Cashwarrior1's Color Sheets

[cashwarrior1]

So I have a sheet for a new game:

Halo: Combat Evolved
On a Pale Horse
[musx] [mus] [midi] [pdf]

And a replacement
Pokémon Black and White
White Forest
[musx] [mus] [midi] [pdf]

[Kricketune54]

Only comment I have for White Forest is that the RH note in 27 should tie over to 28. 

As for Halo, the credits should be to Bungie, Microsoft.  The song you arranged is actually supposed to be called "Pale Rider" (source: https://vgmdb.net/album/29393, as "Behold a Pale Horse" is actually the Halo 3 version of the tune (see video and source https://vgmdb.net/album/5683.

[cashwarrior1]

Only comment I have for White Forest is that the RH note in 27 should tie over to 28. 

Added

White Forest
[musx] [mus] [midi] [pdf]

As for Halo, the credits should be to Bungie, Microsoft.  The song you arranged is actually supposed to be called "Pale Rider" (source: https://vgmdb.net/album/29393, as "Behold a Pale Horse" is actually the Halo 3 version of the tune (see video and source https://vgmdb.net/album/5683.

The soundtrack you linked is the anniversary edition of Halo: Combat Evolved, which changed all the original titles and changed the arrangements based on the choices of the arrangers. The Halo 3 version of the tune is called Behold a Pale Horse while the Halo 1 version is called On a Pale Horse (in addition, it adds another 3 minutes of music that I did not notate). The soundtrack for Halo: Combat Evolved is credited to Martin O'Donnell and Michael Salvatori and lists all the original names of each track.

[Kricketune54]

Oh my mistake regarding Pale Horse's composer info.  I missed that both the vgmdb soundtracks I found when typing "combat evolved" in the search were the remaster.

As for notes on the song, I was wondering if you were omitting an E in the repeating rhythm that starts at m5 in the LH.  I hear an E on beat 2 but looking at the RH I can understand that the hands would be right next to each other

[cashwarrior1]

I am omitting that E, though if people think it should be there, then I can add it in (along with the others of the same kind)

[Latios212]

White Forest

First of all, thank you for doing this one

Main thing I want to ask is, have you experimented with potentially including some notes/rhythms from the (I think it's a marimba)? Some places sound a bit empty when the melody is playing the same rhythm as the left hand chords, like in the beginning. I don't think that voice necessarily meshes very well but it would help with the motion if you wrote in notes for (for example) beats 1.5-2 in the first measure. If this ends up getting too cluttery or sounds bad that's fine, but I think it's something to think about.

Regarding your slur markings, I personally don't find slur/phrase markings that extend over entire systems to be super helpful. I think I'd only tend to use them here when showing a lead-in to the next phrase like at the end of m. 20/24. For those parts, another way to differentiate the phrases would be to break the beam in m. 20 and make beat 3 an eighth rest in m. 24. What you have right now though is fine, though, so your choice.

Also, you might want to reconsider if you want the slurs over staccatos or if it'd be clearer to just leave those phrases as staccato.

Other stuff at a first glance:
- Shota Kageyama
- You don't need a forward repeat bar at the beginning
- Slur your grace notes?
- When you have two eighth rests on beat 3-3.5, it should be a quarter rest. This goes for all the measures
- You might want to put the "etc." in m. 4 below the LH, or use a simile instead in m. 5, since right now it's a bit unclear what it's referring to. (Presumably the articulations in the LH chords)
- I was going to comment on the mordent in m. 6... but it actually does alternate B-C#-B instead of using the mixolydian Cn like the rest of the section! Interesting.
- Any reason why m. 18 LH is in two layers? Seems like it might just be simpler to keep it in one like everywhere else

(Note to self: only checked the melody so far, didn't look at the chords yet)

[cashwarrior1]

Main thing I want to ask is, have you experimented with potentially including some notes/rhythms from the (I think it's a marimba)? Some places sound a bit empty when the melody is playing the same rhythm as the left hand chords, like in the beginning. I don't think that voice necessarily meshes very well but it would help with the motion if you wrote in notes for (for example) beats 1.5-2 in the first measure. If this ends up getting too cluttery or sounds bad that's fine, but I think it's something to think about.

Yeah I had considered doing that when I first arranged but I think it would sound better with a simple score.

- You don't need a forward repeat bar at the beginning
- Slur your grace notes?

I keep forgetting to do that oof

- Any reason why m. 18 LH is in two layers? Seems like it might just be simpler to keep it in one like everywhere else

Well it was because the bass holds a quarter note while the strings still did staccato. Though if it's better for it all to be held, I can change that.

Updated.

