[NES] Dr. Mario - "Fever" (Replacement) by ThatHiddenCharacter

Started by Zeta, November 02, 2017, 07:39:06 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Super Mario
Game: Dr. Mario
Console: Nintendo Entertainment System
Title: Fever
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: ThatHiddenCharacter


Replacement Information:

Links to Existing Sheet: MUS | MIDI | PDF
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)

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ThatHiddenCharacter

After talking about this for a long time, I'm finally submitting it. I need to work on my procrastination problem. Eh, I'll do it later.

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Latios212

Good effort, this sheet badly needs to be replaced. However, there's still a bunch to be done. Check the notes in m. 6 again. THE RH is completely off. It's in the wrong octave and the harmonies you put there are nonexistent. Listen for the repeating G's.

Use different layers to differentiate the melody from the middle layer in m. 19+.

And come on, don't copy measure 10 from the sheet you're trying to replace.
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Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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Sebastian

Quote from: Latios212 on November 02, 2017, 08:25:43 PMAnd come on, don't copy measure 10 from the sheet you're trying to replace.
Yeah, I agree with Latios here. Try to be conscientious about this in the future. A replacement is from scratch. Please don't copy from the sheet being replaced in the future.



ThatHiddenCharacter

Sorry for taking a month to get to this. I didn't realize it had been so long. I've been a bit busy lately, but I'd be lying if I said I hadn't had time to do this.

@Latios, I made the changes you suggested.

@Seb, That was unintentional. I was leaving that part for last because of it's difficulty, but I must've forgotten to do it and left the original measure there. I was using the original file just for the measure count and some templateishness.
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Olimar12345

Quote from: Sebastian on November 02, 2017, 08:28:48 PMA challenge replacement is from scratch.

Ftfy.

Anyway, I'll check your arrangement out more later today. Upon first inspection your layerwork is inconsistent beginning at the lower half of the first page. Also, remove all 8va markings from the LH. Nothing you have goes high enough to warrant the need for any adjustments.
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Olimar12345

alright:

-Remove all 8va markings from the LH. Nothing you have goes high enough to warrant the need for any adjustments.
-The Eb's in measure5 (LH) should be D#'s
-The droning G's in the RH in measure 6 should be an octave lower.
-The F at the end of the bar in 14 (as well as the F# at the end of the bar in 15 and the C at the end of the bar in measure 18) (LH) should also have an octave higher. I'd recommend giving these notes the tenuto articulation as well. (make these changes to measures 27, 28, and 30 as well)
-Measures 12, 15, 16, 27, and 28 all have quarter rests on beat four, RH, both layers. For these spots, mark them with only one quarter rest and center it in the middle of the staff as if there was only one layer.
-Measure 21, LH beat 4 E should be a fourth-line F. Same in 25.
-Measure 22 LH all E's should be D's. Same in 26.
-Alright it's that time. Measure 10 is indeed a bear. Rather than try to explain how I think it should go, here's a picture:
Spoiler

That's got to be worth more than a thousand words, right? Yeesh.
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-Swap the layers from 19-26 (RH).
-All of the low G's in measure 22 (RH) should be F's below that. Make this change in measure 26 as well.
-The B on beat two of measure 22 (RH) should be the C above that. Make this change in measure 26 as well.
-The first system on the second page gets really close to the page number, etc. I'd recommend changing your system margins to accommodate that.
-The A#'s in measures 11, 13, 15, 16, 27, and 28 should be Bb's.
-You could probably fit this all onto two pages without a whole lot of editing.

Aaaaaaaaaaand I think that's everything I can think of. Here's a file containing all of the changes:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/icg9hica1xgiwp9/Dr.%20Mario%20-%20Fever12345.mus?dl=1

Visit my site: VGM Sheet Music by Olimar12345 ~ Quality VGM sheet music available for free!

Latios212

Just to tack on to the above (thanks Olimar!) -
- Needs an opening dynamic.
- I know the low voice in the original drops out from measures 3-5 and 7-9, but as a piano arrangement I think it sounds awfully empty there, and I'm not a fan of choosing that voice for the left hand.
How about trying something like this? Listen to how much more complete this makes a single voice in each hand sound. It also makes the transitions to and from the surrounding measures much less jarring.

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Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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[close]
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Olimar12345

Quote from: Latios212 on December 21, 2017, 10:10:22 AM- I know the low voice in the original drops out from measures 3-5 and 7-9, but as a piano arrangement I think it sounds awfully empty there, and I'm not a fan of choosing that voice for the left hand.
How about trying something like this? Listen to how much more complete this makes a single voice in each hand sound. It also makes the transitions to and from the surrounding measures much less jarring.

Eh idk. Technically no voices drop out there, they're all just 8va, which changes how it sounds and differentiates it from the rest of the piece (THC just didn't include the third voice there).
Visit my site: VGM Sheet Music by Olimar12345 ~ Quality VGM sheet music available for free!

Latios212

Fair enough, but even at the higher octave I would still recommend this voice over the one currently written in. It's more interesting and is more consistent with the LH voice in other places.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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Olimar12345

#10
Quote from: Latios212 on December 21, 2017, 10:30:25 AMFair enough, but even at the higher octave I would still recommend this voice over the one currently written in. It's more interesting and is more consistent with the LH voice in other places.

Well I could argue that it is different enough to be more interesting that the bass line that persists throughout the rest of the entire tune. Also, it's louder, making it a more prominent voice. It's also the lowest voice, technically making it the bass.

Edit: I added a dynamic marking to the file I posted.
Visit my site: VGM Sheet Music by Olimar12345 ~ Quality VGM sheet music available for free!

Latios212

Well, that's my recommendation after testing both out on my keyboard.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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[close]
turtle

ThatHiddenCharacter

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LeviR.star

Thc, don't you think the main melody should have a bit more staccato?
Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

Latios212

My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle