[PC] The Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky SC - "Hamel" by SlimyWyvern

Started by Zeta, May 30, 2021, 09:16:59 AM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Other
Game: The Legend of Heroes: Trails in the Sky SC
Console: PC
Title: Hamel
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: SlimyWyvern

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Static

The console label for this game should just be PC, since that's what it was originally only released on in 2006 (similar to FC on site). Latios can change that later I think

Latios212

Quote from: Static on May 30, 2021, 11:20:07 AMThe console label for this game should just be PC, since that's what it was originally only released on in 2006 (similar to FC on site). Latios can change that later I think
Got that updated :P
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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Libera

This looks great, I've just got a few things to say.

-I don't hear the E in the chord in bar 20.
-I think it'd be easier to read if you swapped clefs on beat 3 of bars 19-20 rather than on beat 2; that way it also matches how you did it earlier.
-I think it'd be clearer to write in the harmony in bars 30+ as a separate layer.  That way it would also be easier to see the chord changes every two bars (usually).
-It might there a reason for the chord in bar 32 getting three harmony notes when the others don't?  For one, that chord is kind of awkward to play, but also for consistency it might be better to leave out that bottom D.  If you're worried about missing out the third of the chord, you could always put that D up the octave, but I think it's probably fine without it (the chord is fully outlined by the LH anyway).
-For consistency, I'd try to stick to the same voicings for the guitar strums/rolls in 37 and 46.  I think either bass + fifth + 3 notes in RH, or bass + 3 notes in RH would be best i.e. I'm suggesting you either take out the top A in the LH of 37 and add fifths to the LH of 46, or take out both the top A and the fifth in 37.

Nice work!

SlimyWyvern

Quote from: Libera on June 09, 2021, 01:04:48 PM-I think it'd be clearer to write in the harmony in bars 30+ as a separate layer.  That way it would also be easier to see the chord changes every two bars (usually).
That was actually the first thing I did, but I thought the way the ties looked was a little messy. Especially in m. 40-44 where the second layer is kind of sandwiched between the octaves. And should I still keep it in a second layer on m.44? Because when I do, the whole notes cover up the dot on the dotted half notes.

Quote from: Libera on June 09, 2021, 01:04:48 PM-It might there a reason for the chord in bar 32 getting three harmony notes when the others don't?  For one, that chord is kind of awkward to play, but also for consistency it might be better to leave out that bottom D.  If you're worried about missing out the third of the chord, you could always put that D up the octave, but I think it's probably fine without it (the chord is fully outlined by the LH anyway).
Yeah, I knew this would be a hard chord to play, though I could just barely reach it even with my small hands so I thought maybe it was still doable. I think I'm going to leave the lower D out since it is already in the LH like you said.

Quote from: Libera on June 09, 2021, 01:04:48 PM-For consistency, I'd try to stick to the same voicings for the guitar strums/rolls in 37 and 46.  I think either bass + fifth + 3 notes in RH, or bass + 3 notes in RH would be best i.e. I'm suggesting you either take out the top A in the LH of 37 and add fifths to the LH of 46, or take out both the top A and the fifth in 37.
Good idea, I think I'll go with the former suggestion because I want the last two chords to sound a bit fuller. Thank you for the feedback!

Libera

Quote from: SlimyWyvern on June 10, 2021, 01:40:19 PMThat was actually the first thing I did, but I thought the way the ties looked was a little messy. Especially in m. 40-44 where the second layer is kind of sandwiched between the octaves. And should I still keep it in a second layer on m.44? Because when I do, the whole notes cover up the dot on the dotted half notes.

There are some options for getting around this by moving ties and notes etc. but on trying it myself I think it's going to be more messy than it's worth.  Happy to leave it as you currently have it.

The other two things you said sound good as well.  I guess you're waiting for my response before updating the files.  I'll probably approve when you put them up.

SlimyWyvern

Quote from: Libera on June 12, 2021, 07:44:08 AMThe other two things you said sound good as well.  I guess you're waiting for my response before updating the files.  I'll probably approve when you put them up.
Yes, of course, I've updated them with all the other small changes as well. Hope it looks okay now.

Latios212

Nice sheet, it looks, sounds, and plays great!

A few minor things:
- For 8vas that span multiple systems, use one continuous line (you can extend it over multiple systems). This will get rid of the hooks at the end of the systems when the 8va continues to the next system, and add parentheses around the 8va on subsequent systems.
- Make sure you re-beam beats 1-2 in m. 19-20.
- Regarding spacing on page 2, I'd put a little bit more space between systems as there's a bit of extra space at the bottom. The second system could also probably use just a bit more space between LH/RH staves because the notes get pretty close in places like m. 23.
- Misaligned note on beat 1 of m. 35
- You have an accent over a rest in m. 37... should it be under the RH chord?
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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SlimyWyvern

Quote from: Latios212 on June 16, 2021, 06:21:21 PM- Make sure you re-beam beats 1-2 in m. 19-20.
Sorry, but is there something with those measures in particular? I'm not sure exactly what to "re-beam" here.

Quote from: Latios212 on June 16, 2021, 06:21:21 PM- You have an accent over a rest in m. 37... should it be under the RH chord?
Agh...yeah it just put it above the rest for some reason. Maybe I should get rid of the A on beat 1 and put the r.h. chords on the first layer instead? On the other hand, the accent isn't totally necessary, so I could remove it.

I'll wait for your response before I update it.

Latios212

Quote from: SlimyWyvern on June 17, 2021, 01:58:30 PMSorry, but is there something with those measures in particular? I'm not sure exactly what to "re-beam" here.
Yeah. Connect the four notes with one beam just like everywhere else (since it looks like you had previously disconnected them as part of the clef change

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My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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SlimyWyvern

Oh that! Yes, I managed to fix that now. What do you think of the other suggestion I made?

Latios212

Oh sorry, forgot to reply to that :) yeah, I think just removing it would be fine.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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[close]
turtle

SlimyWyvern


Latios212

My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle