[NDS] Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time - "Bowser Battle (Duet)" by WobbliestGem

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Super Mario
Game: Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time
Console: Nintendo DS
Title: Bowser Battle
Instrumentation Piano Duet
Arranger: WobbliestGem

[attachment deleted by admin]

[Static]

Welcome to NinSheetMusic! I'm glad to see you're submitting some new sheets, but I'm afraid this one has some major issues...

• Your .mus file is un-openable by me (I'm using Finale 2014). Libera, another updater, tried opening it with v26 and no luck there either. You should try re-exporting it.
• I'm not in the business of making baseless accusations, but the very specific way your rhythms are all wrong hints at this sheet being a MIDI dump (taking a raw MIDI file and opening it in Finale). Sheets submitted to this website should be arranged by ear with the help of the original music files, not through fan-generated MIDI files.
• If you listen to the original track, you can tell it starts right on beat 1, with the bass part being a constant stream of 8th notes. A lot of times, generating a MIDI and importing it will result in your rhythms being skewed by a 16th note or so, which is what it looks like here.
• Several parts are simply unplayable, especially the part starting at m16. Some of these intervals span over two octaves with one hand, which is impossible to play. This is also a common symptom of MIDI imports.
• I have an unfinished arrangement of this from a few years ago sitting around, and just from seeing the first four measures you can immediately tell a clear difference. These are how the rhythms are supposed to look:
  
  Spoiler

  

  [close]

In its current state, this arrangement is unacceptable, so I suggest rewriting the entire thing by just listening to the original track on YouTube. If you want help with how to go about doing this, feel free to ask, we're here to help you! It's just that if you're going to put that "Arranged by you" text on this sheet, you have to put in the work of transcribing by ear.

[WobbliestGem]

I completely reworked the piece, and if the .mus file does not work, I have no idea why, it's most likely because I'm using a 3rd party software.

[Static]

Looks much, much better! Very good...

I'd like to help you out on some formatting fixes, but I still can't open the .mus file. Finale says it's an invalid file type.

It looks like you used MuseScore for the PDF, so export this file as .xml in MuseScore, then open in Finale Notepad (free on the Finale site) and save as .mus.

[WobbliestGem]

I installed Finale Notepad and was able to transfer everything successfully.

[Static]

Alright, here's some feedback for you. Here's the files with all the changes below, for your convenience. If the changes look good, feel free to update the submission with these files.

• This looks like it's written as a duet (4 hands, 1 piano) rather than a two piano arrangement, so instead of Piano I and Piano II, it should be Primo and Secondo for the first system.
• The font and font sizes are incorrect throughout; they should all be Times New Roman.
• Title should be "Mario & Luigi" rather than "and."
• There are no official titles for this particular track that have been released, so I suggest going with the most commonly used unofficial title which is simply "Bowser Battle".
• Copyright text is missing the NinSheetMusic url.
• I hear the tempo a touch slower in the original, around 148bpm.
• Measure numbers are missing.
• In that screenshot, I did put the piece in G# minor... but that doesn't mean you have to. It's actually in a major key (using the double harmonic major scale).
• Going off of the above - you also didn't need to just copy what I had written - the point was just to show you the rhythms. That file is from several years ago when I wasn't as experienced and I wouldn't write it that way now. The way I had it written mistakenly combined the low string and piano voices, but really they should be separate. The main "Bowser motif", which appears later in this track as well, should look like this:
  
  Spoiler

  

  [close]
• Likewise, the Secondo RH part should actually be the same between m1-2 and 3-4.
• That chromatic ostinato that first appears in m9 would, in my opinion, be better with just the low octave. Playing all those octaves for so many measures with just one hand is tiring. The upper octave should instead be moved to the Primo.
• Regarding that ostinato again: the chromatic tones should be spelled as neighbor tones. This means B# instead of Cn, Fx instead of Gn, etc.
• The bass/timpani line in the Secondo LH should just be the same note as before when there's two 8th notes together (like m10). It only changes at m21. I also think this might sound better with quarter notes rather than 8th notes, since there's a bit of decay in the original. It doesn't sound that short. Also, in my opinion, I don't think an 8va line is needed for a low Ab, since its only 3 ledger lines below the staff. Other updaters may disagree, and maybe this is just from my trombone experience, but it's really not that bad to read.
• The horn part that comes in at m13 sounds like offbeat 8th notes to me, simpler than what you have. You can also simplified/moved the chords to avoid too many repeated 16ths (m18-19, 22-23 between RH and LH).
• The Primo RH part starting at m9 (the Eb-Ab 4th) seems kind of like a filler part to me. I think it works well in m9-12 but after that it would best be substituted with more active parts. m17-onward is extremely demanding when you have it all in the Primo LH - you could move the melody to the Primo RH and keep just the offbeat chords in the LH.
• Your sheet has two full loops of the track written out, but you only need one. Put a repeat sign (preferably a D.S.) at the end of m38 that leads back to m9. That cuts down half the pages for you.
• The 8th note line in m25-26 should match in the Primo and Secondo in terms of pitch. A crescendo through these two measures would work nicely as well, I think.
• You're missing the bass notes on beat 1 of m31 and 33.
• The bass doesn't actually fully return until m37.

I think you'll find this new version is much cleaner and easier to play, while keeping the same texture. If you have any questions or disagreements, let me know.

For whoever checks this next, I was unsure about the offbeat chords in m25-26. They're quite hard to hear...

[WobbliestGem]

Thank you so much. I really appreciate all the help, I went over and edited my original piece a bit to match yours, and you were right I did notice that there were a lot of things that could be simplified or fixed. I can't wait to post some of my other arrangements in the future.

[Static]

Thank you so much. I really appreciate all the help, I went over and edited my original piece a bit to match yours, and you were right I did notice that there were a lot of things that could be simplified or fixed. I can't wait to post some of my other arrangements in the future.

No problem, glad to help!

For the sake of simplicity and ease, I went ahead and uploaded fresh copies of the files with a few last formatting adjustments for you (removing the url at the bottom of each page, etc. Also note that for piano literature, we try to avoid using ottava clefs and instead use lines or separate text. In this case, I think it reads fine without either, but I put in a note anyway. Approved

[Latios212]

This looks terrific, thanks you two for fixing this one up!

For whoever checks this next, I was unsure about the offbeat chords in m25-26. They're quite hard to hear...

I'm getting this:
You cannot view this attachment.
This also makes musical sense since it's fourths corresponding to the bass, which is consistent with that part in most of the rest of the piece as well.

Anyway this is just about ready to go, a couple of small things:
- The staff abbreviations should be Pri./Sec. according to the formatting guidelines for a one-piano duet
- The footer text is a little too large

I've updated the files accordingly with the above. Will accept shortly unless there are any further concerns

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Latios212.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot