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[LeviR.star]

390th

[3DS] Kirby's Extra Epic Yarn - "Devilish Mode"

"Devilish Mode" is how I have it titled currently, but I could easily be talked into renaming it to "Devil's Theme".

[Libera]

This is too much.  You can have the one 3-page sheet or the two short ones, not both.  The 3-page sheet is a perfectly good length for a single submission, whereas the other two sheets are short, and so we would allow both of them.

I hope that clears it up for you.

[LeviR.star]

This is too much.  You can have the one 3-page sheet or the two short ones, not both.  The 3-page sheet is a perfectly good length for a single submission, whereas the other two sheets are short, and so we would allow both of them.

I hope that clears it up for you.

Understood. I'll delete the two shorter ones.

[cacabish]

I really, really like this piece. It's got this carnival-istic (is that a word?) vibe to it and I love the playfulness of it. Much spook.

Some light feedback from me:

• m.1-2 (and other analogous places) - I'm not really hearing the fp to mf crescendos you put in there. It all kinda sounds the same dynamic to me. Or if there is a build-up, it's very subtle, certainly not what I would describe as crescendo-ing from p to mf. Still, I do like this kinda dramatic buildup from a playing perspective, though, I'm just not sure if it's fully appropriate/accurate.
• m.3-4 (and other analogous places) RH - It sounds like the Bb ties into the proceeding A, so, I would maybe add tenuto on the Bb or add a slur from the Bb to the A. I think that would give it this very satisfying hold-and-release with the staccato.
• m.14 (and other analogous places) RH - I don't think that the G# and A (beat 2) are necessarily both staccato. To me, it sounds like the G# slurs into the A and the A is staccato, though it could also be that both of them are legato leading to the B, not quite sure. Also, it sounds like the beat 1 A has a lift to it, so maybe make it an eighth note or something?
• m.15-16 (and other analogous places) RH - I would maybe replace the beat 1 D#-G dyad with a Eb-G dyad to keep the major 3rd intervals parallel across the ups-and-down. That said, what you have is quite legible, so I don't know if this necessitates changing.
• m.18 (and other analogous places) RH - It sounds to me that beats 1 and 1.5 are slurred (as you have it), beats 2 and 2.5 are slurred similarly (with staccato only on beat 2.5), and beat 3 is not staccato at all.

That's it from me for now. Very nice work on this one!

[LeviR.star]

• m.1-2 (and other analogous places) - I'm not really hearing the fp to mf crescendos you put in there. It all kinda sounds the same dynamic to me. Or if there is a build-up, it's very subtle, certainly not what I would describe as crescendo-ing from p to mf. Still, I do like this kinda dramatic buildup from a playing perspective, though, I'm just not sure if it's fully appropriate/accurate.
• m.3-4 (and other analogous places) RH - It sounds like the Bb ties into the proceeding A, so, I would maybe add tenuto on the Bb or add a slur from the Bb to the A. I think that would give it this very satisfying hold-and-release with the staccato.
• m.14 (and other analogous places) RH - I don't think that the G# and A (beat 2) are necessarily both staccato. To me, it sounds like the G# slurs into the A and the A is staccato, though it could also be that both of them are legato leading to the B, not quite sure. Also, it sounds like the beat 1 A has a lift to it, so maybe make it an eighth note or something?
• m.15-16 (and other analogous places) RH - I would maybe replace the beat 1 D#-G dyad with a Eb-G dyad to keep the major 3rd intervals parallel across the ups-and-down. That said, what you have is quite legible, so I don't know if this necessitates changing.
• m.18 (and other analogous places) RH - It sounds to me that beats 1 and 1.5 are slurred (as you have it), beats 2 and 2.5 are slurred similarly (with staccato only on beat 2.5), and beat 3 is not staccato at all.

- Personally, I don't agree; there's definitely a dynamic build-up in the music (mainly the percussion), and while it may not be audible in the piano part like you're implying, I felt reducing the piece down to a piano solo necessitated it, so that the music can still be just as expressive
- when you used the word "ties" I was confused, but now I see where you're coming from. I'll add some slurs!
- you're right, that first eighth note is definitely tied into the next. Though, I don't agree with the quarter note having a release, so I'll keep that the same
- you know, I was unsure of that spot myself. But now that I've got your opinion, I'm comfortable with creating an extra accidental (the E-natural) in the measure, as a result of the E-flat
- you're right, and I think the fifth note of those two bars is sustained through the rest of the measure, too. Made those edits

Thanks for the feedback, cacabish! It's much appreciated.

