The Rant Thread/My Life Sucks Topic [Don't be pricks]

[Jub3r7]

have you been gay very long?

"im gay"

I didn't realize answering this would be difficult, lol.
I guess I've been attracted to guys and not girls since puberty, but I wouldn't admit it to myself for a while after that, let alone to anyone else.
I know it's different for other people, some don't realize it even until college.

It doesn't help that I was dating a girl from 8th to 10th grade. She was attractive and cute, but I never thought of her sexually, only romantically, about our future, etc.
Back then the idea of dating a guy kind of weirded me out a lot and I wasn't really comfortable with it. But now, more importantly, I think trying to date a girl would be lying about what I feel and who I am.

Something especially important to me that I've thought about for a long time are friends and family that might not be okay with it. I know some people react by saying "if they treat you any worse, you need better friends," or something along those lines.
However, I value friendship a lot more than expressing myself. If I think "being gay" would most definitely make someone uncomfortable, then I don't see any reason to say it, unless I feel some sort of obligation due to my connection with that person.
I don't know which people won't be okay with it, since I can't know unless I tell everybody. In the same way, I'm not willing to give up a good friendship just to try to date someone (for instance, if I can't guarantee our friendship if something goes wrong.)

Another value I really focus on is openness, and this is the /one/ thing I haven't been open about with everyone, my close friends, my family, etc.
So... either I really trust you guys, or I'm really tired of not being able to express myself to the people I care about, or some combination of both.

[close]

[mikey]

oh ok
as for that last bit, it's strangely easier to reveal yourself to complete strangers rather than people you interact with constantly
probably cause you have to see them very often knowing that they know this thing about you that you kinda wish they didn't know, you know?

[Jub3r7]

oh ok
as for that last bit, it's strangely easier to reveal yourself to complete strangers rather than people you interact with constantly
probably cause you have to see them very often knowing that they know this thing about you that you kinda wish they didn't know, you know?

Yeah I know, but the people I hang out with on a regular basis at the moment would /probably/ be okay with it so the ones that are closer to me could probably guess based on some hints I throw like "I would marry Kaden but Corrin isn't gay enough"

I do understand coming out more easily when you don't know the person as well.

[InsigTurtle]

... It is indeed a lot easier to come out when you don't know the other as well.
(I wrote a text wall here but I decided to delete it)
I hope things go well for you.

[Pianist Da Sootopolis]

Congrats for coming out Jub. We all support you!

[braix]

you're still the jub we luv

[FireArrow]

Unless they're hyper conservative, people will usually have much less of a reaction than you'd think. For me it was mostly shock/disbelief at first and then they never brought it up again. Some people were just kinda like "oh" and went along their merry way as if I said nothing. I did a good job of surrounding myself with tolerant people before hand though, so my experience is probably different than a lot of others.

And, yeah, I get what you mean about not telling people. I have a couple friends that I've never told and probably never will, mostly because neither of us gain anything from it and I don't want to loose a friendship over it. On the other side of the coin, I wouldn't keep it from people who you talk to about relationship/sex/love with. Sitting back going "...yeah" while they talk about your future girlfriend isn't really good for you and they'd probably be insulted if they thought you didn't trust them enough to tell them or something.

[BrainyLucario]

you're still the jub we luv

Yeah!

[Bloop]

The Dutch experience for me was way more positive than I imagined. I actually have not met anyone who has had problems with me being gay. The reactions I got were mostly "ah i kinda expected that" "i didn't expect it, but it doesn't surprise me".

[Waddle Bro]

Jub precious cinnamon roll awh

[mikey]

Unless they're hyper conservative, people will usually have much less of a reaction than you'd think. For me it was mostly shock/disbelief at first and then they never brought it up again. Some people were just kinda like "oh" and went along their merry way as if I said nothing. I did a good job of surrounding myself with tolerant people before hand though, so my experience is probably different than a lot of others.

And, yeah, I get what you mean about not telling people. I have a couple friends that I've never told and probably never will, mostly because neither of us gain anything from it and I don't want to loose a friendship over it. On the other side of the coin, I wouldn't keep it from people who you talk to about relationship/sex/love with. Sitting back going "...yeah" while they talk about your future girlfriend isn't really good for you and they'd probably be insulted if they thought you didn't trust them enough to tell them or something.

I think generally most people could care less about others' sexual orientations
even religious people are brought up to be accepting of others so that's the sort of thing I think only happens in the movies

[SlowPokemon]

Nah I have quite a lot of friends whose parents legit refuse to acknowledge or talk about their homosexuality, it's more common in the area I live for it not to be taken seriously. One of them was 20 years old when he came out and his dad said "you're not old enough to know what you want" and his mom said she'd never be okay with it

[FireArrow]

I think generally most people could care less about others' sexual orientations
even religious people are brought up to be accepting of others so that's the sort of thing I think only happens in the movies

I live in a slightly conservative area and so most of the religious people here either mind their own business or are passive aggressive, so yeah what you said applies to me I guess. Any gay person who has the misfortune of living with either a hyper conservative family or community pretty much is living in one of those movies.

And I wouldn't call homophobic religious people as being raised to be accepting (since they're homophobic...), since the mindset is more along the lines "they may be inferior and lesser than you, but still be nice to them" which is tolerance at best. Only people, religious or not, who don't deem homosexuality as less than heterosexuality have the right to claim to be accepting.

[mikey]

"they may be inferior and lesser than you, but still be nice to them"

that's slightly personally offensive to me

[braix]

Rant/My Life Sucks:

The original date for when our moving stuff was predicted to come was this Tuesday. It got extended to Friday. And turns out it's extended again to after next tuesday.

Why I'm salty:
I gotta sleep on the floor for another week.
My poor guitars are getting dryer by the day.
My inability to use my computer is driving me half insane.
I don't want to eat instant ramen noodles for another week.
I'm feeling impatient and want to set up my room

Waiting an extra 3 days was frustrating enough but how am I supposed to okay with the stuff being over a week late from the original arrival date? Ugh

tl;dr: I moved but the stuff is coming late and I'm salty


kthxbai