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Messages - Latios212

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Submissions / Re: [PS2] Tales of the Abyss - "abyss" by thatoneguy
« on: August 08, 2020, 05:05:28 PM »
I can help out with the formatting! But let's get some other stuff sorted out first before I take it the rest of the way :P

- Is the title not supposed to be capitalized? (I assume so, but just checking)
- Is there a reason you have the low E as an octave in m. 1/5/9 but not m. 3/7/11? It sounds the same in all of those places to me. I think it would be easier to play without the lower octave, but up to you. I have some suggestions on how you can make it easier to play if you still want that lower octave to emphasize the beat there.
- Regarding the melody, yeah the 32nd notes are pretty difficult to play at speed like that. What you have works in terms of sound, though. I would recommend one of two things: (1) remove the upper octave everywhere since a single melody line would still sound fine as a piano arrangement, or (2) remove the upper octaves on the 32nd notes, so you can hit the lower D-C-B with 3-2-1 fingering.
- No need for accents on all the RH notes; it's generally understood to emphasize the melody over the accompaniment. If you like, you can put a dynamic above the top staff to denote that it should be played louder, but that's not super necessary.
- Similarly the pedalling here (per measure) is very standard and you could get the point across more succinctly simply with a "con pedale" at the start.
- About the loop, that's interesting - most of the time things loop in game and not in the soundtrack... I usually prefer writing out the loop if possible.
- There are some harmonies you could include in the RH where it's empty - you could write them in something like this:

I can never predict what the heck you're going to submit next lol

Just one real piece of feedback:
- In the bassline of m. 1 and everywhere else that appears, I'm hearing the 16th notes as G-A-G instead of F-G-F
And a couple of tiny visual suggestions:
- The 2. over the repeat section could be moved left a tad to line up with the beat 1 notes
- The D.C. seems a little low and to the left

Great sheet!

Hi! If you could update the files in the submission (as well as the title of the submission in the NSM Panel) with the most recent files including feedback and your response, that would help us continue checking the sheet so we can see what it currently looks like. Thanks :)

My original suggestion was to raise the entire line an octave - were there concerns with it conflicting with the melody? I don't think there's a lot of overlap, and if there is we could possibly omit a note or two here and there or something like that.
All right. I updated the sheets without the octave raises for now until I figure something out.
Asking again - what specifically is your concern for having the second RH raised an octave? At a glance it looks just fine in most places.
- Looking at m. 6-13, the only part that overlaps is around beat 4 of m. 7/11 - you can easily lower the Bb in the left hand beat 3.75 down an octave
- Looking at m. 14-21, similarly the only part that looks awkward is the same Bb in a similar figure in m. 14/18

Submissions / Re: [NES] California Games - "Menu" by ShyYoshiGuy
« on: August 06, 2020, 04:36:13 AM »
Awesome! Adjusted the formatting and reset the staccatos and reuploaded the files.


Okay, great! I went ahead and updated the file with the remaining changes. With that I say this one is good :)

Let me know if I missed or messed up anything.

edit: added Intelligent Systems to the copyright

Submissions / Re: [NES] California Games - "Menu" by ShyYoshiGuy
« on: August 06, 2020, 02:28:36 AM »
First measure RH should look like this:

That's about it though aside from tiny formatting things! Somehow the staccatos got shifted around, but I can fix the spacing and stuff if the above feedback looks good to you.

You can also refer to this guide for a general idea but it isn't fully comprehensive and there are some exceptions.
I also wrote up this :) Basic rhythm grouping in 4/4

Woohoo! Let's get this one in! Thanks all for the hard work on this one, it looks fantastic!

Great job, awesome sheet! I love this song haha, been playing a lot of Origami King. I'll get to notes and stuff before making the formatting edits and such. Let me know if you need help with any of these.
- Rest in m. 4 should be at normal staff height
- I think the mordent in m. 6 would be better below the C# (so it's closer to the notehead)
- RH beat 1 of m. 9 should have an F# under the B
- Tie in m. 18 should bend downwards
- m. 28 shouldn't have a courtesy natural on the Bn (B harmony is already apparent from the beginning of the measure). Similarly, no sharp in m. 40
- I think the A on beat 3.5 of m. 41 would be better written in the left hand

Dynamics, I would suggest a few changes in this vein (feel free to take into account if you want, or not, this is just my thought after listening through a couple of times)
- p at the beginning (soft start)
- cresc to mp at m. 6
- RH p at m. 14
- mp at 18
- mf at m. 21 (noticeable change in tone from the previous few measures)
- dim in m. 23 to mp in 24
- (as you have it)
- mf as 40 (seems a little less powerful than m. 28 section)
- mp at m. 46

Oh, and one last thing for now:
- The pedal markings should affect the playback and should be invisible.
It's not required that the pedal for playback has to work perfectly, so we can skip over that part since the sheet music will look as intended. Unless you really want it to, then I or someone else can help out with it.

This looks terrific :D Just a last couple of aesthetic things before we call this one finished:
- E flat in m. 6 should be D# instead (major third in B7 chord)
- Some of the melody notes in m. 9-10 should be flipped downwards
- m. 11 and 16 shouldn't have the last dotted quarter rest in the lower staff because the voice moves to the top staff
- I think m. 24-25 makes more sense as one large 6/4 bar because it's one extended phrase.

We made these edits for you, so all good to accept if it's all good by you :)

2020 Week 31

Quick one for today :)

Pokémon FireRed Version & Pokémon LeafGreen Version
NEW!   Mystery Gift[MUS] [MIDI] [PDF] [Original] 

Final feedback!

In general, there are a number of places where a single layer plays a quarter tied to eighth rhythm on beat 1 / beat 3. This is better condensed into a dotted quarter.

Aside from that, I went through the sheet with Atcero and corrected a few transcription errors here and there. They include:
- Melody in second half of m. 6/10
- Melody in beat 1 of m. 16
- Bass in m. 14
- Bass in m. 33 and 45
- Melody in m. 22-23
- Melody in m. 26
- Beat 2/4 melody in m. 28-29
- Added harmony in m. 30-31
- Harmony in m. 33-34
- Lowered RH of m. 46 an octave to transition better with the parts around it
- Added some more bass notes in the last few measures and corrected pitch (Cx) in m. 49 beats 3-4

Take a quick look over to see if I've messed anything up - if this all looks good to you, will accept this one! :D

edit: ninja'd haha, accepting now! Happy first sheet accepted!

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