It's been a while so I'm not sure if you're still bothered, but any Updater can feel free to update the files, because I'm bogged down with work right now. Apologies. Run things by me and I'll hopefully be able to give a "yes" or "maybe this instead".
ahoy, 'tis me, I'm making some edits as listed below:
m45-52 LH: You might want to consider thinning out the LH here since both hands are in the low register. Maybe get rid of the upper octave notes on beats 2 and 3.5.[/li][/list]
I can see it going both ways (because I happen to like the bassy-ness of that section) but if other Updaters also want to change it then I'll happily let that happen.
Yeah, I think we could do without the fourths in the left hand - that sounds muddy, and the low single notes gets the point across well enough.
-I'm pretty sure m43 has some whole note in the left hand upon playback. Not exactly sure which note though.
Good catch. It's an Eb. The following measure is also missing the quick jab of an F to parallel the right hand.
For your optional left hand part, try this instead:
The last measure of it is missing the end barlines as well.
I fixed this too.
-It might be a better call to split the repeat for m52 so you could possibly play the piano and sax solo together for repeat #2.
I think this is a good idea to keep the piano lead-in to the following section.
-I think in bars 45-52 the right hand would be better just in bass clef rather than 8vb treble (which is pretty non-standard.)
The problem is how the sax ranges from D near Low-C to Bb near High-C. With either just a bass clef or treble clef, you're getting 4 leger lines. I don't like using an 8vb on a treble clef either, but it looks much better than other options (that aren't literally using an alto clef lol).
How about just treble clef? The first chord in m. 45 is pretty palatable since it's anchored by the B flat on top. The only other place that's pushing it is m. 51 beat 4, but it's still not so bad since you can read the fourth from the G below the staff. We could also change just that part to the end of the phrase to bass clef.
Other misc things:
- Made some margin adjustments to be consistent across all pages, and pushed a system off of page 2 (there's more space on the last page).
- m. 42 LH beat 4 should be C, not D
Looking over the rest of the sheet/comments, I think we're in pretty good shape, although I do have one final concern. The beat 1 and beat 3 chord on the first page - I don't feel like the contour is right with the top line descending from C to Bb; rather when I listen to the original I hear the C leading up to a D. As such I would recommend including the top D in m. 8 to create a Gm triad for the downbeats in m. 1-12. (There's also an F up top I think but we can do without that if you want.) I haven't made this change yet, but I feel we should.