[DELETED] [WiiU] Xenoblade Chronicles X - "MNN+@0・ (Ma-non Ship (Day))" by JZ

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Xeno
Game: Xenoblade Chronicles X
Console: Wii U
Title: MNN+@0・ (Ma-non Ship (Day))
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: JZ

[MomoQca]

Here's a more upbeat song in contrast to all of my previously submitted sheets. Pizza and aliens galore!

A few things to note:
-How do I make D.S. work in playback? It's supposed to go back to measure one (which, unlike area themes from the other Xenoblade games, doesn't actually have loops with smooth transitions. All of the area themes in XCX just goes back to the very beginning). I'm not sure if D.S. is the appropriate type of repeat.

-Should I make the space between measures bigger, particularly m.7 through 12? The RH and LH are kinda close to each other.

-Is there a way to move the treble clef to the right in m.24 & 26? It kinda runs close to/clashes with the arpeggiated chord lines.

[Fantastic Ike]

Why do Xenoblade tracks have such weird names lol

How do I make D.S. work in playback? It's supposed to go back to measure one (which, unlike area themes from the other Xenoblade games, doesn't actually have loops with smooth transitions. All of the area themes in XCX just goes back to the very beginning). I'm not sure if D.S. is the appropriate type of repeat.

Okay. So to answer your question. D.C. al fine seems more appropriate since it just starts from the beginning, or at least that's what you told us. Now if you go to the Repeat Tool on Finale and click on the D.S. (or D.C. al fine in this case) you  can choose a measure number to target, 1 will do just fine and that should be good with playback.

Should I make the space between measures bigger, particularly m.7 through 12? The RH and LH are kinda close to each other.

Yeah it probably wouldn't hurt. Might be good to move those rests on the top down a little as well.

Is there a way to move the treble clef to the right in m.24 & 26? It kinda runs close to/clashes with the arpeggiated chord lines.

Yes, just click on the Clef Tool and select it, you should be able to move it then.

Now I did notice a couple other things you might wanna change:

m25-28: Double check that these are straight sixteenth notes and not sixteenth note triplets. I didn't review this piece for note accuracy but the run sounded faster than just straight sixteenths.
m29-30: It'd be best to break the beaming of this so that the triplets and straight sixteenths are separate. It'd really help readability.
m31-32: Pretty sure there's some sort of bassline to be put here.
m33: I'm not hearing these octave jumps at all. I'm assuming this is meant to represent the percussion fill? I'd suggest either notating rhythm with crosshead notes or just taking this out entirely.
m42: Might wanna increase the measure spacing. That mf dynamic is rubbing up against those sixteenths.
m43-44: Note spacing/clef spacing could help here too.


But dope track, hope this tides you over until someone can critique the meat of your arrangment!

[Libera]

Why do Xenoblade tracks have such weird names lol

It's not Xenoblade, it's just Hiroyuki Sawano.

[MomoQca]

Thanks for the feedback, Fantastic Ike!

Why do Xenoblade tracks have such weird names lol

Because Sawano. Lol. To answer your question, it's because Sawano wants his titles to stand out and be unique.

Everything should be addressed, except for the distance between systems. I tried increasing the distance to 1.2", but the last few measures keep disappearing. The increased space pushes the last few measures onto a new page, but the last page isn't visible. How do I fix this?

[Fantastic Ike]

Everything should be addressed, except for the distance between systems. I tried increasing the distance to 1.2", but the last few measures keep disappearing. The increased space pushes the last few measures onto a new page, but the last page isn't visible. How do I fix this?

Hmm, I'm not sure on this personally. Maybe someone can help when they offer more feedback.

[Bloop]

Everything should be addressed, except for the distance between systems. I tried increasing the distance to 1.2", but the last few measures keep disappearing. The increased space pushes the last few measures onto a new page, but the last page isn't visible. How do I fix this?

Usually this should fix itself after some scrolling or after pressing Ctrl+U I think (which is the shortcut for "Update Layout"). I think the distance between the staves looks good throughout, but you can move the first system (and therefore all systems) of page 4, 5 and 6 down a bit, since it's very close to the header but there's a lot of space left below.

