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Th3Gavst3r's Halloween Sheet

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Static:
Looks great! The ties especially look much better now, but if you wanted to do some more tiny adjustments, I'd align the right side of the ties as the beginning of m4, and in m7.

Bloop:
Nice work! This will probably be the happiest sheet this Halloween, haha.

Anyway, onto my comments (all right hand stuff):
-m4 and m12: The Fb's in the second layer here should be En's too.
-m11: The courtesy accidental Ab here isn't really needed right? You're not coming from an An or something.
-m20: The should be a staccato on the 8th note Bb at beat 4.5
-m22: Beat 2 and 4 (the C and Eb) are played shorter, maybe add staccatos or change them to 8th + 8th rests?
-m23: I hear a grace note C before the D before beat 3.
-m25: You can add the G to the grace note before beat 4.5 too: the thirds aren't that hard to play. If you do prefer a single note, I think it'd be better to choose the G anyway, as that is the melody.
-m28: There should be a staccato on the 8th note D at beat 4.5
-m29: Again a staccato on the D but now on beat 4
-m30: And like in m22, a staccato or 8th+8th rest at beat 2 and maybe beat 4, though that one is a bit longer.
-m33 and 41: I hear a grace note Cn before beat 1
-m37: Grace note Ab here too
-m45: Though not necessarily wrong, maybe you could rewrite the grace note before beat 4.5 as a C# instead of a Db, as the song is in a modulating part where these chords fit into Eb major more.

And a few things about the bass patterns:
-m17-32: Maybe you could add tenuto markings or legato slurs to the notes that don't have a staccato dot (except the tied notes), so it's a bit clearer which notes aren't staccato too.
-m33 and on: I'm not really sure if the bass pattern here needs those extra octaves and fifths: this voice is pretty subtle (if there at all sometimes), but it makes the left hand pattern a bit tiring because of all the repeated notes in the pinky. I think a better pattern would be something like the beginning part.
 

Th3Gavst3r:

--- Quote from: Static on October 29, 2021, 01:08:04 PM ---Looks great! The ties especially look much better now, but if you wanted to do some more tiny adjustments, I'd align the right side of the ties as the beginning of m4, and in m7.

--- End quote ---
I'm all about tiny adjustments. Fixing the ties already took hundreds of them, so I can do a couple more :P


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m4 and m12: The Fb's in the second layer here should be En's too.

--- End quote ---
Oops fixed em


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m11: The courtesy accidental Ab here isn't really needed right? You're not coming from an An or something.

--- End quote ---
I put the accidental there and in m3 because Ab isn't part of Gm7 so I thought it might be easy to miss, but maybe it's just a m7b9 chord instead. I changed the chord symbols to include the b9, but I'm still new to these chord things so let me know if that's right


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m20: The should be a staccato on the 8th note Bb at beat 4.5
-m22: Beat 2 and 4 (the C and Eb) are played shorter, maybe add staccatos or change them to 8th + 8th rests?

--- End quote ---
Ah yeah it looks like Finale keeps the midi duration from the import despite the written duration, so I didn't notice when listening back. Yet another thing to watch out for I guess. I just changed them all to staccatos, the m22 durations feel more staccato-y to me


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m23: I hear a grace note C before the D before beat 3.

--- End quote ---
Oh yeah, I had it in the original project but I must've accidentally deleted it at some point. Good catch


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m25: You can add the G to the grace note before beat 4.5 too: the thirds aren't that hard to play. If you do prefer a single note, I think it'd be better to choose the G anyway, as that is the melody.

--- End quote ---
I mentioned this is Static's feedback too, but I think it's kind of difficult to cleanly move 4 into 3-5 there at high tempo. It's a lot easier for me to just roll the whole hand from 2. I think either the top or bottom grace note is able to get the point across fine and they sound much different at tempo, but I'm not a very good pianist lol so if it's not actually a very hard fingering I can still change it


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m28: There should be a staccato on the 8th note D at beat 4.5
-m29: Again a staccato on the D but now on beat 4
-m30: And like in m22, a staccato or 8th+8th rest at beat 2 and maybe beat 4, though that one is a bit longer.

