[MUL] Leisure Suit Larry 5: Passionate Patti Does a Little Undercover Work - "Theme Song" by Nine Li

Started by Zeta, June 30, 2020, 05:51:59 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Other
Game: Leisure Suit Larry 5: Passionate Patti Does a Little Undercover Work
Console: Multiplatform
Title: Theme Song
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Nine Lives

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NineLives


Static

  • Maybe change the "Swing!" text to just "Swing 8ths" to match the "Straight 8ths" text.
  • m4, 8 RH: Consider changing layer 2 to En-Bn, to get the clash between Bn and Cn that's in the original.
  • m4, 8 RH: You can hide the 2nd layer half rest and flip layer 1 down on beats 3-4.
  • m9 RH: A#s should be Bbs here since it is an F chord (F7#5).
  • m10 RH: For the first chord, I hear En-Bb-Db-Eb.
  • m11 RH: In the first chord, the bottom Dn should be a Cn. Beats 1.5-2 should be spelled with flats. On beat 4.5, the low G should be an F.
  • m14 LH: The LH notes on beats 1, 2, 3, and 3.5, should be up an octave (maybe even just put them in the RH, up to you).
  • m14 LH: Since all the chords in this measure are the same (augmented 7th chord planing), you should spell them with the same intervals. I recommend this:

    Note that I also adjusted the LH on beat 2.5 to match the interval between beats 1-1.5.
  • m17 RH beat 1: There should be a D# here (either high or low would be fine).
  • m17 RH beat 2: Since the Bb is the melody, it should be on top. Move the C an octave lower or remove it entirely, up to you. There should be an Ab and Dn under the Bb, no G.
  • m17 RH beat 3: This chord should be Gn-An-Bn-En.
  • m17 RH beat 3.5: This note should be a Cn instead of C#.
  • m17 RH beat 4: Similar to beat 2, the F# (which should be changed to a Gb by the way) should be on top. The notes below it should be Eb, Cn, and Bb, but you might only want to include the Eb since it's a large jump from and to the surrounding notes.
  • m18 beat 2: This chord moves down in parallel, so the G# should be Ab.
  • m20 beats 3-4: I'm not too fond of the voicing here; in the original you have a very clear bassline like in the rest of the piece, not a lot of other low register stuff. I would just keep the chord voices in the RH. I would actually suggest using the full chords here in m20 (D-F#-A-C#-E and D-F-Ab-C-E), even though it's a stretch for the RH, it's definitely doable and fine for a short segment like this. If you want to try something else, maybe just put the 5th (F#, Fn) in the LH, and move the 3rd (Dn) an octave up.
  • m21: Same thing about chord voicing.
  • m23, 25 RH: The first dyad should be spelled with sharps since it chromatically approaches the next dyad.
  • m26 LH: There should be a low C on beat 1.
  • m29 RH: Some extra articulations would be nice here, it's pretty noticable in the original.
  • m33 RH: Beats 3-4 should have more notes in the middle.
  • Everything I said about m13-25 also applies to m36-49.
  • I recommend removing any parentheses around courtesy accidentals. This sheet already has a lot of accidentals, so the parentheses sometimes create unnecessarily large amounts of empty space in the staff.
  • You don't need courtesy accidentals when you start a new line (like in m17).

NineLives

All right. I think I got all changes from that big list done, but I wouldn't doubt that I may have missed something somehow, so please tell me if I did! Either way, the files have been updated!


Maelstrom

m30 LH b1 - This should be an En an octave below where it is now.

No D.S to m9?

Otherwise, it looks fine.

NineLives


Maelstrom


Zeta