Anyway, onto my comments:
-There's some weird stuff happening with most of your staccato placement: it seems you're using the staccato articulations for guitar tablature, but those don't work the same like normal staccatos (in tablature, the articulations have fixed positions above the staff, but in sheet music it should be close to the notehead side, or above the stems if you're using layers). You'll probably have to delete and re-enter those correctly.
-m2 and m10: The dotted quarter rest should be written as a quarter rest + 8th rest (only dotted rests smaller than the beat are allowed to be dotted).
-m4: The tie just before the first note in the R.H. should be flipped downwards.
-m5-8: The 16th rest on beat 4 in the L.H. should be one step down (so the circles are in the stave spaces instead on the stave lines). Same for m34-37 later on.
-m13: I hear a D in the R.H. on beat 4.5 (instead of F)
-m14: I hear a D in the R.H. on beat 2.5 (instead of C)
-m15: I hear an F in the R.H. on beat 3.25 (instead of a D)
-m16: From beat 2 on, I hear D - F - D - C - D (instead of C - C - Bb - G - Bb)
-m21-23: On beats 1-2 in these bars, I have a hard time hearing those 8th notes in the R.H.: the synth lead pick up I can hear is this in every bar.
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-m24: I also hear something else in the R.H. here:
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-m25-28: I think these harp runs end on a D just before beat 2, not C. Also, I don't know where these L.H. chords came from, as there's not too much going on beside the harp runs. There's a clear woodwind line though, as well as just the single Eb and D on the bottom of the chords on beat 1 of m25 and 26. It might be easier to give these two voices to the L.H. instead of the chords.
In m27, I don't hear the L.H. percussion hit on beat 1. Also, for this percussion octave notes, maybe a G would work better harmonically? The A is clashing quite a lot with the melody in m29-30.
-m29: In the L.H., I don't hear percussion hits on beats 3.75 and 4.5.
-m29-32: I hear this R.H. differently, both melodically and rhythmically:

Spoiler

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[close]

-m31-32: I believe the percussion L.H. is doing something more syncopated than this, but maybe it's better in general to just leave it out? It makes these bars a lot busier than it needs to be.
-m33: These triplet figures start an 8th note later (so on beat 2 instead of beat 1.5). For the one on beat 4, you could just keep it as 8th note, since the jump from triplet 16th down to the dyad on beat 4.5 will be too large and too fast.

I'll get to the other half some other time!

[MomoQca]

Hi! Just wanted to say that I'm unable to make any adjustments until the very end of this month. I hope that's alright with you.

[MomoQca]

Everything has been addressed, with a few exceptions listed below. Thank you, Bloop!

-m4: The tie just before the first note in the R.H. should be flipped downwards.

How do I do this? I know I can flip the stem direction for notes, but it doesn't appear to affect this particular tie.

-m33: These triplet figures start an 8th note later (so on beat 2 instead of beat 1.5).

I think I still hear it at beat 1.5.

[Bloop]

Awesome! This one is still there though:

-m5-8: The 16th rest on beat 4 in the L.H. should be one step down (so the circles are in the stave spaces instead on the stave lines). Same for m34-37 later on.

How do I do this? I know I can flip the stem direction for notes, but it doesn't appear to affect this particular tie.

You can use the Tie Tool You cannot view this attachment. (in Special Tools) for that: click on measure 4, click on a box of the tie that needs to be flipped, and press Ctrl+F.

I think I still hear it at beat 1.5.

I'm very certain it's not though, try tapping along with the beat from a few bars before, you should end up hearing the triplets start on the tap instead of end on the tap.

Here's feedback for the rest of the piece:
-m38 and 40: In the R.H. on beat 1.75, I hear a D an octave lower, but it doesn't tie over into beat 2: that should stay as its current D.
-m44: I hear the Bb on beat 2.75 an octave lower.
-m45: I hear an Eb on beat 4.25 (instead of an A). Also, I don't hear the top voice you've added here, was that a sort of percussion imitation or so? If you decide on deleting it, you can try and put the other voice in the right octaves again, as they're now a bit skewed to make place for that other voice.
-m46-49: You moved the melody in the L.H. down an octave mostly (m46-48 from beat 2 to beat 4, in m49 from beat 1 to the end of beat 3), but there's enough room for it to stay in its original octave.
-m50: I think it's safe to say this part has modulated to Eb major here (3 flats)
-m50-73: I see you've arranged a different accompaniment here, but it might make more sense to do something more akin to the original bassline. It doesn't have to be exactly that, but some hybrid between the bass and drum part probably makes for a groove closer to the original. Here's an example for m58-59:
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-m53 and 61: On beat 2, I hear the Bb octave an octave up, and hear Bb and D as grace notes.
-m59 and 61: It's probably best to flip the slur of the grace notes before beat 2, as it's currently clashing with the big slurs starting a few measures earlier.
-m74-77: I hear the R.H. here a bit differently:
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Also, it's better to have the diminuendo follow the mf dynamic marking, instead of starting below the dynamic marking. Lastly, you can leave out the "al Fine" part of the D.C., since that's only used when the end (Fine) of the piece is somewhere else in the piece.
I checked some in-game footage to listen to how the piece repeats (i couldn't find an extended version of this song), but apparently there's also a one bar rest before it goes back to the beginning.

[MomoQca]

Closing this and resubmitting for the Space Travel Project here.