[GEN] Sonic the Hedgehog 3 - "Hydrocity Zone Act 1" (Replacement) by Cashwarrior1

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Sonic
Game: Sonic the Hedgehog 3
Console: Sega Genesis
Title: Hydrocity Zone Act 1
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Cashwarrior1


Replacement Information:
Links to Existing Sheet: MUS | MIDI | PDF
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)

[attachment deleted by admin]

[cashwarrior1]

[Static]

• Key should be Cm. I would argue that most of the piece is not in C dorian so it would make more sense to use the standard Cm keysig.
• m2 RH beat 2 should have a C under the Eb. There's also a G under the C on beat 2.5, but you should probably leave that out.
• m2 RH beat 4.5 should have a C between the As (listen for that middle line, F-Eb-C). You might not want to tie it to beat 1, since it's short in the middle, but tying it would be easier to play because it's less to think about.
• m4 RH beat 3-3.5: I hear the grace note leading to the Eb, not the Bb. In addition, there should be an F under the Bb.
• m4 RH beat 4: The 2nd Layer melody should be Bb-Bn instead of A-Bb.
• m5 RH beat 4: There is a D under the F.
• m6 RH beat 2: There is an An under the C.
• m6 RH beat 4.5: Sounds like there's an F on beat 4.5, but it's a bit soft.
• m12 and 16 RH do not sound 8va to me, they sound as written.
• m16 RH beats 3-5: These dyads should techncially be inverted (F and D on top), but keeping them like this is OK too for ease of playing.
• m24 RH beat 3: The grace should be Bb instead of Eb.
• m29 RH beat 1 should be a dotted quarter instead of 8th+quarter. It's different from m25/33).
• m31-32 RH: On m31 beat 1, there should be a G between the D and upper C. On m31 beat 3, the middle voice should be F instead of D. On m32 beat 3, the middle voice should be D instead of F.
• m34 RH should look the same as m26 and 30.
• m37 RH beats 1-2: There is a middle voice here as well like on beats 3-4.
• m38 RH: Those last few 8th notes (C-E-G#) should be an 8th-note triplet starting on beat 4 instead of normal 8ths.
• m38: G#s should be Abs (Fm7 chord).
• The bassline has quite a few inaccuracies. You should go over the entire bassline using the original audio pitch-shifted up an octave. Here's what I'm getting for m1-8, for example (note the subtle difference between m3 and m7):
  
  Spoiler

  
  If you have any specific questions about other parts of the bassline, just let me know. It might also help to look for certain programs that can split sound channels like this, or an emulator. I haven't messed around much with Genesis/Mega Drive music myself, but these tools seem promising (and similar to other things I use for different consoles). Food for thought, I guess.

  [close]
• When you have two 16th-note triplets next to each other on one beat (like in m12 and 20), you can just write those as a sextuplet.
• 8va markings should begin just to the left of the first note they cover, not over the previous rest (see this thread).
• It is perfectly acceptable to have dotted quarter notes start on beat 1.5 or 3.5 of a 4/4 measure. You don't have to, but just letting you know the option is there.

I know this probably sounds like a lot, but these are all minor issues in a dense sheet.

[cashwarrior1]

• m2 RH beat 2 should have a C under the Eb. There's also a G under the C on beat 2.5, but you should probably leave that out.
• m5 RH beat 4: There is a D under the F.
• m6 RH beat 2: There is an An under the C.

These stuff I originally left out because I wasn't sure if they'd be comfortably playable, but I added them in if you think so

• m12 and 16 RH do not sound 8va to me, they sound as written.

Since the eighth notes on beat 3 were up an octave, I decided to make the whole passage up an octave, which also makes the run back down flow better into the downbeat of the next measure

• m29 RH beat 1 should be a dotted quarter instead of 8th+quarter. It's different from m25/33).

The dangers of copy pasting v_v

• m34 RH should look the same as m26 and 30.

The dangers of copy pasting and not updating v_v

• m38 RH: Those last few 8th notes (C-E-G#) should be an 8th-note triplet starting on beat 4 instead of normal 8ths.

dunno how I messed that one up o.O lol

• The bassline has quite a few inaccuracies. You should go over the entire bassline using the original audio pitch-shifted up an octave. Here's what I'm getting for m1-8, for example (note the subtle difference between m3 and m7):
  

I went through and edited all the bassline, it should be accurate now. I originally was putting more notes up an octave as I thought you could play an octave jump with more ease over hitting the same note when it's swung. Left them down the octave, so if you think it'd be okay to move some up lemme know lol

• It is perfectly acceptable to have dotted quarter notes start on beat 1.5 or 3.5 of a 4/4 measure. You don't have to, but just letting you know the option is there.

I like how the ties look lol

Updated.[/list][/list][/list][/list][/list][/list]

[Static]

Just a few final things:

When you changed the key signature, you forgot to hold notes to original pitches chromatically. It's in the keysig dialog box:

So, as a result, all of your Gbs turned into F#s, when they should be Gbs like before.

And m16 beats 3-4: The rhythm should match with the RH (8th, 8th-tie-quarter). Both Bbs.

That's all I got!

[cashwarrior1]

Updated.

[Static]

Sweet, I'll approve now. Just make sure you remove that courtesy natural in m4 since you no longer need it. Also move the forte in m1 down a bit.

[mastersuperfan]

In the future, you should be very thorough in using AudioStretch to make sure all of your notes are correct—there are still a lot of pitch errors I'm finding here. I've pointed them all out for you now, but for future submissions it would be greatly appreciated if you could work on being able to identify and correct them on your own before submitting.

I'll still refer to the second eighth of each beat as beat 1.5/2.5/3.5/4.5 even though it's swung because beat 2.666666667 is unnecessarily confusing.

General comments:
- You uploaded the wrong mus lol
- I think it looks better for the tempo and the "swing" direction to be on the same line, but this way is okay, I guess.
- In general, I don't think writing staccatos on swung eighth notes (the second eighth note in each beat) is necessary because they're already so short. You can keep them, but I just think they're redundant at this tempo.
- The beaming is a bit inconsistent—you beam in fours most places but not in m32/36 RH. For that matter, though, since it's in swing, I would recommend not beaming over rests or beaming in groups of three at all. Places like the first half of m32 LH look confusing when the eighth notes are beamed as a pair but not actually a swung pair. You can edit this if you go to Document > Document Options > Beams > Uncheck "Include Rests ..." and "Beam Three Eighth Notes ...", and then highlight all measures and go to > Utilities > Rebeam > Rebeam Music.
- The 8va's in m12 and m20 should be extended a little more to the left. Also the one in m40, but less so (only very slightly). The ones in m16 and  m24 is just far left enough to be okay. The 8 should be barely left of the notehead.

Left hand:
- I'm hearing a Bn on m1/5 LH beat 3 and F# on m3/7 LH beat 3 where you have rests. Some (but not all) of these may or may not be percussion that sounds like notes (it's hard for me to tell) but it's pronounced enough that I would personally write them in myself, at least for rhythmic effect.
- m11/19 LH beat 4.5 sounds like F instead of Ab. Likewise, m15 beat 4.5 is G instead of Ab.
- m12 LH, I hear a Cb on beat 3 (staccato) in the bass (I think it should be spelled Cb rather than Bn?). You might also consider writing in Ab's in the LH on beats 1.5/2.5 to mimic the percussion, since the LH is otherwise empty there.
- m16 LH, the bass might(?) be restriking the Bb on beat 4.5... or it might just be percussion again, but I think that it's worth writing it in just for the rhythmic effect, since otherwise you just have a beat and a half with no rhythmic motion.
- I would suggest lowering m31-32 LH an octave—right now, I feel like it goes too high and loses the feeling of being a solid bassline.
- The bass doesn't restrike the G on m32 LH beat 3.5, but there is another voice that plays a D, so I would suggest changing that G to a D.
- Bass note on m40 LH beat 1 is Bn rather than G.

