Submission Information:
Series: Super Mario
Game: Paper Mario: Color Splash
Console: Wii U
Title: Island in Violet
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: SombreroGuy123 (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?action=profile;u=5070)
[attachment deleted by admin]
Hi, welcome to NSM! Quite a solid sheet you got here. Can't check notes at the moment but here's some visual feedback:
- Composer/arranger info is too far to the right - use Ctrl+Shift+] to align it correctly.
- Try putting more space between systems on pages 1 and 3 - articulations on high/low notes get awfully close to the notes on other staves. You have some free space on page 3, so you can afford to shift everything down a bit.
Hi, thank you for this feedback!
Just corrected these two points.
Just noticed that the eighth rest in measure 6 doesn't have the beam over it. Every other similar measure has it.
Updated.
Thanks, I didn't notice that one.
Good stuff, friend. Some things from me:
- Rather than using Garritan, I would suggest just using the SmartMusic SoftSynth. Long story but basically it makes it nice to those with an older version of ARIA.
- Measures 1-4 and 13-17, RH: I think you'd benefit more in these measures by using the treble clef. No reason to use bass clef so far as I can see.
- Measure 20-21: I'm not really sure where the sub. p is supposed to be. Maybe find a way to clear that up? Also you have extra space on the bottom of this page so feel free to not crunch things in so much
- Maybe some nicer spacing on the last page would be in order.
- Measure 23, RH: Db should be C#.
- Measures 17-23, LH: I'm not hearing the grace notes in here. Also, bonus points for you if you can find a way to make it clear that the bass has the melody (perhaps including but not limited to writing it in it's own voice rather than mish-mash with the rest of the bass accompaniment).
- Measures 17 and on: You're going to want to split dynamics, since I doubt you want the melody in the bass going subito piano like everything else. Put sub. p in the right hand and find a way to make the melody a bit more prominent. Especially if it's going to share a register with the bass accompaniment.
- Measure 22, RH: The clarinet bit has some wrong notes here. Starting at the triplet (to the end of the measure) the notes should be Bb, C, Bb, Ab, Bb.
There may be more yet, but that should hold you over for the time being.
Oh, also the title, are you sure it's that?
Found this:
Vortex Island is a location in PMCS when I looked it up... then again I don't really know anything about the game or its soundtrack.
I've beaten Color Splash, and Vortex Island is the name of the level where this track is used.
Boomp
Updated.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Rather than using Garritan, I would suggest just using the SmartMusic SoftSynth. Long story but basically it makes it nice to those with an older version of ARIA.
OK.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Measures 1-4 and 13-17, RH: I think you'd benefit more in these measures by using the treble clef. No reason to use bass clef so far as I can see.
Done.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Measure 20-21: I'm not really sure where the sub. p is supposed to be. Maybe find a way to clear that up? Also you have extra space on the bottom of this page so feel free to not crunch things in so much
I made the measure wider and put the sub. p as far to the right as possible. Should look better now.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Measures 17-23, LH: I'm not hearing the grace notes in here. Also, bonus points for you if you can find a way to make it clear that the bass has the melody (perhaps including but not limited to writing it in it's own voice rather than mish-mash with the rest of the bass accompaniment).
Deleted the grace notes and put the melody into an own voice.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Measures 17 and on: You're going to want to split dynamics, since I doubt you want the melody in the bass going subito piano like everything else. Put sub. p in the right hand and find a way to make the melody a bit more prominent. Especially if it's going to share a register with the bass accompaniment.
OK, dynamics are split now. But I can't find any way to make that audible in the .mus and .midi files. It works with using different MIDI channels for the two systems but then there would be some problems with the dynamics that are assigned to both systems. Finale's user manual doesn't write anything about split dynamics and I feel I've searched through the whole internet without finding a solution. Perhaps I'm overlooking something obvious, but could somebody please tell me how to do it? :-\
Quote from: JDMEK5 on December 14, 2016, 08:07:08 PM- Measure 22, RH: The clarinet bit has some wrong notes here. Starting at the triplet (to the end of the measure) the notes should be Bb, C, Bb, Ab, Bb.
Yeah, the notes were completely wrong here. But I'm not sure about the Ab, isn't it more an A ♮?
By the way I had to delete the pedal markings at the end because there were some issues with MIDI output after the repetition. But I don't think they were really necessary.
