[GB] Pokémon Red/Blue/Yellow - "Surf Theme" (Replacement) by Zunawe

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Pokémon
Game: Pokémon Red/Blue/Yellow
Console: Game Boy
Title: Surf Theme
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Zunawe


Replacement Information:
Links to Existing Sheet: MUS | MIDI | PDF
Replacement Type: Challenge (new arranger)

[attachment deleted by admin]

[Zunawe]

Olimar took a look at this a long time ago because the arrangement project died, and nothing really happened with it.

[Olimar12345]

As I recall, it needed some work.

-Site URL should read: http://www.ninsheetmusic.org/

-Add a G# under that E on beat 1 measure 2 RH

-Rather than have a two octave jump from measure 2 to 3, how about add that last eighth note F in the LH to the RH with its B? That'll leave an eighth rest for the LH to make that jump with.

-The lower G in the LH of measure 17 needs to be raised to a B

-Measure 7's LH up beats need some work: Chords on beats 2&3 should be just A, and chords on beats 5&6 should be A and G#

-Measure 8's LH up beats need some work: Chords on beats 2&3 should be G# and A, and chords on beats 5&6 should be G# and E

-Measure 7's LH up beats need some work: Chords on beats 2&3 should be just G#, and the last sixteenth note should be E and G# (like the previous one)


I'll post more once these corrections are made.

[Zunawe]

-Url Fixed
-Done
-Assuming you meant the G (final eighth note in left hand)
-Done
-Reset chords (also assuming you meant 7, 8, & 9)

[Bespinben]

Good submissions like these deserve prompt feedback.

I think it's safe to say this is no longer Dahan's arrangement. Knowing you don't have to work under that pretense, why not go full throttle, like so?



A.) In your sheet, you have these voices drop out suddenly, which, this being a 3-voice composition, is a no-no. Now you might say "Olimar told me to!", but for what reason? It was to make the jump more manageable in the LH (a perfectly valid reason, not bashing on Olimar). However, since you have the bass line moved an octave lower from the original in m.3+, why not do the same for m. 1-2? If you do that, there isn't that gapping jump anymore, and you also can play those bass and alto notes without overlap, thus preserving the 3-voice continuity.

B.) Again, why transpose the alto line an octave lower when you have it at the normal octave in m. 11-18? Consistency will prevent most of these issues. Instead, play the alto line as is and the bass an octave lower (as you have already been doing), and it creates a smooth texture along with an aesthetically pleasing notation (as well as preserves the 3-voice continuity, another bonus). Also, do notice the articulations I added.

C.) Just a simple case of a transcription error. Alto and Melody are unis. on D; bass on E. Even if you didn't listen to the song, with the C# and D minor 9th clash in your present sheet, that's already a warning sign of something amiss.

*PERSONAL OPINION NOT OFFICIAL NSM STANDARD -- please please please, if you don't have any good reason, try to stick with the hypermeter for the measure layout, which for this song is 4 measures per system. Indenting the 2 measure pickup further in is perfectly fine (though, personally, I like to fill in the gap with performance notes or other info befitting the piece)

[Zunawe]

I have no objections to these changes. Just a couple questions though.

- In measure 7, would it be preferable to leave out the upbeats in the right hand, or put in an octave? Same goes for 9.
- Olimar, did you mean to change measure 8 to A and F#? Because that sounds quite a bit better to me.
- After fitting your articulations, Bespinben, I kept the same pattern in the left hand through the second part excepting the last three notes of the piece. Is there a need to change that measure or the right hand's articulations?
- How would one increase the indent of the first line? I like to stick with blocks of 4 measures (typically) if I can, but I'd rather not spread the music, which is why I split it in the first place.

[Olimar12345]

Def G# and A.

[Bespinben]

*In m. 7 and 9, the alto voice is in unison with the bass voice. Since we are treating the bass voice to be an octave lower and the alto to be at pitch, it should look like this:
(also note the transcription fixes at m.8 [actually is G# and F#, contrary to Olimar])

Def G# and A.

^this (arranged in the above fashion, it has the more consonant major 7th interval as opposed to a minor 2nd)

- After fitting your articulations, Bespinben, I kept the same pattern in the left hand through the second part excepting the last three notes of the piece. Is there a need to change that measure or the right hand's articulations?

Yes. There should be a slur connecting those 3 notes.

- How would one increase the indent of the first line? I like to stick with blocks of 4 measures (typically) if I can, but I'd rather not spread the music, which is why I split it in the first place.

Use Page Layout Tool, and drag the handles at the left end of the first system however far you'd like.

[Zunawe]

Alright. Should be updated.

[Bespinben]

You're almost done! In fact, I would have accepted already if you hadn't shown interest in my peculiar measure distribution methods. You probably noticed by creating such a large indent, an ungainly gap is created in the sheet. NSM doesn't allow illustrations, so what do you do? Give it some bazinga of course!



There are better quotes out there ("I like shorts!"), but see what I mean? Immerse the player! Find a nostalgic quote and fill in that gap! This is video game sheet music after all.
Alternatively, you can also use this space for elaborate performance notes. I did this for my Super Mario Bros. 3 "Athletic" replacement.

ONE LAST THING ~ I noticed you played around with the octaves of the bass line in m. 1-2. Look what I did on beat 2 of measure 2 in my picture above. If you voice it like this, you get that nice "sol la ti do" whammy. Very good bass cadence.

[Zunawe]

Acceptably nostalgic and fitting?

[Bespinben]

Oh that's perfect. Yes yes yes.
And here I spent a good hour trying to find a decent quote from trainer battles along Pallet Town to Cinnabar Island, and for what? XD

Try to make the left end of the quote align with the left end of the piano staves of the 2nd system. Also, you can make a square border in MS Paint and then import the file via graphics tool.

[Zunawe]

Can do square border in Finale. Highlight text box -> Text -> Standard Frame (click it) -> Line Thickness. You have to set it to something tiny. This one is at 0.01. Inset Text controls distance from text to border.

[Bespinben]

Ah you're right! I barely mess with that method because it sometimes seems I can't get the borders as symmetric as I'd like (#OCDprobs).

I promise this will be accepted as soon as this is done:

the midi and pdf don't mean a thing if tha MUS 'aint got that swing.

While the PDF is fine, the MUS cannot recreate the same file currently. The idea is that the MUS should act as a mother file for all the other files. So, you'll need to fix the spacing issue in the MUS. Kinda lame I know. This policy is a carryover of why we don't accept PDF's made in Sibelius or Musescore.

What you can do though is make the quote in 3 lines instead of 2 lines. That should work.

[Zunawe]

So, I use Finale 2014's export function to create my files. It saves as .musx, and you can export to a .mus, .mid, and .pdf, which is what I do. It sounds like the .mus export was silly. I suppose a fix could be to open my .mus in Notepad and fix it there? After I download Notepad.

It's getting late here, so I'll do that tomorrow afternoon.