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[SW] Animal Crossing: New Horizons - "Group Stretching" by cacabish

Started by Zeta, January 12, 2023, 06:09:38 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Animal Crossing
Game: Animal Crossing: New Horizons
Console: Nintendo Switch
Title: Group Stretching
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: cacabish

[attachment deleted by admin]

cacabish


A couple notes:
  • I originally had breath marks after some of the "verses", but I removed them due to be inconsistent. Let me know if you think breath marks would be a good addition or not and where.
  • I'm not sure about key signatures for m.13-24. I've stuck with a single shift to G major, which m.17-20 definitely is and m.16 resolves to, but I'm not sure if it's prudent to make a switch for both m.13-16 (not sure what key; some kind of pentatonic scale perhaps? Do let me know!) and m.21-24 (A minor) too.
  • m.37-39 have the LH lift on beats 2.5 & 4.5. This is there, but I wonder if it may be better to notate it as quarter notes, rather than eighth notes. Let me know what you think!

And yes, I do apologize for the instructor's nattering -- I have never found a version without it. :(

XiaoMigros

To adress your notes:
  • I think it's clear enough with the double barlines alone. Besides, anyone playing this will probably be aware of how it fits together in the game.
  • The key signature as you have it is fine, even though the track does dance it around a little. It dips into some C-centric stuff in the first half, but the second half is made up of 2 I-IV-V-I patterns, so all in all the cadence is definitely centered around a tonic of G major.
  • m37-39 looks great like that! If you want you could add slurs to each fourth-eighth pattern but I think it's clear what the arranger's intent here is.

And now for my own notes:
  • Slurring: I think the slurs you have are great, and help show the performer how to structure their playing. That said, I think the first page in particular is a little sparse, so looking over it would be appreciated.
  • m4 & m40: I think one continuous roll on beat 3 would more accurately reflect the original
  • m5-12: The LH pattern sounds like it does in m37-39, with beats 2 and 4 not sustained as long as 1 and 3. Changing note lengths and/or adding slurs would help make this distinction.
  • m18 b4: The D in the LH chord is an octave lower
  • Same thing with m20, I think the B might also be lowered here
  • m21-24: I feel like the LH could use some more slurs. In the RH, I would recommend writing the staccato dotted eighth notes as just regular eighth notes (no staccato). Additionally, I think beaming over the resulting and already existing 16th rests would look neat.
  • Beat 1 in the LH of m21-23 is missing a C just above the A.
  • Beat 1 in the RH of m25, 27 & 29 is missing an F just below the A.
  • I think the C on beat 2 of m28 is an octave lower.
  • m32: It might be worth either moving the C in beat 2 to the LH, or copying it over and adding parentheses.
  • m39 beat 3: I don't hear the G in the RH.
  • the rit. markings and similar are best written above the staves.

Does the copyright have 2 years in it because this track was released in a later update? I'm not that familiar with New Horizons lore :p

cacabish

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AMTo adress your notes:
  • I think it's clear enough with the double barlines alone. Besides, anyone playing this will probably be aware of how it fits together in the game.
  • The key signature as you have it is fine, even though the track does dance it around a little. It dips into some C-centric stuff in the first half, but the second half is made up of 2 I-IV-V-I patterns, so all in all the cadence is definitely centered around a tonic of G major.
  • m37-39 looks great like that! If you want you could add slurs to each fourth-eighth pattern but I think it's clear what the arranger's intent here is.
Sounds good. Thanks! :)

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • Slurring: I think the slurs you have are great, and help show the performer how to structure their playing. That said, I think the first page in particular is a little sparse, so looking over it would be appreciated.
Fair enough. I've added some more slurs. I haven't added any to m.5-12 mostly because, according to what Libera said to me once (which I may be misusing here), slurs are best when they show contrast. Since the phrasing for m.5-12 is the natural phrasing and there aren't any additional articulations, I feel that adding slurs here wouldn't do anything to contrast. But, I reserve the right to be wrong here.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m4 & m40: I think one continuous roll on beat 3 would more accurately reflect the original
Nuuuuuu don't make me do it... :'(
Unfortunately, I agree and I've added it, I just wish it wasn't such a hassle to do in Finale/MuseScore sometimes...

