[GCN] Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door - "Luigi's Story" (Replacement) by mariolegofan

Started by Zeta, May 13, 2015, 12:30:31 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Super Mario
Game: Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door
Console: Nintendo GameCube
Title: Luigi's Story
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: mariolegofan


Replacement Information:

Links to Existing Sheet: MUS | MIDI | PDF
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)

[attachment deleted by admin]

Sebastian




Bespinben

Good arrangement. Just a few more of these and maybe we'll have enough for an update.

*I don't mean this in any way to demean, but I feel like I keep saying the same stuff over and over when I review your sheets MLF, particularly with regards to overall formatting. Examples here:
(1) the composer/arranger info nearly touching toes against the notes of the first system, but yet there is a whole chunk of unused whitespace at the bottom that is available for you to use to free up the top?
(2) The site URL is extremely close to the edge of the page (again, you have a ton of whitespace in which you could move it up some)-- you don't use tiny 0.2 inch margins on your English MLA-style essay, so I would think that would apply here as well, at least in a loose sense.
(3) While not a problem, the measure distribution just seems really inconsistent. I just don't see any good reason why m. 39-47 are 8-in-a-system, while m. 53-56 are fitted 4-in-a-system. It would make sense if say there were a ton of 16th or 32nd notes in a section, which would mean you'd have to give it more space, but these two systems are nearly equal in terms of the space they require.

I admit, these are honestly rather unimportant details, but I'd like to help you make it habit to check for these sort of things, that way I don't have to keep blowing my airhorn about it.

On the upside, I commend you for noticing the change in tonality m. 17-40. At first glance I thought it was an unnecessary key change, but I realized you were correct shortly afterwards.

Quote from: Nebbles on July 04, 2015, 12:05:12 PM
Someone beat Bespinben to making PMD music?! GASP!

MLF for Chatroom Mod next Tuesday

Sebastian

Quote from: Bespinben on June 06, 2015, 07:24:23 PM*I don't mean this in any way to demean, but I feel like I keep saying the same stuff over and over when I review your sheets MLF, particularly with regards to overall formatting. Examples here:
(1) the composer/arranger info nearly touching toes against the notes of the first system, but yet there is a whole chunk of unused whitespace at the bottom that is available for you to use to free up the top?
(2) The site URL is extremely close to the edge of the page (again, you have a ton of whitespace in which you could move it up some)-- you don't use tiny 0.2 inch margins on your English MLA-style essay, so I would think that would apply here as well, at least in a loose sense.
(3) While not a problem, the measure distribution just seems really inconsistent. I just don't see any good reason why m. 39-47 are 8-in-a-system, while m. 53-56 are fitted 4-in-a-system. It would make sense if say there were a ton of 16th or 32nd notes in a section, which would mean you'd have to give it more space, but these two systems are nearly equal in terms of the space they require.
Sorry about that.....I guess I've been focusing mostly on my musical problems and theory problems and have been throwing the formatting out the window :p
Sorry for forgetting that again. Ill get that ASAP :)

Quote from: Bespinben on June 06, 2015, 07:24:23 PMOn the upside, I commend you for noticing the change in tonality m. 17-40. At first glance I thought it was an unnecessary key change, but I realized you were correct shortly afterwards.
Thanks! I actually didn't include the key change.....at first......but noticed it when I was finished that there was actually a key change haha.



Sebastian

Quote from: Bespinben on June 06, 2015, 07:24:23 PM(1) the composer/arranger info nearly touching toes against the notes of the first system, but yet there is a whole chunk of unused whitespace at the bottom that is available for you to use to free up the top?
(2) The site URL is extremely close to the edge of the page (again, you have a ton of whitespace in which you could move it up some)-- you don't use tiny 0.2 inch margins on your English MLA-style essay, so I would think that would apply here as well, at least in a loose sense.
(3) While not a problem, the measure distribution just seems really inconsistent. I just don't see any good reason why m. 39-47 are 8-in-a-system, while m. 53-56 are fitted 4-in-a-system. It would make sense if say there were a ton of 16th or 32nd notes in a section, which would mean you'd have to give it more space, but these two systems are nearly equal in terms of the space they require.
All fixed and links in Op are updated!
I'm happy I didn't get anything musically wrong.....glad I'm improving :)
My formatting needs work though :P



Zeta