[Bloop]

i like creepy kirby stuff

-m3 and 7 (and similar places): With the newly added slurs, maybe you could slur beat 1 to beat 2 here too? They are just as connected as beat 3 to beat 4.
-m6: Maybe you could add the C-Bb motion in beat 1.5-2 as an (optional) second layer in the R.H.? It's a bit stretchy but still reachable for me at least.
-m11-12, 15-16: You could also write the Gn's here as Fx's (and then the Eb's back to D#'s), since it functions as a #2 to the major third in the chord.
-m20-21: The (electric) bass plays the L.H. part an octave below as well, which happens in m1-2 after the repeat too. Up to you if you wanna incorporate that or not ^^
-m22: The forte dynamic marking is a bit off-center
-m25: I think you can add in the extra two voices underneath beat 1.5 in the R.H.: the player will still only be able to play the E-F legato, but that's enough to make it sound like the whole thing is legato.
-m30-37: The same comment from the above applies to this section as well, most of these note can convincingly be played legato. Only m37 is a little bit harder because of the Fn on beat 1.5 and 2.5, you could decide to leave that out.

[LeviR.star]

-m3 and 7 (and similar places): With the newly added slurs, maybe you could slur beat 1 to beat 2 here too? They are just as connected as beat 3 to beat 4.
-m6: Maybe you could add the C-Bb motion in beat 1.5-2 as an (optional) second layer in the R.H.? It's a bit stretchy but still reachable for me at least.
-m11-12, 15-16: You could also write the Gn's here as Fx's (and then the Eb's back to D#'s), since it functions as a #2 to the major third in the chord.
-m20-21: The (electric) bass plays the L.H. part an octave below as well, which happens in m1-2 after the repeat too. Up to you if you wanna incorporate that or not ^^
-m22: The forte dynamic marking is a bit off-center
-m25: I think you can add in the extra two voices underneath beat 1.5 in the R.H.: the player will still only be able to play the E-F legato, but that's enough to make it sound like the whole thing is legato.
-m30-37: The same comment from the above applies to this section as well, most of these note can convincingly be played legato. Only m37 is a little bit harder because of the Fn on beat 1.5 and 2.5, you could decide to leave that out.

- you know, after putting some more thought into it, I've decided not to connect slurs from the quarter notes. As much as I appreciate your knack for consistency, Bloop, I no longer feel it's necessary for me to dictate every single hold/release, and all those slurs end up making the sheet look awfully cluttered, in my opinion. Removing the ones from earlier
- personally, I don't think that part is important enough to be worth including, but thank you anyway for mentioning it
- good point, I'll change those accidentals, as well as the similar ones in the second half. I didn't miss any, right?
- that's a good idea, it'll give it a little more punch compared to m. 1 - 2
- I didn't think it'd fit earlier, but after messing with it, I've now got it nestled right under beat 1 of the RH
- all the voices were there in the original draft, but I had my doubts on whether or not they could be managed. Glad to see someone can!
- ^^ see above. I'll restore the voices, and leave the one in m. 37 alone; if the performer can't manage it, they can omit the problem note

Thank you for checking this! The Dropbox file should be updated to reflect the changes.

[Bloop]

and all those slurs end up making the sheet look awfully cluttered, in my opinion.

awwww i like slurs haha, but I tend to overuse them myself sometimes anyway :p No slurs is alright too!

Either way, I'll approve!

[Static]

Delightfully devilish, Levi

• m19 RH: It sounds like there's a minor 2nd voice in here (G#-D-G#), but it's probably fine to leave out.
• m20 LH beat 4.5 should be a Bb in both octaves
• m33 RH beat 1 is staccato

[LeviR.star]

Delightfully devilish, Levi

Thanks, Static; I really went ham on this one.

• m19 RH: It sounds like there's a minor 2nd voice in here (G#-D-G#), but it's probably fine to leave out.
• m20 LH beat 4.5 should be a Bb in both octaves
• m33 RH beat 1 is staccato

- you're right, there's a minor 2nd dissonance in there somewhere. I'm just not sure it's in the right register to justify its inclusion here
- oops, thanks for catching that. Silly me, I forgot how to write octaves...
- so it is—I'll add that straight away. I'll also add one to the same note in m. 14, which, as it turns out, is staccato as well

Thanks for the feedback, the file is updated.

[Static]

Looks good, therefore I will be localizing this sheet entirely within the accepted folder.