[MUL] TUNIC - "Memories of Memories" by PlayfulPiano

[Kricketune54]

Went back and forth a bit but I'm okay with atmospheric. Approved.

[PlayfulPiano]

woooo

[Bloop]

Sorry for the wait on this! Nice job on imitating the panning and volume swell effects ^^

-m9-16: I feel like I'm missing some of the minor second crunchiness in the R.H., maybe you could add the G's and F's back in beat 2, 2.5 and 3?
-m17-end of piece: Make sure to give the L.H. some time to jump back down to the bass notes at the end of each bar. It's probably best to end the harmony part in the top staff on beat 4.5, which gives the L.H. as much time to jump down as it has to jump up.
-m33-34: Are the accent marks in the R.H. needed? It seems to be playing in the same general vibe as before, where you already mentioned that the melody should stand out. Same kinda thing in m69 and m85
-m44: Are the Ab's in the L.H. imitating that swelling sound at the start of the measure? If so, that seems to be the same as in m43, so maybe it's more appropriate to just copy the second layer of the R.H. in that measure
-m45: Maybe you could move the high string voice in a separate layer, and maybe even move it down an octave if appropriate, so it doesn't get in the way of the piano melody. In places like m47-48, the player can easily mistake the high Db and C as the piano voice, when they're just the string additions.
-m77-84: Maybe you could add some more notes in the harmony part in the top staff? There's enough room and energy to fill it out a bit more, as it sounds a bit empty without the extra voices.

[PlayfulPiano]

Sorry for the wait on this! Nice job on imitating the panning and volume swell effects ^^

-m9-16: I feel like I'm missing some of the minor second crunchiness in the R.H., maybe you could add the G's and F's back in beat 2, 2.5 and 3?
-m17-end of piece: Make sure to give the L.H. some time to jump back down to the bass notes at the end of each bar. It's probably best to end the harmony part in the top staff on beat 4.5, which gives the L.H. as much time to jump down as it has to jump up.
-m33-34: Are the accent marks in the R.H. needed? It seems to be playing in the same general vibe as before, where you already mentioned that the melody should stand out. Same kinda thing in m69 and m85
-m44: Are the Ab's in the L.H. imitating that swelling sound at the start of the measure? If so, that seems to be the same as in m43, so maybe it's more appropriate to just copy the second layer of the R.H. in that measure
-m45: Maybe you could move the high string voice in a separate layer, and maybe even move it down an octave if appropriate, so it doesn't get in the way of the piano melody. In places like m47-48, the player can easily mistake the high Db and C as the piano voice, when they're just the string additions.
-m77-84: Maybe you could add some more notes in the harmony part in the top staff? There's enough room and energy to fill it out a bit more, as it sounds a bit empty without the extra voices.

-Done
-Done for most, not all of the measures. Some I kept the upper LH for beat 4.5 in places where I feel it's more needed (usually if the lh wasn't an octave). Also included a 3rd to the lower LH for that 4.5 beat so it isn't completely silent and has a downwards transition.
-Probably fair, i'll keep the accents in the musx file but make them hidden (and remove the similes as well).
-If you mean the synth strings then yeah. And I hear what you hear, but I think it's a G for m43 not Ab like m44. Included, but also removed the m44 second layer because ties were conflicting with noteheads and I couldn't get a good tie position that seemed natural and not conflict with noteheads.
-Tried my best at this, but I think there might be some visual conflicts that I'll need help correcting.
-Honestly not sure what you mean by this point, the melody is a single note for this section and the lh treble section does include some pretty weird gaps (the C/B for example).

Updated

[Bloop]

Sorry for my late reply (again)! I've been very busy with some stuff recently, so my updater stuff has been on hold for a bit. Anyway, back to the feedback:

-Done for most, not all of the measures. Some I kept the upper LH for beat 4.5 in places where I feel it's more needed (usually if the lh wasn't an octave). Also included a 3rd to the lower LH for that 4.5 beat so it isn't completely silent and has a downwards transition.

With "end the harmony part in the top staff on beat 4.5" I actually meant having the last note on that beat. There's at least a smaller leap with the new L.H. notes on beat 4.5, but it's still quite a quick leap that I feel is still a bit uncomfortable to play. This is what I was thinking of:
You cannot view this attachment.

-Tried my best at this, but I think there might be some visual conflicts that I'll need help correcting.

Most of it is moving the 8th notes a little bit to the right so they don't go through the whole note. You're a bit inconsistent with the accent markings too: sometimes they're on the third layer, sometimes the first layer, sometimes both (unless that was intentional). Also, make sure any 8th rests have their little circle between stave lines, not on them. Good rule of thumb is to always move them an even number of ticks up or down from their standard position.

-Honestly not sure what you mean by this point, the melody is a single note for this section and the lh treble section does include some pretty weird gaps (the C/B for example).

In the original, the L.H. treble section sounds a bit fuller here than the part before, and I hear some Db's in there too. It's mostly to contrast this part a bit more compared to the section before.

[PlayfulPiano]

Sorry for my late reply (again)! I've been very busy with some stuff recently, so my updater stuff has been on hold for a bit. Anyway, back to the feedback:
With "end the harmony part in the top staff on beat 4.5" I actually meant having the last note on that beat. There's at least a smaller leap with the new L.H. notes on beat 4.5, but it's still quite a quick leap that I feel is still a bit uncomfortable to play. This is what I was thinking of:
You cannot view this attachment.
Most of it is moving the 8th notes a little bit to the right so they don't go through the whole note. You're a bit inconsistent with the accent markings too: sometimes they're on the third layer, sometimes the first layer, sometimes both (unless that was intentional). Also, make sure any 8th rests have their little circle between stave lines, not on them. Good rule of thumb is to always move them an even number of ticks up or down from their standard position.
In the original, the L.H. treble section sounds a bit fuller here than the part before, and I hear some Db's in there too. It's mostly to contrast this part a bit more compared to the section before.

Sorry for not getting back to this sooner.

-The reason I opted out of doing this is that the lack of any notes for beat 4.5 makes it sound way too empty for it to feel fluid from measure to measure. I actually do like the addition of the lower eighth, which does help the performer lead their left hand towards the beat 1 octave dyad.
-I have accents on both, it's just that some have the first layer hidden and some have the third layer hidden. I'm not exactly sure what would be the best standardizing to address this (the point is to have b1 in these cases both be accented and be visually obvious to be played together).
-Done, tried matching it with past dyad combinations.

Updated.

[Bloop]

Once again, sorry for the delay on my part too ;s

-The reason I opted out of doing this is that the lack of any notes for beat 4.5 makes it sound way too empty for it to feel fluid from measure to measure. I actually do like the addition of the lower eighth, which does help the performer lead their left hand towards the beat 1 octave dyad.

I understand your reasoning yeah, though I still find some of them to be a bit too big/too quick to be comfortable (most notably the one in m53), but at least the jumps aren't as a big as they were before, so it's ok.

-I have accents on both, it's just that some have the first layer hidden and some have the third layer hidden. I'm not exactly sure what would be the best standardizing to address this (the point is to have b1 in these cases both be accented and be visually obvious to be played together).

Ah I see, in that case I think it's best to just have an accent mark above the top note, as it will probably get messy to add them in both layers. Make sure to move them a little bit up in places like m55-56, and just have one in m59-60.

Some other visual things
-In places like m47 and m55, make sure to move the 8th note a little bit to the right, so its stem doesn't clash with the whole note.
-In places like m54, the 8th rest in the middle layer should be one tick up or down

[PlayfulPiano]

Once again, sorry for the delay on my part too ;s
I understand your reasoning yeah, though I still find some of them to be a bit too big/too quick to be comfortable (most notably the one in m53), but at least the jumps aren't as a big as they were before, so it's ok.
Ah I see, in that case I think it's best to just have an accent mark above the top note, as it will probably get messy to add them in both layers. Make sure to move them a little bit up in places like m55-56, and just have one in m59-60.

Some other visual things
-In places like m47 and m55, make sure to move the 8th note a little bit to the right, so its stem doesn't clash with the whole note.
-In places like m54, the 8th rest in the middle layer should be one tick up or down

I think got everything here done.

Updated.

[Bloop]

That's quick!

-In places like m54, the 8th rest in the middle layer should be one tick up or down

With this I meant the 8th rest in the first layer (which is in the middle of the R.H.), not the second layer on bottom. It's just in m54 and 58. The idea here being that the placements of rests should always in stave spaces (like in their standard position in the L.H.).

[PlayfulPiano]

That's quick!
With this I meant the 8th rest in the first layer (which is in the middle of the R.H.), not the second layer on bottom. It's just in m54 and 58. The idea here being that the placements of rests should always in stave spaces (like in their standard position in the L.H.).

Oh whoops, when you mentioned middle I thought you were referring to the middlemost layer.

Fixed that in both positions, and updated. Didn't revert the other rest change I did, if that's alright.

[Bloop]

Awesome, now I'm ready to accept!
You cannot view this attachment.

[Zeta]

This submission has been accepted by Bloop.

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