Oh, and I changed the name to "Vortex Island". Not quite sure if that's the official name of the soundtrack, but it seems to be used by majority so "Vortex Island" should be the better option here.
Finally, sorry for the long time since the last update, I had a lot of things to do in the past weeks.
Quote from: SombreroGuy123 on January 15, 2017, 03:52:35 AMOK, dynamics are split now. But I can't find any way to make that audible in the .mus and .midi files. It works with using different MIDI channels for the two systems but then there would be some problems with the dynamics that are assigned to both systems. Finale's user manual doesn't write anything about split dynamics and I feel I've searched through the whole internet without finding a solution. Perhaps I'm overlooking something obvious, but could somebody please tell me how to do it?
It can be done, but it's a bit tricky. You were on the right track by splitting the channels though. Here's the rest of the procedure:
1) Make sure your channels are split. You had this which is good.
2) When placing a dynamic, you can right click the handle and one of the options from the drop down should open up a dialog box which should have an area to manually tell it which layer to affect in playback. I can't remember what it's called off-hand.
3) If you want a dynamic working on both staves/channels, put it down for either one, then go to the expression definition box and make a duplicate of the dynamic level you want.
4) Go to your new duplicate and hit "Edit". Hit the following things in order: The playback tab at the top, then back to the first tab, then check off the "Hidden" box. After that, hit OK.
5) You should now have a clone of the dynamic you want except that it'll be invisible. At this point it's more of a controller. Splat that sucker in right over the other one and make sure your invisible one is affecting the channel that isn't being covered by the visible one.
Sorry for the amount of ambiguity in that; I don't really remember what it all looks like as I don't have access to Finale atm.
*Oh also, if you didn't follow the proper order of operations in step 4, it may result in a hidden dynamic that doesn't actually do anything. If that happens, go to "Edit", then hit the playback tab and make sure it's affecting Velocity in the way that you want.
Quote from: SombreroGuy123 on January 15, 2017, 03:52:35 AMYeah, the notes were completely wrong here. But I'm not sure about the Ab, isn't it more an A ♮?
Yup you're right. A natural. My bad.
Quote from: SombreroGuy123 on January 15, 2017, 03:52:35 AMOh, and I changed the name to "Vortex Island". Not quite sure if that's the official name of the soundtrack, but it seems to be used by majority so "Vortex Island" should be the better option here.
Fabulous.
Quote from: SombreroGuy123 on January 15, 2017, 03:52:35 AMFinally, sorry for the long time since the last update, I had a lot of things to do in the past weeks.
Lol you're not the only one.
Something else that grabbed my attention actually were the grace notes. Make them slashed eighth notes instead of 32nds. If it throws the playback off a bit, oh well; but if it matters that much to you I think someone (was it Mael or FA?..) had a way to use invisible 3rd layer to manipulate the playback without affecting the visuals. But visuals are certainly highest priority.
I don't know if I'm a bit late with this, but the official name for this song IS Island in Violet. The song plays on both Vortex Island and Lighthouse Island.
Source?
It's in the sound test for the game. In the game. When you unlock the sound test.
Picture (https://www.dropbox.com/s/pu9n5xwcfbu99y9/20170123_202656.jpg?dl=0)
Quote from: ThatHiddenCharacter on January 23, 2017, 05:30:30 PMIt's in the sound test for the game. In the game. When you unlock the sound test.
straight from the department of redundancy department
ok I have a new signature
Quote from: JDMEK5 on January 19, 2017, 07:29:46 AMIt can be done, but it's a bit tricky. You were on the right track by splitting the channels though. Here's the rest of the procedure:
1) Make sure your channels are split. You had this which is good.
2) When placing a dynamic, you can right click the handle and one of the options from the drop down should open up a dialog box which should have an area to manually tell it which layer to affect in playback. I can't remember what it's called off-hand.
3) If you want a dynamic working on both staves/channels, put it down for either one, then go to the expression definition box and make a duplicate of the dynamic level you want.
4) Go to your new duplicate and hit "Edit". Hit the following things in order: The playback tab at the top, then back to the first tab, then check off the "Hidden" box. After that, hit OK.
5) You should now have a clone of the dynamic you want except that it'll be invisible. At this point it's more of a controller. Splat that sucker in right over the other one and make sure your invisible one is affecting the channel that isn't being covered by the visible one.
Thanks for the instruction. It looks like I had already done all this before the update, but then deleted the hidden dynamics because they look a bit ugly in the .mus. But if that's OK, the problem should be solved now.
Quote from: JDMEK5 on January 19, 2017, 07:29:46 AMSomething else that grabbed my attention actually were the grace notes. Make them slashed eighth notes instead of 32nds. If it throws the playback off a bit, oh well; but if it matters that much to you I think someone (was it Mael or FA?..) had a way to use invisible 3rd layer to manipulate the playback without affecting the visuals. But visuals are certainly highest priority.
Playback seems to work with eighth notes fortunately.
Two other things:
- Last time I forgot to mention that I added a few notes in measures 17-20 (RH) to make the bass melody stronger.
- The name is now "Island in Violet" again.
This arrangement is great!
A few general things:
In the future, be careful about not adding to many harmonies. I'd be against it here, but it adds to the feel of the song.
2nd, if the bassline doesn't change, don't change how it's played. Again, it's fine here as it emphasizes the changes in dynamics, but the trombone is playing exactly the same notes in the intro as in the actual song, but it's notated differently in different places.
Specific stuff:
m8, b3-4, LH, it's a descending scale thingy. It's D-C-Bb-A
Be carful about overlapping notes. Add parenthesis where you can, and remove notes other places. For example, m10 has the c3 doubled on beat 4.
I'm not convinced that m17 to halfway through 20 in the Rh actually exist in the song. I think it's supposed to be the guitar, but it doesn't match up. The only part of the song that's weak note-wise at all.
You've got a lot of white space on pg1. Rearranging it could also fix how uncomfortable close the composer is to the game title. The composer/arranger block should be firmly below the song title and game title.
EDIT: AND I FORGOT TO MENTION THE FLOATING REST IN M8
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 28, 2017, 08:50:40 PMThis arrangement is great!
Thanks!
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 28, 2017, 08:50:40 PM2nd, if the bassline doesn't change, don't change how it's played. Again, it's fine here as it emphasizes the changes in dynamics, but the trombone is playing exactly the same notes in the intro as in the actual song, but it's notated differently in different places.
I removed the fifths, perhaps they are too heavy at some points anyway.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 28, 2017, 08:50:40 PMm8, b3-4, LH, it's a descending scale thingy. It's D-C-Bb-A
Be carful about overlapping notes. Add parenthesis where you can, and remove notes other places. For example, m10 has the c3 doubled on beat 4.
Done.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 28, 2017, 08:50:40 PMI'm not convinced that m17 to halfway through 20 in the Rh actually exist in the song.
Wrote a new version. Only problem: the guitar chord in m20, b2. Actually, it must be C minor, but this sounds kind of wrong because the C collides with the Bb in the melody. Does anyone have an idea? (Ignore the chord in the current version, it's just one of many failed attempts...)
Incidentally it is intended that m18 b1, RH, has no slur. It's actually not part of the melody.
Quote from: Maelstrom on January 28, 2017, 08:50:40 PMYou've got a lot of white space on pg1. Rearranging it could also fix how uncomfortable close the composer is to the game title. The composer/arranger block should be firmly below the song title and game title.
EDIT: AND I FORGOT TO MENTION THE FLOATING REST IN M8
Done.
Latios and I did a final pass. Approve this and it's probably good to go:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/5t0g8n74oj4dfom/Island%20in%20Violet.mus?dl=0
Thank you, great job!
I just made two small changes:
- m.18 RH: I'm pretty sure that it's C D G and not C Eb G - sorry if I'm wrong.
- m.37 RH: The note stems were too short here I think.
Apart from that, this arrangement should be finished now. Thanks for all your feedback!
Quote from: SombreroGuy123 on February 19, 2017, 05:19:41 AMThank you, great job!
I just made two small changes:
- m.18 RH: I'm pretty sure that it's C D G and not C Eb G - sorry if I'm wrong.
- m.37 RH: The note stems were too short here I think.
Apart from that, this arrangement should be finished now. Thanks for all your feedback!
m18 RH - I'm inclined to say it's C En G rather than either of the two.
m37 RH - Good idea.
Fix that last thing and it's ready to go.
OK, done.
Great, accepted.
This submission has been accepted by Latios212 (http://forum.ninsheetmusic.org/index.php?action=profile;u=4344).
~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot