• I don't know if you have the flexibility to make this update- but the measure per system is a bit cramped for parts of page 1. You could try 5 measures per system for the entire arrangement, or 4 if there parts that look cramped with 5
• I spent a lot of time looking at the first 16 bars of this and listening. Here's what I think would work best (I need to still do a review of the LH a bit more at m7-8) for the RH and some of the LH. Lmk your thoughts on these potential changes, more or less I did my best to parse out the melody and incorporate other parts going on. Feel free to add accents and such, I didn't take that much time to look at that more just to correct notes
Edit Ideas for m1-m16 (Dropbox Link)
• m8-m16 I think the LH at this point should switch to the bassline. I like the idea of your part that you made for m1-8 incorporating a few different parts, but again have to look at it a bit more.
I would usually advise against using other arrangements as reference - this one in particular sounds like it is more a transcription than an arrangement. While we strive for accuracy here, we also strive to make sure arrangements are playable (not that yours isn't, but there are some things that this arrangement you linked would not be playable unless you had three hands, to confirm your suspicions).
However one thing I do think I picked up on from this linked arrangement which differs from how you arranged is that the melody on your sheet is placed up an octave from m17 and on. Usually we try to make sure the melody stays in its original octaves and move down harmonies unless there's some part that's more important at some point in a song.
So with that said I think you could make some changes to your current RH part from m17 and on and move the notes to their original octave where applicable - may need to make modifications to the LH as a result (looking at page 2), but as I said in my first post, there is a lot to go through so I'm trying to keep things manageable. As a starting point for adjusting the LH, could follow what I did for m9-16 LH, which is just the bassline basically.
• I spent a lot of time looking at the first 16 bars of this and listening. Here's what I think would work best (I need to still do a review of the LH a bit more at m7-8) for the RH and some of the LH. Lmk your thoughts on these potential changes, more or less I did my best to parse out the melody and incorporate other parts going on. Feel free to add accents and such, I didn't take that much time to look at that more just to correct notes
Edit Ideas for m1-m16 (Dropbox Link)
• m8-m16 I think the LH at this point should switch to the bassline. I like the idea of your part that you made for m1-8 incorporating a few different parts, but again have to look at it a bit more.
Quotem20 and m28 unsure what to change about inner notesOn the inner notes - I meant that it's typically easier to play multiple notes at the start of a phrase than on beat 2 for example (looking at current m19). But also, having a chord at the start of a measure when it is heard in the original source at the start just makes sense from a setting the chord tone and accuracy standpoint. So at m17 for example beat 1 in the RH would be spelled out as An-En-Cn-An
I would usually advise against using other arrangements as reference - this one in particular sounds like it is more a transcription than an arrangement. While we strive for accuracy here, we also strive to make sure arrangements are playable (not that yours isn't, but there are some things that this arrangement you linked would not be playable unless you had three hands, to confirm your suspicions).
However one thing I do think I picked up on from this linked arrangement which differs from how you arranged is that the melody on your sheet is placed up an octave from m17 and on. Usually we try to make sure the melody stays in its original octaves and move down harmonies unless there's some part that's more important at some point in a song.
So with that said I think you could make some changes to your current RH part from m17 and on and move the notes to their original octave where applicable - may need to make modifications to the LH as a result (looking at page 2), but as I said in my first post, there is a lot to go through so I'm trying to keep things manageable. As a starting point for adjusting the LH, could follow what I did for m9-16 LH, which is just the bassline basically.