The Great NSM Novel

[Roz~]

You're gonna be the final boss

[MaestroUGC]

No, if I am a Boss, I better be the Bonus Boss that requires you to be level 99999.

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Jerry Deduces

    JaMaHa stood in the center plaza, awaiting the others. Mashi's left wrist was handcuffed to the G-Han statue in the middle of the plaza. His other arm hung free at his side, allowing him to adjust his fashionable sunglasses and fix his hair.

    "Mayor JaMaHa, I formally request to be released," said Mashi.

    JaMaHa sucked air into his cheeks and blew it out slowly.

    "No, Mashi," he replied without turning around, struggling to remain calm. "You've broken several laws, and we need to hold a town meeting to decide what to do with you."

    "So you won't let me go?" said Mashi, sighing.

    "No."

    "What if I tell you where Concerto is?" Mashi said, smiling smugly.

    At the mention of his trusted friend's name, something in JaMaHa snapped. He turned around and pulled his fist back, prepared to strike. Luckily, the other NSMers were just arriving, and SFK and Winter were able to restrain JaMaHa just before he punched the suspect in the face.

    "What did you do with him, you bastard?!" shouted JaMaHa furiously.

    "Ahahahaha," Mashi laughed. "Where's the proof I kidnapped Concerto? I was only going to offer conjecture! Not that you'd need it if you were a halfway competent moderator."

    "Somebody else take this," seethed JaMaHa. "I can't deal with him right now."

    "Mashi," said Slow. "There's one thing I can't understand: Why do you want to destroy NinSheetMusic in the first place?"

    "Yeah," said ETF. "I always got the impression you loved us."

    Mashi let out a derisive snort. "Loved you? On the contrary, darling, I abhor you and the rest of this disgusting forums. My greatest wish is to see it turned to rubble."

    Nebbles was shaking with silent rage. What gave this bastard the right to act so superior and hateful?

    "If you don't like it here, you can always leave," said Winter angrily. "Why make us all suffer when you could choose to never see this place again?"

    Mashi broke into genuinely amused laughter. "You dim-witted moderator. This isn't just about senseless violence. This is about revenge," he clarified, his eyes flashing beneath his fashionable sunglasses.

    "Revenge?!" shouted JaMaHa, turning to face him. "What the hell did we ever do to you to deserve this kind of revenge?!"

    "You are such fools!" laughed Mashi, wiping a tear from his eye with his free hand. "You still have no idea what this is really about! It's enough to make me laugh myself to death!"

    JaMaHa couldn't take it anymore. He shoved through the crowd and punched Mashi square in the jaw. A tooth broke loose from his mouth and shot across the plaza. His fashionable sunglasses also flew off his face, landing and cracking in front of Jub3r7.

    "Jerry!" shouted Mashi suddenly. "Bring me those, now!"

    Jub, however, was staring intently at the fashionable sunglasses. The gears in his mind were turning; something seemed off, but what?

    "These sunglasses," said Jub slowly. "Where did you get them?"

    "That TWG from two years ago, of course!" said Mashi defensively. "Don't you remember? The players were given sunglasses as a thank-you for participating in the program. Now return my property."

    Suddenly, it clicked. Jub immediately looked up, directly at Mashi, eyes shining and mouth corners twitching with the beginnings of a triumphant grin.

    "But this isn't your property, Mashi," said Jub slowly. "These sunglasses' frames are hot pink. Hot pink sunglasses were given out that game... to the Wolf team. You were a Human, and the Human team's commemorative sunglasses were framed in a salient, vogue shade of green-yellow."

    "I remember that..." murmured someone in the crowd.

    "Yeah, I still have my sunglasses..."

    "I accidentally ran mine over with my truck, but they were definitely green..."

    "So that brings me to my next question," said Jub, trembling. "Who are you really?"

    The entire crowd gasped and took a step back, turning their horrified stares to Mashi.

    "Whatever do you mean?" snarled Mashi. "I'm exactly who I've always been."

    "Check his eyes," said Roz suddenly. "If he wants those sunglasses so bad, there's got to be a reason for hiding his eyes."

    "No!" shouted Mashi, sounding panicked. "My--my eyes are simply sensitive to moonlight! This is a violation of privacy--"

    "Don't make me punch you again," growled JaMaHa.

    Jub walked up to Mashi, and looked directly into his eyes. Those eyes looked...different, somehow. Suddenly, he noticed it. The skin around Mashi's eyes was a slightly lighter color than the rest of his dark face. Repulsed but fascinated, Jub rubbed his thumb over the light area, only to have it become lighter still. A dark residue was left on his thumb.

