Relationships

[LeviR.star]

dont act like a professional on any matter no matter how qualified you think you are. no matter who you are just assume youre wrong about everything. if you dont open your mind to other views you wont ever amount to anything more than just a fool

also sass will never in any way help your situation so keep it to yourself if you dont want to kill your reputation

I can agree with the "sass" advice, but assuming I'm wrong about everything? I'm no genius, but is there anything wrong with having just having a little self-confidence? Some motivation? How's life going to get better if I walk around with no intention of speaking up or trying to improve myself; no plans on ever trying to show that I'm at least right about something, like a math test question or tomorrow's weather? No offense, but that's kind of a scary way of living in my book. I know I don't know everything, but good heavens, Braix.

[Latios212]

Yeah braix your head is in the right place but you need to turn the pessimism down a notch

[Dudeman]

Yeah braix your head is in the right place but you need to turn the pessimism down a notch

This. This isn't the Braix I'm familiar with.

[AmpharosAndy]

You need another AmpharosAndy motivation session I see!

[cashwarrior1]

If she friendzones you I swear I will find her and chew her out until she's guilty down to the bone.

Plz don't chew her, she's rlly nice

Also, I'm obviously still clinging on to the chance of dating, though I try not to. The only thing that makes me not completely give up is that when she rejected me, she felt so bad, worse than I did actually. Also she only doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship right now which makes me think she's saying, "maybe later?". Now, recently I have been able to see her and her actions more like a friend than anything, but that day just made me question her once again.

[Altissimo]

Also, I'm obviously still clinging on to the chance of dating, though I try not to. The only thing that makes me not completely give up is that when she rejected me, she felt so bad, worse than I did actually. Also she only doesn't want to date me because she doesn't want a relationship right now which makes me think she's saying, "maybe later?". Now, recently I have been able to see her and her actions more like a friend than anything, but that day just made me question her once again.

Stop.

She told you once before that she is not interested in a relationship. That's it. That's all there is to it. It means she doesn't want to be in a relationship. It doesn't mean she's playing coy. It doesn't mean she might be interested in the future. It means you are holding onto something that doesn't exist and using it to justify not listening to her words, at all. It's not like she told it to you in Japanese. She told you she wanted to be friends. That means she just wants to be friends.

Ignoring the literal content of her words and remaining convinced that she's somehow lying to you is disrespectful and rude. It's telling her you don't believe she has the right to know what she wants and communicate that clearly to her. It's telling her you don't want to listen to her because you'd rather delude yourself into believing your version of events.

It's gross and it's creepy and it's the entire reason why girls do the thing that levi thought was "friendzoning."

If you respect her as a person, as a human, as a friend, AT ALL, you wouldn't do that to her. You wouldn't make her have to deal with this situation.

Even if "I don't want a relationship right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future, you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.

Don't be creepy.

That goes for everyone.

[cashwarrior1]

Even if "I don't want a relationship right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future, you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.

I'm trying my hardest, okay?

Even if I stopped, it's still going to go on because my mom has to tell everybody that I'm in love, applying pressure to me. Anytime I mention her name, people have to remind me that I like her. Kids at school are starting to ship us and they're going to try and get us to date whether we want to or not. So it's not just me.

[AmpharosAndy]

Alti the official Anti-Creep Minister of nsm.

Someday you'll say something with which I'll disagree. Until that day comes.

[Dudeman]

Can we get Alti a custom title that says "Relationship Guru" please?

[mastersuperfan]

It's that pink symbol under her username

[cashwarrior1]

you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.

Actually I just now saw this. I would like to mention that I do not act upon anything. Everything I post here is something that she did and me being hopeful. Now I try to look at her as a friend and can see that within her actions, but I also see the things she does that seems different than the way she acts with literally everybody else. That is why I sometimes think maybe she does like me more than just "friends". But even if I did date her, I'd still treat her like a friend (the way I treat her now) which is probably why I see things that might mean a relationship on her side.

[Altissimo]

It's that pink symbol under her username

i fucking lol'd

[ThatHiddenCharacter]

Can we get Alti a custom title that says "Relationship Guru" please?

Actually, I disagree with her, at least in this situation. Normally I'd agree, but sometimes a person says they don't want to be in a relationship because they don't want to be in one in the present. In that case, they might want to be with the person, but feel they're not ready to be part of anything serious and are waiting to mature. This is most prominent in high school, which is where I believe Cash is. Again, I'd normally agree with what Alti's saying, but it's not always true, which she is saying it is.

[Altissimo]

Actually, I disagree with her, at least in this situation. Normally I'd agree, but sometimes a person says they don't want to be in a relationship because they don't want to be in one in the present. In that case, they might want to be with the person, but feel they're not ready to be part of anything serious and are waiting to mature. This is most prominent in high school, which is where I believe Cash is. Again, I'd normally agree with what Alti's saying, but it's not always true, which she is saying it is.

I didn't say that, I said that even if they ARE interested in a relationship in the future, you should still respect their fucking wishes for the time being and not continue to hold out for something that MIGHT happen.

Right here:

Even if "I don't want a relationship right now" means she might look to you as a partner in the future, you are still refusing to respect her space and her feelings by holding out for a relationship and acting on it.

[SlowPokemon]

Cashwarrior I know you're not actively trying to be sexist or creepy, but you need to recognize that as a man you will never have to deal with a LOT of things that women go through every day of their lives. It's not a personal slight, it's literally the way things are. You're subconsciously objectifying your friend. All we're trying to do is tell you that you need to think more about your behavior and recognize why it's a problem, because I feel like there's a wall there. It's not just about respecting your friend, it's also about valuing her and really women in general as much as you value yourself. You might think you do, and I understand that you're trying to, but you're not there yet. The fact that SO MANY of us who have been around the block and seen situations like this (especially Alti, who has her own set of insights because she's a woman who's been through this) are telling you your behavior is problematic should really make you start to question your logic here.