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cacabish's Colors Sheet

Started by cacabish, July 20, 2021, 12:19:58 PM

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cacabish

Here is first (and probably definitely only) sheet for the Colors project from the wonderful game, Bug Fables! :D
I'll try to keep the attached PDF file up-to-date with the .musx revisions, so that people can just look at that.


"Blessed Golden Lands"*
[PC] Bug Fables: The Everlasting Sapling
[MUSX] [PDF]


*The actual title of this piece is unclear. According to the composer's bandcamp, the title is just "Golden Lands", whereas according to the character you talk to in the game to set the music, it's called "Blessed Golden Lands".
I've chosen to use the latter on the logic that anyone playing the game and seeing the song title's there would be motivated to search for that and not just "Golden Lands". If you believe it should be the other title, do let me know!


Static

  • Going off the in-game OST is fine in this case.
  • Console should just be [PC] rather than [MUL], since it came out on PCs first - this is more something for the updaters when we upload the sheet later, nothing you really need to worry about now lol. Likewise, the copyright year should technically just be 2019, but that's not a big deal.
  • m4/12 LH beat 2.5: The D should be a G.
  • m8/16 LH beat 4: There's a B under the D.
  • m10 RH beat 2.5: I don't hear the grace note here.
  • m6/14 beats 1-2: The melody and accompaniment should still be legato here, but I'm assuming you wanted to emphasize the snare drum part here.
  • m16-17 RH: Missing a slur here (like in m8-9).
  • m17 LH beat 2: The lower F# should be Fn instead, or E# if you prefer.
  • m19 RH beat 4: The G is actually part of the off clarinet background voice, not the vibraphone melody.
  • m23-24 LH: This kinda looks weird and is pretty ambiguous to read. I think this would convey the same idea more clearly:

    Remember, articulation and note length are two separate things. Don't use staccatos just because you want a note to be shorter.
  • Going off the above, I would use quarter notes for all of the staccato half notes and dotted quarters throughout page 2.
  • Is there a reason why you only have a slur on the 16ths at the start of m25, and nowhere else in the same section?

cacabish

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • Console should just be [PC] rather than [MUL], since it came out on PCs first - this is more something for the updaters when we upload the sheet later, nothing you really need to worry about now lol. Likewise, the copyright year should technically just be 2019, but that's not a big deal.
Good to know! I wasn't exactly sure how the tagging work, but now I know! I've revised both, regardless.

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • m4/12 LH beat 2.5: The D should be a G.
  • m8/16 LH beat 4: There's a B under the D.
  • m10 RH beat 2.5: I don't hear the grace note here.
...
  • m16-17 RH: Missing a slur here (like in m8-9).
  • m17 LH beat 2: The lower F# should be Fn instead, or E# if you prefer.
All fixed!

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • m6/14 beats 1-2: The melody and accompaniment should still be legato here, but I'm assuming you wanted to emphasize the snare drum part here.
Yeah, that was the idea. However, I've decided to change it so it has some parallel structure with the neighboring measures, which I think works better.

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • m19 RH beat 4: The G is actually part of the off clarinet background voice, not the vibraphone melody.
This one took me a whole bunch of listens, but you're right! Wow!
But what should I do with it? I've put it on the second layer with the strings for now, but did you have something else in mind?

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • m23-24 LH: This kinda looks weird and is pretty ambiguous to read. I think this would convey the same idea more clearly:

    Remember, articulation and note length are two separate things. Don't use staccatos just because you want a note to be shorter.
  • Going off the above, I would use quarter notes for all of the staccato half notes and dotted quarters throughout page 2.
I concur. I often forget that, but yours works nicely without clutter, so I've implemented it.

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PM
  • Is there a reason why you only have a slur on the 16ths at the start of m25, and nowhere else in the same section?
Not really. I think I put it in there when I was listening, but now that I look at it (and listen to it) again, it's really not necessary.

I think that's everything! I've went and updated the files.
Also, thanks for your feedback, Static, I really appreciate it! Do let me know where there's more to be fixed. :)

Static

Quote from: cacabish on July 28, 2021, 07:10:30 PMBut what should I do with it? I've put it on the second layer with the strings for now, but did you have something else in mind?
Yeah, putting it in the 2nd layer is good. The idea is to just keep the melody in its own layer there, so it's easy to tell what the melody is.

One last thing, this is a very annoying Finale "feature" - when you add grace notes to groups of four 8th notes, the group splits. You might want to re-beam m14 LH. idk why Finale does that, it's really weird

cacabish

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 10:34:07 PMOne last thing, this is a very annoying Finale "feature" - when you add grace notes to groups of four 8th notes, the group splits. You might want to re-beam m14 LH. idk why Finale does that, it's really weird
An annoying feature, indeed. Thanks for catching that! I've fixed it now.

