[3DS] Fire Emblem Awakening - ""......"" by Libera

Started by Zeta, September 20, 2018, 07:59:49 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Fire Emblem
Game: Fire Emblem Awakening
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: "......"
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Libera

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Libera

#1
This is an absolutely amazing track and shouldn't be too hard to check.


Edit: I left out the quotations marks on the actual sheet but I can put them back in.

Zeila

Nice work! Most of what I have to say is minor stuff

- Composer/arranger info isn't right aligned
- It's https now
- Flip the tie in m1
- You should move the decrescendo in m13 a little lower
- The last two pedal markings aren't actually hidden, and if that was intentional you can align them horizontally by selecting both of them and right clicking the one with the desired position. You can also do this with some of the hairpins like in system 3 if you want, but I don't think it's necessary
- I'm not certain, but it sounds like there is still a C# in m7 albeit it isn't as pronounced as the F# (LH)

Also, I don't think the quotation marks are worth it

WaluigiTime64

In your submission, filenames, and the sheet itself, you've written 5 dots, but in the youtube video and (what I believe is) the official soundtrack listing, it's 6 dots.

Quote from: Zeila on September 21, 2018, 06:43:04 PM- I'm not certain, but it sounds like there is still a C# in m7 albeit it isn't as pronounced as the F# (LH)
This is correct, though you can really only hear it ringing in Beat 2 before moving to the D in the lower part of the RH. For consistency with the other C# to D movements throughout the piece it might be good to add this in, though it's incredibly quiet in this bar. Your choice, really.

Also using minim=30 instead of crotchet=60 is an interesting choice, but I can imagine why you did that. Overall, a very nice sheet.
My Arrangements (All Outdated)
My Compositions (All Outdated)
Quote from: WaluigiTime64I strive for second place and I will fight for the position.

Latios212

re: official (North American) English title on my 3DS
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...yes, you've misspelled it, it should be six dots xD

Keep the single set of double quotation marks in the sheet, having more would be silly. But change the submission make to use a single set of double quotation marks, instead of single quotation marks. The title of the topic will look funny, but the titles on the main site display without the extra set of quotation marks, similar to the two Awakening sheets already on site.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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turtle

Brassman388

I've been trying to find out how rubato it is and I'm not having any success.

Libera

Yes I have misspelled it.  Latios will never let me live this down now.

@Zeila, Waluigi: Thanks for giving it a look, I really appreciate it!  I've made all of the changes that were suggested and have updated the files.
Quote from: Zeila on September 21, 2018, 06:43:04 PM- Composer/arranger info isn't right aligned
Every time I miss this I get irrationally angry at myself.
Quote from: Zeila on September 21, 2018, 06:43:04 PM- The last two pedal markings aren't actually hidden, and if that was intentional you can align them horizontally by selecting both of them and right clicking the one with the desired position.
Yeah those were meant to be hidden like the rest so thanks for catching those. :P

Latios212

Alright, time to check! I took a halfhearted stab at this song a while back and didn't come up with a good way to notate the layers and rubato. But you've done a great job of that; all the rhythms and everything make sense.

- Submission title still has only five dots :P
- Some of your cresc./dims open up a lot wider than others. Intentional? I'd suggestion slimming them down to a consistent size.
- Watch the left hand in m. 15-16; the stem of the A overlaps the tie and the tie from the A touches the C#. Poke around with these ties a bit to avoid overlap.
- Maybe move the molto rit in 22 between the staves. It looks a bit oddly placed all the way up there.
- There's an extra space between Intelligent Systems and the copyright :P
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Libera

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2018, 11:39:42 AM- Submission title still has only five dots :P
-_- I swear if me confusing five for six becomes a joke on here I'm leaving the site.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2018, 11:39:42 AM- Some of your cresc./dims open up a lot wider than others. Intentional? I'd suggestion slimming them down to a consistent size.
Definitely intentional, but if you think it looks bad I'll change it.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2018, 11:39:42 AM- Watch the left hand in m. 15-16; the stem of the A overlaps the tie and the tie from the A touches the C#. Poke around with these ties a bit to avoid overlap.
I have now discovered that a tie tool exists in finale.  I am still a baby my apologies.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2018, 11:39:42 AM- Maybe move the molto rit in 22 between the staves. It looks a bit oddly placed all the way up there.
Sure.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 23, 2018, 11:39:42 AM- There's an extra space between Intelligent Systems and the copyright :P
...How did you spot this...? 

Files are updated.  Thanks for looking it over. <3

Brassman388

The only thing I could see was that if the half note equals 30bpm, then your time sig may need to reflect that. It's a pretty free form song so even opting for a 4/2 wouldn't be bad.

Also, if you have hairpins with a lot of space inbetween each cresc, and decresc. consider putting an additional dynamic in those spaces to get real dynamic clarity.

That's all I got.

Libera

Quote from: Brassman388 on September 23, 2018, 06:12:02 PMThe only thing I could see was that if the half note equals 30bpm, then your time sig may need to reflect that. It's a pretty free form song so even opting for a 4/2 wouldn't be bad.
This worked surprisingly well, in fact I think it makes so much more sense like this.  (It also de-clutters the page by getting rid of all of those horrible ties.)

Quote from: Brassman388 on September 23, 2018, 06:12:02 PMAlso, if you have hairpins with a lot of space inbetween each cresc, and decresc. consider putting an additional dynamic in those spaces to get real dynamic clarity.
Done.

Thanks for looking it over!

Latios212

Ooh nice. A more free-form look. Only concern is that it seems harder to count like this, but that might even be a good thing given the nature of this song.

Before I approve. just checking do the wider crescendos imply more pronounced changes in volume? It also seems kinda funny you only have dynamics in the first and last systems and nowhere in the middle. But I'm okay with that.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

Spoiler
[close]
turtle

Libera

Quote from: Latios212 on September 25, 2018, 05:42:07 PMA more free-form look. Only concern is that it seems harder to count like this, but that might even be a good thing given the nature of this song.
That was my thinking.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 25, 2018, 05:42:07 PMjust checking do the wider crescendos imply more pronounced changes in volume?
Yes.

Quote from: Latios212 on September 25, 2018, 05:42:07 PMIt also seems kinda funny you only have dynamics in the first and last systems and nowhere in the middle. But I'm okay with that.
There are dynamics in the first, second and last systems.  I only added them in where I thought they were necessary but if you think there are more places that they're needed I can put some extra ones in.

Brassman388

Quote from: Libera on September 26, 2018, 04:43:07 AMYes.

You should just have the dynamics doing that for you, not the hairpin itself.

Additional comments about this are welcome.

Libera

Quote from: Brassman388 on September 26, 2018, 01:32:41 PMYou should just have the dynamics doing that for you, not the hairpin itself.

To be honest I didn't realise it was all that weird of a thing to do.  I now know for in future, though.  I've changed the files to remove them.

Thanks!