Atcero's Halloween Sheet - Gargoyle's Quest II - Dark Forest of Hidon

[Atcero]

The spookiest song in the game imo

[Static]

Cool sheet you got here!

• I actually hear this entire piece in 6/8... You'll have to go though and edit a bunch of the rhythms. However, my following feedback will be written according to you current 3/4 sheet, so hopefully it won't be too confusing. If anyone else hears this in 3/4, I'd like to hear from you, but to me this is definitely 6/8.

Rhythm feedback if this piece is really in 3/4, but I don't think it is, so please ignore lol

• In 3/4 time, the general rule is to always show beat 3 when working with notes shorter than a half note. This means a few things:
• In m1-3, the 8th note should be tied to the quarter note (just flip the two notes around). This way, you can clearly see where beat 3 lands because of the tie.
• Whenever you have a quarter note on beat 2.5 (examples would be m5 RH and m8 LH), it should be written as two tied 8th notes. This applies anywhere you see that kind of rhythm.
• Going a bit deeper, I'm going to talk about 16th note rhythms now. The general rule for 16th rhythms is that each beat, that is to say each grouping of four 16th notes, needs to be clearly shown. Let's look at m12 LH as an example:
  
  I marked where each beat falls with a long line, and each 16th note subdivision with a short tick. As you can see, the beams and rests obscure where these beats fall. So, let's rewrite this in a way where all the beats are shown:
  
  By beaming it like this, it makes it easier for the reader to keep track of the beat, which helps in sight-reading. But, it still looks a little cluttered. Let's fix it up a little by using some staccato articulations:
  
  Hopefully everything I said just makes sense, but if you have any questions let me know. You'll need to take look at m12-15 LH with these principles in mind. If you want extra help, then check out this guide by Latios (it says 4/4 but most of these things also apply to 3/4).

[close]

i totally didn't just write this entire section and then realize afterward it was 6/8

Feedback:

• m5-8 LH Beat 2 should be F, just like in m4 LH.
• m12-13 RH should look like this:
• That 16th note/grace note rhythm in m16/18 RH should just be a 16th note triplet.
• The last two 16th notes in m17/19 RH should also be a 16th triplet (8th note + 16th, C + Bb; the grace note should still be a grace note).
• The upper notes in the LH in m12-15 sound like they should be long (like a dotted 8th note).
• Various formatting things: tempo marking misaligned, copyright info too small and not needed on page 2, page titles/numbers should be within the margins, there's enough room to fit this all onto one page, etc. Let's get the notes taken care of first and then I'll edit the file for you.

[Atcero]

Should be all good to go and updated, thank you!

[Static]

Looks good! I went ahead and made the other formatting changes for you and also edited some rhythms/notes a bit more:

- m5-8 LH beat 3 (i.e. the first 8th note) should be F
- The LH rhythm in m12-13 sounds like it should be like m14-15
- The last 8th note in m13/15 was changed from Eb to Db.
- m16/18 RH 16th note rhythm was changed to 16th note triplets instead of normal 16ths
- Tempo marking was changed to dotted quarter notes to match the 6/8 time signature

Here's the file with all the changes. If you like what you see, feel free to upload it to the folder.

Also with this, I approve now

[Libera]

Sorry for the delay in my checking.  I've gone through it now and have my feedback.  If there are any edits that you need more / another updater to do, let me know.

-Everywhere except the opening three bars should have the left hand an octave lower.
-With the left hand figure in bars 8-11 and 16-19, the second and fourth notes should be a C and a Dn, respectively.
-The Dbs in in the RH of bars 16 and 18 should be Dns.
-The F at the start of the RH in bar 4 actually only plays the first time round, I'd suggesting bracketing it with a 'first time only' note.
-The middle voice is seemingly left out of this arrangement entirely which is a shame.  You can include it verbatim in bars 16-19 and also pretty easily (with some octave fudging) in bars 12-15.  Including it in bars 8-11 is more tricky, and whilst you could probably make some sort of hybrid left hand by combining it with the bass, it's probably quite difficult and I'm fine if you want to keep it simple there.

Other formatting comments:

-Missing opening dynamic.
-Copyright text /url should be size 10 rather than 12.
-Your top margin is really deep and I'd recommend using 0.5/0.5/0.5 for top, right hand side and bottom margins to give the sheet a more uniform look.  I'm guessing you didn't set these margins yourself and are probably just hanging over from some weird import or default setting.

[Atcero]

I'll get that done! Oddly enough, I have the Dn in the original file so it must have gotten messed up during formatting. I'll need a bit of help with that once I get it updated if thats fine

[Atcero]

I believe it is all updated now!

[Libera]

It looks as if the margins and general formatting has gone perhaps even more awry now, but that's fine since I can just tidy it up afterwards.  Before I do that, a few things I should say:

Things that I can fix myself when I tidy it up:

-This should all still fit on one page easily.
-The note shouldn't be at the top.  It should probably be in between the staves in bar 4.
-The bracket and asterisk entered for the note should be expressions rather than text (so that they attach to the staves properly).  Also the asterisk doesn't need to exist.
-General margin fixing between systems and over the whole sheet per my earlier comment.
-Copyright/url is misaligned horizontally, which is a new one for me.

Things you need to respond on:

-My original thinking for including the middle voice in bars 12-15 was that it would sit under the right hand (with octaves adjusted so that it's playable).  Although it's now at pitch in the left hand, those stretches are really awkward to play which is why I think it'd be easier in the right hand.
-This is a situation where I'd recommend slurring your grace notes due to the multiple layers in bars 17 and 19 (and then it'd be better to slur the ones elsewhere for consistency).

After you've addressed those last two comments I'll fix up the rest of the comments and it should be good to go.  If you're happy with those two comments and would prefer me to make all of the edits, that's fine too.  Just let me know what you want.

[Atcero]

Should be all good to go now (minus the formatting), thanks for all your help!

[Libera]

Great, I've put my edited file up now.  Here's what I changed.

-This should all still fit on one page easily.
-The note shouldn't be at the top.  It should probably be in between the staves in bar 4.
-The bracket and asterisk entered for the note should be expressions rather than text (so that they attach to the staves properly).  Also the asterisk doesn't need to exist.
-General margin fixing between systems and over the whole sheet per my earlier comment.
-Copyright/url is misaligned horizontally, which is a new one for me.

-All of this^.
-Changed ties on graces into slurs.
-Fixed the beaming of the RH in bar 15.
-Added bar numbers.
-Flipped the LH notes in bars 12-15.
-Aligned the title and game title.

Let me know if the file looks good and I'll accept.

[Atcero]

Sounds good to me, thank you!

[Libera]

Awesome, accepted!