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Messages - mastersuperfan

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 163
1
Looks fantastic, a few final things:
- The crescendo in m18 could be moved up a bit so it's not so close to the staccato.
- The second grace note in m26 should be An, not Ab.
- Courtesy Bn in m33 LH?
- m38 LH beat 1.75 clashes with beat 2. You can use the Note Position tool to cluster the 16th notes on beat 1 a bit closer together to the left.
- Your headers, page numbers, and copyright exceed the page margins. Click on it > Text > Alignment > Top/Bottom.
- Subtitle should say THE Legend of Zelda.

Also, I know I said to move them up, but TBH it's probably also okay to rests in m55-56 back in their default position since pretty much all the other rests in the RH are in their default position.

That's all I've got, so I'll approve this now (pending the above fixes) so that someone else can take a look at it.

2
Looks good to me! Since this went through a lot of changes since Mael looked at it, I'm going to ask another updater to take a quick look before accepting.

One thing (not sure if this is on your end too or just mine): the PDF looks fine, but when I open the MUS, there's a redundant E natural on m27 RH beat 2 that gets in the way of the rolled chord marking. Did you edit the MUS file? If so, Notepad might've screwed it up... or it might just be an import issue on my end.

3
This one I'm pretty sure of - don't really hear the figure jump up and play D-E-D there.
Yeah, I hear this one as an A too. I do hear a low D, but I think that's a different voice.

Quick few things from me:
- Do you want to include rests for the vocal line in m16 like you do elsewhere? It is a bit unwieldy to write here, though, with the Layer 1 stems...
- In m64 RH, there's an Eb grace note before the C grace note on beat 4 that you might consider including.
- In m65, the En is doubled an octave up on beat 1, if you wanted to include that in the RH.
- In m69, I hear the guitar melody play an additional F# on beat 2 (right before the F# you already have written in). Also, to my ear the D on beat 4.5 sounds like it's held, not re-articulated on beat 5, but it's hard to make out exactly, so there's room for interpretation there.
- Ehh, I don't like the way m78 is written out... From a glance, it looks like the dotted quarter and the eighth in the second half of the measure belong to the same line. Maybe flip the dotted quarter down?
- Obligatory have-to-mention-at-least-once: I think the m81 dynamic could be moved up slightly to be better centered with the crescendo.

Looks good otherwise. Great song and great sheet!

4
It's a bit weird to have the repeat in the middle of an 8-bar phrase—if you hear differences in the first four bars, I'd just repeat after the whole 8-bar phrase is done, like how you had it before.

5
I don't mind the roll but do you think the roll should also occur at 17-19 RH?

Hm, I don't think the roll is necessary there since you already have the arpeggios there (whereas m25-27 doesn't include the actual 16th note rhythm present in the harp line). If you want to add it in m17-19 though, I can change it for you.

6
Looking good, last few things:

I'm not quite sure what you're referring to with this. On beat 2.5 is the D, and I'm not hearing the G repeated (though I can't exactly tell).
Oops, I meant m10. Although now that I listen again, I'm not sure if it really is a restrike... what you have right now is fine.

I thought this was just some fancy violin playing, because I can't make out any specific notes. I left them as eighth notes for now.
Specifically, I hear F#-E-F#-G.

For m44/46 LH beat 1, I would suggest filling in the chord. After all the measures where the LH plays a full chord on beat 1, it feels empty for the LH not to do so here.

m60 LH second half, I hear the bass as three eighth notes instead of one dotted quarter note.

I notice you have some differences in the LH rhythm in m71, but it sounds the same to me as m17. You also write the RH differently in m68, but that line also sounds the same to me in both m14 and m68 in the original (I don't really hear the G in either case but am totally cool with including it). On that note, unless there are other differences I'm missing, it seems like it would be easiest to just repeat from m64 to m11 directly. That does leave you with one system on the last page, which is not great, but you can then fit five systems on page 3 or 4 if you shrink the spacing for that page.

Dynamics in m1, m2, m49 could be moved down a bit. Crescendo in m56 could be moved up a bit to align better with the mf.

I think that's all. Nice work.

