[DELETED] [Wii] Super Mario Galaxy 2 - "Starshine Beach Galaxy" by Oasis

Started by Zeta, September 20, 2015, 06:05:54 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Super Mario
Game: Super Mario Galaxy 2
Console: Nintendo Wii
Title: Starshine Beach Galaxy
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Oasis

Oasis

"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

HeartofChaos

Oh yeah! Galaxy 2! I've compared your music to others submitted on ninsheet and found some problems.
*You don't have the tempo number, you only have allegro.
*Some notes overlap each other so it is hard to see like at measure 23, 24, 27, 28, 31, 32, and 35.
*You also missed some other notes that might be hard to hear with all the other instruments.
I suggest you try listening to the music slowed down. Hope this helps!
If all mankind were to disappear, the world would regenerate back to the rich state of equilibrium that existed ten thousand years ago. If insects were to vanish, the environment would collapse into chaos.

HeartofChaos

*Also on the 2nd and 3rd pages, you should replace "Title" with "Starshine Beach Galaxy".
If all mankind were to disappear, the world would regenerate back to the rich state of equilibrium that existed ten thousand years ago. If insects were to vanish, the environment would collapse into chaos.

Altissimo

Oh boy. There's a few things to say about this:
-BEAMING!!!! No but like seriously this is one of the more  important things to mention. You've got a consistent dotted quarter-dotted quarter-quarter thing going on in the bass. The problem is that this doesn't show the beginning of beat 3. In 4/4 time you should ideally be showing the beginning of beats 1 and 3 at all times (excepting very obvious beat amounts like dotted halves and whole notes). So this would be better off as dotted quarter-eighth tied quarter-quarter. Not only is there that, but in figures like for example m. 4 (really any measure with syncopation like that), you need to show beat 3, so instead of quarter-eighth-quarter you should have quarter-eighth-eighth tied eighth. This is something you'll need to fix in most of the melody.
-The 32nd notes in the melody would be better off as grace notes.
-At measure 23, and at recurring intervals after that, your layers collide. They shouldn't. I think it's just a matter of selecting a note and hitting the L key in Finale (at least that's how it is in Notepad) to change the beaming. The ties in these measures should also go under the notes. (HeartofChaos commented on this too, I see. I've been ninjad)
-The dotted eighths you have notated in m. 38 through 46 are actually triplets (3 eighths per quarter).
-Finally, there's a LOT more going on in your bass than you have written. I'm not quite sure what all is there, but it's definitely more than just a bass line!

Oasis

Thank you guys! I love you guys very much! Will update soon!
<3
"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

Oasis

@Altissimo: There were a couple of problems I encountered. I currently have finale notepad and I don't think Finale has the grace note option.
And when I tried pressing L, nothing happened. I have the first sets of notes on layer 1 and put the overlapping set of notes on layer 3. Not sure if this is the reason why it's not working.
That's all and thank you for taking your time to check this. I greatly appreciate it.
"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

TheMarioPianist

Quote from: Oasis on September 20, 2015, 06:55:17 PM@Altissimo: There were a couple of problems I encountered. I currently have finale notepad and I don't think Finale has the grace note option.
And when I tried pressing L, nothing happened. I have the first sets of notes on layer 1 and put the overlapping set of notes on layer 3. Not sure if this is the reason why it's not working.
That's all and thank you for taking your time to check this. I greatly appreciate it.
Give me a second, I'll look at/fix up these things.
"I'm always here to help. Except when I'm not." ~Latios212

"If you're interested in 'balancing' work and pleasure, stop trying to balance them. Instead make your work more pleasurable." ~Donald J. Trump

Transcriber
M-updater
Piano player

Oasis

@TheMarioPianist: Thank you very much and greatly appreciated!
"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

TheMarioPianist

Ok, finally done! Whew! Anyway, fixed up everything on Altissimo's list except for:

Quote from: Altissimo on September 20, 2015, 06:25:02 PM-Finally, there's a LOT more going on in your bass than you have written. I'm not quite sure what all is there, but it's definitely more than just a bass line!
I didn't get a chance to check this out, and I don't have the time to investigate this now. You'll have to look into that.

I also implemented HeartofChaos' changes as well. I also did these things:

-more dynamics
-removed staccatos on eighth notes (they are redundant, kind of)
-added a working repeat sign

Take a look at some of that bass stuff again. Heck, maybe even see if you can incorporate any of that ambient stuff into the first 4 measures of the right hand. This piece could go places.

[.mid] [.mus] [.pdf] [.musx]
"I'm always here to help. Except when I'm not." ~Latios212

"If you're interested in 'balancing' work and pleasure, stop trying to balance them. Instead make your work more pleasurable." ~Donald J. Trump

Transcriber
M-updater
Piano player

Oasis

"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

Oasis

"I set my ATM card's number to "0001" because I'm number one!"
-Karma

Olimar12345

Looks like the title doesn't carry over to the other pages, as they only say "title." Also there is a rhythm grouping error that persists throughout this arrangements", in which a quarter note ends up on the up-beat of two (mm. 5, RH for example). A good rule of thumb is to always show beat three in 4/4 time.
Visit my site: VGM Sheet Music by Olimar12345 ~ Quality VGM sheet music available for free!

Latios212

Nice start! I think measure 5 should look something like this:

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Note changes to note beaming, articulation, timing, and note durations.
My arrangements and YouTube channel!

Quote from: Dudeman on February 22, 2016, 10:16:37 AM
who needs education when you can have WAIFUS!!!!!

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turtle

TheMarioPianist

#14
Quote from: Olimar12345 on September 20, 2015, 09:20:28 PMLooks like the title doesn't carry over to the other pages, as they only say "title." Also there is a rhythm grouping error that persists throughout this arrangements", in which a quarter note ends up on the up-beat of two (mm. 5, RH for example). A good rule of thumb is to always show beat three in 4/4 time.
Derp, I'm an idiot. I forgot those ones, Oasis. Where that happens, change the quarter to an eighth, put an eighth rest immediately after, and get rid of the staccato on the note. Sorry!

Edit: If you ignore the first line, the notes you have the change are each staccato note in both the first and second measure of each line from line 2 up until the triplet area.
"I'm always here to help. Except when I'm not." ~Latios212

"If you're interested in 'balancing' work and pleasure, stop trying to balance them. Instead make your work more pleasurable." ~Donald J. Trump

Transcriber
M-updater
Piano player