Comments on Paper NSM and the Thousand Year Door

[mayastarr041]

Sorry




"Hey!" a voice rang out as I turned to see a blue Bob-omb, "You knew here?"  -->  "Hey!" a voice rang out as I turned to see a blue Bob-omb, "You new here?"

Uknown to her a grunt was behind her and was about to strike.  -->  Unknown to her, a grunt was behind her and was about to strike.

Trains sidestepped and gave him him a hard kick.  -->  She sidestepped and gave him a hard kick. (You don't know who the girl is yet)

The air grew darker and colder and tendrils of Shadows wrapped around us, restricting movement.  -->  The air grew darker and colder and tendrils of shadows wrapped around us, restricting movement.

She growled and for a moment, something weird happened.  -->  The queen growled and for a moment, something weird happened. (The reader can mistake "She" for Trains)

"Watch where you're going loser!" he yelled at us.  -->  "Watch where you're going, loser!" he yelled at us.

"We are trying tog fight the Shadow Queen and obtain the crystal stars," Trains explained as Pianist tensed again.  -->  "We are trying too fight the Shadow Queen and obtain the crystal stars," Trains explained as Pianist tensed again.

"We could use are not her member."  -->  "We could use another member."

Oh thank you! I just realized those! You're the best!
I should really check more thoroughly! Thanks again!

[braix]

lol whoops, fixed haha

[ThatGamer]

Sorry




"Hey!" a voice rang out as I turned to see a blue Bob-omb, "You knew here?"  -->  "Hey!" a voice rang out as I turned to see a blue Bob-omb, "You new here?"

Uknown to her a grunt was behind her and was about to strike.  -->  Unknown to her, a grunt was behind her and was about to strike.

Trains sidestepped and gave him him a hard kick.  -->  She sidestepped and gave him a hard kick. (You don't know who the girl is yet)

The air grew darker and colder and tendrils of Shadows wrapped around us, restricting movement.  -->  The air grew darker and colder and tendrils of shadows wrapped around us, restricting movement.

She growled and for a moment, something weird happened.  -->  The queen growled and for a moment, something weird happened. (The reader can mistake "She" for Trains)

"Watch where you're going loser!" he yelled at us.  -->  "Watch where you're going, loser!" he yelled at us.

"We are trying tog fight the Shadow Queen and obtain the crystal stars," Trains explained as Pianist tensed again.  -->  "We are trying too fight the Shadow Queen and obtain the crystal stars," Trains explained as Pianist tensed again.

"We could use are not her member."  -->  "We could use another member."

Braixen, you fool, you got it wrong still...

We are trying to fight the shadow queen...

[mayastarr041]

No.

Not to be rude or anything, Dudeman's quite nice, but no shipping me with anybody. Or else I'll use my hammer/cannon and blast your brains out. Got it? Great! 

Also Braix, it's "We are trying to  fight the Shadow Queen"

Yes ma'm, I won't be shipping you with anyone!
I want to be in one piece! 

[braix]

You posted that 7 seconds after I fixed it TG

[ThatGamer]

Oops, looks like Trains and Braixen beat me too it!

see what i did there

[mayastarr041]

I'm literally face palmung hard. Are not her member? *groan*

[Dudeman]

Not to be rude or anything, Dudeman's quite nice, but no shipping me with anybody. Or else I'll use my hammer/cannon and blast your brains out. Got it? Great! 

dudeman x trains action make it happen

[Hero of Trains]

dudeman x trains action make it happen

BANG.

[braix]

I'm literally face palmung hard. Are not her member? *groan*  -->  I'm literally face palming hard. Another member? *groan*

[mayastarr041]

Very funny Braix. I really need a spell checker for tissue damn site.

[Dudeman]

Very funny Braix. I really need a spell checker for tissue damn site. --> Very funny Braix. I really need a spell checker for this damn site.

okay im done

[braix]

Very funny Braix. I really need a spell checker for tissue damn site.

You can send me the chapters before you release them so I can edit it for you.
You get spell check, I get early access! Win win!

[mayastarr041]

Not you too Dudrman! Aren't you supposed to be dead? Trains shot you!

[mayastarr041]

You can send me the chapters before you release them so I can edit it for you.
You get spell check, I get early access! Win win!

Hmmmmm. Nope!
I'm kidding! You have yourself a deal!