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Author Topic: Jokes  (Read 35593 times)

FireArrow

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #480 on: August 23, 2018, 01:22:38 AM »

The furry community is also a good place to find subs

I feel youre obligated to attend funeral since you're responsible for my death.
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straight from the department of redundancy department

Splatoon Inkling

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #481 on: September 07, 2018, 10:24:57 PM »

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?







Because he didn't have the guts to do it!
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BlackDragonSlayer

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #482 on: October 21, 2018, 06:35:22 AM »

https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/9pwmjg/why_was_yoda_afraid_of_7/

this one is pretty bad

idk why i'm even posting it
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And the moral of the story: Quit while you're a head.

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Splatoon Inkling

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #483 on: October 31, 2018, 04:19:09 AM »

Groan.... actually I am a star wars fan.
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mikey

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #484 on: October 31, 2018, 04:32:15 AM »

That Reddit immediately devolved into people quoting gamegrumps which doesn't do much for my general opinion of the star wars fanbase
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BlackDragonSlayer

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #485 on: October 31, 2018, 04:34:46 AM »

are you just saying you don't like the fanbase

or are you implying you're too good for star wars
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SlowPokemon

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #486 on: October 31, 2018, 05:31:25 AM »

Two things can be true
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Fuck logic, that shit is boring, lame and does not always support my opinions.

mikey

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #487 on: November 01, 2018, 04:53:21 AM »

I'm saying I don't like gamegrumps

Edit: I'd be remiss to ignore slows one-liner
Plus 1 to slow
« Last Edit: November 01, 2018, 04:55:42 AM by mikey »
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Luke 1:3

"It seemed good to me also, having had perfect understanding of all things from the very first, to write unto thee..."

Splatoon Inkling

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #488 on: February 01, 2019, 11:41:16 PM »

Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? They were Prime mates.





Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator says, "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence; then a gun shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says, "OK, now what?
« Last Edit: February 21, 2019, 05:39:33 PM by Splatoon Inkling »
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Bobbythekid21

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #489 on: February 26, 2019, 05:22:55 PM »

A pastor was walking around a neighborhood knocking on peoples doors and handing out church cards.
He can to this one house and knocked. No one answered...
He knocked again. No one answered...
The pastor took out a church card and wrote:
Quote from: Card
Revelation 3:20
Which, in the Bible, reads:
Quote from: Bible
Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.
So he slipped it in the crack between the door and the doorframe and left.

The next Sunday the pastor was counting the offerings and saw the same card he had put in that mans door.
This was written on the back:
Quote from: Card
Genesis 3:10
Which, in the Bible, reads:
Quote from: Me
I dare you to go look up Genesis 3:10 yourself.
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BlackDragonSlayer

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #490 on: February 26, 2019, 11:32:39 PM »

I chuckled a bit.
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Bobbythekid21

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #491 on: February 27, 2019, 12:48:37 AM »

My boss told this in church Sunday. He also told us to look up the punchline ourselves. It was funny watching people try to keep quiet and not laugh out loud as they looked it up during church.
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333,331 is a prime number.
Spoiler
Well, I'll just stick around for now and be helpful.
I'm gonna hold myself to it by constantly reminding myself of it.
[close]

Splatoon Inkling

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #492 on: February 27, 2019, 01:30:31 AM »

That's actually pretty funny! Wait, you have a boss?
« Last Edit: February 27, 2019, 03:08:13 PM by Splatoon Inkling »
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Bobbythekid21

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #493 on: February 27, 2019, 01:37:48 AM »

That's actually pretty funny! Wait, you have a boss?
Yes, he's an entrepreneur/mechanic.
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333,331 is a prime number.
Spoiler
Well, I'll just stick around for now and be helpful.
I'm gonna hold myself to it by constantly reminding myself of it.
[close]

Splatoon Inkling

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Re: Jokes
« Reply #494 on: February 27, 2019, 05:21:13 AM »

Tonight's sermon - "What is hell?"; Come early and listen to our choir practice.
« Last Edit: February 27, 2019, 03:08:34 PM by Splatoon Inkling »
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