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[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Undertale
Game: Deltarune
Console: PC
Title: My Castle Town
Instrumentation Solo Piano
Arranger: Th3Gavst3r

[Th3Gavst3r]

[Atcero]

you come into these forums
posting this amazing arrangement
expecting to get away with it?

Well good cause you will.

All jokes aside, this sounds like a solid arrangement. If i can ask, why did you opt for a more staggered chord format in m.16?

[Radiak488417]

Looks fantastic, the only thing I can find to comment on is that you're missing a high Eb on m85 beat 1. Really glad to see this one

[Th3Gavst3r]

Looks fantastic, the only thing I can find to comment on is that you're missing a high Eb on m85 beat 1. Really glad to see this one

Oh you're totally right, that note totally passed straight through my ears. Great catch, fixed

you come into these forums
posting this amazing arrangement
expecting to get away with it?

Well good cause you will.

YES!! YES!! Y3-S!!

If i can ask, why did you opt for a more staggered chord format in m.16?

Mostly because it feels more drawn out and strictly timed than a regular rolled chord, and it also starts on the downbeat rather than ending on it

[Static]

Not much to say here, generally looks pretty good

• m40 RH: This arpeggio marking is at a slight angle for some reason.
• m55/71 RH: Beat 2 should be An instead of Ab, and I think the grace note is just from the echo and not actually a note.
• m79 RH: I would suggest including the Eb in here from the choir part, both to show its resolution to D in m80, but also to give a taste of that augmented harmony in m79.
• Maybe include a D.C. or repeat, since the track repeats in-game.

[Latios212]

Looks great! I just have a few small comments to add:
- pp and mp seem a bit soft for the song? It's subdued but doesn't feel that subdued, to me at least. Up to you though
- I think the octaves in the LH in m. 4/8/12 make it sound a bit heavy. How about removing the lower G?
- The LH in m. 32 sounds a bit weird with open fifths - you get exposed tritones on beats 2-3. I think making these triads (adding the third) would sound better. Same goes for m. 48, what do you think?

I'm not sure I understand the reasoning for putting slurs specifically in the places you have them, but it's up to you. A few things that do catch my eye though:
  - For the slur in m. 19/35, is this supposed to convey the existence of the bottom layer? It seems a bit odd to have it bend from the Bb to the C. I think I'd suggest writing these couple measures similar to how 27 is written
  - You could use a slur on the single notes in m. 84-85 to signal they're part of a different phrase.

m79 RH: I would suggest including the Eb in here from the choir part, both to show its resolution to D in m80, but also to give a taste of that augmented harmony in m79.

Along similar lines, the upper LH notes on top of beat 1 of m. 77 and 79 strike me as a bit odd, obscuring the bass note strike. Could they be included as RH harmony instead?

m55/71 RH: Beat 2 should be An instead of Ab, and I think the grace note is just from the echo and not actually a note.

I'm definitely hearing this as Gav wrote it but with the grace note being An instead of Ab.

[Static]

I'm definitely hearing this as Gav wrote it but with the grace note being An instead of Ab.

I'm listening again and I hear the An pretty clearly right on beat 2 of both of these measures. The Bb only plays on beat 1, and there is no grace note (it's just an echo). It's easier to tell when it's slowed down (like 0.75x).

[Th3Gavst3r]

Static

m40 RH: This arpeggio marking is at a slight angle for some reason.

Oops must've clicked something I shouldn't have

m55/71 RH: Beat 2 should be An instead of Ab, and I think the grace note is just from the echo and not actually a note.

Yeah I agree that it's an An but I doubt it's an echo, it's enunciated way more than the background echos. Changed the note though

m79 RH: I would suggest including the Eb in here from the choir part, both to show its resolution to D in m80, but also to give a taste of that augmented harmony in m79.

That's probably a good idea. I also added some voice leading in the measures around it and separated the layers to show the movement

Maybe include a D.C. or repeat, since the track repeats in-game.

