[3DS] Super Mario 3D Land - "Snow Mountain" by LeviR.star

Started by Zeta, October 10, 2020, 03:16:33 PM

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Zeta

Submission Information:

Series: Super Mario
Game: Super Mario 3D Land
Console: Nintendo 3DS
Title: Snow Mountain
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: LeviR.star

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LeviR.star





I've been dreading the day I'd finish this...

Look, I'm absolutely sick of looking at this sheet. What started out as a simple arrangement I had confidence in went to pot starting around measure 10. From there, it was a mess of inversions, crummy octave placement, and chords I just couldn't pick out, let alone write correctly. Eventually, I re-transcribed the chords in the middle of the sheet verbatim, because I'm not going to pretend I have the right judgement to determine how they ought to be notated. I didn't know before why no one had attempted this sheet before, but I do now.

If your advice is for me to start over fresh and get a new perspective, just know that it won't help me at this point. I've been doing that ever since I started this arrangement and now I need help by being pointed out the specifics. Thank you.
Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

LeviR.star

Quote from: Zeila on October 10, 2020, 10:02:12 PMI don't have much to say about the sheet because I don't feel like checking it over in depth right now, but I noticed a few things
  • I think that you could put it on 2 pages instead of 3 where each page has 5 systems
  • m10 beat 3 LH the D# sounds like it should be B instead
  • m18 beat 3 RH the G sounds like a staccato eighth note with nothing on beat 3.25 instead of having an F# there
  • m25 beat 3.5 I think you should add a G an octave below the one you already have
  • m26-27 RH I think it is worth adding the bell part to the RH here

Moving these here from over in my Personal Arrangements thread.
Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

SlowPokemon

Right now in m. 6, the trill looks like it would be played G-flat to A-flat. Make it a trill on G-natural, with a little F-sharp grace note beforehand and another one right after in parentheses to make it clear which notes are on the trill.

I always wondered if anyone would be brave enough to arrange this track.
Quote from: Tobbeh99 on April 21, 2016, 02:56:11 PM
Fuck logic, that shit is boring, lame and does not always support my opinions.

LeviR.star

Addressed and fixed all five of Zeila's comments.

Quote from: SlowPokemon on October 12, 2020, 06:44:18 AMRight now in m. 6, the trill looks like it would be played G-flat to A-flat. Make it a trill on G-natural, with a little F-sharp grace note beforehand and another one right after in parentheses to make it clear which notes are on the trill.

I can understand why the G-flat would be misleading (I originally wrote it that way to avoid the F-natural) but wouldn't an F-sharp work just the same for the trill? There's no G-sharp in the key signature and I would assume the performer would know to go up just a half step.

Files updated, also waiting on Slow's response.
Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

LeviR.star

Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

Static

Sorry for the wait on this one!
  • m10 LH beat 3: I think you should put a D# above the B and get rid of the F#, to show the resolution of the E in previous chord. By having the chord still be 3 notes (B-D#-A), it still sounds just as light as before.
  • You might want to put a dynamic change at m11, like mezzoforte (and make m3 mezzopiano).
  • I know I went over this measure before in Discord, but after listening again, I hear m11 LH more like this:
  • m10 LH beat 4.5: This sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
  • m13 LH beat 2.5: This also sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
  • m13 LH beat 3.5: I hear an F# under the G#.
  • m13 LH beat 4.5: I don't hear the A.
  • m15 LH beat 1.5: I hear an A above the G.
  • m16 LH beat 4: This also sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
  • m18 RH beat 3: I hear this as four 16th notes (G-F-D-B) rather than an 8th and two 16ths.
  • m27 RH: You might want to consider putting the flute trill there since it's a more active part than the chimes. Up to you though.

LeviR.star

    Quote from: Static on November 14, 2020, 02:12:39 PM
    • m10 LH beat 3: I think you should put a D# above the B and get rid of the F#, to show the resolution of the E in previous chord. By having the chord still be 3 notes (B-D#-A), it still sounds just as light as before.
    • You might want to put a dynamic change at m11, like mezzoforte (and make m3 mezzopiano).
    • I know I went over this measure before in Discord, but after listening again, I hear m11 LH more like this:
    • m10 LH beat 4.5: This sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
    • m13 LH beat 2.5: This also sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
    • m13 LH beat 3.5: I hear an F# under the G#.
    • m13 LH beat 4.5: I don't hear the A.
    • m15 LH beat 1.5: I hear an A above the G.
    • m16 LH beat 4: This also sounds like it should be long instead of staccato.
    • m18 RH beat 3: I hear this as four 16th notes (G-F-D-B) rather than an 8th and two 16ths.
    • m27 RH: You might want to consider putting the flute trill there since it's a more active part than the chimes. Up to you though.