Static


Latios212

Sorry for the wait :)

- Not sure if this is just Finale, but a few of the dynamics look a bit further right than they should be. m. 34, 35, 42 - could poke these left a bit to be centered over the note.
- I would consider a slur on the lower layer in m. 19-20 to show the phrasing there. In particular the D looks like it could be part of the upper layer. Similarly, it might help to put one on top of the upper layer in m. 21-22 to differentiate the legato part.
- Top layer F# in m. 22 beat 3 should be a half note
- Wonder if you still want to keep the staccatos in m. 23? The melody isn't particularly detached in the original there, and there is a contrast between how those notes are articulated vs. the notes in the next couple of measures
- For m. 33-34 and 41-42 the top E should be in its own voice sustained throughout the pair of measures.

Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 01:45:41 PMm19 RH beat 4: The G is actually part of the off clarinet background voice, not the vibraphone melody.
Quote from: cacabish on July 28, 2021, 07:10:30 PMBut what should I do with it? I've put it on the second layer with the strings for now, but did you have something else in mind?
Quote from: Static on July 28, 2021, 10:34:07 PMYeah, putting it in the 2nd layer is good. The idea is to just keep the melody in its own layer there, so it's easy to tell what the melody is.
I would suggest just omitting it. The second layer here follows the (strings?) which ascends in single notes. The clarinet part here just rhythmically outlines the G chord throughout the measure so I wouldn't say it's important to write in on beat 4 when you haven't included it anywhere else.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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cacabish

#7
Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- Not sure if this is just Finale, but a few of the dynamics look a bit further right than they should be. m. 34, 35, 42 - could poke these left a bit to be centered over the note.
Okay, no biggie! Adjusted.
Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- I would consider a slur on the lower layer in m. 19-20 to show the phrasing there. In particular the D looks like it could be part of the upper layer. Similarly, it might help to put one on top of the upper layer in m. 21-22 to differentiate the legato part.
Ooh, a very good suggestion! I've done so. I am slightly worried that the slur from m19-20 might swoop a bit too low, though, so let me know if that's the case.
Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- Top layer F# in m. 22 beat 3 should be a half note
Done!
Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- For m. 33-34 and 41-42 the top E should be in its own voice sustained throughout the pair of measures.
Yeah, I had this originally, but worried about playability. However, now that I reexamine it, it's not too bad. Reinstated!
Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PMI would suggest just omitting it. The second layer here follows the (strings?) which ascends in single notes. The clarinet part here just rhythmically outlines the G chord throughout the measure so I wouldn't say it's important to write in on beat 4 when you haven't included it anywhere else.
Good point. It certainly also makes it look cleaner this way too. As such, I've removed it.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- Wonder if you still want to keep the staccatos in m. 23? The melody isn't particularly detached in the original there, and there is a contrast between how those notes are articulated vs. the notes in the next couple of measures
This I'm not quite sure of. I mean, it's just the same vibraphone that played the melody in m. 19-22, right? Do those staccatos need to go as well? Furthermore, if I were to edit m. 23, wouldn't I also need to edit m. 24 since it's just a continuation of the melody (I'm pretty sure that's logical, but I'm just checking)? Or am I missing the point here? Are you saying that I should introduce contrast, despite it being the same instrument as m.19-22? If you would expound some more, I'd appreciate it.

Anyway, I've gone ahead and updated the submission file with all the suggestions implemented, save the suggestion about the staccatos in m. 23. :)

Latios212

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2021, 01:00:51 PM- Wonder if you still want to keep the staccatos in m. 23? The melody isn't particularly detached in the original there, and there is a contrast between how those notes are articulated vs. the notes in the next couple of measures
Quote from: cacabish on September 27, 2021, 09:39:39 PMThis I'm not quite sure of. I mean, it's just the same vibraphone that played the melody in m. 19-22, right? Do those staccatos need to go as well? Furthermore, if I were to edit m. 23, wouldn't I also need to edit m. 24 since it's just a continuation of the melody (I'm pretty sure that's logical, but I'm just checking)? Or am I missing the point here? Are you saying that I should introduce contrast, despite it being the same instrument as m.19-22? If you would expound some more, I'd appreciate it.
Gotcha! Yeah I should have been more clear about it. The transition between the vibraphone in m. 23 and the staccato melody in m. 24 is what caught me as off. The vibraphone doesn't really strike me as super detached, so I would actually just suggest removing the staccatos from 19-24.

I chatted with Cacabish just now over Discord and we agreed on the above plus made a couple of other minor spacing fixes so I will accept now! :)
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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