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Author Topic: Libera's Replacements  (Read 2153 times)

Static

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #15 on: September 10, 2020, 08:19:44 PM »

Don't Be Afraid
I went with this beaming because it's what Latios suggested but I've changed it back to normal beaming since it actually looks fine.  (Let me know if any of the beaming is still messed up).  I fixed the tempo marking positioning as well. 
Looks good except for m9 LH and m14 RH (last note should be an 8th).

Libera

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #16 on: September 10, 2020, 08:22:10 PM »

Oops, fixed.

Static

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #17 on: September 10, 2020, 08:26:10 PM »

Nice, I'll approve now.

Maelstrom

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #18 on: November 29, 2020, 10:46:01 PM »

Force Your Way
-8th note beaming feels inconsistent. Some places the beams over rests are broken (m34), and in many others they aren't (m36 has the same phrase) I personally always recommend breaking them, but that's up to you, of course.
-Why note just make RH m37-38 an octave lower to prevent the octave jump down between m38 and m39?
-m76 LH - Rhythm here seems to be like m4, not m2.
-m75-76 LH - no staccatos? These are far more disconnected than the ones on page 1.
-All over the piece are pairs of 8th rests that could and should be combined into quarter rests.

Everything else looks pretty great

Libera

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #19 on: December 02, 2020, 10:14:20 PM »

-8th note beaming feels inconsistent. Some places the beams over rests are broken (m34), and in many others they aren't (m36 has the same phrase) I personally always recommend breaking them, but that's up to you, of course.
-All over the piece are pairs of 8th rests that could and should be combined into quarter rests. 

I have now tried to be more consistent and also broke some more beams.  Fixed the rests as well.  I think that was a holdover from when I was beaming the sheet completely differently that I forgot to fix.  Nice catch.

-Why note just make RH m37-38 an octave lower to prevent the octave jump down between m38 and m39?

Fixed.  Honestly not really sure why it was like that to begin with.

-m76 LH - Rhythm here seems to be like m4, not m2.

If by rhythm you mean pitches, fixed.

-m75-76 LH - no staccatos? These are far more disconnected than the ones on page 1.

Sure, can do.



Thanks for checking, files updated!

Maelstrom

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #20 on: December 02, 2020, 10:26:47 PM »

There's still some funky stuff, mostly in m29 and 30. 8th rests can be combined and the b3-4 8ths of m29 really should be split. That's it, though.

Libera

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #21 on: December 02, 2020, 10:38:20 PM »

Fixed.  Sorry about that.

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #22 on: December 03, 2020, 01:33:53 AM »

Np, approved

Latios212

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #23 on: December 10, 2020, 01:17:19 AM »

Don't Be Afraid
- I know this is kinda nitpicky, but if you're going to beam this piece in 3+3+2+2, the time signature should be 10/8. With that said, you could keep it as 5/4 and change the beaming since this is a really common 5/4 groove anyway.
I went with this beaming because it's what Latios suggested but I've changed it back to normal beaming since it actually looks fine.
Sure, this works fine too. One thing you may want to consider is putting accents on beat 1 and 2.5 in the left hand to imply the 3+3+2+2 rhythm a little more noticeably, but you don't have to.

Not much else to say here; this looks pretty good.
- m. 11/19 beat 5 in the original sounds like it holds the C for the beat rather than playing C and B staccato.
- One thing I find odd is that the ascent in m. 33 doesn't end on the upper E like it does in the original, leaving it sounding somewhat unresolved.


Fithos Lusec Wecos Vinosec
stuff
Ah... I missed responding to this post somehow, sorry. I've approved this one ^^
« Last Edit: December 10, 2020, 03:11:56 AM by Latios212 »
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Libera

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #24 on: December 10, 2020, 08:43:24 PM »

Sure, this works fine too. One thing you may want to consider is putting accents on beat 1 and 2.5 in the left hand to imply the 3+3+2+2 rhythm a little more noticeably, but you don't have to.

Yeah I'm not sure this is needed due to the right hand (or left hand) patterns making it obvious in most places.

- m. 11/19 beat 5 in the original sounds like it holds the C for the beat rather than playing C and B staccato.

I still hear it going down to the B, but I've put it in as a slur rather than two staccatos since the articulation is definitely longer here.

- One thing I find odd is that the ascent in m. 33 doesn't end on the upper E like it does in the original, leaving it sounding somewhat unresolved.

I guess I was trying to keep the melody at the top but it probably makes sense to swap them here to complete that run.

Thanks for checking!

Fithos Lusec Wecos Vinosec
Ah... I missed responding to this post somehow, sorry. I've approved this one ^^

No worries!

Latios212

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #25 on: December 12, 2020, 05:35:19 PM »

Don't Be Afraid

Accepted :)
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Maelstrom

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #26 on: December 15, 2020, 02:02:05 AM »

Fithos Lusec Wecos Vinosec
-Courtesy accidental in m46 LH?
-Should there be parenthesis around the naturals in m20-21 or is that intentional or finale exports being bad? Not against there not being parenthesis, just wanted to check.
-m39 RH - b1.5/2.5 should be a Bb and Ab, respectively. 
-m42 RH - Pretty sure the middle note in the chord is an A, not a G.

m48+ - kefka, is that you?

Otherwise, looks fantastic. That's all from me.
« Last Edit: December 15, 2020, 09:23:15 PM by Maelstrom »
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Libera

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #27 on: December 15, 2020, 09:37:39 PM »

-Courtesy accidental in m46 LH?

It's a new system and so the (lack of a) key signature is right there so I don't think it's needed.

-Should there be parenthesis around the naturals in m20-21 or is that intentional or finale exports being bad? Not against there not being parenthesis, just wanted to check.

Yep those are meant to be missing.  I don't usually put them in for courtesies.

-m39 RH - b1.5/2.5 should be a Bb and Ab, respectively. 

Fixed, nice catch.

-m42 RH - Pretty sure the middle note in the chord is an A, not a G.

There is a G in that bar (at least I can hear one) and I included it over the A since the A is already in the bass.  Although I think omitting the A for that reason was the wrong call so I've put it back in.  If you leave out the G in that chord you kind of lose all the tension you've just built up in bar 41 and so it sounds a bit flat I think.



Thanks for checking!

Maelstrom

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #28 on: December 15, 2020, 09:48:02 PM »

No problem, accepting
Great work!
« Last Edit: December 19, 2020, 04:31:33 PM by Maelstrom »
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Static

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Re: Libera's Replacements
« Reply #29 on: December 19, 2020, 08:15:32 PM »

Force Your Way
  • m4, 8, etc. RH: You can make that tied note just a dotted quarter. You have the LH beamed in groups of four 8th notes anyway.
  • m29-36 RH: I'm going to bug you about the beaming again... You sometimes have the notes beamed in groups of 4, sometimes in 2, and it's not consistent even within a single measure sometimes (like m30).
  • m29-36: You have staccato 8th notes on downbeats in the RH that line up with staccato quarter notes in the LH, but in the original track all the staccato notes sound about the same length to me. I think you could clean up this entire section by doing this:
    Spoiler

    Everything lines up between the hands so the rhythms are very clear and easy to read.
    [close]
  • I like the slur in m47-48 but honestly I think just having it go above the notes would look better. That way you don't have to try and squeeze it between the clef and surrounding notes.
  • m49 RH: All of these chords sound like they should have 3 notes instead of 2.
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