    - that's a good idea; done
    - did that, and make a few other dynamic adjustments
    - should the bottom of that chord on beat 3.5 be a C or an E?
    - I'll put a slur there
    - I think we'd be overestimating the average performer by asking that to be held longer
    - got it
    - that's fine. would you like that F# to be added in there, like I just did?
    - got that too
    - same case as with m. 13 LH beat 2.5, four bullet points up
    - that F isn't actually there, Zeila corrected me before. It is present in the Super Mario 3D World arrangement, though
    - I think since we've already used the trill, I'll opt with the chimes, also because they're easier to play over a longer period

    Files fixed.
    Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

    Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

    Static

    Quote from: LeviR.star on November 14, 2020, 05:05:56 PM- should the bottom of that chord on beat 3.5 be a C or an E?
    Either is fine, but I heard a C. E might be easier to play.

    Quote from: LeviR.star on November 14, 2020, 05:05:56 PM- that's fine. would you like that F# to be added in there, like I just did?
    Yep, looks good

    Quote from: LeviR.star on November 14, 2020, 05:05:56 PM- that F isn't actually there, Zeila corrected me before. It is present in the Super Mario 3D World arrangement, though
    I hear it in this version too, although its less clear because the attack on those notes is very soft compared the more crisp attacks in 3D World.

    Everything else looks great

    Maelstrom

    -LH m21 b2 D is an octave lower, and b2.5 is nearly impossible to hear but I think I'm hearing a 2nd there - the top note being a G, not an A.
    -LH m23 b2.5 - I hear a 2nd here, bottom note is a B.

    Might I encourage you to not beam over rests? Up to you, but I think it would a lot cleaner, especially in m1/2 and 17.

    Everything else looks fine.

    LeviR.star

    Quote from: Static on November 25, 2020, 09:17:50 AMEither is fine, but I heard a C. E might be easier to play.

    I concur; this would work well, as the same chord plays in the next measure on beat 1.5.

    Quote from: Static on November 25, 2020, 09:17:50 AMI hear it in this version too, although its less clear because the attack on those notes is very soft compared the more crisp attacks in 3D World.
    Everything else looks great

    Ehh, I'm still not convinced. Listening to this extra carefully in AudioStretch, I hear no F whatsoever. Agree to disagree?

    Quote from: Maelstrom on November 25, 2020, 11:29:39 AM-LH m21 b2 D is an octave lower, and b2.5 is nearly impossible to hear but I think I'm hearing a 2nd there - the top note being a G, not an A.

    As long as you think that low D can be played fine, I can make both of these changes.

    Quote from: Maelstrom on November 25, 2020, 11:29:39 AM-LH m23 b2.5 - I hear a 2nd here, bottom note is a B.

    Ew, a minor 2nd. But noted.

    Quote from: Maelstrom on November 25, 2020, 11:29:39 AMMight I encourage you to not beam over rests? Up to you, but I think it would a lot cleaner, especially in m1/2 and 17.

    I'll gladly accept permission to break those beams manually, and I'm relieved you said something about it.

    Files fixed.
    Check out my Youtube channel for remixes and original music! LeviR.star's Remixes

    Also check out my piano arrangements here on my PA thread! LeviR.star's Arrangements

    Static

    Quote from: LeviR.star on November 25, 2020, 11:09:37 PMEhh, I'm still not convinced. Listening to this extra carefully in AudioStretch, I hear no F whatsoever. Agree to disagree?
    Alright, sounds fine to me then. I have nothing more to say on this piece, so I'll approve

    Maelstrom

    Quote from: LeviR.star on November 25, 2020, 11:09:37 PMI'll gladly accept permission to break those beams manually, and I'm relieved you said something about it.
    dont worry youll never need my permission to break 8th beams over rests

    accept

    Zeta

    This submission has been accepted by Maelstrom.

    ~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot