E
-m48-49: Instead of the decrescendo in the L.H., you could actually crescendo in m48 and decrescendo in m49 to imitate the swelling of the strings in that bar. Make sure to put the dynamic markings in-between the two staves, instead of underneath.
I've updated the files. Just a quick thing: other than everything you've listed, I've actually transcribed the cello in the mid of the song, so I added a new layer and everything (it's noticeable on the score). I've also updated the formatting and something here and there, but I don't remember precisely what I did because I tweaked the score some time ago but haven't updated it on the site back then, I apologize. Also, Static mentioned some formatting he did with the file; I would've updated the .mus, but I just can't find a way to work with Finale notepad, so the changes he did are basically gone.
Quote from: Zanza on January 30, 2023, 11:20:50 AMAlso, Static mentioned some formatting he did with the file; I would've updated the .mus, but I just can't find a way to work with Finale notepad, so the changes he did are basically gone.
Do you mean working with notepad in general? We don't want to be fixing some formatting every time if it can be avoided. I believe all of the changes you made should be able to be done in notepad too.
Some little things that popped up though (besides all the formatting things):
-m26: Make sure to add some rests before the B-Dn in the R.H., because currently it starts out of nowhere.
-m27-29: All quarter notes on beat 2 and 4 should have their stems flipped.
-m30: The E# in the R.H. is the same as in the L.H., you could add parentheses around one of them (preferably the R.H.), or remove the R.H. one and add a (dashed) line towards the one in the L.H. (which I could add for you too, if you can't get it to work in notepad)
Talking about parentheses though, did you have an opinion on this?
Quote from: Bloop on December 29, 2022, 11:39:42 AM-m22 (m23 in the current pdf): The C#'s on beat 3 and 4 in the L.H. are also played in the R.H.: you could add parentheses to the ones in the L.H.
I know there's feedback on this submission, I'll work on the score whenever I happen to find time. Thank you
I've just updated the files with correct formatting
Almost done! Just a few things (that coincidentally are all on a 3rd beat in the R.H.):
-m12: The sharp of the E# in the R.H. on beat 3 is missing.
-m25: There's a half rest in the R.H. on beat 3 that you could hide
-m29: You can move the left parenthesis in the R.H. a bit more left, currently it's clashing with the sharp. There's a parenthesis in the L.H. that should be deleted as well. Also, I think you can hide the lower 8th rest in the R.H. on beat 3, as it isn't strictly necessary, but it's not wrong either.
Bump for arranger, are you able to make these changes/agree with them so we can finish this up?
Sorry for the late reply... done everything except that "double rest" (apparently I'm not able to move rests on finale full version).
Files uploaded
Awesome! Then with that, I'm finally ready to accept!
https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/895351643024015360/906174892746108988/BloopApproves2.png
This submission has been accepted by Bloop (https://www.ninsheetmusic.org/forum/index.php?action=profile;u=1023).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot