Quote from: Latios212 on March 09, 2024, 03:11:06 PMAh I like this for m. 9-20, but not past that. It gets too high for my preference if I raise 17-20 up an octave. Plus this way, the transitions into and out of that section also work very smoothly. I adjusted the harmony a little bit where I've turned the melody into octaves, and also added parentheses to the high Ab in m. 11 since that octave jump can be a bit annoying and I think that top note can be omitted without much of a loss sound-wise.Hm, to me 17-20 are the climax of the piece so it makes sense to keep the octaves there, suddenly taking them out feels like a drop in energy vs in the original where it sounds like it's increasing in energy. The transitions in the original are kind of abrupt as well, so as much as I like smoothness it feels less accurate to me this way. That's just my two cents though, feel free to keep it as is if you prefer! I'd be interested to hear others' opinions on this.
Quote from: Latios212 on March 09, 2024, 03:11:06 PMLet me know if you'd prefer more harmony in m. 12 and maybe 10 for that matter?)Ah yeah, I think adding Cs to both beats in m10 and Bbs to both beats in m12 would be nice.
Quote from: Latios212 on March 09, 2024, 03:11:06 PMThirds sound good. Not sure if the D's would fit in too nicely here, I think it's fine without?Yeah it's probably fine without the Ds. Also I think the bottom note on beat 2 is actually an F rather than a G.
Quote from: Latios212 on March 09, 2024, 03:11:06 PMI included it in the bottom of the current chords, sounds good?To me raising those horn chords an octave and inverting them kind of falsely implies that they're part of the melody, whereas I hear them as more of a background texture in the original. I think keeping them down in the original octave and inversion would help avoid that, although what you have is fine if you don't want to do that.
Quote from: Latios212 on March 09, 2024, 03:11:06 PMFor beat 2, to confirm, did you mean there's a Bn under the D, that would clash with the bass Bb?Yep, it's the b9 of the Bb7(b9) chord. I agree with raising the LH here as well, I actually meant to suggest that as a second option but I forgot lol.
Everything else looks great!