7
man I could just keep listening to this track all night

more like

thrills at night 8)

8
- Where's the D# on m5 RH beat 3 coming from? Not sure I hear it... unless it's supposed to be the vocal line, which I hear articulating the D# on beat 4, not beat 3.
- I hear another D# in m8 an octave below the one that's already there.
- Also hear a B in the chord on m11 LH beat 1.
- m24 RH Layer 2 beat 4 (E-D#) sounds like it should be an octave down, in the LH? (Actually sounds like it should start on beat 3.5 and be F#-E-D# an octave down.) If so, m24 could be made cleaner if Layer 2 beats 1-2 was just merged into Layer 1.
- m25 RH Layer 2 sounds like it should be an octave down too.
- Should the B# in m24 be a Cn instead? (chromatically descending C#-Cn-B)
- m26 RH beat 5 rest should be moved down; otherwise it looks like it's a rest for both layers.
- m27 RH second chord, change the A# to an An? The chord sounds atrocious otherwise. Also maybe write D# for the lower note instead of C#?

9
wow you madlad

this is my favorite boss theme from The Origami King ;D
It's a close second for me right behind The Shifty Sticker!
y'all forgetting about vellumental

The main thing I want to say about this sheet is that I feel like it's pretty sparse at a lot of points, especially in the LH. The LH has a lot of rests, particularly on the beats, and I feel like it makes the sheet sound a lot empty and less driven than the original. I think you could take a lot of liberty in improvising more notes into the LH—I think the LH really needs to be a major rhythmic driver to make up for the lack of percussion.

On the note of the sheet being a bit sparse, you might also consider trying to add harmonies throughout, especially in places like m14-21 RH.

Other thing: I would recommend displaying the eighth rests in m22-29 RH.

10
Went ahead and formatted the files for you: https://www.dropbox.com/sh/v4n8vfsysmisgsy/AACl3Rv_VvvFOHc7qGKrJs78a?dl=0

Other stuff I changed:
- Did some fiddling with dynamics: instead of having an mp in m3, I put a cresc. in m1. Moved the mf in m17 to m20. Added a mp to m29.
- Redid measure and system distribution. Fits on 3 pages now.
- Fixed some notes: m1-4 LH beat 4, m22/23/26/27 LH beats 3-4.
- Lowered m13-16 LH an octave to match the original.
- Changed m15 RH F# to a Gb.
- I put the G back on beat 1.75 in m21-28 since it's actually easy to play and I didn't realize that that was actually what was in the original. However, I did remove a Bb on m28 LH beat 3.75 (playtested this one and it just works more smoothly without the Bb on beat 3.75).
- Got rid of the 8va in m29-36 and just transposed the LH down directly.
- Reverted m27 back to what it was before after hearing it in the original. Added top notes to the chords in m25-27 and also rolled them to mimic the harp. Feel free to change this one, if you prefer to remove the top notes or the rolled markings.

Let me know if there are any other changes you want to make. If you're happy with these files, then so am I.

11
Submissions / Re: [NDS] Rhythm Heaven - "Remix 10" by mastersuperfan
« on: April 18, 2021, 01:53:41 AM »
Love Lab
- The melody at the beginning of 29 should be a quarter rather than two eights
I'm pretty distinctly hearing two eighths. Maybe you're thinking of the original?

Karate Man (Reprise)
- I think the descent in m. 118 should end in a rest on beat 3 rather than the E you have written.
I don't like having complete silence on beat 3... The run feels more complete if it ends on the beat.

Everything else has been updated. Thanks for checking!

12
All right, round two. Note that when I refer to beat numbers, I mean beats 1-2-3-4-5-6 in 6/8 (even in the 3/4 measures).
- I hear a C in the chord on m1 beat 1 LH, but up to you on whether to include it (I think it's fine with or without).
- There's a D on top of the chord in m2 RH. I also don't think I hear the Eb...
- To clarify, for m3, you should also specify the absolute tempo marking q.=99 there as well, not just the eighth=eighth.
- For m3-5 and m7 LH beat 4, I think En (C major chord) would work better as the upper note instead—not sure I hear where the D comes from.
- m8 LH beat 4, I'd suggest Eb over D for the top note. Definitely doesn't sound like a major 7th chord to me.
- For m5 LH, I would suggest filling in the triads over the bass note, instead of just having two notes.
- First chord in m9 also does not sound like a 7th chord (not hearing a Bb). For both chords in m9, I would just suggest turning the LH chords into triads.
- In m11, I hear the melody restrike on beat 2.5.
- Same deal for the chords in m11-18—mostly hearing just triads, no 7th chords.
- The second half of m14 could use some more oomph—like putting in extra notes into the RH on beat 4, and also repeating the harmony notes in both hands on beat 5 (which it sounds like the original does).
- I hear the melody restrike on beat 4 of m18.
- m21 beat 1: I actually do hear a 7th chord here (C in the RH instead of D).
- m21 beat 4 is also a 7th chord (G-D-F-Bn from bottom to top).
- Chords in m22 are different from what you have too. Altogether, I would write m21-22 like this:
Image

[close]
- Sounds like there might be an Fn in the second m23 chord too.
- Not hearing the Ab on m26 RH beat 1.
- The two grace notes in m26 should be Bb-Ab instead of Cb-Bb.
- For m31-48, I'd recommend making all the barlines solid in order to clearly show that all the measures are still the same length. It shouldn't be confusing which bars are 6/8 and which are 3/4 since everything's organized in four-bar phrases. That said, the way you have it right now is also okay.
- I don't hear any D's in m32 (although to be fair, they sound fine in the sheet...).
- Lower note of m33 LH beat 5 sounds like B rather than D.
- I don't hear D#'s in m40—sounds like this might also just be a triad, in which case I'd replace the D#'s with A's on top.
- m39 RH beats 5-6 sound like sixteenth notes instead of just eighth notes.
- I also hear a G in the chord on m41 beat 6.
- Any particular reason why you didn't write the same eighth note rhythm in m40/42 LH as you did in m32/34/36?
- The slur at the end of m42 RH and the one in m43-44 could just be combined into one slur.
- The last two 16th notes in the RH at the end of m44 should be G# and A# instead of Gn and An.
- m43 LH chord should be a C# minor triad (C#-E-G#) instead of C#-E-F#.
- Courtesy natural on the lower G in m46 LH?
- In the run at the end of m46, the C# and F# should be Cn and Fn. Also, the run skips over the E.
- There are also Eb's in the LH chords in m48. Might be a bit too muddy/heavy in the low register, though—up to you.
- For m49-72, see the same things I said about the chords for the first part.

Other than the chords, the way you have this written out is really solid. The big thing is making sure you're hearing the right chords—go back to the original track and double-check the chords and the suggestions I made to make sure you're hearing the track correctly (and also to check that I didn't hear anything incorrectly). (Use AudioStretch if you're not already!)

13
Good thing Static approved of this sheet, because I don't

accepting

14
I really don't like those grace notes in the LH. I feel like it's adding too much to what stay as an extremely simple melody. I don't really hear grace notes in the original anyway. At the very least, if you want to keep the grace notes, I'd recommend F# over Fn. Food for thought.

I'd move the m9 tempo marking up a bit. Having the tempo markings be a consistent distance away from the highest note is better than having them be at the same vertical level, IMO.

Not sure if this is just Finale-specific differences, but when I respace the music by note spacing, things shift around slightly. Maybe do that again?

Also the forte in m17 could be moved one notch right.

15
Hey, sorry for the wait on this one! I just fixed up the formatting for this one; the new files are here: https://www.dropbox.com/sh/4o8cqcgkexrrggm/AABoRQ0l7ODDx9K3v8YJMu4Xa?dl=0.

For future reference, note that I split up the measure distribution into phrases of four wherever possible (matching the structure of the track), except for m100-124 where it got too cramped for that.

Apart from formatting/measure distribution/spacing, a few other small things I changed:
- Added double barlines to delineate sections.
- Changed articulations in m32 to accent+staccato. To my knowledge, marcatos aren't conventional in piano scores.
- Added parentheses in m44/92 RH where the LH and RH overlap.
- Added a missing staccato on m111 RH beat 1.5.
- Removed the lower E in m112/120 RH beat 4.5 to avoid repeating the E three times in a row.
- Added "Tempo primo" to m125 for extra clarification.
- Changed the "D.S. al Fine" to just "D.S." since there is no "Fine."

What I mean is that it would also be equally accurate and would save space to write them as a repeat system with an 8va the second time, since the only difference between the first and second sections is that the second section is an octave higher and is one dynamic louder.
^ With the way the measure distribution worked out, this doesn't even reduce the number of pages, so I just left it as is.

Let me know what you think. If you're good with these files, I'm happy to approve, provided that the second updater double-checks this:
- For m1-16 RH, I hear the second RH note as being tied for most of the measure, and not restruck on beat 2.5. I can hear where you think the restruck rhythm on beat 2.5 is coming from, but I think that's just the underlying chords, and not the strings melody itself.
as someone who owns an sd-90 (which has all the instruments used in len'en music) and has messed around with the patches (including the violin, which is "Violin Vib 2"), i can say to me it does sound more like it's restriking rather than holding. Here's an example of what this sounds like when isolated (though this is from Touhou because I took this from a Touhou soundlist spreadsheet, though they are starting on Len'en. Also song is this for anyone interested).

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