--- End quote ---
More of 'em, very sad :(
I left the stacatto off of m30b4. I expect there'll be a slight gap there anyway from repositioning for the next chord, and even if the player can pull it off without the gap I think I like the more legato sound than staccato anyway


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m33 and 41: I hear a grace note Cn before beat 1
-m37: Grace note Ab here too

--- End quote ---
I left these grace notes out because the player doesn't have much time to reegngage the pedal before they have to lift off the chord and move to the arpeggio, and I didn't want them to catch the clash from the grace note. Also freeing up the pinky lets you use it for the Eb to start the arpeggio which is a slightly nice. This also made me realize m37 wasn't the easiest thing in the world to pull off, so I moved the bottom Bb octave up to Eb instead


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m45: Though not necessarily wrong, maybe you could rewrite the grace note before beat 4.5 as a C# instead of a Db, as the song is in a modulating part where these chords fit into Eb major more.

--- End quote ---
I'm not sure about this one. I think it might be up to the player, but it's easier for me to parse the single natural accidental as a minor second rather than reprogramming my brain for the only sharp in the piece :P At least for readability, I think leaving it as Db is more useful than indicating where the modulation is going


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m17-32: Maybe you could add tenuto mark ings or legato slurs to the notes that don't have a staccato dot (except the tied notes), so it's a bit clearer which notes aren't staccato too.

--- End quote ---
I added some slurs, I think they make less visual clutter than tenutos


--- Quote from: Bloop on October 29, 2021, 03:23:23 PM ----m33 and on: I'm not really sure if the bass pattern here needs those extra octaves and fifths: this voice is pretty subtle (if there at all sometimes), but it makes the left hand pattern a bit tiring because of all the repeated notes in the pinky. I think a better pattern would be something like the beginning part.

--- End quote ---
I changed up the pattern a lot to have fewer doubled notes and a lot of alternating octaves instead. I added the fifths because unlike the first section the RH doesn't play offset accompanying chords, so the continuous bass octaves sounded kind of lame to me. There's a low guitar in there playing power chords that you can pull from, so I included some fifths for a little additional motion

Radiak488417:
This looks fantastic, I'm so glad this sheet is going to be on the site!

-For m8 RH, I've always heard the melody note on beat 3.5 as being an octave lower than you currently have it. I know it's a weird jump from the chord on beat 3 but that's what I hear as the more prominent note (you could leave out the F for playability if you want). I also hear a D on beat 4, you could include that instead of the F there if you wanted. Also shouldn't the chord symbol here be something more like Fm/Bb or Bb7sus2?
-For m23, you have the chord labeled as a Bb9sus in the sheet, and Static listed it as a Bb9sus4, but the 4th isn't actually there—it's a 7sus2 chord. Whenever I see "9sus" or "13sus", I usually infer that it's a sus4, but in this case since it's a sus2 which is a bit more uncommon I think just calling it an Fm/Bb might be better. I'm no expert on this though, so let me know if I'm wrong.

Sorry for the last-minute feedback, hope it's not too much trouble!

Th3Gavst3r:

--- Quote from: Radiak488417 on October 31, 2021, 03:48:59 AM ----For m8 RH, I've always heard the melody note on beat 3.5 as being an octave lower than you currently have it. I know it's a weird jump from the chord on beat 3 but that's what I hear as the more prominent note (you could leave out the F for playability if you want). I also hear a D on beat 4, you could include that instead of the F there if you wanted. Also shouldn't the chord symbol here be something more like Fm/Bb or Bb7sus2?

--- End quote ---
After talking about it a bit, I think this is what's going on in there
Spoiler[close]I was focusing mainly on the high synth and chime parts for the melody, so I think that using a low Bb is a bit distracting with a random register change. I left the Bb where it was moved up an octave, and took the last F off of beat 4 to make transitioning to the next chord a little easier


--- Quote from: Radiak488417 on October 31, 2021, 03:48:59 AM ----For m23, you have the chord labeled as a Bb9sus in the sheet, and Static listed it as a Bb9sus4, but the 4th isn't actually there—it's a 7sus2 chord. Whenever I see "9sus" or "13sus", I usually infer that it's a sus4, but in this case since it's a sus2 which is a bit more uncommon I think just calling it an Fm/Bb might be better. I'm no expert on this though, so let me know if I'm wrong.

--- End quote ---
So we talked about this for a bit and it seems like Bb7sus2 is a better representation of the movement from V to I, but chords are very hard so if anyone else can present a case one way or the other I'd love to learn lol

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