Hmm yeah the soundtrack doesn't loop, but it wouldn't hurt to tell the player where the repeat goes. Added a D.C. to the end


Latios

pp and mp seem a bit soft for the song? It's subdued but doesn't feel that subdued, to me at least. Up to you though

I had another listen over the whole song and changed the dynamics placement a bit. It starts at p now and climaxes with mf at m81, whereas before the loudest point was mp at m33 which definitely didn't sound like the most energetic place in the original

I think the octaves in the LH in m. 4/8/12 make it sound a bit heavy. How about removing the lower G?

Yeah I agree, took out the octave

The LH in m. 32 sounds a bit weird with open fifths - you get exposed tritones on beats 2-3. I think making these triads (adding the third) would sound better. Same goes for m. 48, what do you think?

Oh yeah I didn't notice those 3rds in there. Made them into triads

I'm not sure I understand the reasoning for putting slurs specifically in the places you have them, but it's up to you.

I don't think I did a very good job with the slurs in general, so I did another pass and leaned more into phrasing than legato for the placement. Hopefully it's better now

For the slur in m. 19/35, is this supposed to convey the existence of the bottom layer? It seems a bit odd to have it bend from the Bb to the C. I think I'd suggest writing these couple measures similar to how 27 is written

Took this advice nugget

You could use a slur on the single notes in m. 84-85 to signal they're part of a different phrase.

I think those notes are clearer now that the other phrases are marked with slurs. I still want them to be staccato to indicate lightness, so I'm hesitant to add a slur and make them look tenuto

Along similar lines, the upper LH notes on top of beat 1 of m. 77 and 79 strike me as a bit odd, obscuring the bass note strike. Could they be included as RH harmony instead?

I originally lowered the entire harmony in that section by an octave since the melody leaps down in m78, so otherwise the harmony would obscure the melody instead of the bass there. But you're right about it sounding a bit muddy, so I think it sounds fine to just leave the harmony in the upper register and omit the D from m78 specifically. I still included the second D above the melody in m80 because that m79 Eb in G major wants really badly to resolve to D

I'm definitely hearing this as Gav wrote it but with the grace note being An instead of Ab.

I'm listening again and I hear the An pretty clearly right on beat 2 of both of these measures. The Bb only plays on beat 1, and there is no grace note (it's just an echo). It's easier to tell when it's slowed down (like 0.75x).

Yeah I still think it's not an echo too. You can hear the delay effect on the Bb from beat 1 there and it sounds much different than the An. There's also not an An played anywhere beforehand that could've caused an echo. Still agree about changing it to An though



Also added an upper C to the RH on m87 beat 1. I'm not totally convinced that it's a piano note and not from the glockenspiel, but there isn't a C in that measure until beat 3 to complete the AbM7 so I added it

[Static]

Sorry if I was unclear before, but this is what I'm hearing in m55:

The Bb is the note that I hear as an echo, not the An. I don't hear the Bb actually restruck on beat 2.

[Th3Gavst3r]

Sorry if I was unclear before, but this is what I'm hearing in m55:

The Bb is the note that I hear as an echo, not the An. I don't hear the Bb actually restruck on beat 2.

Oh wow I hear that even less lol
You can also listen to Empty Town though, and I think the reiteration of that note is pretty clear in that version

[Static]

I hear that note in Empty Town, but still not in Castle Town...

The rest of the changes look fine on my end, so I'll approve, but I'd like someone else to take a listen there too. I'm just not hearing the Bb there.

[mastersuperfan]

I'm hearing the way Gav has it pretty clearly; the piano seems to articulate the An and Bb on beat 2 in quick succession.

[Latios212]

I've revisited that part a few times in the past couple of days... and still hear it the way Gav has it. Given that MSF has also weighed in to agree, I'm going to accept this one as is now (other changes look good!).

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Latios212.

~Zeta, your friendly NSM-Bot