    "Is this... makeup?" said Jub, confused.

    Mashi closed his eyes and began to chuckle. The laughter, tiny at first, started to grow, soon becoming a full-fledged evil laugh. "I was so close. Hah! To think that I was found out by a wimp like  you, of all people!"

    Mashi reached at his neck with his free hand.

    "What is he doing?" whispered ETF nervously.

    "He's... he's..." stammered SFK.

    "He's peeling off his skin!" screamed Nebbles hysterically.

    Mashi was, in fact, peeling off what appeared to be skin, but was actually a very well-made mask. And when the mask came off, everyone gasped in shock at the face that was underneath.

    "MaestroUGC?" said Jub incredulously.

The man behind the mask smiled pleasantly.

    "Oh, absolutely."

[MaestroUGC]

Now that's more like it.

[K-NiGhT]

OHHHH SHIIIIT

[Mashi]

i never expected this at all!!!

not even from all the conversations we were having

Also:

    "I accidentally ran mine over with my truck, but they were definitely green..."

who said this which one of you nsmers are going to be lynched this phase???

[Greg]

ahahahaha oh my god this is brilliant

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
The Great Arrogant King

    "Maestro?!" said Slow, completely taken aback. "What the hell are you doing? Mashi was supposed to be...that is, I..."

    "Isn't it obvious?" snarled Maestro. "I'm hijacking your story. I knew about your little plan not to include me, so several days ago I took matters into my own hands."

    Well played, Maestro. Well played.

    "But why not just include yourself in our activities? Show up at my party or something?" cried Winter.

    "I didn't receive an invitation," said Maestro blankly. "You don't just show up at someone's house uninvited."

    "I think a more important moral might be 'YOU DON'T KIDNAP PEOPLE AND TRY TO DESTROY THE CITY!'" screamed ETF.

    "I must have missed that chapter in my etiquette book," said Maestro, frowning. "Either way, I have no good reason for not destroying you all, so I figured 'eh, what the hell?'"

    "What do you mean, 'there's no good reason not to destroy us?!'" said Nebbles furiously.

    Maestro looked at her disdainfully. "Peasants. I am much more accomplished and brilliant than any of you could ever dream to be."

    "You arrogant son of a BITCH!" said SFK angrily. "You don't just say 'eh, what the hell' and destroy an entire CITY!"

    "I do," said Maestro.

    "Oh," said SFK.

    "What I don't understand is how none of us noticed you were Mashi the whole time," said Roz, frowning. "I mean, you weren't even wearing the fashionable sunglasses until after the incident at the Tinychat Bar."

    "Ah, yes," said Maestro. "The mask was a touch too big for me, leaving a noticeable light area between my eyes and the spot that the mask began. So I had to use makeup to fill in the gaps. Unfortunately, when Slow here figured out that 'Mashi' was behind everything, I must admit that I panicked. The excess perspiration around my eyes caused the makeup to run, hence the sunglasses."

    "This guy wears makeup," snickered SFK. "How gay is that?"

    Dude glared at him stonily.

    "Uh, I said 'great,'" said SFK nervously. "How...great...is that. Yeah. Heh."

    "I wouldn't know. I don't wear makeup," said Dude icily.

    "Heh, is it tense in here or what?" said SFK, nervously adjusting his collar.

    "Okay," said JaMaHa, struggling to remain calm. "So you're telling me that you kidnapped Concerto..."

    "And Mashi," Maestro reminded him.

    "...and Mashi..." said JaMaHa, face growing red, "...just because you could?"

    Maestro mulled it over.

    "Well, it sounds a tad mundane when you put it like that, but I suppose that would be accurate," he affirmed.

    "I see," said JaMaHa. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Well, in that case..." JaMaHa glanced over toward Winter and nodded. "...YOUR ASS IS GOING TO JAIL, BUB!" he suddenly screamed.

    "J-jail?" said Maestro, startled. "But why? You peasants don't have that authority."

    "He's not even joking," said Dude incredulously. "He legitimately thinks he's above the law."

    "That's Maestro: our supreme king of arrogance," said Roz grimly.

    Winter and Kefka dragged a limp, confused Maestro away to the sheriff's office. JaMaHa shook his head. "I'll never understand what goes on in that one's head."

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER NINETEEN
A Piece of Blue

"Mayor JaMaHa, backups are due in a half hour and we still haven't found Concerto," said Jub, his voice shaking.

    "What?" said Slow, startled. "It's that late?"

    "Is this...goodbye?"

    "Will the forums be destroyed?"