Right hand:
- The beginning rhythm in m1 and m5 sounds like two swung eighths first, and then sixteenth notes afterward, rather than all sixteenth notes from the start.
- How about adding an Eb between the C's on beat 1? It's a pretty prominent harmony.
- You could add an F grace note on m2 beat 1, but it might be tricky to play.
- m3 beat 2.5 sounds like F-A instead of A-C.
- Even though you have Gb's elsewhere, F# seems to make more sense for m4 beat 2 since it's a leading tone.
- You can hide the rest on m4 beat 3 and flip Layer 1 down.
- I already suggested getting rid of staccatos on beat x.5, but if you keep them, then move the staccato on m4 beat 2.5 below the notehead.
- Grace note on m4 beat 3.5 should be D instead of Bb.
- You could add a C under m6 beat 1.5 (unless you don't like the difficulty of re-articulating the C so quickly afterward, in which case you should also consider removing the F on m1 beat 3.5 and the C on m2 beat 1.5).
- The Eb in the chord on m6 beat 4 should be an F instead.
- Not a fan of the F on m6 beat 4.5... it just adds dissonance without really providing a chord. The C seems much more prominent to me; maybe use that instead?
- Not hearing the dyad on m7 beat 1.5... all there is is the high C.
- m7 beat 2 should be F-A instead of A-C and beat 3 Eb-G instead of G-Bb.
- There's a middle C that plays on m3/7 beat 3 that you could add.
- The entire run on m12/20 beat 4 should be raised a step—it's  F-Eb-Db-C-Bb-Ab. Also, with the 8va, that might be a tough jump from m12/20 to m13/21... are you sure you think it's comfortably playable?
- m13 beat 2 lower note should be Ab instead of An.
- m16 sounds like this instead of what you have:

Image

[close]

- m28/36 beat 2 should be C-C#-D instead of C-D-Eb.
- Perhaps add a D to the chord on m31 beat 3? The D (near middle C) from beat 1 is still there. Although if you want to keep it as is to be more consistent the chords in m32, that's fine too.
- You could also consider adding an F to the m32 beat 3 chord as well.
- Did you remove the Ab from m37 beat 4.5 for playability? (Although, those octaves do look pretty hard...)
- I don't hear an Ab on m38 beat 3.
- I don't think I hear Ab's in the chords in m39... instead I hear high G's.

[cashwarrior1]

- Bass note on m40 LH beat 1 is Bn rather than G.

This one I'm absolutely certain is a G. When I listen to it, the bass not doesn't change at all.

- The entire run on m12/20 beat 4 should be raised a step—it's  F-Eb-Db-C-Bb-Ab. Also, with the 8va, that might be a tough jump from m12/20 to m13/21... are you sure you think it's comfortably playable?

I dunno why I had thought that was playable :p

- Not hearing the dyad on m7 beat 1.5... all there is is the high C.

I'm hearing the G, at least

- Did you remove the Ab from m37 beat 4.5 for playability? (Although, those octaves do look pretty hard...)

I removed the octaves and just left the dyads.

Updated.

[Static]

To clear up any confusion regarding this track, I opened it in that Genesis music player I linked in my first post. Some interesting things were discovered:
- The bass note in m40 LH beat 1 is G, not Bn.
- The dyad in m7 beat 1.5 RH should have a C (middle C), no G. Only the lower countermelody voice plays on this specific beat.

[mastersuperfan]

Wrap-up work:
- you spelled the title wrong lol
- Just checking, is it "SEGA Sound Team" and not "The SEGA Sound Team"?
- Tempo is actually h=101 instead of h=100.
- The staccato on m4 RH beat 3 should go above the notehead.
- The tie on m4 RH beat 3.5 should be flipped upward.
- See Static's note on m7 beat 1.5 (middle C).
- Regarding the grace note in m24 RH: Given that the 16th notes right before the quarter note are already so fast, you might consider removing the Bb grace note. Having it there adds to the span of different keys that the player has to play in a very short period of time, which would likely make it sound more cluttered and noisy, not to mention the difficulty.
- In m40, I would recommend moving the D.C. up a bit more (further away from the staff) and right a bit as well (closer to the end of the system).
- In m40, your 8va doesn't start quite as far to the left as the 8va's in m16/24 do. I would drag the left end of this 8va a bit more to the left so that the three 8va's are all consistent.

[cashwarrior1]

- you spelled the title wrong lol

Honestly don't know how that happened

- Just checking, is it "SEGA Sound Team" and not "The SEGA Sound Team"?

For some reason I can't see this written on anything official about sonic 3 (wikipedia just lists all their names), but the website I used to get information about the composer just says "SEGA Sound Team"

[mastersuperfan]

huzzah

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by mastersuperfan.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot