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[SNES] Final Fantasy IV - "Illusionary World" by Renaud Bergeron

Started by Zeta, June 21, 2022, 07:25:33 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Final Fantasy
Game: Final Fantasy IV
Console: Super Nintendo Entertainment System
Title: Illusionary World
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Renaud Bergeron

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Khunjund

Please stop making lists using hyphens.

XiaoMigros

  • I think you can include more of the strings in a separate layer, it seems a little scarce currently.
  • Using cross-staffing you can avoid having rolls in the LH.
  • In m3-4 the F#s should be Gbs.
  • Same comment about system spacing as on your other submission.
  • The D.C. marking can be moved up a bit.
  • I don't see why m2 b1 LH should be in 2 layers.

Khunjund

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMI think you can include more of the strings in a separate layer, it seems a little scarce currently.

OK.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMUsing cross-staffing you can avoid having rolls in the LH.

I don't have a problem with the rolls.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMIn m3-4 the F#s should be Gbs.

While I don't think it's impossible to have a Cmaj7(b5) chord structure, I would only write it that way if there was a clear reason to do so (e.g. the presence of a line going G>[Gb]>F). As-is, I believe Cmaj7(#11) is the more likely interpretation, which is why I use F#.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMSame comment about system spacing as on your other submission.

I redid the spacing.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMThe D.C. marking can be moved up a bit.

Done.

Quote from: XiaoMigros on June 22, 2022, 10:05:42 AMI don't see why m2 b1 LH should be in 2 layers.

Because for the first four measures, there are two voices in the left hand: the middle arpeggio and the bass, and both of them coincide on that note.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

XiaoMigros

Quote from: Khunjund on June 22, 2022, 03:37:10 PMI don't have a problem with the rolls.
I don't see why they should be there, since they aren't rolled in the original and can easily be avoided.

Quote from: Khunjund on June 22, 2022, 03:37:10 PMWhile I don't think it's impossible to have a Cmaj7(b5) chord structure, I would only write it that way if there was a clear reason to do so (e.g. the presence of a line going G>[Gb]>F). As-is, I believe Cmaj7(#11) is the more likely interpretation, which is why I use F#.
Makes sense, cool

Quote from: Khunjund on June 22, 2022, 03:37:10 PMBecause for the first four measures, there are two voices in the left hand: the middle arpeggio and the bass, and both of them coincide on that note.
Oops my bad, I miscounted and thought it was out of place.

Static

Replacement link:

Just a couple things:
  • m2 RH beat 3: Maybe put the Ab in it's own layer so it's more clear that the C underneath is the melody. Everywhere else it's fine since the melody's on top, but here its ambiguous.
  • m9 RH beat 1: Melody plays F here, not E.

Khunjund

Please stop making lists using hyphens.


Bloop

-m4: There's another Bn in the R.H. an octave above the current one, from the clarinet/flute-y melody.
-m5-6: I hear some extra harmonies in the strings here too (mostly same in m7-8 as well):
You cannot view this attachment.
-Since you intended this piece to be played with pedal, maybe you could add "con pedale" at the start? Also, just for midi playback, you could stop the pedal marking at the last measure before beat 4, so the playback won't hold the notes for the full bar.
-Also, don't forget the instrument name at the start :p

Khunjund

Quote from: Bloop on July 25, 2022, 01:05:59 PMm4: There's another Bn in the R.H. an octave above the current one, from the clarinet/flute-y melody.

I intentionally omitted that one to focus on the string line, and because I find the empty doubled B over doubled C in the bass needlessly harsh.

Quote from: Bloop on July 25, 2022, 01:05:59 PMm5-6: I hear some extra harmonies in the strings here too (mostly same in m7-8 as well):

Done.

Quote from: Bloop on July 25, 2022, 01:05:59 PMSince you intended this piece to be played with pedal, maybe you could add "con pedale" at the start? Also, just for midi playback, you could stop the pedal marking at the last measure before beat 4, so the playback won't hold the notes for the full bar.

It wouldn't fit with how close the systems are, and I'd rather omit it that play around with spacing any further.

Quote from: Bloop on July 25, 2022, 01:05:59 PMAlso, don't forget the instrument name at the start :p

Right, wouldn't want anyone to mistake it for a trumpet part on this website which exclusively hosts piano sheets.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

LeviR.star

Quote from: Khunjund on July 25, 2022, 03:17:03 PMRight, wouldn't want anyone to mistake it for a trumpet part on this website which exclusively hosts piano sheets.

There's no need for that snark, Bloop is only trying to help you. If you'd like some respect out of the updaters, the least you can do is give some back to them.
Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

Bloop

Quote from: Khunjund on July 25, 2022, 03:17:03 PMI intentionally omitted that one to focus on the string line, and because I find the empty doubled B over doubled C in the bass needlessly harsh.
Wouldn't it then make sense to omit the string line instead, since the clarinet has the melody and is more in the foreground?

Quote from: Khunjund on July 25, 2022, 03:17:03 PMIt wouldn't fit with how close the systems are, and I'd rather omit it that play around with spacing any further.
I personally think it still fits, as it doesn't interfere with the measure below that much:
You cannot view this attachment.

If you'd really rather keep those things as is, that's fine too of course. There's just one other tiny thing I noticed: the mf in m8 could be raised a bit, so it's centered with the crescendo before.

Quote from: Khunjund on July 25, 2022, 03:17:03 PMRight, wouldn't want anyone to mistake it for a trumpet part on this website which exclusively hosts piano sheets.
I believe this discussion has happened before, so I won't go too much into it, but site-consistency and clarification for if the sheet is shared outside of NSM are our main reasons to keep the instrument name at the start.

Khunjund

Quote from: Bloop on July 26, 2022, 01:36:04 AMWouldn't it then make sense to omit the string line instead, since the clarinet has the melody and is more in the foreground?

The string line is the interesting one, though, which is why I've included it starting from the F# in the previous measure.

Quote from: Bloop on July 26, 2022, 01:36:04 AMI personally think it still fits, as it doesn't interfere with the measure below that much:
You cannot view this attachment.

Sorry, it still looks wrong to me. I'd really rather have it omitted.

Quote from: Bloop on July 26, 2022, 01:36:04 AMIf you'd really rather keep those things as is, that's fine too of course. There's just one other tiny thing I noticed: the mf in m8 could be raised a bit, so it's centered with the crescendo before.

I've aligned those dynamics.

Quote from: Bloop on July 26, 2022, 01:36:04 AMI believe this discussion has happened before, so I won't go too much into it, but site-consistency and clarification for if the sheet is shared outside of NSM are our main reasons to keep the instrument name at the start.

I honestly just forgot. Whenever I make a new sheet in Finale, I always select "Piano (No Staff Name)". I have been vocal before about my feelings on the site's formatting standards, however.
Please stop making lists using hyphens.

Bloop


Zeta

This submission has been accepted by Bloop.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot