[PS2] Tales of the Abyss - "New world (Two Pianos)" by thatoneguy

[Zeta]

Submission Information:
Series: Tales
Game: Tales of the Abyss
Console: PlayStation 2
Title: New world
Instrumentation Two Pianos
Arranger: thatoneguy

[thatoneguy]

It's been *checks calendar* at least a year since I was last active as an arranger. Yet here I am, with a song that's not one of three different songs I've been intermittently been working on for years. Nor one of the previous submissions that I haven't felt inspired to go back and fix with suggestions given to me. Perhaps I'll get to one of them in the next couple months now that I've come back and have some time with summer break from college. At any rate, here are my notes to start:

• There are 8 notes [from the harp] that I don't readily hear in the track that were present on the MIDI I extracted from the files of my copy of the game. I kept those notes in because without having memorized the track, you wouldn't even know; plus it keeps Piano 1 a smidge more occupied.
• I would love some nit-picks with my chosen phrasing, dynamic contrasts, articulations, my horrid formatting, and the like. There's probably a bit more I could do that I haven't even considered, so critiques and suggestions are welcome!

Edited out my pretentious comment as I felt guilty regarding how rude I was. My apologies to anyone who read the original post.

[XiaoMigros]

Hi! I hope this is nit-picky enough for you...

• I think the w in 'World' should be capitalised
• m1-16: You could exchange the LH of player 1 with the RH of player 2, then you can write the current P1LH part in its original register
• I think the 32nd notes at the end of m8 would be better as grace notes
• m1-4 & 9-12: I think beat 3 & 3.5 in the LH of P2 both sound like regular eighth notes
• For m5-8 and 13-16, I also think these are better as eighth notes; eighth+rest is not the same thing as staccato quarter
• Do you want to write the whole P2LH part under an 8vb marking (except for the end)? Especially for m1-16, where all the notes are below the staff
• Since m1-6 and m9-14 are identical, you could use a repeat instead of writing them out twice?
• On page 3, you could move all the slurs of the harp part between the staves, like you do for the first one
• Also, I feel like you could be more creative with the dynamics here, especially on the second system: There's no need to have P1 match P2 and get louder towards the second measure.
• For this page in particular, make sure that the cresc/decresc markings don't collide with beams or dynamics, and, where there's space, dynamics and hairpins should be on the same height.
• m25+: I'm hearing P2RH as triads, there's an extra layer of harmony playing an octave below your current part.
• For P2LH, the same point as earlier concerning note durations: These all sound like regular eighths to me
• m25: If you want, you could write P1RH under an 8va line, to show that it matches the LH
• m33+: I feel like the flute melody loses focus too suddenly here; in the previous section it played in octaves, but now it doesn't plus it's an octave lower than the original. Do you think there's a way to let it stand out better?
• I don't think the senza pedale marking is needed in the beginning of the sheet and in front of the ending; it seems pretty clear from context how it is to be played.
• For the rest of the con/senza pedale markings, it would be great if they could start just in front of the note, moved left slightly
• Thanks for labeling the ending! As of recently, we'd like them to be labeled as 'Optional Ending' (size 14, bold)
• For some reason your noteheads are loaded from the EngraverFontSet and not Maestro, could you change that?
• I'm able to fit 3 systems onto each page from page 2 onwards, reducing the total number to 4.
• Could you go over the dynamics again and make sure they're all centered between the staves?
  Additionally, the ones in your ending are a little too close to the repeat barline.

That's all for now, let me know if you have any questions!

[thatoneguy]

Responses in red

• I think the w in 'World' should be capitalised
  Noted, and currently in consideration. It's listed as a lowercase both on the official soundtrack and in-game music player.
• m1-16: You could exchange the LH of player 1 with the RH of player 2, then you can write the current P1LH part in its original register
  Noted, and currently in consideration. My 2 main concerns with this are potential overcrowding in the treble register with both pianos, and a couple awkward hand/finger crossings for P1.
• I think the 32nd notes at the end of m8 would be better as grace notes
  Agreed; fixed.
• m1-4 & 9-12: I think beat 3 & 3.5 in the LH of P2 both sound like regular eighth notes
  Agreed & fixed; not sure what I was thinking at the time...
• For m5-8 and 13-16, I also think these are better as eighth notes; eighth+rest is not the same thing as staccato quarter
  Yeah, that does make a bit more of an impact now that I've tried reading it both ways. Fixed.
• Do you want to write the whole P2LH part under an 8vb marking (except for the end)? Especially for m1-16, where all the notes are below the staff
  Yes; Not sure why I didn't. Fixed.
• Since m1-6 and m9-14 are identical, you could use a repeat instead of writing them out twice?
  I'm more than happy to send you the product with this change implemented, but I personally believe it disrupts the more natural flow of how systems lined up with how the sections were divided (if that makes sense).
• On page 3, you could move all the slurs of the harp part between the staves, like you do for the first one
  Done; I kept "sim." on the bottom system for P1 due to my dynamic marking in m24. I also have P1LH stems pointed in the same direction as the top system for additional visual similarity. I am more than willing to get rid of the "sim." and just add the slurs if you think that would be better for clarity sake.
• Also, I feel like you could be more creative with the dynamics here, especially on the second system: There's no need to have P1 match P2 and get louder towards the second measure.
  I think all the messa di voce I've been taught and done as a vocalist took over for that page. And looking at it now, P1 & P2 having parallel dynamic movement wasn't my finest musical decision. I've changed the dynamics a bit, but I still want it in that tranquil, soft, legato feel (exception of m22 P1RH with that "climatic" Cnat).
• For this page in particular, make sure that the cresc/decresc markings don't collide with beams or dynamics, and, where there's space, dynamics and hairpins should be on the same height.
  I'm going to be honest here, I don't know how I missed all the collisions in P1 at the bottom system. That's nowhere near even a "subtle" collision. Should be fixed.
  
• m25+: I'm hearing P2RH as triads, there's an extra layer of harmony playing an octave below your current part.
  Fixed. That was a user error; I did a transcription on Musescore for my speedy convenience and then pulled up Finale to write the piano arrangement based on my transcription. I clearly ignored the viola/violin III part in there. Oops.
• For P2LH, the same point as earlier concerning note durations: These all sound like regular eighths to me
  Agreed; fixed.
• m25: If you want, you could write P1RH under an 8va line, to show that it matches the LH
  Done.
• m33+: I feel like the flute melody loses focus too suddenly here; in the previous section it played in octaves, but now it doesn't plus it's an octave lower than the original. Do you think there's a way to let it stand out better?
  I think I have a decent solution. M33-35 P1 now has the harp in the LH while doubling the flute at original pitch in the RH, before it [probably] realistically plays those harp arpeggios and continues as I initally wrote it. So, m37-39 P2RH has the flute part in octaves (at original pitch & octave below). m39 I threw the E4 (originally P2RH) to P1LH. Thoughts?
• I don't think the senza pedale marking is needed in the beginning of the sheet and in front of the ending; it seems pretty clear from context how it is to be played.
  While I don't disagree at all, I also believe having it clearly stated won't hurt either. As a few of my professors have told me, having more specific markings in music are more common place and preferred by some.
• For the rest of the con/senza pedale markings, it would be great if they could start just in front of the note, moved left slightly
  Done.
• Thanks for labeling the ending! As of recently, we'd like them to be labeled as 'Optional Ending' (size 14, bold)
  No problem! And label has been edited accordingly.
• For some reason your noteheads are loaded from the EngraverFontSet and not Maestro, could you change that?
  I think I fixed it?
• I'm able to fit 3 systems onto each page from page 2 onwards, reducing the total number to 4.
  If you want to send me what that looks like with these changes, I'd be willing to consider it. Maybe I'm being too picky, but I like having the sections on each separate page. I'm also horrible with dealing with systems on Finale, as it takes me maybe 45 minutes on a good day. I can get by, but some of the work I had to do before my initial upload of this was a nightmare from what I remember.
• Could you go over the dynamics again and make sure they're all centered between the staves?
  Heh heh heh...*cries* So, uh, with the changes I made for m33-36 messed with the dynamics for P1. Otherwise, I typically try to center any dynamic markings between staves as best as I can with the spacing I have.
  Additionally, the ones in your ending are a little too close to the repeat barline.
  Agreed; fixed.

Thank you for the nit-picks! All appreciated and helpful. Let me know if you have any questions. Thanks again!

[XiaoMigros]

Noted, and currently in consideration. It's listed as a lowercase both on the official soundtrack and in-game music player.

Oh, that's interesting. I went off of the video and presumed a typo, but if that's not the case, it should probably stay lowercase.

Noted, and currently in consideration. My 2 main concerns with this are potential overcrowding in the treble register with both pianos, and a couple awkward hand/finger crossings for P1.

Those are both valid concerns, and I'll admit I missed the hand crossings on my first feedback pass.
One advantage of keeping P1LH in its current octave is that it helps fill in a space otherwise not played in, the other parts are all slightly higher or much lower. So I'm happy to go with whatever you end up choosing

I'm more than happy to send you the product with this change implemented, but I personally believe it disrupts the more natural flow of how systems lined up with how the sections were divided (if that makes sense).

Maybe I'm being too picky, but I like having the sections on each separate page.

Usually I'm all for keeping sections 'intact' across pages or systems, but in this case there are other practicalities to consider. The main one being the resulting number of pages. In my experience, 4 pages just about fits on a piano's sheet stand, but not 5 pages. Additionally, but less importantly, there's a lot of white space at the bottom of the pages currently, which again seems odd when that space could be used to hold an extra system.
I do have an edit where the sheet fits onto 4 pages, but this was made with the older version (and not with the repeat). If you still think it's useful I'm happy to send it to you.

I am more than willing to get rid of the "sim." and just add the slurs if you think that would be better for clarity sake.

Now that the dynamics/hairpins aren't in the way, I actually think this would be a cleaner option. Go for it

M33-35 P1 now has the harp in the LH while doubling the flute at original pitch in the RH, before it [probably] realistically plays those harp arpeggios and continues as I initally wrote it. So, m37-39 P2RH has the flute part in octaves (at original pitch & octave below). m39 I threw the E4 (originally P2RH) to P1LH. Thoughts?

Now this is some nice arranging I like it, both relative to the whole arrangement and to the resulting parts as well.

As a few of my professors have told me, having more specific markings in music are more common place and preferred by some.

I'm no professor, but I think they were probably referring to different types of markings. Pedaling is usually left to the pianist's discretion, unless there's super specifical pedaling desired that isnt deductible from context (not the case here). I'm not going to pester you with this, but with the constant start/stop pedal indications, it would be better (in my opinion) to just add a 'ped. ad lib.' marking at the beginning of the sheet, and nothing else. Up to you

I think I fixed it?

Yeah, looks good now. You might want to update your template file(s) if you're using any, it's probably the same there too.

• With 8va markings, make sure they all start just before the note, and end just after the last note (and not at the end of the barline). Also, I think the ones in the ending would look best if they're vertically centered above the notes.
• In the ending, you could exchange the first chords of P1LH and P2RH? right now one hand jumps up and the other jumps down, but this could be avoided altogether.

Let me know what you think about repeats/systems, because based on that I may or may not have more to add!

[XiaoMigros]

Have you had a chance to look over this sheet again yet? If there's anything I can help you with let me know

[Kricketune54]

Second bump for the arranger, are you still around to work on this?