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Author Topic: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet  (Read 1417 times)

cashwarrior1

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Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« on: September 30, 2022, 11:31:23 PM »

Alright this was kinda done hastily since I am a little busy rn 😅

Pokémon Super Mystery Dungeon
Ancient Barrow
[musx]

« Last Edit: October 05, 2022, 04:57:32 PM by cashwarrior1 »
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Bloop

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #1 on: October 05, 2022, 03:10:01 PM »

-m9 and 11: The chords in m9 and the first two in m11 are a bit too big of a stretch with the held bass note, I'd suggest removing the top notes (moving them down an octave sounds a bit too muddy)
-m14: I hear F and Bb in 8ths on beat 4 here
-m17-19: Since the first layer octaves are all staccato, I think it's actually possible to play the marimba part in its original octave instead of switching octaves halfway through. Also, I think I hear the L.H. an octave lower.
-m19: The Ab in the R.H. on beat 3.5 should be an An. Also, you can beam the two loose 8ths in the L.H. together, since it's the same as in m18 beat 1-2.
-m23: The R.H. rhythm in beats 1-2 should be a quarter triplet.
-m24: Maybe you could do a crescendo to forte instead of mf? The difference between mp and mf isn't that big to crescendo to in 4 bars.
-m25-28: I hear the R.H. an octave down and the L.H. two octaves up (at least, the important notes). You can probably switch hands here too then :p
-m28: Maybe you can add in the percussion part in this bar in the L.H.? I haven't checked exactly what notes would fit, but it sounds a little bit pitched. Rhythm is two quarter triplets.
-m29: I think it might be better to try and differentiate the english horn and harp parts a bit: something like this maybe?

-m30: I don't hear the Ab in the R.H. in beat 3, I only hear the cello one which is already there an octave below. It also makes sure the listener won't confuse the Ab as the melody note.
-m35 and 37: It might be better to use a dotted line instead of a straight one for hand-switching-indications like this (Behind Bars suggests it at least). In m35, the melody note on beat 4 should have its beam flipped, and in 37 it might be better to have the Eb still in the L.H. and switch hands when going to the Bb: currently it looks like the melody is going "up" to the Eb below.
-m42: The Cb on beat 4 has a little Bb-Cb flourish at the end before the Ab in the next bar, which you could write as 16th grace notes at the end of this bar or the start of the next.
-m52-54: You won't be able to hold the Bb in the melody if you re-pedal in m53 and m54, so maybe it's better to remove the octave Bb too?
-m56-58: I hear the R.H. glockenspiel notes an octave up, maybe moving the R.H. up an octave together with the string notes sounds a bit more mysterious?
-m57-58: I think it's better to write the Gb's here as F#. In m57 it makes it clearer the chord is D major, in m58 it's a Bb+maj7. If it was just the Bb+, you could make a case for it staying as Gb, but I think in context with the D major it's better to have both as a F#.
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cashwarrior1

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #2 on: October 05, 2022, 04:59:02 PM »

-m28: Maybe you can add in the percussion part in this bar in the L.H.? I haven't checked exactly what notes would fit, but it sounds a little bit pitched. Rhythm is two quarter triplets.
I don't think I got the pitches right but I tried lol

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Bloop

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #3 on: October 05, 2022, 06:22:41 PM »

I don't think I got the pitches right but I tried lol
I think it's just a half step up haha, so Ab and F.

Looking mostly good! Just a few small things:
-m17-19: With "in its original octave" I actually meant it an octave lower :p Like this:

-m20: Didn't notice this at first, but the stems of the R.H. here should be flipped, since the second layer is considered as the top voice. Or, if you want it to be the bottom voice, the rest on beat 1 should be below the whole note dyad.
-m58: Did you miss changing the Gb on beat 4 to a F# or did you intentionally leave it as Gb here? :p
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cashwarrior1

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #4 on: October 05, 2022, 08:42:24 PM »

-m58: Did you miss changing the Gb on beat 4 to a F# or did you intentionally leave it as Gb here? :p
my brain is not working today i didn't realize that was gb

udated.
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Bloop

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #5 on: October 06, 2022, 06:01:23 PM »

Great, then I'll approve!
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Static

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #6 on: October 16, 2022, 06:23:40 PM »

wow the background 8th note part in m1-16 sounds like spooky Corridors of Time

  • m8 RH beat 3: I don't hear the A in the middle here. It sounds like a triplet, but just a quarter note Bb and eighth note G.
  • m10 LH beat 4: This chord sounds like Dn-Fn-An to me.
  • m16 RH: I hear the harp part as this instead:
  • m19 RH beat 2.5: The Gb in Layer 2 should be F, like in the previous two bars.
  • m25-28 RH: The upper two notes sound like they should be minor seconds instead of major seconds. I'm hearing En-F and F-Gb.
  • m27-28 RH: The tremolo beams and accidentals are almost touching each other; you can adjust the beam length with the Beam Extension Tool.
  • m30 LH: The second quarter note in the triplet should be Db instead of Eb.
  • m48-52 LH: This would be a good spot to add lower octaves to the LH part (maybe just on beats 1 and 2.5) for a more full sound; this is pretty much the climax of the piece.
  • m55 RH: I hear this measure quite a bit differently too. The rhythm is played loosely, but I'm definitely not hearing as many notes as you had written:

cashwarrior1

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #7 on: October 16, 2022, 07:07:36 PM »

wow the background 8th note part in m1-16 sounds like spooky Corridors of Time
Corridors of Crime 😳

  • m48-52 LH: This would be a good spot to add lower octaves to the LH part (maybe just on beats 1 and 2.5) for a more full sound; this is pretty much the climax of the piece.
I didn't do it on m51 and 52 because of the second voice

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Static

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #8 on: October 16, 2022, 08:00:29 PM »

I didn't do it on m51 and 52 because of the second voice
Makes sense. I was thinking of just removing that voice there to focus on the bass part, but I think it sounds as good or better with it included.

Only thing left is m10 LH beat 4; I'm hearing Dn there instead of Db.

cashwarrior1

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #9 on: October 16, 2022, 09:30:55 PM »

Only thing left is m10 LH beat 4; I'm hearing Dn there instead of Db.
oh whoops forgot about the keysignature

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Re: Cashwarrior1's Halloween Sheet
« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2022, 10:50:31 PM »

Looks good, accepted
 

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