[Bloop]

On a Pale Horse looks pretty good already! Notes all sound good to me. Also damn, the youtube link you listed is old :p Here's a few things I noticed (mostly suggestions):
-If you want, you could beam the 6/4 time signatures as 6+6 eighths (instead of 2+2+2+2+2+2), so the division between the six beats is a bit clearer. You could also change 5/4 to 6+4 eighths, 4/4 to 4+4 eighths and 2/4 to just 4 eighths (though this last one is not as necessary)
-m.11: The mp covers the staccato in the L.H.
-m.26: I think I prefer one of these two notations for the L.H., but what you have is possible too. Just a suggestion:
You cannot view this attachment.
-m.34: Have you considered arranging the higher strings that come in here in the R.H. instead of what you have currently? Right now, there's not really a difference between this part and m.26, except being a fourth lower.
-m.47: I don't think you should include the 'let ring' marking here, as there's just a short reverb at the end instead of a held note.

[cashwarrior1]

-m.34: Have you considered arranging the higher strings that come in here in the R.H. instead of what you have currently? Right now, there's not really a difference between this part and m.26, except being a fourth lower.

I did consider doing that but I realized that notating the string part would require me to abandon the current rh part. I also feel that compositionally for a piano performance it makes more sense for it to just be a repeat than to try adding in the upper string part (also if I were to use the lh to play all that part by itself, I think it'd be more difficult than it needs to be).

Updated.

[Bloop]

I did consider doing that but I realized that notating the string part would require me to abandon the current rh part. I also feel that compositionally for a piano performance it makes more sense for it to just be a repeat than to try adding in the upper string part (also if I were to use the lh to play all that part by itself, I think it'd be more difficult than it needs to be).

I actually meant it as omitting the current R.H. and replacing it with the higher strings, but it's possible that that'll make the part lose the momentum as it's more legato and less punchy than the current R.H.

Either way, I'll abloopve of this one! I've taken the liberty to replace the file in the Project Folder, but don't forget to update those files too!

[Latios212]

White Forest

Yeah I had considered doing that when I first arranged but I think it would sound better with a simple score.

Sounds goooood, it's also really easy to play this way haha

Well it was because the bass holds a quarter note while the strings still did staccato. Though if it's better for it all to be held, I can change that.

Alright, that's fine then, I definitely hear it!

One last thing I wonder if it may just be best to write in the harmony in the second chord in m. 10/18 anyway for consistency - the chords move a bit in the original but as you have it right now it just looks like an omitted note. Up to you

Having said that last comment I will approve~

[cashwarrior1]

One last thing I wonder if it may just be best to write in the harmony in the second chord in m. 10/18 anyway for consistency - the chords move a bit in the original but as you have it right now it just looks like an omitted note. Up to you

Ah yeah that'd probably be better. Updated (and put in the folder)

[Static]

White Forest

• The rhythm in m1/3 RH should be beamed across like in the LH (and in other spots in the RH). In Finale, when you add grace notes to groups of 4 8th notes like this, the beam is broken for some reason, so you have to press "/" while highlighting the 8th on beat 2.5 to create the beam again.
• The grace notes at the beginning of m1/3 RH start on F instead of Eb. There should only be two grace notes.
• The chord on beat 4 of m2/4/6/14 should have a C# in it, but I guess there's not really a good way to add it with this voicing. I guess it's fine to leave it out.
• The chords in m8/16 LH are different. I'm hearing this:
  
• m10 LH beat 2.5: There's an extra Bb that appears in this chord (Cbmaj7) - so you could move the Gb up to Bb just for this chord. This happens again in m18 too but I'd keep it as you have written because of the bass.

• I was going to comment on the mordent in m. 6... but it actually does alternate B-C#-B instead of using the mixolydian Cn like the rest of the section! Interesting.
  

  So, because of this, I'd actually suggest putting a courtesy natural sign above this mordent. Click on the Articulation Tool, click on that note with the mordent, click "Create..." > look for "Symbols", then select "Main..." > look for the small # sign (in my version of Finale, it's listed as number 73) > Select > look for "Positioning" > uncheck all boxes on the left and make sure it says "Manually" under the Position drop-down box > OK > Select > drag above mordent.
  
  Spoiler

  

  [close]
  But if you'd rather not do that, you could leave it. I just think it might be more clear since there's quite a lot of C naturals in this piece.
• m28 LH beat 2.5: This middle chord is actually another Absus4 (Ab-Db-Eb).

[cashwarrior1]

So, because of this, I'd actually suggest putting a courtesy natural sign above this mordent. Click on the Articulation Tool, click on that note with the mordent, click "Create..." > look for "Symbols", then select "Main..." > look for the small # sign (in my version of Finale, it's listed as number 73) > Select > look for "Positioning" > uncheck all boxes on the left and make sure it says "Manually" under the Position drop-down box > OK > Select > drag above mordent.
But if you'd rather not do that, you could leave it. I just think it might be more clear since there's quite a lot of C naturals in this piece.[/li][/list]

I went ahead and did this for measure 14 as well.

Updated.

[Static]

All the changes look good, I'll accept now