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Messages - Static

#1831
[SAT] Sakura Wars - "Declaration! Imperial Floral Assault Group"
[MID] [MUS] [MUSX] [PDF] [Original]

NSM's first Sega Saturn sheet, and also the first sheet I've done with lyrics since I think the Maria & Draco opera from FFVI.
#1832
Since you haven't replied and you now have a more workable file, and expressed that anyone is allowed to finish it, I have in fact heavily revised your sheet. Because of this, I added "Edited by Static" to the sheet because I think I made some rather large decisions.

The formatting and measure distribution is much less cramped now, notes have been fixed and changed, the strings of 16th note triplets are now sextuplets, additional articulations have been added, some parts have been swapped (mainly in the final section), and the repeat is now a D.S. The files above have been updated with these changes

In the future, please submit fully finished arrangements. I only finished this one because I had the previous version lying around. But for now, I'll approve.
#1833
Looks great, Latios, I just went ahead and moved some of the staccato markings in m4, 6, 8, and 10 now that the 2nd layer rests are gone. All that's left is that one bit in m13. Personally, I think it might be better to differentiate the layers to clearly show the melody. But it's up to you.
#1834
This looks really good, I'm loving your attention to detail on the articulations and note lengths and everything. Just a few more things:

  • m1: Move the mezzoforte to the left just a bit so it's centered with the first beat.
  • m23, 27: The F naturals technically should be E#s since its a chromatic approaching note to F#; but since this piece is pretty bluesy and uses a lot of F naturals I have no issues with you keeping them.
  • m27 RH beat 1: I would put a staccato here.
  • m35-36 RH: I hear this instead (also move the crescendo down a bit):
    Spoiler
    [close]
  • m55 RH Beat 3: I would remove the staccato on this note and maybe even add a slur to better differentiate this specific note's length compared to the others.
  • m60 RH Beat 3.5: There is another C natural here, but if you want to leave it out to better separate the melody on beat 4 that's fine as well.

That's all I got, great work.
#1835
Done, but I didn't add the double barline because the intro and melody section that comes right after are the same stylistically, and because the intro is so short.
#1836
Quote from: NineLives on July 15, 2019, 07:48:10 PMYou didn't quite finish the sentence, but I think I fixed the first half of what you were talking about.
Oh oops, sorry, that was dumb; I was going to say that you only need to tie across barlines or across beats 2-3.

Anyways, the sheet looks great! I would just move the mezzoforte in m11 since it's clashing with some notes around it. Also, maybe you could find a way to incorporate the banjo part in beats 3-4 of m13? It's not really necessary but it's a cool little part.
#1837
    Thanks for doing this one, it's probably one of my favorite Mario Kart tracks/themes of all time.

    Now for some feedback stuff:
    • This song is actually in the key of G Major, but if you would prefer to have no sharps in the key signature to match the G mixolydian mode used in the piece, you're welcome to do so.
    • m3-10 RH: Generally, I like the harmonies you chose instead to make them closer to the melody. However, the melody is unnecessarily obscured by the other notes. To fix this, I would move the Gs on beat 1 of m4, 6, 8, and 10 to the 1st layer, and make the Es on beats 3-4 of m3, 5, 7 and 9 Gs (below the melody) instead. A general rule of thumb is to always keep the melody in its own layer so the reader knows what parts to bring out or to leave as an accompaniment. Here's what I mean:
      Spoiler
      [close]
    • Anywhere you have 2 8th notes tied over beats 1-2 or 3-4 (like in m11 and m15), make those a quarter note. You only need to use ties for 8th notes across barlines or across
    • m3-10 RH: All 8th notes should have staccatos here.
    • There are other spots like above where there could be some extra articulations. In general, the sheet is very inconsistent about articulation placement.
    • m35: The RH isn't doing much here, so you could move the current LH part to the RH and add the original bassline. I think this would give the ending a much more rich sound like in the original.

Nice arrangement!
#1838
Fixed, and also adjusted some of the 8va marking placements and made the repeat actually work in playback since it didn't before.
#1839
Everything should be fixed now, thanks for looking it over!
#1840
[PSV] Muramasa Rebirth - "Shigematsu Shinzaemon"
[MID] [MUS] [MUSX] [PDF] [Original]

Definitely one of the most frantic pieces I've arranged so far...
#1843
Site News / Re: Update, Friday 12th of July 2019
July 11, 2019, 06:45:35 PM
truly the dankest update
#1844
Replaced the files with new ones with all the changes.
#1845
Everything looks great! This is now officially New Dank City.