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[NDS] Radiant Historia - "The Garden Where the Celestite Lies" by Renaud Bergeron

Started by Zeta, September 21, 2018, 06:07:37 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Other
Game: Radiant Historia
Console: Nintendo DS
Title: The Garden Where the Celestite Lies
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Renaud Bergeron

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Khunjund

Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Maelstrom

First of all, thanks for some radiant historia stuff. I love this soundtrack.
Before the nitty gritty, there's one big issue with the arrangement - the bassline in m11-18, 17-18, and 33-36. It's staccato and there are harmonies on the off beat every single time.

Khunjund

I made this arrangement a while ago and I posted it without really reviewing it. Should be a little better for now.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Maelstrom

Some feedback
m4-6 has 3rd harmonies on the Ebs and Fs following them
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If you want to leave them out because they muddy everything, that's fine too. Also in m9-10 and page 2
It might be easier if the RH didn't take the LH's part in m10, because the poco rit. builds in enough space for the LH to jump down to the Bb. also in m32
Honestly, I'm not feeling the slurs as phrase markings. I'd take them out unless they are specifically slurring something
all of RH m11 is staccato (also m15)
While I do think they should have tenutos, m13 and 14's RH half notes should be quarter notes.
m17-18 RH - those rests should be Bbs
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m19-26 - I don't think this is a very good representation of the original. The bass is much deeper in this part than others, but it sounds empty because the higher part was included instead. I'd recommend re-writing this section like this:
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It keeps the fullness of the original, while only losing the minor high part.
I hear some harmonies in the RH in m
m55 - maybe swap the RH back to the LH here so it's easier to go straight back into the main part on the repeat.

This might look like a lot, but it's mostly minor nitpicks. You did an excellent job with this and I'd love to see more radiant historia sheets from you.

Khunjund

Updated.

For measures 19–26, I like to have my cake and eat it, too ;D. Actually, since the original keeps a Bb pedal under the 1-b7-n6-b7 progression, I was thinking of doing the same, i.e. have the left hand strike an octave in measure 19, a seventh in measure 21, a sixth in measure 23, etc.

I'd like to keep 54 and 55 in the right hand, so as to mirror measures 1 and 2. As for the harmony, yes, there's a Bb minor triad, but the fade-in translates poorly to piano and the range overlaps the ostinato; I don't think it's a great loss to omit it.

I took away a bunch of slurs; I must've been thinking of portato when I first made this arrangement, but that's clearly not the technique being employed. I kept some in to indicate actual slurs as well as the legato section.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Maelstrom


Latios212

Nice work, just a couple things:
- Is there a reason in m. 13 you have tenuto quarter notes instead of their actual lengths (half notes)?
- In m. 19 (and the similar measures that follow), I'm hearing the LH beat 2 as an F, not Ab. And in m. 20 and similar, beat 3 as Ab instead of Bb.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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turtle

Khunjund

For measures 13 and 14, I'm pretty sure the sound only sustains for a quarter note, and Maelstrom seemed to agree with this. I've fixed the glockenspiel notes, however.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Latios212

My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Khunjund

Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Latios212

My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Zeta