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m5-12: The LH pattern sounds like it does in m37-39, with beats 2 and 4 not sustained as long as 1 and 3. Changing note lengths and/or adding slurs would help make this distinction.
Yeah, this was related to my 3rd point and I originally had it as such, but I wasn't sure, so I just changed it back because it's cleaner. Given that m.37-39 looks good to you, then m.5-12 are fine too.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m18 b4: The D in the LH chord is an octave lower
  • Same thing with m20, I think the B might also be lowered here
Good catch! In fact, I think the m.20 b.4 G major chord was an entire octave lower, not just the B & D.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m21-24: I feel like the LH could use some more slurs. In the RH, I would recommend writing the staccato dotted eighth notes as just regular eighth notes (no staccato). Additionally, I think beaming over the resulting and already existing 16th rests would look neat.
I forget about beaming over rests. I agree, this looks nice!

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • Beat 1 in the LH of m21-23 is missing a C just above the A.
  • Beat 1 in the RH of m25, 27 & 29 is missing an F just below the A.
Yep, you're right! I've added those.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • I think the C on beat 2 of m28 is an octave lower.
I disagree. When I slow it down and raise the pitch an octave, I can clearly hear an ascending C major chord: E-G-C.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m32: It might be worth either moving the C in beat 2 to the LH, or copying it over and adding parentheses.
Yeah, I felt that was awkward, especially contrasting the parallel structure of measure 28, so this is a good fix!

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • m39 beat 3: I don't hear the G in the RH.
I do and I remember spending quite a while on this. It's really subtle, but even now when I slow it down, I can clearly hear a F-G resolution across beats 2.5-3 and that G doesn't come from anywhere else, so I'm pretty sure it's not a harmonic or from a sustain. It may be too subtle to care, but I'm pretty sure it's there.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
  • the rit. markings and similar are best written above the staves.
Yep. Something I've learned through this that I didn't know prior!

Quote from: XiaoMigros on January 13, 2023, 04:24:57 AM
    Does the copyright have 2 years in it because this track was released in a later update? I'm not that familiar with New Horizons lore :p
Correct. Animal Crossing: New Horizons was released in March 2020, just a couple weeks after the pandemic quarantines started (which I couldn't have been more happy to have during that rough time :) ). However, the game received several major patches to add lots of additional content throughout 2020 and 2021. This song (and the corresponding activity) was added in the last major patch, v2.0, in November 2021. [SOURCE]

---
Alright, that was quite a bit, but I really, really appreciate all the feedback, Xiao! Files have been updated accordingly. :)

XiaoMigros

Quote from: cacabish on January 16, 2023, 03:27:15 PMI haven't added any to m.5-12 mostly because, according to what Libera said to me once (which I may be misusing here), slurs are best when they show contrast.
I agree, they would be a little superfluous here.

Quote from: cacabish on January 16, 2023, 03:27:15 PMGood catch! In fact, I think the m.20 b.4 G major chord was an entire octave lower, not just the B & D.
Going over this again and I think I agree! I'm actually not sure if I hear a G at all here now, it might just be reverb from beat 3 (and leaving it in makes the texture a bit muddier). I think it's faintly being played so leaving it in should be good (at least, until someone else corrects it!)

Quote from: cacabish on January 16, 2023, 03:27:15 PMI disagree. When I slow it down and raise the pitch an octave, I can clearly hear an ascending C major chord: E-G-C.
I think you're right, there's just something about the note's timbre that makes it sound like it's an octave lower if I listen too closely. It's definitely correct how you have it though..

Quote from: cacabish on January 16, 2023, 03:27:15 PMI do and I remember spending quite a while on this. It's really subtle, but even now when I slow it down, I can clearly hear a F-G resolution across beats 2.5-3 and that G doesn't come from anywhere else, so I'm pretty sure it's not a harmonic or from a sustain. It may be too subtle to care, but I'm pretty sure it's there.
I hear it too now and it is indeed really subtle. Do you think it's worth pointing that out to the performer?

Quote from: cacabish on January 16, 2023, 03:27:15 PMCorrect. Animal Crossing: New Horizons was released in March 2020, just a couple weeks after the pandemic quarantines started (which I couldn't have been more happy to have during that rough time :) ). However, the game received several major patches to add lots of additional content throughout 2020 and 2021. This song (and the corresponding activity) was added in the last major patch, v2.0, in November 2021. [SOURCE]
Awesome! Thanks so much :)

Bloop

About the key signatures, m13-16 is definitely a bit weird. The chords all seem to function like a piece in C major, but it never really fully gets there. If it was a part taken out of another piece it'd probably have been C major, but in this case I think G major works fine too. However, for m21-24, this is a lot more clearly in A minor, so you could change the key signature here. It won't affect the readability much to have another key signature change (especially to one that has no accidentals).