    "Nobody knows where Concerto is..."

    "OH REARRY!"

    The crowd gasped and turned toward the voice. Shadoninja was walking toward them, squinting, hand on his hip, sticking his lips out. His mushroom hat glistened in the moonlight.

    "You all are overlooking something monumental!" he announced dramatically.

    "Shado!" said JaMaHa, stunned. "Are you saying--that is-- you know where Concerto--?"

    "Not yet! But I think I know someone who does!" said Shado, narrowing his eyes.

    Everyone gasped, then started chattering nervously.

    "Who is he talking about...?"

    "Someone knows where Concerto is..?"

    "You mean there was another person who had a hand in kidnapping Concerto?"

    "Objection!" shouted Shado, pointing a finger outstretched at Nebbles, who was the last to have spoken. She gave a start and looked fearfully at Shado.

"Objection?!" she shrieked.

    "Objection!" declared Shado again. "This person who knows where Concerto was taken was not in on the action!"

    "That doesn't make any sense!" said Slow frustratedly.

    "Hold it!" shouted Shado ferociously. "I haven't finished! This person knows because they were at the scene of the crime when Concerto was taken!"

    "We already saw the video tape of the crime!" said ETF. "There wasn't another person there!"

    "BESIDES," said SFK, "if there WAS another person, wouldn't they have stepped FORWARD to STOP the kidnapping?"

    "Take that!" said Shado triumphantly, and out of nowhere above his head, a giant hologram of the video tape appeared.

    "How is he doing that," said JaMaHa, completely nonplussed.

    "Just go with it," said Dude.

    "Take a look at this still frame!" ordered Shado. "We can clearly see Raymondbl carrying Concerto, with Jub3r7 hiding in the shadows!"

    "So where's this fourth person?" demanded Roz.

    "Right here!" said Shado, grinning, and zoomed in to the ground near Town Hall.

    "That's... the Blue Flower!" gasped Nebbles. "You mean it can see?"

    "I can talk, too!" squeaked a small voice near her feet.

    Nebbles screamed and looked down. "What?! The flower is talking?!"

    "You can call me blue...blueflo..." said the tiny voice, struggling to get the words out. It took a deep breath and said "Blueflower999, or Blue for short. I apologize; I have some trouble with speech."

    "What have you been doing?!" said ETF incredulously. "How are you here?"

    "Raymondbl planted me when he left the first time, to keep an eye on this place," said Blueflower. "He... he said..."

    "Raymondbl did?" interrupted SFK.

    Blueflower sighed. "Don't interrupt me, please. I hate when people interrupt me before I can finish a thought."

    "I'm just gonna..." muttered SFK, and hid behind JaMaHa.

    "I was told to remain silent and observe everything to report back to him," continued Blueflower. "So yes, I was here when Concerto was kidnapped, and I heard them say where they were going to take him."

    The crowd gasped, then cheered. Slow walked forward and plucked the flower out of the ground. The flower floated into the air, glowed brightly, then morphed into a boy.

    "I knew that wasn't a regular flower," muttered Dude.

    "Can you show us where he is?" said Shado. "It's vitally important!"

    The boy nodded. "Follow me."

[MaestroUGC]

What? That's it?

A few lines then I'm just carted off to jail?

What kind of bullsh*t is this! I'm not just some d-list actor who only comes in to p;lay bit parts! I am Maestro, the great and eternal! You do slander to my name by not letting me enjoy my moment more. I expect a full revision of both this chapter and the entire novel up to this point to make up for it.

You have 3 hours.

[blueflower999]

Looks like I have a new favorite character

[SlowPokemon]

What? That's it?

A few lines then I'm just carted off to jail?

What kind of bullsh*t is this! I'm not just some d-list actor who only comes in to p;lay bit parts! I am Maestro, the great and eternal! You do slander to my name by not letting me enjoy my moment more. I expect a full revision of both this chapter and the entire novel up to this point to make up for it.

You have 3 hours.

MAESTRO YOU WEREN'T EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE IN THIS BEFORE YOU HIJACKED MY STORY

LITERALLY IF THE AUTHOR IS SURPRISED BY WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE STORY THERE IS A PROBLEM AND I THINK YOU SHOULD BE CONTENT WITH YOUR BRIEF ESCAPADE

plus if you think about it all of mashi's lines are actually you

[MaestroUGC]

Looks like I have a new favorite character

It's me right?

[SlowPokemon]

CHAPTER TWENTY
The Rescue

    They didn't have far to go. He led them to one of the new apartment buildings which had just been built. Names of the people who would soon move in were posted on a sign outside with their respective room numbers.

    "They said it was room 1408," said Blueflower with certainty.

    "JaMaHa! Do you have clearance for this building?" said Shado.

    JaMaHa nodded. "I have the key. Let's go, guys."

    The crowd ran up the stairs, with Shadoninja leading the pack. "1408 is up on the fourth floor!" called JaMaHa.

    "Affirmative!" shouted Shado.

    The group arrived on the fourth floor and made their way to 1408, the door of which was slightly ajar.

    And there, inside the room, were two people tied to chairs, duct tape covering their mouths. On the left was Mashi, and on the right was none other than the mayor's trusted aide, Concerto No. 20 in D Minor.

    "Yes!" shouted Shado with delight. He ran forward, whipped out a switchblade, and sliced through the ropes binding Concerto in one swift motion. He grabbed Concerto's arm and pulled him up, raising his arm in the air. "TAKE THAT, SLOW! I COMPLETED YOUR CHALLENGE!" he shouted triumphantly.

    Slow gaped at him. "Challenge?"

    "The challenge to find Concerto of course!" said Shado importantly. He put on a pair of shades and said "With that, I'm out of here. Vrooooooooooom!"

    Making a noise like a car engine, he drove through the crowd and down the stairs.

    JaMaHa stared after him, shaking his head. "Why can't we get a few normal people in this town?"

    "Hell if I know," muttered Dude.

    Jub3r7 tearfully walked up to Mashi and untied his wrists, ripping the tape off his mouth.

    "S--Senpai..." he whimpered, and then hugged him, loudly wailing "I MISSED MY BEST FRIEND!"

    "Aww!" gushed everyone--except the mayor. He walked up to Concerto, smiling and shaking his head.

    "Jesus, Concerto. You do have a knack for getting into trouble."

    "That's the last time I drink on the job," said Concerto, rubbing his wrists ruefully.

    "What was that?" said JaMaHa, who hadn't quite heard him.

    "Oh, uh, nothing," said Concerto. He smiled slightly. "Ready to do some backups, buddy?"

    "That's no way to address your mayor, Concerto," laughed JaMaHa. "Supreme Lord JaMaHa will do."

    Suddenly, Mashi stood on top of his chair. "Attention, everyone!!! Are you ready for the last plot twist???"

    "Uh, plot twist?" said Slow uneasily.

    Mashi reached at his neck and ripped off his mask, revealing--himself.

    Everyone stared at him.

    "..."

    Mashi stared back.

    "Well I assumed that if you ever deduced that Maestro was masquerading as me, you would be expecting everyone to be in disguise. And what better disguise than myself??? No one would ever suspect!!!"

    Everyone laughed at the frivolity of the situation, and filed out of the building one by one, ready to go home after a long, stressful day.

    "I wonder who's going to live in that apartment?" said Jub3r7 as he walked out with Mashi and Slow.

    Slow walked up to the sign and squinted. "Room 1408 is someone named... MassiveMayhem."

    "Sounds interesting," said Mashi.

    "I guess we'll have to tell him about who was living in his apartment before he was!" laughed Slow.

    Roz laughed, passing them. "That'll be one hell of a story!"

    Yes it will, Roz. Yes it will.

[SlowPokemon]

EPILOGUE
An Update

Three weeks later...

    "So you're saying that you never even checked out any of those books?" said Slow incredulously.

    "No, that must have been Maestro that you met at the library," said Mashi, sighing.

    "I can't believe I had entire conversations with that man and didn't realize it the whole time," said Slow regretfully.

    "How's he doing, anyway?" said Mashi curiously.

    "He's absolutely raving," said Winter grimly, who had approached them. "He keeps going on about more screen time or something. Can barely get a cohesive word out of him, but if we hand him a blank score sheet, he writes the most beautiful symphonies."

    "Fascinating," said Slow thoughtfully.

    "And JaMaHa has been keeping up with backups, right?" said Mashi sharply.

    "Now Mashi," sighed Winter. "Have a little more faith in your mayor, won't you?"

    Suddenly, all three felt a wave of energy pass over them.

    â€What was that†said Mashi.

    Slow paused.

    â€Mashi, did you justâ€| he began, then shrieked. â€I’m doing it too!â€

    â€Oh, hehe,†said Winter nervously. â€That’s JaMaHa’s new forums update. I think it was going to cause a few adverse effects, but I didn’t know that it would|’

    â€JAMAHA, PREPARE FOR MY WRATH!†screamed Mashi, running for Town Hall. Slow laughed and ran after him.

FIN