[DELETED] [GBA] Mario Kart: Super Circuit - "Shy Guy Beach / Cheep Cheep Island" by xenophanes

Started by Zeta, April 18, 2019, 09:09:38 AM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Mario Kart
Game: Mario Kart: Super Circuit
Console: Game Boy Advance
Title: Shy Guy Beach / Cheep Cheep Island
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: xenophanes


mastersuperfan

You're missing a bass note at the end of m3. I also think that the bass rhythm m18–23 shouldn't have sixteenth rests between some of the notes—they sound all fully held out to me.

The bass should also be an octave lower than it's currently written. As is, I feel like it goes too high sometimes and the sheet loses the feel of having a bass at all.

The quarter notes on beats 3 and 4 of m25 should have staccatos (both hands).

Last note in m17 should be an F, not an E.

I think this is the actual rhythm for the first measure:



Similarly, this is the rhythm for the last measure:



The rhythms between m3 and m5 are also a little different. See below:



As you've written, m3 is just a set of quarter triplets, but m5 is actually different because the last note is a little delayed as above. Same goes for the next phrase: m11 is as you've written, but m13 is different.

You have some Layer 2 sixteenth notes in m18–23 that represent the trumpet in the original, but the note is actually doubled in an octave in the original, so I would make them all octaves to match this.

The sheet is very solid as a framework of the original, but I think the biggest improvement that can be made is implementing the harmonies that go on throughout the whole track. Without them, the arrangement sounds kind of empty and slow. Just like you've incorporated harmonies in Layer 2 of the right hand in m16, I suggest you try to do that for the whole first half of the sheet, again with Layer 2 playing concurrently with the main melody. There are also prominent harmonies in m17 and m20–25 that would really help to sound the arrangement sound more full. Try working with these harmonies and seeing how you can incorporate them, and we'll see how that turns out and move from there.
Quote from: NocturneOfShadow on February 11, 2016, 03:00:36 PMthere's also a huge difference in quality between 2000 songs and 2010 songs
Quote from: Latios212 on February 11, 2016, 03:29:24 PMThe difference between 2000 songs and 2010 songs is 10 songs.

Latios212

Going to archive this one for inactivity. Feel free to resubmit once you take into account the above feedback, and let us know if you need any help!
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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