-m17 and 19: Maybe mp might work better as a dynamic marking instead of mf in these two bars? Especially the accompaniment sounds a bit quieter than mf compared to the f in m18 and 20.
-m18 and 20: I think you can change these pedal markings to two lines of two beats (instead of one line for the whole measure). A player might interpret as having to press the pedal for the whole bar, since it's currently specifically notated that way.
-m22 and 24: I hear a C above the L.H. A in beat 1 here too, like in m21.
-m28: The pedal mark here should be extended for one more beat. You can change the C in the L.H. beat 2 to a half note too then, so it's a bit more clear where the pedal line stops.
-m32: I think you can change the L.H. C in beat 2 to a dotted half note: leaving a rest after notes might suggest the note needs to be dampened, even though there's a pedal mark that says it shouldn't.

cacabish

Quote from: Bloop on January 28, 2023, 08:20:43 AMAbout the key signatures, m13-16 is definitely a bit weird. The chords all seem to function like a piece in C major, but it never really fully gets there. If it was a part taken out of another piece it'd probably have been C major, but in this case I think G major works fine too. However, for m21-24, this is a lot more clearly in A minor, so you could change the key signature here. It won't affect the readability much to have another key signature change (especially to one that has no accidentals).
Fair enough. I've changed m.21-24 to A minor.  I could change m.13-16 to C major, but I'd prefer minimizing the number of key changes as much as possible.

Quote from: Bloop on January 28, 2023, 08:20:43 AM-m17 and 19: Maybe mp might work better as a dynamic marking instead of mf in these two bars? Especially the accompaniment sounds a bit quieter than mf compared to the f in m18 and 20.
Yeeeaaaah, I'm not very good with dynamics yet and I think you've got a good point here. Changed!

Quote from: Bloop on January 28, 2023, 08:20:43 AM-m18 and 20: I think you can change these pedal markings to two lines of two beats (instead of one line for the whole measure). A player might interpret as having to press the pedal for the whole bar, since it's currently specifically notated that way.
Good point. I had always thought of it that way, but I guess I didn't think about writing it that way too.

Quote from: Bloop on January 28, 2023, 08:20:43 AM-m22 and 24: I hear a C above the L.H. A in beat 1 here too, like in m21.
Oops -- this one slipped by me when I did Xiao's fixes. Fixed! However, did you also mean to include m.24? I don't hear anything extra and a C would certainly not work for beat 1.

Quote from: Bloop on January 28, 2023, 08:20:43 AM-m28: The pedal mark here should be extended for one more beat. You can change the C in the L.H. beat 2 to a half note too then, so it's a bit more clear where the pedal line stops.
-m32: I think you can change the L.H. C in beat 2 to a dotted half note: leaving a rest after notes might suggest the note needs to be dampened, even though there's a pedal mark that says it shouldn't.
Yeah! This looks a lot cleaner and flows a lot better. Me likey! :D

---
Alright, that should be everything addressed and the files have been updated. Thanks, Bloop! :)

Bloop

Quote from: cacabish on January 28, 2023, 12:33:39 PMHowever, did you also mean to include m.24? I don't hear anything extra and a C would certainly not work for beat 1.
Oh oops, I think I might've meant m23, but it's there now ^^ I'll approve!
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Libera

This looks great.  The only thing I noticed is in bar 20.  I'm not sure I hear the low G rearticulated on beat 4.  It just sounds like the B-D there and the G held over with the pedal.  I think it sounds a bit too heavy with the G as well compared to the original.

Otherwise, will happily accept!

cacabish

Quote from: Libera on February 25, 2023, 01:13:26 PMThis looks great.  The only thing I noticed is in bar 20.  I'm not sure I hear the low G rearticulated on beat 4.  It just sounds like the B-D there and the G held over with the pedal.  I think it sounds a bit too heavy with the G as well compared to the original.
Agreed. The triad definitely feels very heavy, so I think you're right with the B-D dyad.

Thanks, Libera! Files have been updated!

Libera


Zeta

This submission has been accepted by Libera.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot