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[NDS] WarioWare: Touched! - "Ashley's Song" by BrainyLucario

Started by Zeta, April 04, 2018, 12:50:42 PM

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BrainyLucario

When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

BrainyLucario

When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

Libera

Right as I said I would on Discord I went through the sheet this morning and I've some edits.  You're free to use the file I made by the way.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/kava1fqxoki3xz5/AshleysSongyLucario%20%28Libera%20edit%29.mus?dl=1

Here's a sort-of list of the changes I made.  If you have any questions be sure to ask.  Keep in mind that regarding notes I haven't gone through it that thoroughly, I was mostly focusing on other issues.

-Changed measure distribution to make more of last page.  (Also some of it was a little scrunched up anyway).
-Bars 23-24 changed D#s to Ebs.
-Bars 19-20 changed Fns to E#s.
-Actually in general there are quite a few places where I've made enharmonic changes.
-There are two measures missing near the end. I've added them in (they just sound like an echo of the previous two bars to me but might be worth a double check.
-Added dynamics in various places.
-Bars 49-51 had some wrong notes.  Bar 51 beat 1 is a D7 chord and the chord in bar 51 is an F chord  (dominant of Bb minor).
-Something funny was going on with the lyrics for me so I got rid of them and input them again.  The important thing with the lyrics is you shouldn't write Ashley as A - shley.  Ash is one syllable, the next is ley.

BrainyLucario

Sweet. Sorry I didn't get to this sooner. I moved and am just getting settled in. I'll update it right away
When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

BrainyLucario

When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

Brassman388

I didn't know we could do stuff with a voice staff. That's pretty cool.

And it's a cool tune as well, easily able to get stuck in your head.

But as always, a couple more things.

The direction for swing could be as simple as . Then when the straight section comes in at m. 36, then you can have just the text "straight." No need for the eighth note at the end of it. Then same thing at m. 52 when going back into swing. When you're layering expressive text or metronome text, always have them side to side, not stacked on top of each other like you have it in the first measure.

Also, when you're dealing with an accompaniment part for piano, you want to reduce the soloist line by at least an additional 25%. This is only for the accompaniment part, which is what we're looking at. The soloist gets a part with just her staff on it.

Also, since you're not dealing with just one performer, rehearsal markings are kinda nice. Those do stack on top of everything else, so make sure you have enough room between each system.

One last thing. Go though once more and check for small things like this:








Notice how there are missing rests? One last check wouldn't hurt.

That's all I got so far. I'll go though once more when you update the files.

BrainyLucario

Oh sweet. Thanks a bunch for the feedback brassman, I'm using notepad so I might need some help with the words and markings and whatnot but I can go ahead and fix the rest issue!
When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

Brassman388

I'll give it a go later today and see if you's guys like those changes.

BrainyLucario

I've updated the rest part and fixed a nasty three quarter rest section on the last page.
When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

Brassman388

So I had to start from scratch, but that's okay. It was a good workout.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/j1cqmuiymginzu7/Ashley%27s%20Song.mus?dl=0

There are a couple of other things I changed because it made sense.

One last thing you could do is make the piano part a little more arranged away from the vocal line since there's some cool stuff. Be creative with the arranging and don't be shy to try out some new things. You got most of the work done, now it's time to have fun with it.

BrainyLucario

Are you referring to the non swing section or the entire piece? Because the only parts i can see that could potentially be improved without obstructing playability is that section
also updated files
When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.

Libera

Quote from: Brassman388 on September 15, 2018, 02:51:57 PMOne last thing you could do is make the piano part a little more arranged away from the vocal line since there's some cool stuff. Be creative with the arranging and don't be shy to try out some new things. You got most of the work done, now it's time to have fun with it.

Arrangements for being put on the site are strictly solo-piano arrangements so the piece has to be playable with only the piano (the vocal line is just there for flavour).  We had a conversation about this with Maelstrom and that was what he said.

Brassman388

Oh, well, nevermind then.

There were a few other nitpicky things that I will get to sometime before the week ends.

So don't go nowhere.

Maelstrom

Also do something about the lyric size. It's way too small to read now.

BrainyLucario

When given the choice between adulting and music, choose music every time.